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MAFS Social Media, Spoilers & Speculation


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(edited)

This is going to be such a train wreck, and I'm not going to be able to watch until a few days later due to family stuff. I'm already trying to figure out how to pitch this show to my mom, who wouldn't watch The Amazing Race because "there's too much tension."

This is UNACCEPTABLE! Who cares about RL? ;)

I will miss your evenhanded modding AND your posts. :-*

[snip]

If he weren't being such a bozo in defending all of his actions, I'd almost feel sorry for Dr. C. Almost.

Yeah. To me, JC is not a sympathetic victim of collateral damage. He threw himself into this completely. To me, his is a complete betrayal of trust. Edited by sleekandchic
  • Love 2

cmuggs_ about 4 hours ago

No he is defending himself from the ridicule and speculations before they happen he is making it known not hiding like a punk.. He's a man of his word and I stand by my boy 100% @natalieguillen

No brain cells

Seriously the idiot confirmed the speculation about the threats that went down at the reunion by posting the protection order, does he really think that it is going to make him look good. Then letting his boys slut shame his 'wife' and commenting on others looks, I can totally see that he was ready to be 'a man' and prepared for marriage.

I think Cirlona is curled up in a fetal position rocking chanting 'I am not wrong, I am not wrong' right now. How they can spin this and save the franchise is beyond me, I don't think even the trainwreck that is the Bachelor franchise has a protection order yet.

  • Love 10

Just thought of something when this first came to the USA there was an article on how the network had to conform to a set of standards that the Danish creater wanted hence why it ended up on FYI as they were prepared to do it more documentry style rather than drama like some other networks pitched. Maybe they won't have a choice on continuing as the Danish production company may pull the rights, this has to be considered damaging for the whole francise.

(edited)

Given that on the Australian show the participants aren't even legally married and what has been shown thus far on the American version, I doubt that clause existed and if it were there are so many loopholes in it that there will be no "truth" shown.

Haven't read the above mentioned article or seen the Dutch show I imagine it was more the original producers may have shopped the series with that thought in mind or more likely my deep cynical heart believes that was a pr answer to why this show was only sold to a tiny cable network that a small portion of America gets and even less watch.

Edited by biakbiak
(edited)

 

This 'rigorous' process somehow overlooked, or was not concerned, about Sean's situations:

Loss of miscarried child

DUI arrest

Pending Promotion

(I am sure there are more things.)

 

The scientific method involves verification of new information.  Generally when someone earns a PhD, it indicates the recipient has created new knowledge by implementing the scientific method, and as a result understands the scientific method.  Real scientists, social or physical, do not mind criticism of their work since it merely verifies their work or proves their work false.  If the PhDs on this show understood that, they would welcome having their processes put 'under the microscope' in order to demonstrate the value of their discoveries.  Levkoff and Cilona may have skipped their classes in the scientific method at NYU and Argosy University.

 

Social media is not subject to the scientific method.

 

[After reading the first paragraph of the link, I thought she was going to leave the show!  Sadly, she was just setting the reader up for a bitch slap]

 

This morning, through Amazon Local, I received a blurb about an "Online Behavioral Therapy Course", I'll pass it along to our experts.

Edited by Liberty
  • Love 1

I don't think he is that smart. 

 

He posted the PO to get out in front of it.  I'm sure he believed that Jessica would find some way to leak it or make it public (which I believe as well) and he decided that it was in his best interest to be the one to make it public with his comment  about the truth will eventually come out.  I don't think we will hear anymore from him about the PO because I believe there is some truth to what has been leaked about him so far. 

 

I just think that he believes by getting out in front of it he can lessen the damage.

 

Never underestimate what people can come up with in panic mode. I think he's been in panic mode since receiving those papers, scrambling to turn things in his favour. All it takes is for him or someone he knows to have made a fake SM account before and his mind will immediately go to it as a way to make Jess seem crazy and himself the victim. And looking at his social circle it's very likely there's been a lot of craziness going on.

  • Love 2

We now know that at least two couples are not speaking to each other, and the third we aren't sure about, they might still be friends. But the premise of the show is a fairy tale romance of happily ever after, and if the experts can't get the matches right, if they can't deliver the fairy tale, the show flops.

