S05.E03: The Wedding Night

[Lily247]

Just now, magemaud said:

I don't think Sheila's admission to the world that she has never had an orgasm was a coded way of saying she's a virgin. More like sexually inexperienced. I can't imagine the show wouldn't play up the untouched aspect BIG TIME if she was, indeed, a Virgin Bride. 

 

Yea, I was thinking that she was either conveying that she was a virgin or had only had sex a few times..... like that she has never been in a LTR that included sex. Because if she was, then she needs to see a sex therapist before going on MAFS, that is too much for these "experts."

[okerry]

49 minutes ago, Matias130 said:

THANK YOU !!!!!

In my very early 20s I dated a "player" type for a brief perod of time. He made me feel like I was such an awkward freak because I still hadnt had sex with anyone at the 'old' age of 21. Had I been smarter, I would have told him that the quality girls with values wouldnt have touched him with a 10 foot pole (Luckily I never did it with him and wisened up a litle)

Good, glad you waited. And it's not that I'm "better" than anyone else because I was never promiscuous. I'm convinced that it's largely in the wiring, for me, and because of that I did have a loving relationship for my first experiences. I wanted nothing else. And it only convinced me that the last thing I wanted was some stranger, or casual friend, who cared nothing about me to just use me for a little meaningless fun.

To keep this on topic, I just have a feeling that Sheila is the same way but Nate is so used to girls who love casual sex with practically anyone that he'll think Sheila has something seriously wrong with her.

And I'l bet that resident sex expert, whatever her name is, will have no clue what the problem is.

[Evil Queen]

59 minutes ago, magemaud said:

I don't think Sheila's admission to the world that she has never had an orgasm was a coded way of saying she's a virgin. More like sexually inexperienced. I can't imagine the show wouldn't play up the untouched aspect BIG TIME if she was, indeed, a Virgin Bride. 

Agree they would so play up the virgin bride thing if that was the case. We would hear about it every time an "expert" mentioned Sheila's name. 

57 minutes ago, Matias130 said:

Yea, I was thinking that she was either conveying that she was a virgin or had only had sex a few times..... like that she has never been in a LTR that included sex. Because if she was, then she needs to see a sex therapist before going on MAFS, that is too much for these "experts."

I figured she wasn't a virgin but either just hasn't had the right partner in things..as well as maybe not many experiences and has never taken care of things herself. I agree that if its something else to the point she would need a sex therapist this is far from the place for that because not one of those "experts" is qualified for that job. They would just be pushy and tell her how she has to do it this way so it would happen. I think most of us know get the same feeling on Nate and how he will be once he finds out she hasn't. He will try to be the "macho" I can make this happen man. So will she just fake that it does and lie or tell the truth and it will case issues as time goes on? 

46 minutes ago, okerry said:

To keep this on topic, I just have a feeling that Sheila is the same way but Nate is so used to girls who love casual sex with practically anyone that he'll think Sheila has something seriously wrong with her.

And I'l bet that resident sex expert, whatever her name is, will have no clue what the problem is.

The stupid so called "sex expert", Rachel is such a joke. She has no clue at all about even being one and isn't really one yet for some reason she is being called that. She would never get any problems in that area IMO. Her and Pepper both wouldn't. They would just keep pushing to just do it or do something freaky as they drool over the possibility of it happening (remember the tantric sex lady?). I agree that Nate is used to girls like that and finding a hook up in some club or wherever while Sheila is far from that. Which also shows their age difference/maturity levels as well. 

[lazylou]

Enjoyed reading the customary snark!  

I like all the people on this season. The matching seems better to me...true...Danielle really seems too old for Cody, and the height difference is awkward...not that I can't think of real life Mutt and Jeff couples. I thought the "eXperts" would have learned a lesson about geography.  Is Cody going to move to the city?  Danielle has two big dogs, so maybe the country will work for her, assuming the commute to her job is realistic.

I am cheering for them all, but especially Anthony and Ashley, because they really seem to like each other.  Also, having similar ethnic background bodes well, as does the fact that both seem to come from intact families, IMO.  Nate and Sheila seem to share similar religious beliefs as well, though clearly there are family issues on Nate's side.  Wonder how Sheila is going to feel about Nate's brother living with them!  

