Small Talk: The Polygamous Cul-de-Sac

[Teafortwo]

52 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Why are your personal goals any of their business?

I should have said "individual" performance goal rather than personal.

[Cetacean]

1 hour ago, Teafortwo said:

I had a brutal week at work this week and just need to vent.

It does sound like the week from hell.

I am an old fogey and I lay some of the blame on the education system that went to "teamwork" instead of individual learning.  A friend of mine went back to college in her 30's and just about lost her mind.  Everything was done by teams but, as the oldest one and one who really cared about her grade, she ended up doing 99% of the work.  Kids don't sit at individual desks (well, at least before covid) but in squares so they all "share" the assignments. I can't help but think that millenials don't even know how to work independently anymore.

1 hour ago, Teafortwo said:

Then they started making us write up our goals (personal and team) for the quarter and the year and I *really* felt that I was in the "Office Space" universe.

Two years before my scheduled retirement I got a new boss half my age who decided she wanted to "mentor" me.  My eyes rolled back so far I could read the tag on my shirt.

I wish I had advice to offer but, sadly, I do not.  Only know that your virtual pals here are sympathetic as all get out!

[Teafortwo]

2 hours ago, Cetacean said:

It does sound like the week from hell.

I am an old fogey and I lay some of the blame on the education system that went to "teamwork" instead of individual learning.  A friend of mine went back to college in her 30's and just about lost her mind.  Everything was done by teams but, as the oldest one and one who really cared about her grade, she ended up doing 99% of the work.  Kids don't sit at individual desks (well, at least before covid) but in squares so they all "share" the assignments. I can't help but think that millenials don't even know how to work independently anymore.

Two years before my scheduled retirement I got a new boss half my age who decided she wanted to "mentor" me.  My eyes rolled back so far I could read the tag on my shirt.

I wish I had advice to offer but, sadly, I do not.  Only know that your virtual pals here are sympathetic as all get out!

Cetacean, thank you so much for taking the time to read my post, and for your very insightful and helpful response. It's really illuminating to look at it from the perspective of collaborative learning supplanting individual learning. I went to grad school for English lit and taught for many years so I was used to doing everything on my own, except for some teacher training and one really great experience co-authoring a presentation with a fellow student who became one of my very best friends. Eventually I burned out on teaching (mostly due to reading endless student essays on weekends, and working in summers to supplant the meager income) and got a corporate job. It was so bad that after a few years I decided I'd be better off learning a trade, which I did for 10 years, before returning to the corp world in 2015. Corp health benefits are better, the work is less physical, and the schedule more fixed.

I really appreciate your your message!

ETA: the idea that your much younger boss took it upon herself to "mentor" you is just, well, astounding. What happened to learning from more seasoned professionals? 

Edited February 26, 2022 by Teafortwo

[TurtlePower]

13 hours ago, Cetacean said:

It does sound like the week from hell.

I am an old fogey and I lay some of the blame on the education system that went to "teamwork" instead of individual learning.  A friend of mine went back to college in her 30's and just about lost her mind.  Everything was done by teams but, as the oldest one and one who really cared about her grade, she ended up doing 99% of the work.  Kids don't sit at individual desks (well, at least before covid) but in squares so they all "share" the assignments. I can't help but think that millenials don't even know how to work independently anymore.

Two years before my scheduled retirement I got a new boss half my age who decided she wanted to "mentor" me.  My eyes rolled back so far I could read the tag on my shirt.

I wish I had advice to offer but, sadly, I do not.  Only know that your virtual pals here are sympathetic as all get out!

Oh I hated this about continuing education trainings for the federal government. As someone with autism, the more people I have to figure out how to communicate with the worse my performance is. They think they’re making it “inclusive” when they’re actually ruining it for people like me. I do much better with independent research projects and maybe 2 people to work with. 

Edited February 26, 2022 by TurtlePower

[Yeah No]

15 hours ago, Teafortwo said:

I had a brutal week at work this week and just need to vent. (With everything going on in the world, it seems kind of petty even to discuss these things but...)

So I'm working with a customer service "team" (how I hate that word for non-sports activities) of very young people, a few millennials but mostly mid-20s (I'm 61). I've had the job for just 5 months (lost former job, where I was valued and survived 3 or 4 rounds of layoffs, due to pandemic). It's been work from home thankfully but now that Omicron has subsided in NYC, they want us to start coming in 2x/week. With commute times it's gonna be an 11 hour day. The company pays for 8 hours but you have to work 9 and supposedly take an hour unpaid lunch break. I'm only in it for the health insurance but am also a hard worker. 

Three times in the past 2 weeks I've been called into zoom meetings with an upset younger colleague and at least one supervisor (once it was 3 supervisors and a co-worker.) I've been handling most of the incoming phone calls and 9/10 times the person who the call is for won't take it, yet somehow I'm the bad guy if I try to handle the customer's request, but also if I do not and ask them to take the call. (This is not typical cust. svc. where everyone has access to all the same info. The customer assignments are based on which account each service rep works with. We're all assigned to different accounts with differing parameters and procedures.) So we use gchat but often the other reps just tell me to tell the customer (who is usually already upset no one has responded to them) that they will call or email the customer. More than a few times the same customers call me again several days later to say that no one has called them back. Even when I take a message and send an email to the customer and introduce/copy the other rep, explain the customer's request etc -- that rep often doesn't respond until the customer emails me or calls me again. (See a pattern here? Customers know that I will help them because others won't.) However the supervisor is all about "the team" so it is not considered a good thing that I try to help the customer because it makes it seem like I'm the only one who will help them. Then I get chastised for trying to take on too much or somehow disrespecting the other co-worker.

