Getting to Genoa You All Over Again: Y&R Daily Chat

[WhitneyWhit]

58 minutes ago, SiouxB said:

I also didn’t appreciate Abby running the show when it was Sharon’s idea to give the party and Abby should have just been an invited guest even though it was at her restaurant...I just felt she was acting like the MC...I don’t know.... some thing about the whole party was just depressing with only three scrawny guests and honestly the only saving grace was that adorable baby 👶🏻 

Abby’s dress was hideous and Mariah wasn’t looking too good either

To be fair, Mariah didn’t know she was going to a party, Abby however did know but appeared to have forgotten what type of party while getting dressed. 
 

That was depressing though. In all of Genoa City, those are the only people Mariah and Tess know? Although I did see a random brunette in the background laughing at apparently nothing so I guess that was the only extra they could afford that day. 
 

I literally laughed out loud when Christine said Diane should plead guilty because of “all the evidence”. Where’s Allie to remind everyone about the flaming ambulance when you need her? 
 

I don’t know how I feel about that Crispy preview. On one hand I feel like they’re tricking us and that’s Summer’s dream because I can’t believe they would reveal that so soon — or on the other hand they’re going to completely destroy Summer’s character by helping her mom hide so she won’t  go to prison for killing Stark and allow Diane to remain in jail and possibly go to trial. 

[babyhouseman]

18 minutes ago, Joimiaroxeu said:

Is Billy already making trouble at Jabot? Again? Oh wait, he was just giving Kyle a brief opportunity to focus on something other than Diane and Summer.

Maybe Billy should bring up that he slept with Summer.

[boes]

38 minutes ago, babyhouseman said:

Maybe Billy should bring up that he slept with Summer.

He could describe that extra hand she has growing out of her left underarm, that'd take Kyle's mind off everything.  Love is a many-splendored thing.

49 minutes ago, WhitneyWhit said:

I don’t know how I feel about that Crispy preview. On one hand I feel like they’re tricking us and that’s Summer’s dream because I can’t believe they would reveal that so soon — or on the other hand they’re going to completely destroy Summer’s character by helping her mom hide so she won’t  go to prison for killing Stark and allow Diane to remain in jail and possibly go to trial. 

The scary thing is that both are equally possible and plausible under the Josh Griffith regime.  

[Waldo13]

Nostrils just got back to Jabot and already he’s an ass hole. Nostrils works for Jabot not Marchetti so what gives him the right to question Kyle on Marchetti’s  operations.  Nostril once a schmuck always a schmuck.  As usual, your ideas suck. I would day that even Jabot’s high end products associated with a high end brand will bring Marchetti down a few notches. I would say that even Marchetti Home was a bad idea. If Marchetti wanted an accessory line, than the should employ a high end fashion designer. Someone like Quinn, who did wonders for Forester Creations, in LA.  I really don’t think that Nostrils was trying to give Kyle a distraction by his insane ideas. 

Chance Chance Chance could you even contemplate that Stark and Crispy were in cahoots because Stark and Crispy had more to benefit by framing Diane.  How did Diane maneuver Crispy into marring Stark and give away half her money. Duh!!  🧀 at best. 

Correct me if I’m wrong but Diane was arraigned so Christine would have to give Michael discovery of the evidence against her. Wouldn’t you think by now Michael, at least, would be looking into the evidence of how Diane purchased the poison.  Wouldn’t you think by know, Michael would be looking for video footage of how the accident happened?  Chance seemed to ignore this in his investigation. Christine how many times do you and Chance have to be reminded that the evidence is not strong. It’s circumstantial and Chance hearing that he walked out. Now did he walk out because he knew the evidence was not that strong or did he go to find more substantial evidence?  

The baby shower is a little lame in the fact that hardly anyone was there. Only 4 guests not including the parents.  I had to laugh when Sharon said that in a blink of an eye Aria will be all grown up.  I give it a year and Aria will be graduating from high school and ready for college.  

Drama drama drama. Diane is giving up without even knowing the evidence against her. I guess the monkeys with a keyboard are giving Diane her the opportunity to show off her excellent acting ability. 

Best part of the episode was Tessa and Mariah sitting on the couch with Mariah holding Aria. Here’s were a picture is worth a thousand words. 

Next week Crow will be served.  I’m going to have to spend all weekend if I’m still using Crispy or do I have to come up with another nickname. 

Is Crispy still going to try to put the blame on Diane or just Stark. It would be very hard for Crispy to put the blame on Diane but will the monkeys with a keyboard try to find away?  

I’m asking for your help in trying to decide the most boring couple in GC:

Nostrils/Chelsea

BananaBreath/Sally

Natey Nate Nate/Elena

Noah/Allie 

Daniel/Lily

For me it’s Nostrils/Chelsea because they are both boring. A close second is Banana Breath/Sally because Sally can be interesting when she’s not with Banana Breath. 

[Js Nana]

Gone, dreams of the past
Gone, with a love that moved too fast
Gone, bright shiny days
Gone, in a young and restless haze
Why did we love, then run away
So little time, so much left to say
And now, it's gone

Young and restless friend
You'll never pass this way again
Drink the summer wine
Reach for the stars
While you have time
Your restless dream
Will lead the way
So dream your dreams and live for each day
While you are young

Gone, in a young and restless haze

Nadia's Theme - no special reason, just feeling nostalgic

[SweePea59]

5 hours ago, Gam2 said:

Wow. That was some high falutin baby shower at Society. With 3 guests!! I thought Mariah and Tessa had more friends than that but guess not. 

It always amazes me that none of Tessa's friends or associates from her music career are ever around or even mentioned. There was that one guy a couple years ago, but doesn't she have a manager, isn't she friendly with the musicians she tours with, doesn't she have any friends from the music scene? And how and when in the world did she become friends with the world's busiest doctor who is in a relationship?

20 hours ago, boes said:

Luckily, Daniel's got Lily.  Who, it seems has had a near fatal hair mishap but here's hoping she pulls through.

Her hair didn't look that bad when she was in prison with nothing more than the glitter from greeting cards to make herself pretty. Honestly, I'm still miffed that we never got a prison story or post prison story with someone she met behind bars.

[NinjaPenguins]

Billy: Time to get down to Jabusiness.

Kyle: You going to a costume party, Uncle Billy?

Billy: I’m working, you schmuck. How is your, um, you know what? Don’t care.

Kyle: Kind of you to ask. My mom is in jail for killing my mother-in-law, my wife thinks she’s guilty and today my hair was unable to achieve maximum elevation. My personal style and marriage are hanging by a thread.

Billy: Yep. Still don’t care. You can go home if you want.

Kyle: I needed a distraction.

Billy: Here’s one. What’s this Marchetti bullshit?

@@@@@@

Abby: I am not up to anything. Thank you for coming.

Tessa: We’d have gotten earlier, but someone was fussy.

Mariah: Guilty as charged. 

Abby: Follow me inside. Tee hee.

SURPRISE!

Sharon: It’s your baby shower!

Mariah: Aww, my brother brought me the gift of laughter in the form of a stupid jacket/shirt combo..

@@@@@@

Jack: How are you?

Diane: How the fuck do you think I am?

Jack: Can I bring you anything? I’ll use all my rich guy influence to buy you special privileges, more outdoor time, imported caviar.

