S02.E07: Till Debt Do Us Part

[Tara Ariano]

Quote

Mayur feels pressure to start a family and turns his focus to earning income, which makes Maneka feel lonely; Ben and Vicki fight over finances and things escalate when Ben's car breaks down; and David demands Taylor get a job before she leaves for flight attendant training.

(Normally I would combine two back-to-back episodes in one thread, but since we got a screener for Episode 6 and wrote it up before it got delayed, there will be an editorial post on each episode.)

[ExplainItAgain]

Vicki is much more unlikable now that she's married. I think she's realized what an annoying child she married.

[Primetimer]

Fights about work and money thread through the second hour of an Arranged double-header; your editors choose sides/discuss!

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[Empress1]

Team Ben re: finances. Ten lattes a week is like $200 a month, which is a ton on a student budget. And $62 for a single candle is crazy. Even Vicki and her mother say Vicki spends too much. (But they should get rid of the junker. They live in NYC; she took the subway to meet him out in Far Rockaway. They don't need a car. So I guess I'm team both? Neither?)

Glad Taylor's mother gave her some tough love, and glad David has found his voice a bit. He still needs to dump her ass though. Next week they go to counseling, which they maybe should have done before they got married.

Does Maneka report directly to Mayur? If so, that's totally inappropriate.

Edited June 22, 2016 by Empress1

[Broken Ox]

I really wanted to smack her over that $62 candle. And then she bitches about just having ONE candle. And is she or is she not wearing that wig in public at all times?

[EverybodyIsACritic]

I felt bad for Vicki in the period penalty box last episode, and while she was ridiculous about that $62 candle, I still like her more than Ben and his cash-sucking car. That same car that broke down on the way home for Shabbos (? I hope that spelling is close). I mean, to keep driving when the car is hitching and shuddering and making cartoon-like broken noises? No wonder it's falling apart.

Thank Christ for Taylor's truth-telling mother.  Taylor wants to move into a big house, but hasn't worked in at least the last several months, and picks at David like a dermatologist with a schedule full of blackheads. The date they had at the end was most notable for Taylor's au natural face (which I thought looked younger and prettier than her usual Toddlers and Tiaras Gone Wild) and the fact that my DVR. Cut. Off.  Oh, well.

[BetteC]

1 hour ago, ExplainItAgain said:

Vicki is much more unlikable now that she's married. I think she's realized what an annoying child she married.

She says to various people at various times she really loves him.  I think she has a matter of fact type personality and I think he really is annoying. She's doing all the work and he's just being ... whatever he is being ... she did hand him a screwdriver!! I think they were still in that "time"...

[BetteC]

I thought Vicki gave Ben permission to go ... he was willing not to go if she really didn't want him to. Of course this was the first time they went through this experience so she thought about it after he left ... however, the way they edited it it looked like as soon as he walked out the door she was complaining...

[Lily247]

I only saw a few minutes of this episode.  But I wonder how re Vicki and Ben supporting themselves? $62 candle really ?? Vicki should not have married a yeshiva boy if she wanted fancy shmancy mezuzahs and washing cups and decor. 

[Empress1]

I feel like Vicki and Ben have to be living off parents and/or student loans (and maybe wedding gifts, at this point). Ben said something about how Vicki had put aside money from before they were married and that's what they were living on, but how much could a 21-year-old have put away, that would support them in NYC? Their rent is $2500 a month - that's a lot, especially for two people in their early 20s. Vicki also said she "tried to save money but wasn't very good at it" and everyone in her life says she's shitty at budgeting, so I can't imagine they have much saved.

She's right that when a car starts to nickel and dime you, it usually makes sense to replace it with a newer one - but in their case, they don't need a car. If they lived on Long Island, yes, they'd need one, but they live in Harlem. 

I also wondered how much makeup she was buying that Ben felt like it was eating into their expenses. I totally get finding a product you like and sticking with it, but, like, is foundation a line item in their monthly budget?

[Pepper Mostly]

29 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

She's right that when a car starts to nickel and dime you, it usually makes sense to replace it with a newer one - but in their case, they don't need a car. If they lived on Long Island, yes, they'd need one, but they live in Harlem. 

I also wondered how much makeup she was buying that Ben felt like it was eating into their expenses. I totally get finding a product you like and sticking with it, but, like, is foundation a line item in their monthly budget?

These two drove me crazy. WHY do they have a car in NYC? WHY does she need a $62 candle? WHY do they not have a coffee maker or indeed any kind of wedding gifts, which they could use to decorate and personalize their space?  (If I were getting a wedding gift for a young religious Jewish couple, a mezzuzah would be at the top of the list, for example.) Their apartment is so empty, no books, no photos (except their lonely wedding pic), no personal items. They were eating from paper plates with plastic forks! They have no plates, no cutlery?

If Vicky loves to shop, she needs to learn to love the thrill of the chase--finding the sales, stalking the wild bargain, flea markets, thrift shops, never paying full price. (I love shopping and that's my MO.) When she was clutching at that expensive candle I nearly cried. Honey, the Yankee Candle store is your friend. They have sales all the damn time. This is the hill you want to die on? And really, I'm by no means a fan of Ben, I think he's an overweening, condescending twit, but he was absolutely right about making their own coffee! The money you can save by not getting takeout every day is staggering. Make yourself a cup before you leave the house, and take a travel cup with you to school. Even if you cut back to one a day, that's something. Vanilla latte is not difficult to make! Gah, these two!