The main problem is that these young people are super over-sensitive so even when I express requests in the gentlest way possible they get upset that I am not being a team player, I'm promising the customers things I shouldn't etc. Then suddenly there is a meeting with the supervisor because the other rep is apparently too upset to just speak to me on their own.  When the other rep vents, the supervisor either says nothing or takes their side. Then she privately tells me I'm doing an awesome job with the customers but that I need to be more sensitive to "the team" and their needs.

Also the same rep who today accused me of "disrespecting" her, told me yesterday in response to my request for her help "it's your job to handle it since you took the call." So then I handled it as best I knew how and it turned out I did totally the wrong thing and that's what prompted the meeting today with the supervisor because my mistaken action made it more complicated and time consuming for the other rep. I would never ever tell someone "it's your job not mine" unless I was in a supervisory role - and even then I'd be careful to phrase it in a respectful way. I'd never utter the phrase "it's not my job" either.

I guess my telling them I don't feel safe working onsite with people who don't even have to be vaccinated is going to be "the last straw" as Milton from the brillian "Office Space" movie always mumbles under his breath. Things have gotten so ridiculous that I rewatched it 2 weeks ago. Then they started making us write up our goals (personal and team) for the quarter and the year and I *really* felt that I was in the "Office Space" universe.

Maybe I need to become a "boss babe" like Meri. Oh wait, I don't have 100K followers on Instagram and a TV audience of 10+ years. Sigh...

 

Tea, I feel for you having worked in the corporate world for as long as I did.  I agree with @Cetacean about the teams thing as it is currently conceptualized by the younger generation.  In my opinion it loses the point of customer service because your primary responsibility is to the team, not the customer.  In my opinion this is only one reason why customer service has gone downhill across the board in recent years.  The other is what I started noticing in my last few years of employment - that there has been a shift in philosophy on what workers' responsibility is toward "customer service" and the very definition of teamwork itself.  It was beaten into anyone over a certain age that if there was someone in need of help and not getting it from somewhere else you should pitch in and be a "team player" by filling in the gap and doing whatever you could to solve the problem even if it was technically not your job to do so as long as you had the ability to do so, and if not, connect them with the person or department that could. Today the focus is so much on "roles and responsibilities" that somehow the goal of helping people resolve issues is completely lost in the process.  Now your responsibility is to respect the roles and responsibilities of the team FIRST even if that means not helping someone you have the ability to help that the rest of the team somehow has missed. Also, attempting to refer someone assigned to you that you don't really know how to help to someone who can is also not seen as appropriate.  It is more important that you only fulfill the role you've been assigned whether you have the solution or not and forget about referring them to someone who can.  It is also seen as a personal affront if you take on what is seen as someone else's responsibility even if they're not taking that responsibility.  Instead of thanking you, you're seen as committing an act of "disrespect".   In my opinion that's probably because they know they're not helping the person but they are so full of themselves that it offends them if anyone else helps them either.  Because the goal is really not to help anyone anymore.  That's why all those people are not being helped.  It's more important that they be seen as only doing what is considered to be "their job" rather than help anyone.

And then you, with your "older person" values comes in and sees all these holes in the dyke and out of your "ancient" work ethic you feel obligated to put your fingers in them (I know I would feel and do the same).   I really think the goal now is to see how long they can get away without resolving customer issues without having to do anything.  Maybe that irritating person will go away after a while if they are thwarted enough.  Or maybe they just don't even give it that much thought.  Because again, the goal is not about resolving anyone's problems.  And what is unbelievable to me is that even the supervisors don't seem to care that all these people's issues are not being resolved.  They don't care if customers are in an endless loop of getting nowhere.  Because solving their problems is not the goal anymore.  Customers are just these irritating people one has to BS and hopefully placate and send on their way. 

Also, employees from our generation tended to have more knowledge about the entire process and knew where to refer people and how to handle things not technically in our job descriptions.  Now forget about that.  The younger generations don't know those things, aren't taught them and aren't even expected to learn. In fact, I think it's being kept a big secret from them so they don't learn and perhaps threaten someone with their knowledge.  When we were young and did that we got commended for it.  Now you get scolded.  How dare you be so resourceful and HELPFUL to anyone?  Everyone now is even more like a little cog in a wheel with no knowledge of the bigger picture.  In my opinion it is just another example of how dumbed down everyone is becoming thanks to situations like this.

Jeez, is it painfully obvious how I feel about all of this?  It's no wonder I gave up looking for a job (not that I was getting anywhere with that because of my age) and am willing to live very frugally so that I don't have to work.  It's not easy even being married because my husband doesn't make all that much in semi-retirement and we were used to living on two full incomes, but despite that I see being my own boss selling my stuff on eBay even if it is chump change as a better alternative.  You know it has to be bad for me to look at it that way.  I just have to tough it out until I can formally retire and collect my retirement income and Social Security.  My husband was going to try to hold out until 70 but did the math and realized he's better off collecting his full benefit in a few months when he will be 66 and 4 months.  That should help ease things up for us a bit.  