The defensive posture of the experts is now the entertainment factor. They aren't used to being wrong. That's the thing about the social sciences, it's very hard to tell if the practitioner is doing it wrong, and very easy to blame the subjects if the experiment fails.

The atheist spiritual advisor was trying to prove his theory that religion doesn't matter. Put together two couples with different religions and they'll work out anyway. But without a shared faith to fall back on, those marriages flamed out spectacularly.

The sexologist was trying to prove that great sex can repair a lousy relationship. Vaughn and Monet disproved that theory in Season 1, Jessica and Ryan disproved it in Season 2.

the sociologist seemed to be trying to prove that shared values trump shared geography.

The psychologist seemed to be trying to prove that all you need is communication.

All their theories have been disproved. But rather than rethink their theories and methods, they are blaming the lab rats.

If they were really scientists, they could plausibly blame the Observer Effect

  • Love 7
(edited)

We now know that at least two couples are not speaking to each other, and the third we aren't sure about, they might still be friends. But the premise of the show is a fairy tale romance of happily ever after, and if the experts can't get the matches right, if they can't deliver the fairy tale, the show flops.

The defensive posture of the experts is now the entertainment factor. They aren't used to being wrong. That's the thing about the social sciences, it's very hard to tell if the practitioner is doing it wrong, and very easy to blame the subjects if the experiment fails.

The atheist spiritual advisor was trying to prove his theory that religion doesn't matter. Put together two couples with different religions and they'll work out anyway. But without a shared faith to fall back on, those marriages flamed out spectacularly.

The sexologist was trying to prove that great sex can repair a lousy relationship. Vaughn and Monet disproved that theory in Season 1, Jessica and Ryan disproved it in Season 2.

the sociologist seemed to be trying to prove that shared values trump shared geography.

The psychologist seemed to be trying to prove that all you need is communication.

All their theories have been disproved. But rather than rethink their theories and methods, they are blaming the lab rats.

If they were really scientists, they could plausibly blame the Observer Effect

 

Wow, great minds think alike or you were reading my mind all morning - I was just thinking the same thing and about to make a similar post.  I think the lesson is that psychology and "psychological instruments" are not a hard science.  People are not easily figured out and it takes a lot more than a few factors or "assessment techniques" to successfully match people.  I wish that instead of defending themselves on the basis of all the so-called rigorous criteria they used in the selection process they could admit that those methods (and they) are not perfect.  But then they would have to shoulder more of the responsibility for the bad matches.  Cilona was interviewed by the Baby board last year and claimed that he and the other experts would not have signed on for this show unless they were in total control of the selection process and could use their assessment techniques and tests to choose the candidates.  Well, if that's true of this season (which it might not be given the rumor posts) then it doesn't say a lot for the experts' judgment in using such flawed techniques.  BTW, most psychologists today know that these methods are flawed at best.  I think Cilona et. al know this but want to lend an air of scientific legitimacy to the process that does not exist - Perhaps at the encouragement of production or because they want to be able to blame those methods or the subjects should the matches fail.  If they say it's all about that process it would be easy to blame the process and not have to take the responsibility for the failed matches.  If they harp on the matches' responsibility to each other, they could blame that.

 

IMO the best matchmakers in history did not use so-called assessment techniques but their own Universe/God given intuition.  Too bad these quacks don't have enough of that to see through posers, abusers and jackasses that slip through the cracks and score well on those tests.  People have long been known to figure out what they would be best answering on those tests to make themselves look psychologically and morally healthier than they really are (despite the supposed built-in testing methods for screening them out).  It takes people with some amount of wisdom to see through that - Personally (and I have said this here over and over) the people on this very board have better sense than these people without advanced degrees and so-called "assessment techniques".  We saw through those guys in a hot minute - You mean those schmucks couldn't do that after spending so much time supposedly assessing them?

Edited by Snarklepuss
  • Love 7
(edited)
IMO the best matchmakers in history did not use so-called assessment techniques but their own Universe/God given intuition.  Too bad these quacks don't have enough of that to see through posers, abusers and jackasses that slip through the cracks and score well on those tests.

