All Episodes Talk: Celebrating Diversity

[SnarkyMcSnarkerson]

2 hours ago, camom said:

Actually, the majority of Down syndrome children are born to younger moms, simply because they are the ones having the most babies.  True, your chances of having a child with DS increase as you get older, but it's a myth that most of these children are born to aging moms.  (I was 21 when I had my child with Down syndrome.)

The 50% chance of Megan having a child with Down syndrome is also not completely accurate.  According to the National Down Syndrome Society, a woman with Down syndrome has a 35%-50% of having a child with DS or other developmental disabilities.  Of course, that doesn't change the fact that Megan herself would be incapable of caring for a child on her own.

Camom, if you're comfortable sharing, have you had the baby conversation with your child yet? I'm curious how parents of DS kids handle this, and I don't know that I trust Kris to ever get real enough with Megan to really tell her why she doesn't want her to have a baby. This is such a difficult subject, I can't even imagine where I'd start.

[camom]

SnarkyMcSnarkerson, yes, we've had that discussion.  She loves babies, but understands that she would not be able to care for one on her own.  There are only two things I've ever told her she can't do because she has Down syndrome.  One is having babies, the other is driving. (While she could learn the rules of the road, her reflexes aren't nearly quick enough to handle it.)  I am noticing that a lot of families that have teens and young adults with DS are under the belief that their kids can do anything and everything they want, which simply isn't true.  All of us have natural limitations.  When I was young I wanted to be a ballerina.  I loved to dance (still do in my living room), but my body type (short and stout) was going to prevent me from being a professional dancer.  My mom encouraged me to love dance, but also threw in the reality that joining a professional ballet company just wasn't likely.  I feel sorry for some of these kids when reality strikes.  Let's face it, John isn't likely to become a famous rapper.  Megan isn't prepared to live independently.  One of these days Sean is going to hit on the wrong woman and get in big trouble.  I want my daughter to do everything her heart desires, but I'm realistic enough to know that she is not capable of some of it.  So my job includes encouraging her and helping her set realistic goals.

[SnarkyMcSnarkerson]

45 minutes ago, camom said:

SnarkyMcSnarkerson, yes, we've had that discussion.  She loves babies, but understands that she would not be able to care for one on her own.  There are only two things I've ever told her she can't do because she has Down syndrome.  One is having babies, the other is driving. (While she could learn the rules of the road, her reflexes aren't nearly quick enough to handle it.)  I am noticing that a lot of families that have teens and young adults with DS are under the belief that their kids can do anything and everything they want, which simply isn't true.  All of us have natural limitations.  When I was young I wanted to be a ballerina.  I loved to dance (still do in my living room), but my body type (short and stout) was going to prevent me from being a professional dancer.  My mom encouraged me to love dance, but also threw in the reality that joining a professional ballet company just wasn't likely.  I feel sorry for some of these kids when reality strikes.  Let's face it, John isn't likely to become a famous rapper.  Megan isn't prepared to live independently.  One of these days Sean is going to hit on the wrong woman and get in big trouble.  I want my daughter to do everything her heart desires, but I'm realistic enough to know that she is not capable of some of it.  So my job includes encouraging her and helping her set realistic goals.

You're an awesome mom :)

[Bastet]

That's why the "Don't limit me" slogan doesn't strike me as the best, although I certainly understand the impetus behind it.  There are limits on what these people can do.  There are limits on what all of us can do.  We have physical, intellectual, emotional, financial, etc. circumstances that we can overcome, and we have those we can't change.  The latter limit us. 

So, as I said, I understand the push-back against the ignorance and bias that lead so many to treat those with DS as if they're all the same, and incapable of doing just about anything.  But we can also see from the families profiled on this show that some of them have gone too far, and not been realistic with their kids about what that individual person can and cannot do.

[camom]

Aw shucks, Snarky, thanks.

[Nowhere]

I don't see the parents giving the children any false hopes. A rap cd is something I can go do tomorrow if I had the money to get it recorded and I could put it on iTunes no matter how bad it sucked. Trust me. There are a couple of kids who go to school with mine that have entire albums on iTunes. Let's just say I don't see them making any money outside of grandma buying the album.

Meghan has Megology but I don't think her mom is giving her the impression that she can do it all by herself. 

The only real issue I see is the baby thing. They are not being real with the kids about this. I don't think I would wait until my daughter was sexually mature to tell her she can't have a child. That would be something I would have been telling her since childhood (when appropriate and if the subject came up). I don't understand why this is a new topic of conversation. 