Diane: I can take care of myself. I’ve squirreled away a pair of scissors from the prison library. But… there is one thing you can do.

Jack: Anything.

Diane: Hit the road, Jack, and don’t come back no more.

@@@@@@

Chance: Diane and the deer couldn’t have done this by themselves. Stark had to be involved.

Christine: Agreed. I can buy that Diane gave Phyllis poison and the deer lured the ambulance off the road. But Stark was pulling the strings in the background.

Chance: Could he be a deer whisperer?

Christine: I don’t know. He could be an alchemist. Strychnine is usually a bad way to go, but it was like Phyllis drifted gently off to sleep. Maybe Stark developed Diet Strychnine.

Chance: Fiendish. We need to find this guy. He’s obviously Diane’s partner.

Christine: All of Diane’s communications have been monitored. There’s been nothing. Of course, we can’t rule out a telepathic connection.

Chance: Right. Jeremy checked out of the German Prophylactic, transferred a fuckton of Phyllis’ money into his account and disappeared. I can’t help but wonder if Diane killed him too.

Christine: Jail is no obstacle to a killing machine like her.

Chance: They were probably going to split the inheritance Jeremy got from Phyllis. Diane decided she wanted it all. I’ve just got to get past the fact that Diane was marrying into a filthy rich family and didn’t the need extra cash.

Michael: Did I hear my client’s name being taken in vain? Pay attention, bitches, because school is now in session.

@@@@@@@

Kyle: Marchetti rules, dude. My textile mills rule.

Billy: It wouldn’t surprise me if Victor gave you a couple of Superfund sites.

Kyle: I inspected those sites personally. The next day my hair shot up three inches.

Billy: Hello?

Kyle: I pulled off a brilliant coup getting those mills and maneuvering Adam outta here so you could take his job. You’re welcome.

Billy: He fucked off on his own terms, but enjoy your flex, numbnuts. If you’re done being a condescending clown shoe, I’ve got a primo idea for combining Jabot’s and Marchetti’s advertising campaigns.

Kyle: You rube. Marchetti is class and luxury. Jabot is trash. Two different markets.

Billy: Tell me, dear nephew, how do the elite look upon the rogering of cowboy hats?

Kyle: Wow. You’ve been here a few hours and already with the hat jokes.

Billy: I’ve been here before, whippersnapper. I’ve got years of experience.

Kyle: Years of experience sinking Jaboats and using this office as your personal jizz receptacle.

Billy: Oh no you didn’t.

Kyle: Oh I sure as hell did. You think you’re that guy, the big ideas man. Sometimes outside the box is just a turd mine.

Billy: You can’t just piss on my ideas unilaterally.

Kyle: You can’t poop on Marchetti unilaterally.

Billy: Fine. I’ll feed your old man some bad clams and he can spray all over it with me.

Kyle: I’m going to lunch! Thanks for distracting me with your terrible ideas!

Billy: You’re welcome. Dick.

@@@@@@@@

Sharon: Many years ago, I made the difficult decision to give a child up for adoption. As it turns out, there was a copy that got stolen. Now, we’ve come full circle. I’m wearing a magical bathrobe made from the hide of a unicorn, while my daughter is a walking advertisement for oatmeal. Aunt Faith wanted to be here, but she’s in college and didn’t actually want to be here. Fortunately, you have the best uncle in the world in Noah. No one will ever get Aria to sleep as fast as he will.

Abby: I haven’t been a mother long, but I do have some advice. Lock the door before you indulge in afternoon delight. You’re welcome.

Noah: I can offer free babysitting. My venue apparently runs itself. Allie wanted to be here, but she got stuck in the lab. Apparently some mascara turned out extra sticky. Paramedics had to come. It was a whole thing.

Elena: Our off screen friendship has meant a great deal, and I’m just so happy to share this moment with you. I could blather on about motherhood, but everyone else has that covered. It… it gets a little creepy sometimes, to be honest. You won’t think it’s all sunshine and roses when your oversized infant comes home sporting a side part.

Sharon: Or with dirty limericks shaved into his back hair..

@@@@@@@

Jack: So we’ve reached the soap opera crisis stage where you waste time acting like a martyr and pushing everyone away.

Diane: I don’t like it any better than you, but the person writing our dialogue has zero imagination. 

Jack: Well, I flat out refuse to give up and neither should you. Kyle and I are going to prove your innocence.

Diane: Stuff your save-a-chick compulsion in a sack, mister. Phyllis was prancing around her own memorial dressed like an escapee from Dr. Evil’s harem. Somehow, I’m the only one who noticed. No one believes me.

Jack: I want to. I love you. If you won’t think about me, think about Kyle. You’ve already disappeared from his life once.

Diane: Low blow, fucknuts. Is it any better for him to see me in this sordid place, running illegal poker games and smuggling vape pens in for extra cash?

Jack: Um. What about Harrison? What should we tell him about his missing DeeDee?

Diane: I’m going to flounce now. Try not to run right out and act like an entitled jackass, okay?

@@@@@@

Michael: So, what’s the good word about Diane?

Chance: We want Stark, counselor. Where is he?

Michael: Do I look like I dabble in velour, pissant? Diane didn’t want him here in Genoa City. She has no contact with him. You know, it’s much easier to find a possible suspect when your head isn’t stuffed up your ass like it’s a Thanksgiving day turkey.

Christine: Diane could save everyone a lot of time and trouble and taxpayer money by pleading out. I could, maybe, get a couple of years shaved off her sentence. She’ll never beat our amazing evidence.

Michael: Of course. I will definitely discuss your offer with my client. I’m certain Diane will be amenable to throwing her life away for your convenience.

Chance: Is that sarcasm?

Michael: Good catch, Columbo. Oh, one more thing. Your amazing evidence is a sandcastle built on cotton candy with a tsunami named Michael Baldwin bearing down on it. Get your asses to high ground before I pants the GCPD and district attorney’s office in court.

Christine: You think I can’t find a jury as dumb as we are?

Michael: You don’t think a jury will look at Jeremy Stark’s rap sheet and Diane turning him in for money laundering and see him as a prime suspect with an excellent motive for framing her? Both Phyllis and Diane are his victims.

Chance: Jeremy and Diane were partners, Michael. Duh. In fact, I’m working on a theory that Diane married Stark while posing as Phyllis.

Michael: I worked on a similar theory this morning in the can. You know, Chris, I don’t miss this self-righteous, uptight, dimbulb side of you. What happened to fighting for the underdog and being a champion of the people?

Christine: I represent the people of Genoa City, and they do not give a tinker’s damn about any of that hippie crap. It’s my responsibility to prosecute bloodthirsty monsters like Diane, no matter how rich they are. I didn’t sell out like you.

Michael: Pardon?

Christine: Doing shady shit for Victor is one thing, but to take money to defend a killer? Hypothetically everyone deserves a defense, but Diane is icky.

Michael: Let me know when you stop cashing your paychecks, Lady Justice.

Chance: I need to get back to my office at the Athletic Club. I need to pensively stare at the crime scene while scratching my butt. Plus, I’ve been promised a free baked potato for lunch.

@@@@@@@

Sharon: It’s a shame. Nick never did learn to color inside the lines. Or on the page really.

