Chit-Chat: What's On Your Mind Today?

[theredhead77]

20 minutes ago, Cloud9Shopper said:

I’m so sick of choir, and if next year is another year like this year, I’m giving it up at the end of next year. Every time I feel like we’re done and going to get a break, our director cancels a night off and calls practice, or there’s just one more thing to add to the schedule. 

Like tonight was supposed to be our last practice and we have two more Masses to sing and then we’re done. As we’re leaving after the director gives the itinerary for the next couple of weeks, one of the members goes “Oh we’re not singing for Father’s Day?” So he decided that’s a good idea and now we have an extra practice in early June that was not on our schedule until tonight. (If you’ve seen The Golden Girls, I really wish I could’ve told that lady “Oh shut up, Rose!”)

I’m not happy. I’m tired of these “around an hour” rehearsals that stretch into an hour and twenty minutes or close to two hours. I’m sick of the same songs and people not getting their parts and needing to run everything into the ground. I’m tired of the extra concerts (which I skip, so I should say I’m sick of hearing about them) and every Mass feeling like we need tons of preparation when the music is not brain surgery. I’ve been in choirs most of my life and just started cantoring a month or two ago and never felt this tired and sick of it. I don’t know why my director takes the suggestion of others in the choir and tacks on an extra practice. It’s so rude. I just want to be done for the summer but it feels like by the time we will be done we’ll have to start right back up again. 

 

You know you can quit, right? Just tell them due to personal circumstances you are no longer able to participate. You don't need to give a reason but if you feel inclined just tell them it's due to time constraints.

Edited May 23, 2023 by theredhead77

[Cloud9Shopper]

I know I can quit but I don’t make good decisions in the heat of the moment (like if I quit now when I’m upset and pissed I could end up regretting it when things settle), and I’m trying to give it a fair chance because last choir year was not like this and I enjoyed it. This year feels like nothing but a slog. So if things are more normal and low-key next year I will stick it out but if this year repeats itself I am done. 

[SuprSuprElevated]

7 hours ago, oliviabenson said:

I started eating oatmeal every day. It’s awful lol. Looks and tastes like puke. 

And I added stuff to it to make it edible. No luck.

 

If you haven't already, try steel cut. It's an entirely different texture to me, and far more palatable than rolled oats. Some fruit & maybe a touch of maple syrup might help.

[nokat]

2 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

We never ate oatmeal growing up (we ate cream of wheat that my Swedish grandma called "gret"). Nowadays I prefer sandwiches for breakfast (grilled cheese, ham & Jalsburg, etc).😊

I ate a lot of cream of wheat as a child. I loved it then but stopped eating it for allergy reasons (the plantain enzyme used in it). I can now eat it so should try it again. 

I love oatmeal but the grey, gelatinous stuff they served in the rehab was less than appetizing. I like the instant oats as I don't mind the texture.

I tend to like leftovers or salad for breakfast, and then cereal or oatmeal for dinner. 

[supposebly]

2 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

(we ate cream of wheat that my Swedish grandma called "gret")

We used to have cream of wheat cooked in milk on Friday evenings (catholic home, no meat and we kids hated fish), poured on a plate and we made faces with jam on it.

Thanks for the reminder. Maybe that's something I should try doing since I've already regressed to some version of my childhood breakfast.

1 hour ago, Cloud9Shopper said:

I just want to be done for the summer but it feels like by the time we will be done we’ll have to start right back up again. 

Maybe you could find another choir if next year doesn't improve?

[Cloud9Shopper]

53 minutes ago, supposebly said:

Maybe you could find another choir if next year doesn't improve?

Yes I could return to the choir at my old church since I live closer to them now and still know people there. 

I hate when things I once enjoyed turn into chores and not-so-fun anymore. Unrelated but I used to love supporting the local minor league hockey team, going to player meet and greets, going on bus trips to see them play at road games. Now I go to a quarter season’s worth of games a year and have scaled back on the “fan club” type of stuff because it was like “been there done that” after a while and lost its novelty, and I don’t even buy team merchandise as much these days. 

