S17.E20: Decision Day Round One

[Rightside]

3 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

I liked Brennan and I don't think he's an evil android.  He was done with Emily about 10 minutes after he met her and was trying to deal with the fact that he publicly stated that he'd be married for life.  That was his biggest mistake.  It was nice to see their friendly parting at the end though. 

 

I don't think he is evil either, but when he wasn't attracted to Emily at the start he didn't even try to be friends with her. He dreamed that idea up too late.

[Crashcourse]

3 minutes ago, Rightside said:

I don't think he is evil either, but when he wasn't attracted to Emily at the start he didn't even try to be friends with her. He dreamed that idea up too late.

He might have tried to be friends with her, but since Emily probably knew he wasn't attracted to her, I doubt she was interested in being friends. 

He looked exhausted and zoned out throughout this "experiment."  She looked like she wanted to bite him in his sleep.

[Yeah No]

4 hours ago, Retired at last said:

If Becca and Austin agreed that they were going to stay married, then why weren't they together that night? That should have been Becca's first red flag for this round. Why was he available to date or meet up with a producer (who will maybe lose her job now?). I personally hated the jumping on Austin and the way Becca confronted him in the group. Sure, she needed her pack of mean girls to egg her on, but I don't think that setting was appropriate. Maybe that was part of the deal she made with production if they agreed to say yes on D Day.

Austin with the producer, not spending the night with her and then lying about it should have been Becca's last straw but so far they haven't shown her saying she's done for good.  What is she waiting for?  Or is this some kind of clever editing where they're keeping us on the hook until next week?

Austin is beginning to remind me a little of Jonathan Francetic and Dr. Jessica from season 6.  There was speculation that Jonathan had started seeing her even before his season ended and she eventually left the show because of her relationship with him.  His bride, Molly was no prize either but she definitely got the villain's edit on that season while he didn't look so bad.  Meanwhile, what was he doing behind her back?  He ended up marrying Dr. Jessica in 2022.

Of course the setting wasn't appropriate for the triple girl slam but the show probably engineered it to happen like that and on camera, I'm sure.  And to be honest, he had it coming.  The other girls were probably frustrated over Becca's wimpiness and decided to come down extra hard to make up for it.  I can't feel sorry for him.

 

[Yeah No]

42 minutes ago, Rightside said:

I don't think he is evil either, but when he wasn't attracted to Emily at the start he didn't even try to be friends with her. He dreamed that idea up too late.

He may not be "evil" but at the very least I think he's another self-centered prick or bastard.  Sorry but I don't see good qualities in him.  That stuff he did for Emily when she had her accident was just an act for the cameras, and that was obvious to me.  He didn't have his heart in it, it was all an act.  The guy has never even cracked a smile or done anything that wasn't completely self-serving.  And that look on his face tells the tale.  He always had a puss on his face like he was biding his time until this whole thing was over.  He couldn't even be bothered to humor the experts when he met with them and treated them with disrespect too (and then people wonder why Dr. Pia laced into him in such a fashion!).  His surly attitude defied any of their questions and he never put one ounce of effort into getting to know or like Emily.  And then he had the delusional NERVE to think he deserved praise for all he thinks he did to make the relationship work!  He didn't treat Emily with the decency and respect any human being deserves much less put any effort into their relationship!  I'm usually able to see the good and bad in anyone but he strikes me as so vile I can't forgive him. 

I don't get defending Brennan either.  It feels like some are buying into his BS and blaming Emily for his mistreatment of her.  Like she must be some kind of drunken bar hag and therefore deserves him shunning and detesting her or something.  Interestingly my husband feels exactly the same way.  Whatever Emily is or might be she didn't deserve the way he treated her.  She was kind of clueless but it's still not clear to me how much of a party girl she is or drinking problem she has.  Most of what we have seen that makes her look like that comes from the bachelorette party, not from everyday life.  And that scene at Michael and Chloe's wedding gets my side eye too.  All she's doing is dancing and maybe dropped a glass.  There would have to be a LOT more evidence for me to think she deserved ANY of what she got from this douche!

[Empress1]

52 minutes ago, Crashcourse said:

He might have tried to be friends with her, but since Emily probably knew he wasn't attracted to her, I doubt she was interested in being friends. 

He looked exhausted and zoned out throughout this "experiment."  She looked like she wanted to bite him in his sleep.

I don’t think he likes her, period. I keep coming back to the fact that he said he was “drained” after the honeymoon, and when he showed her his apartment his body language screamed “get her out of here.” Emily said she always gets ghosted and I think if he’d met her on Bumble and gone on a date with her, he’d have ghosted her. Maaaaaybe given her the old “I didn’t feel any chemistry” text, but probably ghosted her.

[Crashcourse]

I'd rather go to a party with Brennan over Emily.  He might sit there with a stone face, but the right woman could make him want to get up and dance. 🤣

Sure, a guy might wanna dance with drunk, twerking Emily, but she might be in danger.

Edited March 7 by Crashcourse

[Lindz]

The women were over the "making me look bad" & "protecting them" BS! WHAT "constructive & respectful" words did Brennan say??? He refused to answer questions!!! It's really easy to avoid negatively language, say the antonym! DUHHH!!! Then there's Becca who used negative words & Austin's stuck on how they made him look bad. So one spouse said nothing & one spouse said the wrong thing & both lost, neither spouse was happy! 🤷‍♀️ What was Clare calling Cam a liar for???? Why is she trying to be relevant?!!! He invited Brennan to hang out & double date when it's over & told her not to tell Emily? Uh. And??? Oh. Plays into the "silencing" complaint the women have. Cam lost it on that. Clare really had no place in the conversation since they were long over. 🙄

[Yeah No]

5 minutes ago, Crashcourse said:

I'd rather go to a party with Brennan over Emily.  He might sit there with a stone face, but the right woman could make him want to get up and dance. 🤣

Sure, a guy might wanna dance with drunk, twerking Emily, but she might be in danger.

