S24.E01: Premiere

[OnceSane]

Quote

Airline pilot Peter Weber begins his search for love, meeting 30 accomplished women eager to catch his eye; on the first group date, nine women get flight training; Hannah Brown returns to host the second group date.

Airs January 6, 2020.

[seasons]

Is this where we go for live chat tonight? 

howard stern said that tonight's episode is awesome. He got an advanced copy.

[ECM1231]

As much as I like live chatting with everyone, I'll probably just record and start to watch midway through so as to zip though commercials. There are 3 contestants who are flight attendants. 

[tennisgurl]

All aboard the hot mess express!

Edited January 7, 2020 by tennisgurl

[tennisgurl]

This just reminds me that Hannah has really questionable taste in men. 

Nobody's mentioned virginity so far, so I already like it more than Coltons first episode. 

Oh my God, what is going on in those opening scenes? Does a girl disappear or something?!

[JenE4]

“Let’s have a cheers” to an “amazing journey”! Welcome back, gang!

[saber5055]

I'm reading here while I watch AGT because you guys rock and are much more fun than the actual show.

[JenE4]

Hannah Ann looks like a contender.

Tammy is most likely to stab you in your sleep.

Missed this blonde’s name with the sob-story of the year.

[zenithwit]

I think I'm going to need that barf bag if Peter says "find my co-pilot" one more time.

[JenE4]

When grandma writes you a letter of recommendation.

Peter looking at Hannah Ann like 😍

Victoria P got some harp string music out of the limo. That means she’ll make it far.

3 flight attendants with a “unique” angle. Lots of others with flight-themed entrances, but the peddle-plane wins. There is NOT someone in that suitcase, right?!? I’m tiny, and  I don’t think I can fit in a suitcase.

[nutty1]

35 minutes and I’m tired of the pilot/airplane references already. 

[tennisgurl]

I mean, airplane references are better and less creepy than the constant virgin references from last season at least. 

Lord, there are enough flight attendants build their own plane.

[SHD]

Ugh...do those girls think gross double meaning jokes are charming? Blech.

[tennisgurl]

So this girl comes from a universe where people find blindfolding someone and kissing them without telling them is charming, and NOT creepy?

[SHD]

Wow, that screaming girl sounded just like that video of the screaming goat.

[JenE4]

Round 5?!? They only had sex in the  windmill twice, madam! 

oh, we’ve hit the crazies.

Ashley P the emotional support cow for the first impression rose—the cow, not the girl. “It’s a pony!!” Lol! These idiots.

Peter remembers meeting Kelly?!? Wow. Oh, they have a synchronized dance!! That’s some extra credit points right there. And the girls are shattered. 

...Then Hannah B sashays in and they turn to dust and blow away.

[tennisgurl]

First impression rose goes to the cow. 

[JenE4]

Hannah B is here! “Is that legal?!?” Haha. Oh, she’s returning his “wings of love.”

[nutty1]

7 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Round 5?!? They only had sex in the  windmill twice, madam! 

Nope. It was 4 times. Hannah corrected that at the ATFR. 

[JenE4]

Oh, dear. 5 seconds in and I’m already dreading the BFF relationship of Ms Risk It For The Biscuit and Miss Lookin Like a Dime Fifty.

[hyacinth]

I noticed that Peter would hug the women and then eye them up and down as they walked away.   I remember reading a relationship columnist once who said that some men spark to a few women and some men spark to many women, and you want one of the former.   I think Peter's a sparker.   We shall see what unfolds.      

[JenE4]

Is that a painting of a field of vaginas growing in the valley of a mountain range? Oh, well, my first impression is that Hannah is the front runner, despite her shoddy artwork.

[tennisgurl]

Good lord, that one brought handcuffs...Peter if you need help blink twice...

[StatMom]

I wonder this every season: when asked if “I can steal you for a second” or some such, is the bachelor bound by some production rule to acquiesce? They never seem to refuse.

[JenE4]

Oh, damn! Trying to confront Hannah as the “villain,” but she was polite and didn’t fight back so...now what? {blank stares} This is unprecedented. Hannah is 100% my  favorite now.

[dirtypop90]

I thought Hannah was a lot with the kissing. But I see Peter is about to top her and full on makeup with everyone in front of the other contestants. Hard to believe he's serious about anything but getting laid.

Hannah's appearance was a waste of time. Peter isn't passing up being with one of these hot women throwing themselves at him for her. I don't care how many feels he has.

 

[EllenB]

I'm at the point of wondering if I'll make it through all three hours without drinking myself into a coma.

[JenE4]

Victoria F is by far the most annoying. She’s gotta go. And now she’s crying. What the hell was her joke? Or did she not get it out during either attempt? Imagining this girl on the comedy club circuit. I have a joke... {breaks into tears}

Edited January 7, 2020 by JenE4
Wrong Victoria

[Ohwell]

Peter is such a dork, it's just hard to watch this.  I think the young pretty Hannah is the frontrunner.  I'll check back in a few weeks.