So anyway, I feel for you, I do.  I know how I would feel in your shoes.  I guess you just have to tough it out and keep your eyes on the prize for the next however many years you have to go before you can retire.   I wish I could offer you more advice and hope what I've said is helpful to you in some way.

I will say this, though.  If you're in it for benefits there are other ways to approach your employment that might be better suited for you if you can manage it, and of course I really have no idea if that is a realistic possibility in NY or in your line of work, but sometimes working on a consulting basis works out better for older people because they can more easily move around and find better jobs, and are treated on a different basis than employees, plus if they don't get health insurance through the companies they consult for they can get it through their state's health insurance programs like my husband and I did when he worked on that basis.  It wasn't as expensive as we thought it was going to be.  Plus even without matching 401K plans there are IRAs and other investments that might make up for that.  Maybe being your own "boss babe" in some way might be the best thing after all, LOL.  Anyway, if you've already explored that and it doesn't work for you, forget I said it, LOL. 

Many (((hugs)))  🤗

 

[Teafortwo]

2 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Today the focus is so much on "roles and responsibilities" that somehow the goal of helping people resolve issues is completely lost in the process.  Now your responsibility is to respect the roles and responsibilities of the team FIRST even if that means not helping someone you have the ability to help that the rest of the team somehow has missed. Also, attempting to refer someone assigned to you that you don't really know how to help to someone who can is also not seen as appropriate.  It is more important that you only fulfill the role you've been assigned whether you have the solution or not and forget about referring them to someone who can. 

Thank you @Yeah NoYou really hit the nail on the head. That's absolutely it. 

[Teafortwo]

3 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Also, employees from our generation tended to have more knowledge about the entire process and knew where to refer people and how to handle things not technically in our job descriptions.  Now forget about that.  The younger generations don't know those things, aren't taught them and aren't even expected to learn. In fact, I think it's being kept a big secret from them so they don't learn and perhaps threaten someone with their knowledge.  When we were young and did that we got commended for it.  Now you get scolded.  How dare you be so resourceful and HELPFUL to anyone? 

My supervisor finds it remarkable (not in a good way) that "you seem to feel you need to have all the details" of events taking place that people call in about, where I'm not in the loop because a different part of the customer svc team is working on that event. Yet there are over 200 attendees,  the event is in 2 weeks and the location not yet announced (only the very large city). So I'm unaware of this until people call in and ask where it is, and then the assigned rep just says "I don't know lol" when I text her. Doesn't bother to say that the location is a secret for security reasons, a much better thing to tell the customer than I don't know. But also the rep tells me not to bother to put the customer through to her because she's only going to tell them she doesn't have the info either. (Supervisor ended up calling people back after finally explaining to me about the security issue, because  I told her I felt very awkward just saying I don't know to the callers). I used to work in hospitality and the best practice was to say "Let me find out for you" if we didn't have an answer.

Thanks for your suggestion about consulting. I used to do contract work but that was before Obamacare and I had affordable health ins through a freelancer group. All of that went away and the only decent ins through Obamacare is actually too expensive (though less than getting insurance as an individual from good providers like Aetna or Cigna. I don't really have the background to be a consultant nor the stomach for constantly having to drum up new business.

Edited February 26, 2022 by Teafortwo

[xwordfanatik]

Here's to being retired!  Rilly, it was the right decision for both Mr. X and me to take early retirement.  We were 55 and 60.  Our blue-collar jobs just broke us physically, and it was hell trying to work as fast as we did when we were younger and gung-ho.  The icing on the cake, so to speak, was that many of the young people we worked with were lazy and entitled.  Teamwork, indeed.  

The first few years retired were very tight financially.  We both took Social Security at ages 62, but until then, it was our pensions that are nice, but they of course would have been worth more if we had waited until ages 67, and Social Security payments would be bigger, too.  

Unlike Kootie & Co., we've pretty much always lived under our means.  We didn't grow up poor, but of course our Depression-era parents did, and we learned to not overspend and owe thousands on credit cards.  

It's not an easy situation to work with a bunch of slackers.  Having to stay civil to coworkers (ha!  As if.) and the mostly awful management was challenging, that's for sure!

Good luck, Tea.  It does help to, as Yeah said, to keep your eyes on the prize, which is why Mr. and I put up with a crummy workplace for a lot of years.  

[Absolom]

54 minutes ago, Teafortwo said:

My supervisor finds it remarkable (not in a good way) that "you seem to feel you need to have all the details" of events taking place that people call in about, where I'm not in the loop because a different part of the customer svc team is working on that event.

I sympathize with your wish to do a good job.  I was fortunate when I was working to find people who appreciated someone who stockpiled all the odd and arcane details about things or simply the obvious ones in the case you're talking about.  When I worked for a more head in the sand type as you describe, I learned about a technique called malicious compliance.  That's where you do exactly what's asked of you and nothing more and let the chips fall where they may.  (That's usually following an erroneous or overly complex procedure that eventually leads to problems.) So it isn't your responsibility if you don't know where the event is going to be and you simply shunt the calls or emails to who is supposed to answer the question and then forget about it.  Let the customers get mad at that person.  I don't know what your job is, but you could pretend at least in your mind to be the operator when calls come in that aren't in your purview.  I know it's hard not to provide full customer service, but it may be easier on you in the end.  

