Melanie & Devar: Jamaican Me Crazy

[PamelaMaeSnap]

Maybe Devar could get that modeling gig that Loren has planned for Alexei. Because IMHO in the looks department, Devar > Alexei bigtime.

[PamPote65]

Maybe Devar could get that modeling gig that Loren has planned for Alexei. Because IMHO in the looks department, Devar > Alexei bigtime

I agree.  Alexei has the better face, but is too tall and lanky.  Devar has a more proportionate body, but maybe too large a nose.

[Yolapukka]

Whether or not Bev is 100%  (or 90%) justified in her mistrust of Devar, she would have a problem with anyone Melanie was involved with. She'd always find something. I guarantee that if Mel dated or married someone from a similar background from the same geographic area who was financially successful and was on exactly same page as Mel in terms of what he wanted out of life, Bev would still find something to take incessant issue with. She justifies it by saying Melanie is her younger sister and I think that's what it's really about. Melanie seems to have a more successful and accomplished life than Bev and the only way  Bev can deal is pretending she has a level of wisdom her sister lacks. What Bev really has is a shitty personality and a chestful of ill-considered tattoos.

[RCharter]

Whether or not Bev is 100%  (or 90%) justified in her mistrust of Devar, she would have a problem with anyone Melanie was involved with. She'd always find something. I guarantee that if Mel dated or married someone from a similar background from the same geographic area who was financially successful and was on exactly same page as Mel in terms of what he wanted out of life, Bev would still find something to take incessant issue with. She justifies it by saying Melanie is her younger sister and I think that's what it's really about. Melanie seems to have a more successful and accomplished life than Bev and the only way  Bev can deal is pretending she has a level of wisdom her sister lacks. What Bev really has is a shitty personality and a chestful of ill-considered tattoos.

Agree 100% with your entire post.  I don't think Bev is concerned, Bev is jealous.  Melanie may not be much to look at, but you can tell she is the "hot sister" between the two.  And like you said, she seems more accomplished overall. And it was likely always that way growing up.  I'm sure Bev had issues with Hunter's father, and anyone else Mel has dated.

[Adeejay]

Melanie told Dr. Phil that so far, she has spent $33,000 on Devar.  $29,200 on trips to Jamaica, $1,800 for his visa and the rest on his general up keep, because he didn't work for four months while waiting for his visa.  The amount Devar has spent on Melanie is $0.  Dr. Phil seemed taken aback.  He told Melanie that there are huge red flags in their relationship and that she should be very careful. 

[jujuebes]

Melanie told Dr. Phil that so far, she has spent $33,000 on Devar.  $29,200 on trips to Jamaica, $1,800 for his visa and the rest on his general up keep, because he didn't work for four months while waiting for his visa.  The amount Devar has spent on Melanie is $0.  Dr. Phil seemed taken aback.  He told Melanie that there are huge red flags in their relationship and that she should be very careful. 

Not only that, but after three trips and being together for only 10 days Devar proposed. I believe they said this was over 3 months or so, but at least the other couples met online and talked for a much longer time.

 

I don't like the way Devar talks with a few words, long pause, few more words, long pause etc as if trying to come off as sly as possible. Notice he says "Sshhh" and stops and changes it to "My lovely."

 

Why would he quit his job if he isn't 100% sure when he was leaving, he could of worked until the very last day and just said "CYA!"

 

Why was Devar the one testing the sisters??? HE IS THE SUSPICIOUS ONE! Sounds like he is trying to feel out the family on how secretive he should be.

 

I don't think Bev is jealous at all, I hope the show is more than the youtube version because Bev was brought there to repeat the exact same thing she said on the show and nothing else??? How about input on seeing them interact after the show, what about her comment on the wedding day??? Bev's husband seems handsome even though overweight or muscular, so again I don't see the jealousy.

 

The constant affection is sickening and seems over the top as if trying to convince people, just like the crying on the wedding day, did anyone actually see tears? I hate PDA, it's like when you see a new couple together they are all over each other and then it will fizzle out or they are seperated a few weeks later... Pace yourselves! I'm now having flashbacks of couples making out in lines...that's the worst.

