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S02.E01: The Day of the Beast / S02.E02 Caraquet


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An attempt is made to rescue Jamie and a leopard with DNA that may hold the key to curing the animal crisis in the first half of this combined Season 2 premiere. In the second half, a shocking mutation is discovered, which puts a member of the team at risk.

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8 hours ago, Tara Ariano said:
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An attempt is made to rescue Jamie and a leopard with DNA that may hold the key to curing the animal crisis in the first half of this combined Season 2 premiere. In the second half, a shocking mutation is discovered, which puts a member of the team at risk.

Umm, so no mention of escaping the herd o' animals from downtown Washington, D.C.  None at all.

Jamie is trapped on an island with a leopard -- just fucking sail to the island with a tranquilizer gun, pop the leopard, save Jamie and you are done.  Unless there are surly tuna or cantankerous whales in the waters off the island, what is this "attempt" nonsense ?

The team discovers another mutation -- it has to be a pretty fucking awesome mutation to even be considered "shocking" to one up the bears with exoskeletons in Paris.  Yeah, that happened last season.

Edited by ottoDbusdriver
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I thought they were going right back for Jamie but instead they're flying hither and yon, Argentina?

Good stuff so far:

Everyone taking off after the car crashed and leaving Jackson to fend for himself.  He'll be OK!

James Wolk took off his shirt within the first 15 minutes.

Jamie pushing the box with the leopard down the cellar stairs so it broke open.  Oops!

Jamie being attacked by a buffalo!

Mitch refusing the leave New Brunswick without Jamie and sitting down like a three year old having a temper tantrum and then being physically dragged by Abe.

Mitch has more temper tantrums and storms off!  Then he's back! I am enjoying the nicknames he's coming up with for everyone.  The family dog rated a mention too.

Jackson can't turn into one of those things...he's too pretty.

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(edited)

The mutation has mutated again and Jackson is bitten. Now the race is on to find the cure for him before he becomes an animal zombie... a Zoombie! A Zoombie with bad lipstick!

Yes I will leave the room now in shame.

Edited by redfish
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Jamie is the dumbest person on the planet!  You leave shelter and relative safety.  Plus people are looking for you at that location.  Ugh.  I want to go through my TV and shake her.  

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Jamie stepped on a nail?? LOL. 

Wasn't she boarding up the windows in the house she left?  Why?  So the dead guy wouldn't get eaten?  She didn't board up that cute little marsupial type creature did she?  I thought he'd go with her, riding in her pack or something.

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a Zoombie!

Perfect!  They're calling on the radio don't you know.

OMG Killer Raccoons!! Eeek!

Edited by raven
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20 minutes ago, redfish said:

The mutation has mutated again and Jackson is bitten. Now the race is on to find the cure for him before he becomes an animal zombie... a Zoombie! A Zoombie with bad lipstick!

Yes I will leave the room now in shame.

Now he'll turn into an abbey from Wayward Pines.

19 minutes ago, lovebug871 said:

Jamie is the dumbest person on the planet!  You leave shelter and relative safety.  Plus people are looking for you at that location.  Ugh.  I want to go through my TV and shake her.  

But it's "more fun" to randomly wander around to make signs along the way.

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So this thread is open during the episode... are live posts during the episode verboten here or just if the thread is locked.  Because if any series ever need a live thread, its this one.  There is just so much hokiness in acting and dialogue that I can't retain it and would be better to snark on in the moment.

So lets start with Billy Burke, physical comedian.  I've been hit by a Rhino in a car and I'm limping (was he limping last season?).  Or the hand in pocket limp swagger that led to the odd 'urban myth' conversation.  Or when he sat his ass on the ground in the middle of a coming stampede and declared he wasn't leaving like a five year old.  I don't want to listen to you Jackson Spoonman.

So what is the logic in Jackson and Chloe deciding to keep his infection to themselves?  Aren't they supposed to be studying and stopping the spread of the mutating mutation.  Shouldn't they at least be telling the team.  Maybe tests as it progressed would be helpful?

Its kind of comical that they promised to go after Jamie to keep Mitch working for them but now every few conversations they are all about not having resources right now and everybody is fine with that.

What don't I remember about season 1 that led to the bubble bath fight.  Never mind, explained... It was the temper tantrum from an hour ago.

Do birds crap acid rain now?

Did they seriously just say that looks like an elephant bite?  Never mind, I'm distracted by Zombies.