Maneka and Mayur are boring to me, though I did laugh when Mayur was going on about how he wanted mansions all over the world and fancy sports cars and to endow a hospital in India and a solid gold toilet and god knows what all else. Doesn't he run a franchise real estate office? Even if its high end real estate, is he anywhere near attaining a fraction of this, ever in his lifetime?

Taylor apparently can't think of something to do with herself all day? Go to a movie, a museum, meet friends for lunch, bake a cake, go for a walk,go to the gym, knit, take a class. If she'd sell that $10,000 pageant dress she'd have some money. I don't get her reasoning for not selling it--does she plan to wear it again? she seemed to think that it needed to be kept because it was expensive, but David's shirts needed to go because they were old or worn out? But David wears the shirts, while she doesn't wear the dress. Girl makes no sense.

[PityFree]

Seriously. Ben's comment on how wearing less makeup would save money made me dislike him even more than I already do - if that is even possible. IDK about Vicky, but most women buy makeup and can use it for months at a time. It is not really an ongoing expense. You can buy expensive stuff or drug store makeup. Plus, Vicky looked like she wears minimal makeup anyway - she is not putting on false eyelashes and eyeliner daily.

Ben's haircuts probably cost way more. I suggest that Ben invest in a "Flowby" and use their vacuum to cut his hair if he thinks cutting back on grooming is the ticket to saving money.

Edited June 22, 2016 by PityFree

[Pepper Mostly]

10 minutes ago, PityFree said:

Ben's haircuts probably cost way more. I suggest that Ben invest in a "Flowby" and use their vacuum to cut his hair if he thinks cutting back on grooming is the ticket to saving money.

Hahahahahaha, I love this. Let's see how quickly Ben backpedals from that idea.

Ben talks to Vicky like a parent talks to a child. He's awful. No wonder she's pushing back.

[Lily247]

What i dont understand is why Ben doesnt have or get a JOB. He is a husband so he has to provide for his wife and any future kids they may have. I am going to assume that Vicki may have gotten an inheritance from a grandparent or something like that, no way do I believe she saved thousands of dollars on her own. Vicki should probably also get a job - nights, afternoons, something. They seem immature to me both of them. 

On the other hand, despite my dislike of Taylor, I thought it was pretty cold and harsh of David to demand why she doesnt have a job for the 3 weeks before she leaves for training. Given that their bills are getting paid, if I were her I would use this time as a last hurrah before work kicks in. However, he may have acted like that to her given the way she treats him, which I would understand. 

[autumnh]

Taylor reminds me of "Six" from Blossom..

She is unbearable to watch and or listen to..I find myself yelling at the tv lol

Vicky & Ben? Why did they even get married? He would have been annoying right off the bat for me. I think she just wanted to get married for the sake of getting married....oh and please...take off those awful Ugg slipper boots!!

[Evil Queen]

1 hour ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Maneka and Mayur are boring to me, though I did laugh when Mayur was going on about how he wanted mansions all over the world and fancy sports cars and to endow a hospital in India and a solid gold toilet and god knows what all else. Doesn't he run a franchise real estate office? Even if its high end real estate, is he anywhere near attaining a fraction of this, ever in his lifetime?

 

I am going to watch this one in a minute here but wanted to say about Mayur and Maneka. The place they work is in a VERY expensive city. It looks like the real estate office they are at ONLY sells in areas that are multi million dollar homes. If there do anything under I can imagine its a here and there thing to fill in gabs or meet a quota for their office. It is a part of a larger company. Its Keller Williams if I am remembering right. They were pushing it the name earlier and push it in interviews they have done as well. My city I live in is next to the one they are in so I know this area well. Plus you can look their names up and find out about the place. They even gave each other Yelp reviews. Which was a joke to me. Now for what he all wants...good luck with mansions all over the world and fancy sports cars and so on...I doubt he is anywhere near having any of that. He isn't the one that owns Keller Williams. He helps run one of their offices from what it sounds like. Yet I can imagine if he was in this job back when the market took a dive that he may have lost on money at that point. It was bad here just like everywhere else. If something like that was to happen again its something to take into account on your spending and what you think you have to have or not. Plus on top of it the real estate agents and companies they work for can be insane here with how competitive they are. There is an overload of them. With being a show like they are, if they come off in bad light in some way, it could tank them if word gets around. As far as I am concerned, even if I had that kind of money, I would NEVER EVER go to them or that office they work in to help buy or sell a place after seeing this show. I feel the same about the Flip or Flop couple too since its here as well. I'd run the other way if I saw their names on something. LOL

[okerry]

1 hour ago, Evil Queen said:

