S01.E01: Happily Ever After Arranged?

[Meredith Quill]

Series Blurb:

 

In “Arranged,” three couples from different cultural backgrounds have one thing in common -- a belief in arranged marriages. From a young Romani gypsy couple in New York City, to a southern couple from the Bible belt, to a couple raised by traditional Eastern Indian parents living in Los Angeles – these brides and grooms don’t just marry each other, their unions include their entire family. Viewers will see each couple’s relationship from the lead-up to their weddings, to the several months after the reality of married life sinks in.

 

 

 

Episode Synopsis:

 

TBA

[Primetimer]

fyi's new reality show follows more people who've let other people pick their spouses for them. Is it worth RSVP-ing yes?

Read the story

[The Evil One]

I'll be watching the hell out of this!

[LotusEsq]

The first show isn't even over and I'm already annoyed.  The Indian couple is not arranged, they met on a matrimonial site (shaadi.com anyone?)!  My brother met his wife there, I've met ex boyfriends there, I know married couples that met there...none of them say they were arranged because they weren't.  Also Ragini saying Punjabis & Gujratis were like New Yorkers and Texans, just 2 different subcultures, could not be more incorrect.  They speak different languages, eat different food, have different traditions, etc.  I can foresee them having more clashes about it so it would make sense to actually explain.

[wait.what]

Did anyone else fee kinda sorry for the 17 year old Romany (sp?) who was "sold" for the $10000.00 "dowry"? Now she belongs to the husbands family? WTH? Christian seemed very immature. Video games and lots of hairspray. His mom was cute, but scary.

[PityFree]

Hate the Southern couple already. Since when is dating for 4 years an arranged marriage?

[zxy556575]

So basically 1 out of 3 is arranged. I'm still gonna watch but I don't appreciate the hoodwinking, show.

[ethalfrida]

The Romani couple is so cute. I love the groom's look. They seem so different from the MBFGW Romanis. But then the mom laughed about their short life spans, saying if they reached age 70 they were doing well. But they were laughing about it, soooo...

[belladonna77]

How are the southern couple even "arranged?"  Because their moms wanted them to get married?  BS.  Either they did a lot of justification to the producers about how they were arranged or the producers really stretched the term "arranged."

 

I feel sorry for the Romani kids.  They're too young to get married.  

 

The guy in the Indian couple seems like a mama's boy.  His mom hand feeds him food?  Yikes.

[PityFree]

Does the rough looking Southern woman have a job? Or does she just shop and plan her wedding? 

[humbleopinion]

Like the Romani storyline.

Christan and his mother have sharp fashion style.

Christan and his father do not have the regional speech displayed by his mom.

But it works for her.

The other 2 couples...nothing to pique my interest yet.

[zxy556575]

I was also wondering what kind of venue allows events that start around 10pm and must go through the night.

[Sienna]

I may have had my biggest "da faq?!?!" moment ever as I listened to Michael's bride price analogy, likening Maria TO A SHIRT.

I feel terrible for her, and only slightly less so for Christian. At least he doesn't have to move in with a house full of total strangers, but the poor kid looked like he was ready to shit a brick when the ceremony started to close in.

[zxy556575]

I certainly understand not wanting to participate in a reality show, and even more so if you may or may not be wanted in various states on charges of fraudulent driveway repair work, but poor Marie looked so pale and alone. I'm sure her family members were somewhere off camera, but the editing made it seem like she was being thrown to the wolves.

 

Although from my admittedly skewed, TV-based knowledge of the Romani culture, I thought Christian's parents came off comparatively well and not wolf-like at all. I mean, yes, rules and tradition and brooking no dissent, but still pretty likable.

 

I also enjoyed Ragini and her whole "give me a fucking break" attitude about the extravagant wedding.

[ShaNaeNae]

I'm a little upset only 1 couple is actually arranged. And I'm hoping we don't find out that they've secretly been dating since early high school (they can't be done with high school, can they?). But I'm loving the Romani storyline. THIS is what I wish My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding is about. Real traditions and culture and not the BS made up by TLC done by trashy people. I do feel sorry for the young 'uns. They are too young to get married. Christian is adorable though, big hair and all.

 

I'll be back next week.