I think Brennan is the way he is all the time and no one is going to make him any different.  He wouldn't have it.  Same with Austin, who defiantly said in this episode that he doesn't do anything he doesn't want to do.  Ever.  Like if it doesn't suit him 100%, forget it.  And that's why I think the two of them have been unsuccessful at finding a long term relationship.  It's a selfish and immature attitude.

I still want to see the evidence that Emily is a "drunk".  I haven't seen it.  I think a lot of that was a result of clever editing by the show and made into much more than it really is.  If there was more evidence, as sure as shit the show would have gotten it on camera and not have held it back.  I can remember other women on the show whose behavior was a lot worse and the show made sure they got it all on camera made us see the worst of it.  I don't doubt that Emily likes to party but she may be one of those people that parties hard but only at a party and then under normal circumstances doesn't act that way.  I have known a lot of people like that and it doesn't make them a drunk or deserving of any of the pissy attitude Brennan had about her.  Brennan may not know how to let his hair down and have a good time but that doesn't make Emily a bad person if she does.  I just don't get seeing this all from his messed up point of view.  The guy is an asshole, I am not going to buy into his view of anyone!

[Rightside]

Do we get an entire episode of Decision Day Round Two for the last couple???

There is also the "where are they now" with an expected evening gown competition!

So two more weeks of our national nightmare??

[Yeah No]

4 hours ago, seacliffsal said:

I really don't care for any of these participants.  However, I was surprised by Dr. Pia's obvious bias against Brennan.  These participants must have signed iron clad contracts as I can't imagine any reason most of them stayed in the decision day meetings with the 'experts' as well as the final confrontation at the 'party.'  I would have walked away from the final confrontation even as an innocent bystander as it was too accusatory and out of place. 

I agree that it was out of place, but I sympathize with Pia's sentiment and think it was actually based on personal experience with Brennan or observation of him, not some form of unfair bias.  Just from the surly and resistent way he acted every time he met with an expert or group of experts she had enough reason to personally dislike the guy and have something to say to him about it, but I agree that it either should have been kept to herself or done off camera in private.  But these "experts" say they don't act in the capacity of their profession on this show, so they don't think they have to act in a professional manner either.  I don't agree with them on that.  Dr. Pepper keeps it professional at all times, though.  Although even a professional will give you their opinion and it isn't necessarily unprofessional to do so, but in this case I agree with you.

[Lindz]

So. My takeaways: people looking for reasons to quit will find them, people who don't ask questions because they're too scared of the answers will have to face reality eventually, someone working their own agenda only lasts for so long & they'll end up solo, people should worry about how they come off to their partner, not the viewers, don't "protect" feelings by withholding the truth & don't use negative language, use the positive opposite, the person is responsible for getting what they want, they can't just expect to get it without asking & if they ask for it & their partner refuses, let it go or end it. If someone believes their partner is against them, end it.

[Hip-to-be-Square]

That pizza party fight was the only thing worth watching last night! First off, Cameron looked hot when he cussed Clare out- she shrunk down in her seat like a little prairie dog when he went toe to toe with her.  I LOVED IT! 😆🙌💯.   What the hell was up with Michael's overly distressed sweater?! And Emily's terribly unflattering boob cut out top- if you're going to show your tits off, do it right! 😖

These girls are awful dressers- they don't wear clothes that are flattering to their body types, they don't wear supportive bras and they don't wear the right colors for their skin tones.  

[call me ishmael]

1 hour ago, Yeah No said:

But these "experts" say they don't act in the capacity of their profession on this show, so they don't think they have to act in a professional manner either.  I don't agree with them on that.  Dr. Pepper keeps it professional at all times, though.  Although even a professional will give you their opinion and it isn't necessarily unprofessional to do so, but in this case I agree with you.

Exactly.  How can you claim that you deserve to be an "expert" because of your professional role and then say you can't be expected to be professional on the show.  You can't have it both ways (except on Lifetime I guess).

[Rightside]

1 hour ago, Hip-to-be-Square said:

These girls are awful dressers- they don't wear clothes that are flattering to their body types, they don't wear supportive bras and they don't wear the right colors for their skin tones.  

I expect ALL of what you said and more on the "where are they now?" episode ie evening gown competition!

Edited March 8 by Rightside

[Crashcourse]

1 hour ago, Yeah No said:

I think Brennan is the way he is all the time and no one is going to make him any different.  He wouldn't have it.  Same with Austin, who defiantly said in this episode that he doesn't do anything he doesn't want to do.  Ever.  Like if it doesn't suit him 100%, forget it.  And that's why I think the two of them have been unsuccessful at finding a long term relationship.  It's a selfish and immature attitude.

I still want to see the evidence that Emily is a "drunk".  I haven't seen it.  I think a lot of that was a result of clever editing by the show and made into much more than it really is.  If there was more evidence, as sure as shit the show would have gotten it on camera and not have held it back.  I can remember other women on the show whose behavior was a lot worse and the show made sure they got it all on camera made us see the worst of it.  I don't doubt that Emily likes to party but she may be one of those people that parties hard but only at a party and then under normal circumstances doesn't act that way.  I have known a lot of people like that and it doesn't make them a drunk or deserving of any of the pissy attitude Brennan had about her.  Brennan may not know how to let his hair down and have a good time but that doesn't make Emily a bad person if she does.  I just don't get seeing this all from his messed up point of view.  The guy is an asshole, I am not going to buy into his view of anyone!

