S14.E16: Are You In, or Are You Out?

[essexjan]

On 4/29/2022 at 1:54 AM, StatisticalOutlier said:

Millennials are embracing lab-grown diamonds because of concerns about mined diamonds' human and environmental toll.  However, DeBeers is not going to go down without a fight.  It'll be interesting to see how they approach it, since they have a successful track record; after all, they're the ones who created the whole "tradition" of diamond engagement rings in the first place.

https://www.theatlantic.com/international/archive/2015/02/how-an-ad-campaign-invented-the-diamond-engagement-ring/385376/

 

Yes, and a lab-grown diamond is indistinguishable from a natural diamond, made from carbon. It's not like cubic zirconia, which is totally different. A good lab-grown diamond is expensive - a 1.5ct F-clarity lab-created diamond at James Allen is about $5,000, not including the ring setting.

[mythoughtis]

1 hour ago, essexjan said:

Yes, and a lab-grown diamond is indistinguishable from a natural diamond, made from carbon. It's not like cubic zirconia, which is totally different. A good lab-grown diamond is expensive - a 1.5ct F-clarity lab-created diamond at James Allen is about $5,000, not including the ring setting.

So do we think he actually bought this ring, or did he just go through the motions of showing it and keep it in the cart for after decision day?  Seems a little crazy to order it before she says yes on decision day. 

[Jax7917]

On 4/27/2022 at 8:27 PM, mythoughtis said:

Especially if she isn’t willing to try a kiss or more.  They are so busy friend zoning each other that they don’t even attempt a kiss to see what would happen 

Sorry  Jon - Just because Lindsey is willing to help clean out the house does not mean she’s the right person for Mark 

I was thinking the same . Sometimes you need to just go For it and kiss each other or just have sex and maybe it’ll bring those feelings . Unlike in the beginning , they seem to really get along now and like each other but Jasminas not looking past physical attraction and he’s not a bad looking guy at all . Just be romantic and maybe you’ll feel romantic . They don’t even hold hands or touch . 

[Blissfool]

On 4/28/2022 at 7:20 AM, Cancun said:

 

This image is hilarious, especially because of his very serious face.

Next week he'll be saying, "I was testing my wife. Checking to see if she knew was a carafe was. As you can see, she doesn't."

By the way, did anyone notice that when Lindsey and Olajuwon were talking, he paused a little too long before saying Katina's name, as if he had trouble remembering it?

On 4/28/2022 at 8:52 AM, seacliffsal said:

 

I think that in this episode it solidified for me that Mark really should have been rejected again for this show.  There's a reason he didn't make it the first time he applied and I doubt that he changed anything since then.  The fact that he wanted them to move into his mother's apartment and keep things the same even though he admitted he doesn't have much of a relationship with her and that he had an unhappy childhood, would have sent me running at that moment.  I was with Lindsey in that I would want to build our lives together moving forward instead of reliving his past.  

I bet he wants to move into his mom's house because it's already paid for---no mortgage!

On 4/29/2022 at 12:50 PM, rebel2u said:

Yuck!

How come there's no emoji here for "gross"  ?

😝🤢🤮

These might work!

[qtpye]

7 hours ago, mythoughtis said:

So do we think he actually bought this ring, or did he just go through the motions of showing it and keep it in the cart for after decision day?  Seems a little crazy to order it before she says yes on decision day. 

I wonder if the diamond ring is maybe a clue that they stay together and the drama about his job might just be for the show.

Noi might not be giving up her apartment because he will be moving in since he now lives in a van.

[ChiMama]

17 hours ago, Vanderboom said:

I've watched some of the earlier seasons on Netflix and Hulu, and the vibe is very different. I think there's too much Production Manipulation that makes this show less enjoyable.

The other differences are the whole group dynamic and the show-provided apartments. In earlier seasons, the couples never met or interacted and after the honeymoon each couple had to move into one of their homes and discuss budgets, etc. The group just causes drama and the free rent forestalls serious discussion about lifestyle & spending that needs to be covered sooner than later.

Plus, now there’s the “whole victim of its own success” factor — with the show’s popularity it attracts soulless famewhores just interested in being on tv and ‘building their brand’ on social media. 

Edited May 1, 2022 by ChiMama

[Elizzikra]

Quote

So do we think he actually bought this ring, or did he just go through the motions of showing it and keep it in the cart for after decision day?  Seems a little crazy to order it before she says yes on decision day. 

