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Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


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47 minutes ago, Marigold said:

My mom died of cancer and statements like Cathy's always rub me th wrong way. Like my mom wasn't worth a miracle too?  We prayed and prayed and prayed. She had the best team of doctors in NYC and she still died.  

BTW, I am a Christian but am careful how I word things and what I say because it leaves the other person wondering "well, what the heck happened to me???"

Marigold, I always enjoy your perspective! And I totally agree…saying something like that is a huge slap in the face to all of those who have suffered painful, excruciating losses of those they dearly loved…not just to cancer, but to any untimely death. But it is totally consistent with their brand of fundamentalism; we're the best, everyone else sucks, sayeth the Lord. 

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6 minutes ago, Arwen Evenstar said:

They posted a picture of one of The Howlers cuddling a kitten recently...no doubt an attempt at the backlash for trying to run over a cat with a sled.

Poor kitty. But if they won't remove the kids from that home there's little hope for the kitty. 

That was Derrick "driving", right? Just when I was thinking that he might be a good escape... 

Duggars, et al, are really good a killing hope.

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1 hour ago, Marigold said:

My mom died of cancer and statements like Cathy's always rub me th wrong way. Like my mom wasn't worth a miracle too?  We prayed and prayed and prayed. She had the best team of doctors in NYC and she still died.  

BTW, I am a Christian but am careful how I word things and what I say because it leaves the other person wondering "well, what the heck happened to me???"

My sympathies for your mom.

 

It's funny how God let countless generations of people with NHL die, then suddenly started showering miracles on them when science came up with viable treatments. Amazing.

 

On another note, name Cathy's book. I'm thinking:

Gotta Pay For Retirement Somehow

When Satan Attacks

The Girl No One Wanted, Except Jesus

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On 6/6/2016 at 4:10 PM, Aja said:

If Cathy did know Jill did that, it's a trifle odd that she would neglect to mention to Jill that she found her birth mother when she was 27 years old, and her birth mother didn't want anything to do with her. All signs point to disingenuous (at best) grab for attention/TV show.

I agree with those who think that maybe they really wanted the other people in the extended family, and/or were thinking that maybe as she aged and neared death herself, Cathy's birth mom would soften her stance.  

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1 hour ago, queenanne said:

I agree with those who think that maybe they really wanted the other people in the extended family, and/or were thinking that maybe as she aged and neared death herself, Cathy's birth mom would soften her stance.  

There is logic in what you're saying which is why I'm pretty sure that isn't what happened.

I think that Jill may just be that unaware of other people, and the realities of the world. The idea that Cathy's birth mother might well have had real and valid reasons for not wanting to meet Cathy may just not compute for her. 

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(edited)

I think that Jill may just be that unaware of other people, and the realities of the world. The idea that Cathy's birth mother might well have had real and valid reasons for not wanting to meet Cathy may just not compute for her.

Yes, this.  Why wouldn't anyone want to meet the spawn of the great Jill Duggar Dillard?  The narcissism doesn't fall far from the tree.  And don't get me started on using her giant baby as a pawn for doing this.  I despise it when people do that with their kids.  Your child can't speak in full sentences and doesn't have the cognitive ability to understand complex family relationships and thus has shown no desire to meet his great grandmother.  *You* want to, no doubt for your own selfish reasons, Jill.  Stop using your giant baby as a freaking prop.  Also, if this person had met Cathy in the past and wanted no contact, then changed her mind, wouldn't she reach out to Cathy?  Wouldn't good manner dictate that you leave the poor woman alone and stop inserting yourself and your grubby family and your desire to keep your lame-ass show on basic cable on the air into her life?  Oh, that's right, I said "good manners", which means that doesn't apply to the Duggars.

Edited by Lemur
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45 minutes ago, Lemur said:

 

Yes, this.  Why wouldn't anyone want to meet the spawn of the great Jill Duggar Dillard?  The narcissism doesn't fall far from the tree.  And don't get me started on using her giant baby as a pawn for doing this.  I despise it when people do that with their kids.  Your child can't speak in full sentences and doesn't have the cognitive ability to understand complex family relationships and thus has shown no desire to meet his great grandmother.  *You* want to, no doubt for your own selfish reasons, Jill.  Stop using your giant baby as a freaking prop.  Also, if this person had met Cathy in the past and wanted no contact, then changed her mind, wouldn't she reach out to Cathy?  Wouldn't good manner dictate that you leave the poor woman alone and stop inserting yourself and your grubby family and your desire to keep your lame-ass show on basic cable on the air into her life?  Oh, that's right, I said "good manners", which means that doesn't apply to the Duggars.

