Small Talk: About Big People

[Janevain]

I agree, cherenkov, but I also think it largely depends on the doctor. Do they treat the weight and its consequences as a statement of fact, or more like the moral failings of an idiot? I have been talked to kindly and matter-of-factly about my weight by some doctors. I appreciate that and it definitely serves as a reminder and motivation to get back on track.

By others, I have been lectured using words and tones like I am unintelligent, or they ignored the weight I HAD lost (apparently 25 lbs in 6 months was not enough to avoid a lecture, though I was there for strep throat), or lectured me about a recent weight gain-- literally 2 weeks after I'd given birth, as compared with my pre-pregnancy weight.

I also have had the hardest time being diagnosed with actual diseases because, since I am fat, all symptoms must only be a result of fatness and will magically go away once the excess weight is gone. 

So while I was never one to avoid going to the doctor altogether, I certainly did change doctors a few times. 

[Ketzel]

When I was 18, ahemmumble years ago, I went to a women's clinic for birth control pills. These still being the days when brides wore modest white to signify their purity, the clinic (which was entirely staffed by middle-aged male doctors) was not all that welcoming to a single woman seeking birth control. I was asked multiple times if I was still a virgin, if I had plans to marry in the near future and if my father was aware that I intended to have pre-marital sexual intercourse.  I was lectured on the need to be a virgin if I ever intended to marry a "good" man. I was informed by the youngest "hippest" doctor that "sex was like eating ice cream." Once I started, I wouldn't be able to stop, every man I met would expect sex from me and I would end up alone, shamed and riddled with sexually transmitted diseases. And in the event the birth control pills failed, I would also end up a disgraced mother of a bastard child. When I refused to back down, they refused to write a prescription for more than one month at a time, which meant I would have to go to the clinic every month in order to get a renewal. I was informed that each renewal would require a comprehensive pelvic exam and blood tests for STDs. 

I bow to no one with regard to the experience of being bullied and condescended to by doctors.  And since the attitude of those doctors was by far the norm, not the exception in those days, and women gynecologists were few and far between, there was not much I could do about it.  [In the end, it was one of the druggists who inadvertently came to my rescue. When I presented the 30 day prescription, he was so irritated at the extra work he'd have to do with monthly renewals that he called the doctor and the doctor agreed to extend the prescription for six months, as long as I agreed to still come in for monthly check-ups. I took the prescription and found another doctor who, while not any warmer to the idea of single women buying birth control, was OK with half yearly checkups, largely on the grounds that any unmarried woman who wanted birth control was already a slut, so monthly checkups weren't worth his time.]

The medical profession is not one that changes its attitudes and approaches on the human level with any great speed. It took decades of activism, more women fighting their way into the profession, changes in the law, and vast changes in society's attitude towards women's sexuality, autonomy,  and civil rights, and there's still work to be done.  If overweight people feel strongly enough that the medical community as a whole is disrespectful and condescending, they too have a lot of work to do. But when any given individual can avoid the whole issue by losing weight,  which most people would consider a desirable result, it's harder to make a case that the medical profession as a whole needs to stop using weight as a health metric.

Edited March 1, 2019 by Ketzel

[minamreeka]

I've spent about 20 years of my life in the USA and about 15 years abroad in various countries.  I'm also an asthmatic and a klutz, so I've been in the emergency room in 14 countries for asthma related complications or for sprained ankles from falling in a whole in the street (seriously I've done that multiple times).   It's shocking how much weight shaming happens in the American medical profession.

I have no objection to getting my weight checked when necessary.  But when you go to the doctor for strep throat or a sprained wrist, there's no reason for that.  Most of the world doesn't check your weight when you go to the doctor for that.  It's really a bizarre thing that just doesn't happen other places.  I've just never had that happen anywhere else.

When weight does come up in other places I've found doctors don't shame you for it but state it as a fact.  They may say "You have a high bmi.  This could cause a complication for surgery."  But it's stated as a fact.  There is no condescending tone with it and there is no lecture on weight loss.  I know when I'm being shamed and when I'm not and I've only ever had doctors shame me in the USA.

This kind of stuff does keep fat people, women especially, from seeing doctors.  Especially since most fat people have been bullied at some point due to their weight, people will avoid whatever will bring that kind of treatment again.  I feel the medical profession needs to have a 2 part rule of just weighing patients when it's related to the treatment sought or issue presented and then discussing weight in a factual manner and not as disapproval.  

[Dot]

Boy, @Ketzel, do I ever remember those "good ol' days!" But I'll call your "unmarried slut" and raise you a lesbian in terms of existence in those days.

[Ketzel]

2 hours ago, Dot said:

Boy, @Ketzel, do I ever remember those "good ol' days!" But I'll call your "unmarried slut" and raise you a lesbian in terms of existence in those days.

