S14.E12: Settling In, Or Just Settling?

[Straycat80]

Those poor cats do not look impressed by the shark costumes. 

[Crashcourse]

I zoned out on Lindsey and Mark.  Why is she pissed?

[Mindthinkr]

2 minutes ago, Crashcourse said:

I zoned out on Lindsey and Mark.  Why is she pissed?

Same here. Seems she gets upset about a lot of things. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Sriracha should invest in a better wig. This one looks like something you’d get at a yard sale.

[Straycat80]

2 minutes ago, Crashcourse said:

I zoned out on Lindsey and Mark.  Why is she pissed?

I’m not sure either. I think she feels Mark isn’t trying with the marriage and she is? 

[Vanderboom]

 . . . So Lindsey's annoyed that Mark wants her to participate in the cat photo shoot that was her idea and she arranged? I don't understand.

[Mindthinkr]

1 minute ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Sriracha should invest in a better wig. This one looks like something you’d get at a yard sale.

I read that as yarn sale 😂

[Katie111]

7 minutes ago, Mindthinkr said:

Same here. Seems she gets upset about a lot of things. 

I think it started with laundry, I think he shrunk some of her clothes.  She’s also pissed because he created the white board and now isn’t following through with it. 
 

Noi’s brother is even more annoying than she is! 

[Straycat80]

13 minutes ago, Vanderboom said:

 . . . So Lindsey's annoyed that Mark wants her to participate in the cat photo shoot that was her idea and she arranged? I don't understand.

I have a feeling these cheesy things they do are producer driven. 

[CSunshine76]

These people say the word “like” more than the whole world combined.  Noi is the worst, but now it’s Steve, Michael and Jasmine (is that her name? I’ve blanked). If we made it a drinking game we would all have alcohol poisoning.

And yes, this episode is so boring that is my takeaway. 

[Katie111]

Lindsay’s dress (or nightgown?) is horrible.  She wears very ill fitting clothes.  And then she pairs it in with Adidas slides and then adds a trench coat.  Whaaattt??

Edited March 31, 2022 by Katie111

[ECM1231]

1 hour ago, LennieBriscoe said:

Jasmina's dog Mr. Feeny is THE MOST ADORABLE!! 

He really is! Does anyone know what breed he is? Is he a mixed breed?

[CSunshine76]

4 minutes ago, Katie111 said:

Lindsay’s dress (or nightgown?) is horrible.  She wears very ill fitting clothes.  And then she pairs it in with Adidas slides and then adds a trench coat.  Whaaattt??

What was that outfit?! I was questioning it in every preview I saw. And the episode still didn’t answer my questions.  It looked like a little girl was playing dress up in her mom’s nighty. Or prom dress? No idea what it is!

[buttersister]

Quote

I wonder if he gave any thought to how it’s going to look when he’s in his 50’s,

He can't think ahead to the end of a sentence, so, imo, no. What he does is project. Like the 'ho he was and will be again. He is never wrong and woe unto those who say he is.

Not sure if this episode was so boring because these people are boring or just because they can't even put the fun in dysfunctional. Except Michael. He's trying.

Noi is passive aggressive, which is why she won't tell Steve she's up in the air about them because she doesn't believe he'll be the husband she's looking for. 

Steve is so full of shit, I'm done with him. You can't get a job because that will cut into your time to do creative thinking about your future?? What?? You self-entitled maladjusted boy. What do you think job or career changing people do in the real world? I was fine with him taking a break to chill on the road and then get a game plan together, but he's not doing that, is he? And does he really tell Noi she has to figure out his game plan? Make it make sense.

Pretty sure I'll be recording and FF past Lindsey and probably Mark for the rest of the season (rest of these people, most likely). She's unwatchable. Get help, Lindsey. You need it--and not from Pepper & Co. If anyone in the Boston area knows a woman who'd be okay married to a guy who eats basic protein and simple carbs, has some emotional problems and otherwise will remain a bachelor, give him a call. He likes cats and doesn't appear to be cruel. But seriously, I couldn't tell if he was nixing every fruit and vegetable in that market because of the budget, he really doesn't like/eat any of them or he was just giving Lindsey shit.

Oh and as to whether Mark has followed through on any of the white board stuff, I'm not taking Lindsey's word for it.