SO MUCH! Reminds me of an ex sister in law...on my ex niece's first birthday, the poor baby was sicker than a dog, fever, snotty, dark circles under her eyes, but my ex sister in law made her stay up until like 10 pm (to accommodate the work schedules of the parents) and dress up and sit in her high chair with a cake in front of her and a stupid hat on so my ex sister in law could take cute pictures to post. My ex niece was nodding off and pitching forward and coughing her little baby cough. It was infuriating. I just get the same ugly feeling off of all the Duggar mothers, starting with MEchelle, that children are really just props to get attention and bolster this ridiculous cult that they devote their souls to. 

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17 hours ago, JoanArc said:

 

On another note, name Cathy's book. I'm thinking:

Gotta Pay For Retirement Somehow

When Satan Attacks

The Girl No One Wanted, Except Jesus

My Son Married A Reality Famewhore And I Got A Book Deal

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(edited)

Cathy and Derick are similiar.

At first, Derick looked pretty normal! College degree and has had a few jobs. We were hopeful! Then...we find out Derick is a kook. A drifter and grifter. 

Cathy seemed pretty together...she worked at a real job and had a college degree (?). Seemed pretty mainstream.  Cathy is a litle nutty too.  However, she did battle for her life against cancer so I will lay off her...cancer turns your entire world upsidedown.  But she is starting to fit more with the Duggars than what we all thought. 

Edited by Marigold
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2 minutes ago, Marigold said:

Cathy and Derick are similiar.

At first, Derick looked pretty normal! College degree and has had a few jobs. We were hopeful! Then...we find out Derick is a kook. A drifter and grifter. 

Cathy seemed pretty together...she worked at a real job and had a college degree (?). Seemed pretty mainstream.  Cathy is a litle nutty too.  However, she did battle for her life against cancer so I will lay off her...cancer turns your entire world upsidedown.  But she is starting to fit more with the Duggars than what we all thought. 

Even worse, I am pretty sure Cathy has a Masters degree, which would explain why she didn't have kids until she was in her early 30's, despite having married Rick around 1984. This would have also been the exact time she found her birth mother, which makes total sense. Even if she wasn't planning on kids right away, she now had the man to procreate with, and at the time may have just wanted to know about family history of disease, etc. She may have just been a regular" Christian at that time; putting off having kids indicates she was most likely on birth control for several years. But we know she had *some* faith with her comment to Mechelle about using the bible as a "manual" with which to raise her kids. I just doubt it was used as a sledgehammer, as it was in the Duggar household. 

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57 minutes ago, Marigold said:

Cathy and Derick are similiar.

At first, Derick looked pretty normal! College degree and has had a few jobs. We were hopeful! Then...we find out Derick is a kook. A drifter and grifter. 

Cathy seemed pretty together...she worked at a real job and had a college degree (?). Seemed pretty mainstream.  Cathy is a litle nutty too.  However, she did battle for her life against cancer so I will lay off her...cancer turns your entire world upsidedown.  But she is starting to fit more with the Duggars than what we all thought. 

It's the Duggar effect...well documented in Monty Pythons sketch.."St. Looney Up the Cream Bun and Jam". Once you've been Duggared, you take on their behavior.

I've posted it before but it funny as hell.  You have to sit through like the first minute before it gets really weird. Really pokes fun at fringe out there religious groups and how they attract members.

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Someday I think we all may be surprised by Jill.  I think Jill may be the first Duggar offspring to crack.  Jill is the one who did everything right, wholesome, godly even.  God owes her an easy life, dang it!  So far she's ended up living in a foreign country married to a stranger trying to manage relationships she doesn't understand, ie her in laws.  This is not what her beloved Mom and Pops told her would happen if she carried on the cause.  I think Jilly Is is feeling an absolute tremendous amount of pressure right now and is acting out in odd ways.

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5 hours ago, flyingdi said:

Someday I think we all may be surprised by Jill.  I think Jill may be the first Duggar offspring to crack.  Jill is the one who did everything right, wholesome, godly even.  God owes her an easy life, dang it!  So far she's ended up living in a foreign country married to a stranger trying to manage relationships she doesn't understand, ie her in laws.  This is not what her beloved Mom and Pops told her would happen if she carried on the cause.  I think Jilly Is is feeling an absolute tremendous amount of pressure right now and is acting out in odd ways.

