Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[SweetieDarling]

40 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

Whenever people can't remember my name, they usually call me Margaret, no matter which part of the country I'm in 😁. I think it's because my name has 3 syllables, just like Margaret (well, that's all I could come up with!)

🤣 I have a similar issue; I'm often called Debbie. Even my spam political texts are addressed to Debbie or Deborah🤷‍♀️.

I have a 2 syllable name that starts with D (?)

[StatisticalOutlier]

2 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

I think it's because my name has 3 syllables, just like Margaret

In my neck of the woods, Margaret is a 2-syllable name.

[Anela]

9 hours ago, SweetieDarling said:

🤣 I have a similar issue; I'm often called Debbie. Even my spam political texts are addressed to Debbie or Deborah🤷‍♀️.

I have a 2 syllable name that starts with D (?)

I keep getting spam texts and calls, for Kevin.  I have no idea who that is, he must have had this number before I did, but I’ve had it for ten years now (it’s just hitting me how long I’ve had it).

I had one phone call from a woman who actually had my dad’s name, and wanted to do something with our property.  Obvious scam call. As soon as I finally got through to her, that I didn’t own any property, and that the name she had wasn’t mine, she hung up on me. 😄

[Dimity]

My name related pet peeve is when strangers assume they can call me by my first name.  I find this especially annoying when it's sales people trying to sound like we're friends when we obviously aren't.  It comes across as smarmy not friendly.

[emma675]

I have two peeves tonight, my neighbor and myself.

My neighbor let his incredibly loud small dog bark continuously in his backyard for almost an hour tonight, a sound that I can hear in every room of my house. I'm peeved at myself for snapping and yelling "shut up!" through a window. I'm sure my surrounding neighbors think I'm crazy.

I keep my distance from this neighbor because his chihuahua got loose a few years ago and tried to bite me and my dog as we were walking past his house (my dog was on a leash). I knocked on his door to let him know the dog was loose and going after people and he shrugged and shut the door on me. 

Edited October 6 by emma675

[BlueSkies]

I can't stand the greeting of What's Up.  I feel like I don't know how to answer that.  Like do I summarize everything that happened to me since the last time I saw you?

 

I like the greeting of How Are You better.  

[Yeah No]

On 10/4/2024 at 1:33 PM, Absolom said:

My daughter shares my dislike of nicknames.  Her children are named as she is with a one syllable name that can't be shortened.  

My name is two syllables but you can't shorten it anyway. When I was a kid I used to envy people that could have nicknames but now I'm just as happy without one.

On 10/4/2024 at 9:19 PM, Calvada said:

I worked with a guy who added ie/y to every name - Bob became Bobby, Barb became Barbie, Joan was Joanie, etc.  (I think he was enormously frustrated by my name because you can't do that with my name.)  

Haha, he would have been frustrated by my name too! 

[Katy M]

13 hours ago, BlueSkies said:

I can't stand the greeting of What's Up.  I feel like I don't know how to answer that.  Like do I summarize everything that happened to me since the last time I saw you?

I just say "the sky."  

[Yeah No]

1 hour ago, Katy M said:

I just say "the sky."  

That's what my father used to say to that!

[annzeepark914]

On 10/5/2024 at 10:57 PM, BlueSkies said:

I can't stand the greeting of What's Up.  I feel like I don't know how to answer that.  Like do I summarize everything that happened to me since the last time I saw you?

 

I like the greeting of How Are You better.  

People who say, "What's up" are not really interested in a summary of what's been going on in your life (same with "How are you"). IMO, these are usually just greeting words, like "Hello".  Of course, there are some folks who genuinely are interested when they say "how are you" and really want to know what's been going on since the last time they saw you. 

[Mindthinkr]

I like the greeting:  “It’s a pleasure to see you” 

 

[annzeepark914]

"Hi...nice to see you!" works well too. Of course, "whaddup?" would be an interesting experiment next time I run into a neighbor 😄.

[Annber03]

7 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

People who say, "What's up" are not really interested in a summary of what's been going on in your life (same with "How are you"). IMO, these are usually just greeting words, like "Hello".  

