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House Hunters - General Discussion


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12 hours ago, buttersister said:

Watch alert! New episode with couple, 4 kids, who no longer want anything to do with an open concept home. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ The day I’ve been waiting for is here!

ETA: please don’t be assholes.

With four kids, it's no wonder they want rooms they can shut them in!

Haven't seen the episode yet, looking forward to it as someone who is on the record as hating open concept.

  • Love 9

The Illinois episode was interesting.Β  Β Big budget, with four kids, and she likes closed off separated rooms.Β  Β  Β  The first house was a big fixer to me.Β  Β  The wife's criticisms of the second house were bizarre.Β  Β She seemed to confuse the furniture in the rooms with the style of the house.Β  Β  Third house is over budget. and the amateur designer wife wants to change a bunch.Β  Β So they pick #1-so now the wife can change everything.Β  So they get the house for $50,000 off, for repairs, so I'm guessing they'll find a few hundred thousand more that the wife wants to do.Β  Β They've already budgeted $175k for renovations, which probably will double, and wipe out the savings from buying an estate sale property.Β Β 

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45 minutes ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

They've already budgeted $175k for renovations, which probably will double, and wipe out the savings from buying an estate sale property.Β Β 

Likely, but the husband will be okay because that'll put the cost around the mill he was willing to spend. AllegedlyπŸ˜‚Β 

I liked them after all. Even when they "disagreed" there wasn't any insulting behavior.Β 

Now bring on the episodes in whichΒ singles or couples/no kids or with a couple of kids value having separate rooms. You know, how houses were built for years. Until builders realized they could save $ and time by not bothering with all those walls and HGTV helped make it a thing.Β 

  • Love 8
31 minutes ago, buttersister said:

Now bring on the episodes in whichΒ singles or couples/no kids or with a couple of kids value having separate rooms.

My friend (married, no kids) and I (single, no kids) joke about going on HH all the time - like if either of us went on, the other would be the friend tagging along to "help." Both of us would be on the closed floor plan tip. I can't go on though, y'all would talk about me!

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3 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

The Illinois episode was interesting.Β  Β Big budget, with four kids, and she likes closed off separated rooms.Β  Β  Β  The first house was a big fixer to me.Β  Β  The wife's criticisms of the second house were bizarre.Β  Β She seemed to confuse the furniture in the rooms with the style of the house.Β  Β  Third house is over budget. and the amateur designer wife wants to change a bunch.Β  Β So they pick #1-so now the wife can change everything.Β  So they get the house for $50,000 off, for repairs, so I'm guessing they'll find a few hundred thousand more that the wife wants to do.Β  Β They've already budgeted $175k for renovations, which probably will double, and wipe out the savings from buying an estate sale property.Β Β 

Except that she will be getting exactly what she wants and is not paying for someone else's taste or quality level. Her mother seems to have been a decorator at some point and she also seems to know what she wants and how to achieve it. It was a no-brainer to me that they selected the true fixer upper especially since they now had a great budget for renovations.

Her comments regarding the second house being a hodgepodge of styles wasn't strictly based on the furniture as the architectural details including built ins were all over the place and didn't feel visually cohesive. There was a built in that was true Mission/Craftsman style and many of the rooms were standard "traditional" in terms of the trims and molding.

  • Love 4

Cleveland Ohio-needs a music room, updated kitchen (job related), he's giving me a headache with his rabid gerbil routine,Β  they each need an office.Β  He works from home.Β  She needs a home office too.Β  Β He wants modern and unique.Β  Β her budget $500k, his budget $ 550k and even higher.