 

 

ITA. And the experts' first clue should have been that these men had to be recruited and did not step up and volunteer like the women did.

 

I can only imagine what kind of men *did* volunteer, if RyanD and RyanR and Sean were better!

 

Someone said above that the experts have cut off their own heads by insisting that everything was professionally and scientifically done when choosing the candidates - well, they STILL ended up with a huge fail and are now trying to blame the lab rats. Yes, this is the most interesting part of the show now!

 

Can only wonder what the Season 3 participants, who apparently got married just over a week ago, are thinking now.

Edited by aethera
Fixed Quote
  • Love 6

Just to clear something up.  Atheists are not devoid of beliefs, they just do not believe in a superior god who controls things, basically.  I am atheist and I have very strong spiritual underpinnings.  As for the guy on this show, who the fuck knows.  None of the experts are looking good right about now.  They are not going to be able to further a TV career, that is for sure.  No one will touch them.  

  • Love 8
Someone said above that the experts have cut off their own heads by insisting that everything was professionally and scientifically done when choosing the candidates - well, they STILL ended up with a huge fail and are now trying to blame the lab rats. Yes, this is the most interesting part of the show now!

 

I think the post copied here from that other board might be correct that the "experts" were told by production to step up the process, which made them compromise their standards, etc. against their judgment, but they had to go along with it at that point due to contractual reasons.  If Sean was indeed a friend of the Hehner family this also lends credence to that post as he obviously had connections to get on the show, so how much could his selection been 100% a result of those so-called "instruments" matching him to Davina?

  • Love 2

Just to clear something up.  Atheists are not devoid of beliefs, they just do not believe in a superior god who controls things, basically.  I am atheist and I have very strong spiritual underpinnings.  As for the guy on this show, who the fuck knows.  None of the experts are looking good right about now.  They are not going to be able to further a TV career, that is for sure.  No one will touch them.  

 

This is true.  Atheists come in all stripes and have different beliefs/non-beliefs just like theists do.  Some atheists experience spirituality, just not one that's grounded in a transcendent God, but the natural world.  They often feel a reverence and awe when contemplating the universe and their part in it but don't also conclude that this feeling means there is a God or creator they are responding to, just the awesome nature of the universe.  Other atheists believe in nothing but "atoms and the void" and reject all forms of spirituality.  Theists don't normally understand how atheists can profess to be spiritual, and have spiritual experiences, but it is possible to be consistent and be a spiritual atheist.  I myself am a theist and I believe my spiritual experiences are touching on something divine that transcends the universe.  I knew a scientific atheist once who I thought bordered on being a pantheist in the sense that the universe itself is God or part of God because he kept calling the universe "divine".  He did not agree with me, though!

 

But again, who knows WTF this guy believes in (or not)?

  • Love 4

Those people in the matchmaking special must be thinking they dodged a bullet. Even creepy Asian fetish guy looks better than Ryan now.

Right now a turd looks better than Ryan and the other husbands are no better they are silent in defence of the crap Jac is getting from Ryan and his mates, no what happened in their own marriages how can they remain silent while he tells Jac she is too ugly for the show and other garbage. The silence from the network, experts & husbands against this douche is absolutely appalling.

  • Love 9

Thanks for that a response form Kinetic at last, I do get the impression they are washing their hands of the whole mess from the article.

 

 

"The experts on our show have the best of intentions and highest hopes for success for each couple. After undergoing extensive background and psychological checks by third parties, couples agree to be legally married on our show. We document their journey for six weeks after their wedding, but we can't control how they behave, or govern their actions after production. Our thoughts are with these individuals, and as always we have offered each of them significant aftercare resources. We wish them nothing but the best and hope they have a bright future ahead of them."

Yeah and the fact that this loose canon was cast by the experts is not their fault either right. I would have more respect if they admitted that the goofed and this slimeball should never have made it through the initial testing

  • Love 10
(edited)

 

This is getting big enough so it can no longer be explained away by the "experts." Jessica and Davina will see to that!  You go girls!   This is just getting better and better.  We will see nothing interesting on TV, of course.  SM will become more active after tomorrow night.  

 

Love that People showed the restraining order.  That is huge.  

