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Meri Brown and her Wet Bar of Tears


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So almost 4 minutes of drivel about breakfast, 15 minutes to tour the musty gee-gaw filled rooms, and a whopping 22 minutes to bake a loaf of bread.  That's 41 minutes of my life I am not willing to give away.

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The Mariah video is 22 minutes long?  Is part of it watching the bread rise in the oven?  Because what do those two have to talk about for 22 minutes?

I want to sneeze just looking at the interior of Lizzie's Faux-Plyg Heritage Inn and Rice Krispie Treat Boutique.  Add to that a couple of dogs roaming around and a potential run-in with a patchouli and B.O.-scented Mariah, and I'll take a hard pass.

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4 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

The Mariah video is 22 minutes long?  Is part of it watching the bread rise in the oven?  Because what do those two have to talk about for 22 minutes?

 Don't know, I bailed out just seeing how long it was. I can't tolerate a still photo let alone listen to them blather.

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Who among us didn't recall Meri's past indiscretion with a banana as we watched her peel those skins?

If I were her, I would have been searching my recipe files for something like lemon cranberry loaf instead of banana.

Edit to add:  I fully expected to hear her burst into a rousing chorus of Bonnie Raitt's (Let's Give Them) Something to Talk About while preparing the banana bread.  I think she's taunting us.

Edited by Sandy W
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I call BULLSHIT!! That they're making their own jam to sell on the website.  BULLSHIT! 

It's probably a third party company who puts the Lizzie's labels on their own jam. Just like you can go to Yosemite and buy Yosemite-branded strawberry preserves. 

Bullshit!!!

And she didn't even wash her hands. Covid or not, ya gotta wash your hands before cooking as far as I'm concerned.

Edited by DakotaJustice
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6 minutes ago, DakotaJustice said:

I call BULLSHIT!! That they're making their own jam to sell on the website.  BULLSHIT! 

It's probably a third party company who puts the Lizzie's labels on their own jam. Just like you can go to Yosemite and buy Yosemite-branded strawberry preserves. 

Bullshit!!!

And she didn't even wash her hands. Covid or not, ya gotta wash your hands before cooking as far as I'm concerned.

Rules may vary from State to State but I had a friend in CT that made jams and jellies and sold them at county fairs etc.  She was required to have a designated kitchen with 3 sinks for food destined for public consumption. She converted rooms in her carriage house for this purpose, she was also visited periodically by food inspectors.

I know a lot of the vendors that sell fudge, jam etc. at farmers markets do not abide by these restrictions, but they may be leaving themselves open to liability if the requirements are in place in their State.

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17 minutes ago, DakotaJustice said:

I call BULLSHIT!! That they're making their own jam to sell on the website.  BULLSHIT! 

It's probably a third party company who puts the Lizzie's labels on their own jam. Just like you can go to Yosemite and buy Yosemite-branded strawberry preserves. 

Bullshit!!!

And she didn't even wash her hands. Covid or not, ya gotta wash your hands before cooking as far as I'm concerned.

Shoot, you can even go to Buckingham Palace and buy Buckingham Palace Preserves.  3rd party company.  It’s normal.  And it’s unappetizing to see their lack of hygiene and thinking about eating something they’ve made.  Yuck. 

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2 hours ago, Sandy W said:

Rules may vary from State to State but I had a friend in CT that made jams and jellies and sold them at county fairs etc.  She was required to have a designated kitchen with 3 sinks for food destined for public consumption. She converted rooms in her carriage house for this purpose, she was also visited periodically by food inspectors.

I know a lot of the vendors that sell fudge, jam etc. at farmers markets do not abide by these restrictions, but they may be leaving themselves open to liability if the requirements are in place in their State.

The laws do vary by state and in some aspects quite considerably.  They are generally referred to as "cottage food laws".  I have a very small cottage food operation so I have looked into it for my state as well as a few states that are on my potential relocation destination list.  Here's a summary site but should not be relied on as authority.  It is a good source for consolidate links to individual states laws.  

https://www.pickyourown.org/CottageFoodLawsByState.htm

Here's another good summary site:

https://www.farmtoconsumer.org/cottage-foods-map/

Edited by sharkerbaby
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I folded at 7 minutes into the bread video. Meri has zero on-camera presence. None. Mariah's repetitive laughing during Meri's monologue adds nothing: uh huh huh huh huh, uh huh huh huh, uh huh huh huh, uh huh huh huh. Hey, if I listened to it you can read it - we're all in this together.