[TeapotWakeen]

I'm in.  I do find Christian adorable too, but his eyebrow gymnastics kill me!!

[Pepper Mostly]

I'll just pull up a chair over here, okay? I brought muffins!

 

Totally down for the Romani couple. The poor little girl did seem terrified, but it seems she was able to communicate with her MIL about her taste in dresses! She said she didn't like ball gowns and the MIL seemed hell bent on one, but at the wedding she wore a sleeker look. She looked so pretty. and so young. MIL made me laugh!

 

I read Peter Maas' book "King of the Gypsies" years and years ago, and I've been hooked ever since. There's not much out there about Gypsy culture so it would be nice to get another piece of the puzzle, even if its through the filter of a reality TV show. (here's an article I found about the subject of Maas' book, from 1989! http://articles.latimes.com/1989-05-28/local/me-1408_1_bimbos-gypsies-seeks-new-image-new-king)Check out this quote!

 

"Although Tene does not believe in selling daughters as brides, he suggested that a dowry could be offered instead. But it would be a mistake, Tene said, to arrange marriages where the bride was literally given away.

"If you get a dog for free, you aren't going to treat it as good as a dog you paid for," Tene reasoned, reaching for another cigarette." !!

 

Indian couple left me cold. I like the guy but the girlfriend seems wound up kind of tight.

 

Southern couple? Oh my god. Josh or whatever his name is should run from this trainwreck. Girl is only 24, looks 40, and is so shallow she makes a rain puddle look like Lake Superior. And she does that thing where she thinks she's cute and adorable by winking at the camera and saying she always gets what she wants. Ick. 

[Passthepopcorn]

Romani. So young to get married, it hurts. But it is normal in their culture, many people they know have gone through the same thing and they expect it, so they have that support. The families are really close. Still... The dowry, well, it is what every generation has done so if the family didn't pay, it would probably be:1) and insult to the in laws and 2) an insult to their daughter because you are not making sure she will be well taken care of. Each culture is a world!

Indians: seems like a fusion of traditional and modern...

Southerners: Her Dad seems like a decent and very traditional man. She is sweet, but acts as if she has no clue where money comes from. I don't think she does, like a young child. A husband with his feet on Earth is the best thing that could happen to her. Poor guy.

Edited April 17, 2015 by Passthepopcorn

[AdorkableWitch]

I am disappointed in the Southern couple. No, sweetie, not all of us did pageants and were cheerleaders. I was really hoping for a Duggar-esque type arrangement with some fundamentalists Christians. 

[Bella]

My take on 5 of the 6 individuals was some variation of being able to see where they were coming from and the rationale for them getting married. I even liked Ragani, the Indian woman. She's intense, but I think it's because she's determined and willing to stand up for herself, and I endorse that. 

 

But Meghan, the Southern girl? No. No way. I don't see what she brings to the marriage beyond being a warm body of the groom's preferred gender. So why does she think she's such a prize, when she might ping average on a very good day? The Southern mothers can get off of my TV and stay off as well.

 

It also irked me when any of those three would attribute something to being Southerners. They stopped just short of saying stupid things like "here in the South, we brush our teeth after dinner" or "Southern girls have thumbs" or "Southerners believe that water is wet." Idiots. I know lots of Southerners who are intelligent, thoughtful people with innumerable stellar traits. These three dopes do not represent all Southerners.

[Pepper Mostly]

 

It also irked me when any of those three would attribute something to being Southerners. They stopped just short of saying stupid things like "here in the South, we brush our teeth after dinner" or "Southern girls have thumbs" or "Southerners believe that water is wet." Idiots. I know lots of Southerners who are intelligent, thoughtful people with innumerable stellar traits. These three dopes do not represent all Southerners.

hahahaha-that was driving me bonkers! "here in the south, we don't like to talk about how much our pageant gowns cost". I don't get why she thinks she's such a prize. Her farmer boy (med student and headed for a "Diseases of the Rich" specialty) seems like a nice guy, grounded, and no nonsense. Why is he saddling himself with haggard, shrill Meghan?