Elena: Noah seems to be doing a good job. Nice purple puppy.

Noah: It’s called artistic license.

Elena: Yeah, that’s what Nate said when I asked about his hair. Zzzzz. What? I keep dropping off to sleep.

Abby: You sat next to Noah. Ah, shit. I’ll be right back.

Kyle: Sorry. I didn’t realize there was a private function. I was hangry.

Abby: It’s a baby shower for Mariah and Tessa and Aria. I was going to invite you, but I was afraid you’d bring Summer. No offense.

Kyle: None taken. I’m not in the mood for happy clappy stuff. I’ll just go someplace quiet. Billy might not see me if I slip into his left nostril. Damn, I’ve been made.

Mariah: You can’t sneak out of here with that high rise on your head.

Kyle: Really? I thought it was more like a disappointing mesa today.

Mariah: Hey, I’m sorry about your mom. Considering how many people Phyllis pissed off, it’s weird that they’re so hyper focused on Diane.

Kyle: You should apply to the local police department. You’ve been in friggin’ Oregon and have a better handle on this case than Fancy Pants Chance.

Mariah: How’s Summer? I’m just being polite, mind you.

Kyle: Understood. She’s grieving, of course. She’s also being a giant asshole who believes my mom killed her mom. If I can’t prove my mother’s innocence, my marriage is doomed.

Mariah: That is rather awkward.

Kyle: Let’s talk about happier things. Congratulations on Aria. My bouffant and I are so excited for you.

Mariah: Thanks. And thank you for all those baby clothes you and Summer shipped to us. Noah bought us a book and left the Sam’s Club clearance sale tag on it.

Kyle: He low key sucks.

Mariah: Come make fun of him with me. Only not too much, because Tessa and I don’t want to miss out on the free babysitting. Just ignore all the flowery nonsense about the deep bond between mothers and children.

Kyle: Halfheartedly deploys party pompadour.

@@@@@@@

Jack: I’m storming the barricades of justice and demanding a do-over on Diane’s bail hearing. It is my divine right as a wealthy male to insist on favorable treatment. Come correct, Christine.

Christine: We talked about this. Get it through your thick head that you can’t save every damsel in distress.

Jack: What if I obnoxiously and loudly offer to throw my money around like confetti in order to influence the inner workings of the legal system?

Michael: I’m going to do everything in my power to exonerate Diane. I am going to hand select each bit of Chance’s evidence, roll ‘em all up into a big ball of fluff and launch them into the fucking sun, where they will evaporate like a popcorn fart in the wind. But Diane has been deemed a flight risk for a reason.

Jack: Diane is not doing well.

Christine: Jail isn’t summer camp. It’s a suck ass place for people who suck and will just have to suck it up until trial. Michael, my door is always open if your client wants to confess. Ta ta.

Michael: She sucks.

@@@@@@@

Chelsea: Yay! I’m back baby.

Billy: Right? Imagine all the fools sitting at home with their guards down, thinking they’re in for a Buttbiscuit free week. I’m like athlete’s foot. By the way, how did you get past security?

Chelsea: I bribed them with dumplings. I’ll let you decide if that’s a euphemism or not.

Billy: Is that slippery shrimp I smell?

Chelsea: SLAP!

Billy: I was referring to the takeout from Yang’s.

Chelsea: I know. I just needed to do that. The urge was unbearable. So can you take a break?

Billy: Yeah. I’ll sit on this side of the desk though.

Chelsea: So how’s widdle Billy’s first day going?

Billy: Excellent. I got into a fight with Kyle but I kept my cool and didn’t bend him into a balloon animal.

Chelsea: I’m so proud of you. You’re just as cool as a cucumber and slick as a seagull’s ass.

Billy: I know. How’s your project going?

Chelsea: I am making a difference, William. I’m uplifting people. But, alas, fate has intervened in my mission.

Billy: What’s going on? Please try to relate it to my situation.

Chelsea: You have a situation. I have a holy mission. Daniel is all up in his feelings about Phyllis’ death. I don’t see what the big deal is. She was awful.

Billy: Ah, grief. I know it well. How does that make you feel?

Chelsea: Therapy speak? Eh, what the hell. At least you’re listening. I’m getting really impatient. Connor explained to me that it is probably socially unacceptable to approach Daniel on work related stuff. I had this amazing idea to incorporate his situation into my game. Like Frogger, but with an exploding ambulance.

Billy: Wow.

 

 

 

[MotherInLaw]

I haven’t been here in a while, and I’m sure this has been discussed, but OMG Sharon has gone overboard with fillers/Botox 😳

[MsMalin]

53 minutes ago, NinjaPenguins said:

Abby: I haven’t been a mother long, but I do have some advice. Lock the door before you indulge in afternoon delight. You’re welcome.

Something felt so wrong to me when she offered them new mother advice. It just felt so weird knowing she cheated on Chance within earshot of the baby.

53 minutes ago, NinjaPenguins said:

Plus, I’ve been promised a free baked potato for lunch.

OMG this killed me. I worked for a top financial institution. Occasionally they would.give us a free lunch of baked potato and bottled water. I called it the Russian special.

Edited April 22, 2023 by MsMalin

[SweePea59]

2 hours ago, Js Nana said:

Nadia's Theme - no special reason, just feeling nostalgic

I was gonna post Gina Romalotti singing it, but then I stumbled across - Snapper singing it!

 

 

Edited April 22, 2023 by SweePea59

[WhitneyWhit]

So I decided to rewatch todays episode with my husband, an actual attorney. Our conversation.

Him: So that’s her defense attorney?

Me: Yeah

Him: He acts like he doesn’t know why his client is being held other than she may have killed someone 

Me: No one really knows other than she bought the poison that was in her blood stream 

Him: And the autopsy confirmed the poison killed her? 
Me: Her body was burned in an ambulance fire 

Him: What? Then how do they know?

Me: There was a vile of blood

Him: Where did they get it 

Me: I guess the paramedics took it

Him: They can’t do that. And how did a glass vile survive a fire that burned a human body?

Me laughing at this point 

Him: So she’s the DA right? And the detective is there and they’re talking about this case just out in public like this? And she just told the suspect’s attorney to tell his client to plead guilty? He should have an immediate discussion with the judge. A change of venue to be requested.  How do they know she bought the poison 

Me: No one knows 

Him in disbelief. So, no autopsy, no body, a vile of blood, her husband took her money and can’t be found, no judge would issue an arrest warrant based on that.

Me laughing

Him: Please don’t make me watch this show again. 

[boes]

1 hour ago, WhitneyWhit said:

Me laughing

Him: Please don’t make me watch this show again. 

WhitneyWhit, I love your husband!  He's a keeper.

Yeah....I don't buy that ButtBiscuit was just trying to divert Kyle from worrying about his mom and Dummer.  ButtBiscuit has two settings - prick and smug prick - and he somehow managed to be on both those settings today in his scenes with Kyle.  I think that was confirmed when Kyle told him "thanks" for trying to divert him.  Even Le Bouffant isn't sure his Uncle BB wasn't just being his usual blathering blowhard.