Don't be silly, Dot. Lesbians didn't even exist in those days. [sarcastifont off]

Edited March 1, 2019 by Ketzel

[kar328]

As a nurse in an OBGYN office, part of the rooming routine is the weight and blood pressure. Some places even do measure your height (I lost half an inch one year, and grew it back the next). It's for your BMI to be calculated and I agree 100% that it doesn't need to be done at every single visit. I LOVE when patients refuse it but that's pretty rare. I weigh myself often, and naked, so when I go for my physical I threaten to strip down if they don't use the number I saw on the scale that morning. I admire the people who hop on wearing boots and sweaters and don't give a $%&^, but my lifelong weight issues won't let me do that. Yet. I had a recent patient who started stripping off all her jewelry and said "you're laughing at me" and I said, "nope, I love it." We bonded. 

But everyone should know, that as a mentally competent adult, you have the right to refuse any and all medical treatments, etc and that includes weight. There are times when it's necessary to know, some medications are calculated based on weight, a lot of office equipment like exam tables have weight limits, and doing OB, we do track the pregnant women's weights to make sure they're gaining and not too much because it can lead to complications with the labor and delivery. 

[SunnyBeBe]

I haven't had any doctor or nurse get on me about weight before.  Some of these stories are horrendous. I'm not sure how I would handle it. I think I might try to find more enlightened and compassionate care though. 

I was recently sitting in the doctor's office for a UTI (omg) and read an article on patient's rights and how you are not obligated to get weighed every time. I see my Endocrinologist (I'm a Type I diabetic) several times a year for routine care and my own primary a couple of times per year, so, I feel like I'm getting weighed a lot. It does sort of keep me aware though, so, I'm watching to try to not gain.  I still have a little more to lose, but, I really don't want to gain any. 

[Colleenna]

6 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I haven't had any doctor or nurse get on me about weight before.  Some of these stories are horrendous. I'm not sure how I would handle it. I think I might try to find more enlightened and compassionate care though. 

I was recently sitting in the doctor's office for a UTI (omg) and read an article on patient's rights and how you are not obligated to get weighed every time. I see my Endocrinologist (I'm a Type I diabetic) several times a year for routine care and my own primary a couple of times per year, so, I feel like I'm getting weighed a lot. It does sort of keep me aware though, so, I'm watching to try to not gain.  I still have a little more to lose, but, I really don't want to gain any. 

I insist on being treated like the intelligent, educated woman that I am. I have no problem with the doctor saying "you need to lose x pounds," just as I had no problem with the doctor saying "you need to stop smoking." (I used to smoke). I had a long-term doctor who treated me the way I expressed my expectations of being treated (unfortunately, Medicare came between us  ). I remember one visit when I had gained a lot of weight and he mentioned it, I teased him that it was his fault, "because you made me quit smoking." "Well, now you need to work on your weight." 

[Pachengala]

10 hours ago, Ketzel said:

When I was 18, ahemmumble years ago, I went to a women's clinic for birth control pills. These still being the days when brides wore modest white to signify their purity, the clinic (which was entirely staffed by middle-aged male doctors) was not all that welcoming to a single woman seeking birth control. I was asked multiple times if I was still a virgin, if I had plans to marry in the near future and if my father was aware that I intended to have pre-marital sexual intercourse.  I was lectured on the need to be a virgin if I ever intended to marry a "good" man. I was informed by the youngest "hippest" doctor that "sex was like eating ice cream." Once I started, I wouldn't be able to stop, every man I met would expect sex from me and I would end up alone, shamed and riddled with sexually transmitted diseases. And in the event the birth control pills failed, I would also end up a disgraced mother of a bastard child. When I refused to back down, they refused to write a prescription for more than one month at a time, which meant I would have to go to the clinic every month in order to get a renewal. I was informed that each renewal would require a comprehensive pelvic exam and blood tests for STDs. 

I bow to no one with regard to the experience of being bullied and condescended to by doctors.  And since the attitude of those doctors was by far the norm, not the exception in those days, and women gynecologists were few and far between, there was not much I could do about it.

GIRL. Jesus! That’s positively medieval! Here in Oregon we don’t even have to see a doctor to get birth control and it really is thanks to y’all for fighting back. 

6 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I was recently sitting in the doctor's office for a UTI (omg) and read an article on patient's rights and how you are not obligated to get weighed every time. 

I am super, super prickly about my person and how the world feels entitled to it so I will frequently decline to be weighed. I’m a normal BMI and weigh myself weekly and my brilliant, fabulous PA knows I’ll let her know if there’s a change. I will occasionally get weighed, if I just don’t care that day, but by and large I don’t want anybody doing anything with my body that I don’t explicitly feel happy and healthy about, be it my doctor, TSA, or a family member. My friends mimic me waving their hands in front of their bodies and shouting ‘This is MY person!’ because I’m so particular about it. 

Sorry, the wine made that long. Basically you have the right to decline ANYTHING your doctor requests. It’s YOUR person!