You may need to rewrite the script in your head and pretend you are the operator for the organization.  Instead of I don't know where the event is being held, let me see if I can find out for you go Alice Smith is in charge of the March carnival let me connect you.

When they call back because they haven't heard from Alice, go I'm so sorry she hasn't contacted you.  Let me leave her a reminder message for you.  

Remember if that's their policy, then it isn't on your head when things go wrong if you follow it.

Edited February 26, 2022 by Absolom

[Claire Voyant]

1 hour ago, Teafortwo said:

My supervisor finds it remarkable (not in a good way) that "you seem to feel you need to have all the details" of events taking place that people call in about, where I'm not in the loop because a different part of the customer svc team is working on that event. Yet there are over 200 attendees,  the event is in 2 weeks and the location not yet announced (only the very large city). So I'm unaware of this until people call in and ask where it is, and then the assigned rep just says "I don't know lol" when I text her. Doesn't bother to say that the location is a secret for security reasons, a much better thing to tell the customer than I don't know. But also the rep tells me not to bother to put the customer through to her because she's only going to tell them she doesn't have the info either. (Supervisor ended up calling people back after finally explaining to me about the security issue, because  I told her I felt very awkward just saying I don't know to the callers). I used to work in hospitality and the best practice was to say "Let me find out for you" if we didn't have an answer.

Thanks for your suggestion about consulting. I used to do contract work but that was before Obamacare and I had affordable health ins through a freelancer group. All of that went away and the only decent ins through Obamacare is actually too expensive (though less than getting insurance as an individual from good providers like Aetna or Cigna. I don't really have the background to be a consultant nor the stomach for constantly having to drum up new business.

If I were you and another customer service rep told me not to transfer THEIR customer to THEM, I would keep transferring the calls to them, like it or not.   Particularly since it's been made abundantly clear that helping certain customers is NOT a part of your job. 

I'd follow up any conversation with a text and advise said customer service rep to take it to the supervisor if they don't want to help with their customers.  Use lots of syrup and play dumb like the rest of them.  I'd make sure that any message I sent was copied to said supervisor/s.  IOW, always cover your azz.  Keep copies of e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. and start taking notes in a special little notebook you can keep in your purse with you at all times.   Your scoldings are being written out, and kept on file, so turnabout is fair play.    

I know how frustrating this is, having been in customer service for my entire career life.  Remember, too, that HR can be your friend.   Not always, I know, but they are usually more than a little aware of the laws and don't like trouble from any department.   You have rights you may not even be aware of.   😉

It's good to be retired, so you just hang tough.  You'll get there.  If they want to fire you, fine.  Unemployment is for just that type of situation, but whatever you do, don't quit in a snit!   No sense screwing up your benefits, if you kwim?  

I pray that God will show you favor.    🙏

Edited February 26, 2022 by Claire Voyant

[Teafortwo]

1 hour ago, Absolom said:

You may need to rewrite the script in your head and pretend you are the operator for the organization.  Instead of I don't know where the event is being held, let me see if I can find out for you go Alice Smith is in charge of the March carnival let me connect you

This is a great idea! I'm gonna try it. Thank you!

[Teafortwo]

1 hour ago, Claire Voyant said:

2 hours ago, Teafortwo said:

Expand  

If I were you and another customer service rep told me not to transfer THEIR customer to THEM, I would keep transferring the calls to them, like it or not.   Particularly since it's been made abundantly clear that

Excellent advice and glad to hear from a former customer service worker! I just wish we had some clarity on what kinds of calls we are supposed to handle and what calls we are not. Much of the problem is that there is no handbook for any of this, no guidelines,  and the system of everyone answering the main phone line just started a couple months ago. Before that customers who didn't have our individual direct line numbers were just SOL as they'd get a recording that the voicemail box was full. LOL

[Absolom]

1 hour ago, Teafortwo said:

nd the system of everyone answering the main phone line just started a couple months ago.

The very kind of system malicious compliance is designed to handle.  Touch not a call that isn't yours.  Also don't jump to be the first to answer calls.  Finish typing that sentence, stay on the phone 30 seconds after a call ends, etc.  Give the others a reasonable shot at picking up the calls.  Watch the slackers and pick up some of their habits.

[TurtlePower]

14 hours ago, Teafortwo said:

Excellent advice and glad to hear from a former customer service worker! I just wish we had some clarity on what kinds of calls we are supposed to handle and what calls we are not. Much of the problem is that there is no handbook for any of this, no guidelines,  and the system of everyone answering the main phone line just started a couple months ago. Before that customers who didn't have our individual direct line numbers were just SOL as they'd get a recording that the voicemail box was full. LOL

So, many many years ago I tried customer service at a call center. I got in trouble for being truthful when talking to the customers! The company wanted us to lie, like when a product was discontinued or on a very long back order. I refused to do that to the customers. Needless to say, I didn’t last long. 

It’s very disheartening to know so many people are willing (and more than happy) to deceive their fellow humans. I don’t know how many customers had headaches from not receiving what they ordered, but none of them were because of me.

Humans can be real assholes. 

[Yeah No]

On 2/26/2022 at 3:31 PM, Teafortwo said:

Thanks for your suggestion about consulting. I used to do contract work but that was before Obamacare and I had affordable health ins through a freelancer group. All of that went away and the only decent ins through Obamacare is actually too expensive (though less than getting insurance as an individual from good providers like Aetna or Cigna. I don't really have the background to be a consultant nor the stomach for constantly having to drum up new business.