OK, not zombies.  But when they showed the vulture carrying the body away I thought it was two vultures joined at the butt so they could quickly reverse direction.  One always going forward and one backward and 360 degree vision.  Evolution.  And they secreted of waste via sweat because their butts are blocked off and that explained the acid rain.  So storing up food, kind of a let down. 

Elephants can run 25 mph, so evolutionary trait super speed.

I doubt you show, but I'm wrong.  Seeding clouds to make it rain bird vomit and blood.  Snerk.

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The two vultures carrying that body..I had to rewind, it was so, so funny.

Then elephant ass!  Lots of elephant ass!

15 minutes ago, ParadoxLost said:

Because if any series ever need a live thread, its this one. 

Sadly, I would be up for this. 

Well, someone with this show has been reading the internet because we got LOTS of animal attacks and bonus insect attacks.  Hopefully they didn't blow their budget on these two eps.  Though of course because the infects are infected, gotta scratch the mosquito plan.  We've still got plankton though!

That woman covered with bees in the first hour....shouldn't she have been screaming in pain or something?  She just calmly hands her baby off to Chloe.  Maybe the bees just wanted to hang out?

Am I crazy (I do watch Zoo) but there was only one mention of Reiden Global and NONE of mother cell or defiant pupil?  Ah, the good old days.

Ooh I just remembered - didn't Jackson say killing the animals was murder?  Cuz he's turning into a zoombie?? Maybe he's changing his tune after seeing Thomas-might-as-well-have-worn-a-red-shirt get squished by an elephant.

And do we have a love interest for Abe now?

Edited by raven
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(edited)

Wow !!!  Just wow !!!  That was so bad -- I can't believe that there are actual writers that get paid to turn this out.  

I laughed through most of it -- Frenchy McBugeyes and the baby, all the animals in the D.C. zoo breaking out at the same time, the asinine behavior of Jamie and her walk through the woods (since when have there ever been bison in New Brunswick), Jackson being ignored by the tiger after the tiger sniffed that he had the virus, the vultures seeding clouds with blood and bile, an African elephant in Patagonia -- it just went on and on with the level of stupidity

And the stupidest of all -- despite animals attacking all over the world, people still going camping in the woods in South America only to be killed by the first human mutation.

Edited by ottoDbusdriver
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2 minutes ago, ottoDbusdriver said:

Wow !!!  Just wow !!!  That was so bad -- I can't believe that there are actual writers that get paid to turn this out.  

I find it entertaining because its pretty clear that they are doing a lot of it on purpose.  There are just too many lines that are intentionally idiotic.

The mutation is...is mutating.  (Someone get a thesaurus.).

The you follow us, you follow us exchange.

The urban myth conversation.

I swear that Chloe said something like.  You are completely fine, but your blood type changed.  A little, the surgery went great but the patient died going on there.

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1 minute ago, ParadoxLost said:

I find it entertaining because its pretty clear that they are doing a lot of it on purpose.  There are just too many lines that are intentionally idiotic.

The mutation is...is mutating.  (Someone get a thesaurus.).

The you follow us, you follow us exchange.

The urban myth conversation.

I swear that Chloe said something like.  You are completely fine, but your blood type changed.  A little, the surgery went great but the patient died going on there.

Don't get me wrong, it is most certainly entertaining but for all the wrong reasons.

And a plane that big would most certainly have more than one pilot.

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I find it entertaining because its pretty clear that they are doing a lot of it on purpose

The veterinary pathologist sat down, crossed his arms and refused to leave.  He had to be picked up and bodily removed.  Shirley they can't be serious?

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14 minutes ago, ottoDbusdriver said:

...Jackson being ignored by the tiger after the tiger sniffed that he had the virus...

This is silly. It seems to prove that Jackson is now animal repellent (unless he sticks a giant needle in it's haunch), but he doesn't share this with Billy Burke's character. Hmph.

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17 minutes ago, ottoDbusdriver said:

And the stupidest of all -- despite animals attacking all over the world, people still going camping in the woods in South America only to be killed by the first human mutation.

Just when I thought Jamie needed to die for being stupid enough to leave shelter and then leave her water bottle OPEN (while oblivious to a herd of giant hissing cockroaches that would have scared me FAR more than any bison), she is outdone by the rest of the team when...

THEY BURIED THE RADIOS!

Seriously? WTF? They BURIED the perfectly good working radios that were tuned to a special channel that they could all use?

