Small Talk: The Polygamous Cul-de-Sac

[SunnyBeBe]

On 11/20/2021 at 12:09 PM, WhatAmIWatching said:

  My husband is having hip replacement surgery next month, and I was curious if anyone here has had one, (or cared for someone who had one), and had any advice as we do this?

I'm a little nervous because they recently found that he has a small ascending aortic aneurysm, and some sort of small 1" mass in his chest between the heart and chest wall (it didn't light up on a PET scan, so it's not cancer, thank goodness).

 He's getting the hip done before they figure out what the mass is. They would have to crack him open to see what it is, and don't really want to do that, so we're on track to see a cardio oncology surgeon after the hip stuff to see what to do. (My kinda antivax MIL has decided that the mass and aneurysm is from the vaccine 🙄.)

   They've initially said the aneurysm is a keep-an-eye-on-it issue, and he will need scans every few months, which is a great relief, but feels like a ticking bomb, too. His warranty has apparently expired as he's now needing many repairs😆 

Timing, as always, is bad as my latest back mri is showing severe nerve squish above my previously installed hardware, which explains the new numbs and pain intensity. (Doc wants me to consult with a surgeon after some injections next month, ugh, AND she wants to revisit how much my neck site and hardware has degraded, due to new crazy pain and numbs topside, too--my own warranty was up years ago 😆)

   But! pain is nothing compared to his heart and hip stuff, so I can put me on the back burner. I don't want any more surgery anyway, unless it's critical, or they can make me bionic ha! 

Sorry for the rambles and stress word vomit. I appreciate the ear since I feel a need to be stoic and logical irl. Oct and Nov have been quite the months! I must've made the universe mad. (Our well pump also decided to work only sometimes, but it was not too expensive to fix, whew! There's the car issues, too. Lol it's just all so ridiculous)

  I'm a little overwhelmed and exhausted right now, but am working to stay positive, hopeful and find the funny in the circus of my life.

I’m sorry to read about your medical situations.  It’s sounds daunting.  I don’t have Personal experience with hip replacement, but I do know several people who have had the procedure and it worked well for them.  Sending you positive thoughts and well wishes for a good recovery for your husband.  Do you have someone who can help you?  Will he go to rehab to help with the immediate care?  I hope you’ll get some more input from others who have been through it.  🙏

Edited November 21, 2021 by SunnyBeBe

[lookeyloo]

2 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

  My husband is having hip replacement surgery next month, and I was curious if anyone here has had one, (or cared for someone who had one), and had any advice as we do this?

I'm a little nervous because they recently found that he has a small ascending aortic aneurysm, and some sort of small 1" mass in his chest between the heart and chest wall (it didn't light up on a PET scan, so it's not cancer, thank goodness).

 He's getting the hip done before they figure out what the mass is. They would have to crack him open to see what it is, and don't really want to do that, so we're on track to see a cardio oncology surgeon after the hip stuff to see what to do. (My kinda antivax MIL has decided that the mass and aneurysm is from the vaccine 🙄.)

   They've initially said the aneurysm is a keep-an-eye-on-it issue, and he will need scans every few months, which is a great relief, but feels like a ticking bomb, too. His warranty has apparently expired as he's now needing many repairs😆 

Timing, as always, is bad as my latest back mri is showing severe nerve squish above my previously installed hardware, which explains the new numbs and pain intensity. (Doc wants me to consult with a surgeon after some injections next month, ugh, AND she wants to revisit how much my neck site and hardware has degraded, due to new crazy pain and numbs topside, too--my own warranty was up years ago 😆)

   But! pain is nothing compared to his heart and hip stuff, so I can put me on the back burner. I don't want any more surgery anyway, unless it's critical, or they can make me bionic ha! 

Sorry for the rambles and stress word vomit. I appreciate the ear since I feel a need to be stoic and logical irl. Oct and Nov have been quite the months! I must've made the universe mad. (Our well pump also decided to work only sometimes, but it was not too expensive to fix, whew! There's the car issues, too. Lol it's just all so ridiculous)

  I'm a little overwhelmed and exhausted right now, but am working to stay positive, hopeful and find the funny in the circus of my life.

I had a hip replacement in 2009.  I did the exercises beforehand and did ALL the  physical therapy afterwards whether I felt like it or not.  They had me out of bed next day.  FF to today.  I am still doing well although the actual device has had issues.  The surgeon said he wasn't ever one to hop on a new device bandwagon and mine was the best then.  But right now I am fine and don't plan on anything elective unless it becomes required.  I'm almost 78 so hoping I can outlive any potential issues personal to me!!  It was still one of the best things I've done for myself since I couldn't take a step without pain and it really limited what I could do which was not much.  Hoping that other issue husband has resolves easily.  

[Absolom]

2 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I can’t seem to locate N95 masks that have loops around the ears. They all seem to wrap around the head.  I bought a box like that, but they were very uncomfortable. So small like for a child, but were not.  I returned them as unwearable.  I see KN95 like I want, but I don’t want to have to wear 2 pieces.

Just wear the KN95 masks.  It's the same filtration as an N95 just another country's standard.  I don't think N95s are made with ear loops.  I haven't seen any.  You don't need a cloth mask AND an N95 or KN95.

Edited November 20, 2021 by Absolom

[WhatAmIWatching]

3 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I can’t seem to locate N95 masks that have loops around the ears. They all seem to wrap around the head.  I bought a box like that, but they were very uncomfortable. So small like for a child, but were not.  I returned them as unwearable.  I see KN95 like I want, but I don’t want to have to wear 2 pieces.  

I have KN95's and have read a lot about them, and they are basically fine on their own, as long as you're not in a medical setting and caring for covid positive patients. You'll want to find tested or verified brands, as there are a lot of knockoffs sent over from China that don't have the same protections. My friend ordered masks from Project 95 and found good prices.

