S01.E22: M-A-- MAY-JAY

[Drogo]

JJ's summer plans may not coincide with Maya's when it looks like he might spend it with Kenneth. Meanwhile, Jimmy gets special treatment at an unlikely place; and Dylan's identity in the family is threatened.

[balmz]

episode was ok, maya really got on my nerves this episode, she needs to step back and realize that jj is not an infant or part of her but a separate being, i blame her for jj getting hurt and requiring surgery, also her behavior towards kenneth was really rude, i hope they tone her down more otherwise you end up with an annoyingg sueish character

jimmy's plot was amusing was expecting the airport job to be used not the hospital

 

ray and dylan plot was ok but isn't dylan more of an all around sports and athletic person not just running?

[GRChereck]

First of all, can I just say I adored the music cues in this one? :D (The New Pornographers' "Dancehall Domine" (2014) during the cold-open time-lapse montage, the restaurant band performing the Ramones' "Blitzkrieg Bop" at Jimmy's request, and the Crystals' "Then He Kissed Me" during the JJ/Jimmy-entering-the-hospital tracking shot -- I take it the latter was meant as a Goodfellas homage...)

Interesting to finally see how the family deals with JJ's frequent surgeries -- previously alluded to in "Sled Hockey" and "Road Trip" -- when this is the first time Kenneth has seen them in this situation...

The Maya/JJ/Kenneth plot struck me as a direct continuation of "Cheater" / "Runaway," with JJ exploring and pushing the limits of his independence, Maya still struggling to let him go, and Kenneth still figuring out how best to help him. While I wouldn't say it packed as much of a dramatic punch as either of those prior episodes, I think it had its moments.

Funny how Jimmy had apparently never thought of the hospital perks he gets as "special treatment" or "having pull" until he made a well-to-do new friend (Paul F. Tompkins, who voiced Puppet Doug in a series of Ford Focus ads with John in 2012) who revels in a life of privilege; but then I guess it makes sense to me if the perks had probably built up so gradually over the past 16 years, Jimmy wouldn't have really noticed until it was somehow pointed out to him. I gotta say, JRB and PFT were fun in their brief scenes together; the payoff in the closing tag was especially cute! 

The Ray/Dylan plot here reminded me a bit of the s.5 'Simpsons' episode "Lisa on Ice" : Ray taking a modern-dance class to up his Gym grade recalled Lisa having to join a peewee-league sport because she was failing Gym, and Dylan winning the race to JJ's hospital room only to let Ray go in first as he usually does (she'd gotten what she'd wanted anyway, which was to win a race with Ray after having been so disconcerted at losing to him once before) makes me think of Bart and Lisa ending up in direct competition with each other at hockey only for them to set aside their rivalry at the last minute and let their game end in a tie. So sweet. :)

Edited May 11, 2017 by GRChereck

[paulvdb]

3 hours ago, GRChereck said:

the Crystals' "Then He Kissed Me" during the JJ/Jimmy-entering-the-hospital tracking shot -- I take it the latter was meant as a Goodfellas homage...)

Never watched Goodfellas. I know the song from Adventures in Babysitting (the original from 1987 with Elisabeth Shue, not the Disney Channel version).

[bros402]

Good episode. I like how it continued with the theme of JJ's furthering attempts of independence.

 

Can't believe next week is the season finale.

Or that Speechless hasn't been officially renewed yet.

[Crs97]

If we had an aide and he first put words in my kid's mouth about me and then countermanded my decision in front of my kid with his hand on my shoulder while he told me how things would be?  Maya wasn't rude enough to Kenneth.  Frankly, I hated the whole "use her vanity against her" plan.  We have seen her time and again make hard decisions that recognize his need for independence.  Badly done.

Maya was  a little OTT at the beginning, but I liked how calm she became once he was hurt.  It reminded me of Raycation.  I thought a ten-week camp was overkill.  Start with one or two weeks.  

Jimmy at the hospital made me LOL many, many times.

[Skyfall]

8 hours ago, bros402 said:

Good episode. I like how it continued with the theme of JJ's furthering attempts of independence.

 

Can't believe next week is the season finale.

Or that Speechless hasn't been officially renewed yet.

ABC rarely does mass early renewals. Most renewals and cancellations will be known by end of tomorrow for ABC (well everyone, but the other networks have already handed bulk renewals)

[GRChereck]

8 hours ago, paulvdb said:

Never watched Goodfellas. I know the song from Adventures in Babysitting (the original from 1987 with Elisabeth Shue, not the Disney Channel version).