An off-camera voice plays a large role, not clear as to who that is. Audj, maybe?

The Lizzie's kitchen towels are the size of large receiving blankets, much too big to be practical IMO. The RK Treats are huuuge, the price almost makes sense. Almost.

Meri handled many items for sale and segued into the cooking segment without washing her hands or mentioning that normally she washes up before touching food.

The camera got moved in closer when the food prep began because they realized it was way too far back, and it didn't help much.

It did loosen the camera mount so a few sentences later it panned to the ceiling and stayed there until Mariah happened to notice. 

The sound went out for a few sentences after the camera got re-positioned and then it took Meri three tries to convince the blender to mash the bananas, and only after some manual assistance. 

That's where I gave up on Heckle and Jeckle Bake Banana Bread and decided my time would be better spent scooping the litter box. 

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@suomi, thank you for taking one for the team.  We all have to work through these videos together, so who gets the privilege of watching and reporting on the next one?  NOT IT!  Hahaha I called it first!

So how are all of you coming on your Lizzie's Heritage Inn Prairie Plyg Days of Yore Bingo Cards?  I myself am doing fairly well.  I chopped 50 pounds of firewood, scrubbed my entire family's laundry on a washboard, hauled 27 gallons of water from the well (two miles each way, both uphill) and plucked the feathers off a wild Canadian goose to re-stuff my pillow (I don't recommend that one)!  All I have to do is place an order for $100 worth of Bonnie's Potholders and I do believe I've got myself a Bingo!  

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21 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

@suomi, thank you for taking one for the team.  We all have to work through these videos together, so who gets the privilege of watching and reporting on the next one?  NOT IT!  Hahaha I called it first!

So how are all of you coming on your Lizzie's Heritage Inn Prairie Plyg Days of Yore Bingo Cards?  I myself am doing fairly well.  I chopped 50 pounds of firewood, scrubbed my entire family's laundry on a washboard, hauled 27 gallons of water from the well (two miles each way, both uphill) and plucked the feathers off a wild Canadian goose to re-stuff my pillow (I don't recommend that one)!  All I have to do is place an order for $100 worth of Bonnie's Potholders and I do believe I've got myself a Bingo!  

Damn!  You are ahead of me!  Let's see here... I white washed the outhouse and stocked up on dried corn cobs, canned 18 pounds of green beans, plowed 40 acres and planted winter onions, garlic, peas, broad beans, root vegetables, cabbage, collards and kale, replaced all of the straw tick in my family's mattresses and sewed rips and tears on everyone's clothes by tallow candlelight. and just sent a check for my order for 37 ugly Lularot leggings and matching face masks and 5 Brown Bobble head figures.  I decided to just buy the ones of Kody and the wives, and I already cleared a shelf so that I can display them, like Meri suggests on her website.  Robyn's bobble head can be used as a hanger for stockings at Christmas time.  Her chin is a perfect hook for the loop on the stocking.

You may THINK you have won the booty Laurakaye, but I have my eye on the prize and I covet that two night stay at Lizzie's.  I'm willing to win by the sweat of my brow..... so you may have to go catch and pluck a few more flocks of geese to beat THIS competitor!!!!!

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1 hour ago, absolutelyido said:

Whatever charm potential Lizzie's may have is completely lost with the 70's carpet and wallpaper. Both need to be ripped out.

Mariah’s bare feet and hairy pits stopped me cold.  No, I will not be ordering anything from Lizzie’s.

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3 hours ago, laurakaye said:

@suomi, thank you for taking one for the team.  We all have to work through these videos together, so who gets the privilege of watching and reporting on the next one?  NOT IT!  Hahaha I called it first!

So how are all of you coming on your Lizzie's Heritage Inn Prairie Plyg Days of Yore Bingo Cards?  I myself am doing fairly well.  I chopped 50 pounds of firewood, scrubbed my entire family's laundry on a washboard, hauled 27 gallons of water from the well (two miles each way, both uphill) and plucked the feathers off a wild Canadian goose to re-stuff my pillow (I don't recommend that one)!  All I have to do is place an order for $100 worth of Bonnie's Potholders and I do believe I've got myself a Bingo!  