The husband doesn't want a starter home, just unique.Β 

House #1-two story, big porch, $424.900,Β  lovely kitchen. 2 car detached garage, owner's suite with nice closet in front 2nd floor, nice en suite.Β  Β  He's complaining that the acoustics in the basement aren't ideal for his music (amateur).Β  He's also upset that there are similar homes on the same street, but they're all different colors, trims, and not the same.Β 

House #2-3 bed 3 bath $549.9, very unique (not in a good way), custom build, living/dining/kitchen on the second floor, husband wants the whole downstairs for his music, gym, etc., nice kitchen, 2nd floor owner's suite with a huge closet, bath is really nice, but bedroom isn't big.Β  the last bedroom is a loft with a rickety metal ladder and the window from the main bath overlooking the loft bedroom is hideous.Β Β 

House #3-Industrial/colonial look (not kidding, it's an odd mixture of styles,Β bet the husband loves it).Β  $550k, first floor is big, with a lovely kitchen/dining/living area, spectacular kitchen, there's a detached garage.Β  additional living space upstairs with another bath, husband wants the huge up stairs over the garage for his music/office/gym/ etc.Β  Β  Another guest room with bath on the floor, third floor with another bedroom and guest bath, and main bedroom with a huge closet.Β  Β 

I would pick the third house.Β  Β They pick #3.Β  the finished basement is nice.Β 

  • Love 3
(edited)

The wee-weenie, look-at-my-cool-house guy reminded me of a couple ofΒ art directorsΒ I worked with. Infuckingsufferable. They battedΒ .500 in the long-term marriage department.Β 

I was going to say they picked the right house, but it’s more like they found a red herring for each of them.πŸ˜‚

Edited by buttersister
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Cleveland. He's 40, I wonder how old she is? Did the totally modern house have any doors? I would say no to it, they couldn't fit a child and guests in there comfortably. The compromise house should be the pick. That finished space over the garage was awesome. She should let him have it for all his music stuff so it's out of the house. I don't like her snippy comments to him. He doesn't like her style but was never mean about it.

  • Love 3
(edited)

Minhnuyet, (nope not kidding about the name, thanks to another poster who found the right spelling) is newly divorced interior designer with two older sons 19, and 16, house hunting in Atlanta, GA.Β  Β Moving out of a loft, and into a better locationΒ with outdoor space for the adorable dog.Β Β 

#Β 1, townhome, new build, next to the Beltline.Β  Β 2 bed, 2 bath, end unit.Β  Great kitchen, but she calls it small, and wants to move the entire huge island over.Β  Β patio is tiny, dining is tiny.Β  Β Great main bath, smaller bedroom.Β  Β  Second bedroom is downstairs. HOA $161 to $181 a month, but no amenities, just exterior maintenance.Β 

#Β 2, Loft style, probably smaller than her current loft, but there areΒ a lot of restaurants and other stores close by.Β  Β Buckhead, loft, smallish, but nice kitchen.Β  HOA $600 a month, with gym, 24 hour concierge, pool, and dog park.Β  Β neat fireplace.Β  Owner's suite has no door between living room, great bathroom, but with a small closet, but the second bedroom is a walk in closet, but not even a decent bedroom, 2 bed 2 bath, but 2nd bath is only a half bath.Β  Β big patio/balcony,Β 

#3 not walkable, 3 bed 2 bath, 445k, single family home. on the edge of Buckhead.Β  Β  1200 sq. ft. she wants to take a smallish bedroom, and add to the owner's bathroom.Β  But there's a fantastic yard for the dog.Β  Β She wants to open the kitchen up, by taking a couple of walls out, and maybe build the back of the house out.Β Β 

She picks #2, the small loft.Β  Β She put a Murphy bed in the closet for the kids when they visit.Β  Β My guess is the sons will visit once, and maybe not even that when the show airs.Β  Β  My guess is the youngest either lives with dad, or is at boarding school.Β 

Edited by CrazyInAlabama
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7 minutes ago, chessiegal said:

What the hell is "the beltline" they were talking about in the Atlanta episode? I lived in the Atlanta area from 1992-1996, and we called the interstate surrounding the city "the perimeter". Were they talking about I85? Buckhead where she bought is near I85.