Your welcome!  Sorry to hear that the health insurance was too expensive.  I've heard it can be but for some reason it was affordable for us even on a Silver plan.  When we both became unemployed due to the pandemic in 2020 (I was actually employed by my husband's home based limo. business at the time doing office work) we ended up on no premium Medicaid, which definitely did not suck, which I was on all through 2020 and 2021.  I was extended on Medicaid for this year too and that's great.  He's now on Medicare because he's 65 (he'll be 66 in a few days).  So if you get fired and collect unemployment benefits you may be eligible for Medicaid, which would solve your medical insurance problem for a while.

22 hours ago, Teafortwo said:

Excellent advice and glad to hear from a former customer service worker! I just wish we had some clarity on what kinds of calls we are supposed to handle and what calls we are not. Much of the problem is that there is no handbook for any of this, no guidelines,  and the system of everyone answering the main phone line just started a couple months ago. Before that customers who didn't have our individual direct line numbers were just SOL as they'd get a recording that the voicemail box was full. LOL

You have indeed been given some excellent advice here.  While not technically a customer service rep. my first job was as a front desk person in undergrad. admissions at my alma mater.  I was not only responsible for meeting and greeting prospective students and their parents, but I also answered the telephone, which was technically a customer service role.  This was before voicemail so I was basically an operator and answered not only the main information line of the entire university, but everyone's phones in the office too!  I took messages and route calls to the appropriate person involving questions about applicants' admissions status and any issues surrounding that.  I also had to be diplomatic and resolve all issues without bothering too many people in the back office.  And believe me, there were irate parents to deal with too!  I was expected to be the "face" of the university and never say "no" to anyone but find a way to help them.  It was an incredibly fast paced, busy and demanding job basically because I was doing the job of 3 people and getting paid crap to do it.  I answered all questions about programs, majors, admissions requirements, application requirements, etc.  I also scheduled all admissions interviews with 5 counselors, did admin. work for all of them, kept the tour guide schedule.  I was very dedicated to the job because I cared about education and the school's mission.  I felt it gave a lot to me and wanted to give back in some way.  I was young, happy and idealistic.  Unfortunately it was just too much for one person and I burned to a crisp after a few years.

Anyway, what ended up happening is that the director that hired me had pumped me up into thinking that there might be a promotion involved to assistant director.  He was nothing but complimentary of my work and everything was going well until he decided to leave the university about a year or so later.  His replacement was the biggest narcissist I ever met in my life.  He HATED everyone and plotted to get rid of us.  The only problem was that most of us were members of an office workers union so he couldn't just terminate us for no reason.  He tried making up lies about us which were so transparently false the director of "Personnel" as it was called back then protected us and he had to back down.  This guy didn't realize that the director knew us and knew he was lying about us.  The only reason I didn't leave at that time is that I had already enrolled in a graduate program for Counseling Psych. and I needed the free tuition.  I thought about switching departments but nothing came open that I would have wanted to do.  So I "kept my eyes on the prize" for another few years until I graduated and moved to CT.  Fortunately the toxic boss backed down and ignored most of us after that and I didn't really have to deal with him much on a daily basis so that helped.

Would you believe this bastard once admitted to me that he didn't want to promote me because I did my job too well and he knew he'd have to split my job into two or three after I left?  The job had definitely become way more demanding by the time I got there.  The woman that was in the position before me retired but I heard she left because she was burned out.  Well, anyway I eventually needed to get out of that job one way or another so I found out from the head of Personnel that as a union employee I could apply for another union job in the back office and if I was qualified (which I was) this evil boss would have to let me have the position.  I just had to get out of the hot seat at that front desk.  I ended up managing the mailing list and mail merge documents plus helped with computer entry and word processing duties, plus managed the staff of student workers.  I got paid more and it actually felt like a vacation.  My old job was actually split in 3.  I still ended up being the "go to" person to transfer calls to when all else failed and nobody knew the answer.  They knew I was pretty much the only person who did know most of that stuff.  And the bastard still wouldn't promote me to assistant director!

Anyway, I finally got out of there after I graduated from grad. school and moved.  It was actually a good thing I didn't attempt any bigger career ambitions while I was still in the grad. program because back then they didn't care if you worked full time, you were expected to take a full time course load and if you didn't like it they acted like you should scale back your working hours.  Meanwhile most of us in the program were independent adults so that was stupid.  I'm sure it's not like that now.

Would you believe this evil boss announced he was leaving after I had already announced that I was moving to CT?  Why couldn't he have left before?  He ended up going to NYU but didn't last there (no surprise) and ended up doing admissions consulting after that.  He was just a toxic phony and the only reason he got the job in my office and was tolerated is because he was an alum and had connections.

Sorry, I've gone on too long but the skills I learned dealing with the public in that job served me well throughout my career and have made me very conscious of what is and isn't good customer service and how much it has changed since I was young (and IMO not for the better!).  

[SunnyBeBe]

Interacting with the public and people at work can be complicated.  Working for myself or others….it’s challenging.  I get working for health insurance.  
 

I had a dream last night that someone gave me an animal that no one knew existed! It was a cute cuddly little thing about the size of a small raccoon.  I loved it, but was concerned due to the fact that it was an aberration and was unknown to earth as a species!  It had such an impact on me!  😲

[SunnyBeBe]

Update on knee injury.  The orthopedist  says it’s a meniscus tear and surgery is likely:(   I’m scheduled for an MRI next week to see the extent of damage. I’m staying positive.   