I was thinking he would propose with it on Decision Day.

Quote

I bet he wants to move into his mom's house because it's already paid for---no mortgage!

To me, that would be the BEST reason to live there whether it's either of their style or not. Housing is most people's biggest expense. If you have no rent/mortgage or a low one, that makes life a lot easier. And frees up money to redecorate...

[Madding crowd]

Lindsey only suggested a few changes, paint and new curtains etc. I don’t think I could live in someone’s house as a wife knowing nothing of my taste or personality would be in my home. When my husband and I were first getting serious his mother was looking to move. He suggested buying a house where he and his mother would live until we got married. I said no because I knew I would be moving into a house decorated by her and it would have nothing of me. Luckily she found a condo and my husband and I bought a house together.

[Boo Boo]

Am I the only one that doesn't have a problem with any of the married couples living separately after this and actually dating after this?  One of the things MTS said that was interesting:  they way this all goes down, you don't get to miss your partner like you do when you date someone.

[Yeah No]

I don't remember seeing this mentioned, but in this episode it looked like Mark was eating sushi willingly and thanking Lindsey for helping him to branch out into new foods.  I got an argument weeks ago when I said that he was a big boy and if he didn't like sushi he could have ordered something else.  Not to say I was right or anything but it looks like he was eating it willingly and has actually come around to liking some of it.  😛

[Kira53]

On 4/29/2022 at 12:12 PM, seacliffsal said:

Olaj has mentioned student loans several times, so I wonder if Katina is funding her lifestyle with student loans and he envisions years of paying off the loans as she has years of education ahead if she really wants to be a nurse.  Yes, I know Katina works (and from home as Olaj reminds us...) but she may still be funding a lot of things with student loans.

Good point. There may be more school loans than we might expect for less than 2 years accomplished in college.  It's a lot to take on impacting a marriage after only 8 weeks of knowing someone.  He did ask for someone that was at his stage of life - finished college and has a career and ready and able to travel.  They are at different stages of life.  People don't like him pointing that out.

[Empress1]

On 5/1/2022 at 12:47 AM, ChiMama said:

The other differences are the whole group dynamic and the show-provided apartments. In earlier seasons, the couples never met or interacted and after the honeymoon each couple had to move into one of their homes and discuss budgets, etc. The group just causes drama and the free rent forestalls serious discussion about lifestyle & spending that needs to be covered sooner than later.

I’ve always said that the show got worse when they started providing housing. Before they had to find and pay for their own housing or live in one person’s or the other’s. If they found separate housing they had to do a budget because they still had to pay for the housing they were living in before marriage, which grounded the marriages more. We would see them doing budgets, talking about they’d incomes, debt, etc. We see much less of that now and I think the show is worse for it.

I don’t mind that the couples interact (sometimes they develop friendships, which is nice to see), but the free housing, especially the “everyone lives in the same place” free housing (in Philly they provided housing but it was in all different neighborhoods) has made the show worse.

[Elizzikra]

Quote

They are at different stages of life.  People don't like him pointing that out.

I don't mind him pointing it out; I think it would be foolish to ignore it. But I don't like how superior he is about where he is. He prioritized things differently earlier in life than she did. Fine. It doesn't make him a better person or a better spouse.

[rebel2u]

On 5/1/2022 at 12:46 AM, qtpye said:

Noi might not be giving up her apartment because he will be moving in since he now lives in a van.

The only thing that would make this better is if he lived in his van down by the river.

[mythoughtis]

1 hour ago, Empress1 said:

If they found separate housing they had to do a budget because they still had to pay for the housing they were living in before marriage, which grounded the marriages more. We would see them doing budgets, talking about they’d incomes, debt, etc. We see much less of that now and I think the show is worse for it.

 

They could still have them do a budget as part of their ‘homework’ rather than have an entire show  devoted to sex toys.  The entire group  could be  shown meeting with a financial counselor of some sort, and then individually  discussing.    Especially people of this season’s age.  They know what their monthly expenses are and could estimate  how they would now change ( bigger home, two cars, insurance etc).  They wouldn’t have to discuss specific amounts on tv. 
That would lead into discussion of differences in lifestyles( home vs apartment, hobbies, etc).  