 

Thank you for your kind words! It'll be me taking care of him here at home, but he's a tough old dog, and our house is small and one floor, so we should be fine. I want to keep any covid risk as small as possible, though we are vaccinated, as he's extremely high risk. His brother and fam, a nephew and his mom all live nearby, so if I need help with the old grouch, I do have people to call. I think his sis is coming out for a visit around the same time, so I'll enlist her muscles if needed.

  I think the hardest part may be keeping him down and still, especially if his pain is less than what he's been living with for the last few years!

[WhatAmIWatching]

2 hours ago, lookeyloo said:

I had a hip replacement in 2009.  I did the exercises beforehand and did ALL the  physical therapy afterwards whether I felt like it or not.  They had me out of bed next day.  FF to today.  I am still doing well although the actual device has had issues.  The surgeon said he wasn't ever one to hop on a new device bandwagon and mine was the best then.  But right now I am fine and don't plan on anything elective unless it becomes required.  I'm almost 78 so hoping I can outlive any potential issues personal to me!!  It was still one of the best things I've done for myself since I couldn't take a step without pain and it really limited what I could do which was not much.  Hoping that other issue husband has resolves easily.  

Ooo thank you, thank you! It's good to hear yours went well, except for device issues, and that you had great relief! That eases my mind a lot.
He's got the prehab on Mon and the videos for exercises assigned. He did really well with a knee surgery around 7 years ago, so I'm hoping his healing and everything goes as smoothly. 

 I'm thinking he will have enormous pain relief once it's done, as his hip is so bad the ball is actually fusing to the socket right now, and chock full of stenosis. The surgeon said he's surprised he's still mobile.

  He can't bend well at all on that side, but still does all his work, and climbs ladders, and into his dump truck, so he's found a way to manage. He's 63, so hopefully this is a one and done. The doc said he'll be able to even his legs up, too, as there's always been about an inch discrepancy. He was supposed to do it 2019, and then changed jobs, so we rescheduled to last year, but the world exploded, so 3rd time charm I guess lol.

 

   I'm hoping the heart stuff stays at just keeping an eye! I'm so grateful there's no cancer or anything urgently needing intervention right now. That's been a huge relief.  I'm glad for the pulled muscle in his back, that caused chest pains, so we could find the other issues. We wouldn't have known otherwise.

[Teafortwo]

5 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

  My husband is having hip replacement surgery next month, and I was curious if anyone here has had one, (or cared for someone who had one), and had any advice as we do this?

I'm a little nervous because they recently found that he has a small ascending aortic aneurysm, and some sort of small 1" mass in his chest between the heart and chest wall (it didn't light up on a PET scan, so it's not cancer, thank goodness).

 He's getting the hip done before they figure out what the mass is. They would have to crack him open to see what it is, and don't really want to do that, so we're on track to see a cardio oncology surgeon after the hip stuff to see what to do. (My kinda antivax MIL has decided that the mass and aneurysm is from the vaccine 🙄.)

   They've initially said the aneurysm is a keep-an-eye-on-it issue, and he will need scans every few months, which is a great relief, but feels like a ticking bomb, too. His warranty has apparently expired as he's now needing many repairs😆 

Timing, as always, is bad as my latest back mri is showing severe nerve squish above my previously installed hardware, which explains the new numbs and pain intensity. (Doc wants me to consult with a surgeon after some injections next month, ugh, AND she wants to revisit how much my neck site and hardware has degraded, due to new crazy pain and numbs topside, too--my own warranty was up years ago 😆)

   But! pain is nothing compared to his heart and hip stuff, so I can put me on the back burner. I don't want any more surgery anyway, unless it's critical, or they can make me bionic ha! 

Sorry for the rambles and stress word vomit. I appreciate the ear since I feel a need to be stoic and logical irl. Oct and Nov have been quite the months! I must've made the universe mad. (Our well pump also decided to work only sometimes, but it was not too expensive to fix, whew! There's the car issues, too. Lol it's just all so ridiculous)

  I'm a little overwhelmed and exhausted right now, but am working to stay positive, hopeful and find the funny in the circus of my life.

Best wishes to you and your husband for the surgery and hkpefully a speedy recovery. I hope you can address your own painful back issues soon too!  It sounds overwhelming but I'm glad to know you have family nearby to help. <3

Please give us updates when you have time. Thinking of you!

 

[WhatAmIWatching]

1 minute ago, Teafortwo said:

Best wishes to you and your husband for the surgery and hkpefully a speedy recovery. I hope you can address your own painful back issues soon too!  It sounds overwhelming but I'm glad to know you have family nearby to help. <3

Please give us updates when you have time. Thinking of you!

 

Thank you, sending hugs! 
I'm avoiding dealing with my back as long as I can, lol. All I wish for is a little less pain so I can think, and I'm good to go.
 I will definitely update! His surgery is scheduled for the 15th. A new hip will be a nice xmas present. I should stick a bow to him after it's done. Haha

[TurtlePower]

15 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

Thank you, sending hugs! 
I'm avoiding dealing with my back as long as I can, lol. All I wish for is a little less pain so I can think, and I'm good to go.
 I will definitely update! His surgery is scheduled for the 15th. A new hip will be a nice xmas present. I should stick a bow to him after it's done. Haha

I’m so sorry about your back!! I’ve been there—2 surgeries when I was just 20 and working on a 3rd right now (that’s what I get for being a wilderness rescue ranger). It’s so hard to deal with when you’re in pain and there’s not much you can do about it and you just want it to stop. I’m stubborn and workout through the pain and tingling because I’m terrified of losing strength (and gaining weight). 

Hugs! I truly understand what you’re dealing with. I hope you can find some relief soon. 