 

I am giddy.  

Edited by wings707
  • Love 1

IMO the best matchmakers in history did not use so-called assessment techniques but their own Universe/God given intuition.  Too bad these quacks don't have enough of that to see through posers, abusers and jackasses that slip through the cracks and score well on those tests.  People have long been known to figure out what they would be best answering on those tests to make themselves look psychologically and morally healthier than they really are (despite the supposed built-in testing methods for screening them out).  It takes people with some amount of wisdom to see through that - Personally (and I have said this here over and over) the people on this very board have better sense than these people without advanced degrees and so-called "assessment techniques".  We saw through those guys in a hot minute - You mean those schmucks couldn't do that after spending so much time supposedly assessing them?

 

YES!  Not to mention, the face to face interviews really mean next to nothing.  Obviously all of these people had their game faces and attitudes on when they went into the interviews to be on the show.  

 

If they really want legitimate insight into the participants, from this point forward, I think they need to look at social media and involve the participants' families as well!  You don't really know someone until you can see where they've come from.

 

I feel like the guys from Silicon Valley (tv show) could have run a SWOT analysis on all of the participants as individuals and as potential couples and done a better job matching them up.  

 

WOAH!  Great find!!

  • Love 1
(edited)

I work for a well-known hospital. Approximately six years ago (I think) overtures were made for a reality show to film various day-to-day ops. I was called down and asked to participate. (I'm tall and blonde. I think that's what anybody cared about.) I refused to participate and gave my reasons....not the least of which was patient confidentiality, and my solemn professional oath to do no harm.

Some of us care.

 

I agree, but money and fame and money are HUGE draws; especially for someone who already has acting ambitions.  It sounds like you had no such ambitions, so you had no problem saying no to a reality show.  Also many people think only about short term gains, having money, being famous; they never think about the cost to their reputation which maybe was another reason you said no to the reality show.

 

IMO the best matchmakers in history did not use so-called assessment techniques but their own Universe/God given intuition.  Too bad these quacks don't have enough of that to see through posers, abusers and jackasses that slip through the cracks and score well on those tests.  People have long been known to figure out what they would be best answering on those tests to make themselves look psychologically and morally healthier than they really are (despite the supposed built-in testing methods for screening them out).  It takes people with some amount of wisdom to see through that - Personally (and I have said this here over and over) the people on this very board have better sense than these people without advanced degrees and so-called "assessment techniques".  We saw through those guys in a hot minute - You mean those schmucks couldn't do that after spending so much time supposedly assessing them?

 

I'm not sure about this.  Many times matchmakers make mistakes, but they don't make too many mistakes when they have time to talk with and interact with someone.  I think the problem with this show was time.   The experts really didn't have enough time with these people.  I mean how could an expert have known that Ryan had an anger problem?  People on this board figured something was wrong because of how he treated Jessica on the honeymoon.  And you really, really can't tell 100% because people aren't robots and there is no one healthy way that people behave.  What I think happened is that the experts were rushed and picked who they did, but now they can't say that the producers rushed them because they don't want to lose their gravy train or get sued by producers and the network.

Edited by Neurochick
  • Love 3
(edited)

Unfortunately, I know from experience that is not easy to get a protection order - it took me some time before I could get one against someone  against someone who threatened my life and this was done in family court. You don't just ask for the RO in court and the court approves the request with a smile. They don't just hand it out to you like it's a candy. You have to prove that you have a legitimate reason for feeling that your safety is compromised. The fact that Jessica got the order as quickly as she did makes me think there was something serious going on behind closed doors.

 

This show should be canceled asap. I think due to the success of the first season, the network rushed production for a second season, and didn't properly screen participants. After the Monet/Vaughn mess, they really should have paused the second season to re-evaluate how they were pairing couples, but I guess money trumps all.

Edited by trimthatfat
  • Love 7

Ryan posted the People article on his IG. He feels vindicated. 

 

It's odd that he feels vindicated.  The article was pretty general and a different unnamed insider said that drug abuse was not mentioned.  But who knows the truth at this point? 

