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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


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Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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21 minutes ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

Understands

 

 

When I was younger I thought that movie was really funny.  Now the whole thing seems sad

 

Still one of my favorite movies though 

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8 minutes ago, rcc said:

Dr told me stop caffeine and without it no more hot flashes. Never had night sweats.

I had to quit coffee because of my BP. Still got hot flashes.

Quote

ETA: I did sometimes feel a little sweaty in the middle of the night, but my BF is a damn furnace sometimes, so who knows? Still, it was never unbearable or anything.

My husband is a furnace too! It's nice in the winter but in the summer, yikes.

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15 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Hell, I went through menopause ten years ago and I got hot flashes, night sweats, weird mood swings and mental fogginess. And here I am, ten years later and I still get hot flashes. WTH?

Same 🤨😓

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Just now, kristen111 said:

 

@theredhead77 .. thank you for the list.  I eat everything on that list except maybe one thing, maybe a bean of some sort.  I do make fresh veggies too.  My sister is a vitamin freak and takes about 100 a day, no exaggeration, and wants me to take some of them.  I can’t take any vitamin as they all make me feel sick.  I’ve tried.  Once in awhile, I’ll eat a little steak, or a hamburger, and beef stew.  Very little tho.  Like a child would eat.  I have to cook well as I have two men in the house. Lol.  Guess I’m just fragile being a Gemini.  Recently, my Surgeon said I’m very strong in body. He gave me a strength test.  Guess it’s just women problems.

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9 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

I had to quit coffee because of my BP. Still got hot flashes.

My husband is a furnace too! It's nice in the winter but in the summer, yikes.

I have been drinking decaf Donut Shop coffee since I’m 45.  Try it.  Delicious.  Since my spine surgery six months ago, I’ve lost a lot of weight. My blood pressure went all the way down.  Who knew?  Also my cholesterol went to 173.  First time ever.  If only my PMS would disappear.  I never knew coffee raises BP.

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29 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

I had to quit coffee because of my BP. Still got hot flashes.

My husband is a furnace too! It's nice in the winter but in the summer, yikes.

Mine was too.

10 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

I have been drinking decaf Donut Shop coffee since I’m 45.  Try it.  Delicious.  Since my spine surgery six months ago, I’ve lost a lot of weight. My blood pressure went all the way down.  Who knew?  Also my cholesterol went to 173.  First time ever.  If only my PMS would disappear.  I never knew coffee raises BP.

That's my favorite coffee too. Do not need caffeine to taste good. 

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42 minutes ago, rcc said:

Dr told me stop caffeine and without it no more hot flashes. Never had night sweats.

I really think there is something to Ayurvedic medicine. If recommend anyone struggling with hot flashes to look into Ayurvedic advice. One tip is to avoid caffeine. 

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31 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

I have been drinking decaf Donut Shop coffee since I’m 45.  Try it.  Delicious.  Since my spine surgery six months ago, I’ve lost a lot of weight. My blood pressure went all the way down.  Who knew?  Also my cholesterol went to 173.  First time ever.  If only my PMS would disappear.  I never knew coffee raises BP.

I drink decaffeinated tea.

image.png.cc8c9929de09cc3545744cac6e3da615.png 

 

It

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I never had any of the menopause symptoms that so many women report.  I'd never heard of any connection to eating meat before.  I've been almost completely vegetarian for many years (I eat fish/seafood occasionally) 

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1 hour ago, Suzn said:

I never had any of the menopause symptoms that so many women report.  I'd never heard of any connection to eating meat before.  I've been almost completely vegetarian for many years (I eat fish/seafood occasionally) 

What made me think of it is that apparently there is no word for "hot flashes" in Japanese.

Again, this is purely speculation on my part.   But there are good reasons not to eat a lot of meat.