Edited May 2, 2022 by mythoughtis

[Elizzikra]

38 minutes ago, mythoughtis said:

They could still have them do a budget as part of their ‘homework’ rather than have an entire show  devoted to sex toys.  The entire group  could be  shown meeting with a financial counselor of some sort, and then individually  discussing.    Especially people of this season’s age.  They know what their monthly expenses are and could estimate  how they would now change ( bigger home, two cars, insurance etc).  They wouldn’t have to discuss specific amounts on tv. 
That would lead into discussion of differences in lifestyles( home vs apartment, hobbies, etc).  

I think meetings with a financial planner would be a great episode! I can see that people don’t want the intimate details of their finances broadcast to the entire viewing audience (though they seem to be comfortable discussing everything else) but I think it could be done so that we see the interesting discussions about spending v. saving without actually hearing salaries, savings numbers, etc.

[Empress1]

24 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

I think meetings with a financial planner would be a great episode! I can see that people don’t want the intimate details of their finances broadcast to the entire viewing audience (though they seem to be comfortable discussing everything else) but I think it could be done so that we see the interesting discussions about spending v. saving without actually hearing salaries, savings numbers, etc.

I agree. Money matters. You should know early on if your spouse has a different approach to money than you - could be a deal-breaker.

[Kiss my mutt]

They could trade Vivianna in for a financial planner-or really any of them since this is the number one reason for divorce. 

[Ilovepie]

On 4/27/2022 at 10:42 PM, GettingGray said:

After watching all the episodes of this season, so far, I asked myself why I have not really enjoyed this season.  My answer is that I really only like two of the people, Steve and Mike.  The rest I don't care for.

I would add Chris if he was still there, but you have just summed up the problem - too many assholes. This show is best when there is ONE villain. When everyone is unlikable, it's insufferable. And most of these people are unlikable.

[Emma Snyder]

On 4/28/2022 at 1:55 PM, Elizzikra said:

He's in software sales; I don't think he is a web designer.

According to this he developed an app and worked as a software developer. So not actually a web designer, but his IT experience is more than sales.

20 hours ago, Elizzikra said:

Quote

They are at different stages of life.  People don't like him pointing that out.

I don't mind him pointing it out; I think it would be foolish to ignore it. But I don't like how superior he is about where he is. He prioritized things differently earlier in life than she did. Fine. It doesn't make him a better person or a better spouse.

Was it ever pointed out whether they are the same age? 

[Yeah No]

26 minutes ago, Emma Snyder said:

Was it ever pointed out whether they are the same age? 

I think Steve is 5 years older than she is.  He's supposed to be 38 and she's 33.

I don't like how superior he acts either but on the other hand it doesn't help that Noi often acts like a child.

I like the idea of the couples meeting with a financial planner, but nothing that used to be taken somewhat seriously on this show is taken seriously anymore.  They'd find a way to make it stupid like everything else.  The closest thing to "financial planning" we've had in recent seasons was José and his ridiculous whiteboard.  🙄

[Emma Snyder]

37 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

1 hour ago, Emma Snyder said:

Was it ever pointed out whether they are the same age? 

I think Steve is 5 years older than she is.  He's supposed to be 38 and she's 33.

My question was regarding a post about Olajuwon & Katina.

[Yeah No]

45 minutes ago, Emma Snyder said:

My question was regarding a post about Olajuwon & Katina.

Oops, sorry that wasn't apparent from the context of the post.

The rest of your post was about Noi and Steve so I assumed that was about them too....

[Empress1]

3 hours ago, Emma Snyder said:

My question was regarding a post about Olajuwon & Katina.

I think they are around the same age (30, I think - at least I’m pretty sure Katina is 30).

[Emma Snyder]

7 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

I think they are around the same age (30, I think - at least I’m pretty sure Katina is 30).

Oh ok...since they do seem to be at different places in their lives, I was curious if it could have been an age thing, but I guess not.

[Sox03]

Is anyone watching that are local to the Boston area?

After last week with O going on and on about his upbringing in The Hood, the ghetto, the projects -I decided to find out where he’s from. He grew up in Milton, a fairly nice middle class town and then played football at Framingham State, where I went.

Is anyone else here from the Boston area? Is this story completely ludicrous? Is there a piece missing from his story? Did he live somewhere before Milton?

I also saw that Michael is from Hyde Park, my old neighborhood. Interesting.