[Mothra]

On 3/1/2019 at 1:08 PM, minamreeka said:

This kind of stuff does keep fat people, women especially, from seeing doctors.  Especially since most fat people have been bullied at some point due to their weight, people will avoid whatever will bring that kind of treatment again.  I feel the medical profession needs to have a 2 part rule of just weighing patients when it's related to the treatment sought or issue presented and then discussing weight in a factual manner and not as disapproval.  

While I certainly agree with people who have posted that there's no harm and certainly a benefit to being reminded at every doctor visit that you are overweight because you should be losing weight, the fact remains that weight loss is not something doctors--even doctors who specialize in weight loss--have managed to figure out.

Look.  No one wants to be fat, and no fat person I know refuses to believe he/she is fat.  Being told at every fucking visit--as someone upthread said, even for a strep throat--that you need to lose weight when doctors have no real help to offer in weight loss is frustrating and humiliating.

If it were simply a matter of following a low-calorie diet--which I agree; it is--no one would be fat.  But not everyone can control what and how much they eat, and we, including and perhaps especially the medical profession, don't know why that is.  I lost over 100 lbs seven years ago--on my own--and have kept it off, and I don't know why I was able to do it then, when I wasn't able to do it before.  Sure, I ate less food, but where did that self-control suddenly come from?  If I could bottle it, I'd be a zillionaire.

In the meantime, I think it's more important for overweight people to feel comfortable going to the doctor when they need to, not delaying getting medical help because they don't want to be weighed or lectured.  Overweight people are subject to more serious medical issues than average-weight people, and I think they probably need more medical care than average-size people.  But in my experience fat people are reluctant to go to the doctor, and that's just wrong.

Overweight people who are comfortable going to the doctor, knowing that they aren't going to be given shit about their weight, are also imo more open to hearing what the doctor may say about weight loss.  And, as an aside, when I was fat I refused to be weighed at every doctor visit, and there was no problem with that.  If there are fat people here who are avoiding going to the doctor, you might want to try that.

Obligatory disclaimer:  of course I'm not talking about sudden unexplained weight gain or loss, or about medications that have to be prescribed by weight, or anything that has directly to do with weight.

[auntjess]

This is totally off topic, but not sure where to ask anymore.
I'd like to discuss a show, Engineering Catastrophes, but don't know if genre file/forum whatever still exists, or what and where one would go to start a file.
Any suggestions appreciated.  Thanks.

[Colleenna]

Anyone else on here watch "Family By the Ton?" I just watched a piece of an episode (home sick with RSV). Is it worth watching? 

[auntjess]

3 minutes ago, Colleenna said:

Anyone else on here watch "Family By the Ton?" I just watched a piece of an episode (home sick with RSV). Is it worth watching? 

I watch it, and like it better now that they're back to last year's family again, but last year was better, maybe because there's been a lot of backsliding.

[auntjess]

FYI:
The Women with the World's Biggest Hips, is on Discovery Life?(the one that's 466 on U-Verse) at 4AM tomorrow, 3/17.
(It was on once earlier, but I forgot to post it.

[Colleenna]

9 hours ago, auntjess said:

FYI:
The Women with the World's Biggest Hips, is on Discovery Life?(the one that's 466 on U-Verse) at 4AM tomorrow, 3/17.
(It was on once earlier, but I forgot to post it.

Whitney makes a guest appearance?

[auntjess]

15 hours ago, Colleenna said:

Whitney makes a guest appearance?

She could invite one of the to BGDC, for a twerk-off.

[SunnyBeBe]

Does anyone know the REAL health risks of allowing cats on your kitchen counter and dining table?  I know quite a few people who allow this, IRL.  I know that Whit does as well.  I'm trying to decide if it's just me or is it not sanitary.  The people that I know who do it, seem normal and hygiene conscious people, but, when it comes to their cats, it all goes out the window.  This is my concern:  The cat uses the litter box and stands in or near the poop. He leaves the box and then jumps on your counter.  So, aren't the poop germs on his feet now on the counter?  Just asking?

[sixlets]

2 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Does anyone know the REAL health risks of allowing cats on your kitchen counter and dining table?  I know quite a few people who allow this, IRL.  I know that Whit does as well.  I'm trying to decide if it's just me or is it not sanitary.  The people that I know who do it, seem normal and hygiene conscious people, but, when it comes to their cats, it all goes out the window.  This is my concern:  The cat uses the litter box and stands in or near the poop. He leaves the box and then jumps on your counter.  So, aren't the poop germs on his feet now on the counter?  Just asking?

Mr. Six & I own 3 cats.  They have free reign of our 3-story house with two exceptions-one is the 3rd bedroom (where we keep their food) and the kitchen counter.  We are nowhere near germophobes, but the idea of them on that counter is repulsive to me.  Our Maine Coone has never been physically able to jump up that high, but the other two are very capable.  They may not be the smartest critters, but they all know they are not allowed to be up there.  Then again, cats on the kitchen counter are the least of Twit's issues.