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I guess I'm the exception that proves the rule.  I don't eat a lot of red meat, though I'm not a vegetarian by any stretch, and I haven't had a caffeinated beverage in decades. I mostly drink water and occasionally a non-caffeinated beverage like Sprite.  I've had hot flashes for the past four years, and I can't detect any pattern or connection to diet or anything.  I just randomly burst into flames at irregular intervals throughout the day and night.

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2 hours ago, Browncoat said:

I guess I'm the exception that proves the rule.  I don't eat a lot of red meat, though I'm not a vegetarian by any stretch, and I haven't had a caffeinated beverage in decades. I mostly drink water and occasionally a non-caffeinated beverage like Sprite.  I've had hot flashes for the past four years, and I can't detect any pattern or connection to diet or anything.  I just randomly burst into flames at irregular intervals throughout the day and night.

Maybe TattleTeeny is onto something with dairy thing. I eat a lot of dairy, in fact if I ever turned to be lactose intolerant, I would be seriously bummed.

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If the government and the pharmaceutical industry put even half as much interest toward understanding what happens to people who menstruate, including what happens when we go through menopause, as they do toward any given issue that affects cisgender men, we'd have an appropriate amount of scientific evidence to draw upon in best handling our individual symptoms rather than grasping at connections that often fail the fundamental "correlation does not imply causation" principle.  Things have improved socially, in terms of the conversations we're comfortable openly having with each other and those in our families, but we're still having to rely too much on each other and the resulting anecdotal evidence that should be a supplement.

And, while I will of course deal with them in other ways, I would have nothing to do on an intimate personal level with a man who got the vapors at my saying I have menstrual cramps as if that's on an entirely different universe than my saying I have a headache.  Or who couldn't manage to pick up a box of tampons at the store.  Grow the hell up, preferably, but at least get the hell away from me if you won't. 

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10 hours ago, Bastet said:

And, while I will of course deal with them in other ways, I would have nothing to do on an intimate personal level with a man who got the vapors at my saying I have menstrual cramps as if that's on an entirely different universe than my saying I have a headache.  Or who couldn't manage to pick up a box of tampons at the store.  Grow the hell up, preferably, but at least get the hell away from me if you won't.

I decided decades ago to not date someone who is ikked by periods or refused to pick up care products. 

I acknowledge that everyone is the hero and the star of their own story but the sooner people acknowledge their cashier (even if it's their 'normal' person) doesn't remember what they bought as soon as they walk away, the better. People don't remember what a random person has in their cart past the interaction. No one is that memorable. 

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4 minutes ago, theredhead77 said:

I acknowledge that everyone is the hero and the star of their own story but the sooner people acknowledge their cashier (even if it's their 'normal' person) doesn't remember what they bought as soon as they walk away, the better. People don't remember what a random person has in their cart past the interaction. No one is that memorable. 

Heck, after my friends and I exchange Wordle scores in the morning, I couldn’t tell you later what the Wordle that day was! So the chances of cashiers remembering specific items after checking people out all day, is slim.

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I hate meetings where it seems like you don’t get anything done, both at work and away from it. Just got back from a church meeting and it felt like everyone was just going in circles talking about logistics of service projects but no dates or goals were actually set, and when someone did try to get the meeting back on track, everyone just veered off again and broke into their own conversations about the what if and what date and this and that. At one point someone said we should talk to the priest and have a meeting to see if he approves of us doing such and such task. He did approve of it…three years ago. And here we are still talking about it. And no he does not have time for another meeting on his schedule (he’s in charge of two churches because our diocese has a shortage of priests) so we need to pick a date and do it.

I get wanting to discuss the logistics of things and not saying these conversations are unimportant but you can’t spend the whole hour to the point where people are getting up to leave discussing them and getting off track either. I feel like there has to be a point where you need to say “we will do XYZ” and move to the next item on the agenda. Too many chiefs, as they say. 

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Meetings in general! Especially needing your camera on. If I have to put on work clothes and makeup (spare me saying I don't HAVE to), I might as well just be in the office that day. 