Exactly. That ,and in my experience, at least, "What's up?" is generally a more casual greeting among friends/family. I wouldn't greet my boss that way, or expect her to greet me that way, but if I meet up with a friend, we might greet each other that way. 

[Is Everyone Gone]

I really really hate it when people call a baby the "ours baby." It just sounds so precious and twee. It's almost always to differentiate between the stepkids and the "ours" kids too. I hate it deeply.

[Ancaster]

On 10/5/2024 at 6:13 PM, Anela said:

I keep getting spam texts and calls, for Kevin.  I have no idea who that is, he must have had this number before I did, but I’ve had it for ten years now (it’s just hitting me how long I’ve had it).

I had one phone call from a woman who actually had my dad’s name, and wanted to do something with our property.  Obvious scam call. As soon as I finally got through to her, that I didn’t own any property, and that the name she had wasn’t mine, she hung up on me. 😄

Can I ask why you would try to call her?  Isn't that just adding your phone number to a list of live people recognized by scammers, who will now continue to call?

[Ancaster]

8 hours ago, Is Everyone Gone said:

I really really hate it when people call a baby the "ours baby." It just sounds so precious and twee. It's almost always to differentiate between the stepkids and the "ours" kids too. I hate it deeply.

Who says this?  Where do you live?  What does it even mean?  I'm befuddled.

Edited October 8 by Ancaster

[Anela]

28 minutes ago, Ancaster said:

Can I ask why you would try to call her?  Isn't that just adding your phone number to a list of live people recognized by scammers, who will now continue to call?

As soon as I finally got it through to her, that I wasn’t my dad.  He has a name that can also be a woman’s name.  

I

 

[Ancaster]

I got a recall notice in the mail regarding a possible defect in my new car, telling me I need to take it to the dealer to get it fixed.  I call the nearest dealer - they don't make appointments for recalls (WTF?).  I call another dealer - they can't make an appointment and even if I'm first in line with my car when they open at 8am they can't tell me how long it will take, even though this is a simple fix that they've done many times before. Again, WTF? I asked them to book me a ride back to my place but they don't do that any more either.

They suggest I call Uber and add it to my claim.  I know car sales people are sleazeballs, but now the service people are douchebags too?

Edited October 8 by Ancaster

[Yeah No]

2 hours ago, Ancaster said:

I got a recall notice in the mail regarding a possible defect in my new car, telling me I need to take it to the dealer to get it fixed.  I call the nearest dealer - they don't make appointments for recalls (WTF?).  I call another dealer - they can't make an appointment and even if I'm first in line with my car when they open at 8am they can't tell me how long it will take, even though this is a simple fix that they've done many times before. Again, WTF? I asked them to book me a ride back to my place but they don't do that any more either.

They suggest I call Uber and add it to my claim.  I know car sales people are sleazeballs, but now the service people are douchebags too?

My husband was a service advisor for many years and that position has changed a lot since he was doing it like everything has. 15 years ago something like that would have been less common than it is now, although he worked in higher end vehicles like Mercedes Benz where the primarily rich customers would complain bitterly to management if they got treated like that. It seems to be worse with some manufacturers than with others.

I would recommend calling more dealerships if you can and if you keep getting that reaction, report it to the manufacturer. I am sure they would not like hearing that. Dealership service depts. are constantly sending out questionnaires to customers about their recent service experience because the manufacturer holds them to strict standards and if they even get one less than stellar response on them there's hell to pay at the dealership because they lose certain financial perks if their ratings are too low. So I would suggest complaining to the manufacturer about all those dealerships. Hopefully they will listen and want to make it right.

Also if you just don't want to put that much into it, wait a month or so and try again. If this is a new recall they might be swamped with people just like you but won't be later and you might get a different response. Of course wouldn't it be nice of them to give you a heads up on that as a courtesy instead of giving you that kind of ridiculous treatment? Yeah, that's the way the world used to be but not anymore, unfortunately.