[Nicmar]

21 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Does anyone know the REAL health risks of allowing cats on your kitchen counter and dining table?  I know quite a few people who allow this, IRL.  I know that Whit does as well.  I'm trying to decide if it's just me or is it not sanitary.  The people that I know who do it, seem normal and hygiene conscious people, but, when it comes to their cats, it all goes out the window.  This is my concern:  The cat uses the litter box and stands in or near the poop. He leaves the box and then jumps on your counter.  So, aren't the poop germs on his feet now on the counter?  Just asking?

Yes it is. When I'm home i see my cats on countertop and i get pissed and shoo them off. I also go through about a bottle of disinfectant cleaner. I always wipe my counters down.

18 hours ago, sixlets said:

Mr. Six & I own 3 cats.  They have free reign of our 3-story house with two exceptions-one is the 3rd bedroom (where we keep their food) and the kitchen counter.  We are nowhere near germophobes, but the idea of them on that counter is repulsive to me.  Our Maine Coone has never been physically able to jump up that high, but the other two are very capable.  They may not be the smartest critters, but they all know they are not allowed to be up there.  Then again, cats on the kitchen counter are the least of Twit's issues.

I bet your Maine Coon is gorgeous!!! I always wanted one.

[TurtlePower]

On 3/20/2019 at 11:36 AM, SunnyBeBe said:

Does anyone know the REAL health risks of allowing cats on your kitchen counter and dining table?  I know quite a few people who allow this, IRL.  I know that Whit does as well.  I'm trying to decide if it's just me or is it not sanitary.  The people that I know who do it, seem normal and hygiene conscious people, but, when it comes to their cats, it all goes out the window.  This is my concern:  The cat uses the litter box and stands in or near the poop. He leaves the box and then jumps on your counter.  So, aren't the poop germs on his feet now on the counter?  Just asking?

Yep. I call it "poo-paws". "Get your poo-paws OFF the counter!" 

[SunnyBeBe]

Thanks for clearing up the info about the poo paws.  I've had a couple of cats before, but, none of them ever jumped up on counter or dining table. I'm not sure why. They were pretty well behaved without much instruction from me.   I suspect that I put out a pretty serious vibe about germs, though.  I have been called a germaphobe before. lol   One who says that has a cat who is fed on the dining room table.....lol.  Seriously.  And, the other has a dog that is allowed to do anything it wants in her home.  I don't think the dog walks on this person's counters, but, he could if he wanted to.  lol 

[Finny]

Long time lurker, first time poster on this forum. I have to admit that I have not seen every episode of MFFL but I like to hang out here to read the comments. I'm learning a lot from posters about nutrition, exercise, their struggles and how they deal with weight issues etc. I don't condone body shaming no matter what that person looks like. Fat shaming is definitely an issue in our society, as is shaming anybody that does not meet the standard in looks that today's society puts on human beings especially on us women. When I have a problems with a person it is not their looks, it is their personality and the way they treat other people.

I myself struggle with losing weight now that I'm older (60). My take on very obese people is not the aesthetic one but the health aspect. I always wonder how they can carry that much weight around without serious health problems. I personally was never skinny, more like average size until I was in my early 40s. That's when my weight started creeping up until I was around 200lb in my 50s. I was never an athletic and sports enthusiast but I started a walking routine that helped keep my weight somewhat steady. Two years ago I injured my foot and started having problems with my ligaments. I had to stop my walking and didn't watch much how I ate and gained 40 pounds in 1 year and started having problems with my knees and lower back. When I had my check up again, my doctor read me the riot act because my lab report sucked. My weight was 240 lb (i'm 5'8), my cholesterol was 200+, my sugar was up, my A1C was almost at 6. She told me if I don't do anything I will be diabetic and that scared the crappola out of me and finally off the couch. She also told me that my foot is not an excuse and I need to go into the pool. So I hauled myself to our wellness center and signed up for pool classes and bought a scale. I have to admit that initially I felt uncomfortable because I hadn't worn a bathing suit in 10 years and was very self-conscious, but I was pleasantly surprised by the women/men that attended the classes. The gym has a very diverse clientele of any age, size, background etc. I started going to aqua bike, aqua fit classes almost every day. Recently I added weights and barre to my routine to switch things up. I lost 35 lb by just being active and if I would be more strict with watching what I eat it would be even more. My weight right now is 205lb. For my lab report I got a star from my Dr. 😄 because my cholesterol is 170, my HDL 75, my triglycerides are 75 and my A1C is 5.5. My back/knee pain is gone. 🙂 I would like to lose more weight to get below 200lb, that means I have gird my not so wee loins and really start looking at my food intake. For me to exercise on a regular basis was to find something that is fun and I look forward too, otherwise I find excuses not to go. What also helps me with my exercise is the awesome instructor I have. Her saying is: "gyms are not just for healthy people, they are mainly for people that want to get and stay healthy".