[Allison1]

On 5/3/2022 at 8:01 AM, Yeah No said:

I think Steve is 5 years older than she is.  He's supposed to be 38 and she's 33.

I don't like how superior he acts either but on the other hand it doesn't help that Noi often acts like a child.

I like the idea of the couples meeting with a financial planner, but nothing that used to be taken somewhat seriously on this show is taken seriously anymore.  They'd find a way to make it stupid like everything else.  The closest thing to "financial planning" we've had in recent seasons was José and his ridiculous whiteboard.  🙄

Yeah, why DON'T they have them meet with a financial planner (and some other real experts)?    No drama?   (And yeah, that whiteboard was ridiculous.  LOL!)

[Kimboweena]

Well, we know how old Jasmine is, as she's always wearing that "1991" necklace  Assuming that's her birth year.  And Lyndsey always wears an anchor necklace. And blue swirly earrings she wears pretty often.  I am a jewelry nut, so I notice these things. 😄 ❤️💍

[antfitz]

On 4/30/2022 at 11:16 PM, Blissfool said:

This image is hilarious, especially because of his very serious face.

Next week he'll be saying, "I was testing my wife. Checking to see if she knew was a carafe was. As you can see, she doesn't."

By the way, did anyone notice that when Lindsey and Olajuwon were talking, he paused a little too long before saying Katina's name, as if he had trouble remembering it?

I bet he wants to move into his mom's house because it's already paid for---no mortgage!

😝🤢🤮

These might work!

 Is his mom still alive? If so, that would be horrible. No way.

Anyone see Paige tonight?  She was always pretty,  but she slimmed down and looks fabulous!

[Blissfool]

3 minutes ago, antfitz said:

 Is his mom still alive? If so, that would be horrible. No way.

Isn't she in a nursing home?

[OFDgal]

On 5/3/2022 at 6:39 PM, Sox03 said:

Is anyone watching that are local to the Boston area?

After last week with O going on and on about his upbringing in The Hood, the ghetto, the projects -I decided to find out where he’s from. He grew up in Milton, a fairly nice middle class town and then played football at Framingham State, where I went.

Is anyone else here from the Boston area? Is this story completely ludicrous? Is there a piece missing from his story? Did he live somewhere before Milton?

I also saw that Michael is from Hyde Park, my old neighborhood. Interesting.

I live in South Dorchester which shares a border with Milton.  Most of Milton is very affluent.  I think that O was showing K Allston/Brighton public housing.   If his family made the move from the projects to Milton, that is a huge accomplishment.  

[Sycophant4Lease]

16 hours ago, antfitz said:

 Is his mom still alive? If so, that would be horrible. No way.

Anyone see Paige tonight?  She was always pretty,  but she slimmed down and looks fabulous!

Yes. I mentioned to my wife that Paige looked slimmer.  Of course, being a lady my wife said, "Yes.  She DID lose some weight.  But she's wearing TOO much makeup.".

We men will ALWAYS check out the face and body.  You ladies will ALWAYS check out the entire package.  LOL

[Emma Snyder]

On 5/4/2022 at 4:35 PM, Kimboweena said:

Lyndsey always wears an anchor necklace.

She also always wears a green lacy top during her talking heads. Either she really loves that top or the THs are filmed all at once.

[Lindz]

Old man Mark gets "injured" during the game. How unfortunate. 😅 He & his friend have not aged well. Then everyone said their final words. So weird. Like, everyone be cool. Don't destroy the friend group. Kat said [the experts chose them because] they're not too damaged. YIKES! That's debatable, but also, do they have what it takes to build a successful marriage & will they? That's the question & quite a few didn't meet that criteria. All of them were lacking.

[Lindz]

What O means by "life experience" is cooking & cleaning. He LIED when he said he was over it. I can't believe he's still saying that ish! 

[Lindz]

Ugh. SHUT UP NOI!!! Steve isn't keeping score! He said he wants to be able to ask for what he wants just like she is. It is weird that he wants to split chores when he's not working, so how difficult is it for her to say that??? Him saying he would've eaten the noodles & not said anything was the perfect time for her to say how she should've acted & what she should've done, but no. She should've clearly stated what working situation would've made her happy, cooked his food with care & not made herself upset, stayed and discussed her feelings instead of walk out & post on sm...