It seems the theme this season may have to do with family interference.  

Is it my imagination, or do the episodes seem to move more rapidly and be less repetitious than past seasons?  Editing clearly is still careless, but on the whole I think the episodes are more interesting.  Of course, the presence of cameras guarantees these shows are not reality...just reality for tv.

[Drogo]

Social media discussion belongs in the Spoiler thread. 

[MsPH]

On 28/04/2017 at 6:02 AM, Racj82 said:

I would never ever go on this show. I would be petrified that my looks wouldn't hold up to some great standard by the potential wife but also every part of me would be picked apart by viewers of the show. I feel like guys always get it the most. It's the least shocking thing ever to me that the women in these marriages mainly have the issues with looks out the gate. I think men get dragged a lot for being shallow but I see the reverse even more in real life. I'm glad Ashley still seems genuinely into the guy. 

It's everyones prerogative to date whatever and whomever they want but I would hope people on this show would be much more open in terms of attraction.

I could not care less how any of these people look personally. Last thing on my mind. My fear based on this episode is how much outside forces and actual intellectual attraction may get in the way. The physical seems to be there. But, relatives drama and different lifestyles may be the real kicker here.

I don't get the excessive scrutiny of these people's looks either. I know we're all used to seeing perfection on TV, but the participants on this show are all regular people. Anthony may not be a Ken doll, but he's cute enough IMO and I'm happy that Ashley seems to agree. I'm one of the few who also found Doug pretty cute (with a beard) while most were acting like he's a hideous troll who, IMO average, Jamie shouldn't have to settle for. I'm more bothered by Cody shaving his beard to end at his chin line. It just looks so odd and like he's got a tiny chin, but it should be easily fixed.

I'd be concerned about Ashley's sister too if I was Anthony. She seems a tad overly attached. For once I thought someone on this show gave good advice, when the pastor told them to keep their issues between themselves. I so agree! Of course if your partner is being abusive then you should talk about it with others, but normal relationship issues are something that should be solved between the people in the relationship IMO. It feels like betrayal to me to negatively talk about your partner behind their back. I know I want my friends and family to think well of my SO, so I'm not gonna bitch about him to them. I always feel super uncomfortable when others complain about their partners to me. It makes me want to stick up for the partner most of the time, since they're not there to defend themselves. It's also hard to forget all that stuff even if you try. All this is kind of moot though, since these people's issue are broadcast on TV for the world to see and strangers will still be harping on them years down the line. But that just proves that it's the negative stuff that sticks in people's minds.

I just can't warm up to Nate at all. Since the casting special, he's struck me as the kind of person who uses religion to try and keep their assholish tendencies in check, which usually doesn't work nearly as well as they think it does. Good people are good even if no one's watching or judging. If you need someone else, be it a god or a parent or a spouse, to keep you in line, then I for one will pass. It needs to come from within. I don't think he's over his player ways, let alone ready to be married considering he still had some random woman's shoes in his trunk during casting. I can't believe Pepper just laughed about it, but then again she seems to love casual sex, so it'd be a first if she saw something wrong with it, even if it's weeks before getting married. I feel for Sheila, because she seems like a bit of a prude (and I don't mean that in a bad way) while he's constantly trying to seduce her rather than get to know her. Add the live-in brother to the mix and I'd be running for the hills.

Not really seeing it with Danielle and Cody at this point. He's just too young, especially for a 30-year-old woman. I don't know why this show keeps matching younger men with older women. Has it ever worked? Women already mature faster and have a deadline for having kids, so it's just asking for trouble IMO. He seems like a horny teenager compared to her and the fact that he's never even lived with a girl before is a concern. I'll be surprised if healthy eating habits are enough to bond them for life.

At least they all seem somewhat attracted to each other, so that's a nice change! I don't want another season of people unable to even hold hands with their spouse, because it's so pointless.

[Soup333]

I really don't get the horny teenager vibe from Cody, but I guess time will tell. I'm not sure they're as good a match as the experts claim. The fact of the age thing might bother Danielle too much. I kind of feel like if she thought he was 29+ maybe it wouldn't be a problem but since she knows he's five years younger then there might be a tendency to blame all his behavior and their mismatch on his age, when it could just be general incompatibility. Again, time will tell.