I'm actually more familiar with the song through AiB -- and it had been a while since I'd seen GF -- but I looked it up on YouTube right after the show and was reminded that GF had used it too (plus, I knew the use of tracking-shot was unusual for this show, so I figured they had to be spoofing / parodying something).

Quote

If we had an aide and he first put words in my kid's mouth about me and then countermanded my decision in front of my kid with his hand on my shoulder while he told me how things would be?  Maya wasn't rude enough to Kenneth...

Maya was  a little OTT at the beginning, but I liked how calm she became once he was hurt.  It reminded me of Raycation.

Agreed. :) In a way, Maya's attitude here reminded me a bit of Jimmy's in "Sled Hockey" -- just like Jimmy had been so freaked-out at the prospect of JJ playing what he considered an especially violent sport he totally forgot the family's pro-inclusion / JJ-can-do-anything policy, only to be the one to encourage JJ to start playing again after the kid considered quitting over a broken tooth, Maya seemed to have a similar turn-around about encouraging JJ's independence by letting him go to that camp with Kenneth for the summer (after having been understandably upset earlier at the pair's tactics to get her to let them go).

Edited May 11, 2017 by GRChereck

[tennisgurl]

Jimmy being the King of the Hospital was so awesome! He really does have juice! I love Paul F. Tompkins, so I was super happy to see him here, and I was so happy that he was impressed by Jimmy's pull at the hospital. I hope he shows up again, Jimmy could use more friends.

Damn, a 10 week camp? My mom would have lost her mind over that too, and my worst ailment as ADHD! Just start for one week JJ and work from there!

I cant believe there's only one more episode this season! What will I do in the off season?!?!

[71dude]

"At whom are you looking?"

"I hate being smart"

“Ray, I’ve done a pretty good job so far of staying out of your shame radius, but the splash zone on this one is just too big.”

This one was a comedown from the last three shows but there was still much to enjoy - especially the hilarious opening sequence with the house of cards/Brady Bunch shoutout, the brilliant hospital scene and the Ray/Dylan chase with Ray (naturally) getting tangled in the wires. Ray's getting too big for Dylan to push around so the writers will have to think of other ways for her to torment him. She could use her own room too - they should address that next season.

I think I'm a new fan of "Dancehall Domine".

[incandescent]

My favourite part of the episode may have been Ray using what he picked up from modern dance to shimmy out of the tangled wires.

[ItCouldBeWorse]

9 hours ago, Crs97 said:

Maya was  a little OTT at the beginning, but I liked how calm she became once he was hurt.  It reminded me of Raycation.  I thought a ten-week camp was overkill.  Start with one or two weeks.  

Exactly.  Also, is this camp free?  I would have thought that the question of price would have arisen.

It's a good thing that Kevin Kenneth has another job if he's not being paid to help JJ in the summer.  It does seem like the day that JJ didn't get dressed must have been a weekend day, and yet Kevin Kenneth was there, juggling.  Does he help out 7 days a week?  He does have the big box store job.  (Also the time-lapse montage did not appear to involve JJ going to the bathroom at all, since he never left the table)

Also, wouldn't JJ prefer having Kevin Kenneth take care of some of his personal needs as oppose to his mother?  He is a teen age boy. 

Finally, I get the point of Jimmy's "juice" at the hospital, but in my opinion, all the staff would have been calling out greetings to JJ, not ignoring him in favor of Jimmy.  That's just how hospital staff are.

Edited May 11, 2017 by ItCouldBeWorse

[PradaKitty]

Kevin?!

[GRChereck]

On 5/11/2017 at 1:10 PM, ItCouldBeWorse said:

Also, is this camp free?  I would have thought that the question of price would have arisen.

Hopefully, that'll come up in the next episode (1x23, "C-A-Camp")... :\ (I'm guessing it'll be a fictional camp, but if it's based on Camp Wamp or something like that, it probably takes grants / private and corporate donations so families can send their kids without having to worry about paying so much, if at all...) 