Apparently it's beltline.org and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BeltLine

  • Useful 2

Interior designer….Atlanta…..was so pretty & stylish, too. The one I wouldn’t buy was the modern townhome which every window had a view of everyone stairs and the outside had a view of her home. There was no mention of it. Even the bathroom had other units looking directly into it. Hard pass. She seemed to have a good eye for design. I would love to see how her renovations go. The Murphy bed was a good idea but that closet/bedroom was still super small. It’s like she was living in NYC. I found that very odd.Β 

  • Love 3
On 7/6/2021 at 12:15 PM, amarante said:

Β 

I did agree with her comments regarding the "dining room" configurations being removed from the kitchen. I also think this makes no sense if one is actually planning to use the dining area because unless you have a butler and footman to bring in the food and serve, everything has to be brought into the dining room and then removed. A lot of work. I live in a place where the balcony is removed from the kitchen so cooking and eating on the balcony is a bit of a hassle since you have to shlep everything there and back again.Β 

In the house that she made the commentΒ about the dining room: I think that the room being used as the dining room in that home was really the living room and the room that was going to be used as an office (she said she would want to add doors to it for privacy) was the real dining room. It had an entry from the front door foyer area and also had a smaller entry going directly into the kitchen. I think the homeowners just wanted the round room to be the dining room for some reason. I liked that house (I would have used the rooms like they were meant (in my opinion) to be used) and I especially liked that even though the back part was semi-opened with a kitchen/breakfast area/den, there were clear walls separating the kitchen/den with a large opening above the counter, instead of it just being one big room.Β 

I enjoyed this couple. I thought it was wonderful that they were enjoying their after the kids grow upΒ lives in a big house, room for guests, a gathering home, adding a pool. They seem like they can afford the home, can afford what the cost would be to have someone maintain the cleaning if they didn't want to do it, and wanted to live in a specific type of neighborhood that had larger homes. They aren't ready to downsize andΒ didn't have outlandish over the top requests.Β 

I loved his little "very good salesman" quip after saying he was a car salesman. I would probably buy a car from him.Β 

Β 

  • Love 2

Minuyette (know the spelling is wrong) in Atlanta. She has 2 kids, 19 and 16. Get that the 19 year old is off at school or work, but the 16 yr old? He has 2 more years of high school. And holidays? The boys going to share the Murphy Bed? Am guessing they stay with her ex most of the time. HOA prices sure are $$ in bigger cities.Β 

  • Love 6
13 minutes ago, jacksgirl said:

Minuyette (know the spelling is wrong) in Atlanta. She has 2 kids, 19 and 16. Get that the 19 year old is off at school or work, but the 16 yr old? He has 2 more years of high school. And holidays? The boys going to share the Murphy Bed? Am guessing they stay with her ex most of the time. HOA prices sure are $$ in bigger cities.Β 

When she said she was about to be an emptynester I rewound to be sure I heard the kids ages correctly. She sounds likes she has a count down calendar ready to boot them out. Maybe the murphy bed is her way of deterring them from staying too long when they visit!

  • LOL 9
10 hours ago, stewedsquash said:

In the house that she made the commentΒ about the dining room: I think that the room being used as the dining room in that home was really the living room and the room that was going to be used as an office (she said she would want to add doors to it for privacy) was the real dining room. It had an entry from the front door foyer area and also had a smaller entry going directly into the kitchen. I think the homeowners just wanted the round room to be the dining room for some reason. I liked that house (I would have used the rooms like they were meant (in my opinion) to be used) and I especially liked that even though the back part was semi-opened with a kitchen/breakfast area/den, there were clear walls separating the kitchen/den with a large opening above the counter, instead of it just being one big room.Β 

.Β 

Β 

Not sure about the exact configurations of specific houses but a quite common configuration is new homes is to have the "dining room" at the front of the house and the kitchen at the back of the house.

If you are using the dining room you have to bring food, table settings and etc. a distance and it all has to be carried back again. My experience with bringing food to a patio which is distant from the kitchen is that it is inconvenient since everything has to be taken there and then back again. Perhaps I am exceptionally lazy but if I wanted a functional dining room it would have to be a room that was next to the kitchen.

This is a functional reason why dining rooms are traditionally contiguous to the kitchen.Β 

  • Love 8
(edited)
14 hours ago, Texasmom1970 said:

Interior designer who wants walkable loft. Just want to be sure if any single men in the Atlanta area didn’t hear her mention it. She is single, ready to date and ready for kids to be out so she can her me time! It was like a personal ad.