Aww, how sweet that Chelsea brought him some food for lunch!  I wonder if she knows that ButtBiscuit and Phyllis always worked off their lunch with a little up and down on the elevator.  I guess it's her turn now.  I hope Jack deducts the price of elevator repair from his salary and gives those poor elevator repair people hazard pay.

Christine's got way too much gusto going after Diane for killing Phyllis than seems right to me.  Even if Diane actually did kill Phyllis, after all the crap Phyllis put Christine through over the years, including attempted vehicular homicide, it'd make more sense for Christine offering to plead Diane down to a 3rd degree misdemeanor with a punishment of picking up roadside trash for 30 days.  And even then, Christine should see she gets probation.

The hostile interchange between her and Michael seemed off to me.  Those two not only settled their differences ages ago, they've been good friends ever since.  I don't remember them going after each other personally like that in decades.

Chance is back at the Jazz Club?  Unless he's there for the beer nuts I don't get what he's looking for.  

As for the previews, I see that Phyllis got those blue veneers in her back-from-the-dead clothing pack from Target.  She looks just as genuinely horrifying as she did before her unfortunately short death.

[NinjaPenguins]

29 minutes ago, boes said:

Chance is back at the Jazz Club?  Unless he's there for the beer nuts I don't get what he's looking for.  

He’s looking for his ass. Chance was spotted two hands and a flashlight and still couldn’t find it

Listening to Christine and Chance hash out what they think is a “case” was amazing. And they did it all with a straight face! 
 

[Joimiaroxeu]

Quote

And how and when in the world did she become friends with the world's busiest doctor who is in a relationship?

One day out of the blue Tessa dropped by Elena's place and the two of them had tea. I think they talked about whether Tessa was ready to be a mother or something. They've been sorta galpals ever since.

And that makes me hope Elena will switch to talking to Tessa about her man troubles intead of to Audra.

Edited April 22, 2023 by Joimiaroxeu

[gingerella]

4 hours ago, SweePea59 said:

I was gonna post Gina Romalotti singing it, but then I stumbled across - Snapper singing it!

 

 

I feel like wretching when I listen to this schmaltz...oy...

[MollyB]

16 hours ago, Waldo13 said:

s Crispy still going to try to put the blame on Diane or just Stark.

My guess (not a spoiler) is that The Writer will have Phylth tell Dummer the whole truth with an emphasis on how scared she was of Stark and how much Diane needed/needs to be punished for all her past offenses to the fine ladies of GC.  She will easily convince Dummer that Diane must be convicted of her murder.  To do that, Dummer must keep themotherfromhell under wraps (perhaps the boat house is available?) throughout the trial.  Actually, Phylth has to stay hidden forever, because what she has done racks up a lot of felonies.  Oooooh, when they find Stark's body, will that unlock any investigative skillz in Chance? Or will he spend all his time trying to figure out how Diane killed him while she was in jail?

I fear we're going to spend the summer with a "Where's Waldo Phylth" plot.  I've already spotted her once in the jukebox of the Coffee House.  (top left album cover of a fat, orange lipped clown).  Where will she be lurking next?

 

16 hours ago, Waldo13 said:

Correct me if I’m wrong but Diane was arraigned so Christine would have to give Michael discovery of the evidence against her.

Yup. That's what an arraignment is for.  You're given your charges so you know what they think and can prove you did and all the evidence up to that point.  As evidence comes in (i.e.,tests or video) it is sent to the defense team.

Waldo13, WhitneyWhit and Husband, you're gonna have to join me at the OMG, Can't They Get a Legal Consultant table-I have a nice Napa Valley cabernet......

11 hours ago, NinjaPenguins said:

He’s looking for his ass. Chance was spotted two hands and a flashlight and still couldn’t find it

maybe a Rand McNalley special edition would help?

[Waldo13]

42 minutes ago, MollyB said:

My guess (not a spoiler) is that The Writer will have Phylth tell Dummer the whole truth with an emphasis on how scared she was of Stark and how much Diane needed/needs to be punished for all her past offenses to the fine ladies of GC.  She will easily convince Dummer that Diane must be convicted of her murder.  To do that, Dummer must keep themotherfromhell under wraps (perhaps the boat house is available?) throughout the trial.  Actually, Phylth has to stay hidden forever, because what she has done racks up a lot of felonies.  Oooooh, when they find Stark's body, will that unlock any investigative skillz in Chance? Or will he spend all his time trying to figure out how Diane killed him while she was in jail?

I fear we're going to spend the summer with a "Where's Waldo Phylth" plot.  I've already spotted her once in the jukebox of the Coffee House.  (top left album cover of a fat, orange lipped clown).  Where will she be lurking next?

 

Yup. That's what an arraignment is for.  You're given your charges so you know what they think and can prove you did and all the evidence up to that point.  As evidence comes in (i.e.,tests or video) it is sent to the defense team.

Waldo13, WhitneyWhit and Husband, you're gonna have to join me at the OMG, Can't They Get a Legal Consultant table-I have a nice Napa Valley cabernet......

maybe a Rand McNalley special edition would help?

If that scenario comes to fruition, then Summer❄️ goes to Summer❄️❄️❄️ because Crispy turns her into a felon and replacing Diane in jail beside loosing Kyle and Harrison. Is Daniel going to be kept in the dark because he won’t be as easy to manipulate than Summer❄️❄️❄️.  In essence Summer❄️❄️❄️ will be choosing Crispy over Kyle and Harrison. Maybe Summer❄️❄️❄️ and Crispy disappeared together killing two idiots with one stroke of the keyboard. 

[Js Nana]

16 hours ago, WhitneyWhit said:

no autopsy, no body, a vile of blood,

There was a body, but it was too badly damaged from the fire for an autopsy to be performed; because, of course, if it hadn't been to badly damaged for an autopsy, they would have discovered that it wasn't Phyllis. 

[Js Nana]

21 hours ago, babyhouseman said:

Maybe Billy should bring up that he slept with Summer.

The only way that storyline would have been OK with me was if Summer woke up believing that she and Billy had got together, only to realize that it had been a wishful thinking dream.

[Waldo13]

3 minutes ago, Js Nana said:

There was a body, but it was too badly damaged from the fire for an autopsy to be performed; because, of course, if it hadn't been to badly damaged for an autopsy, they would have discovered that it wasn't Phyllis. 

As I said before, total 🧀 because the body somehow some way has to be identified and a death certificate issued as to the independent identification of Crispy and a cause of death.  Crispy wasn’t crispy enough where neither teeth nor bone were destroyed.  Dental records and medical records could have been used to identify Crispy’s teeth or if she had any broken bones. Also bones could be used to determine hight and age. Without a death certificate, Micheal could use the argument of reasonable doubt that it wasn’t Crispy at all.  Once there is more info on how Chance tied Diane to the purchase of the poison, there will be more 🧀 served.  No matter, without the smoking gun of how Diane was able to give Crisply the poison,  Michael could argue more reasonable doubt.  

[Waldo13]

I was just reading an article that Victor (EB) has prostrate cancer and he’s currently receiving treatment.

I wouldn’t wish cancer on my worse enemy. 
 

God speed EB. 

[boes]

1 minute ago, Waldo13 said:

I was just reading an article that Victor (EB) has prostrate cancer and he’s currently receiving treatment.

I wouldn’t wish cancer on my worse enemy. 
 

God speed EB. 