I am going to watch this one in a minute here but wanted to say about Mayur and Maneka. The place they work is in a VERY expensive city. It looks like the real estate office they are at ONLY sells in areas that are multi million dollar homes. If there do anything under I can imagine its a here and there thing to fill in gabs or meet a quota for their office. It is a part of a larger company. Its Keller Williams if I am remembering right. They were pushing it the name earlier and push it in interviews they have done as well. My city I live in is next to the one they are in so I know this area well. Plus you can look their names up and find out about the place. They even gave each other Yelp reviews. Which was a joke to me. Now for what he all wants...good luck with mansions all over the world and fancy sports cars and so on...I doubt he is anywhere near having any of that. He isn't the one that owns Keller Williams. He helps run one of their offices from what it sounds like. Yet I can imagine if he was in this job back when the market took a dive that he may have lost on money at that point. It was bad here just like everywhere else. If something like that was to happen again its something to take into account on your spending and what you think you have to have or not. Plus on top of it the real estate agents and companies they work for can be insane here with how competitive they are. There is an overload of them. With being a show like they are, if they come off in bad light in some way, it could tank them if word gets around. As far as I am concerned, even if I had that kind of money, I would NEVER EVER go to them or that office they work in to help buy or sell a place after seeing this show. I feel the same about the Flip or Flop couple too since its here as well. I'd run the other way if I saw their names on something. LOL

aw, I like Tarek & Christina from *Flip or Flop.* They at least come across as genuine, which is more than I can say for any of the couples on this show!

[Scorpiosunshine]

3 hours ago, PityFree said:

Seriously. Ben's comment on how wearing less makeup would save money made me dislike him even more than I already do - if that is even possible. IDK about Vicky, but most women buy makeup and can use it for months at a time. It is not really an ongoing expense. You can buy expensive stuff or drug store makeup. Plus, Vicky looked like she wears minimal makeup anyway - she is not putting on false eyelashes and eyeliner daily.

Ben's haircuts probably cost way more. I suggest that Ben invest in a "Flowby" and use their vacuum to cut his hair if he thinks cutting back on grooming is the ticket to saving money.

Same here! What a shit-head.

 Really, dude? Ugh!!  While cosmetics are not a necessity, they're sort of "toiletry" items, something most men really don't know much about. They last a long time, and it often pays to get better stuff (though there are plenty of awesome "dupes" out there, too). It was such a weird, dumb, insensitive thing to say. Ben was right about the coffee and he was right about the $62 candle. (They could have gotten a much bigger , nicer, candle for $20, so they still didn't get a deal.) It's Ben's approach that sucks, because he is making plenty of suggestions for Vicky and none for himself. He's attacking her for spending, but she's makes him lunches that he doesn't eat, then he buys lunch. WTF? Fair is fair, Ben. Anytime Vicky came close to making a point about his spending, Ben --once again!!-- changed the conversation/deflected with his "well we don't have to talk about this now ..." comment.

I agree with the poster who mentioned bargain-hunting. One can find amazing deals with really minimum effort, or put in more effort and make out like a bandit. Vicky and Ben can both have their way; they just need to sit down, make a realistic budget, pay themselves, and make sure to include some fun in that budget. They are too young to worry about having the nicest of things, but also too young to worry about dying broke. They are the perfect ages and right stage in life to start preparing for the future AND enjoy the now.  

I will admit --I love to shop. I love clothes. shoes, love nice things for my home,  love seeing the perfect thing for someone and gifting. At the same time, I am in no way materialistic. I could live without ANY of it and be happy.  (I don't shop all the time; I go through phases). I also love to save, am prepared for emergencies,  know how to find good deals, am just fine with delayed-gratification, and love to give others way more than I get for myself. It's OK to spend money and OK to want nice things ... as long as you're real about what's doable and not a slave to it. By the same token, it's not wise to be a slave to the dollar in the opposite direction.  Being hyper-focused on saving and penny-pinching can do just as much harm as overspending. Vicky and Ben need to find the middle-ground, and they both need to be realistic.

Ben seems to be cheap, and Vicky seems to be the opposite. Were they both turning it up for the show? It's possible. I won't lie-- cheap men turn me off. Being cheap just for the sake of it?  No thanks. I don't mean staying within a budget, saving, or even being a little frugal (as long as "frugal" isn't code for "so cheap I leave an embarrassingly small tip").

Edited June 22, 2016 by Scorpiosunshine

[Scorpiosunshine]

1 hour ago, kat12379 said:

What i dont understand is why Ben doesnt have or get a JOB. He is a husband so he has to provide for his wife and any future kids they may have. I am going to assume that Vicki may have gotten an inheritance from a grandparent or something like that, no way do I believe she saved thousands of dollars on her own. Vicki should probably also get a job - nights, afternoons, something. They seem immature to me both of them. 

On the other hand, despite my dislike of Taylor, I thought it was pretty cold and harsh of David to demand why she doesnt have a job for the 3 weeks before she leaves for training. Given that their bills are getting paid, if I were her I would use this time as a last hurrah before work kicks in. However, he may have acted like that to her given the way she treats him, which I would understand. 

I agree --It would be nuts for Taylor to get a job for a few weeks. Taylor is an annoying, childish, hateful person, and she should have discussed her FA job with David first. That being said, he probably would have nixed it right away, so I imagine she knew exactly what she was doing by holding back. Though she handled it all wrong, in my opinion, she should take the job. He needs to think about it - this could help put them on the way to a better financial future.