ETA: It's also that dealerships probably hate doing recall work because they don't get paid as much for it as with other work. Same for warranty work although they don't act as badly about that. So they would tend to act a little less accommodating of it than other work. But the manufacturers would still care.

Edited October 8 by Yeah No

[Ancaster]

2 hours ago, Yeah No said:

My husband was a service advisor for many years and that position has changed a lot since he was doing it like everything has. 15 years ago something like that would have been less common than it is now, although he worked in higher end vehicles like Mercedes Benz where the primarily rich customers would complain bitterly to management if they got treated like that. It seems to be worse with some manufacturers than with others.

I would recommend calling more dealerships if you can and if you keep getting that reaction, report it to the manufacturer. I am sure they would not like hearing that. Dealership service depts. are constantly sending out questionnaires to customers about their recent service experience because the manufacturer holds them to strict standards and if they even get one less than stellar response on them there's hell to pay at the dealership because they lose certain financial perks if their ratings are too low. So I would suggest complaining to the manufacturer about all those dealerships. Hopefully they will listen and want to make it right.

Also if you just don't want to put that much into it, wait a month or so and try again. If this is a new recall they might be swamped with people just like you but won't be later and you might get a different response. Of course wouldn't it be nice of them to give you a heads up on that as a courtesy instead of giving you that kind of ridiculous treatment? Yeah, that's the way the world used to be but not anymore, unfortunately.

ETA: It's also that dealerships probably hate doing recall work because they don't get paid as much for it as with other work. Same for warranty work although they don't act as badly about that. So they would tend to act a little less accommodating of it than other work. But the manufacturers would still care.

Oh, believe me, my email/phone call to Toyota was already forming in my head as soon as the latest call ended.

(And I'll put my nice face on when I take the car in so I don't get shuffled to the bottom of the pile!)

[Is Everyone Gone]

6 hours ago, Ancaster said:

Who says this?  Where do you live?  What does it even mean?  I'm befuddled.

Its popular on reddit and parenting forums to differentiate between stepkids and non-stepkids.

[annzeepark914]

49 minutes ago, Is Everyone Gone said:

Its popular on reddit and parenting forums to differentiate between stepkids and non-stepkids.

I wonder how the stepchildren feel about this. There's something tacky & not nice about this term, "our/s baby".

[PRgal]

My take on "our child(ren)" vs "my child(ren)" is that the former means child(ren) of the current relationship and the latter, the ones from a previous relationship.  Those kids don't call the new spouse mom or dad and might not even live there full time.

[bluegirl147]

2 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

I wonder how the stepchildren feel about this. There's something tacky & not nice about this term, "our/s baby".

My son married a woman who had a daughter.  Then they had two daughters. The word step is never spoken.  They have three kids who are my grandkids.  Period.

[Wiendish Fitch]

It has always irritated me when people empty their hairbrushes into the sink, gunking up the drain. Use the trash or the toilet!

[EtheltoTillie]

Ooh, that's annoying about the car dealer.   We have a (very old) Subaru.  There's no Subaru dealer in Manhattan--never has been--so we have to go elsewhere, and it's very inconvenient when you do not have a second car.   Add to that I don't trust any car service people.  We bought the car on Long Island, and we took the car to that dealer for a recall a while back and they tried to sell us on something else.  They overcharge on everything.

Then I got lucky and we started going to another Long Island Subaru dealer where the service adviser/manager was a good friend of my brother-in-law's.  We did not feel cheated there.  (It's still a pain--we always have to devote a day to the matter of getting the car fixed.) 

So guess what--after 30 years he was fired because he wasn't upselling enough.  It's a dirty business.

Now we go to my brother-in-law's new (non-Subaru) service station, where he also is a good friend of the owner's.  My brother in law delivers newspapers, so he has to have working cars.  He rotates among a bunch of cheap used cars.

6 minutes ago, Wiendish Fitch said:

It has always irritated me when people empty their hairbrushes into the sink, gunking up the drain. Use the trash or the toilet!

God, who does this?  How stupid do you have to be? 