[Koalagirl]

1 hour ago, Mindthinkr said:

Who names their child after a hot sauce? Sriracha 

That’s his drag name.

1 hour ago, Crashcourse said:

I wonder if Noi's brother is auditioning for Project Runway.

More likely RuPaul’s Drag Race.

[Straycat80]

39 minutes ago, ECM1231 said:

He really is! Does anyone know what breed he is? Is he a mixed breed?

He kind of looks like a Labradoodle. He Is adorable. 

[Yeah No]

1 hour ago, Katie111 said:

Who took care of Sushi before Steve was in the picture? .  Noi is a bitch who is always throwing it in Steve’s face that she “works” and he doesn’t.  Sounds like based on his conversation with Mark, Steve is doing just fine financially right now and is paying more than his share. 

Just because he pays his share doesn't mean he's earned the right sit around while Noi does half the housework after coming home from work.  The way he was talking it sounded like he was saying that doing all the housework would interfere with his "creative thinking".  Seriously?  To what end?  Is he going to be the founder of the next Apple or something?  I doubt it!  If he is independently wealthy then he can volunteer.  And if he has that much money, offer to pay for a cleaning service to do the work he isn't doing in the house.  If he doesn't at least want to do something to take the pressure off his wife he is full of shit. 

He reminds me of a movie I saw once where the husband BSed his way into not doing anything at home because he was "writing a book" which of course never got finished.  Meanwhile the wife worked full time at her day job then again for a second shift at home at night while he was basically goofing off.  Paying half the expenses doesn't make it OK in my book, sorry.  I don't blame Noi for not trusting him on this.  Just what is his "plan"?  I don't get it.  I wouldn't even care about the money, my ethic is that people should have some kind of meaningful work to do not just "dream" all day long while their partner does all the work. 

[Yeah No]

54 minutes ago, buttersister said:

Pretty sure I'll be recording and FF past Lindsey and probably Mark for the rest of the season (rest of these people, most likely). She's unwatchable. Get help, Lindsey. You need it--and not from Pepper & Co. If anyone in the Boston area knows a woman who'd be okay married to a guy who eats basic protein and simple carbs, has some emotional problems and otherwise will remain a bachelor, give him a call. He likes cats and doesn't appear to be cruel. But seriously, I couldn't tell if he was nixing every fruit and vegetable in that market because of the budget, he really doesn't like/eat any of them or he was just giving Lindsey shit.

No, Mark really is one of those people that doesn't like fruit or vegetables and probably much more.  Sorry to say that I was right a couple of weeks ago when I spotted him for someone that only likes very few foods.  In his case, according to Lindsey he mostly eats macaroni and cheese and chicken fingers and very little else.  He was reacting that way to her because she kept asking him if he'd be open to certain things because it irks her that he isn't.  It bothers her that someone could have such a restrictive diet and it is probably hard for her to live with that.  I know it would be hard for me, I am a home cook and foodie.  Lindsey is toxic but she didn't bargain for being matched with someone that's that averse to most foods.  I had a friend like him once who only ate very few things and it was hard even finding a restaurant he would be willing to eat at.  It had to serve something he liked to eat or the group couldn't go there.  He ended up dictating where we could eat.  For many people living with a person like that would feel too restrictive and difficult.  Again, Lindsey is toxic and keeps badgering him because he is such a disappointment to her, but the more I learn about Mark the more I see that he himself is not an easy man to match.

[greeneyedscorpio]

2 hours ago, buttersister said:

But seriously, I couldn't tell if he was nixing every fruit and vegetable in that market because of the budget, he really doesn't like/eat any of them or he was just giving Lindsey shit.

 

I don't know either, but I thought it was really funny.  

[Racj82]

4 hours ago, Katie111 said:

How does Jasmine not know how to drive?  Isn’t she like 30 years old? 

I would assume it depends on where you live. A lot of people just deal with transit as an adult. Now, you throw Uber and all that into it. No gas and car insurance.

3 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

I have a feeling these cheesy things they do are producer driven. 

I have a feeling that photo shoot is precisely the type of thing she would do with or without producers.

[LennieBriscoe]

Mark "recoiled" (her word) from Lindsey's "grip," as he then phrased it. That is when she packed it in.