I've had a lot of pointless Teams meetings. It's like people think just because there is this technology available, that we must use it. I beg to differ. 

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Sunday nights where the weekend grinds down.  Anxiety already creeps up now for the week ahead.

 

Im trying to watch Austin Powers 3 now to take my mind a little off the work week but it’s not working.  I’ve felt this feeling many a Sunday night 

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4 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

Meetings in general! Especially needing your camera on. If I have to put on work clothes and makeup (spare me saying I don't HAVE to), I might as well just be in the office that day. 

I've had a lot of pointless Teams meetings. It's like people think just because there is this technology available, that we must use it. I beg to differ. 

Huh. That’s been the case since the pandemic and  we were working remotely. I feel fortunate that my firm has let us keep a hybrid schedule (I only go in two days a week; maybe more if a firm event takes place on a day that isn’t my day to go in) since last year. But meetings are still via Teams since we transitioned from Zoom. But it’s a mixture of in-person and Teams. However, when I’m at home on the meeting days, I never have the camera on. I have a profile picture of Raymond Burr from Classic Perry Mason* and it’s okay. Others also keep their cameras off and all we see are the first letters of their first name. Another reason is because my chair at home doesn’t align with my desk so unless I sit on two pillows, my face doesn’t show up at the right height. Plus it’s uncomfortable.

Sorry you have to keep your camera on. I do share your frustration because for certain firm meetings, not my practice groups, they do ask us to turn on the camera and those times, I do.

*Amuses the attorneys I work for because they know Perry is my hero. Others tease me, but tell me they also loved the show and Burr.😂😁😄

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E-Reader peeve.  I bought a book for my kindle last month but only got around to reading it today.  Well let's just say whoever did the proof reading needs to take a refresher course!  It is really pretty bad.  Words running together "thelilies were bloomingand" kind of thing, missing punctuation and other glitches.  I owned this book years ago when it first came out so I know this is NOT how it was originally published. 

Let my mistake be a cautionary tale for others - there is a window of time, at least with a kindle, where you can return an ebook.  But that window of time is not a month.  Check your purchase as soon as you get it if you think there is any chance the quality of your copy might be an issue!

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21 minutes ago, Elizabeth Anne said:

E-Reader peeve.  I bought a book for my kindle last month but only got around to reading it today.  Well let's just say whoever did the proof reading needs to take a refresher course!  It is really pretty bad.  Words running together "thelilies were bloomingand" kind of thing, missing punctuation and other glitches.  I owned this book years ago when it first came out so I know this is NOT how it was originally published. 

Let my mistake be a cautionary tale for others - there is a window of time, at least with a kindle, where you can return an ebook.  But that window of time is not a month.  Check your purchase as soon as you get it if you think there is any chance the quality of your copy might be an issue!

I seem to see that a lot with kindle books.  I have to wonder if it's some kind of software glitch that happens when they translate the text to  whatever Kindle is based on.  I used to scan magazine texts sometimes for one of my jobs and it never came out perfectly.

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12 hours ago, Elizabeth Anne said:

E-Reader peeve.  I bought a book for my kindle last month but only got around to reading it today.  Well let's just say whoever did the proof reading needs to take a refresher course!  It is really pretty bad.  Words running together "thelilies were bloomingand" kind of thing, missing punctuation and other glitches.  I owned this book years ago when it first came out so I know this is NOT how it was originally published. 

Let my mistake be a cautionary tale for others - there is a window of time, at least with a kindle, where you can return an ebook.  But that window of time is not a month.  Check your purchase as soon as you get it if you think there is any chance the quality of your copy might be an issue!

 

11 hours ago, roseha said:

I seem to see that a lot with kindle books.  I have to wonder if it's some kind of software glitch that happens when they translate the text to  whatever Kindle is based on.  I used to scan magazine texts sometimes for one of my jobs and it never came out perfectly.