[NoWhammies]

On 9/13/2021 at 6:17 AM, WhatAmIWatching said:

Yes! Yes they do! My husband is a truck driver. He used to haul cryogenics; has done long haul, and is now driving a dump truck. They have CB radios, and when I'd go with him to work, I'd listen to he and his coworkers chatting with each other, and they were a gossipy bunch!

Yup - my hubby is the most gossipy person I know. NO idea why that popped up as something I hadn't read before since now I see it is from 9/13. The internet is weird, y'all.

Edited November 21, 2021 by NoWhammies

[iwantcookies]

Let me ask: Is this common.
 

Do your acquaintances share very intimate/private thoughts with you? I  met this lady a few months ago. She tells me such personal things, I am not comfortable at all! I try to avoid her and be like oh hi Sally. I’m busy got to go. But it’s not helping. I’m not married and she is, her personal thoughts are about her marriage. I am at loss at how to politely to tell her stop telling me these things. 

[Yeah No]

On 11/20/2021 at 1:45 PM, SunnyBeBe said:

I can’t seem to locate N95 masks that have loops around the ears. They all seem to wrap around the head.  I bought a box like that, but they were very uncomfortable. So small like for a child, but were not.  I returned them as unwearable.  I see KN95 like I want, but I don’t want to have to wear 2 pieces.  

I did a bit of research on this a while back.  Unless you work in a Covid ward or are a surgeon KN95s are sufficient.  The difference in protection against Covid is exceedingly minor if they are an FDA approved brand for medical use.  The KN95s are sufficient for filtering out Covid particles which is the goal.  The finer filtration of the N95 is for tiny particles usually encountered in construction work, not the fluid particles encountered in most medical situations unless you are a surgeon.

I find the N95s uncomfortable for the same reason.  The headbands never fit right and slid around on my hair, plus they left my hair a mess.  They are also pretty suffocating in anything but cold weather.

Thanks to @Teafortwo for posting the link to Bona-Fide Masks several months ago.  They sell Powecom KN95s, which is the FDA Covid approved brand I trust.  There are a lot of imitators and even counterfeits out there so they have a special validation sticker on each package that you can check on their website for authenticity.

I tried making earloops out of my N95 mask headbands for a while and it did work, although it was still a little awkward.  I cut the bands and tied them into loops.  So I suppose you could do that but the N95s are so much more expensive and annoying in other ways I don't use them much anymore.  If I am in a very tight and worrisome situation I take along a regular surgical mask and double mask it with a KN95.  Like when I go to the doctor's office.  Otherwise I don't feel that I need the extra mask.  Actually I like the double mask with the KN95 better than a single N95 anyway.

[WhatAmIWatching]

On 11/21/2021 at 8:17 AM, TurtlePower said:

I’m so sorry about your back!! I’ve been there—2 surgeries when I was just 20 and working on a 3rd right now (that’s what I get for being a wilderness rescue ranger). It’s so hard to deal with when you’re in pain and there’s not much you can do about it and you just want it to stop. I’m stubborn and workout through the pain and tingling because I’m terrified of losing strength (and gaining weight). 

Hugs! I truly understand what you’re dealing with. I hope you can find some relief soon. 

I admire you so much for your strength and determination to push through it all! (Omg possibly a 3rd go? Oof that's awful) You are impressive and so focused! I wish you could send some of your grit to me.
I don't sit much and do try to walk, (we have some acres, but I also got a little basic treadmill), but I don't last long because the pain and even the numbing gets so sharp I can't think. (It's like when we're in the car and the music is too loud and I yell to my husband to turn it down because I can't see.)

I have a ton of lbs I need to drop, and it all feels impossible right now, and I'm always so exhausted, so I end up hating myself. I'm very hopeful that we'll soon take things down a few notches so I can be more human again. I can live with big pain, and have for many years, it's when new pain crops up that I lose my footing for a while.  ( I joke that I was a real asshole in a previous life, because in this one I have a lot of separate issues that each cause heavy chronic pain.) I am very thankful that it's 'just' pain, and nothing life threatening. 

This is why I watch a lot of crap tv! It gives me an escape for a bit. I can (inelegantly) climb on my high horse and judge them all, and say that while I have a handful of poo to deal with right now, at least I'm not one of the Browns and all the dysfunction that entails.(or Erika Jayne or Jen Shah..) 

[WhatAmIWatching]

8 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

Let me ask: Is this common.
 

Do your acquaintances share very intimate/private thoughts with you? I  met this lady a few months ago. She tells me such personal things, I am not comfortable at all! I try to avoid her and be like oh hi Sally. I’m busy got to go. But it’s not helping. I’m not married and she is, her personal thoughts are about her marriage. I am at loss at how to politely to tell her stop telling me these things. 

My close friends do, but not casual acquaintances. How odd and cringey!

If you can say it, I've found that saying "I'm surprised you feel comfortable saying (sharing) that!" can stop over shares. If it doesn't, you expand that to "Because I'm not comfortable hearing it, though I do really enjoy our chats on other subjects"

(The modification when people ask very intrusive questions is: "I'm surprised you feel comfortable asking that" and then you just look at them without saying another word.)

 

[TurtlePower]

2 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

I admire you so much for your strength and determination to push through it all! (Omg possibly a 3rd go? Oof that's awful) You are impressive and so focused! I wish you could send some of your grit to me.
I don't sit much and do try to walk, (we have some acres, but I also got a little basic treadmill), but I don't last long because the pain and even the numbing gets so sharp I can't think. (It's like when we're in the car and the music is too loud and I yell to my husband to turn it down because I can't see.)

I have a ton of lbs I need to drop, and it all feels impossible right now, and I'm always so exhausted, so I end up hating myself. I'm very hopeful that we'll soon take things down a few notches so I can be more human again. I can live with big pain, and have for many years, it's when new pain crops up that I lose my footing for a while.  ( I joke that I was a real asshole in a previous life, because in this one I have a lot of separate issues that each cause heavy chronic pain.) I am very thankful that it's 'just' pain, and nothing life threatening. 