I think that you have an interesting point here. Jill isn't prepared for any of this.

Marriage isn't just about producing babies, and she really doesn't know that. There is a degree of emotional maturity necessary for marriage -- the emotional intimacy, the give and take, the negotiation, etc. There is a reason why we don't allow tweens to marry, and Jill has the emotional maturity of a 13 year old girl.

She has essentially no support system. She has no friends, her parents are useless, and I don't believe that the siblings are close. They say that they are close -- because that's what their parents tell them to say -- but I think that JB and J'chelle run a mini-police state where everyone has to watch their back every minute, and every kid would gladly tattle on a sibling for parental approval.

She has never been away from her family for even a minute -- except, maybe at JTTH. She has never even spent a day away at school or work, or spent the night with a friend, or been to sleep-away camp.

While Derick and Cathy may be far-out right-wing evangelicals to us, they aren't Gothardites. Derick hasn't memorized all of the Wisdom booklets, and probably doesn't follow all of the rules.

I would bet that it is all pretty overwhelming for Jill.

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Why is Jill so stunted emotionally? She really does act like a pre-teen. Yet, Joy, Jessa and Jana have been just as sheltered and seem less childish than Jill. It's not the move to Danger America, because she was like that during the courtship and when they lived in the McMansion.  

If anything, having a viewing audience watch immature Jill would just attract those guys who needed an idiot wife to keep enslaved, while deterring any ambitious or mature men from calling on Jizm Bob (thanks Churchie for the name). 

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24 minutes ago, sometimesy said:

Why is Jill so stunted emotionally? She really does act like a pre-teen. Yet, Joy, Jessa and Jana have been just as sheltered and seem less childish than Jill. It's not the move to Danger America, because she was like that during the courtship and when they lived in the McMansion.  

If anything, having a viewing audience watch immature Jill would just attract those guys who needed an idiot wife to keep enslaved, while deterring any ambitious or mature men from calling on Jizm Bob (thanks Churchie for the name). 

I think Jill is more emotionally stunted than her sisters cause Jill is a true believer.  Jill bought into everything her parents and religion taught her.  I don't think the other girls did as much, especially Jesse and Joy.

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(edited)
On June 9, 2016 at 3:29 PM, flyingdi said:

I think Jill is more emotionally stunted than her sisters cause Jill is a true believer.  Jill bought into everything her parents and religion taught her.  I don't think the other girls did as much, especially Jesse and Joy.

 

On June 9, 2016 at 4:55 PM, Missy Vixen said:

Trauma and abuse.

There, I said it.

I think you're both right. However, I also don't remember seeing (or hearing about) Jill being quite so immature pre-Derrick. I think Jill, in her early 20s, had no frame of reference for dealing with feelings of physical and emotional affection so she acted the way most girls do when they have their first taste of that... at 12-15. Why is she still acting this way now? I assume Derrick enjoyed Jill's childish infatuation at first and now that has worn off he doesn't have the skills to ask Jill to behave more age-appropriately (or being a bit of an awkward kook himself, may not actually mind so much) and Jill, again, doesn't have anything to compare more mature relationships to other than her parents and Josh which is a big old ew!

 

As for Jessa, I don't think she was looking for Prince Charming or a "Til There Was You" moment as much as a decently attractive guy who would satisfy her father's specifications and take her the Hell away from raising other people's children. Bin ticked her boxes and off she went. 

Edited by satrunrose
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No one will do that. If someone tells her that she isn't acting sufficiently Christian for their taste - someone in her Gothard circle - THEN she might grow the fuck up. Until then, she thinks she's doing just peachy. 

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Jill might just be like that. I work with a woman, who was raised conventionally, went to normal public schools, is married with two kids, and recently turned 48. She blushes and giggles, and dotes on her husband, and always talked about difficult and full-on everything was with her kids, even though neither of them were special needs at all, and her mother took them whenever she needed to shop or go out.

Some women, regardless of upbringing or personal experience, just hang onto the wide-eyed, childish persona. 20 years from now, even if they escape from the Cult, Jill may still be a stunted, clingy little girl, because that's just who she is, and was always going to be.

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On June 9, 2016 at 10:38 PM, Marigold said:

i think Derick loves Silly Jilly. 

He is a kook and couldn't get a real woman so he chose an immature kidult. 