Nathan, with all his lip licking and lip biting and leering, just turns me off more and more every time I see him.

Edited April 30, 2017 by Soup333

[Mindthinkr]

I think right now all the couples are overwhelmed by the whirlwind of what has just happened. I think we will begin to see who they really are about two weeks into when they are in their new married living situations. Most people can be polite and friendly to anyone for a limited amount of time but down the road....

[gonecrackers]

On the Sheila 'experience' topic, I recall her saying she 'hadn't had sex for quite a while'. That doesn't seem to be the case for Nathan. I get he likes her looks, great, but he could stop being so creepy about it. Staring, to me, is creepy.

On looks I actually feel everyone is again, in good shape, pretty good looking etc; it's just a what you like kind of thing as evidenced by differing opinions here. I'd rather see more flaws (maybe more 'fluffs'), in otherwise stellar people (for balance), but then again that would just be asking for trouble! And then they couldn't grab those bikini/boob/butt/chest shots for viewers eye candy.

I always look forward to when they move in together & wish they would show more of the nitty gritty of combining their worlds.

[Mindthinkr]

Have to agree with you on your above post @gonecrackers  

Not all couples have the same ideas on what makes a nice home. When the husband loves modern and the wife likes classic. Someone has to cave (would be interesting to see who). Tastes are different and I'm sure that it wasn't a heavy criterion for matching them up. Who's going to get more closet space? How many shoes can fit in a closet...typically women have more. Where is Cody going to store his smelly gym stuff? 

   The kitchen can also be a battleground. Every palate is different. What if someone loves spice(y) and the other eats bland. Are they both vegetarians or omnivores? Do you eat in front of a television or seated at a table? Who cooks and who washes up (I have a feeling that it comes under the Queen's new job description). 

I think it's going to take a few weeks before we get to the meat of this show. Yes, they did the breakdowns as promos, but they have to edit and keep us interested until we get to the main course. 

[humbleopinion]

What did Anthony say in the taxi in the Bahamas that got the reaction from Ashley..."my sister will hate you."

Did he say... I will keep her away from you...?

Can't quite catch it... I am too mesmerized by Ashley's Return to Amish hat...

[Jax7917]

On 4/28/2017 at 2:36 PM, peaceknit said:

I don't know, but Nate just seems kind of disingeneous to me, laying it on ultra thick, too Rico Suave. Nobody wants that all the time.

I agree 100 % .. I would be very turned off by a guy who talked like that all the time . The " my queen " business would make me nauseous . He comes off very phony/playerish

[silverspoons]

While all these couples seem to have gotten off to a better start then past seasons. my only hope for long term success is Anthony and Ashley.

While I don't normally care about age differences, I happen to be older than my husband, I think it might play a factor in with Nate and Cody. Shelia looked turned off when she found out his age, it was like she pre-judged him. Cody might want marriage, maybe because of his weight loss and being able to get a girl but he still seems like he kicks back and parties in the country. Shelia and Danielle just have more life experience and seem more mature.

I think Nate's brother is this season's "bus". All that hype about Tom's bus and Lilly was fine. If Shelia works for the school system and is a religious woman she should understand the importance of a few months of having the brother in the house so he can graduate from high school. If the brother was a freshman it would be different but he is a senior about to graduate.  Two weeks after I got married my brother in law moved in with us. I was an only child, always had my own everything and went to private schools(admit I was spoiled) so marriage was a big change. My husband was a surgical resident so he was busy.  My husband found out his little brother friend got shot at the bus stop and he bought a plane ticket and the brother came to us. I had never set foot in a public school , never had a sibling, and I was suddenly a guardian of a 14 year old. Turns out it was one of the best things that happened to me. Not only did I grow so much, his brother has been grateful for us and the education we got him. He calls every month and it has been 20 years and always says that we changed his life. It also made me take guardianship of 4 more kids over the years and I was a career focused women who didn't even know if I wanted kids. I hope Shelia's reaction to the brother is not the reason for separation or fighting.