These people ALL deserve to die... even Abe, sad to say....

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1 hour ago, ottoDbusdriver said:

Wow !!!  Just wow !!!  That was so bad -- I can't believe that there are actual writers that get paid to turn this out.  

I laughed through most of it -- Frenchy McBugeyes and the baby, all the animals in the D.C. zoo breaking out at the same time, the asinine behavior of Jamie and her walk through the woods (since when have there ever been bison in New Brunswick), Jackson being ignored by the tiger after the tiger sniffed that he had the virus, the vultures seeding clouds with blood and bile, an African elephant in Patagonia -- it just went on and on with the level of stupidity

And the stupidest of all -- despite animals attacking all over the world, people still going camping in the woods in South America only to be killed by the first human mutation.

I don't believe there are actual scripts, it all feels ad libbed for how they make things up like Under the Dumb did by making stuff up.

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4 minutes ago, Free said:

I don't believe there are actual scripts, it all feels ad libbed for how they make things up like Under the Dumb did by making stuff up.

For starters, there was also an episode of 'Under the Dome' were it also rained down red rain, and it was also acidic in nature, so much so that it burned people's skin but left all the plant life completely intact (unlike here).  So maybe they are just ripping off the ideas directly from UtD -- if Pauline Rennie shows up with her shitty art predicting the future, I'm out.  <sarcasm>

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4 minutes ago, ottoDbusdriver said:

For starters, there was also an episode of 'Under the Dome' were it also rained down red rain, and it was also acidic in nature, so much so that it burned people's skin but left all the plant life completely intact (unlike here).  So maybe they are just ripping off the ideas directly from UtD -- if Pauline Rennie shows up with her shitty art predicting the future, I'm out.  <sarcasm>

It's just sad that there are any similarities at all.

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3 hours ago, ottoDbusdriver said:

 

And a plane that big would most certainly have more than one pilot.

Hopefully that plane has some kind of defense system for if they run into swarms of killer birds.. 

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11 hours ago, ottoDbusdriver said:

Wow !!!  Just wow !!!  That was so bad -- I can't believe that there are actual writers that get paid to turn this out.  

I'm starting to think the show is a joke, especially with the tiger sniffing Jackson and saying, "whatever" and walking over him, kind of like a cat (BTW, where are the cats?).

Will we see killer cockroaches next?

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(edited)

So glad this is back, and on the same night as Containment, because nothing beats an hour of stupid other than two hours of stupid!

Jamie rescue attempts are doomed to failure, unsurprisingly, so, they promise Mitch to return for her, but head off to Argentina instead.  Meanwhile, Jamie hides under a log.  A special, magic log that prevents wolves from following her scent and finding her.

To get to Argentina they fly in a plane that looks as fat as a hippo which, despite it's size, nobody has ever even heard of.  In Argentina they spot a heffalump, a zit-faced, mutating mutant, and corbeaus as big as condors.  Jamie crawls out from under the log, because days have probably gone past by now, and after all that time cooped up under a log, no doubt she needs to take a dump.

The team escape Argentina in the hippoplaneamus with only one asset to show for their efforts: Zit the mutating mutant.  Plus new team member (presumably) whose name I don't recall.  And who promptly caps Zit, making the entire trip to Argentina a waste of time.

(By the way, I was expecting a Fast'n'Furious endless chase by the heffalump, down the huge, 27 mile runway the hippoplaneamus found out in the woods.  Guess they ddn't think of that, because the Plane the size of Poughkeepsie was off the ground with less takeoff-roll than a Cessna 172!)

And Jamie forsakes the place they know to look for her, and takes to the raccoon and beetle infested woods instead.

Roll on next week!  Now I have to go see whether Officer Aeryn Sun is still locked in a 40-foot container with a dumb-ass cop.

Edited by Netfoot
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This show is hilarious!  I can't wait to watch Jackson keep turning from man to super-predator before our eyes!  I wonder how long it will take the others (besides French lady) to figure out there is something wrong with him.

I'm glad they have the plane, though.  Now I can just handwave how quickly these people hop the globe.

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All I can say is, "Damn! How deliciously awful!"  I had been in a terrible, terrible mood and then I watched Zoo. My face smiled.  I liked every stupid, nonsensical, over the top, under the lowest bar, pure joy of fantastic garbage...minute of it.  The only quibble I had was when the mutated man was running around the airplane.  Can't we just stick with mutated animals other than humans? Guess they have to fill out another season that certainly wasn't needed. Still, I'm glad it's here.  This is one to watch to see all the spaghetti on the wall.