This is why I watch a lot of crap tv! It gives me an escape for a bit. I can (inelegantly) climb on my high horse and judge them all, and say that while I have a handful of poo to deal with right now, at least I'm not one of the Browns and all the dysfunction that entails.(or Erika Jayne or Jen Shah..) 

Awwwwww lots of hugs!!! It’s definitely hard when so many things seem stacked against you and it’s overwhelming. Trying to drop weight, while beneficial for spine problems, is made more difficult by stress and pain. I myself can gain weight easily so I have to be ridiculously strict—I gained weight 4 years ago following a knee injury and it was SO hard to drop it and it felt like forever—very disheartening and I hated myself, too. Like, how could this have happened to me? It was hard. And now I have to be very strict. 

Next spring I’ll probably take to the ocean and incorporate swimming for variety. I also love my indoor cycle which really doesn’t hurt my back too much. But yeah, my surgeon has warned me not to lift ANYTHING, so no more working with free weights, no more barbell curls. Push-ups-yes, planks-yes, anything body-weight related is ok but he doesn’t even want me lifting groceries. He said the more I do that, the sooner I’ll be on the table. I almost just wanna get it over with. 

 

[iwantcookies]

3 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

My close friends do, but not casual acquaintances. How odd and cringey!

If you can say it, I've found that saying "I'm surprised you feel comfortable saying (sharing) that!" can stop over shares. If it doesn't, you expand that to "Because I'm not comfortable hearing it, though I do really enjoy our chats on other subjects"

(The modification when people ask very intrusive questions is: "I'm surprised you feel comfortable asking that" and then you just look at them without saying another word.)

 

She moved to USA 5-6 years ago. Maybe it’s okay to over share in her culture?

I had several women share all sorts of super private things. I feel like a therapist. I don’t need to know all that! 2 told me they wish their husbands would die! And that’s the nicest confessions. Aaahhh help lol.

And I should stop complaining at that! 

Edited November 22, 2021 by iwantcookies

[Yeah No]

3 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

I have a ton of lbs I need to drop, and it all feels impossible right now, and I'm always so exhausted, so I end up hating myself. I'm very hopeful that we'll soon take things down a few notches so I can be more human again. I can live with big pain, and have for many years, it's when new pain crops up that I lose my footing for a while.  ( I joke that I was a real asshole in a previous life, because in this one I have a lot of separate issues that each cause heavy chronic pain.) I am very thankful that it's 'just' pain, and nothing life threatening. 

This is why I watch a lot of crap tv! It gives me an escape for a bit. I can (inelegantly) climb on my high horse and judge them all, and say that while I have a handful of poo to deal with right now, at least I'm not one of the Browns and all the dysfunction that entails.(or Erika Jayne or Jen Shah..) 

Many hugs, I hear you about the weight gain and difficulty losing.  Since menopause I've followed the female side of my family in that tendency.  Before that I didn't have a weight issue at all.  The problem is that nothing will work short of starvation by now.  I could exercise all day and eat healthy and small portions but it doesn't work.  Then I recently got the results of a DNA test that specializes in medical conditions which told me that I do indeed have the "fat gene" which means I have a greater tendency to be overweight.  I can just imagine how heavy I would be if I didn't eat healthy and sensibly.  The only problem is the attendant medical conditions that being obese causes.  It's not even about how I look anymore so much as how this is going to potentially shorten my life and impact the quality of my life.  It is already in many ways including cholesterol, fatty liver, etc.  Plus since my gallbladder removal a few years ago my gut is always an issue.  I never had any kind of digestive issues until then.  And of course my doctor has not been able to uncover the cause of my distress.  My metabolic and liver numbers are supposedly OK, we ruled out Celiac (my DNA showed a gene to suggest I was at higher risk), so I don't know what else to do.  I take supplements like probiotics, liver cleanse, etc.  We just have to keep trying.   And I am going to sign up for my hospital's medical weight loss clinic.  Not for surgery but perhaps anything else they can help me with.

And speaking of pain, I also am having back issues now, and never did before.  I am now hesitant to take Tylenol because they say it's especially bad for people with liver issues.  Which kind of screws me over because I am deathly allergic to Ibuprofen, aspirin, Alleve and anything considered a "salicylate".  Other than what they prescribe in the hospital there isn't much else.  Also can't take perco-anything (percocet, percodan, etc.) because they make me very sick to my stomach.  So I hear you, and hope to be as supportive of your issues as I can.

Edited November 22, 2021 by Yeah No

[iwantcookies]

3 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

I admire you so much for your strength and determination to push through it all! (Omg possibly a 3rd go? Oof that's awful) You are impressive and so focused! I wish you could send some of your grit to me.
I don't sit much and do try to walk, (we have some acres, but I also got a little basic treadmill), but I don't last long because the pain and even the numbing gets so sharp I can't think. (It's like when we're in the car and the music is too loud and I yell to my husband to turn it down because I can't see.)

I have a ton of lbs I need to drop, and it all feels impossible right now, and I'm always so exhausted, so I end up hating myself. I'm very hopeful that we'll soon take things down a few notches so I can be more human again. I can live with big pain, and have for many years, it's when new pain crops up that I lose my footing for a while.  ( I joke that I was a real asshole in a previous life, because in this one I have a lot of separate issues that each cause heavy chronic pain.) I am very thankful that it's 'just' pain, and nothing life threatening. 

This is why I watch a lot of crap tv! It gives me an escape for a bit. I can (inelegantly) climb on my high horse and judge them all, and say that while I have a handful of poo to deal with right now, at least I'm not one of the Browns and all the dysfunction that entails.(or Erika Jayne or Jen Shah..) 

