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S06.E03: Danny & Rosa


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Danny is intent on building a family with his beautiful online love, despite her violent past. But when he enlists Nev and Max to help him finally meet her in person, they soon discover she may have ties to a former Catfish.

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OK: I'm not gonna lie: I MIGHTA shed a tear or two at couch time.

Now, for some people, being touched by the whole prayer thing might be a totally normal response; hell, I guess in lots of places, DOING the prayer thing might be a fairly normative experience.

But I'm a (Jewish-raised) atheist from NY, and it wasn't until I moved down to FL (for realz moved, not Jose-moved) that I even experienced such public displays and expectations of religion (wherein religion= Christianity, match), and, especially when someone learns I'm sick (but for far smaller ... offenses ... as well), it seems like someone is constantly either offering to pray for me or telling me that I "need" to (pray to Jesus, etc.)*--something I try to take as the kind gesture I know it's generally meant to be but must admit am often offended by, both due to the assumption/presumption in general and, more specifically, as it relates to illness and disability (getting too off-topic here, but the short version is that it seems fairly offensive to me to imply that, well, if you just prayed more (read: were a better person), you wouldn't be suffering, and/or you are suffering because you don't).

So, long story not short, my hackles were already up with this dude's constant God-pushing while simultaneously acknowledging he'd basically stalked this catfish across many hit-up ignorings, months, and pages, simply because she was hot (and I was also suspicious of his homophobia, although I'll grant that "If you like guys, why not holla at some guys" was fair enough, but, given that he already knew he was meeting a liar who didn't look like The Mask whom he'd all but stalked to talk to in the first place, 45 years ago or whatevs, his reiterated "embarrassment" made me think more of the Jenny Jones Show debacle than that his own dumbass (and creepy, imho) actions were finally dawning on him).

 

But I was also, admitttedly, softening on how he'd handled Couch Time so far (maybe his "suggestions" were scripted, but I also think Max's words about "being the hero"--which actually sounded a lot less gross than when Dr. Phil says "someone" has to be (the hero), and that "someone" just so happens to ALWAYS be the dad in a het-couple-led family--actually did strike a chord with him and, after he'd de- JennyhomoPhonesified himself, juxtaposed with his God Is Good side over his Want Hot (female) Ass side to want to Do Good.

 

Still, when he asked if he could pray for him, I admittedly 1) rolled my eyes even though I think it's a lot more respectful when someone asks and 2) assumed he meant, like, generically, as in, "while obviously I'm not gonna speak or send puppy emojis to your fat male ass again after I get outta this AirBnB (but why are we meeting here today but yesterday we were in some Section 8 backdoor with maleness-hiding plot device doorway stringies on The Doorway's Outside?!), but, like, I'll totally ask Jesus to make your life less shitty when I'm at church, since obvs your lack of doing so is what led it to be as such in the first place"...

And, so, truth. The actual prayer? First of all, shocked me. It was not just free of judgment but was much closer to the "be with and support this person deal with what's what and may that lead to something hopefully less shitty" type of prayer that, at least personally, is the only type I've ever received that hasn't made me want to cause the pray-er the need for as much *hope* of healing as I have, and it seemed to really cover what Jose (who obvs was open to something more...explicit than I might be) needed, showing Danny really did get him/realized that he still HAD been talking to this person for eleventy years, once he'd had the night to help his Fear of Teh Gay wear off, and/or they've got a good priest on retainer to help with their scriptwriting. And, yeah, my icy, cold, evil heart melted, and the annoyance I expected, fuck, WANTED to feel gave way to something far more horrifying: touchingness (or whatever real word would describe this foreign emotion), and, then, even crazier, tears condensation from that momentary heart thaw were rolling down my face. Fo' real, if my cat hadn't been sleeping, I probably woulda been as embarrassed as homomomentia Danny.

I was kind of relieved when I could dry 'em off so easily with all that air they got from all the rolling they did when the show ended by teaching me that being fat is no longer just one of the three greatest crimes a catfisher can commit, he can now repent this sin by [allegedly] losing weight by being filmed on an ab- roller at Four Months Later Time (at least Jose didn't have to have a sex change for having done the Catfish Crime double whammy of fat AND wrong sex. I guess he "lucked out" that he and Rosa/Natalie were similarly complectef, as I'm terrified to think of how our Feel Good ending would have shown-don't-[just]-tell-[before and after each commercial break] the resolution of god helps Jos who help themselves if he had, god forbid, also hit the third of the Hatfish: marked insecurity as to being darker skinned and thus picking a lighter   mask! 