[KateHearts]

18 hours ago, MsPH said:

He seems like a horny teenager compared to her and the fact that he's never even lived with a girl before is a concern.

Wow; now it's required to live with someone to determine if you're marriage-ready? I've got to heartily disagree with that one.

[MsPH]

3 hours ago, KateHearts said:

Wow; now it's required to live with someone to determine if you're marriage-ready? I've got to heartily disagree with that one.

Not when it's a normal marriage where you know and love the person you're about to cohabitate with. But I would imagine being stuck with a stranger is hard enough as it is, let alone if you have no experience with sharing your private space with the opposite sex (apart from your mom). And I'm not saying it's required, Cody just seems very young to me and I'm not sure he knows what he's gotten himself into.

[WichitaStateShock]

3 hours ago, KateHearts said:

Wow; now it's required to live with someone to determine if you're marriage-ready? I've got to heartily disagree with that one.

Personal opinion, but I strongly believe in living with someone before marriage that wau you know 100% what you are getting into but everyone has a right to a personal opinion.

[cardigirl]

25 minutes ago, WichitaStateShock said:

Personal opinion, but I strongly believe in living with someone before marriage that way you know 100% what you are getting into but everyone has a right to a personal opinion.

 

Traditionally, the statistics seemed to say that it was no indicator of a successful marriage. A higher number of people who lived together before marriage, divorced, than those who did not before tying the knot.  

Since moving in together with someone is more acceptable these days, a bigger indicator of whether or not a marriage succeeds seems to be the age at which the couple decides to make the commitment of either marriage or moving in together.

[humbleopinion]

As seen on the tease, if you made me to go to one of those pottery painting places I would lose my sh!t also...so standing tall with Cody.

[Wings]

4 hours ago, KateHearts said:

Wow; now it's required to live with someone to determine if you're marriage-ready? I've got to heartily disagree with that one.

Of course it is not required, it is a personal choice.  It is not for you, I gather  :^).   It isn't wrong to live together.  Some choose to never marry and have a committee relationship.  Goldie and Kurt are a good example.   I lived with my husband for 2 years before we married.  

8 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

As seen on the tease, if you made me to go to one of those pottery painting places I would lose my sh!t also...so standing tall with Cody.

Ha ha ha ha!  Me too!

[MrSmith]

On 4/28/2017 at 9:08 AM, cardigirl said:

Reiterating my dislike for the podcast model. I much prefer reading a recap. Not sure if there is a place on the site to register my vote against the podcasting of their reactions to this show, so I'll do it here.

This absolutely cannot be said enough. I hate, hate, HATE, HATE being forced to listen to stuff that I could get through faster reading and that I am confident is not enhanced by being audio or video. So much so that I avoid such content wherever possible.

[zxy556575]

Bottom line, people like what they like. I very much enjoy the podcasts. There's a lot more content and fun in them, I think. I understand others either can't partake or prefer not to, but I'm a fan.

[WichitaStateShock]

1 hour ago, cardigirl said:

Traditionally, the statistics seemed to say that it was no indicator of a successful marriage. A higher number of people who lived together before marriage, divorced, than those who did not before tying the knot.  

Since moving in together with someone is more acceptable these days, a bigger indicator of whether or not a marriage succeeds seems to be the age at which the couple decides to make the commitment of either marriage or moving in together.

Exactly, if they are young or moving in to save money the research suggest it is more likely to divorce. I still think it is smart to know what you are getting yourself into.

[Mindthinkr]

17 minutes ago, Lord Donia said:

Bottom line, people like what they like. I very much enjoy the podcasts. There's a lot more content and fun in them, I think. I understand others either can't partake or prefer not to, but I'm a fan.

Yes, but that speaks of you willing to let it be a choice. There are deaf people who participate in these threads and listening to a podcast isn't an option. There are also those of us who prefer to read. Nobody has been given a choice. It's listen or lump it. 

I'm happy for you that you enjoy it. In this particular instance I am pro choice. 

[MrSmith]

26 minutes ago, Lord Donia said:

Bottom line, people like what they like. I very much enjoy the podcasts. There's a lot more content and fun in them, I think. I understand others either can't partake or prefer not to, but I'm a fan.