The other problem I see is Sean. The parents aren't teaching him how to treat a lady. It doesn't seem like it at least.

I don't see an issue with the careers.

Edited August 2, 2016 by Nowhere

[camom]

Just like with anyone, the parents' financial input plays a big part.  Anyone can make a CD if they have the money.  Christina can tie-dye to her heart's content, but that doesn't mean it's financially profitable.  I want them all to do what they love, but I think the reality is that they are not going to earn a living doing so.  I am more concerned about basic independent living skills -- some of these people have them but some could do more and don't.

[auntjess]

30 minutes ago, camom said:

Christina can tie-dye to her heart's content, but that doesn't mean it's financially profitable.

Yes, I think the back orders were because of the show, and orders came to show support for her efforts. and then like other people who get sudden exposure, whether on I Want That or Oprah, they suddenly have more orders than they can fulfill, and create ill will.
I think Sean could well get in trouble by coming on to the wrong woman, and I see his folks sometimes try to rein him in, but other times seem to find his behavior cute.
I feel guilty, because I'm so turned off by Megan's smugness, and grandiose plans sometimes, that I find myself rooting against her.

 

[cooksdelight]

I've watched the first two episodes and I can already see this show suffering from sudden-success-on-reality-tv syndrome. It's not coming across as natural as the first season.

And....Las Vegas? Hooker talk? WTF? 

Elena still bugs me. She whines all the time, and has a sense of entitlement. Not sure where that comes from, but I wish she'd tone it down a little with all of the crying and stomping her feet when she doesn't get her way.

I have a sincere question - why do none of these young people drink alcohol? Not that they should, but I have noticed they all abstain, even the ones who are almost 30.

Somebody needs to make it happen for Sean to meet Justin Bieber.

[Cherrio]

32 minutes ago, cooksdelight said:

why do none of these young people drink alcohol?

I am pretty sure they showed Sean and Steven drinking beer last season.   It could of been non-alcoholic though.

        I missed Elena this episode.  I am not going to say I like or dislike any of these people, they have a disability that makes their personalities, like being extremely annoying, very sweet, frustrating....you get my drift. :)    I give props to Elena though for showing imo a whole lot more than the others.   We see the good, the bad and the ugly.    It breaks my heart when I see her upset.    She seems to have a lot of insight, more than some of the others and is honest and very open with her feelings.  Sure, she over reacts, but she appropriately feels bad and usually apologizes.

      For instance I think Meghan's mom stops the filming or coddles her so she wont have a meltdown.    Heck, these parents are all so calm, happy and zen. I don't buy it.  They have to get angry and frustrated sometimes, right?     I think we are seeing maybe 20% of the real Sean. I get it, no parent wants their children to have a tantrum on national tv.      I am getting the feeling that the cast members are very fragile emotionally, from how the parents are tip toeing around etc.    Another example. Sean comes with a very lengthy instruction manual for the Vegas trip.   He clearly only does what he wants to do and say. 

                     The parents imo are fair game.    I REALLY dislike Sean's mom.  Most of us have already said Sean's talk and behavior needs a lot of work. Another poster said recently, he is going to get in real trouble if it doesn't stop. I agree.

         So what the F is the hooker talk?   I get the part about warning him, but it really made me angry calling them hookers.  They should of said prostitutes.Then the whole spiel about the "hookers" watching the show, trying to get with their celebrity son? Oh, so hookers don't watch a semi educational show? Hmmmm I bet she screams bloody murder when someone makes a stupid generalization about her son or calls him a name.  Wipe the grin off your face lady.     I can't imagine how hard all the parents lives are, but it doesn't give you a pass to act like an asshole.

[Nowhere]

I thought that John's parents were looking at his rap and hip hop as more of a hobby. If she's saying she's giving him another year to make it take off, then she is giving him false hopes. I love that they are giving John these opportunities but I don't think he will see an income. 

We have a friend who is a hip hop artist, has 4 albums, writes and composes his own lyrics and music, actually has his own local concerts that sell pretty well, even opened for tech-9 a couple times on tour. He's GOOD and he still isn't to the point that he's making money. They still have a very modest starter home. The music business is soooo competitive. John's mom really needs to tell him that it's a hobby that he loves and he's good at it but it's not going to make money. Maybe she just doesn't understand the way it works but I was disappointed.