Edited December 10, 2015 by jujuebes

[Yolapukka]

Melanie spent just shy of $30,000 on travel and Dr. Phil warns her that she needs to see the red flags? Flags like the one where she spends her own money, by her own choice on herself and characterizes it as spending money on her SO?  Devar should have at least ponied up for his own visa, but I fail to see how Melanie's choice to spend money on frequent trips to the tropics (something many can only dream about)  to visit him are on anyone other than her. Presumably, she could afford it and if she can't, then Devar should have been the one seeing red flags himself.

 

Dr. Phil always seems taken aback, right before he says something condescending and cobbled together from random catch-phrases to give it a veneer of folksiness.

 

I think Devar might not be in it for the long run but only time will tell.  Mel is a grown-ass woman who is well capable of making her own mistakes. I might not like it if I was her sister but I would hope that I'd have enough sense not to undermine her once the wedding had gone through.

 

I don't think Bev is jealous, per se but I think she needs to look down on her sister's choices and infantilize her. 

Edited December 10, 2015 by yuggapukka

[jujuebes]

Melanie spent just shy of $30,000 on travel and Dr. Phil warns her that she needs to see the red flags? Flags like the one where she spends her own money, by her own choice on herself and characterizes it as spending money on her SO? Maybe Devar should have ponied up for his own visa, but I fail to see how Melanie's choice to spend money on frequent trips to the tropics (something many can only dream about)  to visit him are on anyone other than her. Presumably, she could afford it and if she can't, then Devar should have been the one seeing red flags himself.

 

Dr. Phil always seems taken aback, right before he says something condescending and cobbled together from random catch-phrases to give it a veneer of folksiness.

 

If someone is taking several trips to see me that is costing a lot I would see it as a GREEN flag to milk the situation since they obviously have money. After 6 weeks he proposed.

Edited December 10, 2015 by jujuebes

[RCharter]

Melanie spent just shy of $30,000 on travel and Dr. Phil warns her that she needs to see the red flags? Flags like the one where she spends her own money, by her own choice on herself and characterizes it as spending money on her SO? Maybe Devar should have ponied up for his own visa, but I fail to see how Melanie's choice to spend money on frequent trips to the tropics (something many can only dream about)  to visit him are on anyone other than her. Presumably, she could afford it and if she can't, then Devar should have been the one seeing red flags himself.

 

Dr. Phil always seems taken aback, right before he says something condescending and cobbled together from random catch-phrases to give it a veneer of folksiness.

did he push the diet book?  I can't take condescension from a overweight man pushing a diet book.

 

But absolutely agree, Melanie is a 33 year old woman with a son, how did Devar suddenly become responsible for her choice to fly to Jamaica all the time?  And if she was spending 30k, she was staying at nice places.  Didn't she say it was like 6 trips?  Thats too much for 6 trips if she was going by herself.  Why couldn't she stay with Devar if money was such an issue?  If he was the love of her life, I think he would have found a way to accommodate.  She could have slept on a couch, or Devar could have taken the couch.  At the very least she didn't need to stay at top level places.  I understand that there must be safety concerns, what with all the Jamaican men trolling for white American women to woo....but still.....

[Yolapukka]

 

If someone is taking several trips to see me that is costing a lot I would see it as a GREEN flag to milk the situation since they obviously have money.

 

If they can afford it, sure, it would be a green flag if you were inclined to take advantage. If they can not afford it, then marrying someone who spends money they don't have is pretty damn stupid, especially if they have unsupportable debts. 

Edited December 10, 2015 by yuggapukka

[cooksdelight]

I imagine Melanie was getting nice hotels with room service so she and Devar could have hot wild mink sex.

[RCharter]

I imagine Melanie was getting nice hotels with room service so she and Devar could have hot wild mink sex.

If you're a couple of hot minx, you'll be having hot, wild minx sex no matter where you are :)

 

However, I imagine the minx sex is hotter in a nice hotel room than in an air mattress with your fiance's sisters in the other room.....