[Caoimhe]

I’m not a breakfast person but liked oats a lot before discovering that I feel better without grains in my diet.  I always had a bag of Flahavans in the house.  My husband was force fed porridge growing up and will never touch anything oat-based now. ( He feels the same way about tomato anything, they grew them in the back garden at home and he’d be happy to never see one again.)

Personally if something starts feeling like a chore I tell myself that life is too short and give it up.  Eventually I find something else to do with the time I’ve gained back!

[theredhead77]

3 hours ago, Caoimhe said:

Personally if something starts feeling like a chore I tell myself that life is too short and give it up.  Eventually I find something else to do with the time I’ve gained back!

I'm working on identifying this feeling and finding replacement hobbies. One of the things I find difficult is identifying when friendships run their course, and when activities just don't bring me happiness.

I know I've mentioned that I only extend 2-3 invites and if someone never accepts and doesn't make an effort to say "I can't on date, but I can on Y date", or always comes back with "I have to see what is going on" I consider that someone who isn't interested in hanging out.

I play social sports and I realize I don't have fun playing a sport I'm not good at, even if I do get to meet awesome people who do want to hang out. So I cut my losses and find something new to do. I think I'm going to sign up for pickleball next. 

[PRgal]

I want to play pickleball, but my local club only has sessions during my family's dinner hour.  The club is supposed to be family-friendly, but pickleball seems to cater to the child-free or empty nester crowds.  

[theredhead77]

1 hour ago, PRgal said:

I want to play pickleball, but my local club only has sessions during my family's dinner hour.  The club is supposed to be family-friendly, but pickleball seems to cater to the child-free or empty nester crowds.  

Can you adjust dinner once a week?

[PRgal]

19 minutes ago, theredhead77 said:

Can you adjust dinner once a week?

We only adjust for work-related reasons or things like a high school reunion or other meetings.  We don’t make it a weekly thing since family dinners are precious.  Some day, my son will be involved in many extra-curricular activities and dinners like these won’t be as regular anymore.  

[theredhead77]

1 hour ago, PRgal said:

We only adjust for work-related reasons or things like a high school reunion or other meetings.  We don’t make it a weekly thing since family dinners are precious.  Some day, my son will be involved in many extra-curricular activities and dinners like these won’t be as regular anymore.  

I didn't mean cancel it, just move it an hour or so. You can still have family dinner and also participate in an activity you want to enjoy. 

[PRgal]

8 minutes ago, theredhead77 said:

I didn't mean cancel it, just move it an hour or so. You can still have family dinner and also participate in an activity you want to enjoy. 

My husband is in the office four days a week (Monday to Thursday) and doesn't get home until 6:30.  Pickleball is 6-7 on Tuesdays and/or Thursdays.  My son's bedtime is 7:45.  He's 4 1/2, remember.  So no, I can't move dinner.

[theredhead77]

49 minutes ago, PRgal said:

My husband is in the office four days a week (Monday to Thursday) and doesn't get home until 6:30.  Pickleball is 6-7 on Tuesdays and/or Thursdays.  My son's bedtime is 7:45.  He's 4 1/2, remember.  So no, I can't move dinner.

It was just a question, one I wouldn't have asked if the time the game started was before your husband got home was part of the initial lamenting. It sounded like the game conflicted only with dinner. My apologies. 

[SuprSuprElevated]

[StatisticalOutlier]

The problem I have with dietary recommendations is they don't take into account the individual.  This is from a short article about blood glucose levels and diabetes:

"The huge differences that we found in the rise of blood sugar levels among different people who consumed identical meals highlights why personalized eating choices are more likely to help people stay healthy than universal dietary advice," co-author Eran Segal, with the department of Computer Science and Applied Math at Weizmann, said during a press conference.

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/huge-differences-even-when-people-ate-the-same-foods/

Outlier that I am, I've always had a feeling "universal" advice isn't necessarily all that universal, just from knowing what my personal experience is. 

I cook very very rarely.  Almost all of my meals come from fast casual restaurants (one step up from McDonald's, Jack in the Box, Taco Bell).  I'm not addicted to that food, but I like it and it's easy.  I can make simple stuff at home, like spaghetti, and I even have some dishes I make and have enough to put some in the freezer, and I'll deploy that periodically.  But that's once, maybe twice, a week.  Otherwise, I'm eating out.  If I keep salad at home, it almost always goes bad, or I feel like I have to eat it even if I'm not hungry.