Then they should offer a transcript of the podcast. I would read that. To be honest, if a deaf person lodged a complaint about the lack of transcript, Previously.TV would quite quickly find itself with a government regulator exploring its nether regions without surgical gloves (so to speak). Don't think they don't have to comply with the ADA.

[Drogo]

If you want to talk about podcast content, that's on-topic.  The existence of the podcast is off-topic.

[Evil Queen]

58 minutes ago, wings707 said:

Of course it is not required, it is a personal choice.  It is not for you, I gather  :^).   It isn't wrong to live together.  Some choose to never marry and have a committee relationship.  Goldie and Kurt are a good example.   I lived with my husband for 2 years before we married.  

Ha ha ha ha!  Me too!

I lived with my husband almost 2 yrs before we got married as well but I don't think living together or not is going to mean someone is ready for marriage or show you they are. Sometimes a weekend together or vacation together can show one if that person is what they want in a partner as well. Did Cody say he never lived with a woman before? Or spent a weekend away with one? As it is with them I just think the age difference shows with them. I also don't think she was to thrilled that she told the "experts" a year or 2 younger was ok and she ended up with a 5 yr difference in age. I think she may think he is ok looking from what we have seen so far, I just think that age difference is going to get in the way there too. While Nate totally shows his immaturity with his behaviors (shoes in trunk while trying to get on a show about marriage, licking lips at Sheila, "my queen"). Sheila has so far come off as a mature woman. So you have to wonder how long she can handle the difference in age. As well as was she asked about being with a younger man and was she ok with it being an option? Either way though we know the "experts" are notorious for not listening to likes/wants/thoughts by those applying/picked for the show. 

[okerry]

2 hours ago, cardigirl said:

Traditionally, the statistics seemed to say that it was no indicator of a successful marriage. A higher number of people who lived together before marriage, divorced, than those who did not before tying the knot.  

The theory is that men, especially, are happy to sign up for free sex and housekeeping with none of the legal responsibilities of marriage but that does not mean they actually want to marry this woman. If they do, it may be for the wrong reasons - feeling obligated, it seems convenient - but that does not always mean they're really committed and can still walk away much too easily.

[Mindthinkr]

I stated in the beginning that I thought there might be issues with Anthony and Ashley. It's looking to be about her sister but I suspect there's going to be much more than that. Italian mother's (I've personally known dozens so I'm trying not to stereotype here) are very choosy about how they envision their son's being taken care of by a wife. It's a phenomenon in Italy right now that most young men live with their mothers into their 30's-40's because they expect an easy kind of life. Maid service. Laundry service. Short order cook. They don't marry until Mama wants grandies. You get the picture. I'm hoping that with Ashley's shared heritage that she can cope. It won't be easy for her adjusting with her sisters words flowing into her ears constantly. I hope her Dad can get sis to back off a bit if she continues to be a buttinski. 

I'm hoping that Anthony is a modern day man and supports his wife and acknowledges her pressures. Not hit her with a demand list (cut off your sister or else). 

[bichonblitz]

One of the guys is 26 and one is 25. Is this really an age where a guy is looking for marriage and committment? At that age, they should be dating a lot and having fun until they find the "one".  I thought the premise of the show was that they chose couples based on the fact that they have been out in the dating world for quite a while and can't seem to find the right one.  What are they doing matching them with women in their 30's?  I feel like Nate is in this for his 15 minutes of fame and to have his mug on camera. No way is he serious.  

[WichitaStateShock]

31 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

One of the guys is 26 and one is 25. Is this really an age where a guy is looking for marriage and committment? At that age, they should be dating a lot and having fun until they find the "one".  I thought the premise of the show was that they chose couples based on the fact that they have been out in the dating world for quite a while and can't seem to find the right one.  What are they doing matching them with women in their 30's?  I feel like Nate is in this for his 15 minutes of fame and to have his mug on camera. No way is he serious.  

It depends. I'm from Kansas and most people I know are married by 26 regardless of gender. I got married at 26 but my husband was a late bloomer and married me at 36.

[humbleopinion]

If Nate is doing this for some fame...hello Nick... then he should have sent the memo to his mother.

