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Chit-Chat: What's On Your Mind Today?


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

We all have been drawn into off-topic discussions, me included. There's little that's off-topic when it comes to Chit Chat, so the only ask is that you please remember that this is the Chit Chat topic and that there's a subforum for all things health and wellness here.

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28 minutes ago, nokat said:

For people who fly (on planes, not brooms; sorry witches 😸) how do you entertain yourselves? Do you sleep, do you read, do you watch a movie or listen to music?

It's been a while. I usually read or do crossword puzzles. I have a loaded kindle and some music on the phone. I have a window seat because I can stare out the window for hours.

I'm terrified that my IBS will kick in so I'm thinking of the most dull food I can eat the day before the flight.

I read a book, do a crossword puzzle.  I also take a Lomotil before leaving for the airport, just as a precaution. 

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8 minutes ago, emma675 said:

I read and make sure I have a movie or a few episodes of something downloaded to my Kindle (I refuse to pay for plane wifi). I also get an aisle seat so I don't have to climb over others to get to the restroom. Plus, the window seat makes my claustrophobia kick in for some reason. 

That would be the middle seat for me. A person on either side, and I wish I could shrink. I don't like people walking past when I'm trying to read but I like the leg room on an aisle seat.  My worst seat was an aisle seat near the restroom. No leg room and crotches or butts near my face the entire flight.

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(edited)

I spend about half my time reading and half watching something.  I generally only sleep when it's an overnight flight, but sometimes I'll nod off for a nap after breakfast if it's a morning flight.  Especially if I've had quite a few Bloody Marys (not because of the vodka - I can drink that until the cows come home - because I'm one of those people tomato juice makes sleepy if I drink a lot of it).

Edited by Bastet
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I have another question for NY City folks. Where was Best & Company located? I'm reading "Leave The Gun Take The Cannoli" & am at the part where Coppola & staff are mapping out where they'll shoot Kay & Michael Xmas shopping. It was supposed to be Macy's but they used Best's. I can't remember being in that store (we loved Altman's).

45 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

I have another question for NY City folks. Where was Best & Company located? I'm reading "Leave The Gun Take The Cannoli" & am at the part where Coppola & staff are mapping out where they'll shoot Kay & Michael Xmas shopping. It was supposed to be Macy's but they used Best's. I can't remember being in that store (we loved Altman's).

No idea. There seemed to have been many relocations over the years. Perhaps this is helpful. 

From Wikipedia:

The flagship Best & Co. department store was originally located in the "Ladies' Mile" near Sixth Avenue and 23rd Street. In 1908, Best & Co. spent $500,000 to purchase the former Engineer's Club at 372 Fifth Avenue at 35th Street for a new store, joining an elite group of merchants to locate in that section of Fifth Avenue in the early 1900s, including B. Altman (365 Fifth Avenue), Gorham (390 Fifth Avenue), and Tiffany's (401 Fifth Avenue).[3] This limestone building later became the Bond Clothing Stores flagship when Best moved farther up the avenue and was later converted to apartments.[4] Its final 12-story flagship store was located at Fifth Avenue and 51st Street, directly north of St. Patrick's Cathedral. The store replaced 645 Fifth Avenue and the Union Club of the City of New York.[5][6] After it closed in late 1970, the white marble building was torn down and the Olympic Tower was built in its place.

 

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10 hours ago, nokat said:

For people who fly (on planes, not brooms; sorry witches 😸) how do you entertain yourselves? Do you sleep, do you read, do you watch a movie or listen to music?

I mostly read, sometimes nap a little (I can't really sleep in public*), or will watch a movie on the in-flight entertainment if it's included in the price of the flight.  I won't pay extra.  I will take my own headphones/earbuds, just in case.  

It also depends a little on the timing and length of the flight.  If it's a long, overnight flight, I'll try to sleep a bit.  Long, daytime flight, I'll watch a movie or two, and maybe nap.  Shorter flights, I'll read and try to nap a little.  I also like the window seat -- I have some pretty nice photos of my destinations from above.

*I even had a miles upgrade once to a lie-flat seat in a cozy little pod and still didn't actually sleep. 

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8 hours ago, Browncoat said:

*I even had a miles upgrade once to a lie-flat seat in a cozy little pod and still didn't actually sleep.

That was me on an overnight flight from LA to London.  I changed into the jammies, the flight attendant turned the seat into a bed, I climbed in, and ... nothing.  I watched I don't know how many movies/shows on that flight.  I finally fell asleep, but it wasn't very long before it was time for breakfast.

