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S02.E05: Quick And Painless


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Yes! The wig is dead!

Now cut up that little shit you call a son and we've got us a show!

ETA: You just cut off all your hair, but you're about to fight through a monster-war zone wearing a suit and tie?

Edited by CletusMusashi
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I love that they're calling the new whatsamathingies "spider kids."

 

Spider Kid, Spider Kid!

Does whatever a spider did!

Eyes can't look? Look for Zach!

Don't ask why his mom wants him back!

Look out... here comes a Spider Kid!

Edited by CletusMusashi
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RIP(rest in pieces) Stoll's wig.

 

Was anyone hoping that Ef would take that bag he was packing and whirl around and slam it at Zach's head when he started on about not leaving without his mom and being able to fend for himself?  Fend? Did he say fend?  I sure wanted to see that.

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Corey's head is liberated! Free at last! Permanent death to the wig!

 

The episode was alright. I kept saying "throw him off the train, Eph" and he did exactly that. Good for Eph although his old boss only saw him because he had to get a drink.

 

I still don't get why the cops aren't wearing riot head gear. The pandemonium at the train station was the only moment that the city felt real. Everyone else is calmly hanging around while monsters prey on them. I mean, what is the fence doing relaxing doing in that warehouse. Why hasn't he head out of the town? So the Staten Island woman finally realized how hard it is to face that someone you love is infected and having to make that hard decision. 

 

That young woman should know better than responding to Palmer's BS. If she was smart, she would go home, pack her bags immediately, and leave the city before he even knew that she was gone,  I worry that Fitzwilliam is a plant sent by Palmer to spy on Abraham. I hope not though.

 

The preview was boss. Made me realize that the now deceased leader of the Ancients' crew was not who I thought he was.

Edited by SimoneS
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I'm still bothered by the fact that all these rich people are still all going out for fine dining -- at night -- while vampire hordes are loose in the streets.  Did they learn nothing from the banker massacre last week ?  They are still acting like nothing is really wrong, despite the fact that a massive building is on fire in the middle of Manhattan.

 

While the trains are running on time (apparently), I was surprised at how empty the train was.  Especially with all these people at the train station clambering to get out of the city.

 

I'm glad that Fet was freed from jail with minimal effort, in order to go hunting spiderkids.

 

No Gus this episode -- or did I miss it ?  There should have been some follow up to his sub-plot with the Silver Angel.

 

So was the hooded guy at the end that got off the private jet a senior member of the Vompire Team Six hierarchy ?

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I'm still bothered by the fact that all these rich people are still all going out for fine dining -- at night -- while vampire hordes are loose in the streets.  Did they learn nothing from the banker massacre last week ?  They are still acting like nothing is really wrong, despite the fact that a massive building is on fire in the middle of Manhattan.

 

It is one of the most unbelievable aspects of the show. Rich people would be the first to abandon the city using their helicopters and private planes. Even when the city is running smoothly most of the wealthy spend most of their time elsewhere. 

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So, the curfew doesn't apply to wealthy people. Or any people who have to serve the wealthy people at restaurants. Or anybody who just wants to ignore the curfew, really. Good to know gay bars are still open in the vampire apocalypse!

 

So Palmer's assistant was momentarily taken aback when he made a joke about the burning building, but then decides to have a dance with him. I really hope she's got some kind of plan up her sleeve and is playing him for some reason.

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This show became so much more watchable when Eph unglued his wig.  Now if only Kelly can find her little brat, worm him, and then toss a silver grenade on him.  I love that Nora was all "Zach can stay, I'll watch him" turned into her just leaving him to 'fend' for himself.  Hopefully Zach will just walk to Kelly.  

 

Sometimes things really annoy me.  Like when our band of vamp murderers walk around with zero protection and with their long hair just flying all over the place and even go swimming in a vamp next can somehow dodge those little worms while a trained police force with duct tape gets infected.  THEY HAD DUCT TAPE!!!  That should have been enough.  Nothing gets through duct tape.  

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The train bothered me in terms of world building.  That appeared to be a normal Northeast Regional train.  Why was it so empty?

 

Security was restricting travel out of NYC.  If other cities are normal, than someone travelling Philly-DC shouldn't have a problem getting on, and there'd be a lot more people on the train (it's Amtrak's busiest route).  But it's possible that train was reserved only for government officials.  But then why was it so long?  They'd only need 1 car.