Please be kind to yourself! Losing weight is HARD. Did you get tested for sleep apnea? I’m sorry you are in pain!
 

it’s dark by 5 pm and all I want is a big bowl of food and sleep. I’m like a hibernating bear. 
 

I force myself to go to the gym and eat veggies and fruit daily. It’s hard for me to eat healthy foods! I rather eat pasta and donuts lol. Too bad that’s not a healthy food group!
 

 

[WhatAmIWatching]

2 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

She moved to USA 5-6 years ago. Maybe it’s okay to over share in her culture?

I had several women share all sorts of super private things. I feel like a therapist. I don’t need to know all that! 2 told me they wish their husbands would die! And that’s the nicest confessions. Aaahhh help lol.

And I should stop complaining at that! 

Oh my, I hope they never ask you to give an alibi! Lol that's wild. I think SM has caused a lot of the over sharing, it's so normalized nowadays. It's so uncomfortable and whoa sometimes! (As I proceed to overshare about my crazy life, lol. oh irony I luv ya)

 

Thank you for everyone's kind words and advice/shares. I feel more motivated and less whiny now. Menopause and a crotchety thyroid are great humblers. On one hand, I want to strive (lol) to get to a healthier weight, but on the other hand, I'm already a fatty, so why not have cake? 
 

TurtlePower, exactly! I'm not supposed to bend at all, and no sitting  or lying down too long; no  carrying or picking up anything (not even the cats), no sweeping or vacuuming..basically no life whatsoever. I guess I'm just to hang immobile on a coat hook? I simply can't follow most of it. Who else would do everything? I'm not as careful as I should be, and I'm overly flexible, which doesn't help.

YeahNo: I have also had the gallbladder removal, and can trace some issues to that exact moment. I wish there was more info on how that affects a body, besides learning to never, ever again trust a fart 😆. I'm thinking on doing the dna test specifically to find which antidepressants will work, because nothing we've tried in years has helped. It's so cool that they can really pinpoint so much with our dna.

I do look for every positive in all the mess, and try to be thankful for all the good stuff in my life-and there's a lot. My brain is sort of a Pollyanna, which gets on my nerves, but does keep me hopeful, trucking along, and finding the funny where I can.

 

iwantcookies: we were just talking about sleep study/apnea test! My husband tells me I snore so loud now, like a forest full of chainsaws, which is also new. waiting until after the new year to tackle that, once some dust gets settled from his medical things.
Right there with you and the wanting to sleep as soon as it's dark. It's  always shocking to discover it's only 7pm when it feels like midnight! Too bad we aren't bears, then being fatter would be a good thing 😆 

[Absolom]

2 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Plus since my gallbladder removal a few years ago my gut is always an issue.  I never had any kind of digestive issues until then.

Fat and products made with tomato paste are the usual culprits.  Try watching fat closely especially deep fried foods and avoid anything that includes tomato paste for a week and see if you improve.  After that you can test your limits.  Deep fried foods and fatty meat are usually the worst fat problems.   At least 10% of people who have their gallbladder removed have to watch the tomato paste issue.  

My daughter's MIL complained about her digestive woes after gallbladder removal and said she'd been to six doctors who couldn't help her.  My daughter said let me cook for you for the remainder of your visit.  Instant cure.  Her MIL said I'm calling all those doctors to tell them off.  They should have known!  

[deirdra]

5 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

I had several women share all sorts of super private things. I feel like a therapist. I don’t need to know all that! 2 told me they wish their husbands would die!

and more work for you if you end up as a witness for the prosecution if one of the  husbands ends up missing or murdered

[iwantcookies]

3 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

Oh my, I hope they never ask you to give an alibi! Lol that's wild. I think SM has caused a lot of the over sharing, it's so normalized nowadays. It's so uncomfortable and whoa sometimes! (As I proceed to overshare about my crazy life, lol. oh irony I luv ya)

 

Thank you for everyone's kind words and advice/shares. I feel more motivated and less whiny now. Menopause and a crotchety thyroid are great humblers. On one hand, I want to strive (lol) to get to a healthier weight, but on the other hand, I'm already a fatty, so why not have cake? 
 

TurtlePower, exactly! I'm not supposed to bend at all, and no sitting  or lying down too long; no  carrying or picking up anything (not even the cats), no sweeping or vacuuming..basically no life whatsoever. I guess I'm just to hang immobile on a coat hook? I simply can't follow most of it. Who else would do everything? I'm not as careful as I should be, and I'm overly flexible, which doesn't help.

YeahNo: I have also had the gallbladder removal, and can trace some issues to that exact moment. I wish there was more info on how that affects a body, besides learning to never, ever again trust a fart 😆. I'm thinking on doing the dna test specifically to find which antidepressants will work, because nothing we've tried in years has helped. It's so cool that they can really pinpoint so much with our dna.

I do look for every positive in all the mess, and try to be thankful for all the good stuff in my life-and there's a lot. My brain is sort of a Pollyanna, which gets on my nerves, but does keep me hopeful, trucking along, and finding the funny where I can.

 

iwantcookies: we were just talking about sleep study/apnea test! My husband tells me I snore so loud now, like a forest full of chainsaws, which is also new. waiting until after the new year to tackle that, once some dust gets settled from his medical things.
Right there with you and the wanting to sleep as soon as it's dark. It's  always shocking to discover it's only 7pm when it feels like midnight! Too bad we aren't bears, then being fatter would be a good thing 😆 

It’s not on SM all heard in real life 😂🤪🎁. Well all these confessions made me realize being single isn’t that bad! 

[Yeah No]

6 hours ago, Absolom said:

Fat and products made with tomato paste are the usual culprits.  Try watching fat closely especially deep fried foods and avoid anything that includes tomato paste for a week and see if you improve.  After that you can test your limits.  Deep fried foods and fatty meat are usually the worst fat problems.   At least 10% of people who have their gallbladder removed have to watch the tomato paste issue.  