Ok.  You have your opinions about Emily and Brennan, and I have mine, based on what I saw on camera.

So, let's just leave it at that.   

Edited March 7 by Crashcourse

[Auntie Anxiety]

1 hour ago, Hip-to-be-Square said:

What the hell was up with Michael's overly distressed sweater?!

After seeing that monstrosity, I wondered if he was an aspiring fashion designer that was wearing one of his hideous creations, like something you’d see on Project Runway. 

You can meet me in the shallow end if you’d like, but I didn’t realize just how bad Michael’s complexion is. That would have been a huge deal breaker for me, right from the get-go. The white head cropping up next to his nose wasn’t something I’ve often seen on 30+yo man. He should find a good dermatologist.

Were the women’s faces all blasted with sparkle before they arrived at the party? Is this a new makeup trend that I missed (I miss them all, actually, so there’s that)?

Do all adults in this age group talk around a topic instead of being direct? I’m a smart person but I couldn’t understand what they were trying to communicate. What exactly is their definition of “protect?” 

If religion was so important to Becca and Clare, why would the panel of nincompoops match them up with a guy who doesn’t observe that religion? 

Speaking of the panel of nincompoops, any of us watching could do a better job than those morons.

Edited March 8 by Auntie Anxiety

[Jodyj]

I almost understood the "lie" about the producer if it was one. it is one of two things.

Let's say he went with Brennan and a producer was there already and joined up with them. (Everyone was going to the same bar) Did you go to the bar with a producer? No is not a lie. 

Two. Becca told him she needed some alone time. He goes to the bar with his friends. He thinks everything is fine like he said on the way into that get together. Then Becca walks in BLASTS him in front of all the other people. He is stunned, humiliated and pretty much wants to end the yelling. So when she yells at him if he was with a producer he lied. He just wants it to end. 

This second scenario has literally happened to me. I had one hell of a childhood with a lot of yelling and you learn tricks and tips on how to defuse the "monster" yelling at you. One of those tricks is lie. Now as an adult I understand that is not the way to get out of things anymore but man trigger that inner child by coming at me strong and sometimes your brain reverts right back to the defuse the monster in any way possible. Again totally not saying that is right but it is something that happens. 

Becca was in the wrong in that moment. This was something that should have been done in private. Not with a harpy cheerleading team behind her egging her on. Hell Emily even told her "Do you want to change your answer now" UGH

[kristen111]

5 hours ago, Yeah No said:

still want to see the evidence that Emily is a "drunk".  I haven't seen it.  I think a lot of that was a result of clever editing by the show and made into much more than it really is.  If there was more evidence, as sure as shit the show would have gotten it on camera and not have held it back.  I can remember other women on the show whose behavior was a lot worse and the show made sure they got it all on camera made us see the worst of it.  I don't doubt that Emily likes to party but she may be one of those people that parties hard but only at a party and then under normal circumstances doesn't act that way.  I have known a lot of people like that and it doesn't make them a drunk or deserving of any of the pissy attitude Brennan had about her.  Brennan may not know how to let his hair down and have a good time but that doesn't make Emily a bad person if she does.  I just don't get seeing this all from his messed up point of view.  The guy is an asshole, I am not going to buy into his view of anyone!

The night of a party, wasn’t it Emily that had too much to drink and ripped the shower curtain while Brennan was taking a shower?  Then she was bothering him in the bed wanting sex and causing a commotion and wouldn’t let him sleep?  I would call that drunken rage.  Then, there was the scene of her drunk in a bar when she hopped up on the bar.  I don’t care for Brennon either, but she’s no prize  herself.  Just sayin.  They both are no good for each other.

[princelina]

19 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Hate to say it but even Cameron with all his lofty talk was full of shit too.

He's been full of shit since Day 1, when he told Clare after the wedding that his parents couldn't make it from New Zealand, but when they traveled back to visit them they would do a second wedding there for his family.  Followed by his dad knew nothing of the wedding.  Followed by he couldn't tell his dad because he's on his deathbed! Followed by it's actually a non-lethal chronic illness that he's had for years.  Followed by weeks of no contact (seriously - has anyone seen a doctor's note from this guy?) Followed by if she says yes at the reunion I will too.  Clare may be a bitch but he's always been a liar.  I think he had to run out of the pizza party because his pants were on fire!

7 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Whatever Emily is or might be she didn't deserve the way he treated her.  She was kind of clueless but it's still not clear to me how much of a party girl she is or drinking problem she has.  Most of what we have seen that makes her look like that comes from the bachelorette party, not from everyday life.  And that scene at Michael and Chloe's wedding gets my side eye too.  All she's doing is dancing and maybe dropped a glass.  There would have to be a LOT more evidence for me to think she deserved ANY of what she got from this douche!

 

6 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I still want to see the evidence that Emily is a "drunk".  I haven't seen it.  I think a lot of that was a result of clever editing by the show and made into much more than it really is.  

 

I agree that Brennan is an asshole, so I'm not defending him.  And Emily may or may not have a "drinking problem" but I think her drinking was a problem for him.  I didn't think he was checked out on the wedding day and she told us herself that on the honeymoon they were drunk and making out and she was pushing for sex and his attitude changed the next day.  He claimed she says she goes out drinking and likes one night stands.  We know that she told them before she was matched that she likes going out drinking/getting drunk with friends, which should be an automatic disqualifier if someone is clueless enough to tell them that!  (Virginia did it too!) Then the bachelorette party and the shower curtain evening - I think if she wants to meet a guy that's where she should tone it down some.  And I can see where it would be a turn-off for Brennan.  That being said - if he wanted to "protect" her he could have told her some of these things off camera.  Also:  I rewound the dropped wine glass at the wedding scene at the time - I don't think she was the dropper.