 

It's a minor nitpick, but it made all of the train scenes feel like an artificial set-piece rather than part of the plot.

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If I was trying to clear an apartment, and it was daylight, the first thing I would do is open the curtains, since, you know, the Sun is actually a pretty useful weapon here.  What I wouldn't do is peer into a hole in the wall, when the infected have lightning-quick tongues that could shoot out and hit me in the face before I could react.  These people are so stupid, I've started rooting for the Master.

 

Barnes was pretty feisty.  Does he have Master juice in him?  Did I miss something?

Edited by MrHufflepuff
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I haven't watched the episode. Did anything meaningful or important happen that would be worth the effort of watching this episode?

 

I stopped watching the show last episode when it started off with some weird segue. I'm not sure what this show is aiming for exactly since the infection seems to have little effect on the day to day life of the civilians which is just bizarre.

Edited by wayne67
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Barnes was pretty feisty.  Does he have Master juice in him?  Did I miss something?

 

They did not show us anything, but I think Barnes is one of the Master's slightly infected minions like Palmer.

 

The inconsistent vampire infection/hunting and curfew, the incompetent ignorant authorities and citizens, and lack of evacuation and empty trains is clearly being done to ramp up to the drama, but failing miserably. And why is Gus being wasted like this? I was so looking forward to his hooking with the Ancients' crew and doing some serious strigoi killing this season. I wonder who the showrunner is. It can't be Del Toro, he is too busy making moviss.  

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What I wouldn't do is peer into a hole in the wall, when the infected have lightning-quick tongues that could shoot out and hit me in the face before I could react.  These people are so stupid, I've started rooting for the Master.

 

Oh jeez when Fet did that I wanted to slap him upside his meticulously dyed head. Sure, just stick your eye in a hole when you know there are vampires on the other side! *slap*

 

I wonder how Zach has a Bolivar poster in his room? It's Fet's place, right? So either Zach brought it with him, picked it up on one of his forbidden excursions, or Fet is secretly a fan.

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If I was trying to clear an apartment, and it was daylight, the first thing I would do is open the curtains, since, you know, the Sun is actually a pretty useful weapon here.  What I wouldn't do is peer into a hole in the wall, when the infected have lightning-quick tongues that could shoot out and hit me in the face before I could react.  These people are so stupid, I've started rooting for the Master.

 

Barnes was pretty feisty.  Does he have Master juice in him?  Did I miss something?

Barnes has to be dead, right? Even if he's had a little Master juice, he wouldn't survive being tossed off a train, would he?

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What I am sick of is Zack whining for his mom when he has seen her and knows what she has become. He is old enough to understand his mom is a vampire that will turn him the minute she gets a chance and unless he would rather that life, he needs to shut it. I know I sound heartless but it just bugs me that someone is probably going to try to protect him from himself with dire consequences.

Edited by lasandi
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On one level, I think he's more about maintaining the balance of power. With Eph gone, they're down one big strong guy, so a new one conveniently pops in. Could have been Gus, but he's taking forever. How many times now has he been specifically led to the main plot, only to get lost again?

On another level, Fitz is the one person there who knows more about Palmer and Stoneheart's security than Abe does. Wouldn't surprise me a bit if Palmer is the first one to get his mits on the Tuxedo Ramen, only to get it stolen right out from under him.

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I don't get why Zach 2.0 closed himself from his dad.  He may miss his mom, but he doesn't have to hate his dad.  Eph tried hard in S1 to have a relationship with Zach 1.0 and was still fighting for joint custody before mom got a worm in her eye.

 

The little boy in the monastery is what Zach 2.0 should be.

 

Eph was better in this episode; he has to be willing to do whatever it takes to stop the vamp apocalypse.  However, his comment about not wanting to leave Zach with people he hardly knows was damn wrong.  These people have always been willing to protect Zach.  Fet and Dutch went with Eph to grab Zach from the bus.

 

Palmer's assistant is boring and has the personality of cardboard.  She knows that Palmer's slimy, but she's still willing to be his assistant/possible sex buddy to be a part of the priviledged.  Their dancing/"foreplay" was all sorts of creepy.  Where's Eichhorst?  He needs to stop focusing on his B&B and to throw her off the balcony. 