Meg's boyfriend's mom is no nonsense and Kris should hang out with her more. I have to say that I'm sick of Meg thinking she can leave her mother and being so adamant about it. I'm glad Kris told her no. But I noticed that they were talking about taking care of "Meg's" business when she's back in California. Sure I'd love to up and move to my dream state but it's not realistic. Where do they draw the line? 

Also I hated that they advertised whatever that health bar was at the beginning of the show. I could just see the producers telling her to go ask if they were hungry so they could zoom in on the label. I can't stand it when reality shows do this. 

[ClareWalks]

Granted I have only been to Vegas 5 times, but I have never seen "hookers" (BARF at that outdated misogynistic term) prowling the streets. There are escort services that are advertised (handouts/fliers from men) but it's not like the movie Pretty Woman or something. Prostitution is not legal in the city of Las Vegas. Sean's parents really kind of suck. Yeah yeah, I know they have a hard job, but it's not hard to respect women and model that respect for your child.

[Brooklynista]

I'm surprised John's mom lets him get away with having such a potty mouth.  I'm no prude but he really lets the F bombs fly.

[configdotsys]

The vibe this season is just the opposite of last year. Nothing seems authentic. They are not showing us how people with DS manage their daily lives but instead are showing pipe dreams, trips (which to me usually means the show has jumped the shark) and scripted conversations about nonsense a la “Which celebrity would you like to meet?”

First thing we got was product placement for Kind bars.

It is not realistic for John to think he can be a rapper. It has nothing to do with him having DS. The entertainment business is a tough one to break into and a reality television program might get you some publicity but once the cameras stop he has nothing to fall back on at 30-something. It’s like vanity publishing: anyone can put their stuff online and while it may sound awesome to them, “My book is on Amazon!” or “My song is on iTunes!” the reality is that those outlets are flooded with stuff. There are no gatekeepers choosing quality materials to put in these outlets. The door is open to anyone to put their stuff online without it being vetted for quality.

Megan’s mom has not prepared Megan for real life and now that Megan has a business and a serious boyfriend, Mom is trying to catch up while Megan wants to fly away. That is rough to do. Mom’s Brady Bunch way of talking to Megan— I think— is not helpful, i.e., “Okay. I understand. I’m fine. Sometime we have different opinions…” She needed to be telling her daughter that she is not ready to live alone and may never be able to do so because that is the truth. If she married and lived in a two family house with Mom upstairs or something, that could be a workable solution but for her to live independently in another state doesn’t seem realistic.

When Sean’s mother was talking to him about the ATM card and said “You have been responsible. You haven’t gotten haircuts for no reason” made me think he just spends and spends because he is reckless. It’s hard for me to believe that anyone would be on board with friends— inexperienced in dealing with people with DS in any real way— taking him to Vegas and putting him in a hotel room alone. You can see how pissed he gets when people try to explain rules to him. He did it to his parents and to his friend Sean. This trip was strictly for the show. 

I totally agree with the poster who mentioned the Don’t Limit Me line. It’s a great sentiment but saying it over and over is what makes Megan believe she can just pack up and move to LA and do just fine without her mother. It's as if Megan (and the others) think that it is other people that are limiting them when the truth is it's their disability that limits them in some way. Everyone has limitations of some kind (health wise, financial, etc.) and has to live within those limitations. That is not a bad thing, that is just how life works. That should be the message. 

Edited August 3, 2016 by configdotsys

[auntjess]

I agree that Kris needs to listen to Brendan's mom.  Too, Megan should have to work on "her business."  At the moment it may seem to be making money, but Kris and the cousin should draw salaries from that.
Kris should ask her what she thinks she'd need to do to move to LA, and how she'd get the money.

I think John's mom at least has given him a deadline to earn money, but I wonder about his driving.
I don't think Sean should have been sent off to Vegas without his parents, and in truth, I think the producers seem to be cast in the role of sitters.
 

[Christi]

So we need to be politically correct about Hookers now?? Alrightly then ...omg lololol

[Christi]

It bothers me that people are saying these people cant live independent  lives...that they cant leave their parents.   That is an unrealistic view...these kids will long outlive their parents.

This show is based on The Specials, a UK reality show.

www.the-specials.com

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Specials_(internet_TV_series)&ved=0ahUKEwiy-auZ5KbOAhXIxYMKHR_SC2cQFggnMAQ&usg=AFQjCNGpFSFD92k3Ry7awZzPdyw2w_PdxQ

None of them live with their parents, they life an a wonderfully supportive group home.  They are learning life skills, responsibilities with respect, giving them self esteem and a sense of independence, without being hovered over and coddled.