 

6 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Dr. Pepper keeps it professional at all times, though.  

She's especially professional when she's pulling their underpants out of the drawers and commenting on them! 😃

 

5 hours ago, Hip-to-be-Square said:

That pizza party fight was the only thing worth watching last night!

Haha I agree but for different reasons!  I loved the guys getting called out as liars after their careful presentations all season - the only thing that could have made it better would have been if they'd reminded Orion that he was a big fat liar too!!! 😈

[Hip-to-be-Square]

4 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

After seeing that monstrosity, I wondered if he was an aspiring fashion designer that was wearing one of his hideous creations, like something you’d see on Project Runway. 

You can meet me in the shallow end if you’d like, but I didn’t realize just how bad Michael’s complexion is. That would have been a huge deal breaker for me, right from the get-go. The white head cropping up next to his nose wasn’t something I’ve often seen on 30+yo man. He should find a good dermatologist.

Were the women’s faces all blasted with sparkle before they arrived at the party? Is this a new makeup trend that I missed (I miss them all, actually, so there’s that)?

Do all adults in this age group talk around a topic instead of being direct? I’m a smart person but I couldn’t understand what they were trying to communicate. What exactly is their definition of “protect?” 

If religion was so important to Becca and Clare, why would the panel of nincompoops match them up with a guy who doesn’t observe that religion? 

Speaking of the panel of nincompoops, any of us watching could do a better job than those morons.

    Michael probably had bad skin in his teens since he has scarring along his cheeks from acne- he could benefit from a dermatologist.   He needs a personal stylist, and he needs to fix his hair and remove his beard that is way too low on his face. 

   When it comes to makeup trends, I've noticed loading on the sparkly highlighter is big these days. I also can't understand what these MAFS Denver cast members say- they talk in circles or use therapy speak and they say "like" every other word- it's really annoying to hear them every week. 

[Yeah No]

6 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Do all adults in this age group talk around a topic instead of being direct? I’m a smart person but I couldn’t understand what they were trying to communicate. What exactly is their definition of “protect?” 

The best I could come up with is that they've spun the word "lie" into the word "protect".  Like "I'm not lying to you or hiding the truth from you for my own purposes, I'm really protecting you from some of my thoughts and feelings about you and our relationship to spare your feelings because I care about you."

In other words, it's a total lie and yet more BS.

[Yeah No]

3 hours ago, kristen111 said:

The night of a party, wasn’t it Emily that had too much to drink and ripped the shower curtain while Brennan was taking a shower?  Then she was bothering him in the bed wanting sex and causing a commotion and wouldn’t let him sleep?  I would call that drunken rage.  Then, there was the scene of her drunk in a bar when she hopped up on the bar.  I don’t care for Brennon either, but she’s no prize  herself.  Just sayin.  They both are no good for each other.

That was Brennan's description of what happened and I don't believe what comes out of his mouth, especially about her.  He was most likely exaggerating.  I would have to see it with my own eyes to believe it.  Surely if she was prone to that kind of drunken behavior the camera would have caught it again and we would have seen it.  I'm not sure but I think the top of the bar scene was yet again at the bachelorette party. 

We have seen some really wild stuff at bachelor/bachelorette parties over the years on this show and some of the wildest of people have not been characterized by the audience as a drunk and wild person, but somehow all it took was one or two parties and Brennan's attitude toward Emily for everyone to not only jump to conclusions about her but completely condemn her for it.  The reason I don't buy into them is that most of the time she doesn't act consistent with someone that lives that way all the time.  In fact I have seen other seasons where the entire cast does nothing but drink like fishes all season long and act like assholes as a result but no one has called them drunks and "party animals".  She seems downright tame by comparison to a lot of them.  Just sayin! 😉

[endure]

6 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

After seeing that monstrosity, I wondered if he was an aspiring fashion designer that was wearing one of his hideous creations, like something you’d see on Project Runway. 

You can meet me in the shallow end if you’d like, but I didn’t realize just how bad Michael’s complexion is. That would have been a huge deal breaker for me, right from the get-go. The white head cropping up next to his nose wasn’t something I’ve often seen on 30+yo man. He should find a good dermatologist.

Were the women’s faces all blasted with sparkle before they arrived at the party? Is this a new makeup trend that I missed (I miss them all, actually, so there’s that)?

Do all adults in this age group talk around a topic instead of being direct? I’m a smart person but I couldn’t understand what they were trying to communicate. What exactly is their definition of “protect?” 

If religion was so important to Becca and Clare, why would the panel of nincompoops match them up with a guy who doesn’t observe that religion? 

Speaking of the panel of nincompoops, any of us watching could do a better job than those morons.

Great post, all of these people are too much, they should call this show The Unmarriageables!

[Yeah No]

3 hours ago, princelina said:

I agree that Brennan is an asshole, so I'm not defending him.  And Emily may or may not have a "drinking problem" but I think her drinking was a problem for him.  I didn't think he was checked out on the wedding day and she told us herself that on the honeymoon they were drunk and making out and she was pushing for sex and his attitude changed the next day.  He claimed she says she goes out drinking and likes one night stands.  We know that she told them before she was matched that she likes going out drinking/getting drunk with friends, which should be an automatic disqualifier if someone is clueless enough to tell them that!  (Virginia did it too!) Then the bachelorette party and the shower curtain evening - I think if she wants to meet a guy that's where she should tone it down some.  And I can see where it would be a turn-off for Brennan.  That being said - if he wanted to "protect" her he could have told her some of these things off camera.  Also:  I rewound the dropped wine glass at the wedding scene at the time - I don't think she was the dropper.