On 5/11/2017 at 1:10 PM, ItCouldBeWorse said:

It's a good thing that Kevin Kenneth has another job if he's not being paid to help JJ in the summer.  It does seem like the day that JJ didn't get dressed must have been a weekend day, and yet Kevin was there, juggling.  Does he help out 7 days a week?  He does have the big box store job.  (Also the time-lapse montage did not appear to involve JJ going to the bathroom at all, since he never left the table)

I did notice the (lack of) bathroom thing, which struck me as pretty odd... Also, I don't think Kenneth came over until later in the afternoon (not long before Jimmy came home from work) so he might have only had to work in the morning / early afternoon.

Edited May 14, 2017 by GRChereck
typo

[neuromom]

 I found all the physical attraction between different members of the family very sweet.  Jimmy kissing JJ, Ray kissing Dylan and then Ray snuggling with JJ.

 I was a little nervous in the scene where JJ fell out of his chair. He was so I owned up, I almost thought they were going to show him have a seizure. In any case my first thought was "he's really wound up, he's going to fall out!" And he did.

 Of course it may be just because I'm in tune to that today. My son, who has never had a seizure at school, actually had one today.   And he has enough body awareness to have been aware of his "aura  "  and apparently try to lean up against the teacher in order to "ask for help " (hes not  understandable generally, and is totally quiet when there's a seizure brewing)   The teacher thought he was just being silly ( because he does that too! )  and she was pushing him away, when he suddenly collapsed on his side .  Thankfully, no injuries that require surgery. And his chiropractor  got him adjusted . 

 Although I found the scene in the hospital with Jimmy and the staff very amusing, it was also unrealistic  !  In fact, I almost thought we were going to see that it was something that Jaime cooked up in his mind  .

[Crs97]

1 hour ago, neuromom said:

Although I found the scene in the hospital with Jimmy and the staff very amusing, it was also unrealistic  ! 

To the extent they had on the show, it was absolutely unrealistic, but IRL we have some juice at certain doctors' offices and hospital departments.  One nurse comes to the lobby to wait for our oldest when she sees he has an appointment because she knows he loves taking the staff-only elevators.  The therapist takes him into staff-only areas for the "special" vending machines, and we had been going for years before I noticed I had been walking right past a sign that told me only patients were allowed into the treatment area.  When I asked about it, they told me to ignore it.  I am sure everyone who has a child who spends a lot of time at hospitals has a story of feeling a little like a VIP.

Hope your son is okay, neuromom!

I hadn't noticed that Ray was using his modern dance moves to detangle.  Nice catch, incandescent!

[MaryHedwig]

Quote

Maya seemed to have a similar turn-around about encouraging JJ's independence by letting him go to that camp with Kenneth for the summer

Was it established that Kenneth was accompanying JJ to camp? I missed that.

Quote

Although I found the scene in the hospital with Jimmy and the staff very amusing, it was also unrealistic  ! 

Of course,  but my favorite line was, Jimmy: "It's a boy," as Jimmy is guided through a shortcut via a delivery room.

Edited May 13, 2017 by MaryHedwig

[GRChereck]

31 minutes ago, MaryHedwig said:

Was it established that Kenneth was accompanying JJ to camp. I missed that.

Now that I've thought about it some more, I don't think they said anything outright about Kenneth going along with him, but I had assumed JJ would still need his aide to help him with a few things like his personal needs -- unless the camp has volunteer aides there who can do that stuff. :\ I'm guessing the next episode will be more clear on that...

[bros402]

6 hours ago, neuromom said:

 I found all the physical attraction between different members of the family very sweet.  Jimmy kissing JJ, Ray kissing Dylan and then Ray snuggling with JJ.

 I was a little nervous in the scene where JJ fell out of his chair. He was so I owned up, I almost thought they were going to show him have a seizure. In any case my first thought was "he's really wound up, he's going to fall out!" And he did.

 Of course it may be just because I'm in tune to that today. My son, who has never had a seizure at school, actually had one today.   And he has enough body awareness to have been aware of his "aura  "  and apparently try to lean up against the teacher in order to "ask for help " (hes not  understandable generally, and is totally quiet when there's a seizure brewing)   The teacher thought he was just being silly ( because he does that too! )  and she was pushing him away, when he suddenly collapsed on his side .  Thankfully, no injuries that require surgery. And his chiropractor  got him adjusted . 

 Although I found the scene in the hospital with Jimmy and the staff very amusing, it was also unrealistic  !  In fact, I almost thought we were going to see that it was something that Jaime cooked up in his mind  .

I don't think they have shown JJ to have seizures. Hopefully he (and Micah!) don't have seizures.