Oh yeah, it’s a glitch when it gets converted. I remember when reading Nora Roberts’s Carnal Innocence when it first became available that there was a scene where Della is telling Josie not to tart yourself up” was printed asTar! I reported it to the publisher. And I think it was corrected in one of the “upgrade available” because the last time I re-read it a couple of months ago, the correct phrase was there.

And yes, you have two weeks to return an e-book to get a refund.

Edited by GHScorpiosRule
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I buy clothes from a local eco-friendly brand that does regular virtual launches where they use “normal people” models of all sizes.  The (mostly) women who attend the virtual chats are obsessed fans who seem to believe the brand could do no wrong.  Omg, they think everything made by that brand looks good on everyone !  I recently bought a pair of pants that felt a bit too roomy, but they kept on telling me I looked fine after I posted a picture.  I love the brand, but their recent seasons have been sized really generously and they (as in the people who run it) don’t seem to understand.  The fans are worse!!  

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13 hours ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

 

Oh yeah, it’s a glitch when it gets converted. I remember when reading Nora Roberta’s Carnal Innocence when it first became available that there was a scene where Della is telling Josie not to tart yourself up” was printed asTar! I reported it to the publisher. And I think it was corrected in one of the “upgrade available” because the last time I re-read it a couple of months ago, the correct phrase was there.

And yes, you have two weeks to return an e-book to get a refund.

I was reading something on my Kindle yesterday and in certain words, there were various 3-digit numbers in the middle -- like "instruc239tion." I didn't make a mental list of what the words were, but I am wondering if it's some font ligature issue (which still doesn't explain why numbers and not just some symbol).

I’m sorry to talk about my foot again, but oh my god, it’s almost more annoying that I have no pain (and no bruising) at all. At least if I had pain, I would probably not want to walk on it. I have a doctor appointment Friday; I pray at the very least, even if I still have to keep this garbage boot, that I can put weight on my foot again. This is fucking insane. (Also, having a non-weight-bearing foot and working at home has proved to be way more isolating than even the early days of COVID.)

 

Edited by TattleTeeny
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Good luck with your appointment @TattleTeeny!

I remember that I posted here about my credit card being hacked and having to change all kinds of recurring payments.  Now another one has been hacked!  I swear I am a careful person.  I have to go to my records now and see what card I am charging my prescriptions to.  Among other things . Can't believe this.

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Thank you! Send vibes or whatever, everyone, I beg of you!

Ugh, figuring out credit card stuff sucks, man. I had to do the same a while back, but then I set up all of the precautions I possibly could (2- or 3-point verification, PW updates every X number of months, all of it) and have been OK since. Maybe a coincidence but at least I feel like I did what I could. 

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10 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Bleh! Did anybody else watch the MTV Awards last night? Talk about a mess. Why did they even bother televising it? No one was there and it was just highlights from previous years.

Speaking of TV, what's the deal with CNN's decades series?  The 2010s already???!!!  

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3 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

Bleh! Did anybody else watch the MTV Awards last night? Talk about a mess. Why did they even bother televising it? No one was there and it was just highlights from previous years.

And it seemed just about EVERY cable channel was broadcasting it, then repeating it after. Are people really clamoring for this? Are these considered awards people are excited about competing for?
I know Drew Barrymore pulled out as host because of the writer’s strike and I’m sure it went downhill from there. 

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2 minutes ago, chitowngirl said:

And it seemed just about EVERY cable channel was broadcasting it, then repeating it after. Are people really clamoring for this? Are these considered awards people are excited about competing for?
I know Drew Barrymore pulled out as host because of the writer’s strike and I’m sure it went downhill from there. 

It was awful. There were no performances, no acceptance speeches except Zoom ones and it was all commercials.