Yeah, Im sure there are crappy homes, but Im also sure there are really good ones.

Meg's mom saying it would take her 4 hours to teach her something, so its just easier for her to do it, was insulting to me.

These kids need a chance to blossom rather than be babied.

Edited August 4, 2016 by Christi

[ClareWalks]

8 hours ago, Christi said:

So we need to be politically correct about Hookers now?? Alrightly then ...omg lololol

Not necessarily, but the parents laughing about hookers explains a LOT about how Sean acts around women.

[configdotsys]

10 hours ago, Christi said:

It bothers me that people are saying these people cant live independent  lives...that they cant leave their parents.   That is an unrealistic view...these kids will long outlive their parents.

 

I definitely did not mean that none of these people could or should not leave their parents. I think group homes and roommate arrangements are wonderful. But people with limitations need some level of help getting along and that should be local and available. I think group homes have live-in non-DS people living there too, don't they?

The issue I have is Megan telling her mother that she wants to go to LA "alone" and live "alone" with her mother staying in Colorado. I don't see that working at all and if it happened, I don't think Megan's mom would ever have a decent night sleep again. 

[Hey2all]

John Tucker needs to lose the rap persona. He comes off as rude and arrogant. He seemed to have had a great time with volunteering at the animal store, why doesn't he persue that?

Yeah, the kind bar advertising was cheesy. I think the producers are trying it out...next, it will be promoting places and people for money-oh wait, that's happening already.

I do think we need to see some "real" events and less staged outings.The  Down syndrome community does have a lot of dances, so that was real. I don't think the Vegas trip was real.

I almost wish they would involve other agencies outside of leaps n bounds because there are so many other ways these people spend their lives. When my mom worked with them, some only went to classes, and some when to college, and some were working and going to school. I love the idea of leaps and bounds, but it only shows the one community center way. There are also programs that have a "daycare" format to them.

Just more "reality" and less drama would be nice.

[gunderda]

Elena lives in a group home - they talked about it last season.

I'm sure most of the parents would love for their kids to be able to move into a group home and live 'alone' - however I'm sure it's not cheap AT ALL.  Which is maybe why there's a lot of hesitation from most of the parents. None of these adult "children" have jobs that will help assist them financially.  

[auntjess]

Quote

It bothers me that people are saying these people cant live independent  lives...that they cant leave their parents.   That is an unrealistic view...these kids will long outlive their parents.

Living independent of their parents doesn't mean they can live indepently.
The older people I knew at church, did move their son into a group home, but it was in loco parentis, so that he'd be cared for when they died, not really independent living.
Another friend segued into caring for her brother, as her parents grew too frail to do it, as John's folks have planned.
Neither of these means that someone is able to be truly independent.
 

Edited August 4, 2016 by auntjess

[HelloOutThere]

On 8/3/2016 at 7:11 AM, ClareWalks said:

Granted I have only been to Vegas 5 times, but I have never seen "hookers" (BARF at that outdated misogynistic term) prowling the streets. There are escort services that are advertised (handouts/fliers from men) but it's not like the movie Pretty Woman or something. Prostitution is not legal in the city of Las Vegas. Sean's parents really kind of suck. Yeah yeah, I know they have a hard job, but it's not hard to respect women and model that respect for your child.

In my experience after many trips to Vegas, the majority of prostitutes aren't walking the streets but found in the casinos, dressed to the nines and hardly looking like "cheap hookers." They cozy up to men at the gambling tables or in the bars - usually late at night when the inebriation level is high - and sweet talk men into taking them up to their rooms. Next thing you know they're asking for money, or they're out. Many men end up paying, either out of intoxication, fear, or (usually) bruised ego. ("I though that hot girl from the bar was really into me!") It can be difficult to tell if a girl is simply attractive and single or a prostitute, especially in hotels that cater to the "hot, young" demographic like the Cosmopolitan, for example. As a gay man who has done many Vegas trips with straight male friends, I have saved several from this fate.

I could totally see Sean lured into such a situation. I think his parents' message was good about keeping his wits about him when interacting with strange women in Vegas -- their execution was just very rough. (But I do appreciate that his parents put no on no airs for the camera -- the scene when they were discussing what they wanted to do on their free weekend was very real. So was their interview about having Sean gone and how it's a nice break for them.)