My daughter's MIL complained about her digestive woes after gallbladder removal and said she'd been to six doctors who couldn't help her.  My daughter said let me cook for you for the remainder of your visit.  Instant cure.  Her MIL said I'm calling all those doctors to tell them off.  They should have known!  

That's the thing, I know what to eat and what to avoid and I'm still in this boat.  I don't have a problem with tomato products.  I've read some do and some don't.  Thankfully I don't, even with stuff made with tomato paste.  I never ate much in the way of fried foods, I have always been on a diet where I avoid those things and eat only the leanest of meat and seafood.  I don't even eat chocolate.  OK, maybe a tiny size Milky Way Midnight every now and then.  Once a week.  I love to cook and know how to make healthy food interesting.  I'm well read on what's in everything and pay close attention to what's going into my body.  And yet here I am.  

[Absolom]

IBS-D?  Trying avoiding FODMAPS?  We went through this last year and my daughter had developed gluten intolerance to go with her lactose intolerance that she'd had for years.  Mostly what I can recommend at this point is a food diary to try to narrow down which foods or food groups it is.  I admit she fought me on trying it, but two weeks on the FODMAP diet and she was much better.  I'm not saying that's what you need, but it's worth a try if nothing else is working.  Then the 50,000 question are you of an age to get a colonoscopy and if so have you had one recently?  

I've been down this road and I really don't want to get into what I went through and have, but what I ended up having is extremely serious so don't let yourself get fobbed off.  

[Teafortwo]

21 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

Let me ask: Is this common.
 

Do your acquaintances share very intimate/private thoughts with you? I  met this lady a few months ago. She tells me such personal things, I am not comfortable at all! I try to avoid her and be like oh hi Sally. I’m busy got to go. But it’s not helping. I’m not married and she is, her personal thoughts are about her marriage. I am at loss at how to politely to tell her stop telling me these things. 

I used to have a friend who did this - someone I knew from long before her marriage. I finally put a stop to it when I learned she was basically pulling a Meri with a guy she briefly dated during college. It was before sexting - so they (she and her ex-flirtation) emailed. I felt so bad for her husband, who was so much nicer than she. She would go on and on about how he didn't turn her on but this old not-even-a-flame did.  How did I put a stop to it? I stopped communicating with her entirely.

There were some other shitty things she did that caused me to do so - but I think it's justified to just cut someone like that off.

[Yeah No]

18 minutes ago, Absolom said:

IBS-D?  Trying avoiding FODMAPS?  We went through this last year and my daughter had developed gluten intolerance to go with her lactose intolerance that she'd had for years.  Mostly what I can recommend at this point is a food diary to try to narrow down which foods or food groups it is.  I admit she fought me on trying it, but two weeks on the FODMAP diet and she was much better.  I'm not saying that's what you need, but it's worth a try if nothing else is working.  Then the 50,000 question are you of an age to get a colonoscopy and if so have you had one recently?  

I've been down this road and I really don't want to get into what I went through and have, but what I ended up having is extremely serious so don't let yourself get fobbed off.  

What I suspect I have are recurring attacks of GERD that can last a month or so at a time and happen maybe twice a year, which give me bad indigestion on just about any food but the most bland, non-acidic foods.  And while I'm in that state I can't eat much in the way of dairy or even tea.  I don't drink coffee.  Even when not in that state I've cut my caffeinated tea down to one cup a day in the morning.  And no carbonated drinks except a flavored seltzer every now and then.  I can experience gut issues other times but not as bad.

I also suspect I will have such an attack if the perfect storm of circumstances is present at the time.  It's very hard to prevent them because there are so many factors, not all of which are under my control.  It could happen because my liver is producing sludge bile that is not making it out of the bile duct too well.  It could be because of stuff I've eaten cumulatively, although as I say I'm pretty careful about that.  It could also happen when I'm under stress, a combination of things.  I don't experience heartburn, don't even know what it feels like, but I'm told you can have "silent reflux" without symptoms.  I want to know what I have and am trying to work with my gastro. to find out.  

Edited November 23, 2021 by Yeah No

[Teafortwo]

9 hours ago, Yeah No said:

  Plus since my gallbladder removal a few years ago my gut is always an issue.  I never had any kind of digestive issues until then.

No Plexus for you!!

(But seriously, gut issues are so tough, I feel for you, that's awful)

[Yeah No]

2 minutes ago, Teafortwo said:

No Plexus for you!!

(But seriously, gut issues are so tough, I feel for you, that's awful)

Thanks, LOL on the Plexus!  Until my doctor can tell me what's going on in there it's going to be hard for me to know how to solve the problem.  And that might take a while.  He's supposed to send me for an ultrasound soon.

[SunnyBeBe]

Not trying to be insensitive about weight loss attempts, but I saw this video and for some reason the leggings theme reminded me of Meri….and Janelle a little.  Actually, it also reminded me of myself too on Thanksgiving. 😝 Though, I don’t Serra LulaRoe.  The video is for charity..so, that’s good too. 
 

 

 

[TurtlePower]

9 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Not trying to be insensitive about weight loss attempts, but I saw this video and for some reason the leggings theme reminded me of Meri….and Janelle a little.  Actually, it also reminded me of myself too on Thanksgiving. 😝 Though, I don’t Serra LulaRoe.  The video is for charity..so, that’s good too. 
 

 

 

Ok this so funny! It made me remember watching a video of a woman who wore LLR leggings for so long she gained weight and could not fit in her jeans anymore (I’d share the video but I can’t find it). 

It sometimes sucks having to be so strict, but I could not afford to wear stretchy pants over the holidays. It would take forever to drop leggings weight! 🤣 

[WhatAmIWatching]

33 minutes ago, TurtlePower said:

Ok this so funny! It made me remember watching a video of a woman who wore LLR leggings for so long she gained weight and could not fit in her jeans anymore (I’d share the video but I can’t find it). 