 

 

*I've learned that telling someone I'm Jewish usually shuts them up --whether it's because they truly believe a conversion would be a long and likely dead-end road or because they don't want to sound anti-Semitic by pushing it--even if they are clueless enough that I have to explain that Jews don't pray to Jesus (while maybe still thinking "Bitch going to hell," there IS at least enough awareness here that you don't publicly put Judaism, a privilege I realize many other religions currently lack), I have my suspicions--but I have found that if I say I'm an atheist, they think proselytizing is both fair game and called for (and for such types, I don't like to combine the two, as I think many who are that unaware and/or tone deaf  already think Jews are "godless," so I worry about adding negatively to their misinformation)

  • Love 3
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Damn, I sure do think that Danny is a creepy, controlling, waaaay out of touch with reality stalker. He follows a photo he thinks is hot over more than one site even though his first attempt to contact was ignored and then planning a life with someone he's never met who he want's to "fix". OK then! Zero sympathy from me. 

ETA I did like how he handled the Catfish situation after the big reveal and he obviously had a huge role in the guy's transformation. I hope he continues to do well. 

Edited by DiabLOL
  • Love 3
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That was one of the nicest reactions to a "lying about their sex" catfishes I've ever seen.

Totally impressed with that guy's brand of Christianity, although he was a little sanctimonious, but still.  Damn.  The way he switched gears was pretty amazing and definitely speaks to his own character.

  • Love 13
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Can someone with Facebook explain to me how many FB friends are normal?  In the past couple of eps, Nev & Max seem to think having friends in the 300s is low to normal, but I can't trust their judgment because Nev got this show based on his proclivity to be a social media slut.  This ep had Rosa's FB account with 15 people as friends being highly suspicious, which, perhaps is if Rosa is one to be trolling for dudes to chat with on the web.  But how many FB friends would an average, non catfishing person have?  Multiple hundreds just seems ridiculously high to me, unless the user is using the FB account for a business networking purpose.

As for this episode, I really wanted Nev or Max to go at Danny harder for being a stalker with douchy white knight syndrome.

  • Love 5
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1 hour ago, Lizzing said:

Can someone with Facebook explain to me how many FB friends are normal?  In the past couple of eps, Nev & Max seem to think having friends in the 300s is low to normal, but I can't trust their judgment because Nev got this show based on his proclivity to be a social media slut.  This ep had Rosa's FB account with 15 people as friends being highly suspicious, which, perhaps is if Rosa is one to be trolling for dudes to chat with on the web.  But how many FB friends would an average, non catfishing person have?  Multiple hundreds just seems ridiculously high to me, unless the user is using the FB account for a business networking purpose.

As for this episode, I really wanted Nev or Max to go at Danny harder for being a stalker with douchy white knight syndrome.

In my experience, the "normal" number of friends depends a lot on the age of the user.  For people in their 20s and younger, the friend numbers tend to be a lot higher since they seem to add everyone they've ever met or anyone who sends them a friend request (including people they haven't even met-- hence the catfish relationships).  I'm 40 and have about 200, whereas a friend of mine who is 27 has over a thousand. 

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I have to confess that when I first started watching this show, I had a little crush on Nev, but now I think he's a creeper and it's Max I adore. How could they not call Danny on his "not judging a book by its cover" b.s.? Seems like they let a lot slide this episode. I thought the catfish seemed very troubled and that they were out of their league in terms of helping him, but in the end they didn't offer him much aid and he seemed have to bounced back -- go figure.  I wonder if Danny decided it was better to come across as a caring, forgiving type of guy rather than an idiot. Kinda too late for that by the time you are on this show.

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I dunno. I thought Danny was pretty likable on the whole. Delusional, sure, but he was a good looking kid, "Rosa" wasn't out of his league. He wanted to believe it so he believed it, but he called on Nev and Max because deep down inside he knew. He wanted it to be Rosa, but he knew. I give him a pass on his dismay at the reveal. The most open minded person in the world would be a little taken aback in a similar situation, I think. 

At 62 I have about 300 FB friends. My 23 year old son and his friends have counts in the high hundreds/low thousands. Someone "Rosa's" age with only 100 friends is definitely an eyebrow raiser.