 

I wonder if Devar thought she made more money than she did.  Like jujubees said, I think its natural to assume that someone who is spending 30k in travel to visit you is pretty loaded...to the point where they might not really mind that you send home the lions share of your income.  I can see where the conversations never happened because she just wanted to have fun, hot minx sex and not ruin it by talking about finances.

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

Damn damn damn my DVR it didn't record! What'd Bev have to say ?

[RCharter]

Damn damn damn my DVR it didn't record! What'd Bev have to say ?

someone linked a YouTube clip to the entire show in the Season 3: Links Threads.  I don't think they were on the show for a long time and they weren't the first guest so you can probably click through and find their segment!

[nlkm9]

Dr Phil has spent many episodes discussing the risks of bringing an non-biologically related male into a home with young children...yet he said NOTHING about the fact that Melanie essentially moved in a virtual stranger with her and her son and said more than a few times "I want Devar to be a father figure to Hunter". That was the thing that worried me the most....yes, the 33K she spent to see DEvar could have gone to Hunters college fund as some have suggested, but never have I seen much concern for her son in all this. He seems to be a good kid, maybe she will be lucky in all this.

I also wonder if she had him quit lifeguarding because she didnt want other women hitting on him. I think they are attracted to each other, but think its suspicious that he had been trying to get the US for so many years. I'm more worried about her son, Melanie can take care of herself.

[cooksdelight]

I also wonder if she had him quit lifeguarding because she didnt want other women hitting on him

Another thing I wish Dr. Phil had touched upon during that part of the questioning. Because that makes more sense than any of the reasons Melanie was trying to come up with. Or Devar, with that 6-month contract thing.

[RCharter]

Dr Phil has spent many episodes discussing the risks of bringing an non-biologically related male into a home with young children...yet he said NOTHING about the fact that Melanie essentially moved in a virtual stranger with her and her son and said more than a few times "I want Devar to be a father figure to Hunter". That was the thing that worried me the most....yes, the 33K she spent to see DEvar could have gone to Hunters college fund as some have suggested, but never have I seen much concern for her son in all this. He seems to be a good kid, maybe she will be lucky in all this.

I also wonder if she had him quit lifeguarding because she didnt want other women hitting on him. I think they are attracted to each other, but think its suspicious that he had been trying to get the US for so many years. I'm more worried about her son, Melanie can take care of herself.

You truly never know, but my spidey senses don't tingle with Devar.  Of course that doesn't mean he is innocent, but I just don't get that vibe from him.

 

I'm also happy that Hunter has a father who is very involved in his life.  I feel like predators tend to pick people that don't have anyone looking out for them.  I was far more worried about Mo last season.  Not because I got that vibe from him, but if he wanted to do anything, Dani would have absolutely protected him and thrown her kids to the wolves (like she did with her son).

 

I'm hoping Hunter's father is a little more....financially stable and is the one planning for college.

 

I think Devar likes Melanie, I don't know if he is in love with Melanie.  I could see him straying if he finds a better offer, or hanging out with her if its not too difficult a life.

Edited December 11, 2015 by RCharter

[NikSac]

When they first introduced Melanie, didn't they say she had her son only on weekends?  It caught my attention because I thought that was kind of strange, but I may have heard it wrong. I know there are all kinds of custody arrangements out there, but I kept wondering why it was only weekends (again if I heard it right).

[Christina]

On the show, she said she had her son on weekends, but she was all over the FB page saying that she has him every other week, and his dad had him the other 50% of the time.

[KarmaG]

When they intro'd her she said she had him every other weekend and some other random times. *shrugs*

[nlkm9]

I never ever thought for a second that Devar was a danger to Hunter, its just as a mom, if I had my son only 50% of the time, I dont think I would be moving a stranger I barely knew from another country  in with us and expect him to be a "father figure". --she took a risk with her child, but it seems to have worked out. I do think that devar is attracted to her, I actually think they are cute together, but I dont see this as a long term thing. I cant help but hope for them.