It is hard to lose weight. As many here can attest. It takes a lot of discipline (that I lack when it comes to food) but if many of you lovely posters can do it, I can do it too. 😄  I will never reach my ideal weight of 128lb for my height according to the charts. I never was that weight. My lowest was 145lb in my 20s. My Dr. told me not to pay attention to it. Ideal weight doesn't mean healthy. My 2 years younger sister is a good example. She never had to struggle with weight. She is still at 58 the same size she was when she was 20 and always was the skinny one in the family, but is now the one with the most health problems.

Anyway. I didn't meant for my post to get this long. I really enjoy reading the posts here and I look forward to more. I wish everybody much health and to work toward being in love with the person in the mirror who has been through so much and is still standing. 

And.... yikes to the cat posts. We have 6 cats - 3 indoor and 3 outdoor furries. None of them go on the counter or the table. At least not when we are home. No clue what they do when their staff is out. 🙂

[Dot]

@Finny, I love your comment about being your cats' "staff"! 😁 Ain't that the truth.

I also have 6, all rescues, all between the ages of 11-13, all indoor. Until a couple of weeks ago. I had 7. My big, beautiful Flora passed over the Rainbow Bridge & I am still grieving the loss.

You mentioned participating in "aqua bike." I have never heard of that. Could you give some details?

[Dot]

Hey, @Colleena. Tonight's episode of "The Simpsons" included an attempt to boycott Krusty the Clown becuz he changed Itchy & Scratchy into girls. Bart called it "not hate-watching" since he was not watching a show he would be hate-watching if he watched it.

I couldn't help but think of you. 😊

[Finny]

8 hours ago, Dot said:

@Finny, I love your comment about being your cats' "staff"! 😁 Ain't that the truth.

I also have 6, all rescues, all between the ages of 11-13, all indoor. Until a couple of weeks ago. I had 7. My big, beautiful Flora passed over the Rainbow Bridge & I am still grieving the loss.

You mentioned participating in "aqua bike." I have never heard of that. Could you give some details?

Aqua bike is like spin on land. My wellness center has special bikes that you put in the pool. There are different versions of bikes. With our bikes you strap your whole foot in. Another difference compare to land spin is you can work your arms and whole body. The resistance comes from the special pedals. The faster you paddle the more resistance the water provides. We do sprints, jumps, armwork, quad isolation etc, toward end of class we use the bike for pushups, and working abs etc. I love it. I go 3x per week. Two classes are @ 6 am. I'm no morning person but I faithfully get up at 5 am to hit the classes. Aqua bike is great for people with knee, back and tendon problems because of the water support. We also have people that are severely overweight and can't go on a reg. Bike. I can't go to spin class (I love biking) because it aggravates my foot tendons. I have no problem in aqua bike class. I can work up quite a sweat even in the water. I personally love it. Aqua bike was one of the reasons why I signed up with my wellness center. 

[Finny]

Dot, sorry to hear of the passing of your the baby. Sending you a cyber hug. I lost my 14 year old Casey to cancer 2 years ago and I still miss her. It is the same with all the other the babies I lost in the past. They are like family and provide much comfort and joy in our lives. Take comfort in the knowledge that she was loved and had a great live with you.

 I believe that animals are great teachers. we are a registered foster home with our county animal control. Besides our 6 furry teachers, I always learn something new with each foster. Right now I foster a mom cat with 3 kittens. She gave birth in our house 3 weeks ago. More cats/kittens for me to love 😁

[Gramto6]

Dot so sorry to hear of your loss. I know the sadness you feel. I lost my Boo 3 months ago and it is still hard sometimes. He was my buddy for 12.5 years. They are indeed family and are missed deeply when they leave us.

[Dot]

Thank you for the cyber hug, @Finny. I'm very impressed with your love o critters smaller & more helpless than us human beings.

And also impressed with your posts. I hope you'll keep it up!

Thanks also for the aqua bike details. . I have never heard of a gym offering that, but I would be so into it, even at 6 p.m. My greatest sorrow, in terms of exercise, is not being able to do my aqua exercises any more. (I can't climb up stairs, so I could get IN a pool but I wouldn't be able to get out again. There is a pool with a ramp about 20 miles away, but gym membership is very expensive.)

[Finny]

1 hour ago, Dot said:

Thank you for the cyber hug, @Finny. I'm very impressed with your love o critters smaller & more helpless than us human beings.

And also impressed with your posts. I hope you'll keep it up!

Thanks also for the aqua bike details. . I have never heard of a gym offering that, but I would be so into it, even at 6 p.m. My greatest sorrow, in terms of exercise, is not being able to do my aqua exercises any more. (I can't climb up stairs, so I could get IN a pool but I wouldn't be able to get out again. There is a pool with a ramp about 20 miles away, but gym membership is very expensive.)