FA is a good job. My friends who did it all loved it, made great money, had great benefits, and really enjoyed the job. (Most of them had prior F&B (food and beverage) and/or customer service experience. As for training, IIRC, the training/school took place after they were hired and lasted for about 6 weeks.)  This is a good chance for them to save a lot of money, get a nice, more comfortable space, and get some space from each other.  I can't stand Taylor, but this is a good opportunity; I think they would be nuts to let it go.

 

**sorry for the double post! I messed up!**

Edited June 22, 2016 by Scorpiosunshine

[Evil Queen]

UGH I had this whole thing all typed out and my computer started being weird and for some reason it wasn't here when I got back like it has been in the past. So to try to redo this now...

Glad Taylor's mom said stuff to her on her behavior and that it will cost her if she doesn't mellow out. David though telling her to find a job was stupid IMO. Most places are not going to want someone for only a few weeks until they go off to the job they already had taken. Sure she should haven't applied for it with out discussing that with him but its said and done so work it out.I am surprised she wasn't volunteering already if her mom was too. Sorry but David came off like a child in this one as well with how he was acting. They both need to get a damn clue. 

Ben and Vicki both have spending issues. Sorry dude but you can't tell her crap on her spending but not suck it up and let her tell you the same. Doesn't work that way. I didn't get the feeling that she spends that much on a candle most the time but I do get the feeling that neither like cheap places or used. Yet at this point in time they should be doing such. Heck girl, go to Bath and Body Works when the candles are on sale and you can get some nice ones if you want candles and many of them for the price of that one. Lattes, go small if its an option or cut back to a few a week. Make it a treat instead of a need all the time. I love my Starbucks fraps but could never do those daily. I get one a week if that when I take my daughter to ballet since its right by there. Its my treat for the week and I only get a small. I do agree that the car needs to go though. That thing is a money pit if its constantly got something wrong or breaking down. I'd say get something cheap and used but I just can't see him doing that. With decor, I'd say go to Target, Walmart or something like that but I get the feeling it would be to cheap for them. Meanwhile some of us love those places...as well as seeing what thrift stores or antique stores have. They have be fun to hunt around in since you never know what they have. Obviously these 2 have much to work out though and should have started talking money before getting married too. I have to wonder where the money came from on both sides for them to have such large savings accounts to use in this way. Also it seems like a mistake to use them like this too instead of getting jobs that will work around their school schedules. They will have to at some point because that money will run dry with how they both are. 

I am just done on the other 2 and the fake crud. As I was fast forwarding and saw her doing the laundry it hit me that with all the money these 2 keep claiming to have and where they live, why do they not have a maid? He had talked about money and status before right? So wouldn't they have a maid to do all this stuff to show they have money and whatever status in their community like the rest do? 

[fliptopbox]

I just can't believe that none of these couples discussed this stuff before they were married. Even as "arranged" they all spent time together before the weddiing and should have talked about things like having kids, financial habits, etc. I just want to throw shit at the tv. Hell, my boyfriend and I have talked all about that stuff and we don't even live together yet.

Taylor is an annoying shrew, I think David was being honest when he said he wished he hadn't married her. She;s done nothing but be a bossy bitch and try to control absolutely everything in their relationship. Girl needs to mellow out and take a step back.

I feel like Maneka is putting on a front about being the delicate flower crap.

Vicki is delusional. $62 for a f@#$%#@ candle??? Give me a break. Go to HomeGoods or TJ Maxx. They have tons of candles and home decor that isn't outrageously priced. Their apartment looks so sad and unpersonal. Also, didn't they get wedding gifts, like kitchenware, etc.? Where are those? And I agree that Ben needs to look inward on the spending issue too, because he is just as guilty as Vicki is. How do they even earn money anyway, neither of them have jobs!!!

[Evil Queen]

39 minutes ago, fliptopbox said:

I just can't believe that none of these couples discussed this stuff before they were married. Even as "arranged" they all spent time together before the weddiing and should have talked about things like having kids, financial habits, etc. I just want to throw shit at the tv. Hell, my boyfriend and I have talked all about that stuff and we don't even live together yet.

This is what drives me nuts since they all were really dating beforehand. Its not like it couldn't have been talked about during that time. Especially if they knew they were getting married. As well as with Ben and Vicki's case they had to have known each other's spending issues beforehand as well. They go to school together and spent time outside of it together. It just seems odd that if none of this was discussed before marriage when all those topics are normal discusses you have with your soon to be husband/wife or someone you are seriously dating. 

[Pepper Mostly]

1 hour ago, fliptopbox said:

Vicki is delusional. $62 for a f@#$%#@ candle??? Give me a break. Go to HomeGoods or TJ Maxx. They have tons of candles and home decor that isn't outrageously priced. Their apartment looks so sad and unpersonal. Also, didn't they get wedding gifts, like kitchenware, etc.? Where are those?