[Teafortwo]

So here's a crazy update on my work story from last week. I had a meeting with my manager late this afternoon and got a performance review (they said they weren't going to review those of us who'd been there less than a year, but she said she did it as a courtesy). It was all positive as far as my handling customer issues/phones - except that several co-workers complained they felt I don't trust them. I also learned I'm getting a bonus of 3/4 of one week's pay, this week - even though we'd also been told that workers with less than a year at the co are ineligible for bonuses until the end of this year. 

Finally and really most important, it seems that with doctor's note some of us who are not comfortable returning to the office may be exempt after all! I already have 2 doctors' notes due to asthma, which has unfortunately gotten worse in the past 2 months. Internist and ENT both stepped up. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. It's even scarier now to think of working next to unmasked people because the company reversed course last week and we're no longer required to have gotten a booster. I think they did so because so many employees only got their first shots fairly recently, so they won't qualify for the booster for several months.

What a world.  Thanks again to everyone for your very helpful responses when I was so upset last week. This is such a great forum. 

PS today I was not on the phones for a couple of hours early this afternoon due to a glitch in the system. The manager noticed we went from 100% of calls answered to just 58%. 

Edited March 3, 2022 by Teafortwo

[SunnyBeBe]

Teafortwo, the bonus sounds sweet. That’s a plus.  I don’t get the co-worker trust thing.  I get not wanting to sit near unmasked co-workers.  If I encounter one, I steer clear.  

[Absolom]

1 hour ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Update on knee injury.  The orthopedist  says it’s a meniscus tear and surgery is likely:(   I’m scheduled for an MRI next week to see the extent of damage. I’m staying positive.   

That's what my daughter had.  Advice from her orthopedist is do as much strengthening before surgery as you can manage and do all the PT afterwards until you get back to where you were before.

[SunnyBeBe]

28 minutes ago, Absolom said:

That's what my daughter had.  Advice from her orthopedist is do as much strengthening before surgery as you can manage and do all the PT afterwards until you get back to where you were before.

I’ll have to ask him about that. He said my knee gets angry when I use it a lot due to the tear and that’s why it collapses.  I’ll do anything I can to help it along, though.  I hope I can find some PT online.  

[Absolom]

50 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

’ll have to ask him about that. He said my knee gets angry when I use it a lot due to the tear and that’s why it collapses.  I’ll do anything I can to help it along, though.  I hope I can find some PT online.  

Hers was pre-COVID so PT was easier.  They had her begin with seated stretches and then mild resistance with exercise bands and built up from there.  The stronger the surrounding leg muscles are the better apparently.

Edited March 3, 2022 by Absolom

[Gramto6]

5 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Update on knee injury.  The orthopedist  says it’s a meniscus tear and surgery is likely:(   I’m scheduled for an MRI next week to see the extent of damage. I’m staying positive.   

My right knee is very painful but I am also dealing with having cataract surgery. The vision in my left eye is almost non existent so the eye takes priority. I am hoping I can get by with a steroid shot for the knee. But eye is priority right now...

[Gramto6]

3 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I’ll have to ask him about that. He said my knee gets angry when I use it a lot due to the tear and that’s why it collapses.  I’ll do anything I can to help it along, though.  I hope I can find some PT online.  

That makes me worry because my knee does get "angry" if I walk too much...

[Cetacean]

Before I had my arthritic knee replaced, I was able to put it off for over a year by getting Hyaluronic Acid (also called viscosupplementation) injections. It's kind of like an artificial lubricant.  It's a series of (as I recall) three injections. It was wonderful and allowed me to put off surgery until just before I retired. 

[SunnyBeBe]

I believe that the particular condition determines when and if surgery is required.  He demonstrated my condition on a model of the knee, so I could visualize the problem.   He also focuses on other types of treatment rather than surgery, so I’m comfortable with his direction.  He’s very experienced.  Happens to be the physician/advisor for the US Olympic Sailing Team!  I thought that was interesting.  Plus, the stellar reviews from all around help ease my worries.    I never realized just how many people have knee issues.  I certainly do emphasize. 

Edited March 3, 2022 by SunnyBeBe

[Absolom]

There isn't a lot besides surgery you can do for a medium to badly torn meniscus so don't worry about that aspect for a minute.  

[Teafortwo]

So I was concerned about the removal of a booster requirement for return to my company's office. Spoke to new co-worker, really helpful upbeat young guy. He said he was quitting because of how upset all the callers are, and because of "the mandate." I reassured him it seems like they're more flexible now, especially if you have a doctor's note (like, for asthma). About an hour after we hung up, I realized we were almost definitely on opposite sides of "the mandate." LOL Nice kid though, just doesn't like the amount of unhappy customers he's had to deal with.

I think I figured out why I got the bonus (taxed at over 45% alas): they're afraid I might leave too and then they'd have to fill two jobs instead of just one. I am really trying to stay on my co-workers' good side. I need the insurance. My mood is way better than this time last week, thank goodness. Except for when I read the news.