Also, while Kind bar may have paid for some air time, apparently no Vegas hotel was willing to. The place they checked into looked like the Bates Motel! There are many "big" hotel / casinos in Vegas that are very inexpensive. I wonder why the reason for the motor inn -- maybe to make filming easier, or to avoid the chances of Sean getting sensory overload and / or wandering off in the night.

Also, I think "other Sean" and his girlfriend are great people for taking Sean on such a trip. I don't think they had any idea what they signed up for until Mom's list of instructions came out. They seem like a very nice couple, but both seem somewhat uneasy. Maybe it's the cameras.

[camom]

Quote

It bothers me that people are saying these people cant live independent  lives...that they cant leave their parents.   That is an unrealistic view...these kids will long outlive their parents.

As others have said, of course they can live independent of their parents, but that doesn't mean they can live independently.  They will need help with daily activities that are beyond their abilities (money management, for example).  Also, it's a generalization, but many people with developmental disabilities are extremely vulnerable.  A friendly neighbor might be able to talk them into just about anything.  

 

And yes, the dance was a regular annual event in the Down syndrome community and the filming was amazingly non-disruptive.  The trips, etc. are obviously manufactured for the show.

[Zanne]

1 hour ago, HelloOutThere said:

Also, I think "other Sean" and his girlfriend are great people for taking Sean on such a trip. I don't think they had any idea what they signed up for until Mom's list of instructions came out. They seem like a very nice couple, but both seem somewhat uneasy. Maybe it's the cameras.

With an instruction list that long, Mom had to have talked to them days before to make sure they understood what was required for the trip. It would have been rude to throw that on them the last minute. I was diagnosed with Type I Diabetes when I was very young. You can bet my mother had conversations with every parent when I stayed over at someone's house for a slumber party, and it did not happen last minute. There was a lot of prep involved. Admittedly, as I got a little older, I was just as embarrassed by it as Sean appeared, but it made my mother feel better, even if I was more capable of taking care of my own needs, at that point.

I was also surprised that John doesn't appear to have a part-time job to help pay for his rap dreams. He is 30, and there are programs that would help prepare him for a job and help him to find one. Most high schools and community colleges have transition program to help young people with special needs that are moving into adulthood to do the same. We even saw a job counselor helping Sean find a job last season. I am glad Mom has put a time limit on rapping because John needs to find something that will help pay the bills. Just like any other artist, you can do what you love, but you also have to do what you need in order to survive. That's why so many wanna-be actors are waiting tables!

I liked Megan's boyfriend's mother more no nonsense approach. It may have appeared "mean", but that's probably in relation to Kris' soft-peddling of Megan's limitations when she's talking to Megan. I have to give both sets of parents props for all of their time and effort that go into Megan and Brendan's(?) relationship. Hearing that they had to initiate phone calls and guide them through conversations, set up dates, and drive them there really shows how much they are willing to invest in keeping their children happy - and for seven years! Though, weird observation, it looked like her boyfriend was less into the kissing than Megan was, but that might have been the cameras. 

[Trampolina]

On ‎8‎/‎2‎/‎2016 at 9:09 PM, Cherrio said:

''I am pretty sure they showed Sean and Steven drinking beer last season.   It could of been non-alcoholic though.

        I missed Elena this episode.  I am not going to say I like or dislike any of these people, they have a disability that makes their personalities, like being extremely annoying, very sweet, frustrating....you get my drift. :)    I give props to Elena though for showing imo a whole lot more than the others.   We see the good, the bad and the ugly.    It breaks my heart when I see her upset.    She seems to have a lot of insight, more than some of the others and is honest and very open with her feelings.  Sure, she over reacts, but she appropriately feels bad and usually apologizes.

      For instance I think Meghan's mom stops the filming or coddles her so she wont have a meltdown.    Heck, these parents are all so calm, happy and zen. I don't buy it.  They have to get angry and frustrated sometimes, right?     I think we are seeing maybe 20% of the real Sean. I get it, no parent wants their children to have a tantrum on national tv.      I am getting the feeling that the cast members are very fragile emotionally, from how the parents are tip toeing around etc.    Another example. Sean comes with a very lengthy instruction manual for the Vegas trip.   He clearly only does what he wants to do and say. 

                     The parents imo are fair game.    I REALLY dislike Sean's mom.  Most of us have already said Sean's talk and behavior needs a lot of work. Another poster said recently, he is going to get in real trouble if it doesn't stop. I agree.