Seizures at school suck. I had one my junior year of high school. My classmates and the teacher were all shocked. The nurse told me that I didn't have epilepsy and it was just syncope. My neurologist yelled at the principal to yell at the nurse on his behalf (He does a *lot* of work for the district).

The hospital scene It was unrealistic, but it was an homage to Goodfellas, I believe.

4 hours ago, Crs97 said:

To the extent they had on the show, it was absolutely unrealistic, but IRL we have some juice at certain doctors' offices and hospital departments.  One nurse comes to the lobby to wait for our oldest when she sees he has an appointment because she knows he loves taking the staff-only elevators.  The therapist takes him into staff-only areas for the "special" vending machines, and we had been going for years before I noticed I had been walking right past a sign that told me only patients were allowed into the treatment area.  When I asked about it, they told me to ignore it.  I am sure everyone who has a child who spends a lot of time at hospitals has a story of feeling a little like a VIP.

Hope your son is okay, neuromom!

I hadn't noticed that Ray was using his modern dance moves to detangle.  Nice catch, incandescent!

I have juice at my local oncologist. Everyone there knows me. The office staff, the doctors, the phlebotomist, the nurses - they'll see me and be like "Oh hey, [bros], how are you doing? Didn't know you had an appointment today!" Last time, I went early, at 2 PM (I normally have an appointment at 4:30-5:00) and everyone I saw was like "Hi [bros]! Oh wow, the day has gone faster than I thought!" Then I had to tell them I was there for an early appointment :P

If I call the office for any reason, they usually get one of the doctors or the NP on the phone, not just one of the regular nurses.

I'm not known at my preferred hospital by name.... but by symptom. Last time I was in the ER there, they said "Hey, are you the guy who had the purple feet?"

[Gulftastic]

I can't believe that many posters seem not to have seen Goodfellas! Rectify that now. 

Good episode. I loved the speeded up montage, especially Ray and Dylan with the house of cards and Kenneth's juggling.

[dmmetler]

The Girl Scout council here has a one week special needs camp that utilizes a lot of volunteers (senior Girl Scouts, college students, high school kids who need service hours, state scholarship recipients). They also hire paid staff who are experienced working with disabilities. 

 

My head canon is that Kenneth found the camp, signed up as either a volunteer or as paid staff, and then suggested it to J.J. 

Edited May 12, 2017 by dmmetler

[ItCouldBeWorse]

14 hours ago, GRChereck said:

14 hours ago, MaryHedwig said:

Was it established that Kenneth was accompanying JJ to camp. I missed that.

Now that I've thought about it some more, I don't think they said anything outright about Kenneth going along with him, but I had assumed JJ would still need his aide to help him with a few things like his personal needs -- unless the camp has volunteer aides there who can do that stuff. :\ I'm guessing the next episode will be more clear on that...

Then someone would have to pay Kenneth for the summer.  I assume that the camp has a very good staff to camper ratio, and that the staff would be expected to help the campers dress, shower and eat, if necessary.  I just don't know who is going to stand by JJ to vocalize for him all the time.  Maybe other campers in his bunk will get involved.

Edited May 12, 2017 by ItCouldBeWorse

[GRChereck]

On 5/12/2017 at 8:41 AM, dmmetler said:

My head canon is that Kenneth found the camp, signed up as either a volunteer or as paid staff, and then suggested it to J.J.

OK, that makes sense to me, too. :) 

[SnarkySheep]

IMO it was a bit insulting that Maya was SO over-the-top doting on JJ. Yes, I get that he's her special son; but when she was looking at that scrapbook, and then when JJ announced his camp plans, she's all, "But what will I DO this summer without him?!" I just wanted to shout, "Lady, you've got two other kids!! Did you forget?"

[GRChereck]

2 hours ago, SnarkySheep said:

IMO it was a bit insulting that Maya was SO over-the-top doting on JJ. Yes, I get that he's her special son; but when she was looking at that scrapbook, and then when JJ announced his camp plans, she's all, "But what will I DO this summer without him?!" I just wanted to shout, "Lady, you've got two other kids!! Did you forget?"

Yeah, when she said, "Am I supposed to just spend it with someone else? May-Ray? That just sounds so stupid," I thought that was kinda mean. :\

[bros402]

6 hours ago, SnarkySheep said:

IMO it was a bit insulting that Maya was SO over-the-top doting on JJ. Yes, I get that he's her special son; but when she was looking at that scrapbook, and then when JJ announced his camp plans, she's all, "But what will I DO this summer without him?!" I just wanted to shout, "Lady, you've got two other kids!! Did you forget?"