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(edited)

My BF is pretty great all around, but why, why, WHY must he frequently assume that I like things to be a certain way because I am "particular"? OK, sure, for some things in life, I am particular (like anyone else), but as a person who is in our home far more than he is (he is basically his own employee in a small business) and thus know more about how shit goes down here on a day-to-day basis, I may just have actual evidence-based reasons for some things -- for instance, leaving the downstairs bathroom door open = one of the cats wants to play in the trashcan or under the sink, and putting something that I use every day on a super-high shelf = I have a problem getting to it when I need it. 

ETA: "Particular" sounds kind of judgmental to me. I don't know if he means it this way, but it sounds almost like a tactful way to say bossy or, worse, controlling. I am not some...household harridan, I swear. Also, I don't believe he'd be the BF of a household harridan anyway! 

Edited by TattleTeeny
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4 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

I may just have actual evidence-based reasons for some things

Heh.

My ex-wife has never fully accepted that I moved things around in the dishwasher after she put them in there. It was simply because I was going to be the one who unloaded it. If all the stuff that was going into cabinet A was next to each other on the same shelf of the dishwasher, it was easier for me to grab all of those things and put them away than it would be if one thing was in the back, one in the front and two on the bottom. 

I had a perfectly logical reason for being particular. It is unfortunate that emotions had to get involved.

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14 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

ETA: "Particular" sounds kind of judgmental to me. I don't know if he means it this way, but it sounds almost like a tactful way to say bossy or, worse, controlling.

Yes, in this context, it's used in a dismissive way -- you only care about Thing because you're persnickety, not because it's a valid issue any number of reasonable people in the same situation might have.  Synonyms for this definition of "particular" include positives like fastidious, meticulous, and selective, but it's more commonly associated in the usage you're talking about with those like finicky and fussy.  And it's not a coincidence this, when a criticism, is more frequently leveled at women, especially by men.

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On 3/19/2023 at 1:46 PM, roseha said:

Yes I wonder what it's like for young people who may not know what to believe anymore.   For what it's worth, I just noticed that the New York Times, which I read online, has dropped the byline "All the News that's Fit to Print".

When did that happen??

I have the paper of last Sunday, May 7, and that tagline is still there.

nytmay72023.thumb.jpg.dca8686bab306064f589e82a09fa3bb7.jpg

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22 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

My BF is pretty great all around, but why, why, WHY must he frequently assume that I like things to be a certain way because I am "particular"?

I'll see your "particular" and raise you a "you look mad". In context: Yesterday when I arrived home and was walking down the sidewalk to our house, I was deep in thought about some work issues and going through the list of things I need to get done before this weekend. Unbeknownst to me my husband was looking out the window watching me. When I got into the house he said to me "you look mad." I told him the above, that I was deep in thought. He dismissed that with "If I didn't know you I'd be scared of you." I laughed and said again that I was just thinking about all the stuff I had do. He AGAIN mentioned my 'mad face' and I kind of snapped and said, well so be it, I can't help it and since you won't believe me when I say I was deep in thought now you HAVE MADE ME MAD. Ugh.

He did apologize and the evening went fine but my thought is, why say anything at all? Why not ask "Hey, is everything ok?" instead of going to what was essentially saying I had a resting bitch face?

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11 hours ago, Bastet said:

Yes, in this context, it's used in a dismissive way -- you only care about Thing because you're persnickety, not because it's a valid issue any number of reasonable people in the same situation might have.  Synonyms for this definition of "particular" include positives like fastidious, meticulous, and selective, but it's more commonly associated in the usage you're talking about with those like finicky and fussy.  And it's not a coincidence this, when a criticism, is more frequently leveled at women, especially by men.

Also! I do not believe that it's finicky to care whether things are put away where they were before they were used! Do some people really not care if they can't find it again? Current BF doesn't do this* (well, he gets it almost right and I choose not to care about a few inches to the left or right or whatever; that may be a bit "particular"), but others have. 

*Actually, he has a couple of times with clean dishes in the dish rack, but he was not the one who'd taken them out, and possibly had no idea we even had such a dish. Luckily, I am usually able to guess where he'd think it came from and why.

Edited by TattleTeeny
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