         So what the F is the hooker talk?   I get the part about warning him, but it really made me angry calling them hookers.  They should of said prostitutes.Then the whole spiel about the "hookers" watching the show, trying to get with their celebrity son? Oh, so hookers don't watch a semi educational show? Hmmmm I bet she screams bloody murder when someone makes a stupid generalization about her son or calls him a name.  Wipe the grin off your face lady.     I can't imagine how hard all the parents lives are, but it doesn't give you a pass to act like an asshole.

I'm glad you brought up the 'hooker talk'.  I know I'm sensitive to this issues because I work with young women living that lifestyle (some since the age of 10) but it was upsetting watching that couple make a joke out of these women like they're just straight up trash.  Most have lived a pretty terrible life to get to the place they're in and all of them are someone's daughter.  I'm sure they wouldn't appreciate people making fun of their son for the issues he has.  Also, I don't think any of the girls I've worked with would attempt to take advantage of a person with Down Syndrome.  There are plenty of willing Johns that are looking for that action.

[Cherrio]

48 minutes ago, Trampolina said:

I'm glad you brought up the 'hooker talk'.  I know I'm sensitive to this issues because I work with young women living that lifestyle (some since the age of 10) but it was upsetting watching that couple make a joke out of these women like they're just straight up trash.  Most have lived a pretty terrible life to get to the place they're in and all of them are someone's daughter.  I'm sure they wouldn't appreciate people making fun of their son for the issues he has.  Also, I don't think any of the girls I've worked with would attempt to take advantage of a person with Down Syndrome.  There are plenty of willing Johns that are looking for that action.

Your welcome and I loved your post.   You said what I was originally trying to say much better than I did.

[Nowhere]

Can somebody answer for me how these kids can go to college? Do they actually try to graduate on a college level or is there a special program at some schools or what? 

[crazycatlady58]

3 hours ago, Nowhere said:

Can somebody answer for me how these kids can go to college? Do they actually try to graduate on a college level or is there a special program at some schools or what? 

Nowhere, for most I think it is a special  program  that teaches  life skills . That does not mean someone  who is very high functioning could not graduate  regular  college  classes.

[woodscommaelle]

Rachel could not be cuter.

[camom]

crazycatlady, for the most part they go to programs like this one at UCLA  -  https://www.semel.ucla.edu/opendoors/program/pathway.  They are designed to prepare the students for adulthood and work on independent living skills.  They may take regular college classes, but don't receive a bachelor's degree from the university.  It can be a great transition for them, but they are expensive.

[Hey2all]

Actually, the majority  (at least here in southern California ) of intellectually disabled folks go to community colleges. I've known a few that had to take a class 3-4 times, have tutoring and prompting by helpers...but, they do pass their classes. 

Like any disability, what the individual can do, depends on what they need. 

I know there are programs where people can have "regular" roomates in individual apartments. I'm sure Megan could apply for something like that.

[Christi]

Yes, there ARE hookers in Vegas. Lots...

None of the parents even talk about the posibility of a group home.  I think Megan's mom has her own issues..perhaps an eating disorder, anxiety issues, living through Megan and talking to her like she is 5.  Megan's mom needs to deal with her own issues and start living her own life.  Of COURSE Megan cant live on her own in LA...there is something called compromise. ..try out the group home that the other girl is in.  None of the other kids seem as desperate to get away from their parents...Megan is being smothered.

Sure, group homes arent free, but these people get disability, I know its not much, but Im sure a functional group home is cheaper than sending them to college.  Megan probably brings in a tiny bit of $$ with her business.

These kids need to be in an environment where they are not treated as 10 year olds and being coddled by their loving parents.  I know its hard, but its what is best for them.

Edited August 9, 2016 by Christi

[camom]

In most cases, group homes are paid for through the federal (SSI) and state governments.  However, these people likely aren't getting SSI because they are earning money from the show.  

[Brooklynista]

Rumen...come see me love. Wear that shirt and those pants. 

[Eater of Worlds]

Sean is really like his father, who is kind of a jerk.  However, Sean's father recognizes boundaries and Sean obviously struggles with it.  I would be worried for anyone who dates him without first getting to really know him and learning how to rein him in.  His friends can do it, they have told him when he's getting over the top or what he says isn't the right way to behave.  I'd worry that someone who doesn't have that experience would be bowled over by him.  I used to have a friend who married someone like Sean and the relationship was becoming very bad, primarily because there wasn't anyone who could enforce consequences on his behavior since he hadn't learned boundaries prior to marriage.   We all were trying to get her out of the marriage but she was afraid to leave.  