Speaking of Virginia she showed more signs and behavior of someone with a drinking problem than Emily in my opinion.  Emily seems to have it more under control or she does more of it only in certain circumstances, like parties, gatherings and alone with a guy in a romantic setting.  Plus Emily does have a respectable career and is a responsible person as far as we know.  So again, I see her in a different category.  I'm not a party person either and understand that someone would not want to be matched with that, but why is she so roundly condemned for it?  Because he's a man and she should be more "ladylike"?  Not directed at you but I think some of it is sexist.  And yes, even women can be sexist.  Single men go out and paint the town red, get drunk, pick up women, but no one slut shames them.  At worst they get called a player but even then they're not as roundly frowned upon and people will still find things to like about them.  Cameron and Austin are cads and Brennan is another asshole and yet I haven't seen the same level of condemnation of them and people still find things to like about them!  

I am not a fan of Emily's lifestyle either but I think she's getting more condemnation because she's a woman.  In general she seems a bit clueless and self absorbed, but she's not a deceitful, deliberately deceptive and self-serving person like some of these men are.  And she has real feelings and shows them.  That to me is a sign of a better person.  Plus she actually approached Brennan to apologize for her role in things.  That to me shows character that he doesn't have, but she's hardly gotten any credit for that at all.  It's like she's wearing the scarlet letter and people can't see past it.

Maybe it's just this board.  When I go on other sites I see more people condemning the men and supporting the women.

Edited March 8 by Yeah No

[JenE4]

Wow. The “optics” vs “protection” gender war at the end was wild. How is it possible that every couple had the exact same issue? Or maybe Brennan started with the “protection” and Cam started with the “optics” and everyone else just latched on to whether they needed to accuse their partner with “optics” or defend themselves with “protection.”

The way they really amped each other up, getting angrier on their friends’ behalf than the friend was to begin with, I really wonder whether things might have gone a bit more smoothly for any of these couples if they weren’t thrown into the Petri dish with the others. Michael and Chloe were just clinging to each other looking horrified, probably wondering whether this is what they’ll devolve into—but hopefully being spared from it by having their own timeline (and a bit more maturity on their side).

Becca, what the hell? You caused me to have an utter self-crisis, but let’s stay married. Austin recoils in shock but then mumbled something indiscernible that I guess was an agreement? Then they go outside and look absolutely miserable. Mere hours later, Becca catches Austin in a lie. There must have been something flirty going on since the moment Austin named his fish after the producer, because Becca said it was an issue all along. If there was nothing romantic, he would have no reason to lie, er, “protect her” (from the truth) about whether she was there. Becca goes off on a tirade, Lauren even prompts her with, “What are you saying, Becca?” Clare says this is the perfect time to take back your decision. Team Optics seems to be winning the battle. But then Becca just slumps. Austin is the one who pipes up in response to Becca that it sounds like their marriage is over then. And Becca is shocked that he’s ending it. Huh?! Becca, are you not listening to yourself? This man has destroyed your self-worth. Why would you want to stay married?!

But going back to decision day… My favorite part of the episode was when Brennan was saying a lot of words (at least one-quarter of which was “protect you”) that didn’t actually mean anything, and they just kept cutting to Pastor Cal and Dr Pia’s very confused reaction shots. Then Pastor Cal puts up some praying hands, leans in and says I’m not sure how to phrase this, so you know he’s trying to come up with something very diplomatic, maybe some bible passage… and instead drops, Brennan, that is some BS. I died.

[kristen111]

7 hours ago, endure said:

Great post, all of these people are too much, they should call this show The Unmarriageables!

Yep, and that’s what they get for marrying a stranger.  What did they expect?  The most ridiculous thing ever.  I think they go on for exposure for some reason.

[Yeah No]

I just wanted to say that while Emily gets slut shamed for one night stands, etc., the other women (and men) have probably done the same thing but they just don't admit to it publicly.  Lauren actually admitted to it and look where it got her with Orion, although for some reason she didn't get slut shamed here.  And it looks to me like some of the others do their fair share of drinking too, like Austin, but they're not given the scarlet letter for it because they keep it more under wraps.  And men generally seem to get more of a pass for such behavior.  Emily actually acts more like a traditional man when it comes to that stuff, and she's unapologetic about it, too.  That's the younger generations for you.  A lot of them are on Tinder swiping left and right and hooking up for sex, but most of them are just not admitting to it.  Unfortunately where women are concerned a lot of younger men would not like that behavior in a woman even if they engaged in it themselves.  It's the old double standard, which makes every hair on my neck stand on end.  Enough said!

[Yeah No]

One more thing - When Emily said Brennan told her he "had enough on her to ruin her" what was he talking about?  Her so-called "wanton ways"?  Because who but him is going to give 2 shits about that in today's world when so many are doing that and more?  The way he has vilified her is unbelievable!

[seacliffsal]

The producers really need to show us more of the footage from when the couples are alone.  They used it for the cinemax scene of Michael and Chloe, why not show us what is REALLY happening behind the scenes.  I think they all have been on their "camera" behavior-including those who are the fastest to accuse the others.  I bet the behind the scenes stuff would really enlighten us as viewers.  Otherwise, we are witnessing the idea of 'those who yell the loudest/overtalk the others the most' win, when, in reality, none of them have 'won' proving that they were the better person. 