Based on the fact that she chose the loft which had no reasonable place for either of her kids to spend the night; I think it was pretty obvious she is done with the parenting and wants to be sure the kids don't hinder her social life.

I cannot imagine any 16 or 19 year old who would think that sleeping in a Murphy bed in their mother's closet was a good option for them. Β The idea seemed designed to let them know they were no longer welcome to spend the night at their mother's place.Β  There was literally not one square foot of space that would be theirs alone.

I agree with the other poster, either dad has full physical custody of the 16 year old or the kid is away at boarding school.Β  And the 19 year has gotten the message to stay in the dorm or with dad over vacations and holidays.

Although, Minuette talked a lot about her semi-impoverished childhood;Β it was pretty obvious that she had had a very high standard of living as an adult and was used to the finer things.

Edited by Rootbeer
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8 hours ago, jacksgirl said:

Minuyette (know the spelling is wrong) in Atlanta. She has 2 kids, 19 and 16. Get that the 19 year old is off at school or work, but the 16 yr old? He has 2 more years of high school. And holidays? The boys going to share the Murphy Bed? Am guessing they stay with her ex most of the time. HOA prices sure are $$ in bigger cities.Β 

or...she has a blow up bed that they use in the living room. I was more surprised that she has a Border Collie. Those dogs are herder dogs...meant for farms or ranches. They need constant mental and physical activity. Smartest breed of all the dog breeds. Keeping him in a loft apartment/condo is just ridiculous. He needs to be in the country. I'm always amazed at the choices people make when they get a dog...for her lifestyle, a small, low energy dog would have been a wiser choice.

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On 7/7/2021 at 10:38 PM, Grizzly said:

Cleveland. He's 40, I wonder how old she is? Did the totally modern house have any doors? I would say no to it, they couldn't fit a child and guests in there comfortably. The compromise house should be the pick. That finished space over the garage was awesome. She should let him have it for all his music stuff so it's out of the house. I don't like her snippy comments to him. He doesn't like her style but was never mean about it.

Both of them were as annoying as hell. That modern build was a sterile weird looking house. I don't think this husband had a particular architectural bent but just wanted something that would impress their friends. She seemed a bit prickly and irritated with him...actually his voice would make me go nuts if I had to hear it all the time.

  • Love 4
10 hours ago, jacksgirl said:

Minuyette (know the spelling is wrong) in Atlanta. She has 2 kids, 19 and 16. Get that the 19 year old is off at school or work, but the 16 yr old? He has 2 more years of high school. And holidays? The boys going to share the Murphy Bed? Am guessing they stay with her ex most of the time. HOA prices sure are $$ in bigger cities.Β 

They might stay most of the time with their Dad. Or the youngest might be in boarding school.Β 

3 hours ago, amarante said:

Perhaps I am exceptionally lazy but if I wanted a functional dining room it would have to be a room that was next to the kitchen.

Yep, just lazy. ;) But truly, why is 5-10 extra steps so much?Β 

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Just now, Grrarrggh said:

They might stay most of the time with their Dad. Or the youngest might be in boarding school.Β 

She mentioned that none of her children live with her full time so either he is at boarding school or living with the father full time. Not to be sexist but once kids reach a certain age they can choose where they want to live and teenage boys often opt to live with the father.Β 

The loft she was moving from didn't seem to be particularly child friendly either - not that there is anything wrong with that.Β 

  • Love 2
(edited)
21 minutes ago, amarante said:

She mentioned that none of her children live with her full time so either he is at boarding school or living with the father full time. Not to be sexist but once kids reach a certain age they can choose where they want to live and teenage boys often opt to live with the father.Β 

The loft she was moving from didn't seem to be particularly child friendly either - not that there is anything wrong with that.Β 

I got the impression that the divorce happened just a few years ago and her kids were pretty well grown by the time she had her own apartment.Β  For all we know, she had lived in a house with her husband and he kept the house and the kids lived most of the time with him.Β  I would imagine that kids in middle school and up wouldn't want to change schools and, if Dad was staying put, it would make more sense for them to be with him through high school anyway.

