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Soft Kitty

Lisin

By Lisin
in Current Events & Politics

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fishcakes
fishcakes
ClareWalks
ClareWalks

And their non-union Chinese equivalent (Simpsons paraphrase), PANDAS!

ClareWalks
ClareWalks

This thread is badly in need of BABY PENGUINS! 

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fastiller

fastiller

I think I need a soft kitty (though the ones left here so far are great!): I work for my brother. At work there’s a client on whom I’ve had something of a crush*, which I had resigned myself would never be reciprocated. I had a feeling – from nothing concrete – that the client is a DJT supporter (or at the very least not a supporter of HRC).  Anyway, at Thanksgiving dinner my brother was talking about this client and said something about “well, his candidate won…”, so confirmation of my previous theory.  I guess the silver lining here is that it gives me more of a reason to put paid to the crush, right?

*at 47 years of age, the entire concept of having a crush is to me very funny.

  • Love 5
stillshimpy

stillshimpy

(edited)

Crushes can be awesome at any age, fastiller :-)  

As seen in London ...

Oh, like they should talk.  Brexiters.  

I am now humming, "beets on fleek dip".  Thank you for that.   

The dog in my profile picture is named Oscar and my other dog is Puddles.    I knew a really good photographer where we last lived and she took their portraits.   Here's one of them.  Oscar is available for free hugs :-) 

Oscar%20and%20Pud%20White%20background%2

Edited by Lisin
Fixed quote box thing for you :)
  • Love 12
fastiller

fastiller

Thanks @stillshimpy - this crush hasn't been awesome at all.  He's the king of mixed messaging.  Standing close (flirting), talking close (flirting), talking about things totally not work related (flirting); then being all business (zero flirting), only business (zero flirting); then falling off the face of the planet for weeks at a time (zero flirting (obvs)).  

Oscar & Puddles made my day!

  • Love 4
Lisin

Lisin

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2 hours ago, stillshimpy said:

Crushes can be awesome at any age, fastiller :-)  

As seen in London ...

Oh, like they should talk.  Brexiters.  

I am now humming, "beets on fleek dip".  Thank you for that.   

The dog in my profile picture is named Oscar and my other dog is Puddles.    I knew a really good photographer where we last lived and she took their portraits.   Here's one of them.  Oscar is available for free hugs :-) 

Oscar%20and%20Pud%20White%20background%2

That's adorable.

I used to have a dog named Puddles too! 

  • Love 3
stillshimpy

stillshimpy

On 11/28/2016 at 11:53 AM, fastiller said:

Thanks @stillshimpy - this crush hasn't been awesome at all.  He's the king of mixed messaging.  Standing close (flirting), talking close (flirting), talking about things totally not work related (flirting); then being all business (zero flirting), only business (zero flirting); then falling off the face of the planet for weeks at a time (zero flirting (obvs)).  

 

Oh marvelous, one of those types.  You have my sympathy and I am willing to share my chocolate.  I hope he gets fun or you get another crush!  A worthy crush :-) 

 used to have a dog named Puddles too!

What kind of dog?? Picture? Was your Puddles essentially the best dog ever, too?  

Puddy came with her name.  My husband saw her on Petfinder 6 years ago, looking incredibly pathetic and with the name Puddles, to make really sure no one would ever think, "What a good idea! Adopt a dog with a name that implies incontinence! If only she had a brother named Piles, we'd have a complete set!"   So we bought a steam cleaner and adopted her.   

She's fully housebroken and came that way,  apparently the rescue's reverse psychology worked on me.  "We must save that dog! No other sane person will!"  *crickets* "Of course, sanity isn't much of an obstacle for us, at the best of times..." 

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aradia22

aradia22

Quote

Thanks @STILLSHIMPY - this crush hasn't been awesome at all.  He's the king of mixed messaging.  Standing close (flirting), talking close (flirting), talking about things totally not work related (flirting); then being all business (zero flirting), only business (zero flirting); then falling off the face of the planet for weeks at a time (zero flirting (obvs)). 

Admittedly I'm working off limited info but I can read those messages loud and clear. They say "I know you have a bit of a crush and I enjoy female attention but I'm not interested in pursuing anything with you." He wants to bask in the glow of casual flirtation on his schedule. You don't have to see it as particularly nefarious but he's doing what he needs to in order to make himself feel good and as long as you don't shut it down, he assumes you're cool with it. He doesn't think of it as leading you on. Flirting that doesn't go anywhere can be fun if you're both on the same page. If you're not, let him know.

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fastiller

fastiller

11 hours ago, stillshimpy said:

Oh marvelous, one of those types.  You have my sympathy and I am willing to share my chocolate.  I hope he gets fun or you get another crush!  A worthy crush :-) 

&

9 hours ago, aradia22 said:

Admittedly I'm working off limited info but I can read those messages loud and clear. They say "I know you have a bit of a crush and I enjoy female attention but I'm not interested in pursuing anything with you." He wants to bask in the glow of casual flirtation on his schedule. You don't have to see it as particularly nefarious but he's doing what he needs to in order to make himself feel good and as long as you don't shut it down, he assumes you're cool with it. He doesn't think of it as leading you on. Flirting that doesn't go anywhere can be fun if you're both on the same page. If you're not, let him know.