Unfortunately, I know from experience that is not easy to get a protection order - it took me some kind before I could get one against someone who threatened my life and this was done in family court. You don't just ask for the RO in court and the court approves the request with a smile. They don't just hand it out to you like it's a candy. You have to prove that you have a legitimate reason for feeling that your safety is compromised. The fact that Jessica got the order as quickly as she did makes me think there was something serious going on behind closed doors.

 

Exactly!  Something much more serious than emotional abuse or cheating. 

  • Love 3

I didn't say the atheist spiritual advisor doesn't believe in anything himself, I said I think he was out to prove that religious differences don't matter. But religion does matter, because it is deeply personal, and if you are partnered with somebody who doesn't share your faith, it becomes just another obstacle.

The sociologist seemed determined to prove that shared values and cooking classes could overcome lifestyle differences and geographical distance. The sexologist wanted to prove that good sex is the glue that holds married couples together. And the psychologist wanted to prove the communication style was more important than content. It's not what you say, it's the way you say it. Unfortunately, you can communicate effectively until the cows come home, but if the content of the discussion is whether or not to own cows, style won't resolve the conflict. Eventually somebody says "it's either me or the cow."

For all the experts' blather, this is really soft science. Psychology is just a combination of common sense and bullshit, which is what I learned by getting a bachelor's degree in it.

  • Love 3
(edited)
This show should be canceled asap. I think due to the success of the first season, the network rushed production for a second season, and didn't properly screen participants. After the Monet/Vaughn mess, they really should have paused the second season to re-evaluate how they were pairing couples, but I guess money trumps all.

 

 

From what I saw of Monet and Vaughn, I think the experts were not versed in nuances of non white people, in this case black people.  Vaughn said his ideal woman was Paula Patton and Alicia Keys.  I don't think the experts got what Vaughn was saying, he was attracted to light skinned women.  Monet wanted a more successful man.  To me, the experts made the same mistake that even white matchmakers make and think that if they have two black people, then it's all good because, to them, being black trumps everything else.

Edited by Neurochick
  • Love 13
 Many times matchmakers make mistakes, but they don't make too many mistakes when they have time to talk with and interact with someone.  I think the problem with this show was time.   The experts really didn't have enough time with these people.  I mean how could an expert have known that Ryan had an anger problem?  People on this board figured something was wrong because of how he treated Jessica on the honeymoon.  And you really, really can't tell 100% because people aren't robots and there is no one healthy way that people behave.  What I think happened is that the experts were rushed and picked who they did, but now they can't say that the producers rushed them because they don't want to lose their gravy train or get sued by producers and the network.

 

 

In Dr C's own words they knew

 

 

Sorry to be so absent, but things are REALLY hectic with Season 3 getting underway.

There was much discussion and debate about Ryan D's issues with expressing anger appropriately and having the capacity to be very hot tempered at times.  The potential difficulties posed by this tendency of his in combination with Jessica's sensitivity were very thoroughly considered.  I believe some of this was highlighted in the Matchmaking Special.

Jessica sometimes has difficulty expressing herself frankly and clearly, particularly when it comes to emotional issues.  They both demonstrated siginficant insight and awareness around these tendencies.  They (and we the experts) ultimately felt that there was a potential for them to help eachother grow in the areas they both needed to.  Ryan learning to be more patient/less reactive by being matched with and learning to be sensitive to the needs of a more sensitive and less overtly communicative spouse.  And Jessica learning to buffer her sensitivity a bit and communicate more freely and directly. 

They both expressed that they felt strongly that a spouse that could complement them in that way and help foster growth in the ways they each needed was rather striking.  For me, having such a keen awareness around this and apparent desire and motivation to foster personal growth for themselves in this way through their marriage was what utimately convinced me that the potential benefit and complementarity outweighed the risks.

With that said, Ryan's anger issues and reactivity became troublesome (as you are seeing) rather quickly.  Many of the reactions and behaviors that are being discussed here were surprising to us, even though I was well aware of the issues with anger and reactivity.  He is an interesting dichotomy of quite thoughtful, intelligent, mature and insightful when it comes to certain issues and situations, and quite the polar opposite of these traits in others. 