Right? That's what I said! When I got married I was well over 30 so we didn't need kitchenware or anything, but when I go to a wedding for a young couple I always go for the practical. A crystal vase might be more wedding-y, but a clutch of kitchen gadgets or a spice rack will be used and appreciated. Why are they eating take out off paper plates? Talk about a waste of money! They had an Orthodox wedding and no one ponied up for any of the items they'd use for religious observance at home as a gift? I don't know why this bugs me so much, but it does. Guess I'll go have a vanilla latte and calm down. :-)

[Magoo]

I fast forward through all of Taylor and David's segments because they make me so uncomfortable and I can't deal with her nastiness.  What's hilariously horrible to me though, while it's FF'ing all I see is a speeded-up Taylor making shitty faces, Taylor scowling, Taylor yelling, Taylor looking ready to explode, and...Taylor lying down on the couch.  Does she ever get off that couch?

Edited June 22, 2016 by Magoo
clarity

[Jusagirlintheworld]

Why didn't Vicki and Ben attend seminars on marital issues, like budgeting,  through their church?

My church offers classes on all sorts of topics.  Like budgeting.  Our church offers classes on finances - how to budget each month (and provides budgeting forms), suggestions on how to reconcile spending differences between a husband and wife, how to bargain hunt, how to negotiate big ticket items, and how to invest (eg,401(k), IRAs, etc).   Many kids take it before heading off to college.  Our pastor definitely recommends it to engaged couples.

Our church offers other classes such as parenting, marital communication, workplace attire and etiquette, etc.

Ben would be much more sensitive if he and Vicki had attended a class on how to bond and relate to each other during niddah.   

Edited June 22, 2016 by Jusagirlintheworld

[Evil Queen]

Jusagirlintheworld, I sadly don't think it would have helped Ben at all. Even after having it pointed out to him by the Rabbi on certain things he still doesn't really change. I can see him running out the door every time she gets her period. Considering they are in college you would think they would know how to budget in some way, shape or form. I have a feeling that even if they were both told to go to shops that are not all high end and expensive but more budget friendly ones that they would both say no. I doubt they have ever really lived in a way that most of us would/do. Most of us would not go in the high end, overly expensive store to look around when shopping for specific things that we know we can't get there on our budget. We would go to the store that worked with what we could afford. So knowing they had a price point why go to these stores? Why not some place else? That was my problem with this as well when watching it. Ben whining about money and acting like he gets excited over saving it was such a damn joke. He has no clue how to save money just like she doesn't. I'm sure if it gets to tough their parents will help bail them out. I think if he doesn't start acting more like an adult in how he handles things and stop putting it all on being her fault for certain things that they are doomed. Just as she will have to learn to cut back the spending. 

[Pepper Mostly]

14 minutes ago, Evil Queen said:

Even after having it pointed out to him by the Rabbi on certain things he still doesn't really change.

I agree. And heavens forbid that he actually sit down and have a real conversation with his wife about her feelings (and his!) about negotiating niddah. He runs to his rabbi mentor, who, for all Ben's gushing about how rich he is in wisdom, doles out some pretty basic Advice to Newlyweds 101. Sheesh. 

Ben wants Vicky to give up her lattes but he likes sushi, so that stays. What a turd. 

[Lightning]

Watched the last 4 episodes.   All three of these couples are trainwrecks, IMHO.   Ben would drive me crazy in two seconds.   No thoughtfulness towards his wife at all.  David looks like a caveman, Taylor is a shrew.   The Indian male is too much -- makes up a checklist for his wife's chores?? Who does that?  Did he just want a maid?  Taylor is going to meet a guy much more to her liking than David being a flight attendant.  He will probably be very glad to be rid of her.

[jacksgirl]

Late to.this show so I missed first episode and will catch up someday. Do Ben and Vicki come from money? Hubby and I married in school and were so frugal, Mac and cheese, Nattie Light beer and second hand clothes stores.  Years later, we finally are comfortable, but have ingrained thrifty in our sons. Two lattes a day? That's crazy. Wonder what Vicki's gym membership is? They are too old to be such money dumbshits.

Edited June 23, 2016 by jacksgirl

[Lived In Inch]

4 hours ago, jacksgirl said:

Late to.this show so I missed first episode and will catch up someday. Do Ben and Vicki come from money? Hubby and I married in school and were so frugal, Mac and cheese, Nattie Light beer and second hand clothes stores.  Years later, we finally are comfortable, but have ingrained thrifty in our sons. Two lattes a day? That's crazy. Wonder what Vicki's gym membership is? They are too old to be such money dumbshits.

Well they rented out a museum for their wedding,  that doesn't cost cheap. Her parents must have some good income and a guilty conscience because they divorced when she was a kid. 

Spending twenty dollars on a candle is still ridiculously expensive, it's Vicki's daily coffee budget. And yes cutting out a few coffees a week does make a difference. She could have bought that crazy expensive candle if she cut off some stuff.  You don't have to buy expensive and brand name all of the time. I save up for quality items so I don't run up my credit card.  And I do have a job which helps. 

And I have to constantly remind myself that this show is scripted.  And all the couples are acting the way they are because cameras are in their faces. 

Edited June 23, 2016 by Lived In Inch

[Evil Queen]

11 hours ago, Lived In Inch said:

Well they rented out a museum for their wedding,  that doesn't cost cheap. Her parents must have some good income and a guilty conscience because they divorced when she was a kid. 