Edited October 8 by EtheltoTillie

[SoMuchTV]

13 hours ago, Is Everyone Gone said:

I really really hate it when people call a baby the "ours baby." It just sounds so precious and twee. It's almost always to differentiate between the stepkids and the "ours" kids too. I hate it deeply.

 

11 hours ago, Ancaster said:

Who says this?  Where do you live?  What does it even mean?  I'm befuddled.

 

4 hours ago, Is Everyone Gone said:

Its popular on reddit and parenting forums to differentiate between stepkids and non-stepkids.

I'm assuming it comes from Yours, Mine, & Ours, which was a book and movie back in the 60s about a blended family. (I think there's a newer remake as well.)  But I've never heard anyone actually using that term, that I can recall.

[KittyMom4]

1 hour ago, Wiendish Fitch said:

It has always irritated me when people empty their hairbrushes into the sink, gunking up the drain. Use the trash or the toilet!

Who does this? I've always emptied mine into the trash! 

The lady's room at my office always has long dark hairs in the sink, there's 3-4 women with long dark hair so I have no idea who it is (not that I'd call them out on it) so I just take a paper towel and wipe it out so it doesn't clog the drain. 

Along with that, my peeve is whatever person does their make up in there and gets lip gloss all over the counter and doesn't wipe it up. That shit is sticky/greasy and just smears unless you get a towel with soap and go to town on it. 

[graybrown bird]

You are a good person, KittyMom4.

[Ancaster]

4 hours ago, PRgal said:

My take on "our child(ren)" vs "my child(ren)" is that the former means child(ren) of the current relationship and the latter, the ones from a previous relationship.  Those kids don't call the new spouse mom or dad and might not even live there full time.

 

Even when we were married, my ex-husband used to say "my" daughter, etc, even when I was standing right next to him.  As I may have mentioned a million times before, he was (is) a narcissistic asshole.

[Ancaster]

2 hours ago, KittyMom4 said:

Who does this? I've always emptied mine into the trash! 

The lady's room at my office always has long dark hairs in the sink, there's 3-4 women with long dark hair so I have no idea who it is (not that I'd call them out on it) so I just take a paper towel and wipe it out so it doesn't clog the drain. 

Along with that, my peeve is whatever person does their make up in there and gets lip gloss all over the counter and doesn't wipe it up. That shit is sticky/greasy and just smears unless you get a towel with soap and go to town on it. 

 

1 hour ago, graybrown bird said:

You are a good person, KittyMom4.

You beat me to it, @graybrown bird.  I avert my eyes and try not to gag.

@KittyMom4 Could you maybe tape a note (typed for anonymity!) above the sink asking people to clean up stray hair/makeup and leave the area clean for the next person?  Of course, there will be those who "know" it's not directed at them, but it might help the socially clueless and those whose mommies always clean up after them.

[Bastet]

5 hours ago, bluegirl147 said:

My son married a woman who had a daughter.  Then they had two daughters. The word step is never spoken.  They have three kids who are my grandkids.  Period.

I think unless both spouses feel this way about the kids, they shouldn't blend families to begin with.  And I think it's great when the kids feel like their stepparent is another parent, and their stepsiblings are just siblings.  But I think it's terrible when adults expect kids to feel that way, especially early on (and, OMG, especially when the second marriage is because one of their parents died), and get angry with them when they accurately describe someone as a stepparent, stepsibling, or half-sibling.

[isalicat]

On 10/5/2024 at 7:57 PM, BlueSkies said:

I can't stand the greeting of What's Up.  I feel like I don't know how to answer that.  Like do I summarize everything that happened to me since the last time I saw you?

 

I like the greeting of How Are You better.  

Coming in late to say: I answer "what's up?" with "the sky!" and a smile. Makes people laugh, which is generally a good thing. "How are you?" I find more problematic as its often asked merely as a courtesy - the person asking really doesn't want to know, they just want the usual response of "Fine, fine..."...and I am usually fine but see this as a silly exercise of verbiage. 😺

[tearknee]

On 10/9/2024 at 6:51 AM, Bastet said:

I think unless both spouses feel this way about the kids, they shouldn't blend families to begin with.  And I think it's great when the kids feel like their stepparent is another parent, and their stepsiblings are just siblings.  But I think it's terrible when adults expect kids to feel that way, especially early on (and, OMG, especially when the second marriage is because one of their parents died), and get angry with them when they accurately describe someone as a stepparent, stepsibling, or half-sibling.