Finger on my nose.  Not it!!

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I love pets but I think they don't belong where humans are preparing food or eating. It creeped me out when the black dog walked under the table when they were eating outside and his back rubbed the tablecloth. Hair and dander, plus parasites and urine and feces in the lawn where they sit and lie down and roll around. Barf.

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2 hours ago, absolutelyido said:

Whatever charm potential Lizzie's may have is completely lost with the 70's carpet and wallpaper. Both need to be ripped out.

Exactly my reaction. The carpet looks like it's filthy and falling apart. Carpet doesn't last forever. Not the mention the hideous green/blue colors. In fact, the whole place seems decrepit. There are plenty of quaint old house B&Bs, with hardwood floors and nicer finishings and furniture. I do like the quilts, but I am quite sure they don't launder them in between guests and dogs.

If I had a dog I would probably let him/her sleep on my bed. But that doesn't mean I'd want to pay to sleep in a bed that someone else's dog walked and lay down on!

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4 hours ago, Kyanight said:

Her chin is a perfect hook for the loop on the stocking.

You may THINK you have won the booty Laurakaye, but I have my eye on the prize and I covet that two night stay at Lizzie's.  I'm willing to win by the sweat of my brow..... so you may have to go catch and pluck a few more flocks of geese to beat THIS competitor!!!!!

The chin.....😂😂😂

 

(leaves to go build a log cabin with nothing but my bare hands, a stick and some yarn)

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2 hours ago, laurakaye said:

The chin.....😂😂😂

 

(leaves to go build a log cabin with nothing but my bare hands, a stick and some yarn)

Dayum.... I can't compete with that.   You win.  Well - only if you buy a poopload more knickknack paddywacks that you don't need!

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Well I hustled right over to Sarah's Corner to see if I could afford one of the Lemon Sugar Cookies and if I acted quickly enough, could take advantage of the limited time offer of free shipping.  

Dang, they're not up yet or maybe they've sold out already.🤪

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9 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

Dang, they're not up yet or maybe they've sold out already.🤪

They  should have had them on the site before announcing they were available on the site. Go figure. I just looked again, I was curious about the price,  they aren’t there.

Edited by ginger90
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2 hours ago, Sandy W said:

Well I hustled right over to Sarah's Corner to see if I could afford one of the Lemon Sugar Cookies and if I acted quickly enough, could take advantage of the limited time offer of free shipping.  

Dang, they're not up yet or maybe they've sold out already.🤪

$4.99 per cookie and No free shipping to Canada 

Meri says "Screw you Canadians!"

Her website sucks I tried to buy a couple to send to my sister and it wants you to enter an Apartment number but she lives in a house so it keeps jacking me around to enter an Apartment or suite number.

Edited by Dustbunny
clarity
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2 hours ago, DakotaJustice said:

Five bucks for a friggin' cookie?  I'll stick with Mrs. Fields.  

My thought exactly, $5 for a cookie!?!?!!!  😲

No thanks!.. But typical of her fans.. They're literally jumping with joy over the chance to get a lizzie cookie!... Bunch of Morons. 👎

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10 hours ago, Dustbunny said:

$4.99 per cookie and No free shipping to Canada 

What is up with shipping between Canada and the U.S.??  I can mail packages all over the world for reasonable rates - EXCEPT to Canada!!  I used to shop Amazon CA and Amazon UK because people sell things on those sites that you can't find on the U.S. Amazon site - except neither will ship to the U.S. because of the HIGH cost of postage.  I would have to arrange for an acquaintance in Canada to buy it and ship it to me - and then I would return the favor.   It doesn't make sense to me, why it is so expensive to ship packages either way.  What the heck???  We aren't that far apart!

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On 9/1/2020 at 5:58 AM, laurakaye said:

So how are all of you coming on your Lizzie's Heritage Inn Prairie Plyg Days of Yore Bingo Cards?  I myself am doing fairly well.  I chopped 50 pounds of firewood, scrubbed my entire family's laundry on a washboard, hauled 27 gallons of water from the well (two miles each way, both uphill) and plucked the feathers off a wild Canadian goose to re-stuff my pillow (I don't recommend that one)!  All I have to do is place an order for $100 worth of Bonnie's Potholders and I do believe I've got myself a Bingo!  