I don't know - just see how she coddles JJ and wants to spend all the time she can with him. She might've had stuff planned for them to do - Maybe Jimmy & Ray/Dylan do stuff in the summer - or maybe Dylan does a summer sport, or track & field stuff. Ray seems more solitary, he'd probably use the lack of a school night to use a telescope to view the stars.

4 hours ago, GRChereck said:

Yeah, when she said, "Am I supposed to just spend it with someone else? May-Ray? That just sounds so stupid," I thought that was kinda mean. :\

I don't think it was mean - it seemed more than the possibility of JJ being at a 10 week camp blindsided Maya .

[pajamamama]

Hmm...the notion that Kenneth is working at the camp and gave JJ the info about the camp would mean that they were in cahoots about this. That was never shown or even implied. It looked like the camp idea genuinely came from JJ. And this is one of the many things I love about Kenneth's character, yes he is an aide but he's also JJ's advocate. He more than just communicates for JJ, he sticks up for him. Even against Maya. I hope we see more of this in the last episode.

[GRChereck]

8 hours ago, bros402 said:

I don't think it was mean - it seemed more than the possibility of JJ being at a 10 week camp blindsided Maya .

Ah. My thought was after they'd had such a sweet bond in "The Club," I was a little disappointed that she would be so dismissive of having to settle for Ray if she couldn't have JJ all to herself for the summer... 

But then again, Ray wasn't exactly the nicest to her in that episode (she really had wanted to use their country-club time to bond over their shared interests, and he was aware of that but disregarded her feelings to do just what he wanted), and you have a good point that she may be less keen on trying to bond with him as much as she does with JJ because Ray does tend to be a more solitary character (plus, perhaps outside of the country-club stuff and "afternoon tea," they don't really have much in the way of leisure activities they'd want to do together).

9 hours ago, bros402 said:

Maybe Jimmy & Ray/Dylan do stuff in the summer - or maybe Dylan does a summer sport, or track & field stuff.

Another good point. :) While she does have her moments where she especially feels like she needs her mom (such as on her birthday in "Surprise," and at her track meet in "Choir"), Dylan has mostly been content to either do her own thing or bond with her dad.*

8 hours ago, pajamamama said:

Hmm...the notion that Kenneth is working at the camp and gave JJ the info about the camp would mean that they were in cahoots about this. That was never shown or even implied. It looked like the camp idea genuinely came from JJ. And this is one of the many things I love about Kenneth's character, yes he is an aide but he's also JJ's advocate. He more than just communicates for JJ, he sticks up for him. Even against Maya. I hope we see more of this in the last episode.

I hope so, too. (Also, I guess it does make more sense about JJ being to the one to find out about the camp and then convince Kenneth to help him convince Maya to let him go -- he would definitely make sure he had his mom's permission to go first, and then maybe ask Kenneth if he wants to sign up for a job at the camp so they can still see each other and spend time together over those 10 weeks.)

 

(* - Speaking of which, judging from a couple recent interview comments -- JRB has said something about Jimmy and Dylan getting into some "trouble" in different places around the country, while show creator Scott Silveri has suggested that the end of the season won't be a "cliffhanger" but it'll raise a question of "what are they going to do with that next season?", I have a bad feeling their antics in this week's ep might result in costing Jimmy his job or even getting him in serious legal trouble... :\ )

[vibeology]

On ‎5‎/‎12‎/‎2017 at 9:41 AM, dmmetler said:

My head canon is that Kenneth found the camp, signed up as either a volunteer or as paid staff, and then suggested it to J.J. 

And I thought that the whole point was this was a part of the plan JJ and Kenneth hatched for JJ to be more independent. Why worry about undoing the button if Kenneth would be at camp to do that for him? I figured it was a camp where there would be aides and assistance but the ratio wouldn't be 1:1 and at times all the teens would have to be somewhat independent. I guess we'll learn more this week.

[neuromom]

1 hour ago, vibeology said:

And I thought that the whole point was this was a part of the plan JJ and Kenneth hatched for JJ to be more independent. Why worry about undoing the button if Kenneth would be at camp to do that for him? I figured it was a camp where there would be aides and assistance but the ratio wouldn't be 1:1 and at times all the teens would have to be somewhat independent. I guess we'll learn more this week.