Waldo13, if you go to Reel to Real: Backstage, Twitter, & All Media Dram-ugh

you'll be able to access EB's own video discussing what's happening with him.  It's very touching and informative.

[Js Nana]

So Chance thinks that Diane is in cahoots with JS, which I could actually believe if it's written as JS, unbeknownst to Phyllis, having formed a side-alliance with Diane so that he can disappear into a new identitywith his share of Phyllis' estate, leaving behind evidence that exonerates Diane in Phyllis' murder, and she can have two of her enemies eliminated from her life and have Jack eating out of her hand.  Unfortunately for Diane, JS was killed before he could leave the evidence that would exonerate her, and it gives Phyllis the chance to reappear with a story of how she was imprisoned by JS, but that it's been a week since she's seen him and she has no idea where he is, and the scene between Diane and Jack could have been caused by Diane realizing that it's taking a long time for the police to find the evidence JS was supposed to leave behind, so she suspects that he'd used her as a means to get his hands on a share of Phyllis' estate and escape into a new identity- - of course this scenario would make Diane seem incredibly gullible in believing anything JS told her.

32 minutes ago, Waldo13 said:

Crispy wasn’t crispy enough where neither teeth nor bone were destroyed.

but in Soap Opera Land, objective facts don't matter - you have to remember that a child on a soap opera can be a newborn one year, and going off to school the next.

[basiltherat]

It makes no sense that Stark would need to plot with Diane to get Phyl's money (is she rich?) when she could get BILLIONS from marrying Jack.  Plenty of dough for both of them and Jack is SO much easier to manipulate than Phyl.

And we all know that Phyllis will swear Snowflake to silence to punish Diane and thus bust Snowflake's marriage.

 

 

 

 

[Waldo13]

1 hour ago, basiltherat said:

It makes no sense that Stark would need to plot with Diane to get Phyl's money (is she rich?) when she could get BILLIONS from marrying Jack.  Plenty of dough for both of them and Jack is SO much easier to manipulate than Phyl.

And we all know that Phyllis will swear Snowflake to silence to punish Diane and thus bust Snowflake's marriage.

 

 

 

 

Further proof if Crispy is not happy nobody can be happy. Crispy demands loyalty, love, and respect. Nobody else matters and she doesn’t really love her children unless they are compliant to her wishes. 
 

Yes, I know that the monkeys with a keyboard are full of shit and write for the sake of writing but I can’t keep putting my brain in a jar to watch.  The story lines that contain technical issues leave a lot to be desired but the characters are plausible. I’ve met most of their types in real life.  

[Skarzero]

17 hours ago, Joimiaroxeu said:

And that makes me hope Elena will switch to talking to Tessa about her man troubles intead of to Audra.

But if that happened, how would the show be able to make Adura look super cunning and so smart to us? 😃

Seriously what purpose is this BS plot supposed to serve? Audra has to know that Nate hasn't really blinked twice at her & likely won't appreciate her meddling with his  home girlfriend & work girlfriend. 

Not to mention Nate having 3 women simp for him is wild to me anyway. Maybe Victoria makes sense since she's more arrogant/insufferable than he is. But still...in between this, Phyllis being a saint to people she's fucked with upon death, the "strong case" against Diane....I don't think even the writers of Star Trek Picard or Discovery ask me to suspend my belief this much. 

[boes]

3 hours ago, Skarzero said:

Seriously what purpose is this BS plot supposed to serve? Audra has to know that Nate hasn't really blinked twice at her & likely won't appreciate her meddling with his  home girlfriend & work girlfriend. 

I don't have any clear idea of what the hell Audra's purpose really is, and I suspect the writers don't either.  They dropped the "old boyfriend Noah" storyline pretty fast, then her affair with Tucker came and went, then she gave Natey Nate Nate Nate the eye and recently, Boffant Boy too.  Now this friendship with Elena that only manages to make Elena look like an idiot.  Oh, also, she speaks to Victoria almost exclusively in double entrendres and "wink wink" comments that should really have her transferred to housekeeping instead of keeping a COO job.

All I'm sure of, right now with her, is that she wants Nate's job a lot more than she wants anything else.  Though how she's going to get it by alienating Victoria and busting up Nate and Elena is beyond my understanding.

[SweePea59]

5 hours ago, boes said:

I don't have any clear idea of what the hell Audra's purpose really is, and I suspect the writers don't either.

The fact that they don't know what to do with her and have been bouncing her around from story to story like a pinball speaks more to the fact that they don't know what they're doing with the show period. If it was just once then you figure they changed direction with a story line or character development. They've had her all over the place and still she seems to not really be a part of any story. She can't indefinitely be snarking at Mop. If she disappeared tomorrow it wouldn't make any difference to any character or story.

[Chatty Cake]

At least Audra has some pep in her step even if we don’t know what she’s up to.  More interesting than Mop with her monotone seductive scene. More fun to watch than Crispy losing her mind. Speaking of Crispy, I saw a Y and R Facebook group advertised on my page with a pic of Crispy. The comments were all complimentary about the love of MS in her role. I don’t get it. 
I didn’t mind Billy scenes with Kyle but then they ruined it by bringing Chelsea in. The actress is pregnant right? I laughed at the giant bag of take out. Maybe she’ll need to leave for treatment soon. 
The baby shower would have been cute if there had been some people there. I noticed Elena livened up with Noah and wonder if they’ll go there later. Nate and Audra, Noah and Elena. Even though Noah isn’t exactly dynamic, I’m glad they didn’t totally throw him away.

[NinjaPenguins]

I honestly think Audra just loves trolling people. Genoa City offers an embarrassment of riches when it comes to easy marks who are ripe for a little shit-stirring. Can’t say I’m entirely convinced she’s interested in Nate; I think she likes nudging the sordid Victoria situation along just to see what happens when it blows up. If Audra is sincerely hot for the Side Part, then she’s a lot dumber than she’s come across thus far. On the other hand, she apparently thought Noah was appealing.

Looks like Crispy finally washed the blood off, if the previews weren’t showing a dumbass dream sequence. Wouldn’t it be a hoot if she buried Stark in her grave? I mean, it’s not plausible, but Crispy apparently possesses powers that defy time and space. She must be a straight up assassin to come away from a scissor fight with only a few artfully placed smears of blood on her. Crispy probably had a taser hidden in her velour.

[MsMalin]

2 hours ago, Chatty Cake said:

Speaking of Crispy, I saw a Y and R Facebook group advertised on my page with a pic of Crispy. The comments were all complimentary about the love of MS in her role. I don’t get it. 

It seems to me that the group here frequently has differing opinions than other groups. I am constantly scratching my head at some of the things that are said in other boards.

[Kemper]

3 hours ago, MsMalin said:

It seems to me that the group here frequently has differing opinions than other groups. I am constantly scratching my head at some of the things that are said in other boards.

Agree. I am amazed/horrified at the over-the-top Phyllis love that drive other sites. It is like we are looking at completely different actresses. She would appear to be true, honest and brave. And terribly mistreated and dumped on. 

[MollyB]

1 hour ago, Kemper said:

She would appear to be true, honest and brave. And terribly mistreated and dumped on. 

Kind of how her character is being treated in this fake-death story.