[JenE4]

Of course Hannah Ann got the FIR. I called her as contender as soon as we saw her at her family dinner. 

[dirtypop90]

2 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Victoria P is by far the most annoying. She’s gotta go. And now she’s crying. What the hell was her joke? Or did she not get it out during either attempt? Imagining this girl on the comedy club circuit. I have a joke... {breaks into tears}

I think that's Victoria F. Unfortunately she's one of the few I think he has chemistry with.

I think Hannah Ann is beautiful but they've kissed multiple times and I feel nothing.

3 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

Peter is such a dork, it's just hard to watch this.  I think the young pretty Hannah is the frontrunner.  I'll check back in a few weeks.

Yep. These women are beautiful with real careers (most are). Hard to believe they are about to fall for Peter.

[JenE4]

4 minutes ago, dirtypop90 said:

I think that's Victoria F. Unfortunately she's one of the few I think he has chemistry with.

I think Hannah Ann is beautiful but they've kissed multiple times and I feel nothing.

Yep. These women are beautiful with real careers (most are). Hard to believe they are about to fall for Peter.

Oh, you’re right. Victoria P is a pretty blonde who just got a rose.

[SallyAlbright]

Victoria F is already a standout for being annoying. That's hard to do on the first night when they're all annoying. 

Madison seems okay, I like sporty girls. 

[tennisgurl]

“My life isn’t worth living if this guy I met for five seconds doesn’t hand me a flower!!!” 

[SallyAlbright]

Does ANYONE know what "literally" means? My brain is (figuratively) exploding...

[tennisgurl]

Well here’s to seeing some of these ladies on the last few increasingly sad weeks of Bachelor in Paradise, as I desperately try to remember any of their names! 

[Ohwell]

I hope the rejects at least got fed.

Edited January 7, 2020 by Ohwell

[Kiss my mutt]

Good Lord! What’s with the crying over someone you just met? 

[JenE4]

First week of dates? This isn’t how this works.

My 11-year-old wanted me to write that she would go on this show just to be the first person to not accept a rose on night 1. So, um, judge my parenting for letting her watch this—but at least she’s smart enough to not fall for the Right Reasons brainwashing.

[clubsauce]

I literally don’t think any of them know what literally literally means. And I mean that figuratively. Literally.

[nutty1]

Hannah B almost seems mature compared to some of these crazies!

[saber5055]

1 minute ago, Kiss my mutt said:

Good Lord! What’s with the crying over someone you just met?  missing out on trips to Europe and the Bahamas and being on an all-expenses vacation for a month or so. And maybe getting a Neil Lane ring and your own reality show.

I fixed it for you.

You're welcome.

[tennisgurl]

The more wine I drink the more this all makes sense. 

This group sure is gorgeous, like possibly even more so than usual.

[Ms Blue Jay]

51 minutes ago, hyacinth said:

I noticed that Peter would hug the women and then eye them up and down as they walked away.   I remember reading a relationship columnist once who said that some men spark to a few women and some men spark to many women, and you want one of the former.   I think Peter's a sparker.   We shall see what unfolds.      

You said it much classier than I did.  Basically I said to myself that Peter is a horndog from minute 1 and it's hilarious.

I LOVE Tammy, though I already see she's not popular here!

45 minutes ago, StatMom said:

I wonder this every season: when asked if “I can steal you for a second” or some such, is the bachelor bound by some production rule to acquiesce? They never seem to refuse.

We saw him refuse once.  (Edited to add her name:  He refused for the woman named NATASHA).

Did you guys catch someone saying they're here for "the flight reasons"?  I think it was the first flight attendant.  I thought you guys might like that.

Edited January 7, 2020 by Ms Blue Jay

[JenE4]

Teacups dramatic re-enactment!

[hyacinth]

I love the female pilots!    They seem unamused, which is amusing.   

[nutty1]

You know we’ll be seeing teacup girl on BIP! 

Edited January 7, 2020 by nutty1

[tennisgurl]

Is Victoria having, like, Nam style flashbacks to riding the teacups? Most dramatic teacup ride in Bachelor history!

[Mu Shu]

I can’t believe he didn’t keep Sharon Tate doppelgänger Kylie around. What a gorgeous girl. 

Shiann, go short or go long. What you have right now isn’t really working.

[b2H]

14 minutes ago, tennisgurl said:

The more wine I drink the more this all makes sense. 

This group sure is gorgeous, like possibly even more so than usual.

And not nearly as air-headed.  There is some serious education here.  Only one social media influencer, of sorts, with the Canadian fashion blogger.