Yeah. Too many parents still consider their kids as property or subsets of them.

"We" still haven't ratified the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child.

My egg donor... as i say, I concur with J McCurdy's book's title. Ms. Egg Donor, being the [cis] female child model and actor and "Little Miss" was your dream in childhood not what i wanted for mine.

Edited October 9 by tearknee

[Dimity]

Fruit flies.  Ugh.  We've always had an occasional fruit fly, usually hovering over the bananas.  But this past week or two has been nuts.  I don't keep anything out that would attract them.  The only thing I can think of is we've started bringing in some of the plants that winter in the house.  But we've always done that and never had an issue.  On the plus side at least they don't bite and they're pretty slow so catching them isn't as bad as trying to get a mosquito or house fly but still.  Ugh.

[tearknee]

This specific example is from 1989 but it's worse in today's automated world with fewer humans doing the work. And still a peeve.

[Anela]

I tried a new internet tonight, because AT&T are phasing out our DSL, and we don't have fiber yet. ATT Air seems to be a bit faster, but it cut out for me, just a few hours after I installed it. I might try it for the next twenty-four hours, but I think it's going back. Which means we will be stuck with signing up with Spectrum. We don't have anything else available for us.

Also: I broke my phone - I think it's an 11 - about two months go, or more. I *finally* found my iPhone 8, which had no cracks in it, and has a cover on the back, and I dropped it on the floor, it landed on the screen, and now features a lot of cracks. I just went a bit dizzy, thinking about it. I found it in the pocket of my coat, and I don't know how it got there, because I used it in July. Just to download something to read on that phone. I can still use it, as long as the screen doesn't go the way of my other one (looking like it has ink over a significant part of the screen). I just can't believe thiat I cracked this screen, too. An hour after I found it again. 

Edited October 11 by Anela

[PRgal]

7 hours ago, tearknee said:

This specific example is from 1989 but it's worse in today's automated world with fewer humans doing the work. And still a peeve.

Holy hell, they even gave her a (traditionally) guy's name!  It's one thing to be Stefanie, but STEPHEN???  

[KittyMom4]

On 10/8/2024 at 3:43 PM, Ancaster said:

You beat me to it, @graybrown bird.  I avert my eyes and try not to gag.

@KittyMom4 Could you maybe tape a note (typed for anonymity!) above the sink asking people to clean up stray hair/makeup and leave the area clean for the next person?  Of course, there will be those who "know" it's not directed at them, but it might help the socially clueless and those whose mommies always clean up after them.

 

@Ancaster, years ago, when I worked in a different office, there was a little kitchenette that was shared among the nearby offices. It had a small sink, coffee maker and microwave. Someone started leaving dirty dishes from the cafe in there, next to the sink. They would sit there for days until I or someone would bring them back to the cafe. I got disgusted and typed a note that read "Please return your dirty dishes to the cafe, your mom doesn't work here" and taped it to the wall. A few days later it was taken down and an email was sent around that read, paraphrasing, "We don't need snarky, rude comments posted, if you have an issue with something please address it directly or come see us." from our HR dept. Don't get me started on my thoughts about HR, but if I knew who was leaving them there I would have addressed it directly!

The point of this rambling post is: If I feel like cleaning up someone's mess, that's on me, if not, I'll let someone else handle it. If the higher-ups don't want to address it then I'm not going to. 

 

[Browncoat]

Peeve of the day:  When I record a TV show, then play it back, but forget I'm watching a recording and sit through all the commercials instead of fast forwarding.

[SoMuchTV]

26 minutes ago, Browncoat said:

Peeve of the day:  When I record a TV show, then play it back, but forget I'm watching a recording and sit through all the commercials instead of fast forwarding.