People can eat what they want, or not. It's called "autonomy." My friends wouldn't touch my speecy-spicy dishes, and I wouldn't go near their fruits. However, in the case of L&M, different food preferences are  just another brick in the wall. 

[becauseIsaidso]

IMO, Steve is starting to look like a better groomed version of Matt the lazy, cheating, couch-surfing loser who was foisted off on  Amber (IIRC) and, last I knew, was actually making an earnest effort to avoid giving her the divorce. I don't trust Steve's lack of sharing anything concrete with Noi about what their finances will actually be if she chooses to stay married to him.  Proof is an excellent concept.

[Cancun]

I’ve wondered since Steve isn’t working or actively looking, and won’t say what his employment plan is…maybe his plan is to parlay their season into more MAFS gigs like Couples Cam. (Not likely now!). Hence the weird “I need time to dream and be creative” response.  He doesn’t want to get a job that may interfere with getting a tv offer, but he can’t exactly say that on camera. He at least needs to say it off camera to Noi.

Edited March 31, 2022 by Cancun

[kristen111]

11 hours ago, Mr. Miner said:

Steve’s an adventurous free spirit! 🙄🥱

Another humdinger of a match.  Thank you Experts.  Too much tequila that day?

[kristen111]

10 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

I’m not sure either. I think she feels Mark isn’t trying with the marriage and she is? 

He put three of her things in the dryer, and ruined them.  Everytime my husband does the laundry, he asks me if whites can go with the black stuff.  EVERYTIME !   Anyhow, Lindsey went on her usual rampage that he does everything wrong, and is not attentive enough to her feelings.  They both need to call it a day.  Another mismatch.

[kristen111]

10 hours ago, Katie111 said:

Lindsay’s dress (or nightgown?) is horrible.  She wears very ill fitting clothes.  And then she pairs it in with Adidas slides and then adds a trench coat.  Whaaattt??

I crack up Everytime they have a fight.  She says “I’m done”.  Then puts her slides and trench coat over her long nightgown and goes out the door.  Then the next night, they are having dinner in a restaurant and acting all lovey dovey. 🤮🤮

[Lindz]

11 hours ago, Katie111 said:

Who took care of Sushi before Steve was in the picture? .  Noi is a bitch who is always throwing it in Steve’s face that she “works” and he doesn’t.  Sounds like based on his conversation with Mark, Steve is doing just fine financially right now and is paying more than his share. 

EXACTLY! WHO cleaned her bathroom & stuff??? She's acting so entitled & that's very repulsive. Like with O expecting Kat to cook him dinner, she just expects Steve to take care of the home & it's unattractive & uninspiring to push those expectations on him & not appreciating him, seemingly. & her saying he could KHA was so inappropriate. It seemed jokey, but also said the same way she said, "F this," when she walked out after Noodlegate. It's so childish! She's lucky he played it off. It's so sad to see them unable to figure out something so simple.

[kristen111]

6 hours ago, LennieBriscoe said:

Mark "recoiled" (her word) from Lindsey's "grip," as he then phrased it. That is when she packed it in.

People can eat what they want, or not. It's called "autonomy." My friends wouldn't touch my speecy-spicy dishes, and I wouldn't go near their fruits. However, in the case of L&M, different food preferences are  just another brick in the wall. 

Lindsey is very touchy feely with everyone, like she was with Chris.  Some people feel offensive when being touched.  Mark doesn’t like when she pokes, pulls at him, as it’s annoying.

[Lindz]

I wonder if Kat was ok with Michael being there for her rehashing of her talk with O. I guess it was good because he could tell O her side. I'm surprised she didn't say she felt unsafe because he was yelling. It was just bizarre to see O choose to go negatively & believe the worst, regardless of what was true. I wish Michael would've asked him why he was choosing to do that. & after his chat with his coach he has so much forgiveness & understanding for HIMSELF, but not his wife! CRAZY! He's doubting her & she's doubting him. He really messed it up. I really wanna know what his endgame was because nothing he did was constructive. Did he expect her to apologize & beg for forgiveness? Why not actually find out the truth? He chose to be upset. Makes no sense.

[kristen111]

7 hours ago, Racj82 said:

I have a feeling that photo shoot is precisely the type of thing she would do with or without producers.

All those cats are so calm.  My cats, when I had them, would be hissing and climbing up the curtains.  They would never want to be sharks;  it would be demeaning to them, lol.