Spending twenty dollars on a candle is still ridiculously expensive, it's Vicki's daily coffee budget. And yes cutting out a few coffees a week does make a difference. She could have bought that crazy expensive candle if she cut off some stuff.  You don't have to buy expensive and brand name all of the time. I save up for quality items so I don't run up my credit card.  And I do have a job which helps. 

And I have to constantly remind myself that this show is scripted.  And all the couples are acting the way they are because cameras are in their faces. 

I am betting his parents have money as well though too. Its not just the coffee...remember she pointed out that he takes his lunch to school that she makes him, only eats so much of it and then gets sushi. That is just what she was able to say and that was edited in. Who knows what other expenses he has going that he won't give up as well...besides the sushi and car. LOL That is what they each need to do...go get jobs!  

[PityFree]

I wonder what it is costing them to park that awful car in NY city?

[becauseIsaidso]

Well, I had been looking forward to this season of Arranged, but all my expectations/hopes have been totally dashed.  Maneedy and Manure are even WORSE fake fakers who fake - easily outdoing the previous season's Vereel and Ragini...I sincerely hope they do NOT procreate...I can not imagine the world with more than one Manure

Taylor is the absolute quintessential caricature of the nagging/fishwife/harpy/shrew...David could do with more than being a lump, but is still the lesser offensive of the two....I can not believe people from two different churches would not have had the 'which church' discussion long, long, ago....especially if Taylor is so totally devoted to her Southern Baptist roots....more fakery..

I REALLY wanted to like Vicki and Ben, but was unfortunately not surprised when he proved to be a rather arrogant, condescending, I'm-right-you're-wrong wet behind the ears buttwad, able to conveniently cite some obscure Torah law to bolster his side. Vicki's level of immaturity and excessive spending was a surprise...I LOVE nice things, I have a lot of them, and I paid for every one of them with money I earned at a real-life job, but not until the household bills and a bit in the savings account had all been taken care of...that's called responsibility... and, as several other posters have stated, I can't imagine why they need a car. I'm not all that familiar with NYC, only visited there a couple of times, but was still quite impressed with the ease of travel throughout the area using a combo of foot/taxi/subway travel...and from the sheer number of people/vehicles (seeming gargantuan to my boondocks oriented frame of reference) it would seem to me that a personal auto would be much more of a hassle than it's worth.

Think I may be writing this one off for the rest of the season....Taylor's constant nasty attitude and screeching are doing unkind things to my blood pressure.

On the other hand, I've seen a few commercials for the next season of Married at First Sight and may give that a look-see....or not....depends on how much of a glutton for punishment I am on the day it airs

[AussieBabe]

They are broke arse uni students. Twice daily lattes and $62 candles with no jobs? The side eyes were real. I splurge on candles because I'm keen on Kelly Hoppen and Jo Malone. I'm also out of university and work. Mummy and daddy or financial aid aren't funding my lifestyle. Ben grates on my nerves. I wish I could say it was a bad script or solely editing. I think that's just him. Word of advice, children. Stop trying to live the Moët life on a Miller Lite budget.

Taylor just doesn't seem like a happy person in general. You can make somebody look bad with editing, but I think that's just her: domineering, loud, and rude. I believe he does regret marrying her. He seems like a genuinely nice guy. They're two months in, and he looks over it. Time apart is probably a blessing in disguise.

Maneka and Mayur..I don't even care.

[Big Mother]

Vicki's friend posted on Facebook that the apartment on the show isnt even the apartment she and Ben are actually living in. They live in Far Rockaway. But they film in that apartment, becajse their landlord doenzs't want production in their apartment. Wow. That makes more sense; Orthodox couples don't rent apartments that don't have room for a second bed. But it makes me skepitcal just how much of this show, and other reality shows, are staged.

[PityFree]

13 minutes ago, Big Mother said:

Vicki's friend posted on Facebook that the apartment on the show isnt even the apartment she and Ben are actually living in. They live in Far Rockaway. But they film in that apartment, becajse their landlord doenzs't want production in their apartment. Wow. That makes more sense; Orthodox couples don't rent apartments that don't have room for a second bed. But it makes me skepitcal just how much of this show, and other reality shows, are staged.

Thanks for that tidbit! Of course that means that Vicky lost the battle to live close to her school and Ben got his way again.

[Lily247]

Thanks for that tidbit as well! So that just makes this show even faker than it already is. It also explains why the apartment seems so empty and barren. To be honest, a truly Orthodox couple would NOT film themselves and private things about themselves on national TV - there is a certain level of modesty and privacy ingrained in them. I dont like Ben because of his pompous nature. I also dont like Vicki because of how eager she seems to be married - she'll do anything for Ben and not in the right way IMO. For example, Ben bragged about all the perks og being married - intimacy, she does everything for him, etc. He doesnt have to work, cook, or clean or basically do anything except learn in the yeshiva I guess, and she seems happy with that. She seems VERY uncomfortable with covering her hair on TV, I see she always has strands of hair framing her face, this is not a good sign. 

I believe unless it is for work reasons, or visiting family, it is unacceptable for a husband to hang out with friends and come back home in the morning, NOT COOL. Obviously Ben wasnt going to the strip club or anything but it doesnt matter, it just displays how immature he is, and I feel like he is almost using Vicki. 

Surprisingly, Taylor and David are the only couple that don't mention their sex life at all, and I appreciate that. 