One of the things that I'm learning about my assessments for MAFS is that my instruments give very accurate and powerful measures of personality that are really seeming to be very on target in the context of the experiment, however, measures of personality are not measures of maturity.  There are really no instruments that can give accurate information about that. 

I think in some cases, much like a child often "regresses" to previous levels of maturity when tired, sick or under stress, adults can have their own version of this reaction.

More importantly, however, is what is turning out to be the big wild card of the experiment:  the way these individuals are actually affected when the experiment begins and they reality of being married to a stranger (and everything be documented on film) acutally hits.

His full response is here http://community.babycenter.com/post/a55825153/married_at_first_sight_season_two?cpg=48 2nd post down

  • Love 2

 

I didn't say the atheist spiritual adviser doesn't believe in anything himself, I said I think he was out to prove that religious differences don't matter.

 

 

Algebra.  My comment on atheism had nothing to do with your post at all.  It was just information that some don't know and I took the opportunity to share.  This thread is so active I, actually, missed your post!  

I don't know if there are any family law attorneys who can speak from experience, but I can't imagine that it is all that difficult to get a temporary order of protection. I can't imagine that the city wants to take the chance of someone in a dangerous situation not getting an OoP and being killed by a former domestic partner. I wonder when his court date re: the OoP is. Playing devil's advocate, let's say that the reunion was a shit show, and Ryan and Jess split up shortly afterwards. He posts those things on instagram, she gets pissed, and gets an OoP based on (verbal?) abuse that took place during the marriage that may or may not be substantiated in court. I don't know. Ryan is trash but I think that I'll have to see what happens in court. It's hard for me to believe that production would be so morally bereft as to manipulate someone in to forgoing filing an OoP. That seems evil. But who knows. I hope that Jessica is safe and that Ryan and his friends cool off. He's looking more and more like an impulsive (and possibly dangerous) person with all of the rants he and his friends are posting.

Jess took out the protection order on Thursday the day the insider information came out, Ryan was served Friday and he started his instagram campaign on Saturday. So I think it was the other way when the insider info became public Jess knew the crap was about to fly so she tried to protect herself.

  • Love 2

 

I don't know if there are any family law attorneys who can speak from experience, but I can't imagine that it is all that difficult to get a temporary order of protection. I can't imagine that the city wants to take the chance of someone in a dangerous situation not getting an OoP and being killed by a former domestic partner.

 

 

Jessica wanted to get a restraining order long before this recent stuff hit the fan.  Production talked her out of it.   Clearly she changed her mind and good for her.  

 

These permits are not given out lightly.  The records show, that requests have been denied and the person was murdered.  I watch ID, way too much!  

 

If they were not strict you would have low life assholes getting them after a fight with their spouse. 

  • Love 4

Huh. I see, that makes sense. I know that Chris was talking about posting a "statement" on his twitter from the women last night but never did. I don't think that one can get around an ironclad entertainment contract by using a friend to speak for you, unless it's as one of those shady "anonymous sources" in a gossip magazine.

I have no idea why he hyped it

 

Davina Kullar retweeted

Chris ‏@cpierro 13h13 hours ago

It feels like it's the us against the world. We are supporting each other and we hope the truth is revealed soon. Tnx for the support. #MAFS

I didn't say the atheist spiritual advisor doesn't believe in anything himself, I said I think he was out to prove that religious differences don't matter. But religion does matter, because it is deeply personal, and if you are partnered with somebody who doesn't share your faith, it becomes just another obstacle.

The sociologist seemed determined to prove that shared values and cooking classes could overcome lifestyle differences and geographical distance. The sexologist wanted to prove that good sex is the glue that holds married couples together. And the psychologist wanted to prove the communication style was more important than content. It's not what you say, it's the way you say it. Unfortunately, you can communicate effectively until the cows come home, but if the content of the discussion is whether or not to own cows, style won't resolve the conflict. Eventually somebody says "it's either me or the cow."

For all the experts' blather, this is really soft science. Psychology is just a combination of common sense and bullshit, which is what I learned by getting a bachelor's degree in it.

I took a look at the "many assessments!" Cilona used and I have to give him the side-eye on that. MMPI? Sure it's valid and reliable for measuring psychopathology, but using it as a test to assess compatibility with another person? Seems like a great Psych 101 example of a validity problem to me.