[RCharter]

I never ever thought for a second that Devar was a danger to Hunter, its just as a mom, if I had my son only 50% of the time, I dont think I would be moving a stranger I barely knew from another country  in with us and expect him to be a "father figure". --she took a risk with her child, but it seems to have worked out. I do think that devar is attracted to her, I actually think they are cute together, but I dont see this as a long term thing. I cant help but hope for them.

I think he is attracted to her, I think he likes her, but can I see him hanging around when times get tough?  Does he love her that much?  Or will he leave her for something a little more convenient at the first sign of real trouble?  I get the impression that its the latter.  And I think she might know it too, which is why she seems to have made such an effort to convince him that she was wealthier than she was in Jamaica.  She paid his bills, she visited him often and stayed in hotels. Perhaps all in an effort to make him believe that life with her would be easy and fun so that he would want to come over.

 

I think Hunter would be hurt if Devar left, but luckily he does have his own father in his life as a steady influence which is nice.

[Miss Chevious]

I saw them on Dr Phil and it was pointed out he has spent 0 on this relationship and she's put in about 33K. Really? All I can say is she must've been desperate for arm candy. He's in his late twenties, had a job in Jamaica and hadn't saved a dime? Red flag! He couldn't even pay for a ring? Another red flag! He's so obviously in this for the free ride she's foolishly going to keep on providing. Of course he's attracted to her . Who wouldn't be if someone else was footing the bill for everything? There's a difference between being in love and being stupid. She needs a reality check. It'll be interesting to see if he actually gets a job when he is allowed to do so.

Edited December 11, 2015 by Miss Chevious

[Neurochick]

I watched the show and Dr. Phil is a douche.  Someone should have asked him if the genders were reversed, would anybody have an issue with a man spending 30K.

 

The constant affection is sickening and seems over the top as if trying to convince people, just like the crying on the wedding day, did anyone actually see tears? I hate PDA, it's like when you see a new couple together they are all over each other and then it will fizzle out or they are seperated a few weeks later... Pace yourselves! I'm now having flashbacks of couples making out in lines...that's the worst.

 

 

See, I don't have a problem with PDA (just not too much please).  I used to date a man who didn't even want to hold hands in public WTF?  I started to think he was ashamed of being with a black woman, so I kicked his ass to the curb; he was a nice guy, but if you don't to hold my hand in public, then you can't do it in private either.

[NikSac]

Weird about the custody thing. I wonder what the truth actually is.  Maybe she only had him every once in awhile for awhile there while she was so busy traveling back and forth to Jamaica.

 

I didn't see the show, but I have a major problem with her saying she spent $33k on him.  What, she didn't get anything out of all of those trips to Jamaica? I'd love to be able to go on vacation to such a fun and relaxing location as often as she did!  Granted she was going in part to see him, but she was also taking vacations herself. I do agree it's telling that he had nothing in savings, quit working so early, and has spent nothing on her, but she spent a lot of that $33k on vacations.

[jujuebes]

I watched the show and Dr. Phil is a douche.  Someone should have asked him if the genders were reversed, would anybody have an issue with a man spending 30K.

 

 

See, I don't have a problem with PDA (just not too much please).  I used to date a man who didn't even want to hold hands in public WTF?  I started to think he was ashamed of being with a black woman, so I kicked his ass to the curb; he was a nice guy, but if you don't to hold my hand in public, then you can't do it in private either.

 

I don't consider holding hands or an arm around to be PDA even though I guess it is by definition. I guess it's more so the degree of it? Lets just say there are a lot of inconsiderate couples that wait in lines and it has traumatized me!

 

I just feel like instead of a peck, Devar wants to makeout and I think he stated it in the last episode when they were having that party he doesn't care who knows it.

Edited December 11, 2015 by jujuebes

[Steve]

Several weeks ago I posted that I didn't think Melanie could keep her "trophy husband" for very long and I wrote that I thought Devar might have other motives for being with her.  But when I saw him get choked up reading his marriage vows he won me over.  I think he's sincere.  The relationship still might not last, but I think he loves her right now.