[Lindz]

WHY are they still playing Chris & Alyssa's wedding in the intro??? AND it was as PC was talking about DD. 😂😂

Edited March 31, 2022 by Lindz

[Lindz]

Mark & Steve weren't even that far apart on the beach! Steve is talking crazy! Noi needs to tell him a plan? Say what?! They're a mess! 😂

[Gator Stud]

13 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

Steve keeps saying IF he gets a job, IF he gets a job he can’t do this and that. IDK if I was Noi I’d rethink having three kids with this guy.

IF is progress.  Before Steve wouldnt even think about going back to being chained to a cubicle.

[Lindz]

Noi sounds crazy saying she doesn't want to live together after DD & should be an ADULT & explain why so they can figure it out. But no. She wants him to do the housework, have 3 kids, & get a job & that's all that matters. How does she expect him to trust her when she won't be upfront & honest? How do they expect to get anywhere when they won't work together? They're both a problem.

[Gator Stud]

12 hours ago, Katie111 said:

How does Jasmine not know how to drive?  Isn’t she like 30 years old? 

I know someone in their 50s who has never driven.  He lived in NYC, The Bay, and now LA, so it was easy for him not to drive.  A car accident freaked him out as a kid.

12 hours ago, kristen111 said:

The woman can’t drive, but she beat him at scrabble, which she had to throw in.

None of her previous boyfriends lived in the same state.  How did they hook up if she couldnt drive.  Uber has skyrocketed.

[Gator Stud]

11 hours ago, buttersister said:

Steve is so full of shit, I'm done with him. You can't get a job because that will cut into your time to do creative thinking about your future?? What?? You self-entitled maladjusted boy. What do you think job or career changing people do in the real world? I was fine with him taking a break to chill on the road and then get a game plan together, but he's not doing that, is he? And does he really tell Noi she has to figure out his game plan? Make it make sense.

You cant make good long term plans or "dream" about a better future while you are on the Hamster Wheel running like a rat getting cheese.  You need time off to create a well thought out plan.  When I moved from TX, I was a beach bum for 34 month- without any job.  And then I was able to put together a good plan.  Maybe Steve is doing that too.  Americans are too brainwashed that we have to work 24/7 or we are lazy scumbags. I'm on team Steve until he runs out of money.

[Mr. Miner]

Marks favorite sushi!  (I saw this on reddit)

Edited March 31, 2022 by Mr. Miner

[Gator Stud]

10 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Just because he pays his share doesn't mean he's earned the right sit around while Noi does half the housework after coming home from work.  The way he was talking it sounded like he was saying that doing all the housework would interfere with his "creative thinking".  Seriously?  To what end?  Is he going to be the founder of the next Apple or something?

Maybe. Maybe he will be the next hot startup. Why would he get a job now, when he is filming?  How would his first 90 days look? If he is paying the bills, who cares if he works? I have friends who have never worked, but they can pay all of the bills.  What is the real value of work? To get money.  What if you already have money?  Why would working appeal to you? Its just something society expects.  Maybe Steve wasnt happy when he was working.  And he wants to not do that again.

[Yeah No]

6 minutes ago, Gator Stud said:

Maybe. Maybe he will be the next hot startup. Why would he get a job now, when he is filming?  How would his first 90 days look? If he is paying the bills, who cares if he works? I have friends who have never worked, but they can pay all of the bills.  What is the real value of work? To get money.  What if you already have money?  Why would working appeal to you? Its just something society expects.  Maybe Steve wasnt happy when he was working.  And he wants to not do that again.

I don't care if he doesn't work if he has enough money to pay his share of the bills, but he should let Noi know how much he has.  It seems like she is still in the dark about his financial net worth.  What's the big secret?  I don't blame her for not trusting him if he's not completely transparent with her about how much he has, where it's coming from and what his future plans for earning more are.  They are married and those things should not be a secret between a married couple.

Also, if he's really not doing much or any work at this time he should be doing more than half of the housework.  But he acts really vague about that.  If he's really doing something legit and doing more housework would interfere with that, again, what is it and what's the big secret?  He doesn't even have to reveal it on camera, just let her know about it so she can stop wondering whether he is full of shit or not.  