[JenE4]

On 5/1/2022 at 12:16 AM, Blissfool said:

This image is hilarious, especially because of his very serious face.

Next week he'll be saying, "I was testing my wife. Checking to see if she knew was a carafe was. As you can see, she doesn't."

By the way, did anyone notice that when Lindsey and Olajuwon were talking, he paused a little too long before saying Katina's name, as if he had trouble remembering it?

I bet he wants to move into his mom's house because it's already paid for---no mortgage!

😝🤢🤮

These might work!

There’s no way in hell that either Olajuwon or Katina would even come close to naming the word carafe! This is the couple who readily agreed that a gondola was a ganjala and an alpaca was a gazoo!

[love2lovebadtv]

On 4/27/2022 at 8:44 PM, kristen111 said:

Lindsey likes to help people, then hold it against them and expect things back tenfold.  There’s always payback.  She expects it.

She loves going on and on about how much she helps Mark. We 

On 4/27/2022 at 9:05 PM, rebel2u said:

Uh oh--Katina has found a way to reconcile O's controlling ways.  She's grateful for the way he treats her. She's learning a lot from him!  It's instructional!   I say it's bad news.

Without her heavy make up, Katina looks tired and washed out.

Katina is definitely tired! And she has certain features - ill-fitting wig, bags under her eyes (that's simply a facial feature she has) that make it so much more obvious. 

On 4/28/2022 at 8:34 AM, Ms.C. said:

Not many comments   It’s a strange group IMO   I sort of wish Katina had been matched with Michael because he’s so genuine and accepting and I think he’d really support Katina’s efforts and plans for herself   Maybe after r the divorces, Mike and Katina will get together   Why not?   I think Lindsey and Mark will stay together and work out fine    Like last week, Steve is too good for Noi   Enough said    

I don't think anyone will respond to this but I'm curious what would make Katina and Michael a good match. He's nice but I think Katina likes higher energy. 

On 4/28/2022 at 11:34 AM, Retired at last said:

I continue to dislike Noi more and more, which I didn't think was possible. Maybe because I liked her at the beginning. She seems to be be as dumb as a rock, totally inarticulate, immature, spoiled, and inflexible. Like many of you, I have no idea why she was picked and matched. The fact that she says she STILL doesn't understand what he does is ridiculous. Steve keeps saying that they have discussed this before. She needs to go live by herself, but I think they will say yes, with her thinking that she can live apart from him and he will be thinking that once he gives her a real ring, purchased by him instead of the show, she will be committed. (By the way, if it is a lab created stone, although she is stupid, she will be smart enough to have appraised.)

At the beginning of the season, I thought that both Jasmeana and Katina were really pretty. Katina now looks just hard and is not pretty to me, at all. Jasmeana is still pretty, but she has yet to get her make-up messed up, so she looks the same as the wedding. I just kept hoping they would just kiss at the end to say good-bye, but, nope. I've gotta say, though, her shoes she wore for salsa were amazing! I truly want Katina to say no, but I have a feeling she may think that he is the best she can find, because she has no self-esteem and he is so horrible to her. Why they selected someone with a history of being in abusive relationships is horrible and they should be sued to pay for her therapy. He is a narcissistic misogynist and I want him to go away and never darken my screen again. I DON'T want to see any of these people show up on next season's filler shows giving their opinions.

Jasmina is stunning and has gorgeous skin and hair. I've seen pictures of her with heavy makeup and it's not the same look she has on the show. 

I like Katina but she has always looked hard to me, particularly because of the outfits she wears and her helmet wig. 

I liked Noi at first but now I can't stand her. I think she was chosen for ethnic representation and her traumatic childhood. She's so rigid. But what's wrong with the ring? Lots of people wear lab-created stones and moissanites. 

On 4/28/2022 at 1:52 PM, OFDgal said:

K has so little self-confidence she probably doubted herself figured he was doing the right thing.  

Katina is a foodie so she probably knows the carafe wasn't to drink from. But she is also the one who taught him the word "gonjula." Just sayin'.

[love2lovebadtv]

On 5/20/2022 at 7:35 PM, JenE4 said:

There’s no way in hell that either Olajuwon or Katina would even come close to naming the word carafe! This is the couple who readily agreed that a gondola was a ganjala and an alpaca was a gazoo!

When Katina actually said, "...sheep, or whatever that animal was," I had to rewind.