[Waldo13]

4 hours ago, MsMalin said:

It seems to me that the group here frequently has differing opinions than other groups. I am constantly scratching my head at some of the things that are said in other boards.

That group is bots bots and nothing but bots. Beside, our opinions are the only ones that matter 😜. 

[One Tough Cookie]

On 4/21/2023 at 8:13 PM, NinjaPenguins said:

Michael: I worked on a similar theory this morning in the can.

I.AM.DEAD.  Truly, I had tears running down my face.THANKS

The vision of Michael sitting on the can--I'm still laughing!!!!!!

Edited April 24, 2023 by One Tough Cookie

[Js Nana]

6 hours ago, Kemper said:

I am amazed/horrified at the over-the-top Phyllis love that drive other sites.

The way you know if a site is the creation of some actor's publicist is if it gushes with praise for that actor - while I'm very much not pro "Diane," I do think Susan Walters is a fine actor, and while I'm more in favor of "Phyllis," I am not a fan of Michelle Stafford's acting style.

[Js Nana]

22 hours ago, Skarzero said:

I don't think even the writers of Star Trek Picard . . . ask me to suspend my belief this much. 

I was OK with Season 3 right up until episode 9, when Jack is revealed as having inherited some kind of Borg-gene from Jean Luc, and I was so disgusted, that I literally shouted "Bogus!!!" at the screen and shut it off, vowing never to watch another episode, but I did watch episode 10.  As a viewer of the original series during it's first run, I find myself wishing that the writers would focus more on the story and much, much less on CGI pyrotechnics; although the original series had the cheesiest costumes and special effects going, I was willing to suspend disbelief because the stories were so good that even the absurdity of The Devil in the Dark (3/9/1967) could be forgiven.

[Waldo13]

2 hours ago, Js Nana said:

I was OK with Season 3 right up until episode 9, when Jack is revealed as having inherited some kind of Borg-gene from Jean Luc, and I was so disgusted, that I literally shouted "Bogus!!!" at the screen and shut it off, vowing never to watch another episode, but I did watch episode 10.  As a viewer of the original series during it's first run, I find myself wishing that the writers would focus more on the story and much, much less on CGI pyrotechnics; although the original series had the cheesiest costumes and special effects going, I was willing to suspend disbelief because the stories were so good that even the absurdity of The Devil in the Dark (3/9/1967) could be forgiven.

With Star Wars, Star Trek (my favorite all time favorite is “The City on the Edge of Tomorrow”), Ironman, Terminator, Westworld,  and other action movies “we” can suspend disbelief and just watch because basically they are just fantasies.  As I said, soap opera characters are based on real people (many of which I’ve known) so it’s more character driven and how they react to other people and curtain situation.  Their reactions are plausible and I even accept the concept of the rapid aging of young characters. Where I have to draw the line is where the monkeys with a keyboard don’t let the truth get in the way of a good story. In other words, they ask us to believe things that do not ring true.
 

 

[gingerella]

@NinjaPenguins, out here all week, everyday, doing the Lord's work for us...xo

 

[MsMalin]

15 hours ago, Waldo13 said:

That group is bots bots and nothing but bots. Beside, our opinions are the only ones that matter 😜. 

I feel so at home here and very happy for the snarkiness. 

[SweePea59]

I think the reason that good sci-fi like Star Trek works is because basically the stories are about the human condition. When Worf was quantum leaping after his return from the bat'leth tournament in ST:TNG's "Parallels", (one of my fave eps), although the episode was about quantum leaping, it was more about his reactions and what he was going through than the perhaps very real sci-fi concept, (and yeah, even though he's Klingon not human). And that's one of the problems with what's happened to Y&R. Crazy shtuff happens on the show. Okay, but where is the human element of how the characters are being emotionally affected? Soaps should have more in-depth story telling because soaps tell stories about emotions. They're not action films. They're not psychological thrillers. Those are different genres and soaps are their own genre of emotional drama. And the characters have rich histories that should be affecting them as they are today. With Y&R anymore, the characters have gone through things that we've witnessed over the years and now they're written acting out of character and as though all that we've seen them go through never happened and had no effect on them.

Another Y&R problem is that instead of showing us what's happening they just have characters standing around telling each other something happened. That's a recap, not a show.

Good story telling about the human condition could take place in the old west, outer space or Genoa City.

 

Edited April 24, 2023 by SweePea59

[Runningwild]

Does anyone else find Billy’s voice annoying? I just find him so repulsive in every way. His voice is the worst.

[Julyolo]

Responding to the positive spin about Phyllis on some other soap sights, I can only offer the experience of my youngest son, who was a paid employee of the show BIG BROTHER in the premiere year (2000), and posted favorable comments on multiple sites as his job. I'm giving a failing grade in chemistry for the Lily and Danny Jr. post sex boudoir scene. Just yuck, he looked seriously unwell next to her. Grief is not that physically debilitating. Lily does look good with her shorter hair though. He looked like he crawled out of a dumpster.  "Save the Insane" Captain Billy rambling on to Kyle about protecting his own life, and not getting diverted by the dilemmas of Diane? The guy that ignored Lily's needs to cater to "Our Poster Girl of the Perpetually Needy," Chelsea? I am beginning to wonder if the actors on Y&R have even an inkling as to the meaning of character continuity? Billy should have laughed, and thrown that script back on the desk of whoever wrote it, IMO. Why are Jack and Ashley even fighting anymore? He needed to give Ashley the heave ho when he decided to move forward in his life with Diane. He has been well aware (for quite a while) that his sister has been up to her armpits stirring a cauldron with her coven. Then, on the week's previews from Friday, Ashley, the self appointed font of wisdom that criticizes Jack for making impulsive moves, asks Tucker to move in with her. Wonder where they will go to discuss that. Crimson Lights or Society?

Edited April 24, 2023 by Julyolo

[gingerella]

6 hours ago, SweePea59 said:

Another Y&R problem is that instead of showing us what's happening they just have characters standing around telling each other something happened. That's a recap, not a show.

And if they're going to do that, then they need to hire @NinjaPenguins because she's the best recrapper on the planet...

[boes]

1 hour ago, Runningwild said:

Does anyone else find Billy’s voice annoying? I just find him so repulsive in every way. His voice is the worst.

You mean the way it whistles out of his nose?  Oh yeah, I find everything about him annoying as well, and I'm not just nose-whistling Dixie-I-mean-ButtBiscuit.

[Js Nana]

On 4/22/2023 at 5:26 PM, basiltherat said:

Phyl's money (is she rich?)

"Phyllis" showed up on Y&R in 1994, and in the almost 29 years since, she's accumulated financial assets from a variety of business ventures she's been involved in, so I'm guessing her estate at least approaches the "never have to worry about money for the rest of your life" category, and why losing jobs didn't send her into a "where's my next meal coming from" panic, and who knows what assets JS had hidden away in various off-shore accounts he might maintain under different identities.

[Js Nana]

Fantasy Phyllis-Diane-JS scenario:

JS wants two things, to cause Diane to be sentenced to life in prison and to be able to leave town with as much loot as he can get his hands on and disappear into a new identity, while Phyllis wants Diane to be gone from her life forever and Diane wants both Phyllis and JS to be gone from her life forever.