TY for the compliment. I try to keep posting here and also in the different episode threads. 

I'm sorry to hear about your mobility issues. It stinks when you want to exercise but the gyms are not accommodating potential members either with equipment to make exercise possible or with an offer to reduce fees. My gym is not cheap either but I signed up when they had a special deal and I got my membership for 50% off. My monthly fee is $42 and that is acceptable for me considering what they offer. Have you checked with your insurance if they offer to help pay? I don't know if you are on Medicare yet, if yes I would check with them. Often Medicare Advance helps with gym membership fees from what I heard. We have a very obese young lady that has medical and mobility issues. She comes to the morning bike classes and aqua fit classes every so often. She uses a walker and it takes great effort on her part to get out of the pool but she has no problem being on the bike moving her legs that way. Sadly most gyms don't offer Aqua Bike. My gym is the only one in our city that does. 

I get a lot of joy out of fostering. Last year I had 60 fosters - Orphans, moms w. kittens, preg. cats, bottle babies and everything in between. It's a a lot of work, unless you have a good cat mom who does all the work. Orphans and especially bottle babies take the most time. You have to feed them, burp, clean, poop and pee them. Basically it's like you have infants in your house. Then of course you can always lose kittens. No matter what you do they just don't make them and that is heart breaking and I always cry my eyes out. Whenever that happens I console myself with the thought that at least they had love, warmth and caring in their short life and they didn't die alone somewhere out in the wild. Kitten season is just starting so I'm bracing myself for phone calls 😄

[Dot]

Yes, @Finny, I'm on Medicare -- been there for a while since I'm 80 yrs old. Even if there was a deal at the local gym thru Medicare, I just wouldn't want to face (what to me now has become) the long drive to & from. Esp. now, when my left leg is chronically in severe pain. I have an appt Apr 1 with a pain mgt doc & I'm keeping my fingers crossed that she will give me a cortizone shot to allieviate the pain.

[aliya]

On 3/1/2019 at 12:08 PM, minamreeka said:

I have no objection to getting my weight checked when necessary.  But when you go to the doctor for strep throat or a sprained wrist, there's no reason for that. 

I have to go to doctors several times a year for various things. I go to the various clinics in my uni's hospital and many of them want to take a weight. I tell them 'no.'  It's not a problem. The only time I've acquiesced was when they were doing pre-surgery testing and needed a weight to determine the amount of anesthesia, which I kinda thought was important.  

As a diabetic, I've certainly had doctors ask about my weight and encourage weight loss. I don't have a problem with that; I've never had anyone fat shame me, though. I did have someone try to shame me into a colonoscopy, when I suggested less invasive tests first (nothing was wrong, they were just on a fishing expedition because of my age). They must have forgotten who they were dealing with, 'cause I went right to the ombudsperson on that one. 

[Nicmar]

On 3/25/2019 at 6:48 AM, Finny said:

Dot, sorry to hear of the passing of your the baby. Sending you a cyber hug. I lost my 14 year old Casey to cancer 2 years ago and I still miss her. It is the same with all the other the babies I lost in the past. They are like family and provide much comfort and joy in our lives. Take comfort in the knowledge that she was loved and had a great live with you.

 I believe that animals are great teachers. we are a registered foster home with our county animal control. Besides our 6 furry teachers, I always learn something new with each foster. Right now I foster a mom cat with 3 kittens. She gave birth in our house 3 weeks ago. More cats/kittens for me to love 😁

Fostering is great and commend you for doing. I wish the people in our city would do that. We have such a high rate of homeless animals and they get put down. I lost my beloved Friday (Husky) 3 weeks ago, still overcoming his loss. 

[Finny]

2 hours ago, Nicmar said:

Fostering is great and commend you for doing. I wish the people in our city would do that. We have such a high rate of homeless animals and they get put down. I lost my beloved Friday (Husky) 3 weeks ago, still overcoming his loss. 

😞 so sorry about losing your beloved pet. It's hard to come home and not being greeted by your best friend. I can't imagine not having pets. My furries are my babies... spoiled babies. They bring a lot of joy into our life. They love you no matter what. 

I'm in NC and our county and others have volunteer and foster programs with Animal Control and also non-profit rescues. They work together. Sadly our county does not have a TNR program. That would help a great deal getting a handle on feral cats. The new director is working on changing that but politicians like the easy way out and just euthanize instead doing a TNR. A lot of times strays can be re-homed. During the winter months when there are no kittens, adults have a great chance for adoption. Matter of fact all adult cats that were put in Petsmart for adoption were adopted and a good number at Animal Control. When kitten season starts that number drops considerable. The shelter often has no choice but to euthanize animals since there is only a certain number of spaces avail. 😞 It's not just strays... plenty owners just drop off their animals when they become an inconvenience (moving, vacation etc.) it is really sad.