More under spoiler box:

Spoiler

Also, watch the Afterparty, the way she answers Keisha's question shows she's not expecting all that much from him and he just hasn't given her the answers yet as of this episode.

 

Edited March 31, 2022 by Yeah No

[Gator Stud]

10 hours ago, Yeah No said:

He reminds me of a movie I saw once where the husband BSed his way into not doing anything at home because he was "writing a book" which of course never got finished.  Meanwhile the wife worked full time at her day job then again for a second shift at home at night while he was basically goofing off

Sounds like a Lifetime movie. 😂

[Gator Stud]

10 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I wouldn't even care about the money, my ethic is that people should have some kind of meaningful work to do not just "dream" all day long while their partner does all the work

You seem hardcore.  Work just for the sake of working.  What about doing thing that make you happy or having spiritual pursuits? Why should Steve have to work if he can pay the bills?  Just so Noi can brag to her friends about Steve's job? That's not good enough, post COVID.  People want to do other things besides slave for an asshole boss and miss their kids' birthdays and soccer games.

[Yeah No]

27 minutes ago, Gator Stud said:

I know someone in their 50s who has never driven.  He lived in NYC, The Bay, and now LA, so it was easy for him not to drive.  A car accident freaked him out as a kid.

I am all on board with Jasmina learning how to drive even if she "doesn't need it" now because her life circumstances can and probably will change in time.  My best friend in NYC is 64 and never learned how to drive.  She is regretting it now because her needs have changed in retirement and right now she would rather leave the city.  Boston is not as big as NYC and it would actually be harder to live there than NYC or other big cities without being able to drive.  I think Jasmina has shown incredible change and more openness to it since the season started and I'm hoping it continues.

[Yeah No]

3 minutes ago, Gator Stud said:

You seem hardcore.  Work just for the sake of working.  What about doing thing that make you happy or having spiritual pursuits? Why should Steve have to work if he can pay the bills?  Just so Noi can brag to her friends about Steve's job? That's not good enough, post COVID.  People want to do other things besides slave for an asshole boss and miss their kids' birthdays and soccer games.

Did you read my posts?  I said I don't care if he works in a job, and it doesn't matter what he does as long as he is doing some kind of work that enriches himself, like volunteering.  "Work" in my view does not have to mean a 9-5 "work for the man" job.  And I actually don't believe Noi would only see it that way either if she knew what he was really up to and what his bottom line is in terms of how much he has in the bank.  The root of her problem with him is his vagueness and lack of transparency.  It's making him look like a slacker that wants her to support him.  If that's not the case please enlighten her about it with the details, not vague talk that sounds sketchy.

13 minutes ago, Gator Stud said:

Sounds like a Lifetime movie. 😂

I don't watch Lifetime movies.

[Gator Stud]

15 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

Also, if he's really not doing much or any work at this time he should be doing more than half of the housework.  But he acts really vague about that.  If he's really doing something legit and doing more housework would interfere with that, again, what is it and what's the big secret?  He doesn't even have to reveal it on camera, just let her know about it so she can stop wondering whether he is full of shit or not.  

I agree that Steve should step up at the house if he is not working, but Steve should not have to do every chore by himself. Maybe he doesn't want Noi blabbing how much he is worth to the girls and America. Steve is taking a hard stance against Corporate America.  He wont be forced back into that.  He probably had more fun and inspiration living in his car for months than being chained to his cubicle then fired when the company needed more profit. 

[Lindz]

Lindsey really likes to make herself upset. Geez! She wants Mark to take responsibility but where has she taken responsibility? Why do they, KNOWINGLY, keep doing the same thing that doesn't work? Since they can't discuss things properly, follow a guideline with some rules! She talks about how she feels, what about how he feels? Maybe she can't get there because he doesn't seem to care to make her feel better. She shouldn't have gone off on him over her ruined clothes. That's not how to inspire positive change. Their dysfunction is draining. Those frozen cats dressed as sharks were funny though! Mark should've waited til after the photoshoot to have that talk. Why was her dress wet?

Edited April 1, 2022 by Lindz

[Gator Stud]

5 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

Did you read my posts?  I said I don't care if he works in a job, and it doesn't matter what he does as long as he is doing some kind of work that enriches himself, like volunteering. 