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Wow, that was awesomely bad.  I have to think that the creators have just decided to embrace the utter ridiculousness and are purposely and eagerly going all out Sharknado on us.

I was pleased to see that this season picked right up where it left off, with the Charge of the Animal Brigade, and didn't cop out and just start somewhere anew.

So Jackson is turning into an animal?  He said he got bit by a dog.  The same kind of dog bit Kovacs too?  I chuckled when the show made him take his shirt off within 5 minutes, because I remember all the clamouring for it on the forums last season.  I guess he wanted to get it out of the way early.

I truly cannot stand Flinty Voiced Reporter Lady, and her insta-romance with Acerbic Scientist.  But her actions made zero sense, other than to purposely keep them apart.  She knows the team is on its way to her.  So she leaves the house with the leopard?  I guess she thought the leopard would get eaten if she didn't draw the animals away from the house.  But why then did she just camp out under a log?  And how was it that the animals couldn't smell her?  The team had enough time to land in New Brunswick, do whatever they needed to do, leave, and land back in Washington DC.  She's sitting under that log the whole time?

Then at the end.... ohs noes!  She meets the TV cliche of young man that she is going to develop "feelings" for and keeps her apart from One True Love.  Can it get any more cheesy?

As far as I'm concerned, Jamie can die at anytime.  Couldn't care less about her or Mitch.  If this show was only about Abraham, Jackson, and Chloe, I'd be happier.

I can't recall, but are Jackson and Chloe actually married?  The last episode of last season did some huge jump in time, right?  Did they actually marry?  I seem to recall that in the book (which apart from the names of the characters, has absolutely nothing to do with the show), they get married.

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Am I crazy (I do watch Zoo) but there was only one mention of Reiden Global and NONE of mother cell or defiant pupil?  Ah, the good old days.

I thought I heard Chloe say "mother cell".

Edited by blackwing
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(edited)

I think the mother cell was the source of the first mutation, but now that it's mutated again (and seems to be continually evolving and mutating?), it's worthless.  Just like the leopard.  Which is why they need to find an animal with the new mutation, but that doesn't help because it's still mutating?  That's about as much as I understood (probably incorrectly) of their explanations. Doesn't matter - I'm here for the swarms and zebras!

Anyway, they have Mutating Jackson, so it would appear they really don't need to be going around chasing other animals. 

Edited by izabella
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So if vultures can team up to carry a body, can 2 European swallows carry a coconut ?

This show is the perfect cure for my GoT withdrawal. 

16 hours ago, ottoDbusdriver said:

For starters, there was also an episode of 'Under the Dome' were it also rained down red rain, and it was also acidic in nature, so much so that it burned people's skin but left all the plant life completely intact (unlike here).  So maybe they are just ripping off the ideas directly from UtD -- if Pauline Rennie shows up with her shitty art predicting the future, I'm out.  <sarcasm>

If her beautiful artwork shows up here I will love this show forever.

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This show truly is a worthy successor to "CS-aye-aye-aye Miami".

What CBS really needs to do is re-edit it into a half-hour and insert a laugh track like FOX did with "Ally McBeal".  

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So Jackson is turning into an animal?

Worse. A Manimal except unlike Dr. Jonathan Chase/Simon MacCorkindale, he might not use his powers for good to fight injustice. Probably make it worse and get them all killed.

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Am I crazy (I do watch Zoo) but there was only one mention of Reiden Global and NONE of mother cell or defiant pupil?

You're not the only one.

Okay show I know the world is in chaos but since this is technically Reiden Global's fault why aren't there any scenes of them getting some heat for this? Why aren't the gov't dragging the CEO and all their "best" scientists into this making a new cure? Or at least throw them into the mess and then boom get infected and they have no choice but to make a cure. The world is just going to let them get away with this?

Edited by redfish
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I too, find it odd that Chloe and Jackson are keeping quiet on his transformation.  I predict that wacky hijinks will ensue until Episode 10, when they realise that they could have been doing tests on Jackson all along and using his blood to develop a cure.

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That was a pleasant two hours, because after a minute or two of Zoo I channel surfed and found a Twilight Zone marathon.  TZ was a good show.  Next week ... there are a lot of good books in the world.