She wouldn't have reacted so strongly if she knew her "queen" status was just temporarily being bestowed on another woman.

[Mindthinkr]

She being Nate's mother? Then yes, I agree. 

[humbleopinion]

Nate should have had his mother wear one of his "I'm Not Impressed" t shirt products to the brunch.

True that.

[Hockeymom]

4 hours ago, Mindthinkr said:

Italian mother's (I've personally known dozens so I'm trying not to stereotype here) are very choosy about how they envision their son's being taken care of by a wife. 

As an Italian mother, I can tell you that the only thing I'm choosy about is my son's happiness. He can "take care" of himself. I didn't raise him to expect a wife to do the heavy lifting. Ultimately, they should be taking care of each other. I thought I'd have all these prejudices, and "no girl is good enough for my son" attitude when he started bringing girls home. 

Turns out, I love my son's girlfriend! She is nothing I would ever have picked for him. But I love that she makes him happy. I love that they are kind to each other. I love that theirs is a healthy relationship - No drama, no games. He respects her feelings, and she respects his. So I'm happy that he has this wonderful thing in his life. 

I will continue to find things about her to love. Because he loves her, and I love him.

[KateHearts]

9 hours ago, wings707 said:

Of course it is not required, it is a personal choice.  It is not for you, I gather  :^).   It isn't wrong to live together.  Some choose to never marry and have a committee relationship.  Goldie and Kurt are a good example.   I lived with my husband for 2 years before we married.

I never said I didn't believe in it- in fact, my husband and I *did* live together before marriage- and we've been together for 40 years! My objection was that the comment implied that living with someone would be an indicator of marriage readiness.  I think sometimes it's easy to move in without considering the relationship as a long-term commitment. As Judge Judy says, "playing house" doesn't always translate well into marriage and real-life. 

Now if the poster meant that Cody had no idea of what having women in your house involved in general, well maybe that's true.  My husband has 4 brothers and their house growing up was a zoo.  They didn't know what it would be like to share space with a girl.

[Evil Queen]

9 hours ago, Mindthinkr said:

I stated in the beginning that I thought there might be issues with Anthony and Ashley. It's looking to be about her sister but I suspect there's going to be much more than that. Italian mother's (I've personally known dozens so I'm trying not to stereotype here) are very choosy about how they envision their son's being taken care of by a wife. It's a phenomenon in Italy right now that most young men live with their mothers into their 30's-40's because they expect an easy kind of life. Maid service. Laundry service. Short order cook. They don't marry until Mama wants grandies. You get the picture. I'm hoping that with Ashley's shared heritage that she can cope. It won't be easy for her adjusting with her sisters words flowing into her ears constantly. I hope her Dad can get sis to back off a bit if she continues to be a buttinski. 

I'm hoping that Anthony is a modern day man and supports his wife and acknowledges her pressures. Not hit her with a demand list (cut off your sister or else). 

I didn't get the impression his mom was that way to him but who knows. She seemed happy about things so far. Didn't they say their moms got along really well and exchanged numbers at the wedding? I think the sister will end up being some what of an issue but a wait and see how much of one at this point. 

8 hours ago, WichitaStateShock said:

It depends. I'm from Kansas and most people I know are married by 26 regardless of gender. I got married at 26 but my husband was a late bloomer and married me at 36.

I was 26 when we got married..a few months shy of 27. My husband was 34 at that point. I do think the age issue just will always depend on who the people are as well but from what we see so far those guys don't see the best ones for marriage right now. They have shown their immaturity (more so Nate then Cody though). Yet with this show it will also be how the women are or aren't ok with the guys younger than them. 

 

Hockeymom, Good for you and how you are handling it all. That is how it should be IMO. 

[Neurochick]

On 4/28/2017 at 1:51 AM, humbleopinion said:

Nate's little brother is not Nate's mother's other kid?

Is he the other son of Nate's Dad?

When Nate's mother ask if she was still Nate's queen...you knew she wasn't going to like the answer...she was going to hate any woman that dethroned her.

As least she doesn't live in Chicago to glare at Sheila at church, at family gatherings.

His brother looks just like the dad, who probably grew up listening to Richard Pryor.