[Rahul]

The first show isn't even over and I'm already annoyed.  The Indian couple is not arranged, they met on a matrimonial site (shaadi.com anyone?)!  My brother met his wife there, I've met ex boyfriends there, I know married couples that met there...none of them say they were arranged because they weren't.  Also Ragini saying Punjabis & Gujratis were like New Yorkers and Texans, just 2 different subcultures, could not be more incorrect.  They speak different languages, eat different food, have different traditions, etc.  I can foresee them having more clashes about it so it would make sense to actually explain.

 

Ah, the ole bait and switch. I'm sure if this network had cast a wider net or tried a bit harder they could have found found some legitimately arranged marriages in the US, but only the Romani couple truly qualify on the show.

 

And yes, India is truly a subcontinent so a better analogy would be comparing the states of India to different countries in Europe (ie. Norway and Hungary, Spain and Hungary) with entirely different languages, ways of dress, cuisine, customs, etc. 

 

I'm Indian but my parents did not have an arranged marriage; they met in the USA. They divorced when I was very young which I think quite interesting considering all of their siblings who had arranged marriages are still together.

 

My grandparents were from a generation where well-to-do families arranged the betrothal of their offspring very early on, possibly before they were even born. I know my maternal grandmother was married at 14 but did not move into her in-laws home until 18.

 

Did anyone else fee kinda sorry for the 17 year old Romany (sp?) who was "sold" for the $10000.00 "dowry"? Now she belongs to the husbands family? WTH? Christian seemed very immature. Video games and lots of hairspray. His mom was cute, but scary.

 

I found it interesting that the Romani people who have been genetically proven to be descended from NW Indian populations still have some kind of dowry system in place, though it is reversed from the typical payer/payee model. Actually, I couldn't help but thinking how much the Gypsy family could pass for Indian and Christian's grandmother looks very much like a Punjabi family friend.

 

I agree, Christian is immature but in his defense the kid is only 17 or 18. At that age I was a freshman in college--I cannot even fathom getting married then (though I did receive a couple of proposals all the way from India then, strangely enough).

[The Evil One]

Oh boy. I agree the Romani couple is the most intriguing and most closely aligns with what I think of when I think "arranged marriage." The other two seem like "parent approved" marriages. Christian looks like the missing member of a boy band. And when your bachelor party is your mom taking you to an amusement park? You are too young to get married.

[ethalfrida]

Oh boy. I agree the Romani couple is the most intriguing and most closely aligns with what I think of when I think "arranged marriage." .........And when your bachelor party is your mom taking you to an amusement park? You are too young to get married.

LOL, I'd forgotten the batchelor party! But they are the most intriguing as you said.

[Katmai]

This is interesting, but only the Romani story. I agree with all the previous posts. Chris' mom appears to be "my way or the highway" so good luck to his bride dealing with her. I did find it extremely chilling when they were at the dress shop and future MIL said she might be the devil. Way to endear yourself and guarantee a not good relationship with your son's wife. I know nothing about gypsy's, Romani, etc. but I'm eager to watch them. How can Chris' parents afford this big wedding knowing they'll be doing it again in two years when their middle son turns 18? I guess "doing more driveways"?

 

BUT as a Southern woman, born & raised, I just can't with MissSCMeghan. She's everything I've never been except for being a Daddy's Girl, otherwise she perpetuates negative stereotypes that need to just die off. The Southern moms appeared to be two gossipy neighbors who wanted their kids to get married. Daddy just swallowed that $7500 like it was nothing. I would never spend anything near the cost of this wedding on my own if my parents were paying for it. Looks like some HUGE money battles in the future for Josh & MissSpoiled. He should cut & run.  

[Whistler]

Macthekat wrote: <snip> "Daddy just swallowed that $7500 like it was nothing. I would never spend anything near the cost of this wedding on my own if my parents were paying for it. Looks like some HUGE money battles in the future for Josh & MissSpoiled. He should cut & run." 

 

 

I agree. I think Daddy was actually planning the true total for the wedding would run 40K but purposely told MissSpoiled Meghan the limit was 30K, knowing that she would run over. He really didn't seem to flinch at an extra $7500--pretty much like he was expecting she would do this. . . and like she has probably done so many times before regarding anything money.

 

Edited April 17, 2015 by Whistler

[Bella]

I agree. I think Daddy was actually planning the true total for the wedding would run 40K but purposely told MissSpoiled Meghan the limit was 30K, knowing that she would run over. He really didn't seem to flinch at an extra $7500--pretty much like he was expecting she would do this. . . and like she has probably done so many times before regarding anything money.