Why does he have to do anything if he pays the bills?  Why does he need to volunteer? This seems like old school thinking.  Why cant Steve just do what makes him happy?  Why does he have to work to enrich himself.  Didnt he already build an app? COVID showed Americans exactly what Corporate America is about, and many are just not going to do that dance again.  What is in it for Steve to go back to being chained to a cubicle? He can pay his bills, so what is the rush?  Why should Steve go back to something that makes him miserable?

[Yeah No]

1 minute ago, Gator Stud said:

I agree that Steve should step up at the house if he is not working, but Steve should not have to do every chore by himself. Maybe he doesn't want Noi blabbing how much he is worth to the girls and America. Steve is taking a hard stance against Corporate America.  He wont be forced back into that.  He probably had more fun and inspiration living in his car for months than being chained to his cubicle then fired when the company needed more profit. 

I don't know if we can know what's going on in Steve's mind about corporate America.  For all we know he is going to make his money doing projects for companies as clients, so he can't hate it all that much.  I doubt he is going to buy a bus and live on the beach like Tom from many seasons ago.  And I kind of doubt that while the show was being filmed he was doing as much or more work than Noi is at her corporate job.  I know what talent acquisition people do and it's a very active, high stress job, not just sitting in a cubicle punching a keyboard.  So again, he needs to "show her the money" and what all he is doing to justify him not doing more than 50% of the housework or just STFU.

[Yeah No]

8 minutes ago, Gator Stud said:

Why does he have to do anything if he pays the bills?  Why does he need to volunteer? This seems like old school thinking.  Why cant Steve just do what makes him happy?  Why does he have to work to enrich himself.  Didnt he already build an app? COVID showed Americans exactly what Corporate America is about, and many are just not going to do that dance again.  What is in it for Steve to go back to being chained to a cubicle? He can pay his bills, so what is the rush?  Why should Steve go back to something that makes him miserable?

Because no one gets married, wants all the things that marriage and family require while their spouse works and does more of the housework while they go and smell the roses unless they want to end up in divorce court, that's why.  It's not "old school thinking".  Everyone wants something meaningful to do in life that involves more than just flaking off and lounging around.  My husband works for mega millionaires and they have a very high work ethic.  They don't have to work another day in their lives but they choose to do what suits them whatever it is.  And it's never just nothing or living only a life of leisure even when they retire.  They didn't become mega millionaires by sitting on their asses.  And Steve will never make it to retirement financially if he does that either.  I really seriously doubt he has enough money stashed away to afford to do that.  Maybe for now but not for the long haul.  And THAT's what is worrying Noi, with good reason IMHO.  Unless he can show her a bank account with enough money to justify him living a life of leisure again he should STFU.

Also, whatever Steve does he does not have to "sell his soul" to corporate America to do it.  There are many ways to make money with his talents that won't involve him doing that and he can work on his terms.  But again, he isn't even showing her how he plans to do that.

Edited March 31, 2022 by Yeah No

[Gator Stud]

10 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

I don't know if we can know what's going on in Steve's mind about corporate America.  For all we know he is going to make his money doing projects for companies as clients, so he can't hate it all that much.  I doubt he is going to buy a bus and live on the beach like Tom from many seasons ago.  And I kind of doubt that while the show was being filmed he was doing as much or more work than Noi is at her corporate job.  I know what talent acquisition people do and it's a very active, high stress job, not just sitting in a cubicle punching a keyboard.  So again, he needs to "show her the money" and what all he is doing to justify him not doing more than 50% of the housework or just STFU.

I think Steve can get other women besides Annoying who wont pressure him with having 3 kids.  So Steve would go from easily supporting one person to struggling to support 4 people. Maybe Steve should cut his losses now and find someone who can vibe with his work ethic.  I dont like to use ethic next to work, because they are not remotely related to each other. Its just another way Americans have been propagandized to work without thinking about what value work provides.  These weird phrases that were created. If work = ethical, not working = unethical.

[Yeah No]

13 minutes ago, Gator Stud said:

Why does he have to do anything if he pays the bills? 

Speaking of "old school thinking", this is about as old school as it gets.  Most modern women I know would consider this very male chauvinist pre-1960s thinking coming from their spouse.  And if that's how Steve really feels, I don't blame Noi one bit for not liking it.  Because he pays the bills it's OK for him to sit on his ass while she does all the housework AND works in a job full time?  I'd tell my husband to GTFO.