Yes he's a kook and so is she.  He's happy to have someone and she is too.  Aaaaaaaaaand she got to escape all her jurisdictions and sister mom duties. She can get up when she wants, eat what she wants and go places on her own if she so chooses. It must feel pretty weird after all these rules.

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7 hours ago, Arwen Evenstar said:

Yes he's a kook and so is she.  He's happy to have someone and she is too.  Aaaaaaaaaand she got to escape all her jurisdictions and sister mom duties. She can get up when she wants, eat what she wants and go places on her own if she so chooses. It must feel pretty weird after all these rules.

Who thinks Jilly actually goes anywhere on her own?

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32 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

Who thinks Jilly actually goes anywhere on her own?

Silly me! I thought maybe she'd stay close to home to shop at a bodega or a fruit stand or walk to the school where she reads the Bible in English. It's not a good idea to stroll too far by oneself, but this is Barnacle Jill who won't let Derick poop in peace.

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5 minutes ago, Kokapetl said:

1. Jill is pregnant???

2. I don't really think that most people refer to regular muslims a radical jihadists, But then again Derrick and I probably run in very different circles...so uhh I guess thats pretty progressive of him?

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50 minutes ago, yogi2014L said:

1. Jill is pregnant???

2. I don't really think that most people refer to regular muslims a radical jihadists, But then again Derrick and I probably run in very different circles...so uhh I guess thats pretty progressive of him?

He could be saying the guy was a faithful Muslim, not a jihadist extremist. 

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(edited)

I tend to think that this nutjob was working alone but obviously had some extremist beliefs. I guess we'll find out whether or not he ever had any real connections with real jihadists. 

Edited by Sew Sumi
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It's a depressing state of affairs. The lone nutcase in the Sydney Lindt Cafe had a pump action sawn off shotgun. The Pulse nightclub nutcase had an AR 15! 2 died in Sydney (1 was possibly friendly fire), 50 died in Orlando!  

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On June 9, 2016 at 11:38 PM, Marigold said:

i think Derick loves Silly Jilly. 

He is a kook and couldn't get a real woman so he chose an immature kidult. 

Derrick has got to be one of the shyest and most passive males I've ever seen. IMO, he didn't even choose Jill. I think he had extremely limited social contact with women before "meeting" Jill on Skype. I don't think he dated AT ALL before her. Not that he actually "dated" Jill, of course. He didn't even have to introduce himself to her - in person - at any point. The awkward portion of Derrick's courtship wasn't with Jill - it was with Boob. In my thinking, that says a lot.

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33 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

Easy answer: Boob even said it was because they both "have a heart for missions." Done! 

"Horse teeth and the mind of a 12 year old, but she'll never question you either. Plus you'll be famous. Guaranteed virgin too! Except for this situation..."

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I saw those tweets (though I am not on Twitter).  Did he clarify his statement about Muslims? Where there comments? I was hoping he was saying all Muslims are not terrorist but you never know with these folks.  

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23 hours ago, yogi2014L said:

1. Jill is pregnant???

2. I don't really think that most people refer to regular muslims a radical jihadists, But then again Derrick and I probably run in very different circles...so uhh I guess thats pretty progressive of him?

Do you live in the South? I do and there are a lot of people here in my neck of the woods who think all Muslims are terrorists just waiting for the call to jihad. 

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1 hour ago, Clemgo3165 said:

Do you live in the South? I do and there are a lot of people here in my neck of the woods who think all Muslims are terrorists just waiting for the call to jihad. 

Sadly, I'm sure this is probably true. But it's not just the South. And they're hillbillies - all of them. No matter what their level of education.

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1 hour ago, Clemgo3165 said:

Do you live in the South? I do and there are a lot of people here in my neck of the woods who think all Muslims are terrorists just waiting for the call to jihad. 

Ah no, I live in the suburbs of Chicago. That may explain it.

But maybe we gave him too much credit in his tweet, it could be interpreted either way IMO

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On 6/13/2016 at 4:29 PM, JoanArc said:

"Horse teeth and the mind of a 12 year old, but she'll never question you either. Plus you'll be famous. Guaranteed virgin too! Except for this situation..."

He had a pulse, a penis, a job, and didn't mind Jim Boob's interference -- oops, "Godly counsel". Done!

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Quote

and didn't mind Jim Boob's interference

Didn't mind? Derick has no distinct personality, just a constellation of 'good boy' Christian traits. It's like he's bad performance art.

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