 

That's exactly what I thought. He lied to her about his real budget, expected her to go over by $10-15K, and was relieved when she only went over by $7500.

[ShaNaeNae]

This is interesting, but only the Romani story. I agree with all the previous posts. Chris' mom appears to be "my way or the highway" so good luck to his bride dealing with her. I did find it extremely chilling when they were at the dress shop and future MIL said she might be the devil. Way to endear yourself and guarantee a not good relationship with your son's wife. I know nothing about gypsy's, Romani, etc. but I'm eager to watch them. How can Chris' parents afford this big wedding knowing they'll be doing it again in two years when their middle son turns 18? I guess "doing more driveways"?

 

BUT as a Southern woman, born & raised, I just can't with MissSCMeghan. She's everything I've never been except for being a Daddy's Girl, otherwise she perpetuates negative stereotypes that need to just die off. The Southern moms appeared to be two gossipy neighbors who wanted their kids to get married. Daddy just swallowed that $7500 like it was nothing. I would never spend anything near the cost of this wedding on my own if my parents were paying for it. Looks like some HUGE money battles in the future for Josh & MissSpoiled. He should cut & run.  

 

I think the gypsies that do the driveways are the infamous (white trash) Rumney's you see on TLC. They are the driveway "pavers". I still don't know what these kind of gypsies do, but they seem more in tune with tradition and not just being trash, stealing from people, fighting in public and calling it the "Rumney way".

 

I did read the Southern couple

got married and get this...lived with his brother for like a year! I guess they moved near Vanderbilt where he's going to do his residency.

Edited April 18, 2015 by Bella
spoiler tags

[LennieBriscoe]

Re: "Gypsy" and "Romani" ("Rumney"?!)---

 

"Roma" is the correct term referring to all related groups, regardless of their country of origin....

heteronyms ("Gypsy" or equivalent terms), as well as administrative terms such as "Gens du Voyage" (referring in fact to an ethnic group but not acknowledging ethnic identification) are not in line with European recommendations.

Source.

Edited April 18, 2015 by Bella
remove quote of previously untagged spoiler

[ChiCricket]

oops

Edited April 20, 2015 by ChiCricket

[ChiCricket]

 

Macthekat wrote: <snip> "Daddy just swallowed that $7500 like it was nothing. I would never spend anything near the cost of this wedding on my own if my parents were paying for it. Looks like some HUGE money battles in the future for Josh & MissSpoiled. He should cut & run." 

 

 

I agree. I think Daddy was actually planning the true total for the wedding would run 40K but purposely told MissSpoiled Meghan the limit was 30K, knowing that she would run over. He really didn't seem to flinch at an extra $7500--pretty much like he was expecting she would do this. . . and like she has probably done so many times before regarding anything money.

 

Sometimes stuff like that doesn't work though. My oldest daughter is chronically late and drives the entire family nuts. We started always telling her something was one (or two!) hours earlier than she needs to be somewhere.

   She's obviously caught on to our plan,though, and must just calculate what the target really time is and is still always late. It's so freakin' rude, but she's 46 yrs old and I can't do a  thing about it.

        It's embarrassing to me that anyone would think she was brought up that way. (she wasn't)

   So I could see MissSpoiled thinking like that, and then tacking on extra bucks in her mind.

 You, know, what she thinks daddums REALLY would be likely to cough up.

Edited April 20, 2015 by ChiCricket

[MsPH]

What a scam this show is. One couple is arranged, one met through a matchmaking site (don't half the world these days?) and one's from a small town so their parents know each other. People don't usually think 4 years of dating or living together before marriage, when they hear the term 'arranged marriage'.

 

Gypsies are so weird, no matter where they live. I've watched the original Big Fat Gypsy Weddings and even though they're Irish gypsies, they're really similar. Kids get married as adolescents, girls just stay at home and make babies, weddings are ridiculous. I'm also wondering where the money comes from. Christian's dad has a wife and 3(?) kids to support and now he has to pay 10-15k for dowries for all their brides as well as the ridiculous wedding costs. How on earth? Do they print their own money or something?