So I should add that I almost always eat once a day, usually in the middle of the afternoon.  Before that, I'm generally not hungry, so I don't eat.

And I wonder if there are others out there who actually don't need food when they first get up but the experts tell them it's the most important meal of the day so they eat it, and how many calories does that add up to over time?  Or worse, eating three meals a day.  I bet if I ate three meals a day I'd be as big as a house, for no reason because I wouldn't be eating because I'm actually hungry.

What I've discovered is that when I'm not forced to eat at certain times, I naturally gravitate to something that has a name--intermittent fasting.  And I realized it by giving my body the freedom to do what it thinks best.

However, I've been able to do that because my eating is my eating.  I've never been responsible for feeding anyone else (and actually can't even fathom the tyranny of having to fee someone three meals a day), and know it's a luxury.

Something else I observed is that when I met Mr. Outlier 25 years ago, I switched from Diet Coke to regular Coke because that's what he drank and it's vastly better than that diet swill (when I taste diet drinks now I honestly can't believe I drank that shit and I think I thought I liked it!).  With the switch to regular Coke I didn't gain any weight at all, and I certainly didn't purposely lower my other calorie intake to make room for it (although I recall that some studies found that people who drink diet drinks DO take in more food calories so maybe it was just a matter of backing off those--who knows).   

Then a few years ago I switched from Sweet'n Low in iced tea to actual sweet tea and I haven't seen any changes due to that, either, which boggles the mind because have you SEEN the bag of sugar they pour into the sweet tea dispenser and the giant whisk they stir it with??  For the last few months I've been drinking about a quart of sweet tea a day (that's what being in the South will do to you), and I know I haven't limited calories in any other way but it's still not making me gain weight. 

I'm not sure what my point is, other than to point out that bodies are complicated, and to encourage people to evaluate advice.  Like warnings to stay away from sugary sodas.  Almost invariably the warning is related to obesity (and diabetes).  But my body has proven that it can handle sugary sodas and sweet tea without becoming obese and developing diabetes.  So does that advice apply to me?

I've probably told this story before, but I had braces on my teeth when I was in my 30s.  I was told, "Don't eat ribs."  I asked, "Why not?"  The lady was taken aback and said nobody had ever asked that before.  (To which I didn't reply, "Because most of your patients are kids and advice like that just goes in one ear and out the other, and even if they heard it they know they're going to ignore it so just let it fly on by, plus asking questions will just make them have to sit in that chair longer.") 

I asked what would happen if I ate ribs--would the bbq sauce react with the braces and cause permanent staining of my teeth or something like that?  She laughed and said, "Oh, no.  You might break a bracket."  So I asked, "What happens if I break a bracket?"  She said, "Then you'll have to come in and get it fixed."

Okay!  That's good information on which to base MY decision whether to eat ribs or not.  And as it happens, I almost never eat ribs anyway, preferring soft fatty brisket, so I didn't really need to know what would happen, but I might be able to apply this information to other braces-related activities.

[meep.meep]

21 hours ago, Cloud9Shopper said:

I know I can quit but I don’t make good decisions in the heat of the moment (like if I quit now when I’m upset and pissed I could end up regretting it when things settle), and I’m trying to give it a fair chance because last choir year was not like this and I enjoyed it. This year feels like nothing but a slog. So if things are more normal and low-key next year I will stick it out but if this year repeats itself I am done. 

You don't have to quit to try to make changes.  If rehearsals are supposed to be an hour, prepare to leave at the end of the hour.  If somehow new performances are added, ask if you can vote on whether the choir should do them.  Sit down with the director and explain that things have changed since last year and you're thinking seriously about quitting.

You're the only one who can make you a doormat.  As Ann Landers used to say.

[supposebly]

5 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

So I should add that I almost always eat once a day, usually in the middle of the afternoon.  Before that, I'm generally not hungry, so I don't eat.

I'm the opposite, I need to eat something about every 4 hours, sometimes more often. When I don't do that, I get headaches, sometimes my hands are shaking, and I get stomach pain. Or the next time I eat, I might overeat because I feel utterly starved. I also get quite irritated and short-tempered when I don't eat three times a day. Eating just once a day would turn me into the hulk and you wouldn't like me when I'm hangry! 