I think Becca uses tears to get out of a lot and that she is just as responsible as Austin for their relationship failings.  She was shocked that Austin wanted to end the marriage after the pizza confrontations?  Really?

[Retired at last]

We DID get a glimpse of the cameras when we saw Becca and Austin arguing about on- and -off-camera behavior and the ever important "optics" accusations.

[princelina]

11 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Speaking of Virginia she showed more signs and behavior of someone with a drinking problem than Emily in my opinion.  Emily seems to have it more under control or she does more of it only in certain circumstances, like parties, gatherings and alone with a guy in a romantic setting.  Plus Emily does have a respectable career and is a responsible person as far as we know.  So again, I see her in a different category.  I'm not a party person either and understand that someone would not want to be matched with that, but why is she so roundly condemned for it?  Because he's a man and she should be more "ladylike"?  Not directed at you but I think some of it is sexist.  And yes, even women can be sexist.  Single men go out and paint the town red, get drunk, pick up women, but no one slut shames them.  At worst they get called a player but even then they're not as roundly frowned upon and people will still find things to like about them.  Cameron and Austin are cads and Brennan is another asshole and yet I haven't seen the same level of condemnation of them and people still find things to like about them!  

I am not a fan of Emily's lifestyle either but I think she's getting more condemnation because she's a woman.  In general she seems a bit clueless and self absorbed, but she's not a deceitful, deliberately deceptive and self-serving person like some of these men are.  And she has real feelings and shows them.  That to me is a sign of a better person.  Plus she actually approached Brennan to apologize for her role in things.  That to me shows character that he doesn't have, but she's hardly gotten any credit for that at all.  It's like she's wearing the scarlet letter and people can't see past it.

Maybe it's just this board.  When I go on other sites I see more people condemning the men and supporting the women.

I don't think anyone is "slut shaming" Emily - I was just pointing out that what she said and what Brennan said dovetailed and made me think that was the reason.  Obviously even he didn't "slut shame" her or she would have known why he was turned off! 😄

I agree with you that Emily seems more like a "partier" than an alcoholic.  I like her actually; I just think that if she wants a lasting relationship she should look at what she's doing to find one and make some changes since it's not working.  And if she's hooking up with guys who drink too much and sleep around - that's a problem too!

Just for fun I will condemn ALL the guys!  😃

Brennan:  you're a liar with a giant stick up your ass

Austin:  you're a liar and a weenie and a puss

Cameron: you're the biggest liar of all and since you come off as the nicest one, I hate you the most

Orion:  you're a liar and a sniveling little poseur who thinks you are way more important than you are (and I actually hate you the most and Cam 2nd hee hee)

I can't stand any of them!  And the wives aren't perfect but I could go out for drinks with them and keep a civil tongue in my head, which I couldn't for any of the douchebag guys.  If you had told me on the first night that ridiculous looking Michael would have turned out to be the best guy on the season I'd have laughed and laughed! 

[Haute Messe]

My opinion of Emily is based on the fact that she has never been in a relationship, and so how on earth is she supposed to know how to navigate a marriage? She is immature and her annoying vocal fry put me off her immediately. And the icing on the cake was when her obnoxious friends came over and pretty much attacked Brennan without even knowing him. I just think that he got to the point that every single thing she said or did irritated the crap out of him. And if she actually did say she "hated" things I can see how he could find her negative.  It didn't occur to me that she had a drinking problem, certainly not at Virginia levels.

I'm not defending Brennan either but that Pia was way out of line in her treatment of him. All this "protection" nonsense sounded like an excerpt from Zach's word salad handbook.

Becca has the ugliest cryface I've ever seen. And yes, I would have loved to have seen some of the off camera footage to find out what was the real problem.

Michael and Chloe look like the fakest couple. They may stick it out til D day but that will be the end of them.

 

 

[kristen111]

What’s the old adage .. “ it’s a Mans World”.  

Edited March 9 by kristen111

[Gator Stud]

On 3/7/2024 at 8:08 AM, Retired at last said:

I personally hated the jumping on Austin and the way Becca confronted him in the group. Sure, she needed her pack of mean girls to egg her on, but I don't think that setting was appropriate.

It was perfect because when Austin lied about the producer, the mean girls could provide the evidence. Becca was experiencing reality in real time.  The producer really pushed her over the edge.  I thought it was great that she was confronting him like that in front of people. He deserved it for saying yes, but then hanging out with a female at a bar drinking.

On 3/7/2024 at 8:08 AM, Retired at last said:

The way everyone was sucking up to Emily reminded me of the season when they did that to Haley and totally trashed Jake

Have you noticed that producers and experts sucking up to Emily and Keisha tolerating her asking questions on her show? My theory is after the accident, they gave her anything she wanted and always took her side.  Because of the potential lawsuit.  I noticed her boobs went up a size.  Did MAFS pay for that as well as part of the settlement? 

[Elizzikra]

1 hour ago, Haute Messe said:

My opinion of Emily is based on the fact that she has never been in a relationship, and so how on earth is she supposed to know how to navigate a marriage?

That never bothered me. How many failed relationships does one have to have to qualify for being marriage material? Brennan had relationships and I think he is a terrible partner and a lousy communicator.

11 minutes ago, Gator Stud said:

It was perfect because when Austin lied about the producer, the mean girls could provide the evidence. Becca was experiencing reality in real time.  The producer really pushed her over the edge.  I thought it was great that she was confronting him like that in front of people. He deserved it for saying yes, but then hanging out with a female at a bar drinking.