Maneka and Mayur.... well, the plus side of Mayur is that he seems to be very hard working and wealthy as a result of his hard work. But he does not seem interested in her, I dont know if he is just uncomfortable on camera to display affection or what. Im not sure why Maneka is a real estate agent if she has her own clothing store, but what do I know. 

I may comment on here a lot ... this is my destressing while the baby is napping. LOL. 

[ChlcGirl]

I think Taylor & David don't talk about sex because they aren't having it lol  Can you imagine wanting to be naked and vulnerable with that shrew???  ?

[James79]

ChicGirl,

I have to agree with you on this...they ain't having sex...David needs to step it up in the bedroom and Taylor attitude will surely change...she'll be a lot nicer :)

But anyways...Ben needs to get rid of that VW TDI piece of junk...I use to have a 2001 VW 1.8T Turbocharged and that car gave me nothing but problems...they should get a honda with less maintenance to maintain!

[Buymosaic]

I'm considering not watching anymore.....unless I hear that David is going to dump Taylor.  She needs to find a masochististic weakling who she can pound on....what a dung heap she is!!!!

[Jellybeans]

I can't stand Mayur.  He is more into collecting houses, cars, things...not into his family.  

[becauseIsaidso]

On 6/24/2016 at 9:59 AM, Big Mother said:

Vicki's friend posted on Facebook that the apartment on the show isnt even the apartment she and Ben are actually living in. They live in Far Rockaway. But they film in that apartment, becajse their landlord doenzs't want production in their apartment. Wow. That makes more sense; Orthodox couples don't rent apartments that don't have room for a second bed. But it makes me skepitcal just how much of this show, and other reality shows, are staged.

Wait a minute.....this really pisses me the fuck totally off!  If they did NOT take the Harlem apartment, what the hell was that bit about ben claiming, on camera, to be making the concession to live in Harlem to show that he is taking vicki's needs and wants into consideration.  The ONLY reason for that segment was to show some responsible, mature, considerate thinking/acting on his part in regard to the woman he has been trying to browbeat, lay a guilt trip on, and manipulate for the entire show. AND IT WAS ALL A  BIG FAT LIE!?!?!?!?!?!?

I'm not a Jew, so someone, please tell me, where in Torah does it condone this behavior.

What is the law that says Jewish men (and I use the term VERY loosely in ben's case) are encouraged to manipulate and lie to their wives.

Is this what ben learned in his pre -marital counseling?

No wonder he clings to that crap POS car...

Geez...the one couple I had counted on for some genuine interaction is nothing but a big fat fraud.

At least Manure is quite blatant and above board with his misogynistic arrogance....that Maneedy chose to marry him and stay with him is on her....from what I have seen of her family, they would no doubt understand her 2nd marital mistake and welcome her back, so I can see no pressure on her to stay with this creep, other than her apparent obsession with popping out a kid asap.

I guess, all things considered, Taylor and David are the most honest couple. He probably is the wimp/overly compromising man he appears to be. She, most definitely is the nasty piece of work she is portraying. If I had had any doubt about it, and that was pretty much decided for me long before this episode...this bullshit about which church to attend confirms it. As there was NO mention of David and Taylor attending church together before they got married, she's got no leg to stand on now. She is the epitome of a convenient christian - the kind that clings to whatever works in her favor and discards/refuses to obey those precepts that don't stroke her enormous ego.

Last season I found Christian and Maria (and Nina and Michael) entertaining enough, as well as being consistent in practicing what they preached....this season has so far been a total waste of time.

Now, with this bullshit behavior from a yeshiva boy who is supposedly SO devoted to religious orthodoxy is just too much. How can you be living 'in the moment' and be so willing to engage in media manipulation? Hypocrites, the lot of them.

[Big Mother]

I dont think their attraction is a fraud or that their marriage is a fraud. They *are* living part time in that apartment, on weekdays, to film the show. It just doesnt have their furniture or furnishings, as they probably spend weekends, holidays etc in their *real* apartment in Far Rockaway. So many of these reality shows are half-staged half-acted and barely reflect the "Real" personalities of these people.

[buttersister]

Quote

Why are they eating take out off paper plates? Talk about a waste of money!

Because that's the only way to keep a kosher home in that teeny, tiny kitchen of theirs---two sets of dishes, pots/pans, silverware, two sets of appliances? Nope. The dishes and all their other tons of stuff are up in the Far Rockaway apartment. Far away from the "shooting' apartment. Close to where Ben hangs with his buds a lot more often than any newlywed man I saw. I agree with an earlier poster---all this seems unseemly for Modern Orthodox (or most normal people, for that matter).

David wanting Taylor to get a 3-week job was hilariously passive-aggressive. Not unearned, mind you.

[Evil Queen]

Well if its true that they are living in Far Rockaway it means Ben got his way on all counts. Plus the show comes off in bad light if its true as well for them not living in their true place. As for if its  because of the landlord in their real place not wanting filming or something else who knows as well. If that is the case then its another thing that should have been thought of before filming this and getting mixed up in it. No matter what my opinion of Ben is he is controlling and always will be. Vicki should have ran from that relationship. She has had to do all the giving up of things and he has had to give up what? 

becauseIsaidso, I agree with the hypocrite comment. 