[Colleenna]

1 minute ago, Finny said:

😞 so sorry about losing your beloved pet. It's hard to come home and not being greeted by your best friend. I can't imagine not having pets. My furries are my babies... spoiled babies. They bring a lot of joy into our life. They love you no matter what. 

I'm in NC and our county and others have volunteer and foster programs with Animal Control and also non-profit rescues. They work together. Sadly our county does not have a TNR program. That would help a great deal getting a handle on feral cats. The new director is working on changing that but politicians like the easy way out and just euthanize instead doing a TNR. A lot of times strays can be re-homed. During the winter months when there are no kittens, adults have a great chance for adoption. Matter of fact all adult cats that were put in Petsmart for adoption were adopted and a good number at Animal Control. When kitten season starts that number drops considerable. The shelter often has no choice but to euthanize animals since there is only a certain number of spaces avail. 😞 It's not just strays... plenty owners just drop off their animals when they become an inconvenience (moving, vacation etc.) it is really sad.

My girlies are getting old (as am I ). They're 16. Most of my kitties have made it to 18/19. Because of my age, when I lose these girls I will adopt a senior cat. It wouldn't be fair to adopt a kitten that, in all likelihood, would outlive me and have to be rehomed. 

[Finny]

19 hours ago, Dot said:

Yes, @Finny, I'm on Medicare -- been there for a while since I'm 80 yrs old. Even if there was a deal at the local gym thru Medicare, I just wouldn't want to face (what to me now has become) the long drive to & from. Esp. now, when my left leg is chronically in severe pain. I have an appt Apr 1 with a pain mgt doc & I'm keeping my fingers crossed that she will give me a cortizone shot to allieviate the pain.

80 years??? I wouldn't have guessed. You sound a lot younger in your posts. Sharp minds are hard to guess age wise 🙂 I really hope you can get relief for your chronic pain. I can't imagine living with that day in and day out. I pulled a muscle in my back several years back and that gave me a smidgen of an idea what people with chronic pain go through. Mine was only temporary, I can't imagine living with that for the rest of your life. Exercise would be the last thing on my mind too if I would have to live with that.

[Finny]

1 minute ago, Colleenna said:

My girlies are getting old (as am I ). They're 16. Most of my kitties have made it to 18/19. Because of my age, when I lose these girls I will adopt a senior cat. It wouldn't be fair to adopt a kitten that, in all likelihood, would outlive me and have to be rehomed. 

Kudos and cyber hugs for that. Senior animals make wonderful pets and lots of time luck out on getting adopted. I would do the same like you. Mine are pretty young. 7,6,2 and my 3 foster fails at 1 1/2, 1 1/2 and 8 months. Since we always going to have pets, we're going to make provisions for our pets in our will to make sure they will be taken care off. 

[Dot]

5 hours ago, Finny said:

80 years??? I wouldn't have guessed. You sound a lot younger in your posts. Sharp minds are hard to guess age wise 🙂

Thank you! I am very grateful that, as age has taken its toll on many of my facilities, I so far have no sense of a loss of my mental powers.

[kar328]

On 3/26/2019 at 11:21 AM, Finny said:

😞 so sorry about losing your beloved pet. It's hard to come home and not being greeted by your best friend. I can't imagine not having pets. My furries are my babies... spoiled babies. They bring a lot of joy into our life. They love you no matter what. 

I'm in NC and our county and others have volunteer and foster programs with Animal Control and also non-profit rescues. They work together. Sadly our county does not have a TNR program. That would help a great deal getting a handle on feral cats. The new director is working on changing that but politicians like the easy way out and just euthanize instead doing a TNR. A lot of times strays can be re-homed. During the winter months when there are no kittens, adults have a great chance for adoption. Matter of fact all adult cats that were put in Petsmart for adoption were adopted and a good number at Animal Control. When kitten season starts that number drops considerable. The shelter often has no choice but to euthanize animals since there is only a certain number of spaces avail. 😞 It's not just strays... plenty owners just drop off their animals when they become an inconvenience (moving, vacation etc.) it is really sad.

I'm in Wake Co, NC and adopted a 4 month old kitten in October from the shelter. My first cat ever. I wasn't specifically looking for a kitten over an adult, her picture on the website and the name they gave her, "Halifax" caught my eye. She's now 9 months old and I'm still learning how to be a cat momma. She keeps me on my toes. 

Edited March 29, 2019 by kar328
making it sound better

[Colleenna]

Lord help me. I am having a M600PL kind of day. I feel like I could eat *continuously* until I go to bed. I'm not, of course. But it's taking every ounce of won't power I have to stay out of the kitchen. (And even if it was healthy stuff, too much is not a great idea). 