[CalicoKitty]

I actually have a tendon that is catching on my knee replacement hardware.  My knee gets very, very painful and swollen if I stand for any length of time or walk any distance.  My ortho sent me to PT, and it is helping a lot.   The goal is to strengthen everything on that side of my knee and leg.  My advise, after years of knee surgeries, is to not do anything without your doctor's permission.  If something hurts, stop and don't do it.  You are only making the damage worse.  Don't do anything just because it worked for someone else.  But do follow all of your doctor's orders.  My doctor told me NOT to use my Cubi until the therapist at PT told me it was ok to do so.  Every case is special and different.  I wish you the best of luck. 

[Meowwww]

Jumping on to rant, and not to take away from the current subject. 
 

What happened to Pinterest?  I used to go on there to find recipes and to pin cool stuff like vintage photographs and Victorian London stuff. 
Now it’s all about selling.   When did that happen?  When you search, it asks what you are shopping for vs searching for. 
Me=not good with change. 

[iwantcookies]

Delete

Edited March 7, 2022 by iwantcookies

[TurtlePower]

12 hours ago, Meowwww said:

Jumping on to rant, and not to take away from the current subject. 
 

What happened to Pinterest?  I used to go on there to find recipes and to pin cool stuff like vintage photographs and Victorian London stuff. 
Now it’s all about selling.   When did that happen?  When you search, it asks what you are shopping for vs searching for. 
Me=not good with change. 

Yeah. I stopped using it. Like many other things, it went from good and useful to nothing but a bunch of selling (with not enough usefulness to continue to bother with). 

While we’re on that topic, I’ve become more and more annoyed with commercials in resent months. Most commercials are so stupid, they have the opposite effect on me and I won’t want a product or service based on the stupidity of the ad. I stopped drinking Aha sparkling water because I hated their ads so much. 

[Yeah No]

17 minutes ago, TurtlePower said:

Yeah. I stopped using it. Like many other things, it went from good and useful to nothing but a bunch of selling (with not enough usefulness to continue to bother with). 

While we’re on that topic, I’ve become more and more annoyed with commercials in resent months. Most commercials are so stupid, they have the opposite effect on me and I won’t want a product or service based on the stupidity of the ad. I stopped drinking Aha sparkling water because I hated their ads so much. 

The same thing happened with Angie's List.  I used to be able to find good contractors and special offers there but now it's just a scam site to bomb you with spam mail and phone calls and you never really find any contractors worth doing business with either.  Then I found out that Angie recently sold the site to "Home Advisor", which totally ruined it.  I've even read articles written by contractors complaining about it because they lost a good source of business for them.  I've had to join local forums and Facebook pages where local residents recommend contractors.  I recently found my new snow plow service that way.

And don't get me started on commercials lately.  I've taken to muting the TV completely while they're on anymore.  I record most of my shows anyway.  I keep thinking about what an advertising person once told me years ago.  If you don't get the ad, it wasn't intended for you.  The older I get, the more I see the truth in that statement.

[TurtlePower]

1 hour ago, Yeah No said:

The same thing happened with Angie's List.  I used to be able to find good contractors and special offers there but now it's just a scam site to bomb you with spam mail and phone calls and you never really find any contractors worth doing business with either.  Then I found out that Angie recently sold the site to "Home Advisor", which totally ruined it.  I've even read articles written by contractors complaining about it because they lost a good source of business for them.  I've had to join local forums and Facebook pages where local residents recommend contractors.  I recently found my new snow plow service that way.

And don't get me started on commercials lately.  I've taken to muting the TV completely while they're on anymore.  I record most of my shows anyway.  I keep thinking about what an advertising person once told me years ago.  If you don't get the ad, it wasn't intended for you.  The older I get, the more I see the truth in that statement.

I most often “get” the ads, they just anger me. I’ve always hated gimmicks. Just tell us what you have and we might like it—sometimes, the product/service is lost in the ad because of the overuse of gimmicks and stupidity.

It feels like the human race is becoming more and more stupid as a whole (with a few Elon Musks here and there but overall, pretty stupid). 

[Yeah No]

14 minutes ago, TurtlePower said:

I most often “get” the ads, they just anger me. I’ve always hated gimmicks. Just tell us what you have and we might like it—sometimes, the product/service is lost in the ad because of the overuse of gimmicks and stupidity.

It feels like the human race is becoming more and more stupid as a whole (with a few Elon Musks here and there but overall, pretty stupid). 

Thank you, I feel the same way about the human race these days.

[Sandy W]

1 hour ago, TurtlePower said:

I most often “get” the ads, they just anger me. I’ve always hated gimmicks. Just tell us what you have and we might like it—sometimes, the product/service is lost in the ad because of the overuse of gimmicks and stupidity.

It feels like the human race is becoming more and more stupid as a whole (with a few Elon Musks here and there but overall, pretty stupid). 

I don't know if you would call these ads gimmicks but some have stayed with me over many years.  I'm thinking of the Coke ads of the 1970s - I'd Like to Teach The World To Sing/ I'd Like To Buy The World A Coke.  And even earlier, the 1960s Johnson's Baby Powder ad where the neighbor little boy comes to admire the new arrival as the mother is smoothing Johnson's on the baby and he remarks "too bad you had to get a bald-headed one".

50 - 60 years later, I still think of those ads when I see the product.

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

Everytime I go to Home Goods and admire the throw pillows, I think about the Progressive commercial with Dr. Rick telling the lady "you have no place to sit", makes me think twice about buying any more

 

[Cetacean]

As I get further and further from pop culture, fewer and fewer commercials make sense to me.  I am so out of the loop.