I wanted to know more about that whole situation. Was it just Brennan chaperoning a date between Austin and the producer? Or was it really a “whole group of them” that met up? Was this why they showed the producer at the end of Becca and Austin’s decision day when they don’t usually show the crew? Did Austin behave less than platonically with the producer? Why did Austin act so squirrels if he really didn’t have anything to hide?

I think there were suspicions about Austin and the producer before decision day and that’s why it happened the way it did. 
 

Also, for all the shit Michael gets about his clothing choices, that hideous thing Michael wore on Decision Day in as one of the ugliest things I’ve ever seen on a woman or a man.

[Auntie Anxiety]

If you have so many secrets that need protection (whatever that means), then what the hell are you doing on this show in the first place? 

I stopped watching after the Boston season (I live in the area) and started up again halfway through this season because I wanted to watch Prison Brides which follows it. Married at First Sight jumped the shark years ago. Someone needs to put this crapfest out of its misery.

I keep wondering who got custody of the goldfish, Becca or Austin?

Edited March 8 by Auntie Anxiety

[Gator Stud]

14 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Single men go out and paint the town red, get drunk, pick up women, but no one slut shames them.

These people are called manwhores. Men get shit too for being one night stand junkies.

14 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I am not a fan of Emily's lifestyle either but I think she's getting more condemnation because she's a woman.

No, she deserves the comments. Its not because she is a woman.  She said she enjoys one-night stands and only get ghosted after the first date.  We saw her act woo-hooo during the bachelorette party. She is contantly getting into accidents.  She might have a drinking problem, although she didnt drop the glass at Michaels wedding.  If a guy told a woman that he enjoyed one night stands and that women never called him back, the woman would demand the guy get tested for STDs. If a guy couldnt hold their alcohol every time they drank and got all woo-hoo, that would be an issue for the woman. This doesnt mean that I like Brennan at all in any way. But she gave him an easy out.

[Yeah No]

2 hours ago, princelina said:

I don't think anyone is "slut shaming" Emily - I was just pointing out that what she said and what Brennan said dovetailed and made me think that was the reason.  Obviously even he didn't "slut shame" her or she would have known why he was turned off! 😄

I agree with you that Emily seems more like a "partier" than an alcoholic.  I like her actually; I just think that if she wants a lasting relationship she should look at what she's doing to find one and make some changes since it's not working.  And if she's hooking up with guys who drink too much and sleep around - that's a problem too! 

I was responding to the comments that said Brennan was disgusted with her lifestyle, her drinking, her partying, her sleeping around as if she should expect to be treated with disrespect because of that.  They sounded like slut shaming to me.  Just the way Orion sounded like he was slut shaming Lauren for having one nighters, and that was called out here too.

I think there are plenty of reasons to criticize Emily that don't have to do with her partying or her sex life, or put her down like she's trash.  Her social cluelessness is a big one.  I will agree that one shouldn't flaunt their sex life to strangers, especially a man you've just met.  She was open with the world about it before she even got married.  Not a good idea.  You have to trust people before you tell them your personal shit.  It's obvious why she's never had a long term relationship.  She doesn't know how to handle one.  That said I think Brennan is an asshole and I think matching him would have been near impossible too for other reasons.  I don't know if Emily has the self-awareness to figure out what she's doing to sabotage herself.  Obviously she wants more than one night stands so she has reasons to figure that out but the only way people make changes is to become more self aware and she isn't there yet.

26 minutes ago, Gator Stud said:

These people are called manwhores. Men get shit too for being one night stand junkies.

No, she deserves the comments. Its not because she is a woman.  She said she enjoys one-night stands and only get ghosted after the first date.  We saw her act woo-hooo during the bachelorette party. She is contantly getting into accidents.  She might have a drinking problem, although she didnt drop the glass at Michaels wedding.  If a guy told a woman that he enjoyed one night stands and that women never called him back, the woman would demand the guy get tested for STDs. If a guy couldnt hold their alcohol every time they drank and got all woo-hoo, that would be an issue for the woman. This doesnt mean that I like Brennan at all in any way. But she gave him an easy out.

I think it's OK to criticize Emily for what she's doing to sabotage herself from finding a long term relationship (like settling for one night stands when she wants more) because she deserves better and should figure that out, but as soon as it sound like disrespect, I'm not for it.  She herself was responding to Brennan with that complaint - that he didn't treat her with respect.  He didn't just not like her, he didn't respect her at all and that was obvious.  Somehow men just don't get on the receiving end of that kind of disrespect.  I speak from experience.  I'm old - when I was young just making out with a guy could earn you a "reputation", never mind going on dates and being "popular" with men.  People would make assumptions if you weren't conscious of how you came across.  I managed to avoid that kind of reputation but it was always a thing back in the day.

[Vanderboom]

On 3/7/2024 at 4:04 PM, Yeah No said:

Austin is beginning to remind me a little of Jonathan Francetic and Dr. Jessica from season 6.  There was speculation that Jonathan had started seeing her even before his season ended and she eventually left the show because of her relationship with him.  His bride, Molly was no prize either but she definitely got the villain's edit on that season while he didn't look so bad.  Meanwhile, what was he doing behind her back?  He ended up marrying Dr. Jessica in 2022.

Thanks. I was trying to remember the details, but I also thought about that when Austin was caught hanging out with a producer.