  • Love 2

I have no idea why he hyped it

 

Davina Kullar retweeted

Chris ‏@cpierro 13h13 hours ago

It feels like it's the us against the world. We are supporting each other and we hope the truth is revealed soon. Tnx for the support. #MAFS

Yes, it is them against the world because the 'experts' and everyone involved with the show wants this all to go away via denial to protect the show and their own reputations.  Plus, the lawsuits that would result would be tremendous. In the People article a production assistant said Jessica never accused Ryan of using.  There's no way Jessica would deny this now that she feels her life could be in danger. I can almost smell the crisp, green of hush money as I type this.

  • Love 2

Yes, I can see a higher bar for a final order of protection, which Jess and Ryan have to go to court to settle, but a temporary order of protection? How tragic and frustrating.

I thought his assessments were a series of open-ended questions that he himself had written? Which is basically bullshit because anyone can lie on paper.

He may have used those too, but he lists:

 

MMPI-2

NEO-PI-R

16PF

PAI

 

The MMPI is definitely a legit psychological instrument, that involves, (gah, well usually anyway) at least a pre or post assessment by someone trained to administer it. But, if it's now suddenly become a way to measure compatibility with another person, that's news to me.

 

If pressed, he might say he used it to screen out any major psychopathology, and maybe he did, but he sure seems to imply that he's using "science" by referencing actual scientific instruments in a way that they were not designed to be used. That's my take on it anyway.

Considering the giant clusterf**k that is Season 2, I'd sure like to know two things:

 

1) Were the Season 3 couples matched the same way that the Season 2 couples were matched? Because if the experts and producers did this again --

 

2) How do the Season 3 couples feel now, since they all got married just 7-10 days ago? I can't imagine they haven't heard about all this!

  • Love 2
(edited)

Since this was a "social experiment," I, for one, declare the experiment a failure. As titillating as it is to watch these strangers put together and hope that they will find love, to me the whole concept is just not realistic in a 21st century Western country. I think they got lucky in the first season; though, frankly, I'm not sure how long those marriages will last once the spotlight is off of them.

 

I think arranged marriages only worked in the past and in certain cultures because the women had no other choice than to acquiesce to the wishes of their parents and get married to whom their parents (not a total stranger who didn't really know anything about the potential mate's character, circumstances, friends, and families) chose for them, and once they were married, they had no real way out. That is not the case with these women who signed up for this show. They all have their own careers and their independent lifestyles, and - thankfully - they don't have to just put up with whatever their husbands dish out to them.

 

Like a lot of posters have mentioned, pairing people on paper doesn't always work out. You have to consider so many other issues, and even if you think they might be a good match, the people in question might still not have that chemistry that you need for a good marriage. I think I read that in the Australian show there's a waiting period before a couple can get married, so the marriage actually comes after the people that have been paired up have been together for a while.

 

I like that scenario so much better. I don't understand how these "experts" can promise a perfect match when they don't even have enough quality participants to choose from and they don't do a really, really thorough vetting and matching process, but demand that these people get legally married, and if it doesn't work out, they'll have to get divorced - as if divorce was such a tiny little thing. And when the matches don't work out, they blame the participants. Ugh.

Edited by BunnySlippers
  • Love 3

I didn't say the atheist spiritual advisor doesn't believe in anything himself, I said I think he was out to prove that religious differences don't matter.

 

I haven't seen any sign of this on the show. From what I've gathered his main role on the show is to make sure these people are compatible when it comes to religion and spirituality. Just because he doesn't believe in God himself doesn't mean he's ignorant about religions. I think it's safe to say that a Harvard theologian is well-versed in all major religions and beliefs regardless of his own. If the participants themselves say they have dated people from other religions and have no problem with religious differences then that's on them.

 

If a national magazine is quoting someone on the inside saying it never happened, I would tend to put more confidence in that than speculative posts on chatboards.

 

I've read that a friend of Ryan's made a comment about his drug use on Jessica's IG or somewhere recently, so it's not just message board gossip. I tend to think there's something to it, if his own friends are bringing it up.

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