I generally don't sleep well the first night in any new bed.  So on long trips where I'm wandering from place to place, changing hotels once or twice a week, it's challenging.  I do pretty well if I'm someplace where I walk pretty much all day, as I wear myself out enough to fall asleep.

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I've only flown once in my life, when I was thirteen, and I didn't sleep on that flight, either. But in my case, it was because the flight back home was one of those "everything that could go wrong did" types of flights, so it was hard for me to relax long enough to where I could get any sleep even if I wanted to :p.

That, and given this was my first time on a plane in general, I think some of my initial anxiety made it hard for me to sleep, too. But honestly, I'd be fine just spending my time reading or writing or listening to music or something anyway, so...

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1 hour ago, nokat said:

@Annber03I've had those flights when something bad happened and now have associations that go with flying.

I think that is adding to my anxiety.

I was going to go to Switzerland the summer after I graduated from university, but 9/11 happened and I refused to fly more than three hours for the next year and a half.

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What are everyone’s thoughts about male work friends and discussing sexual topics?

There is someone I work with I consider a friend. I’ve known him for years, and he never has had much of a filter. But it’s gotten worse lately. I told him something he said made me uncomfortable, and he told me it won’t happen again.

I don’t want to come across as an uptight prude. It’s not like I met him and he started sharing personal stuff. But I don’t even know how to respond to some stuff he says. I am not going into stuff I’ve done or that I’m into, and I don’t really care to know his stuff either. 

 

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5 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

I don’t want to come across as an uptight prude.

If you're uncomfortable, you're uncomfortable. That doesn't make you a prude. It's just a label people apply to judge others.

Frankly, some filter at the workplace is important IMO. Just tell him to cut it out and when he does it again, interrupt and tell him you don't want to know.

 

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20 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

What are everyone’s thoughts about male work friends and discussing sexual topics?

There is someone I work with I consider a friend. I’ve known him for years, and he never has had much of a filter. But it’s gotten worse lately. I told him something he said made me uncomfortable, and he told me it won’t happen again.

I don’t want to come across as an uptight prude. It’s not like I met him and he started sharing personal stuff. But I don’t even know how to respond to some stuff he says. I am not going into stuff I’ve done or that I’m into, and I don’t really care to know his stuff either. 

 

Maybe remind him what IS and ISN'T safe for work discussion?  I wouldn't want male, female or whatever to discuss anything that's NSFW talk.

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I flew round trip to Ireland last year and my biggest issue was that my iPad ran out of power.  I would normally read something on my kindle, but really couldn’t after that.  I can never sleep on a plane and don’t usually watch the movie, though I sometimes sneak a peek at what the person in front of me is watching.

Not very helpful I know sorry @nokat!  Speaking of food though I will never order a vegetarian meal on a plane again.  I got the most awful boiled veggies over plain rice.  I’m going to take my luck with the usual next time, whatever it is.

Good luck with your flight!

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2 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

I don’t want to come across as an uptight prude. It’s not like I met him and he started sharing personal stuff. But I don’t even know how to respond to some stuff he says. I am not going into stuff I’ve done or that I’m into, and I don’t really care to know his stuff either.

Why do women feel uncomfortable letting a man know he's crossed a line? I guess he doesn't realize the trouble he could be in if you (or another female co-worker) reported him. It wasn't until I reached my early 40's when I'd had enough with men telling dirty jokes (always denigrating the female body somehow). I said I didn't want to hear any jokes about women. Lots of protests ("Awww...just kiddin' around"). I held my ground and never had to hear any jokes about women again. 

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52 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

The vile things men told me irl is astounding. Men are truly gross.

I hope we both have better luck with men soon. It's sad but I think when you're nice and laidback, men figure they can say anything to you without fear of being reported to HR. I'm not a Karen, but I have limits. 

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50 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

Why do women feel uncomfortable letting a man know he's crossed a line?

Because of how often they're treated like they're the problem -- dismissed as needing to lighten up at best or branded as a troublemaker at worst.  Workplaces and society at large completely fail women in this regard.  So, yes, women need to say "That's inappropriate; knock it off" but the big thing is that they need to be backed up on that.

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4 minutes ago, Bastet said:

Because of how often they're treated like they're the problem -- dismissed as needing to lighten up at best or branded as a troublemaker at worst.  Workplaces and society at large completely fail women in this regard.  So, yes, women need to say "That's inappropriate; knock it off" but the big thing is that they need to be backed up on that.

100% One time when I didn't appreciate what one of the guys said, he told me to grow some hair on my chest. 

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Speaking of shit show, that's a phrase I guess was always around but it really wasn't used quite as frequently as today.  My guess is certain/phrases words evolve as necessary.  And imo a lot of things area shit show today.