I agree, not every size fits all. But I also think that not everyone can handle the amounts of sugar in soda or ice tea on a daily basis and not get addicted to it. It's not an issue for me, I was never too fond of sweets and I wouldn't like it. The only coke in my fridge is as a remedy for migraines. Diet coke would actually do the opposite.

Eating once a day is probably on the extreme end of intermittent fasting which doesn't work for me. But, everyone's metabolism is different. What I do know is that things changed over time for me. I used to eat once or twice a day during my 20s and early 30s, but that doesn't work for me anymore.

Edited May 24, 2023 by supposebly

[Kitty Redstone]

On 5/22/2023 at 8:06 PM, peacheslatour said:

I loved Cream of Wheat! I haven't had since I was a kid. I used to put butter and brown sugar on it.

Same here! It was so great on a cold day. White rice with raisins, butter, sugar and a splash of milk was another favorite. A box of instant rice and golden raisins are going on the shopping list right now.

Peaches, didn't you used to watch Y&R and post in that forum?

[kristen111]

I am upset and need an opinion.  I love animals and have had animals when my kids were in the house, and treated them good.  The guy next door to me (single) goes to work at 7 am and his cute little dog barks for about half an hour.  He gets home about 5:30 from work.  I don’t care about the barking, but the dog must be lonely all day by himself .. right?  Is that how it goes that people leave a dog all by itself for the whole day?  Of course I can’t say anything as it’s not my business, but I’m afraid the little dog will go batty.  Do I say anything to the neighbor, or just mind my business?  He’s a nice guy, treats the dog good when he’s home.  Is this the norm?  Maybe I’m going batty.  I just hate when animals are not happy.  Cats sleep all day.  I was home when we had dogs.  

[oliviabenson]

1 hour ago, kristen111 said:

I am upset and need an opinion.  I love animals and have had animals when my kids were in the house, and treated them good.  The guy next door to me (single) goes to work at 7 am and his cute little dog barks for about half an hour.  He gets home about 5:30 from work.  I don’t care about the barking, but the dog must be lonely all day by himself .. right?  Is that how it goes that people leave a dog all by itself for the whole day?  Of course I can’t say anything as it’s not my business, but I’m afraid the little dog will go batty.  Do I say anything to the neighbor, or just mind my business?  He’s a nice guy, treats the dog good when he’s home.  Is this the norm?  Maybe I’m going batty.  I just hate when animals are not happy.  Cats sleep all day.  I was home when we had dogs.  

Nice to see you back! 

[JTMacc99]

1 hour ago, kristen111 said:

but the dog must be lonely all day by himself?

It depends on the dog, but generally speaking, no, the dog is fine as long as he gets his social and exercise needs when the owner is home in the morning and evening. (However Dog parent guilt, or in your case Dog neighbor, about leaving a dog home alone is real.) The half hour of barking in the morning does sound like a little bit of separation anxiety.

Again, generally speaking, you wouldn't want to leave a puppy or an elderly dog alone for 10 hours because they don't have the bladder control. Puppies also need more interaction because, well, they're puppies. And if the specific dog has a need for a lot of exercise and/or a job (like a border collie), that dog will let the owner know that it's bored during the day. 

Meaning, the owner will come home and find the couch destroyed because the dog gave himself something to do. If your neighbor's dog was unhappy during the day, your neighbor would already know about it. 

Dogs are also naturally active at dawn and dusk, so the middle of the day is snooze time. When people get another dog because "the first one looks lonely", they end up with two dogs sleeping all day while they're at work.

Little dogs, the toy breeds but less so the terriers, are couch potatoes by nature. So they're almost definitely fine to leave alone during the day. I saw a cute thing the other day where a person put a Fitbit on her dog to see what he's up to during the day. When she synced up the Fitbit when she got home from work, the dog took a grand total of 33 steps during the day.

[kristen111]

1 hour ago, oliviabenson said:

Nice to see you back! 

Thank you Olivia.  I may not post, but I do read almost everyday.  Plus, I’m on lots of Housewives threads which take time.