They shouldn't have bothered telling us about the kids in the first place.Β  It was pretty obvious that she wasn't worried about having room for them in the new loft.Β  Which is fine;Β they've got 2 parents and are nearly grown anyway.Β  The Murphy bed thing was weird.Β  I'm trying to picture a 16 year old boy sleeping in his mother's closet alongside her shoes and dresses.

Edited by Rootbeer
  • Love 10
1 hour ago, Grrarrggh said:

Β But truly, why is 5-10 extra steps so much?Β 

It is generally more than ten steps to the front of the houses I have seen and those steps add up if you are setting a table. Bringing in the food and condiments and then clearing the table.Β 
Β 

Why don’t you keep track of everything you bring to a table when serving dinner and then carry all his items to the far point of your house and carry them back again.Β 
Β 

I doubt whether dining rooms that are distant from kitchens are actually used as dining rooms on any kind of regular basis.Β 

4 hours ago, amarante said:

Not sure about the exact configurations of specific houses but a quite common configuration is new homes is to have the "dining room" at the front of the house and the kitchen at the back of the house.

If you are using the dining room you have to bring food, table settings and etc. a distance and it all has to be carried back again. My experience with bringing food to a patio which is distant from the kitchen is that it is inconvenient since everything has to be taken there and then back again. Perhaps I am exceptionally lazy but if I wanted a functional dining room it would have to be a room that was next to the kitchen.

This is a functional reason why dining rooms are traditionally contiguous to the kitchen.Β 

Yeah, that's what I meant about the first house. I was surprised that the agent didn't point out that the office area was really the dining room. It was attached to the kitchen with an opening and also there was an opening to the foyer.Β 

  • Love 3
3 hours ago, amarante said:

She mentioned that none of her children live with her full time so either he is at boarding school or living with the father full time. Not to be sexist but once kids reach a certain age they can choose where they want to live and teenage boys often opt to live with the father.Β 

The loft she was moving from didn't seem to be particularly child friendly either - not that there is anything wrong with that.Β 

She was very clear that this was HER place and her primary focusΒ at this point isΒ her social life. This is her divorcΓ©eΒ pad. IΒ assume her sonsΒ live with their father - she didn’t mention staying in a school district for the younger one (although hunters rarely mention school districts). She also must not plan to have guests; I wouldn’t stay with her if the guest room was a closet.

I’veΒ known other empty nesters who downsize and move into condosΒ the heart of theirΒ cities, and their new places are not chosen with the grown kids (or grandkids, if applicable) in mind.

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4 hours ago, BrownBear2012 said:

He needs to be in the country. I'm always amazed at the choices people make when they get a dog...for her lifestyle, a small, low energy dog would have been a wiser choice.

It jumped on both her friend and on the guy who was showing her the redesign of the kitchen when he just stuck his arm out to illustrate how the end of the counter would swing out.Β  Not acceptable.

Β 

13 hours ago, jacksgirl said:

Minuyette (know the spelling is wrong) in Atlanta.

It's Minhnuyet.Β  She said she had some connection to Vietnam, which made at least the "minh" part make some sense.Β  And upon close examination, I think she looks like he has some Vietnamese blood in her.

I was double-checking the spelling, and found out she has a profile on HGTV.

https://www.hgtv.com/profiles/professionals/minhnuyet-hardy

Not sure what that means.Β  Do people pay for inclusion on there?Β  There are a lot of professionals listed.

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41 minutes ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

It jumped on both her friend and on the guy who was showing her the redesign of the kitchen when he just stuck his arm out to illustrate how the end of the counter would swing out.Β  Not acceptable.

Β 

It's Minhnuyet.Β  She said she had some connection to Vietnam, which made at least the "minh" part make some sense.Β  And upon close examination, I think she looks like he has some Vietnamese blood in her.

I was double-checking the spelling, and found out she has a profile on HGTV.

https://www.hgtv.com/profiles/professionals/minhnuyet-hardy

Not sure what that means.Β  Do people pay for inclusion on there?Β  There are a lot of professionals listed.