Nate's mom needs a few weeks in a padded cell.  I know black don't crack but she looks mad young, she probably grew up with her son, but the woman needs to take several seats.  She has NO faith because if she did believe in God, she should say, "how do I know God didn't have a hand in this?"

[Snarklepuss]

3 hours ago, KateHearts said:

I never said I didn't believe in it- in fact, my husband and I *did* live together before marriage- and we've been together for 40 years! My objection was that the comment implied that living with someone would be an indicator of marriage readiness.  I think sometimes it's easy to move in without considering the relationship as a long-term commitment. As Judge Judy says, "playing house" doesn't always translate well into marriage and real-life. 

Now if the poster meant that Cody had no idea of what having women in your house involved in general, well maybe that's true.  My husband has 4 brothers and their house growing up was a zoo.  They didn't know what it would be like to share space with a girl.

Wow, so many of us lived with our husbands before marriage!  I moved in with mine 9 months before we got married, although we were engaged at the time. We didn't do it as a "trial run" but just to be together sooner and here we are 37 years later.  I don't really think it matters that much in the long run.  When two people are in love, of course they're going to be very motivated to make things work at first.  A lot of relationships don't end until after several years so when people live together up to two years, that's still early enough for them to be in the "honeymoon phase".

Plus I don't think even having lived with a woman could prepare any man for marrying a complete "shtraynger" (to borrow the pronunciation of Jamie Otis).  That's a whole 'nother ball game entirely and one I can imagine is not conducive to success.

[MrSmith]

7 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

Plus I don't think even having lived with a woman could prepare any man for marrying a complete "shtraynger" (to borrow the pronunciation of Jamie Otis).  That's a whole 'nother ball game entirely and one I can imagine is not conducive to success.

I think I could do it. I'm pretty calm and unflappable at this point in my life. Of course, I probably would never put myself in that situation, anyway. And certainly at the age these people on this show are, I would never have succeeded.

[yb125]

It is hard to how one would or should react in such a unusual situation. Even with many arranged marriages the couples have seen each other before hand and family members have vetted them.

 

Also regarding the podcast I do prefer reading the summaries as it gives me the option to do enjoy only phone without earphones which aren't always available or appropriate.

[Boofish]

On 4/28/2017 at 0:02 AM, Racj82 said:

I would never ever go on this show. I would be petrified that my looks wouldn't hold up to some great standard by the potential wife but also every part of me would be picked apart by viewers of the show. I feel like guys always get it the most. It's the least shocking thing ever to me that the women in these marriages mainly have the issues with looks out the gate. I think men get dragged a lot for being shallow but I see the reverse even more in real life. I'm glad Ashley still seems genuinely into the guy. 

It's everyones prerogative to date whatever and whomever they want but I would hope people on this show would be much more open in terms of attraction.

I could not care less how any of these people look personally. Last thing on my mind. My fear based on this episode is how much outside forces and actual intellectual attraction may get in the way. The physical seems to be there. But, relatives drama and different lifestyles may be the real kicker here.

I'm always shocked how many people think only beautiful attractive people deserve to date and be married if they are on television. I think Anthony is adorable :)

Nate standing up for his wife spoke volumes of his character. Good for him. He was empathetic but forceful without being mean or disrespectful. 

Edited May 2, 2017 by Boofish

[love2lovebadtv]

On 4/27/2017 at 9:38 PM, Gem 10 said:

Can't wait for Nate to tell Sheila his brother will be living with them.  Oh boy !  Bummer.

The brother is this season's bus lol. 

[okerry]

4 hours ago, Boofish said:

I'm always shocked how many people think only beautiful attractive people deserve to date and be married if they are on television. I think Anthony is adorable :)

It's not that they "don't deserve to date and be married." This was a case of Ashley being far more attractive than her match and very often that doesn't work. She looked gorgeous but he's standing there with his hair gooped up and his skin pasty and covered with heavy stubble. I'm glad Ashley seems to like it, but many women would not. He got lucky, lol.