It sometimes sucks having to be so strict, but I could not afford to wear stretchy pants over the holidays. It would take forever to drop leggings weight! 🤣 

That video and song is so funny and cute! It's a bop, too! I'm adding it to my holiday playlist along with Granny O'Grimm's Christmas Greeting, and That Christmas Song by DW (nsfw)

Wearing scrubs is dangerous, too! I used to medical assist, and I had to be careful, because scrubs are like medical stretchy pants and are very forgiving, but my jeans weren't at all. 😆 

[WhatAmIWatching]

11 hours ago, Yeah No said:

What I suspect I have are recurring attacks of GERD that can last a month or so at a time and happen maybe twice a year, which give me bad indigestion on just about any food but the most bland, non-acidic foods.  And while I'm in that state I can't eat much in the way of dairy or even tea.  I don't drink coffee.  Even when not in that state I've cut my caffeinated tea down to one cup a day in the morning.  And no carbonated drinks except a flavored seltzer every now and then.  I can experience gut issues other times but not as bad.

I also suspect I will have such an attack if the perfect storm of circumstances is present at the time.  It's very hard to prevent them because there are so many factors, not all of which are under my control.  It could happen because my liver is producing sludge bile that is not making it out of the bile duct too well.  It could be because of stuff I've eaten cumulatively, although as I say I'm pretty careful about that.  It could also happen when I'm under stress, a combination of things.  I don't experience heartburn, don't even know what it feels like, but I'm told you can have "silent reflux" without symptoms.  I want to know what I have and am trying to work with my gastro. to find out.  

I have had seriously terrible heartburn and gerd since they took my gallbladder! I'm not at all careful with what I eat sometimes, lol, but have tried every med to help, and found that  otc cimetidine is the one that can arrest the worst bouts very quickly.

I also found that even when I am careful with what I put in my face, some of my medications can cause a bad bout. It's hit or miss, because I can go weeks or months without any flare (for lack of a better word). Bodies are dumb!

[Absolom]

I did end up on omeprazole a couple years after the gallbladder removal.  That started due to an ulcer, but then I'd get some reflux when we stopped it.  

[iwantcookies]

On 11/22/2021 at 7:04 PM, deirdra said:

and more work for you if you end up as a witness for the prosecution if one of the  husbands ends up missing or murdered

I didn’t even think of that! 

[Yeah No]

10 hours ago, WhatAmIWatching said:

I have had seriously terrible heartburn and gerd since they took my gallbladder! I'm not at all careful with what I eat sometimes, lol, but have tried every med to help, and found that  otc cimetidine is the one that can arrest the worst bouts very quickly.

I also found that even when I am careful with what I put in my face, some of my medications can cause a bad bout. It's hit or miss, because I can go weeks or months without any flare (for lack of a better word). Bodies are dumb!

I'm stuck with Prilosec/Omeprazole and Tums because I can't take any antihistamines - I get violently sick to my stomach on them.  I think the reason I'm having a minor bout with it right now is actually my gastroenterologist's fault.  He recommended that I switch to the "Align" brand probiotic.  I had been taking "RenewLife" women's formula and liked it.  But since he recommended Align and there was all this hype about it online I gave it a shot.  After a week my gut was a MESS.  It actually took me a few days to realize my distress was from that because I never imagined that a probiotic could give me such symptoms.  Then I read that a significant portion of people report similar symptoms on Align.  So I went off of it but I'm still feeling GERD symptoms, which for me does not include heartburn but just a burning acidic feeling in the gut.  I'm hoping my gut settles down soon.

I am convinced that there are very subtle reasons for a lot of bad bouts.  They could be brought on by a combination of stress and a few too many foods that somehow don't "like" each other in the gut.  And just try figuring that out.  People say to isolate it based on which foods might cause the symptoms.  Well at times anything can cause those symptoms.  Most of the time nothing bothers me, especially in moderation.  It's only when I transgress some unwritten law and unknowingly upset the delicate balance that my gut revolts.   It's very difficult to draw a direct cause and effect relationship because of that.

[Absolom]

That's why they say keep a food diary.  Sometimes it's something you ate four days ago or as you said some weird food combination that sets it off.  I can't have onion, bell pepper, and eggs together - ever.  I've been that way my whole life.  It took me until I was around 17 to figure it out though.  

[lookeyloo]

Agree with the food diary including the ingredients on all packaged food.  Mr lookeyloo had unrelenting migraines and finally a doctor who said she believed they were food related.  Not everyone's migraines are triggered by the same things.  First she had him start with an elimination diet.  Very hard for us, eating just a few things.  She told him he would feel much worse until he started feeling better.  He did but when he started feeling better, he felt like it was a miracle.  And then we had the difficult but not impossible and worth it project of figuring out what triggered his migraines.  I read a lot of labels all the way to the end.  We kept a great big fat notebook.  But, he is basically migraine free for years.  I'm sure the same thing is possible with food sensitivities.  the grandson is doing a similar thing now after a lot of stomach pain, an endoscope and a colonoscopy (he is 21) and they told him to keep track of what he eats.  What are the chances.  

[deirdra]

I haven't had heartburn and gerd since I gave up white carbs & strongly support elimination diets to find out which foods cause your problems.

Edited November 24, 2021 by deirdra

[iwantcookies]

Happy thanksgiving 🦃 to everyone! I am going to the movies for the first time since 3/2020. Hope it isn’t too packed!