She said she was born in Vietnam and the family left when she was two. Her father had been in the Army. She would have left when the US conceded the war and left. There are pictures of the fall of Saigon since it was assumed that anyone who had collaborated with the US would be killed or imprisoned.Β 

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1 hour ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

It's Minhnuyet.Β  She said she had some connection to Vietnam, which made at least the "minh" part make some sense.Β  And upon close examination, I think she looks like he has some Vietnamese blood in her.

Β 

She was born in Vietnam, came to the States as a toddler. Her father was stationed there and I assume that's how he met her mother, who I assume was Vietnamese. She looked half Vietnamese to me.

  • Love 4
9 hours ago, BrownBear2012 said:

or...she has a blow up bed that they use in the living room. I was more surprised that she has a Border Collie. Those dogs are herder dogs...meant for farms or ranches. They need constant mental and physical activity. Smartest breed of all the dog breeds. Keeping him in a loft apartment/condo is just ridiculous. He needs to be in the country. I'm always amazed at the choices people make when they get a dog...for her lifestyle, a small, low energy dog would have been a wiser choice.

Spot on about the Border Collie. I thought the same thing when I saw him. Did you notice how he kept jumping up on the contractor at the end? Poor Ollie wanted someone to play with him! Even if she didn’t want a small dog, their are larger breeds that are lower energy.Β 
I think the 16 yo must live with his dad. The Murphy bed in the closet was ridiculous. She didn’t mention installing a shower in the half bath like the realtor suggested.Β 
$600/month HOA? 😳

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5 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

It jumped on both her friend and on the guy who was showing her the redesign of the kitchen when he just stuck his arm out to illustrate how the end of the counter would swing out.Β  Not acceptable.

Β 

It's Minhnuyet.Β  She said she had some connection to Vietnam, which made at least the "minh" part make some sense.Β  And upon close examination, I think she looks like he has some Vietnamese blood in her.

I was double-checking the spelling, and found out she has a profile on HGTV.

https://www.hgtv.com/profiles/professionals/minhnuyet-hardy

Not sure what that means.Β  Do people pay for inclusion on there?Β  There are a lot of professionals listed.

Her dog needs to be trained. They are very smart dogs and can be trained easily.Β 

She said her father was in the military and her mother was from Vietnam. She was very pretty...

4 hours ago, Empress1 said:

She was born in Vietnam, came to the States as a toddler. Her father was stationed there and I assume that's how he met her mother, who I assume was Vietnamese. She looked half Vietnamese to me.

Yes...the American/Vietnamese mix was evident...very attractive lady.

  • Love 2
7 minutes ago, LittleIggy said:

$600/month HOA? 😳

I do wonder if the condo collapse in Surfside is going to make people look more carefully at HOA fees, to see if they're building a healthy reserve.Β  I'm also wondering if there's going to be an increase in the number of people who want to look at minutes of past association meetings to try to determine if there's a $100,000 per unit assessment looming.

I didn't notice--did Minhnuyet do something about not having a door to her bedroom?Β  They kind of glossed over that, and I would think it would be kind of a big deal, the way people are always going on about privacy.

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1 hour ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

I didn't notice--did Minhnuyet do something about not having a door to her bedroom?Β  They kind of glossed over that, and I would think it would be kind of a big deal, the way people are always going on about privacy.

Not unless she was going to add it after she redid the kitchen.Β 

  • Love 2
(edited)
On 7/9/2021 at 9:35 PM, LittleIggy said:


$600/month HOA? 😳

That would be a fairly low fee for a building like hers. As I recall it had a pool, the dog park and a 24 hour concierge. Utilities like water and possibly electricity would also be included and of course all of those utilities for the common areas would be paid from the monthly assessments. Common area utilities are surprisingly expensive and keep going up. There are also significant common area equipment that needs to be maintained like the elevators and the plumbing systems.

You would also have a good number of staff who would be cleaning the common areas; maintaining the facilities (e.g. like the super in an apartment building) and maintaining the grounds.Β 

I live in a condo and that would be typical for that type of building. The only thing the building didn't have was valet parking which would have added about $400 per month.