 

As for spending $30,000 on travel, she is being very careless if she spends that on 6 trips to Jamaica and has very little money left over.  She could do 6 trips for $10K if she's careful.  And why does she need 6 trips?  Is she afraid he'll be cheating on her?  The money issues are where I think they will have problems.  I think Devar and Hunter can get along well, but the money issues are going to be tough.

 

And I don't buy her claim that she didn't go to Jamaica looking for a husband.  Jamaica is the middle-aged woman's "mail order husband" favorite.  Finally, she looked pretty good on the Tell All episode.  She looked a little chunky at the wedding, but maybe she dropped a few pounds.  I still wouldn't want her with a tattoo, but she cleaned up well.

Edited December 11, 2015 by Steve

[nlkm9]

shes only 33!! please tell me thats not middle aged, lol.

There are a lot of red flags, until the Dr Phl show I thought nothing of any of it. the fact that she spent so much money and then complained she was broke, and then had a full wedding and made her parents buy the rings..its just wierd. its wierd that he was trying to get to the US for so many years. Its wierd that she sent him money. But it is her life, except when/if this affects her son....she did say several times she was looking for a father figure for Hunter.

Wonder why we never saw her parents??

[jujuebes]

This thought just entered my mind since the amount she spent on travel was made clear...

 

Since Melanie gave Devar money when he wasn't working you could assume he used it on the family bills, so when the sister is talking to Devar online saying the bills are piling up, was she expecting Melanie just to give more money with the idea that she had it to spare?

 

Then when they meet his mom they were talking about how long the visa process is and how when Devar told his mom about Melanie she told him to drop out of the visa process. Then the mom says "If you love him, you have to help him out." Then Melanie states she had no idea he was even doing that process...

 

I still think Devar was serious about sending 90% of his earnings, especially with him still thinking Melanie had plenty of money.

 

There seem to be way to many things that they don't know about each other.

Edited December 11, 2015 by jujuebes

[RCharter]

This thought just entered my mind since the amount she spent on travel was made clear...

 

Since Melanie gave Devar money when he wasn't working you could assume he used it on the family bills, so when the sister is talking to Devar online saying the bills are piling up, was she expecting Melanie just to give more money with the idea that she had it to spare?

 

Then when they meet his mom they were talking about how long the visa process is and how when Devar told his mom about Melanie she told him to drop out of the visa process. Then the mom says "If you love him, you have to help him out." Then Melanie states she had no idea he was even doing that process...

 

I still think Devar was serious about sending 90% of his earnings, especially with him still thinking Melanie had plenty of money.

 

There seem to be way to many things that they don't know about each other.

I think the bolded is key, and it feel a little "bait and switch"  I think she led him to believe she had plenty of money and once she got him over here she dropped the bomb on him.  And if thats the case I think most of the blame lies with her.  She led him to believe that she had plenty of money and so she wouldn't need his.  If he was operating under that assumption than whatever money he made could be easily sent back to his family because she was rolling in the dough.

[Steve]

Reading some more comments, I wonder if she spent $30K on 6 trips because she was giving him money.  That's what a desperate sugar daddy would do.

 

As for him sending 90% of his money back home, I think he said in the final episode interviews that he was joking about that, but I wonder.

 

As far as Melanie being 33, I didn't say SHE is middle-aged.  Re-read my comment.

Edited December 12, 2015 by Steve

[nlkm9]

he was not joking-he even said a second time something to the effect that he didnt care if it make Melanie angry....

I think he said he was being "sarcastic" to save face. I wonder if mel ever met his family. 33 K for 6 trips is a ton of money. wow, lol. and then she says shes broke --just wierd...

so why do you say Jamaica is a middle aged womans place? just curious..

 

<<Then Melanie states she had no idea he was even doing that process...>>

I missed that. wow.

[nlkm9]

<<As far as Melanie being 33, I didn't say SHE is middle-aged.  Re-read my comment.>>

 

 

...And I don't buy her claim that she didn't go to Jamaica looking for a husband.  Jamaica is the middle-aged woman's "mail order husband" favorite.  Finally, she looked pretty good on the Tell All episode.  She looked a little chunky at the wedding, but maybe she dropped a few pounds.  I still wouldn't want her with a tattoo, but she cleaned up well. ..