 

[Rabbit Hutch]

My favorite holiday of the year is here, and I've much to be grateful for.  Here's my trucker list of things responsible for my attitude of gratitude today:

1.) Silky long underwear

2.) Lysol can be found once again

2.) Dumpsters (truckers LOVE a good dumpster)

3.) Toilets with seat warmers (yes, some truckstops and terminals have these)  😁

4.) Toilet paper

4. CBs with off switches (too bad dispatchers don't) 🙄 

6. Truckstops that offer Caribou (my favorite) and Starbucks coffees 

7.  Truckers who don't take away my trucker card cause I walk around the truckstop with a PSL latte in hand 🥰

8. Truck parking at Walmart. (GROCERY DAY, Hurray!!! 🤗 

9. The vibration and rumble coming from all of those horses under my feet. Vrrrooommm!  🚛

10.  That I'm a trucker's wife.  Living the dream, folks!  💖

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

 

[TurtlePower]

Happy Thanksgiving everyone (to those who observe anyways)! 

Hubby likes Thanksgiving but we aren’t doing much (I can take it or leave it). I’m about to set off on my tradition of doing a 10k on Turkey Day, maybe farther if I’m not in too much pain. Might be a nice day for a good beach walk later. 

Happy day all! 

[Sandy W]

2 hours ago, Rabbit Hutch said:

My favorite holiday of the year is here, and I've much to be grateful for.  Here's my trucker list of things responsible for my attitude of gratitude today:

1.) Silky long underwear

2.) Lysol can be found once again

2.) Dumpsters (truckers LOVE a good dumpster)

3.) Toilets with seat warmers (yes, some truckstops and terminals have these)  😁

4.) Toilet paper

4. CBs with off switches (too bad dispatchers don't) 🙄 

6. Truckstops that offer Caribou (my favorite) and Starbucks coffees 

7.  Truckers who don't take away my trucker card cause I walk around the truckstop with a PSL latte in hand 🥰

8. Truck parking at Walmart. (GROCERY DAY, Hurray!!! 🤗 

9. The vibration and rumble coming from all of those horses under my feet. Vrrrooommm!  🚛

10.  That I'm a trucker's wife.  Living the dream, folks!  💖

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

 

 A HUGE debt of gratitude to all the truckers out there who keep it moving through sometimes frightening road conditions.  Without you, the economy would grind to a standstill. 👏

[Rabbit Hutch]

41 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

 A HUGE debt of gratitude to all the truckers out there who keep it moving through sometimes frightening road conditions.  Without you, the economy would grind to a standstill. 👏

*blushes* Oh, thank you, Sandy W.  You're very kind. 😊  We're glad to have been able to be of service during these last couple of trying, tiresome years for the entire country.

No trucker is an island, as there are many, many folks who share the workload of getting products from point A to point B, from the mechanics to the housekeepers who keep the showers up and running, from the front desk people to the servers and cooks in the restaurants, from the forklift drivers to even the dratted DOT, without them we'd not get very far!  

For me, there are so many unsung heroes who worked through it all, and I'm grateful for them all.

So, I salute you with my turkey leg, Sandy!  Here's hoping we get to snark through many more turkey days.  😉

[WhatAmIWatching]

Happy Turkey Day!

RabbitHutch! Thank you to you and your husband for traveling the country and keeping us supplied! I sometimes miss riding around with my trucker husband, but mostly am glad he's doing local work now instead. It keeps my worry out of overdrive. Nothing's cozier than a sleeper cab, I miss that. (I still talk smack on my cb though, lol.)

Yay for movies and 10k's! Those are great ways to spend the day!

 

  We have a fire going on this cool, overcast and waiting for rain day. All the movie channels are doing free previews, and I'm getting texts and calls from my far-flung family. I have a lot to be thankful for, and I truly am recognizing it today. I'm also thankful for all of you! I hope you're all having a peaceful, delicious, and relaxing day. 

[xwordfanatik]

Happy Thanksgiving to all my fellow posters/snarkers!  

 

[ginger90]

[Gramto6]

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone here. Have a peaceful and delicious day!

[Pickleinthemiddle]

2 hours ago, Gramto6 said:

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone here. Have a peaceful and delicious day!

Happy Thanksgiving to you to Gram to 6, and the rest of my fellow Prime Timers.  Enjoy the holiday and food.

I am just ready to eat my large slice of mince meat pie.  

[WhatAmIWatching]

Here are two turkey's roasting themselves! 😆 These are my boys Buddy, and the orange one is our new-ish adopt Tom. (Our third cat, Sissy, is keeping an eye on them -and the leftovers I'm putting away- from atop the fridge.)

[Yeah No]

Awww, thanks for that, @WhatAmIWatching!  Too cute!  Belated Thanksgiving wishes to the nicest and BEST group of people on Prime Timer!

This is my own little turkey, a little lost hen my town affectionately called "Henrietta".  For several months she was seen living at a main intersection in the bushes near the post office.  When she crossed the road she stopped traffic.  I found out that seeing lost wild turkeys is not that uncommon in New England.  Somehow they get separated from their family and wander around aimlessly.  My heart broke for her, she looked so forlorn.  Sometime in September she disappeared.  I can only hope she found herself another turkey family or someone relocated her to a less dangerous area.  🦃

 

[TurtlePower]

7 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Awww, thanks for that, @WhatAmIWatching!  Too cute!  Belated Thanksgiving wishes to the nicest and BEST group of people on Prime Timer!

This is my own little turkey, a little lost hen my town affectionately called "Henrietta".  For several months she was seen living at a main intersection in the bushes near the post office.  When she crossed the road she stopped traffic.  I found out that seeing lost wild turkeys is not that uncommon in New England.  Somehow they get separated from their family and wander around aimlessly.  My heart broke for her, she looked so forlorn.  Sometime in September she disappeared.  I can only hope she found herself another turkey family or someone relocated her to a less dangerous area.  🦃

 

We have wild turkeys where we live. I don’t eat turkeys, so they are in no danger from me (I’d post a photo of all 17 of them but file is too large). We also have deer roaming through the yard quite often.