[peacheslatour]

11 hours ago, Kitty Redstone said:

Same here! It was so great on a cold day. White rice with raisins, butter, sugar and a splash of milk was another favorite. A box of instant rice and golden raisins are going on the shopping list right now.

Peaches, didn't you used to watch Y&R and post in that forum?

I did but since I don't watch the show anymore, I feel I have little to contribute.

[Kitty Redstone]

Same. I go back and forth on watching, depending on time and tolerance level for stupid storytelling, but still read for the brilliant commentators there.

[oliviabenson]

I think I saw the video where the dog took 33 steps lol

A bulldog? 
 

Good use for the Fitbit !

[peacheslatour]

1 hour ago, Kitty Redstone said:

Same. I go back and forth on watching, depending on time and tolerance level for stupid storytelling, but still read for the brilliant commentators there.

I do like to do that too and I miss everybody there so much. 

[stewedsquash]

 

Update on the four cows I was bottle feeding. While they do still stay in pairs they have integrated into the herd. They also still recognize me and come over in pairs wanting a bottle. My oldest son’s three daughters were on the large hay bale surrounded by all the cows. The middle 6 year old is telling my husband to “just throw me on one!” after getting almost on one from the bale as she desperately wants to ride cows. Last week she was on the tractor with him unloading the bales and begging “please please let me get on one” then “just open the door and let me jump on one”. 

Edited May 26, 2023 by stewedsquash

[kristen111]

4 hours ago, JTMacc99 said:

Little dogs, the toy breeds but less so the terriers, are couch potatoes by nature. So they're almost definitely fine to leave alone during the day. I saw a cute thing the other day where a person put a Fitbit on her dog to see what he's up to during the day. When she synced up the Fitbit when she got home from work, the dog took a grand total of 33 steps during the day.

Thank you.  I feel better now.

[Bethany]

In the last few days I've noticed FB keeps making suggestions to me about groups I might like to join.  Some of them do seem to be potentially interesting but in almost all cases they say things like "two posts a day".   Why would anyone bother to join a group that sees so little activity?  Those sound like groups that are probably going to get closed sooner rather than later.

[Kitty Redstone]

3 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

I do like to do that too and I miss everybody there so much. 

You should come back! There's a few of us there who aren't watching. I like to cheer on the lovely people who have more fortitude than I do, lol, and who bless us with their hilarious analyses and recaps.

[peacheslatour]

29 minutes ago, Kitty Redstone said:

You should come back! There's a few of us there who aren't watching. I like to cheer on the lovely people who have more fortitude than I do, lol, and who bless us with their hilarious analyses and recaps.

Thank you, I shall try but I feel like I've missed too much.

[athousandclowns]

8 hours ago, JTMacc99 said:

It depends on the dog, but generally speaking, no, the dog is fine as long as he gets his social and exercise needs when the owner is home in the morning and evening. (However Dog parent guilt, or in your case Dog neighbor, about leaving a dog home alone is real.) The half hour of barking in the morning does sound like a little bit of separation anxiety.

Again, generally speaking, you wouldn't want to leave a puppy or an elderly dog alone for 10 hours because they don't have the bladder control. Puppies also need more interaction because, well, they're puppies. And if the specific dog has a need for a lot of exercise and/or a job (like a border collie), that dog will let the owner know that it's bored during the day. 

Meaning, the owner will come home and find the couch destroyed because the dog gave himself something to do. If your neighbor's dog was unhappy during the day, your neighbor would already know about it. 

Dogs are also naturally active at dawn and dusk, so the middle of the day is snooze time. When people get another dog because "the first one looks lonely", they end up with two dogs sleeping all day while they're at work.

Little dogs, the toy breeds but less so the terriers, are couch potatoes by nature. So they're almost definitely fine to leave alone during the day. I saw a cute thing the other day where a person put a Fitbit on her dog to see what he's up to during the day. When she synced up the Fitbit when she got home from work, the dog took a grand total of 33 steps during the day.