[becauseIsaidso]

Well said, Evil Queen,

I would have been much less inclined to put ben/vicki in the faking column IF they had been honest about where they actually 'live'. I can completely understand a landlord not wanting the filming done on his property, that's not my issue...it is the lie about which location is their actual/true/real home that pisses me off, particularly because it/the lie was both totally unnecessary and clearly contrived to make it (falsely) seem that ben has any regard/consideration at all for his wife.

I also don't recall ben apologizing for wasting both food money and vicki's time in preparing his lunches when he, according to what she said and he did not contradict, only eats part of the homemade lunch, then trashes the rest in favor of purchasing sushi.  Clearly, she needs to curtail her spending - but at least she acknowledges that she does have a tendency to overspend.  ben seems to think that everything he says/does/wants is blessed from on high - his arrogance and controlling attitude may not be as loudly and stridently voiced as taylor's, but it is very much the same. Too bad David isn't an observant Jew - I wonder how his mildness would match up with vicki's need to be handled with kid gloves.

[Evil Queen]

becauseIsaidso, that is so right! It bugs me because of the lies. I think just the fact that he spends as he does (who knows what else besides sushi) and wastes food as he does is horrible. I have a feeling there is so much more to what he spends than she was able to get out or they let us hear with the edit. I agree he is coming off very much like Taylor but without the loud mouth. He is coming off more underhanded in a way about it while she is one that puts it all out there. 

[moonbunnychan]

On 6/23/2016 at 6:35 PM, becauseIsaidso said:

 I'm not all that familiar with NYC, only visited there a couple of times, but was still quite impressed with the ease of travel throughout the area using a combo of foot/taxi/subway travel...and from the sheer number of people/vehicles (seeming gargantuan to my boondocks oriented frame of reference) it would seem to me that a personal auto would be much more of a hassle than it's worth.

It depends on where you are, really.  When people think of NYC they mostly think of Manhattan, but places like Far Rockaway (and truthfully like half of Queens and a decent chunk of Brooklyn) are much more suburban.  You can get to Far Rockaway by train but it's harder to get around there and most people depend on cars.  In Manhattan, yes absolutely a car is more trouble then it's worth.

[becauseIsaidso]

10 hours ago, moonbunnychan said:

It depends on where you are, really.  When people think of NYC they mostly think of Manhattan, but places like Far Rockaway (and truthfully like half of Queens and a decent chunk of Brooklyn) are much more suburban.  You can get to Far Rockaway by train but it's harder to get around there and most people depend on cars.  In Manhattan, yes absolutely a car is more trouble then it's worth.

Yes, well certainly with this information, it does make the car seem a lot more logical...

However....I am still mightily pissed off that manchild ben didn't hesitate for even a nanosecond to lie about where they really live. I also noticed - and I'm not sure whether it was this episode or another, so this could be a tad OT - in which case apologies for doing so - ben was talking in a very mealy mouthed, hesitant way about how he and Vicki had 'agreed' that he/ben/bigshot would control their finances...I got the distinct impression that he was fully expecting vicki to jump in with a massive contradiction...from that second on I have been certain that this was the result of yet another one of ben's trips to his buddy the rabbi who would find some Torah convenience to once again  pronounce ben correct and vicki shit out of luck for having any voice whatever in how HER household, HER life was to be run.

I am finding vicki's predicament the saddest...she wants the orthodox life, but is being blindsided on every turn with how her opinions/wants/desires don't count for shit...surely someone could have laid it all out for her before the engagement/wedding took place? Did her previous experience in Israel/was it in a kibbutz? N

[becauseIsaidso]

10 hours ago, moonbunnychan said:

It depends on where you are, really.  When people think of NYC they mostly think of Manhattan, but places like Far Rockaway (and truthfully like half of Queens and a decent chunk of Brooklyn) are much more suburban.  You can get to Far Rockaway by train but it's harder to get around there and most people depend on cars.  In Manhattan, yes absolutely a car is more trouble then it's worth.

Yes, well certainly with this information, it does make the car seem a lot more logical...

However....I am still mightily pissed off that manchild ben didn't hesitate for even a nanosecond to lie about where they really live. I also noticed - and I'm not sure whether it was this episode or another, so this could be a tad OT - in which case apologies for doing so - ben was talking in a very mealy mouthed, hesitant way about how he and Vicki had 'agreed' that he/ben/bigshot would control their finances...I got the distinct impression that he was fully expecting vicki to jump in with a massive contradiction...from that second on I have been certain that this was the result of yet another one of ben's trips to his buddy the rabbi who would find some Torah convenience to once again  pronounce ben correct and vicki shit out of luck for having any voice whatever in how HER household, HER life was to be run.

I am finding vicki's predicament the saddest...she wants the orthodox life, but is being blindsided on every turn with how her opinions/wants/desires don't count for shit...surely someone could have laid it all out for her before the engagement/wedding took place? Did her previous experience in Israel/was it in a kibbutz? NOT give her any idea of what was to come? Or did she just not pay attention? Did she make the massive mistake of trusting ben to actually have some respect for her?

Edited June 30, 2016 by becauseIsaidso
posted before I was finished