[SleepyAndClumsy]

This episode was surprisingly touching, especially with Christina's dancing dreams and then Megan's seizure scare. 

But ugh ... Elena can be sweet, but her sulking and crying act in order to get attention is sooo predictable! She must be exhausting to be around. I really felt for her mother tonight.

And once again -- not enough Rachel! Although seeing her finally succeed in getting her huge suitcase on the bed was pretty sweet!

[Brooklynista]

and we have more Kind bars.  Really subtle.

I felt for Elena's mom this episode.  It's clear she tries hard to instill in Elena the correct behavior that is expected of her during certain events.  Elena seems to really struggle with what the appropriate response is in situations.  When she didn't join in the group hug at the hotel, it looked like she wasn't sure herself why she stood apart.  I'm sure it's a struggle to determine which of Elena's moods are caused by the DS vs Elena simply wanting the attention back on her.  Be it good or bad attention.

I hope we learn more about her getting physical with her mother.  I don't remember hearing about Elena hurting others before.  Is this something she's done to others in the group home?  I'm curious.

Edited August 10, 2016 by Brooklynista

[ClareWalks]

6 hours ago, SleepyAndClumsy said:

But ugh ... Elena can be sweet, but her sulking and crying act in order to get attention is sooo predictable! She must be exhausting to be around. I really felt for her mother tonight.

Totally agree. Elena is rather insufferable. I liked that her mom expects her to behave more appropriately, though. 

[VioletNevermind]

Cristina's parents consistently win the award for best parents on this show.  There's just no contest.  Both mom and dad (yum) handle every single situation with a calm, measured attitude that doesn't alienate their daughter or diminish her feelings.  They're a joy to watch.  I love that they signed her up for those dance lessons (another hearty 'yum' for the instructor).  I'm certainly no expert on Down Syndrome, but I would think that learning the mechanics and movements of ballroom dancing would be a perfect self-esteem boosting activity for them.

A close second for this show's best parents/family are Rachel's.  They all seem so close and supportive.  I loved Rachel telling her mom that she had "twerked."  Absolutely adorable.

John's rap career . . . no.  It's time for mom to gently (but firmly) lay down the law and help him to formulate a viable plan for his future.  As obnoxious as he can be, I really dislike the way the people around him allow him to become a sideshow or a subject of ridicule with the rapping.

As for Sean, he's going to get himself into some serious trouble if the people around him don't keep an eye on him.  I understand that he feels enthusiastic about the opposite sex, but I don't think the way his parents laugh at the overly enthusiastic things he says does him any favors.  They've encouraged him to act that way because they get a kick out of it.  I think that's pretty damn selfish.  I hope to God they don't allow him out by himself.  I fear that one of the incredibly shitty people with whom we share our planet will almost certainly take advantage of him (or worse, hurt him), especially in a place like Vegas.  If the editing is to be believed, he was moments from getting that dumbass tattoo if his credit card hadn't been denied.  Who knows; it's hard to tell what is actually genuine on these shows.

I tried very hard last season not to judge Elena's mom.  The regret at having a daughter with Down Syndrome fairly drips from her.  I think my perspective changed last night, seeing her break down in tears with the other mom in the previews for next week.  I reminded myself of how helpless I often feel as the single mom of a rambunctious, mouthy, normally-functioning teenage girl.  It has to be 10 times harder for Elena's mom.  Same deal with Megan's mom.  I know she's taken some (often well-deserved) heat here for the way she's dealt with Megan, but at the end of the day, she's doing the best she can by herself.  Hell, I'm in a constant state of low-grade panic about my own daughter leaving the nest and navigating the world (and all of its duplicitous assholes).  If there's one thing this show has done for me, it's allowed me to look at others' situations with a bit more empathy.  That being said, Megan's mom needs to present her with the facts and work with her to develop a plan.  There are ways to allow Megan to embark on a more independent life, but they have to be explored honestly and openly.  Keeping her locked in a little tie-dyed cage of safety will only make her resent her mother in the long-run.

(I'm glad I wasn't the only one who noticed the super-subtle Kind bar advertisement at the beginning.  The guy slowly unwrapped it and actually said, "Mmm!" when he took a bite.  I mean, come on.)

Edited August 10, 2016 by SuzyLee

[ThinkerBell]

15 hours ago, SleepyAndClumsy said:

This episode was surprisingly touching, especially with Christina's dancing dreams and then Megan's seizure scare. 