Parallel peeve: when I’m watching something on an ad supported streamer and the ads come on. I reach for the remote and then realize, nope, can’t skip these. 

[tearknee]

Bad dubbing in vintage media.

[Ancaster]

Having to Google to understand referencess that the poster assumes everyone knows.  Such as one i just read, "xkcd".  What?

[Ancaster]

On 10/11/2024 at 10:00 AM, KittyMom4 said:

 

@Ancaster, years ago, when I worked in a different office, there was a little kitchenette that was shared among the nearby offices. It had a small sink, coffee maker and microwave. Someone started leaving dirty dishes from the cafe in there, next to the sink. They would sit there for days until I or someone would bring them back to the cafe. I got disgusted and typed a note that read "Please return your dirty dishes to the cafe, your mom doesn't work here" and taped it to the wall. A few days later it was taken down and an email was sent around that read, paraphrasing, "We don't need snarky, rude comments posted, if you have an issue with something please address it directly or come see us." from our HR dept. Don't get me started on my thoughts about HR, but if I knew who was leaving them there I would have addressed it directly!

The point of this rambling post is: If I feel like cleaning up someone's mess, that's on me, if not, I'll let someone else handle it. If the higher-ups don't want to address it then I'm not going to. 

 

I used to work in a small office where the boss would always leave his dirty mug by the sink at the end of the day.  When I was in charge of finding new office space, I intentionally picked one without a dedicated kitchen area, just a fridge and microwave.  No more dirty mugs.

[SoMuchTV]

2 hours ago, Ancaster said:

Having to Google to understand referencess that the poster assumes everyone knows.  Such as one i just read, "xkcd".  What?

xkcd is a long-running web comic that I’ve been reading for years. I think it was first put on my radar back in the aughts by my then college-age son, who also enlightened me about these things called “memes” and why cats has to haz cheeseburgers. Sometimes he’s thoughtful to his mom!

A bonus on xkcd is, if you hover or long press on the cartoon, you get the “alt text” which is a little joke within the joke. There are a lot I don’t get but I’m proud of myself when I do. 
 

https://xkcd.com

(Sorry, I know that was your peeve but I hope that was helpful)

Edited October 12 by SoMuchTV
Acknowledging the spirit of the thread

[DrSpaceman73]

Adding this to my list 

People who use the phrase 'my toxic trait' and them list some minor personal anecdote that is meaningless. 

'My toxic trait is i love chocolate!  '

 

No it's not...that's not what that means. Stfu.  Doesn't make you interesting or different or...

Anything really. 

[graybrown bird]

Lately my ongoing peeve is the lack of rain here -- for months.  Now that it's finally going to freeze overnight, it means I have to drag the hose around and try to water the shrubs and trees at least once before winter sets in.  So sad for all the folks in the southeast who are dealing with hurricanes and floods of rain -- their troubles go beyond peeves into tragedy -- but if only a fraction of that rain could have fallen here!

[tearknee]

On 10/13/2024 at 7:25 AM, DrSpaceman73 said:

Adding this to my list 

People who use the phrase 'my toxic trait' and them list some minor personal anecdote that is meaningless. 

'My toxic trait is i love chocolate!  '

 

No it's not...that's not what that means. Stfu.  Doesn't make you interesting or different or...

Anything really. 

Never mind that what is toxic is subjective...

 

For me, remakes of classic decades-old films that never get near the mark.

(and with regard to another failed King remake, Emily Perkins remains the only true Bev Marsh).

Edited October 15 by tearknee

[annzeepark914]

The ads here are once again taking over pages so that it's hard to read posts. The McDonald's ad is the worst. 🤬

[Dimity]

Just now, annzeepark914 said:

The ads here are once again taking over pages so that it's hard to read posts. The McDonald's ad is the worst. 🤬

I have that problem when I use my Amazon Fire.  There is one that is a like a big black steering wheel (something like that) and it will completely cover the screen and instructs me to rotate.  I have no idea what it expects me to do - rotate what? - but what I end up doing is closing the window completely.  I don't even try to post from that device as it's just a lesson in frustration thanks to the ads.