Wow, I really should have applied myself better, I was successful in uncorking a wine bottle, pouring it into a glass, walked 25 feet to my couch, reached at least an arms length for the remote and pressed the on button.

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13 hours ago, Kyanight said:

What is up with shipping between Canada and the U.S.?? 

I live in Canada and mail moves slowly because packages are subject to importation tariffs and duties and civil servants don't work weekends & holidays.  It is the same sending things from Canada to the US, so I hardly ever do it - I order things in the US to send to US friends & family.  Even if a $5 cookie is not subject to a duty or tariff, it waits in the line and may need an invasive species agriculture test. So a Lizzie cookie would arrive about 2 weeks after it was sent.  Not that I'd buy one; most frosting with designs on them tastes like library paste. If I am going to eat cookies, they must be fresh.

Edited by deirdra
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2 hours ago, Mahamid Frauded Me said:

I have rediscovered Famous Amos chocolate chip cookies and they in turn have discovered my butt - 

 

Reminds me of that great line in the Mary Tyler Moore show when Rhoda said about a piece of candy:  "I don't know why I'm putting this in my mouth.  I should apply it directly to my hips."

Story of my life.

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13 hours ago, ginger90 said:

114D5A23-B597-47B3-A739-DF5BAF96A741.jpeg

She says she's SORRY? 🤣 When?!? 

Yeah, we get it, Meri. You're allowed your "privacy", mainly after you piss someone off or insult someone and need to hide behind those walls of yours (to give you time for "forgive" them for making you angry). TIP: if you want privacy, GTF offline.

What. A. Narcissist. Some things never change. 

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1 minute ago, Sandy W said:

Deep Thoughts from Meri Brown.  She has gone all philosophical to her fan base.

Sandy - and THAT'S IT - SPOT ON!

Meri and Janelle and Mariah have this fan base who they believe hangs on every word they utter, every action they take, every food they eat, every new scary veggie they encounter!  So now they think they are like some reality show gurus or something and they need to spout deep (ridiculous) wisdom on a daily basis.

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5 minutes ago, Kyanight said:

Sandy - and THAT'S IT - SPOT ON!

Meri and Janelle and Mariah have this fan base who they believe hangs on every word they utter, every action they take, every food they eat, every new scary veggie they encounter!  So now they think they are like some reality show gurus or something and they need to spout deep (ridiculous) wisdom on a daily basis.

Meri revels in any kind of attention.  Testimony to this is the sweatshirt she was sporting last week, printed with something like:- "So apparently I'm dramatic".  There was a public figure some time ago that declared:- "Say anything you want about me, just spell my name right".  Meri reminds me of him.

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2 hours ago, ginger90 said:

03DAA961-80D7-4876-A3FE-9CC974DF7A58.jpeg

Judging by the little circle over the "i" (normally not used by anyone over 12), Meri stole her list of profundities from morganharpernichols

Edited by deirdra
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16 hours ago, ginger90 said:

03DAA961-80D7-4876-A3FE-9CC974DF7A58.jpeg

Wtf does that even mean?

She's choosing to trust that she hasn't been forgotten by WHO?

Because if she means kody I think she's sadly mistaken, since the day he crawled into Robins bed or even before that he's been acting like "Meri who??"

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59 minutes ago, Joan of Argh said:

Wtf does that even mean?

She's choosing to trust that she hasn't been forgotten by WHO?

Because if she means kody I think she's sadly mistaken, since the day he crawled into Robins bed or even before that he's been acting like "Meri who??"

She's choosing to trust that she is not forgotten by her loyal fan base.

By posting these poignant missives, she arouses deep feelings of empathy and supportive, rallying cries of "you GO girl"..."Love ya Meri", "You GOT this girl" blah, blah, blah.

Meri may not be the brightest button in the box, but she does understand an important marketing tool.  The more people that identify with you, the more $$$ in your pocket.  Everyone wants to support the brave underdog and this is how she has chosen to portray herself.

Edited by Sandy W
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