[Dot]

Well, my cataract surgery today went fine, at least in terms of I'm not dead! But I thus far see no discernible difference. Indeed, my vision is blurry right now. Keeping my fingers crossed that clears up soon.

Funny story: the anestheologist was flipping thru my paperwork & looked up at my 80-year-old being & said, "You've never had any surgery ever?"

He paused for a moment, then said, "Impressive."

(I've never even had my ears pierced. 😊)

[3girlsforus]

2 hours ago, Dot said:

Well, my cataract surgery today went fine, at least in terms of I'm not dead! But I thus far see no discernible difference. Indeed, my vision is blurry right now. Keeping my fingers crossed that clears up soon.

Funny story: the anestheologist was flipping thru my paperwork & looked up at my 80-year-old being & said, "You've never had any surgery ever?"

He paused for a moment, then said, "Impressive."

(I've never even had my ears pierced. 😊)

Excellent news Dot! And the anetstheologist is right - that is very impressive. I hope your vision clears up soon too. Hope the blurriness doesn’t make you too dizzy or nauseated. 

Edited April 11, 2019 by 3girlsforus

[Colleenna]

33 minutes ago, Dot said:

Well, my cataract surgery today went fine, at least in terms of I'm not dead! But I thus far see no discernible difference. Indeed, my vision is blurry right now. Keeping my fingers crossed that clears up soon.

Funny story: the anestheologist was flipping thru my paperwork & looked up at my 80-year-old being & said, "You've never had any surgery ever?"

He paused for a moment, then said, "Impressive."

(I've never even had my ears pierced. 😊)

Congratulations! You'll definitely see the difference. By Sunday you'll be amazed. 

[Me from ME]

Dot,, I'm so happy your surgery went well. I haven't been able to log in for a few days so I couldn't send you best wishes for the approaching procedure, but now that it is done I am happy for you that it is over. (My parents said that the most amazing thing was being able to see colors again. Let us know how your recovery  is going.)

(I probably won't be posting much for the next little while. I am taking a repositioning cruise to Europe and will be touring around a bit on a bicycle.)

[Mongo Like Candy]

Dot, congrats on making it through surgery!  That must be a huge relief. Hopefully the blur will resolve soon. 

[Dot]

16 hours ago, Mongo Like Candy said:

Dot, congrats on making it through surgery!  That must be a huge relief. Hopefully the blur will resolve soon. 

Thank you. I realize that cataract surgery is considered "routine." But I recall the words, years ago, of a friend of mine's husband who is a doctor: "No surgery is minor surgery." Meaning, of course, that so many things can go wrong. I'm just so happy nothing went wrong in my case.

[crazycatlady58]

5 hours ago, Dot said:

Thank you. I realize that cataract surgery is considered "routine." But I recall the words, years ago, of a friend of mine's husband who is a doctor: "No surgery is minor surgery." Meaning, of course, that so many things can go wrong. I'm just so happy nothing went wrong in my case.

Has your eyesight improved?

[Dot]

1 hour ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Has your eyesight improved?

Yeah, @Colleenna was right. The blurriness is gone & I can read text on the TV I couldn't read before. I can't read the 10-pt font in books yet & that's a bother since reading is my greatest pleasure.

[Colleenna]

12 minutes ago, Dot said:

Yeah, @Colleenna was right. The blurriness is gone & I can read text on the TV I couldn't read before. I can't read the 10-pt font in books yet & that's a bother since reading is my greatest pleasure.

Dot, after my cataract surgery, my distance and medium (computer monitor distance) vision was excellent, but I need el cheapo drugstore glasses for reading small type. You may find the same. 

[Mongo Like Candy]

On 4/13/2019 at 3:24 PM, Dot said:

I realize that cataract surgery is considered "routine." But I recall the words, years ago, of a friend of mine's husband who is a doctor: "No surgery is minor surgery."

Oh, I believe that utterly. I’m in the early stages of a cataract  in my right eye. Not looking forward to eventual surgery, mainly ‘cuz I was born without a left eye.  A surgeon’ll only get one shot with me, and I’m not looking forward to staring down the gun.  😳😳😳

[Dot]

6 minutes ago, Mongo Like Candy said:

Oh, I believe that utterly. I’m in the early stages of a cataract  in my right eye. Not looking forward to eventual surgery, mainly ‘cuz I was born without a left eye.  A surgeon’ll only get one shot with me, and I’m not looking forward to staring down the gun.  😳😳😳I

1. I'm sure the surgical nurses will take especially good care of you, as they did me, given your disability. And, of course, the surgeon as well. I'm sure you'll be as relieved -- and pleasantly surprised -- as I was. There're 4 million cataract surgeries each year, so that's as "routine" a procedure as can be imagined.  And, unfortunately, we're all stuck having to have cataract surgery if we live long enuf. Our eye lens just don't last as long as many of our body parts.
2. Autocorrect is adding these #s to my paragraphs, for some reason.