 

this implies that the is among the middle aged ---but whatever!!

[Steve]

My comment was:

 

Jamaica is the middle-aged woman's "mail order husband" favorite.

 

That means exactly what it says, nothing more.  There is no mention of Melanie, but whatever.

[Neurochick]

I don't consider holding hands or an arm around to be PDA even though I guess it is by definition. I guess it's more so the degree of it? Lets just say there are a lot of inconsiderate couples that wait in lines and it has traumatized me!

 

I just feel like instead of a peck, Devar wants to makeout and I think he stated it in the last episode when they were having that party he doesn't care who knows it.

 

I don't understand how couples making out an traumatize a grown adult.

[Bella]

It is getting increasingly heated in here. Please dial it back so that we don't end up having to issue warnings.

Which we will do if this keeps up.

Thanks.

[Toaster Strudel]

Maybe not looking for a husband per se... but probably looking for a hook up!

[Aw my lahgs]

Melanie visited Jamaica for some lovin', not for actual love.

[RCharter]

Melanie visited Jamaica for some lovin', not for actual love.

Most definitely.

Edited December 13, 2015 by RCharter

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

someone linked a YouTube clip to the entire show in the Season 3: Links Threads.  I don't think they were on the show for a long time and they weren't the first guest so you can probably click through and find their segment!

Thank you, late to the party now the link is broken wahhh anybody got anything?

[Cherrio]

Most definitely.

LOL           classic !

[Neurochick]

I feel that Melanie led Devar to think she was well off, better off than she actually was.  Maybe that's why Devar said he'd sent 90% of his money home, because he thought Melanie had money to burn.  I mean what working person can take all those trips to Jamaica?  Melanie has blown her savings and now wants Devar to contribute.  Dr. Phil was wrong to think he was conning her, I have a feeling she was conning him.  

Edited December 13, 2015 by Neurochick

[Cherrio]

The question I have is what is Devar planning to do for work in Pa?   

 

No one forced Melanie to spend all her money, but at the same time Devar was fine with her supporting him before he even left for the states.  I have a problem with that.  He should of wanted, the key word is wanted.....to keep working right up until he left.  He contributed nothing to living expenses, the wedding or even a ring for her.   That does not speak well of him imo.

          Unless Melanie told him you never have to work, which she did not......he should be contributing/supporting their household and her.

 I do not think she conned him.   I think Devar figured he will have himself a little adventure and charm his way thru it.

      I think Melanie is caught up on an endorphin high.    Only time will tell.

[cooksdelight]

Devar's reason for quitting work was that he had to sign a 6-month contract, and instead sat around for 4 months while Melanie paid him. Why not work anyway, then leave, telling the boss that it's an emergency, he has to go to the U.S. right now. Or, maybe his boss would have let him work without a contract, given the circumstances.

It seems they wanted to be on the show so badly, they used the shooting schedule for their wedding plans. And Devar found his sugar momma in the process. Or so he thought.

[nlkm9]

I wonder if the show pays for any travel or wedding expenses? I actually think Devar did well for himself...she has what sounds like a pretty good job and he is fairly close to his mom, and he is definitely attracted to her...I think of Dani and Mo and of Mark ::::shudder::: and his fishlips and seriously, Devar hit the jackpot.

[cooksdelight]

I wonder if the show pays for any travel or wedding expenses? I actually think Devar did well for himself...she has what sounds like a pretty good job and he is fairly close to his mom, and he is definitely attracted to her...I think of Dani and Mo and of Mark ::::shudder::: and his fishlips and seriously, Devar hit the jackpot.

No, they do not. It's why you see different-sized weddings based on what the families can afford.

[RCharter]

I feel the Melanie led Devar to think she was well off, better off than she actually was.  Maybe that's why Devar said he'd sent 90% of his money home, because he thought Melanie had money to burn.  I mean what working person can take all those trips to Jamaica?  Melanie has blown her savings and now wants Devar to contribute.  Dr. Phil was wrong to think he was conning her, I have a feeling she was conning him.  