To accomplish his goals, JS presents himself to Phyllis as a necessary evil in accomplishing her goal of ridding her life of Diane, and to Diane  as a necessary evil in accomplishing her goal of ridding her life of Phyllis and JS both.

JS wins a deranged Phyllis over to a plot that involves their marrying, faking her death in a manner that implicates Diane, her disappearing into a new identity, and him inheriting half of her estate as payment for making it all happen; and he wins a desperate Diane over to a plot that involves her depositing a tidy sum of cash into his off-shore account as payment for his talking Phyllis into faking her own death to get back at her, and then disappearing into a new identity after leaving evidence that would reveal that Phyllis isn't dead, completely discrediting her in everyone's eyes, especially Summer, Daniel and Jack.

Of course, JS's plan had always been to disappear from GC after leaving evidence that revealed Diane'deposit of cash into his off-shore account, thus implicating them both in Phyllis' "death," but he didn't count on Phyllis thwarting his plan by not leaving town, and he certainly didn't foresee his death at her hands.

[Sake614]

Ugh. I made the mistake of watching todays show. There wasn’t a single rootable character among them. Ashley screaming that Diane is guilty and Jack will lose everything. Jack screaming that Ashley should move. Billy and Chelsea playing tonsil hockey. I completely forgot that Billy and Lilly were ever a couple so it took me a while to figure out why there was awkwardness at society. 

I think I’m out again. 

[One Tough Cookie]

4 hours ago, Julyolo said:

Grief is not that physically debilitating

I respectfully disagree both from personal and observation of others. Everyone handles grief in their own way, some people bounce back, some people's lives are never the same.

[NinjaPenguins]

Billy: Noooo comment, bro. The family requests privacy at this time. How is it you dipshits are just getting onto this story? How did you get a direct line to the co-CEO’s office anyway? You found it written on a bus station wall in Kenosha? Yeah, well, you’re not gonna find a good time talking to me. Buh bye.

Kyle: Have you been spending the morning the same way I have?

Billy: Nah, I always rub one out during my morning constitutional.

Kyle: Mariah is coming back early from maternity leave to help us out.

Billy: Fantastic. All hands on deck.

Kyle: Mariah isn’t really swinging that way current- oh, deck.

@@@@@@

Jack: Well, have you gotten a line on Stark’s money? I know you’re apparently a forensic accounting expert, but have you considered the obvious move of looking overseas? I gotta go. There’s an icy draft in here.

Ashley: Ready for round two of pointless bickering?

Jack: I was born ready, you toxic Newman ball washer. However, I’m busy trying to stick my nose into Diane’s legal defense.

Ashley: You didn’t go to law school, you walking conclusion to a Hallmark movie.

Jack: I’m a very rich man. People will treat me like an expert no matter what.

Ashley: All you’re doing is preventing Diane from taking responsibility for her actions.

Jack: It’s on like Donkey Kong.

@@@@@@@

Daniel: No, no!

Lily: It was just a bad dream.

Daniel: …

Lily: I’m here for you and I’m only wearing a bra. It’s okay.

@@@@@@

Victor: It is strange being here.

Tucker: You are 782 years old. It’s strange for you to be anywhere.

Victor: This is where Phyllis met her tragic end, k?

Tucker: It’s a place to absorb bourbon like a sponge and listen to decent music. I’m sure Phyllis would be just as unsentimental if I was a well grilled Tucker filet.

Victor: I find this contract pleasing and have therefore signed it in blood. Prick your finger and do the same.

Tucker: You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?

Victor: I don’t give a damn how I feel.

Tucker: That makes no sense.

Victor: I don’t enjoy things. I endure them. When it comes to business, I am ice cold. Once you sign that contract, McCall will be mine. Mwah ha ha.

Tucker: That is the point of a contract.

Victor: It will thrive, of course. I may have to rename it.

Tucker: Call it Jiggly Balls International for all I care. I’m done with it and this one horse town.

Victor: Are you looking for sympathy?

Tucker: Not from your blighted soul. Well, I need to read this again, make sure you didn’t slip in any poison pills. Too soon?

Victor: Youhaveanicedaynow.

@@@@@@@@@

Ashley: The whole family will be flushed down the human toilet that is Diane.

Jack: Are you saying you believe she’s capable of murder? She was barely able to pull off a fake jewel heist.

Ashley: She’s capable of anything to get what she wants - a position in our company, your ring on her finger, being able to swan about the manse… she just had to get Phyllis out of the way.

Jack: Have I been taking crazy pills? There was never a choice between Bluetooth and Diane. Phyllis and I were through. She got fired by her kids for being a wrecking ball.

Ashley: I’m no Phyllis fan, but you were a total meanie to her after Diane returned from the dead. You pushed her away.

Jack: I’m sorry I wasn’t kinder to an obsessive freak and compulsive cheater who married the criminal seeking revenge on Diane.

Ashley: All Diane’s fault. You’re so blind, Jackie.

Jack: If spite was helium, you could personally blow up a balloon that would fill one of Billy’s nostrils.

@@@@@@@

Billy: You’ve been burning the candle at both ends.

Kyle: I could riff off that cliche with a tasteless Phyllis joke, but Summer has sucked all the fun out of that. I’ll just say I’m happy to help my parents any way I can, even if it’s just inexplicably handling publicity.

Billy: Summer’s still being an asshole, huh?

Kyle: Always. She can’t even look at me, no matter how high and deep I pile my hair. The only solution is to prove Mom’s innocence. Then Summer will realize what a dumb bunny she’s been.

Billy: I’m going to give you some advice based on my many years of failure and self-sabotage.

Kyle: I’ve only got 15 minutes until my next conference call, Uncle Billy.

Billy: You can take my advice or leave it on the lawn like an old pissed on sofa with a cardboard FOR FREE propped up next to it. You can shove it up your ass and to the left for all I care. But you’re handling Summer wrong.

Kyle: What more can I do? She stays in her room unless it’s to spend time with Harrison. He’s the one who’s really suffering here. I can’t force her attentions to be directed at me.

Billy: She grieves in her own way.

Kyle: No shit, Sherlock. What’s your point?

Billy: Separate rooms can become separate lives. A gap can become a chasm. A butt can become a biscuit. Why aren’t you writing this down? It’s fucking gold.

Kyle: So you’re innovative idea is to keep doing what I’m doing.

Billy: Only harder.

@@@@@@

Lily: Can you remember your dream?

Daniel: I was outside the coffee shop on a warm spring day, feeding my unicorn pellets of pure joy. I happened to look down the street. There was my mom, still alive. But… god, she smiled at me and instead of teeth, her gums were lined with blueberries. There was just all this blueberry juice dripping down her chin.

Lily: Yikes.

Daniel: Suddenly I was at my house in Savannah. No one else was there, and the place was bigger somehow. I opened one door and was swamped by a mess of cantaloupes. Another door led to a long hallway with hundreds of doors leading to more hallways. Summer was there, trying to sell pot to a border collie on roller skates.

Lily: I used to dream about my dad after he died. I’d open the Silver Briefcase of Righteous Justice and Neil would pop out of it like a jack in the box.

Daniel: I don’t feel so alone when I’m with someone who knows exactly what I’m going through. Plus this grief sex is pretty good stuff.