 

The Indian couple is interesting, because it's kind of like what Davina from MAFS probably wanted to avoid. I do find it fake that she's supposedly only now thinking about what's expected of her as a wife, when they've been living together for years.

 

The Southern couple is a total mystery to me. He seems like a smart realistic guy, I mean he's in med school so he can't be a total idiot, so why would he even think of marrying that bimbo? I swear she has like two braincells rubbing against each other. And she's not even pretty! Has he not come across anything better in college? Poor guy.

[Tara Ariano]

"Roma" is the correct term referring to all related groups, regardless of their country of origin....

heteronyms ("Gypsy" or equivalent terms), as well as administrative terms such as "Gens du Voyage" (referring in fact to an ethnic group but not acknowledging ethnic identification) are not in line with European recommendations.

 

That's what I thought too, but the official site has it "Romani," which I assumed meant that's how the family identified itself.

[sookisooki]

So at the end of the season do we get to see who lasts and who doesn't? like that other show? I thought that I would see a variety of arranged marriages instead of constant focus on just three couples.  

 

I also think that the talent search department was lazy.  Were there no 'sister wives'/Warren Jeff polygamist camps to pounce on?

[AdorkableWitch]

That's what I thought too, but the official site has it "Romani," which I assumed meant that's how the family identified itself.

It seems at least in the US, the cultures also self divide. There is a big difference between the Romani and Romanichal cultures. 

[fliptopbox]

Besides the whole Romani culture I am wondering what Christian's family's ethicnicity is. I can't really tell. Could be anything from Italian to Hispanic, considering the boys really seem to love the Jersey shore guido style.  I'd also be curious what their family does for a living that they can afford to pay $10-15 thousand as a dowry for Maria and afford the lavish wedding spread....and then they're going to have to go through it two more times for the younger sons. Papa Christian better have a decent income to be able to afford all that. Also, when the other two sons finally get hitched will their wives be moving into that small condo as well? I can see a shitload of conflict coming if that ends up happening, because it doesn't seem as though Christian has any aspirations (that we've seen) to get out of his parents' home. I just hope that Maria lays the smackdown on Christian about his behavior, and soon. She needs to break out of that wallflower mode if she ever expects him to take her seriously as his wife. I know the man is supposed to be "the boss", but that doesn't necessarily mean that Maria needs to be a shrinking violet and never give any input or opinions about anything. I also wonder about their insurance situation, because she still has braces and those aren't cheap. Christian is probably covered by his parents' policy (if they even have one), but I have no idea how that could change now that he's a married man. 

[moonxyz]

Finally got around to watching this.

Veeral (sp?) is very good looking. But I don't know if anyone would be good enough for his family

Christian is a douche.

The southern couple bore me, I fast forward their sections. 

[JenE4]

One episode, and I am hooked! The Romani kids are fascinating, the other two couples aren't even "arranged," but they're still interesting.

Christian and Maria are probably still in high school--or at least Maria is. The ice sculpture had the date Sept. 30, 2014 and she's 17, so she's going to spend her entire senior year of high school as a married "woman"?! I need more background on that! Lol @ Fliptopbox--Yes, how is this poor kid going to get her braces off?! Well, Christian's family "owns" her now! But, yeah, it doesn't seem that Christian has a job yet that we're aware of. Maybe they will get Obamacare.

Oh, boy, Meghan is a piece of work! Say "big, stone house" one more time! And needing a new, flimsy, name-brand purse every few months?! But their moms are friends and they've been dating for four years, so I think Josh could have dumped her at any time. He's certainly not being forced into an arranged marriage like the poor Romani kids who I don't think have even spoken to each other much!

And the Indian couple are SO far away from arranged it's not even like they're stretching the definition as the Southern mom's who probably thought it would be cute if their kids dated! I don't recall the guy's name, but so his mom and sister helped him scroll through an Indian dating site--and he apparently dated a lot of women from there. Then he chooses the one woman that his mom seemingly doesn't approve of, as Ragini keeps saying. Her mom also says that she didn't raise her to be traditional. So their entire storyline is how DIFFERENT their families are and how they'll make a marriage work despite that. They're also living together and twice the age of the Romani kids! I bet they could have easily found an Indian couple who were arranged. I think their family differences are interesting. But don't insult our intelligence by trying to tell us they're arranged.