 

Palmer is a boring villian.  I would rather have Eichhorst as the main villian/main link to the Master.

 

I don't even remember if Bolivar was in this episode.  Even as a vamp, he still wants to wear his wig--hilarious.

 

I like Dutch when she keeps her angst to herself. 

 

As always, Fet is awesome.

 

Gus needs a storyline.  Being aimless in NYC is a waste of his time.

 

Was that Quinlan at the end of the episode?  I liked the good vamps, so I wanted them to live and to learn their backstory.  What a waste of good characters.  No need to introduce the good vamps if Quinlan came shortly after their deaths.

 

Good to see Fitzwilliam join Abraham et al. 

Edited by spaulding
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Zzzzzzzz... Oh, it's over? That was long and uneventful. Cutting your hair and drinking at the same time seems like maybe not the safest.

 

And why would you need to get stinking drunk to cut your hair? Cut a finger/toe/limb off yes. But hair? The earth is more in danger than we thought.

 

"What I am sick of is Zack whining for his mom when he has seen her and knows what she has become. "

 

Well now with Eph and everyone else out and about the spider kids can go ahead and find him now.... that would be fun.

 

 

So was the hooded guy at the end that got off the private jet a senior member of the Vompire Team Six hierarchy ?

[a tiny bit of shame] New Vompire team member from the previews was sorta hot [/only a tiny bit]

Edited by Monty9
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Why did Eph stick to the CDC on his fake ID? Just the name of that organization would throw up red flags. And why is Palmer's assistant wearing shareware? It was peeking out from her skirt when she sat on Palmer's couch.

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The train bothered me in terms of world building.  That appeared to be a normal Northeast Regional train.  Why was it so empty?

 

 

It bothered me because it looks nothing like any train that runs along the Northeast Corridor.  But then again, in a fictional world where Red Hook is the epicenter of Brooklyn and suddenly has subway access via Carroll Gardens, I guess it makes sense.  

 

I did appreciate Dutch, Fet, and Nora showing off their skills, although I would have liked it better had anyone put two and two together about how she was diagnosing the virus.  She's a sad-eyed lady with a blacklight - anyone capable of flipping an on/off switch and seeing two feet in front of them could join the diagnosis team, but no, just Nora and her fancy flashlight to the rescue.

 

I'd build an entire Ikea line of baby furniture if it means we can have Eichhorst again.  His scenes with Setrakian are the rare times I'm not embarrassed to be watching this show.

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I know it's been joked about a lot and I've been right there with it, but in all honesty, I actually Corey Stoll's acting got better once he finally killed that wig.  I'm dead serous!  I mean, Eph is still a dolt on a lot of levels, but I found him way more watchable tonight, and Stoll seemed to have more fire in him.  I swear, I think that horrible wig had been weighing him down this entire time.  Thank goodness it's dead.  Although Eph actually getting himself drunk to do it and the seriousness surrounding him throwing his hair away was a hilarious overkill.  All that was missing was having everyone gathered around a funeral pyre and mourning the loss of The Hair.

 

Anyway though, it worked enough that it got him to D.C. at least, but he did get a scare when he bumped into Barnes, and they have a big tussle in an abandoned train cart.  It ends with Eph tossing Barnes out of a moving train, but we'll see if he magically survives or not.

 

Zach was his usual obnoxious self, so I'll instead, spend time on wondering what in the hell was Eph going on about not wanting to leave him in the hands of people he "barely knew."  Really, Eph?  At this point, you know damn well that, whatever personal issues you have, Abe, Vasiliy, and even Dutch can be trusted with Zach.  Granted, I'm grading on a curve when it comes to this show, but in this universe, those three are decent enough.  What is your deal, man?

 

I'm actually looking forward to Nora, Dutch,and Vasiliy working for Justine's group, and them helping them out, like Dutch and Vasiliy showing the men better ways to kill vamps, and Nora showing a better way to find who is infected or not.  I'm sure the truce won't last forever, but I'm glad they're doing something productive, while Eph is doing whatever the hell he is doing.