 

Another phrase that's popular is the use of the phrase Really when someone does something to annoy you or what not.  Really John!    Again not a phrase I heard all that much when I was younger.

 

But other phrases come and go:

 

Bad in the 80s to describe something good

Not! in the 90s after Wayne's world.  Also Phat in the late 90s was common.  As was saying mad in front of everything.  Like this is mad hot.  Or this is mad good.  Another phrase that isnt common much anymore 

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(edited)

Not trying to bring down the room, but read this today, and thought it was so smart and thoughtful. We (at least I) tend to ask generic, almost unanswerable questions in times like this, almost hoping for a "no, I'm fine" response. Maybe. Not always, but sometimes?

This is a better way to go.

*************************************************************

Grief Groceries!

I saw this letter today- as a funeral directors son, I have been around this for years. This is some of the best advice I have ever seen.

I get it. Grief is a funny thing. It’s the time in our life when we most need help, and also the time when asking for help is so hard. Not because we are ashamed to ask for help, although that happens sometimes too. But mostly because our brain just sort of shuts down.

When my Dad died, I looked functional. But I wasn’t OK. Not at all. And when the news got out, the ton of people flooding me with calls, texts, and DM’s was overwhelming. I really couldn’t function. I sat on the swing in our yard and just stared into space. People called and asked what they could do to help. I had no idea.

“Well, anything you need at all, let me know, OK?”

“OK”.

They hung up. I stared into space some more.

I had no idea what to do. What I needed. I didn’t even know what to ask for.

Then a friend sent a text. This friend had met Dad once but didn’t really know him. But still, she knew I was hurting. I saw who it was and almost put the phone down without reading the text, but I saw the message and it stopped me:

Will you be home at 8:30 tonight?

What’s weird is this friend lives 12 hours away from me.

Yes, I replied.

“K.”

10 minutes later, she said, “Instacart will be there at 8:30. Open the door for them.”

“What?”

“Grief Groceries.!!”

When Instacart showed up, they put two large bags of groceries on my porch. Frozen pizzas. Ice cream. Oreo cookies. Tinned soup. Stouffer’s lasagna. A gallon of milk. Like that. Things I could heat up if I needed a meal, or pig out on if I needed fat and sugar. Sometimes, you just need to eat half a box of Oreos.

Notice she didn’t ask if I needed any food. I would have said no. She just asked if I would be home.

Grief groceries.

Another friend, who lives out of town, asked Renee to name a restaurant near our house where we like to eat. There is a local chain near our house that is sort of a deli. When we eat supper there, we spend about $25. Renee told her the name of the place.

An hour later, there was a gift card in my inbox for $250. Yes, that is a lot of money, and I understand not everyone can do that. But the wonderful thing was that because it was enough for multiple meals, we didn’t try to save it for “the right time”. We ate there that night, and take out from there several times a week for the next month on nights when I just didn’t have the spoons to cook.

Both of those gift-givers knew something I didn’t know – that when you are grieving, you don’t want to make decisions. No, that’s not quite it: You can’t make decisions. You hit decision fatigue really fast.

So, I guess what I’m saying is, don’t ask grieving people to make big choices or decisions. “How can I help” is a big choice. But “Can I take the kids this afternoon so you can have some time to yourself” is a much smaller one. “Will you be home tonight?” is a small choice. “What restaurant do you like” is a small decision. Just showing up to cut their grass because you noticed it needed cutting is loads better than asking, “Do you want me to cut the grass?” Or, “I’m going to Target. What can I get you while I’m there?” is better than “Can I run any errands for you?”

It won’t always be like this. If you stick around, eventually they will surface and ways to be helpful will make themselves known. But in the first few days, especially, it helps to remove as many decisions from their plate as you can!”

Original Words from: Hugh Hollowell Jr.

Edited by SuprSuprElevated
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7 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Remember the Pandemic? Of course you do, we held each other close here for the duration. Do you remember we had to wash our hands for a certain amount of time, 30 seconds or a minute or something. Did anyone else sing a little ditty while washing? Mine was Little Bunny Foo Foo.

I sang "Old MacDonald", with lots of interesting variations on what he had on his farm, such as a COVID patient, with a cough cough here and a cough cough there.  I know, I know, it's a serious, potentially deadly disease, but I do tend to have a bit of a morbid sense of humor.

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(edited)
3 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

Does anyone here recall a discussion on this or another thread (maybe a Small Talk thread?) about lower-priced water pitcher filters at Costco for Brita or maybe a Costco-brand pitchers? 
What was the name of the pitcher and filters available at Costco?