But ugh ... Elena can be sweet, but her sulking and crying act in order to get attention is sooo predictable! She must be exhausting to be around. I really felt for her mother tonight.

And once again -- not enough Rachel! Although seeing her finally succeed in getting her huge suitcase on the bed was pretty sweet!

Yay, Team Rachel! Seeing her wrestling with that suitcase melted my heart. Such a sweet young lady.

[woodscommaelle]

21 hours ago, SuzyLee said:

little tie-dyed cage of safety 

Lol! Is it wrong that I want to create my own of one of these?

Do people with Down syndrome tend to have more seizures than someone without it?  And poor Megan.  Even though I'm not her biggest fan that scene just broke my heart.

Is the speech she gave the same she always gives? 

I heart Sean's friend. He's like the older brother. Cute relationship they have.

Rachel decided so quickly that she was getting the bed by the window. Love it.

And Rachel commenting on Kris 'maybe having sex'...bc she knows her.  I bet there's some truth in that statement.  Made me lol!  Give this girl her own show.

Edited August 11, 2016 by woodscommaelle

[Bajovane]

I felt horrible for Elena's mother - I'm glad they weren't filming when Elena pushed her and it does seem that this has been an ongoing problem.  So Elena's being in a group home may not be just because she wants her Independence.

As for Megan - she should be encouraged to think about a group home situation because for her to live completely independently is just not possible.  She will always need some supervision.  Her mom handled her seizure well - I do like Kris even though I do think she may have coddled Megan a bit too much for her sake.

Christina's parents - omg - love them.  It's a fine line they walk - encouraging her dreams yet trying to keep her rooted in reality.  All the parents obviously deal with that fine line.

[Brooklynista]

Not for nothing, I didn't think John's ballet interpretation was that bad.   It was miles better than "professional" dancer Whitney from Big, Fat, Fabulous life.

[Nowhere]

59 minutes ago, Brooklynista said:

Not for nothing, I didn't think John's ballet interpretation was that bad.   It was miles better than "professional" dancer Whitney from Big, Fat, Fabulous life.

Burn 

[fuzzylollipop]

Cheers to your comment Brooklynista, so very true. 

[Eater of Worlds]

On 8/10/2016 at 11:18 AM, SuzyLee said:

 

As for Sean, he's going to get himself into some serious trouble if the people around him don't keep an eye on him.  I understand that he feels enthusiastic about the opposite sex, but I don't think the way his parents laugh at the overly enthusiastic things he says does him any favors.  They've encouraged him to act that way because they get a kick out of it.  I think that's pretty damn selfish.  I hope to God they don't allow him out by himself.  I fear that one of the incredibly shitty people with whom we share our planet will almost certainly take advantage of him (or worse, hurt him), especially in a place like Vegas.  If the editing is to be believed, he was moments from getting that dumbass tattoo if his credit card hadn't been denied.  Who knows; it's hard to tell what is actually genuine on these shows.

 

What really bothered me was that Sean really looked like he thought he was going to get a tattoo.  However, neither the people who took him there nor the tattooist seemed concerned in the slightest that he might actually get one.  The tattooist had to know the script before the filming started and he looked like he was unsurprised that the debit card was declined.  For that matter, nor did Sean C and his...wife?  In fact, the only one who looked surprised that the card was declined was Sean.  If they set up that situation just to see how he reacts without telling him his card would be declined, , that's really shameful.

[auntjess]

1 minute ago, Eater of Worlds said:

For that matter, nor did Sean C and his...wife?

She, I think her name is Hillary, is the one that young Sean more or less stalked, and called her his girlfriend, even though she was going with older Sean at the time,  Don't know if they're married.
They do have experience with Sean and his ways.
I guess someone from the crew maybe shared a suite of connecting room with Sean, because I can see him just walking out.

[auntjess]

I see I never commented earlier on this episode.
When the girls met up and greeted each other, I could see Elena was either left, or just lagging behind, but she looked hurt.
I think she is super-sensitive, and Megan did see that, and ran to hug her, but it was too late.
I feel for her because she seems sad so often.

[booboopbedoo]

I think Elena has had problems before and that is why she is in a group home.

We know that having a child with DS in Japan is not acceptable so maybe she has always been in a home or locked away.

She needs consequences for her actions. She acts like a spoiled brat and pouts and sulks when the attention is on someone else. Her behaviour with the boys is not cool.