Oh yes :)

 

But seriously, I think you're absolutely right.  She is giving him money and taking constantly trips to Jamaica and staying in nice hotels, what else is he supposed to think?  And if she did all this knowing that it was leaving her functionally broke than she did it in order to convince him she had money -- which means that she was purposefully misleading him.  I might understand staying in a nice hotel when you visit Jamaica, maybe its dangerous in the bad parts (I once saw a locked up abroad about Jamaica).  But she could have stayed at a mid level, nice hotel after the 2nd time.  And she certainly didn't have to send him money unless she was trying to mislead him.

Devar's reason for quitting work was that he had to sign a 6-month contract, and instead sat around for 4 months while Melanie paid him. Why not work anyway, then leave, telling the boss that it's an emergency, he has to go to the U.S. right now. Or, maybe his boss would have let him work without a contract, given the circumstances.

It seems they wanted to be on the show so badly, they used the shooting schedule for their wedding plans. And Devar found his sugar momma in the process. Or so he thought.

Oh please, what are they going to do if he breaks the contract?  They can't make him work, so what are they going to sue him for, Melanie's money?  Money he doesn't have?  It would cost them more to sue him than they would ever get out of him.  I believe its what they call being "judgment proof"  

 

Pffft....6 month contract....

[Neurochick]

But seriously, I think you're absolutely right.  She is giving him money and taking constantly trips to Jamaica and staying in nice hotels, what else is he supposed to think?  And if she did all this knowing that it was leaving her functionally broke than she did it in order to convince him she had money -- which means that she was purposefully misleading him.  I might understand staying in a nice hotel when you visit Jamaica, maybe its dangerous in the bad parts (I once saw a locked up abroad about Jamaica).  But she could have stayed at a mid level, nice hotel after the 2nd time.  And she certainly didn't have to send him money unless she was trying to mislead him.

 

 

I think that Melanie was "fronting."  She wanted Devar to think she had money.   If I met a man from a rich country and he constantly came to see me, bought me gifts and never told me that he wasn't well off; I'd assume he was well off.  Then if I came to his country and he said, "now you have to contribute," I'd be like, "that's not what you led me to believe."  I think Melanie was buying Devar gifts too.  

 

No one forced Melanie to spend all her money, but at the same time Devar was fine with her supporting him before he even left for the states.  I have a problem with that.  He should of wanted, the key word is wanted.....to keep working right up until he left.

 

 

Maybe, but we don't know what she told him when she was with him in Jamaica.  The thing is, Jamaica is a poorer country than the US.  If someone from a wealthier country told someone from a poor country that they'll support them, why shouldn't they let them?

[MrsSmartyPants]

I think that Melanie was "fronting."  She wanted Devar to think she had money.   If I met a man from a rich country and he constantly came to see me, bought me gifts and never told me that he wasn't well off; I'd assume he was well off.  Then if I came to his country and he said, "now you have to contribute," I'd be like, "that's not what you led me to believe."  I think Melanie was buying Devar gifts too.  

 

 

Maybe, but we don't know what she told him when she was with him in Jamaica.  The thing is, Jamaica is a poorer country than the US.  If someone from a wealthier country told someone from a poor country that they'll support them, why shouldn't they let them?

 

 

I agree with the bolded, except for one thing - What if the support dries up?   I mean, I can offer to pay your bills and give you spending money ... then next month say "oh, you know what? I think you need a smaller apartment"   - look at Mark he took Nikki dress shopping, promised to buy her whatever dress she liked - she picked an INCREDIBLY moderately priced dress, then he says "oh no! sorry.  Too much".

 

If Devar was smart, he would have kept working - even if Mel was sending money.  Like Dr Phil's goofy ass said "so? the problem would be to have too much money?".  

 

It reminds me of Eddie Murphy's stand up where he talked about Johnny Carson and his wife.  How the wife would hand him her paycheck for like $30 and be like "here, Johnny, put it with the rest" of his billions.  

 

[Neurochick]

I get that, except I think Johnny Carson's wife was from the US, not a poor country.  Also if Melanie acted like Ms Moneybags, why would Devar think the support would dry up?