Another atheist here and I was touched by Danny's prayer. It seemed to come from a place of true caring and kindness.

  • Love 5
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1 hour ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Someone "Rosa's" age with only 100 friends is definitely an eyebrow raiser.

A low count usually just means the person has an account out of necessity and their "real" account is someplace else, probably more trendy for somebody that age.

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4 hours ago, kitten59 said:

Is it just me or did no one address the fact that there was a former catfish on Jose's  fake page!?

It's not just you. They teased us with this red herring and we're just supposed to forget that Jose connected to Brandy on FB? That was just weird. I was thinking maybe Jose could introduce Danny to Brandy, but all Danny really needs to do is start sending out those puppy-humping-a-heart emojis and he'll eventually strike gold.

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Thanks for all the FB feedback.  :)

I did wonder about that connection to Brandy.  Since we know it's usually the catfish that really contacts the show to come clean, perhaps Jose (under his mask account) contacted Brandy to see how to go about it and Brandy covered for him/the sake of the show?  But then, if so, why would Nev & Max even mention it?  It annoyed me that this was glossed over so much but there was time for B roll of Jose working out and going to church.

  • Love 5
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amazing how blinded some of these guys can be just because of some pretty pictures. Some of these people on this show act as if they've never seen an attractive person.

Danny did right at the end, but he was so full of it through most of the show, he had one thing on his mind and Rosa's "personality" had nothing to do with it. 

  • Love 3
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I'm sick of people putting bad behavior on bullying.  Jose should be lucky Danny didn't smack the shit out of him.  Jose needs serious therapy.  Also STFU Max with your "hero" bullshit.

Too bad Natalie can't sue Jose's sorry behind.

It seems like there are more damaged people around these days.

Edited by Neurochick
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First.. I also don't know how these people fall for some of these voices. I didnt think Rosa sounded like a guy but I definitely thought 'she' sounded like a big girl. That voice did not match the pictures. 

Also.. maybe it's just because I'm on my period but I immediately started crying as soon as Jose walked out that door lol. I don't want to sound mean and shallow but he is not an attractive person at all. And he's clearly gay. Life has to have been hard for him. I just felt so incredibly bad for him I started crying lol. I don't think bullying is the reason why Jose did any of that and I think everyone knew it. It's probably embarrassing for him to really lay out and dig into why he created a female profile and catfished a guy. Maybe he hadn't come out of the closet and wanted a relationship with a man? Or he's extremely insecure and can't form real relationships that aren't online? I don't blame him for using bullying as his excuse. 

But what was with that weird ending showing Jose getting his life together. I think this was another ad by Catfish to lure more weirdos out there to come on the show. Like 'See you won't just be embarrassing yourself on national TV! You'll actually get something out of it!' 

& I also love Max now! It's hot when he gets all pissed off and calls out the catfish lol he's definitely my favorite out of the two. 

  • Love 7
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On 3/18/2017 at 2:36 PM, Lizzing said:

I did wonder about that connection to Brandy.  Since we know it's usually the catfish that really contacts the show to come clean, perhaps Jose (under his mask account) contacted Brandy to see how to go about it and Brandy covered for him/the sake of the show?  But then, if so, why would Nev & Max even mention it?  It annoyed me that this was glossed over so much but there was time for B roll of Jose working out and going to church.

Yeah, I kind of got the feeling that Jose thought this might get him on TV from the start. He obviously watches the show and maybe friend-requested several past Catfishes but Brandy was the one who accepted.

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I think "Rosa" friended Brandy because she was a catfish, maybe hoping to start a friendship with her.  Kindred spirits and all. Brandy probably got a lot of new friend requests after the show so that's probably why she didn't think any of it or know who Rosa was. 

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On 8/13/2017 at 0:53 PM, skillet68us said:

Danny, I'm in st cloud, Florida if you wanna hang out!! I think he's a cutie!!

the pickings are really that slim in St Cloud huh?...lol

Edited by EDTV
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From Tara's recap,
 

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You guys, has this part of the episode started seeming thin because we are all so familiar with their moves by now, or are they really doing WAY LESS than they used to? Maybe both!

Hell yes, a piss poor investigation.  No spokeo, and if she'd really been arrested, you can check arrest records, at least by date, in my part of Florida.
Of course, the prey could just fax them the information, and save a lot of air fares.
And I'm over 60, and have not quite 300 Facebook friends.  There are probably about 20 or so that I interact with most often.

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