Thanks for that info on dogs activity. I adopted a shelter dog ( 13=lb chihuahua + dachshund)  that first was noted as 6 years but on discharge says 3 years. I had him a couple days and  i was sick for a month and in the hospital for 5 days and add the storms during those weeks we’ve had everything going against us. He still will not come to me or let me approach him yet goes room to room with me and sleeps right up next to me.   I’ve only  seen his tail wag twice both times when he was sleeping.  I’ve been really concerned the last three days because he’s always been food obsessed and wolfs his food in seconds but he’s been leaving meals for hours and even over night.  

Edited May 24, 2023 by athousandclowns
Typo

[Anela]

47 minutes ago, athousandclowns said:

Thanks for that info on dogs activity. I adopted a shelter dog ( 13=lb chihuahua + dachshund)  that first was noted as 6 years but on discharge says 3 years. I had him a couple days and  i was sick for a month and in the hospital for 5 days and add the storms during those weeks we’ve had everything going against us. He still will not come to me or let me approach him yet goes room to room with me and sleeps right up next to me.   I’ve only  seen his tail wag twice both times when he was sleeping.  I’ve been really concerned the last three days because he’s always been food obsessed and wolfs his food in seconds but he’s been leaving meals for hours and even over night.  

My little cat that died a few months ago, came to me as a feral kitten. He would watch everyone from the sidelines, and occasionally grab me with his claws, only to run when I tried to pet him. He wanted me to, but was scared. It took him something like seventeen months to crawl into my lap one night, and really trust me. 

Those posts weren't supposed to merge. 

[PRgal]

1 hour ago, athousandclowns said:

Thanks for that info on dogs activity. I adopted a shelter dog ( 13=lb chihuahua + dachshund)  that first was noted as 6 years but on discharge says 3 years. I had him a couple days and  i was sick for a month and in the hospital for 5 days and add the storms during those weeks we’ve had everything going against us. He still will not come to me or let me approach him yet goes room to room with me and sleeps right up next to me.   I’ve only  seen his tail wag twice both times when he was sleeping.  I’ve been really concerned the last three days because he’s always been food obsessed and wolfs his food in seconds but he’s been leaving meals for hours and even over night.  

Sounds like he experienced some trauma in his previous home too.  Many hugs to you and your pup.  Is there such a thing as doggy therapy?

[EtheltoTillie]

6 minutes ago, PRgal said:

Sounds like he experienced some trauma in his previous home too.  Many hugs to you and your pup.  Is there such a thing as doggy therapy?

There really area all kinds of therapy for a troubled dog.  Some dogs benefit from medication.  My dog is on Prozac to reduce anxiety.  Also you can teach dogs slowly to be accustomed to new places and people.  It can involve "high value" treats, such as hotdog pieces and cheese, and for my dog, CHICKEN!

[RealHousewife]

Does anyone know what this guy could be up to?

There's a young man who's rang the doorbell of my parents house twice. Once was in the late afternoon, and then he came back a few hours later. Just walking, no vehicle. He doesn't even wait for them to answer though, he just walks away. My parents have cameras. They showed me the footage, and it looks like he's entering stuff into his phone as he's approaching the house. They called one of the neighbors to see if he rang her doorbell as well, but he hadn't. 

[roseha]

Sounds suspicious, could he be planning a robbery and looking to see if people are home?

[RealHousewife]

25 minutes ago, roseha said:

Sounds suspicious, could he be planning a robbery and looking to see if people are home?

That's what I wonder. My sister was visiting during the second time, and her car was parked outside. You'd think he'd know the house has at least one person in it. My parents are good about keeping the doors locked and alarm system on, but it's still unsettling. 

Edited May 25, 2023 by RealHousewife

[theredhead77]

51 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

Does anyone know what this guy could be up to?

There's a young man who's rang the doorbell of my parents house twice. Once was in the late afternoon, and then he came back a few hours later. Just walking, no vehicle. He doesn't even wait for them to answer though, he just walks away. My parents have cameras. They showed me the footage, and it looks like he's entering stuff into his phone as he's approaching the house. They called one of the neighbors to see if he rang her doorbell as well, but he hadn't. 

How long does he wait at the door? So many non-nefarious reasons come to mind. He could be texting, emailing, using a map program, someone who is lost, a process server, Ed McMahon reincarnated with the Publishers Clearinghouse winnings.