I get why Pia finds Brennan irritating, but as an "expert," she should have found better ways of handling her frustration. On the other hand, Brennan sounds like a particularly passive-aggressive AI: "Forgive me for trying to protect you." 🙄🙄🙄

 

[Blissfool]

 

2 hours ago, Elizzikra said:

I wanted to know more about that whole situation. Was it just Brennan chaperoning a date between Austin and the producer? Or was it really a “whole group of them” that met up? Was this why they showed the producer at the end of Becca and Austin’s decision day when they don’t usually show the crew? Did Austin behave less than platonically with the producer? Why did Austin act so squirrels if he really didn’t have anything to hide?

I got curious because I don't remember any crew members being shown so I went back and looked. There were no "extras." Did you mean Emily and Brennan's d-day because there was definitely an unknown lady (a producer?) lingering around.

 

[princelina]

2 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

I keep wondering who got custody of the goldfish, Becca or Austin?

Haha or who got to flush it! 😄

Edited March 8 by princelina

[Elizzikra]

1 hour ago, Blissfool said:

 

I got curious because I don't remember any crew members being shown so I went back and looked. There were no "extras." Did you mean Emily and Brennan's d-day because there was definitely an unknown lady (a producer?) lingering around.

 

I remember a black leather jacket? It could have been Brennan and Emily. 

[Starlight925]

Those goldfish were named for producers.  $100 says that Austin has had a thing for a producer this whole time, hence the name.  I bet it was an inside joke between him & the producer, like hey, I get to say your name on camera.  

He goes out the night they both say yes, but doesn't even have the courtesy to tell her he's going out?  Like, a simple text:  hey hon, going out with Brennan, be home late.  And then, when she confronts him, he word salads her to the point of her thinking she's crazy (gaslight anyone?), and he looks like this poor, woe-is-me victim.

I really don't care that she did it in a group.  Maybe she needed the strength of her girl squad.  All of them were done dirty by these guys this season.

I can't stand Clare, but Cameron is no prize.  I love Lauren, and she got the short straw with loser Orion.  Emily drives me nuts with her pursed duck lip thing, but Brennan has this quiet, future-Dateline glare.

Edited March 9 by Starlight925

[Elizzikra]

55 minutes ago, Starlight925 said:

 

He goes out the night they both say yes, but doesn't even have the courtesy to tell her he's going out?  Like, a simple text:  hey hon, going out with Brennan, be home late.  

I don’t think they were living together. He had moved out and I don’t think that he moved back in that night. I think she was still in the MAFS apartment.

[Retired at last]

The fact that they had just agreed to actually stay married that day and they didn't go to someone's home that night should have told Becca that it wasn't real. The show and cameras were over, so they should have gone to one of their apartments, since I imagine they both had to be out of the show one when they went to the D Day meeting. They could have even gone to. hotel or something, but the fact that they didn't should have been all that Becca needed to see.

[Gator Stud]

23 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I just wanted to say that while Emily gets slut shamed for one night stands, etc., the other women (and men) have probably done the same thing but they just don't admit to it publicly.  Lauren actually admitted to it and look where it got her with Orion, although for some reason she didn't get slut shamed here.  And it looks to me like some of the others do their fair share of drinking too, like Austin, but they're not given the scarlet letter for it because they keep it more under wraps.  And men generally seem to get more of a pass for such behavior. 

Emily did admit to liking one night stands and her favorite hobby is drinking?  What did she expect? She did not have to admit it.  Lauren never said she was a one-night stand Queen.  She said she had sex before the experiment started.  If you drink alot and can handle your alcohol, nobody would think you have a drinking problem.  Drunk are drunks regardless of their gender.  When Vincent was freaking with the strippers, he was called out. I disagree that Emily is being treated harshly or in a sexist way.

[kristen111]

By the looks of Brennon AND his Parents, they remind me of “old school”.  Brennon doesn’t want a woman who will be he mother of his children to be a party girl who drinks heavily, has had one night stands, dresses like Fredricks of Hollywood.  Period.  I don’t know why he signed up for this.  Plus, she is not Jewish.   She is a sweet girl, but has lots of mileage on, and I hate her obnoxious friends.  They are a reflection on her.  I don’t care for Brennen, but I get how he feels about her.

 

 

Edited March 9 by kristen111

[Yeah No]

22 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

By the looks of Brennon AND his Parents, they remind me of “old school”.  Brennon doesn’t want a woman who will be he mother of his children to be a party girl who drinks heavily, has had one night stands, dresses like Fredricks of Hollywood.  Period.  I don’t know why he signed up for this.  Plus, she is not Jewish.   She is a sweet girl, but has lots of mileage on, and I hate her obnoxious friends.  They are a reflection on her.  I don’t care for Brennen, but I get how he feels about her.

Brennan's father is supposedly from Russia and on other sites people are saying his attitudes towards women are likely coming from his father.  And they're not saying that in a flattering way either.

Edited March 9 by Yeah No

[Elizzikra]

2 hours ago, Retired at last said:

The fact that they had just agreed to actually stay married that day and they didn't go to someone's home that night should have told Becca that it wasn't real. The show and cameras were over, so they should have gone to one of their apartments, since I imagine they both had to be out of the show one when they went to the D Day meeting. They could have even gone to. hotel or something, but the fact that they didn't should have been all that Becca needed to see.

I think they get a day or two to move out? In past seasons, it seems that they are moving out at least a day after decision day. I’m guessing it takes a big chunk of the day to get out to where they film, film the D-day segment and then get back home. 

[Hip-to-be-Square]

Who gets the pet fish in Becca and Austin's inevitable divorce 😅? Becca should block his number and he can get sole custody of the beta fish named after his producer fuckbuddy! 😏

Edited March 9 by Hip-to-be-Square