 I guess I will have to rewatch because I missed the part where It specified  that the camp was for special needs or disable people. Is that the kind of camp it is? 

 And if those camps exist, dang, I'd really like to find one for my kid  , :-)

[bros402]

22 hours ago, pajamamama said:

Hmm...the notion that Kenneth is working at the camp and gave JJ the info about the camp would mean that they were in cahoots about this. That was never shown or even implied. It looked like the camp idea genuinely came from JJ. And this is one of the many things I love about Kenneth's character, yes he is an aide but he's also JJ's advocate. He more than just communicates for JJ, he sticks up for him. Even against Maya. I hope we see more of this in the last episode.

It didn't seem like Kenneth was doing anything with the camp. My head canon about the way I think it went down was maybe JJ and Kenneth were talking about independence - maybe Kenneth was like "What about a camp, or something?" - then Kenneth helped research it for JJ.

Or since they use a program to help subsidize Kenneth (The one that provided the aide in the pilot) - maybe Kenneth has to go there every once in a while to pick up a paycheck, or get training, or something like that and he saw the brochure for the camp, grabbed it, and showed it to JJ.

11 hours ago, neuromom said:

 I guess I will have to rewatch because I missed the part where It specified  that the camp was for special needs or disable people. Is that the kind of camp it is? 

 And if those camps exist, dang, I'd really like to find one for my kid  , :-)

Yeah - the brochure said it was a special needs camp. They exist. Here's one in California - https://www.abilityfirst.org/programs/programs_camppaivika.aspx

These two websites seem to list camps, but I would google to learn about whatever you see on these - directory sites tend to not be frequently updated, or just put random things up - http://www.veryspecialcamps.com/ & http://specialcampsforspecialkids.com/ - so check reviews, facebook, etc. of other camps - there's a good amount of them here in the Northeast, some of the kids I was in self contained classes K-2 with went to them and they liked them a lot - two of the kids I took Adaptive PE with in HS went to some camp in upstate NY and they *loved* it.

[neuromom]

On 5/15/2017 at 11:47 PM, bros402 said:

It didn't seem like Kenneth was doing anything with the camp. My head canon about the way I think it went down was maybe JJ and Kenneth were talking about independence - maybe Kenneth was like "What about a camp, or something?" - then Kenneth helped research it for JJ.

Or since they use a program to help subsidize Kenneth (The one that provided the aide in the pilot) - maybe Kenneth has to go there every once in a while to pick up a paycheck, or get training, or something like that and he saw the brochure for the camp, grabbed it, and showed it to JJ.

Yeah - the brochure said it was a special needs camp. They exist. Here's one in California - https://www.abilityfirst.org/programs/programs_camppaivika.aspx

These two websites seem to list camps, but I would google to learn about whatever you see on these - directory sites tend to not be frequently updated, or just put random things up - http://www.veryspecialcamps.com/ & http://specialcampsforspecialkids.com/ - so check reviews, facebook, etc. of other camps - there's a good amount of them here in the Northeast, some of the kids I was in self contained classes K-2 with went to them and they liked them a lot - two of the kids I took Adaptive PE with in HS went to some camp in upstate NY and they *loved* it.

Thank you so much Bros402! 

[Big Mother]

I found the whole storyline of JJ's camp a bit confusing and unrealistic.

If the camp is geared for children with physical llimitations, he doesn't have to be able to close a button. They have staff for that.

If it's geared for able-bodied kids only, it's not safe or prudent for him to go. Certainly not for 10 weeks.

So which one is it???

[Nordly Beaumont]

I thought the button was symbolic. "If I can do this, I can handle camp." After all, undoing one button (which is as far as he got) doesn't get him undressed and in his jammies.

[GRChereck]

1 hour ago, Nordly Beaumont said:

I thought the button was symbolic. "If I can do this, I can handle camp." After all, undoing one button (which is as far as he got) doesn't get him undressed and in his jammies.

That was my impression, as well. Since it was a camp for disabled youth, I'm sure he knew there would be aides / volunteers to help with dressing, personal needs, etc. for campers who need it; but yeah, I agree the button thing was mainly about pushing the limits of his independence to prove to both himself and his mom that he could handle being away from her for an extended period of time. 

[bros402]

7 hours ago, Big Mother said:

I found the whole storyline of JJ's camp a bit confusing and unrealistic.