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I love that I have seen most of the lead actors in this show in other things and thought they were awesome and on this hot mess they are . . . hot messes.

3 hours ago, blackwing said:

I can't recall, but are Jackson and Chloe actually married?  The last episode of last season did some huge jump in time, right?  Did they actually marry?  I seem to recall that in the book (which apart from the names of the characters, has absolutely nothing to do with the show), they get married.

You know what's fantastic? You couldn't recall if Chloe and Jackson were married and I couldn't recall if they were even dating. God, I missed this stupid show.

I would like to give a special thank you to the makeup people in charge of Jackson's head wound. It bounced around from basically a gaping wound, to a deep cut, to a wound in the shape of an "X", and to a vague scratch the whole damn episode. Really, guys? It is so hard to take a picture of the wound after the first day and . . . . then just replicate that the rest of the time?

I genuinely have no idea how much time passed between the team flying to find Jamie, not finding her, but getting the leopard, and getting back to the plane. Like, I'd imagine that takes at least several hours, but the show made it seem like the whole thing happened in 10 minutes. Also, they are the worst goddamn rescue crew ever. Oh, our rescue target, literally, isn't in our immediate sight. K, BYEEEE!

Oh, and 1,000 facepalms to Jamie. All of these people are dumb, but she is just next level stupid.

1 hour ago, mertensia said:

How could Jackson turning into an animal make this worse? I mean sure Chloe probably won't want to screw him but other than that, hey! Instant specimen! 

Right?! I don't understand why Jackson and Chloe didn't tell Mitch and make him take a million samples from Jackson to try and figure this shit out. Wouldn't finding someone freshly bitten be a good thing? 

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Maybe Jackson's ongoing transformation is already impacting his thinking.  Maybe he's starting to identify with the animals and wants them to win now.  

In any case, French woman should be encouraging him to tell Mitch so Mitch can start doing some research, in real time, as the virus mutates.  She hasn't been infected, so why isn't she bringing this up to Jackson? 

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(edited)
9 hours ago, Netfoot said:

The team escape Argentina in the hippoplaneamus with only one asset to show for their efforts: Zit the mutating mutant.  

Actually, on my TV I could see that he had reptilian scales rather than zits (although at first I too thought boils).

 

And I really hope this is true, although Chloe has no excuse for going along with it except that Jackson is hot and available:

32 minutes ago, izabella said:

Maybe Jackson's ongoing transformation is already impacting his thinking.  Maybe he's starting to identify with the animals and wants them to win now.  

Edited by shapeshifter
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16 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

And I really hope this is true, although Chloe has no excuse for going along with it except that Jackson is hot and available:

I took it as a given that Jackson had turned to the animal's side when he hid the tiger's action, but then I started doubting myself when Chloe started pushing that line of thinking harder.  Maybe Chloe was infected by the bees?

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8 hours ago, izabella said:

I'm glad they have the plane, though.  Now I can just handwave how quickly these people hop the globe.

It's a basically the Zoo version of Agents of SHIELD's 'The Bus' complete with rear vehicle ramp.  And the CGI of the plane is just so bad.

And I loved how Frenchy McBugeyes was just lobbing off shots at the creature/Kovacs/whatever -- they were inside a plane, I'm just surprised she didn't punch multiple holes in the fuselage.

The burying of the completely functioning radios from the Ranger was so incredibly stupid.

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It's a basically the Zoo version of Agents of SHIELD's 'The Bus' complete with rear vehicle ramp.  And the CGI of the plane is just so bad.

Oh god, so the show just like the mothercell has mutated as well into another show.

Edited by redfish
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(edited)

Something weird is happening with the quote, report and like features. If I hover over the area, I get a hand to select quote and stuff but I can't see any icons. I've been randomly clicking and found myself in a reply window with a quote I didn't want and unable to exit it. Nor can I find an "edit" button now that it's posted.

I may have also reported a post or 2 in my efforts to find the hidden (but functioning, apparently) buttons to click. So moderators, if I did report a post or if posts in this thread got reported, it was an accident.

But what's going on with the display?

Edited by slothgirl
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1 hour ago, ParadoxLost said:

I took it as a given that Jackson had turned to the animal's side when he hid the tiger's action, but then I started doubting myself when Chloe started pushing that line of thinking harder.  Maybe Chloe was infected by the bees?

almost posted that too. Or maybe the bees didn't sting her because she was already bitten by another animal with the season 2 mutant strain? 

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