[RealHousewife]

1 minute ago, theredhead77 said:

How long does he wait at the door? So many non-nefarious reasons come to mind. He could be texting, emailing, using a map program, someone who is lost, a process server, Ed McMahon reincarnated with the Publishers Clearinghouse winnings.

lol yeah there are many non-nefarious reasons. It's just odd that he doesn't even wait. You'd think if it were important enough for him to come to the house twice, he'd at least wait to see if someone will answer. 

[Bastet]

2 hours ago, theredhead77 said:

So many non-nefarious reasons come to mind.

And so many more of those reasons than criminal in any given vague context such as this, especially if the wait before leaving after knocking/ringing is a short one for someone who's trudging through the neighborhood for any number of harmless (maybe annoying, but harmless) reasons -- which do not require going to every single door, period, let alone in one trip.  I'm all for being cautious, I'm just also so simultaneously infuriated and exhausted by fear-mongering by cops and social media posters I always encourage people not to automatically reach for suspicion without good reason.

[Bethany]

10 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

lol yeah there are many non-nefarious reasons. It's just odd that he doesn't even wait. You'd think if it were important enough for him to come to the house twice, he'd at least wait to see if someone will answer. 

This is the only reason I'd be a little more concerned.  Usually in my neighbourhood  a stranger coming to the door is someone selling something - chocolate bars for school, new siding, religion - whatever.  But they don't tend to choose only one house and then move on.  

[partofme]

12 hours ago, Bastet said:

I'm all for being cautious, I'm just also so simultaneously infuriated and exhausted by fear-mongering by cops and social media posters I always encourage people not to automatically reach for suspicion without good reason.

I watch a lot of true crime and am paranoid by nature, but I've heard too many stories on the news about people being shot because they rang the wrong doorbell. 

[oliviabenson]

I almost went to a filming of a restaurant renovation show … changed my mind because I wasn’t sure where it was.

Well it was a show featuring Gordon Ramsay!!! Now I’m mad I didn’t go.

I am a huge fan of Gordon. 

Edited May 26, 2023 by oliviabenson

[peacheslatour]

2 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

I almost went to a filming of a restaurant renovation show … changed my mind because I wasn’t sure where it was.

Well it was a show featuring Gordon Ramsay!!! Now I’m mad I didn’t go.

I am a huge fan of Gordon. 

Oh no! That would have been so cool. I'm sorry you missed out.

[annzeepark914]

9 minutes ago, oliviabenson said:

I almost went to a filming of a restaurant renovation show … changed my mind because I wasn’t sure where it was.

Well it was a show featuring Gordon Ramsay!!! Now I’m mad I didn’t go.

I am a huge fan of Gordon. 

That's too bad. It would've been fun to see the show bring produced. 

[Anela]

On 5/25/2023 at 2:50 PM, partofme said:

I watch a lot of true crime and am paranoid by nature, but I've heard too many stories on the news about people being shot because they rang the wrong doorbell. 

We just had a young guy knocking on the door, and when I looked outside, I thought he was lucky that it was my dad opening the door to him. I think the people right here in our neighbourhood are okay, but I've seen a lot of posts from people posting someone's picture, wondering what they were up to. Some people telling them to call the police, followed by "I did." 

The guy is twenty years old, and wants to run for councilman in our district, so he was asking for signatures. If I'd known, I'd have gone out and signed, too. 

[theredhead77]

42 minutes ago, Anela said:

We just had a young guy knocking on the door, and when I looked outside, I thought he was lucky that it was my dad opening the door to him. I think the people right here in our neighbourhood are okay, but I've seen a lot of posts from people posting someone's picture, wondering what they were up to. Some people telling them to call the police, followed by "I did." 

God, I hated Nextdoor, and the Ring [camera] community. A bunch of paranoid busy-bodies who don't seem to grasp calling the cops on someone is a great way for that person (or sometimes, the person calling) to end up dead.

42 minutes ago, Anela said:

The guy is twenty years old, and wants to run for councilman in our district, so he was asking for signatures. If I'd known, I'd have gone out and signed, too. 

Oh, thats amazing! More 20somethings need to get involved! Hopefully, you can find out where he is and go sign or otherwise provide support.

Edited May 26, 2023 by theredhead77

[annzeepark914]

Any good person knocking on doors today is mighty brave.