Β 

ETA - To give a sense of how much if costs to run this kind of condo, there are 8736 hours in a a year which means that just for the 24/7 concierge the cost would be about $175,000 - I used a $20 an hour cost which would cover actual wages plus FICA, Workman's Comp, vacation and sick leave and other benefits. My building provides some form of health insurance to our employees plus paid time off. Most of New York City has unionized doormen so hourly costs would be higher.Β 

Assuming there are 100 units in the building the cost PER MONTH for each unit is about $145 just for the concierge. I live in a building with a 24/7 concierge and whatever it costs is worth it to me. There is complete security as no one is buzzing in just anyone and no one is sneaking in behind someone who is going into the building. And the convenience of having someone signing for packages and letting people into my unit if I am not home like my cleaning lady.Β 

A building like this generally also has an on-site manager of some kind as well who makes a decent salary.Β 

Β 

Edited by amarante
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Minhuyet in Atlanta: If I were a teenage boy and my mom moved into a place like that, I would get the message loud and clear that she doesn't want me to stay overnight. The sons are 16 and 19. College dorms aren't open year-around, and neither are boarding schools (if that's the 16-year-old's situation). The boys have to go home during the summer, as well as winter and spring breaks.Β I hope they have their own space at their father's house and feel welcome there.

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(edited)
On 7/10/2021 at 6:45 PM, chocolatine said:

Minhuyet in Atlanta: If I were a teenage boy and my mom moved into a place like that, I would get the message loud and clear that she doesn't want me to stay overnight. The sons are 16 and 19. College dorms aren't open year-around, and neither are boarding schools (if that's the 16-year-old's situation). The boys have to go home during the summer, as well as winter and spring breaks.Β I hope they have their own space at their father's house and feel welcome there.

One of the House Hunters tropes is the empty nest. What if you buyΒ a new and smallerΒ nest and then theΒ kids boomerang? Β  With the shocking cost of housing in some areas, and then the pandemic,Β I think it has becomeΒ pretty common.

My daughter lived with me for four years after college. Two years working and saving for grad school. Two years attending gradΒ school. Β Now she is a homeowner, has a good job and a family - Β she is the breadwinner.
I would say that was a good investment.

Edited by kirklandia
Clarification
  • Love 8
10 hours ago, kirklandia said:

And of course some kids boomerang. Β 
My daughter lived with me for four years after college. Two years working and saving for grad school. Two years attending gradΒ school. Β Now she is a homeowner, has a good job and a family -she is the breadwinner.
I would say that was a good investment.

Why can't the kids boomerang at their dad's house? Just because mothers are female doesn't mean they must be the parent children live with.

  • Love 8
14 minutes ago, Grrarrggh said:

Why can't the kids boomerang at their dad's house? Just because mothers are female doesn't mean they must be the parent children live with.

Agree, the kids may be more comfortable at their father's. My problem is that there is virtually nowhere both boys could stay at their mom's new place for even a single night.Β 

  • Love 9
11 minutes ago, jacksgirl said:

Agree, the kids may be more comfortable at their father's. My problem is that there is virtually nowhere both boys could stay at their mom's new place for even a single night.Β 

There is a bed and a couch in the living room. When my parents sold the family home, I often slept on the sofa if there was more than one guest. And althiugh they had a convertible sofa in the den, it really wasn’t much more comfortable than a Murphy bed. It wasn’t a real guest room as it was just a mattress to crash on. I never thought my parents were rejecting me by not having a spare room dedicated to me.

And since the boys were probablyΒ living with the father, it really was a non issue.Β 

  • Love 4
On 7/10/2021 at 6:51 AM, Cetacean said:

Wouldn't make much difference if she lives alone.Β  MIne is never shut.

Same for me, but I was basing my comment because I keep hearing people going on and on about various privacy issues (none of which would bother me).Β  Like when they balk over having only one bathroom, and it's attached to the bedroom, so people have to go through the bedroom to get to it.Β  I've had that arrangement before and it never bothered me, but I hear it mentioned by plenty of HHs.Β 

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