Lily: Sometimes you’ll just have a moment when you think your parent is still there. Maybe you hear a rooster crowing or smell charcoal briquettes. Or sometimes you’ll see someone who looks just like them and for a split second you’re ready to whip out a boomstick and handle that zombie apocalypse shit. Soon those moments become heartwarming instead of painful.

Daniel: I need coffee.

@@@@@@@

Audra: Interesting.

Tucker: What’s that?

Audra: You’ve lowered your turtleneck to crew neck. That’s a distress signal, isn’t it?

Tucker: I dunno. Maybe. Whatever.

Audra: Show me on this doll where Ashley hurt you.

Tucker: I miss the old days, the rush of signing new artists and producing albums. It’s over, man.

Audra: You miss the sleazy rush of getting a lot of profit out of someone else’s creativity and hard work.

Tucker: Same diff. Say, what are your feelings on pity sex?

@@@@@@

Ashley: Diane is a murdering murderer who killed Phyllis out of jealousy. She was there the day the music died. She carved the iceberg that sank the Titanic, Jack! She is a ruinous hoebag and vile plague upon our lives.

Kyle: Fuck you, Aunt Ashley.

Jack: Can’t you see the pain he’s in? You’re talking trash about his mother. Can’t you even summon a sliver of human decency for your own nephew?

Ashley: Who told him to fall out of the wrong vagina? Not me.

@@@@@@

Lily: Getting takeout, I see.

Billy: Hanging out with Daniel, I see. How are you holding up?

Daniel: Eh.

Billy: Warning. The press has finally realized that Diane is accused of murdering Phyllis. Guess they sat on it until Leanna Love published her article. Anyway, watch out for press vultures.

Daniel: Thanks.

Lily: The PR department will craft a statement on your behalf.

Daniel: I can handle it.

Lily: Let me do this for you.

Daniel: It’s hard to say no to her. Her bra is very persuasive.

Billy: Don’t I know it. Well enjoy your meal and don’t worry about reeking of sex. I’mma leer at Lily’s sparkly cake while y’all walk away.

@@@@@@

Audra: That’s a very good contract Victor signed. You’ll make out like a bandit.

Tucker: I am a bandit. I stole that motherfucker’s pen like a boss.

Audra: Cute. So that paper is your ticket to freedom. You can do anything you want, go anyplace…

Tucker: I’m more of a glass half empty sort of guy. Fuck this town and everyone in it. I’m outta here.

Audra: You are more of a big city guy. Although one might mistake Genoa City for a metropolis, what with all the big corporate players doing business here.

Tucker: It’s a village made up of all the idiots other villages have lost. You know, you used to be my right hand. Let’s blow this pop stand together and go become warlords in some tropical paradise.

Audra: I have an important job at Newman. You don’t seem to appreciate what an absolute treasure trove of smooth brains you could have at your disposal if you pushed the right buttons.

Tucker: Working for Victoria doesn’t blow chunks? Come on.

Audra: She’s like a little wind-up toy. Genoa City has actually grown on me. There are so many fascinating people here and the ineptitude of law enforcement is legendary. White collar crime should be a cakewalk, if it comes to that.

Tucker: Working the angles, huh.

Audra: The student must one day become the master.

Tucker: You’re just like all the other poopyheads around here. Ashley and Devon pushed me away because they think there are greener pastures out there. Nobody wants to till my fields filled with cow flops.

Audra: Manpain is an ugly look. You might want to stop throwing pity parties. They’re worse than any bicentennial gala.

Tucker: I will pretend I’m rejecting you even though your body language has been telling me to fuck off all evening.

@@@@@@@

Billy: I’ve got food. Let’s have a picnic under the stars.

Chelsea: Two meals in one day? How will you maintain your assless figure?

Billy: I ran into Lily and Daniel.

Chelsea: How is Daniel? Did you share the good news that salvation from grief is only possible through me?

Billy: He was in a sex daze. It would have been impossible to reach him. You know, I’m happy for Lily. She’s moving on with Daniel, so I can absolve myself of being a selfish prick who was surgically attached to your hip.

Chelsea: Look at you, being all faux mature and pretending to feel guilty about aiding me in healing mankind.

Billy: I learned it from the beautiful goddess sitting across from me.

Chelsea: Connor is spending the night at the ranch, so there’s room in my stable for a stallion. Tee hee. I can’t believe I said that.

Billy: Tonight our egos shall become one. Will humanity survive? I don’t care.

@@@@@@@

Jack: This is untenable. If you can’t handle being in the same house as the woman I love and think you have the right to forbid it, well, why don’t you get to steppin’, Ash? There’s the door. I really don’t give a damn if it hits you where the good lord split you.

Ashley: I’m so fucking tired of you telling me to move! You hypocrite. You whine about one little date with Tucker like he slaps nuns, but you have no qualms about moving a killer into OUR house.

Jack: I will not have turtlenecks in this house! I won’t take it from Billy, and I won’t take it from your chew toy!

Ashley: How do any of us know we won’t be Diane’s next victim? How will you feel when the media finally realizes a bunch of rich assholes have a sordid murder scandal tearing them apart. God knows I’ve called them with plenty of anonymous tips.

Jack: Your bitterness is peeling the wallpaper.

Ashley: Why don’t you fly the fuck outta here? This is my house too. My birthright. Go buy a house next to whatever prison Diane ends up in. Have your sweet little jailhouse wedding. Will you be registering with the Wisconsin Department of Corrections?

Jack: Excuse the fuck out of me?

Ashley: Wait until the Jabot board hears about this! You’ll be out on your stupid ass in no time flat. Yeah, I’m going to use your personal crisis to fuck you over. Sucker.

@@@@@@

Daniel: That was awkward.

Lily: What? Running into Billy? It’s really no biggie.

Daniel: I thought I saw Mom peeking out of one of his nostrils. It was just the lighting I guess.

Lily: I saw a really good IMAX documentary on grief in his nasoplex. What you’re experiencing is perfectly normal.

Daniel: You’ve been really generous listening to me talk about Heather. Go ahead and release some Billy Abbott angst.

Lily: Can’t say I have any. Billy and I had our moment, it was beautiful and then it was done and dusted.

Daniel: Any regrets? I mean, it is Billy.

Lily: Nope. Looking back is such a bummer. I prefer to live in the now.

Daniel: I wish I could do that.

Lily: I think it comes from being a cancer survivor. Life is too precious to waste on exes or remorse for killing your brother’s wife and child or a spectacularly wretched marriage to a cow thief.

Daniel: Can’t you wallow in something? I mean, you’re not a sociopath. Right?

Lily: We’re just different. You want to know why something goes wrong and analyze every detail. I just keep merrily skipping through life with horse blinders on.

Daniel: I guess that’s why we’re so good together.

@@@@@@

Kyle: Summer, you don’t have to say anything. In fact, 9 out of 10 people wish you wouldn’t. Are you in there thinking about Chance? I get it. He’s so dreamy. But I’m your husband. I want to help you stop being such a crusading asshole. Let me hold you close to my bouffant. It’s warm and thick and comforting, like a fleece throw.

Mrs. Martinez: You’re in the wrong wing again.

@@@@@@@

Billy: Remember, if I start to inhale you, the safe word is Jaboat.

Chelsea: GASP!