[Evil Queen]

41 minutes ago, okerry said:

It's not that they "don't deserve to date and be married." This was a case of Ashley being far more attractive than her match and very often that doesn't work. She looked gorgeous but he's standing there with his hair gooped up and his skin pasty and covered with heavy stubble. I'm glad Ashley seems to like it, but many women would not. He got lucky, lol.

Yes but see this is how you look at him. I think when we watch things like this we all have to remember our tastes are going to be different from their's and each other's. Like you say Ashley is more attractive but yet I find her to be even with him in the looks department. There are those that have said Cody is good looking but for me I don't see it. I don't see ugly but just not my type....which is fine since I'm not matched with him. LOL Which btw, all of the guys seem to have heavy stubble going but only Anthony's seemed to have been picked at for some reason compared to the other 2. Which again facial hair on guys isn't for everyone either, me I don't mind it. As I said before I like my husband having his and the one time he shaved it all off I couldn't stand it. I don't see pasty skin but I have noticed at many times the lighting is so bad that it makes them all look off in their skin tone. Watch scenes with the others and each one of them is a different shade depending on where they are with lighting. At this point with this season I actually think in the looks area they are all on a pretty even level. Its beyond that where everything changes. 

[Mindthinkr]

12 hours ago, MrSmith said:

I think I could do it. I'm pretty calm and unflappable at this point in my life. Of course, I probably would never put myself in that situation, anyway. And certainly at the age these people on this show are, I would never have succeeded.

I read sometime back on this thread (? Might be another on this board) about doing this show with older people. On the one hand we know ourselves and our tastes better, have gotten our ya ya's out, and not be so superficial about our choices. We might look deeper. On the other hand younger people are more likely to wing things and be impulsive enough to try this. 

I'm older but if they had experts (proven ones IRL) match us for our compatibility, shared interests and lifestyle I might give it a go. It's a tough sell to make it work with the I Me Mine generation. I wish them all the best of luck sincerely. 

[Snarklepuss]

3 hours ago, Mindthinkr said:

I read sometime back on this thread (? Might be another on this board) about doing this show with older people. On the one hand we know ourselves and our tastes better, have gotten our ya ya's out, and not be so superficial about our choices. We might look deeper. On the other hand younger people are more likely to wing things and be impulsive enough to try this.

I don't know, I think older people could be just as bad or worse.  There's always the danger that the older people that would be up for something this risky and impulsive would be the train wrecks that have been divorced 5 times because they have horrible relationship skills.  You know, people that can't look in the mirror and expect a lot but can't reciprocate in kind, or have a lot of character flaws and don't see how they sabotage their relationships (and themselves).  You know, the men with big bellies and "grandpa" pants that expect their mate to be 20 years younger with trim, athletic bodies, or the women that are looking for a millionaire so they can be a "desperate housewife".  Unless the show were kind of picky about who they allowed to be cast and didn't allow those types on the show.

[Kareem]

Glad this guilty pleasure show is on again. I think the couples are going to be interesting.  Initial reaction is that the strangest people so far are the sister and that mother.  Wow.

After reading the comments here, I wondered why a few said Danielle doesn't seem to be at all into Cody.  What did I miss??  Seems next week, he says he's not feeling it?  Halp!  And TIA.  

[humbleopinion]

I'm going to my "While You Were Sleeping" theory of how you know someone is attracted to you...The Lean In.

Looking at Ashley and Anthony you see how they lean in towards each other for the photos, conversation... molding themselves towards each other.

In the movie, Joe, Jr. and Jack(RIP Bill Pullman) discuss how you lean in (you have to do the hand motion) to show interest.

Gonna give Danielle a pass for now...she may be reserved, not used to the spectacle of being the center of attention with the camera crew and producers prodding her to emote plus a towering giant of a stranger husband looming large over her.

We shall see...

[gonecrackers]

Danielle seems teeny & like most people tower over her; she's probably used to it.

I agree on the "lean in"  @humbleopinion. I like to watch body language & it can be telling.

I'm curious as to Cody's change of heart in the previews.

[Mindthinkr]

37 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

In the movie, Joe, Jr. and Jack(RIP Bill Pullman) discuss how you lean in (you have to do the hand motion) to show interest.

I get the 'lean in' move. Could you please clue me in on what this hand movement is?