Thanks! 

Website today shows a Brita and a Kirkland (Costco) brand only. Both essentially the same; 10c capacity, 2 filters, filter life indicators.  K - 29.99, B - 42.99

Edited by SuprSuprElevated
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Just now, SuprSuprElevated said:

Website today shows a Brita and a Kirkland (Costco) brand only. Both ssntially th sam; 10c capacity, 2 filters, filter life indicators.  K - 29.99, B - 42.99

Thank you!

 

2 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Remember the Pandemic? Of course you do, we held each other close here for the duration. Do you remember we had to wash our hands for a certain amount of time, 30 seconds or a minute or something. Did anyone else sing a little ditty while washing? Mine was Little Bunny Foo Foo.

In September 2021 when my sister unexpectedly arrived for a visit, she was surprised to learn that I was not "still" washing my hands while singing Happy Birthday to You a prescribed number of times. 
As someone who had long been a hand washer because I worked with germy young people, I did not need to change my handwashing habits for the pandemic.

2 minutes ago, Browncoat said:

I sang "Old MacDonald", with lots of interesting variations on what he had on his farm, such as a COVID patient, with a cough cough here and a cough cough there.  I know, I know, it's a serious, potentially deadly disease, but I do tend to have a bit of a morbid sense of humor.

I do think this👆 would be psychologically helpful!pt-claps.png
But probably singing Happy Birthday was for my sister too. 

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30 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Remember the Pandemic? Of course you do, we held each other close here for the duration. Do you remember we had to wash our hands for a certain amount of time, 30 seconds or a minute or something. Did anyone else sing a little ditty while washing? Mine was Little Bunny Foo Foo.

One positive for me that came out of the pandemic is that I am continuing to wash my hands more regularly - especially after I've been shopping.  I also still use a hand sanitizer as soon as I get back in the car no matter where I've been, I use a lysol wipe on grocery carts and try to keep my distance from others in line ups etc.  It's not a bad way to be, lots of germs out there that I'd prefer to avoid if at all possible!

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3 minutes ago, Laura Holt said:

One positive for me that came out of the pandemic is that I am continuing to wash my hands more regularly - especially after I've been shopping.  I also still use a hand sanitizer as soon as I get back in the car no matter where I've been, I use a lysol wipe on grocery carts and try to keep my distance from others in line ups etc.  It's not a bad way to be, lots of germs out there that I'd prefer to avoid if at all possible!

Yep, we've been using the wipes on our carts ever since they started offering them in the early 2000s.

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1 hour ago, peacheslatour said:

Remember the Pandemic? Of course you do, we held each other close here for the duration. Do you remember we had to wash our hands for a certain amount of time, 30 seconds or a minute or something. Did anyone else sing a little ditty while washing? Mine was Little Bunny Foo Foo.

This had made for a fun Question of the Day. Come on over and let us know!

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1 hour ago, Laura Holt said:

One positive for me that came out of the pandemic is that I am continuing to wash my hands more regularly - especially after I've been shopping.  I also still use a hand sanitizer as soon as I get back in the car no matter where I've been, I use a lysol wipe on grocery carts and try to keep my distance from others in line ups etc.  It's not a bad way to be, lots of germs out there that I'd prefer to avoid if at all possible!

Even before the Pandemic, I was an avid hand washer, to the point my hands were often chapped.  I too always used the wipes provided for shopping carts long before the pandemic. Now on the way out of the store I grab one and wipe my hands down before going to the car where I use a spray on my hands after loading the groceries or what ever I bought. (I am one of the very few people around here that still wears a mask inside wherever I go.) I wash my hands at home after unloading the groceries or whatever, but I am past wiping down each item as I did early in the Pandemic.

I may be considered OCD about it but I have never had Covid, I don't get the flu and seldom have colds. I guess I was blessed with a strong immune system which I augment with all the protocols.

I might add I haven't had a flu shot in 25 or so years and am not vaccinated for Covid. Severe reactions to medications is much more of a problem for me.

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4 hours ago, Gramto6 said:

Even before the Pandemic, I was an avid hand washer, to the point my hands were often chapped.  I too always used the wipes provided for shopping carts long before the pandemic.

Ditto. I still remember a story on the local news about grocery cart handles and paper money having more germs than a toilet seat. <shudder> Now I don't know whether there were scientific studies to back up those conclusions, but I am keenly observant of just how gross some people can be and act accordingly.

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Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

We all have been drawn into off-topic discussions, me included. There's little that's off-topic when it comes to Chit Chat, so the only ask is that you please remember that this is the Chit Chat topic and that there's a subforum for all things health and wellness here.

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