 

Abe goes off to see Marlo from Season 1 (yes, yes, I know he has another name, but Jamie Hector will always be Marlo to me), about that book, and Marlo starts making phone calls.  But it sounds like Palmer's now got wind of this, so it will probably be a race to see who gets the book first.  Also, Fitzwilliam as already decided to help out (I hope.)  I really have seen Roger Cross in too much stuff, because I totally knew it was him under the hood, because he was walking in a way Roger Cross tends to walk.

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The inconsistent vampire infection/hunting and curfew, the incompetent ignorant authorities and citizens, and lack of evacuation and empty trains is clearly being done to ramp up to the drama, but failing miserably. And why is Gus being wasted like this? I was so looking forward to his hooking with the Ancients' crew and doing some serious strigoi killing this season. I wonder who the showrunner is. It can't be Del Toro, he is too busy making moviss.  

 

Carlton Cuse, one of the people who fucked up Lost, so he has experience with sloppy inconsistent shows.

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If Justine's been using the 72-hour quarantine method to figure out who's infected, then how has she been able to determine that Staten Island is a "plague free zone"? People were crossing over on the ferry without waiting 72 hours to disembark.

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ZACH: I'm not going to go home without Mom.
DEM: You are truly psychotic.
EPH: You know what magical thinking is, Zach?
DEM: Huzzah!
 
Geez that kid.  It was funny how he ended up being left in the bunker all alone. Let's hope next ep opens with Mom and the skitters sniffing down the door.
 
I liked the team working with Justine of Staten Island. For a moment I was worried they were going to turn her into a stock, fascist-like villain, especially with those ambiguous looks the team were giving her.
 
Who was the vombie who landed in New Jersey at the end?
 

Could have been Gus, but he's taking forever. How many times now has he been specifically led to the main plot, only to get lost again?

Hee! So true.

Edited by DEM
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I actually am excited about this show again. It was a long slog to this point and I don't think this episode was the best, but I'm so happy with where it seems to be going. Instead of hiding away, I'm thrilled the team has met up with the Vamp hunting officials and are sharing knowledge. So often in shows/movies like this, people don't talk but here they're trading info and ideas. It should make everyone better at dealing with the infection because now the Staten Island crew knows about silver, knows how to detect the virus faster, knows that even a little knick will kill you and knows about the light, while our team got a heads up about Kelly's Spider Kids. That's so much progress in one day.

 

Zack is the dumbest kid ever. I get why Eph drinks. 

 

Thank you for finally losing the wig. Eph didn't need to go to Washington. If he'd stuck around and gone with the team to meet Justine, he could have handed her the vamp infection and she could have used her resources to spread it. But Eph is all about his own glory so of course he needed to go and be the hero.

 

I don't care about the old book. I can't believe Coco Marchand is dating that old man. I get that he's rich, but come on, he's old and creepy.

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Good to know gay bars are still open in the vampire apocalypse!

 

Was this from the episode?

 

I haven't watched the episode. Did anything meaningful or important happen that would be worth the effort of watching this episode?

 

I stopped watching the show last episode when it started off with some weird segue. I'm not sure what this show is aiming for exactly since the infection seems to have little effect on the day to day life of the civilians which is just bizarre.

This episode did finally manage to make the vampire plague seem like something the city was taking seriously. 

 

Speaking of taking the plague seriously, was there any mention of a health screening before Eph left the city.  It seemed kind of strange that someone asked him to submit for screening once the train was on the move.

Edited by maczero
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never mentioned it, but did the news reporter outside the finance people building really say something like 'oh it appears we have some protesters' when the vamps start jumping off buildings & attacking the rich people? who would be protesting people trying to rebuild?

 

why is she out at night anyway? why is that gay club open & everyone acting like things are normal?

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Zack is the dumbest kid ever. I get why Eph drinks. 

 

This kid is such a pain they should hand him over to the vamps as a holiday treat.  He's got one expression - constipation.  Even Mommy Vamp is going to regret it if she manages to snag his snotty ass.  Whatshisname's vamp mommy, the one he locked in the apartment is better company than this kid.

 

As some of you have mentioned, I was shocked that Show actually had the team share knowledge with others and learn something they didn't know.  I'm hoping this means expanding the effort in a more (for a vamp show) realistic way.  I'm also happy that Show didn't waste time on getting Fet out of jail.  

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