If the camp is geared for children with physical llimitations, he doesn't have to be able to close a button. They have staff for that.

If it's geared for able-bodied kids only, it's not safe or prudent for him to go. Certainly not for 10 weeks.

So which one is it???

It isn't about the button - it's about expressing his independence and trying to push himself. He set a goal for himself and set out to accomplish it. If he can even just try to do the button, he can do things at camp he thinks he might not be able to do or might otherwise be scared to attempt.

[msrachelj]

On 5/11/2017 at 6:54 AM, Crs97 said:

If we had an aide and he first put words in my kid's mouth about me and then countermanded my decision in front of my kid with his hand on my shoulder while he told me how things would be?  Maya wasn't rude enough to Kenneth.  Frankly, I hated the whole "use her vanity against her" plan.  We have seen her time and again make hard decisions that recognize his need for independence.  Badly done.

Maya was  a little OTT at the beginning, but I liked how calm she became once he was hurt.  It reminded me of Raycation.  I thought a ten-week camp was overkill.  Start with one or two weeks.  

Jimmy at the hospital made me LOL many, many times.

i think maya needs to realize she is not going to live long enough to be there for jj his entire life and needs to thinking of who is going to care for him in the future and not quite so controlling and borderline nasty at times. had she been helping him with personal things like dressing and bathing before kenneth arrived? i would think a boy jj's age would be mortified by this. and i can't help but feel  sorry for the other 2 children who always come second. i wonder how this is going to affect them later on. there can not be an easy answer, especially for parents taking care, and it is wonderful an uplifting to see, of a special needs child at home, who are not well off financially. so sad there is not more help available when you see how many people are taking advantage of other programs.

[GRChereck]

49 minutes ago, msrachelj said:

had she been helping him with personal things like dressing and bathing before kenneth arrived? i would think a boy jj's age would be mortified by this.

Presumably, since it was mentioned in the second episode and the season finale that she literally wrote the book on how to care for him (in the latter ep, Kenneth even said he had disagreed with her method of putting him in the bath and found a better way.) :) I imagine she was doing the lion's share of it, but I'm sure she also had to have taught Jimmy and (as they got bigger) the two younger siblings some of this stuff (like in one of my favorite episodes, "Sick Day," they would've had to pick up the slack with caring for JJ so Maya or Kenneth wouldn't risk infecting him).

 

1 hour ago, msrachelj said:

i think maya needs to realize she is not going to live long enough to be there for jj his entire life and needs to thinking of who is going to care for him in the future and not quite so controlling and borderline nasty at times.

Ray actually brought up that issue in "Cheater" (another fave of mine), though he was thinking of it in terms of having enough money to both support himself and make sure JJ will always be taken care of; and in the follow-up, "Runaway," Jimmy and Maya gave him and Dylan a (somewhat) reassuring talk about how they're aware that they're all eventually going to die, including JJ (Jimmy: "But until then, the not-dead one of you will be there... Or, after that, your children." Maya: "Who will also die"). As for Maya, I think she definitely seems to have toned down from the first few eps or so, but she still has her moments where she has trouble letting go of this child around whom she has spent the last 16-17 years building her life; hopefully, s.2 will find her trying to figure out who she is outside of him, which I think would help her all the more with letting JJ be his own person.

 

1 hour ago, msrachelj said:

and i can't help but feel  sorry for the other 2 children who always come second. i wonder how this is going to affect them later on. there can not be an easy answer, especially for parents taking care, and it is wonderful an uplifting to see, of a special needs child at home, who are not well off financially.

Despite their having had to take a backseat to their brother's needs their whole lives, I think both Ray and Dylan -- and their relationships with each parent -- have been wonderfully developed. :) Dylan admires and wants to emulate her mother, and she loves scheming and indulging in her more playful side with her father, but she's learned a long time ago to be her own strong, independent person; as for highly intelligent but high-strung Ray, this whole first season has seen him go through a much-needed learning curve of balancing his own needs and desires with those of the rest of his family, though he shares surprising bonds with his mom (including organizational skills and a taste for fine things) and has benefited from the calming influence and simple wisdom of his dad. 

[Crs97]

1 hour ago, GRChereck said:

and i can't help but feel  sorry for the other 2 children who always come second

Welcome to the world of the special needs family where the guilt always abounds as we try and fail to obtain the mythical balance of making sure all children feel like  they are getting equal quality time and the best of us.