But I have to admit I do get a laugh out of the Dr. Rick Progressive commercials.  Maybe because I am the parent and that's just how I act most of the time.

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

I will totally cop to the pillows on the couch, totally me, but some of the other ones I see my dad doing/saying those things. 

[HighlandWarriorGrl]

3 minutes ago, Mahamid Frauded Me said:

I will totally cop to the pillows on the couch, totally me, but some of the other ones I see my dad doing/saying those things. 

I see myself in some of those as well, and I LOVE all of those commercials!

[iwantcookies]

Hulu/YouTube (on my devices) run ads in Spanish. I don’t speak Spanish. I’m having a laugh since I don’t get why only the commercials are in Spanish!

[Teafortwo]

Latest work update: another coworker quit today (Ms "I don't know lol"). I'm beginning to get some clarity on the situation. That's two of 7 within a week. Pretty soon I won't have anyone to transfer calls to LOL.

ETA it was not one of the people who complained about my "tone"/ lack of trust etc. Apparently more than the 2 with whom I got pulled into meetings with supervisor had complained. But I can't figure out who else it would have been because - of the remaining 3 -one person is super helpful/responsive, one I have had almost no interactions with, and the other gave me a public accolade recently. 

 

Edited March 7, 2022 by Teafortwo

[Yeah No]

15 hours ago, Cetacean said:

But I have to admit I do get a laugh out of the Dr. Rick Progressive commercials.  Maybe because I am the parent and that's just how I act most of the time.

I think the Dr. Rick commercials are genius because people of all ages can see themselves in them.

Yesterday was on the warm side here for an early March day, so I went out wearing a plaid flannel shirt, quilted zip-up vest and khaki field jacket.  I looked in the mirror and said to my husband, "I'm officially turning into my father".

[Yeah No]

14 hours ago, Teafortwo said:

Latest work update: another coworker quit today (Ms "I don't know lol"). I'm beginning to get some clarity on the situation. That's two of 7 within a week. Pretty soon I won't have anyone to transfer calls to LOL.

ETA it was not one of the people who complained about my "tone"/ lack of trust etc. Apparently more than the 2 with whom I got pulled into meetings with supervisor had complained. But I can't figure out who else it would have been because - of the remaining 3 -one person is super helpful/responsive, one I have had almost no interactions with, and the other gave me a public accolade recently. 

 

Hmmmm......It could actually be any one of them.  I've known of coworkers that will be fake-nice to you but stab you in the back behind your back.  The third one could be engaging in "reaction formation".  They complained about you and then felt guilty about it so they tried to "make up for it" with the accolade.  It could even be the one you've had almost no interaction with.  My best friend found out a coworker she barely had anything to do with made a complaint about her that was an outright lie.  Just going on what you've told us so far I'm not getting the impression that this is a very positive work environment so it's no wonder people are quitting.  I've read that quitting is on the rise these days since the pandemic.  

[ginger90]

It all seems so Elementary/Middle School, to me.

[TurtlePower]

1 hour ago, Yeah No said:

I think the Dr. Rick commercials are genius because people of all ages can see themselves in them.

Yesterday was on the warm side here for an early March day, so I went out wearing a plaid flannel shirt, quilted zip-up vest and khaki field jacket.  I looked in the mirror and said to my husband, "I'm officially turning into my father".

Oh I haaaate these. Becoming one’s parents has nothing to do with insurance or bundling and, to me, distracts from what they are actually trying to sell me. The skits would be cute on their own, but I feel a bit annoyed by the company that they think we humans are so stupid we need to see this to want to buy their service.

 I blame my autism for this, to me the attempt at humor to get peoples’ attention in an ad is distracting. There are a few ads with so much filler gimmick I don’t even know what they’re trying to sell because I stopped trying to figure it out after 10 seconds. 

Tell me what you are selling and why I need it. The use of obnoxious characters is unnecessary (annnnd this is when hubby refers to me as Spock 😆).  

[xwordfanatik]

Mr. X hates any and all commercials.  Instead of just muting that crap, he channel surfs, and it drives me nuts.  That's what the mute button is for.

[TurtlePower]

5 minutes ago, xwordfanatik said:

Mr. X hates any and all commercials.  Instead of just muting that crap, he channel surfs, and it drives me nuts.  That's what the mute button is for.

When we had satellite tv we’d pause what we were watching, do something else, then fast-forward through that bullshit. Sometimes we’d let it pause for an hour (or record it) so we would not be exposed to the stupidity of commercials. 

[Rabbit Hutch]

We recently got Discovery Plus and I gladly pay the extra $2/month so I don't have to watch the commercials.  WORTH EVERY PENNY.  😉

[Meowwww]

9 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I think the Dr. Rick commercials are genius because people of all ages can see themselves in them.

Yesterday was on the warm side here for an early March day, so I went out wearing a plaid flannel shirt, quilted zip-up vest and khaki field jacket.  I looked in the mirror and said to my husband, "I'm officially turning into my father".

I am totally one who tells a manager when someone gives me great service, like the commercial. 
 

Not sure if I mentioned, but we moved to Northwest Arkansas in December.   We love it here….but the weather is crazy.  75 one day, snow and ice the next…the ice then lasting through several more 70 degree days.