You're both so right.  I think when it started he was trying to figure out his crap with someone else and that got cleared up, so his actions changed.  From my point of view: he was really a great source of strength during the period not long after my husband died so I think I transferred some of my feelings of grief over losing my husband at that time & confused myself.   (He was a different sort of help than my family & friends were: somewhat removed so not as likely to get emotional at my husband dying, just emotional on my behalf.)  

ANYWAY!

Thank you both and thank you to the rest of the P.tv family for all the laughs and soft kitties during these post-election weeks.

  • Love 3
aradia22

aradia22

I'm having a weird couple of hours where I'm feeling a mixture of emotional and physically manifested depression. I tend to just wait it out and the sensible part of me (as opposed to the poisonous part that whispers mean, demoralizing things that prey on my insecurities and stresses) knows I'm being ridiculous and illogical but the soft kitties aren't doing anything for me right now. I need less of a kitty to distract me and more of a blanket to keep me cozy while I wait things out. Any ideas?

  • Love 3
stillshimpy

stillshimpy

(edited)

What's your favorite childhood movie?  Even one that will allow you to get a good, targeted cry out, where you focus your sadness and just let.the.hell.go can be of great use.  Watch that, eat your favorite snack and turn off all forms of news for a bit.   

Do a cleanse, do an emotional cleanse, would be my point. 

Edited by stillshimpy
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stillshimpy

stillshimpy

Oh...and try to get extra exercise tomorrow, help kick up some endorphins.  I'm barely joking when I say that I think there's something in the moon phase  because I have been solidly in the same boat the last two days.   So today I made myself finish three projects and at least I felt like I was getting stuff done.  Mini-goal setting helps with depression if you're the sort of person who gets a lift when you finish something.  I know I am.  I swear half of the stuff I do, I do because I'll be so frelling happy when it's behind me.  

  • Love 5
ebk57

ebk57

@aradia22, I know you don't drink or like sports (because those are the things I'd do go get me out of a mood.  Okay, I'd drink anyway...).  I wish there was a way you could go see your favorite show, but that's not the nature of theatre...

I hope you find a volunteer match.  And meanwhile, I like the favorite TV show, snack or book.  Those always help me.  Best of luck!!

fastiller

fastiller

9 hours ago, aradia22 said:

I'm having a weird couple of hours where I'm feeling a mixture of emotional and physically manifested depression. I tend to just wait it out and the sensible part of me (as opposed to the poisonous part that whispers mean, demoralizing things that prey on my insecurities and stresses) knows I'm being ridiculous and illogical but the soft kitties aren't doing anything for me right now. I need less of a kitty to distract me and more of a blanket to keep me cozy while I wait things out. Any ideas?

&

8 hours ago, stillshimpy said:

Oh...and try to get extra exercise tomorrow, help kick up some endorphins.  I'm barely joking when I say that I think there's something in the moon phase  because I have been solidly in the same boat the last two days.   So today I made myself finish three projects and at least I felt like I was getting stuff done.  Mini-goal setting helps with depression if you're the sort of person who gets a lift when you finish something.  I know I am.  I swear half of the stuff I do, I do because I'll be so frelling happy when it's behind me.  

Okay, so, hear me out here: I'm wondering if we P.tv folks haven't maybe sort of synched up (a la tribal menstrual cycles) as to moods: I've also been more down over the past day or two.  Like, I'd been on an upswing, then BAM! something happened on Monday afternoon/evening.

@aradia22, I second @stillshimpy & @ebk57: even if you can just get out for a 20 minute walk, just a couple of times around the block, especially if it's sunny near you, can do wonders.  Finding the volunteer group would be good too; it'd enable you to <<<BE THE CHANGE>>>.

If you need a cryer: my go-to is the Band of Brothers episode Why We Fight - guarantees a good cleansing cry.

How many people here are members of the 'secret' Facebook group Pantsuit Nation?  There are local chapters; the one I belong to has much information on volunteering.

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stillshimpy

stillshimpy

For today's exercise in "well, we could all use a lift...."  here's a winter's tale (non-Shakespeare edition).  I hope it doesn't bore the snot out of anyone, if it does, my apologies.  Just trying to throw out some "good things exist!" vibes. 

I've mentioned elsewhere that for the last four years, pretty much all we did was move, buying and selling houses, fixing them up and working like demons. By we, I basically mean me.   It was hard work and may I never see another paintbrush for a good long while.   There was a lot of stuff that I just sort of had to "oh marvelous, a catastrophe....and only me here, in the entire state, to deal with it..." because my husband kept having to head out six months ahead of me for his actual job, while I stayed behind in a state where I had no family and got.shit.done.  

So last January, I flew out to California -- and here's a clue as to how "wtf is even happening now?" life was at the time -- I have no recollection as to why.  It wasn't a house hunting trip, it might have been for our anniversary, I genuinely don't remember.  I just remember having to get a TSA approved guitar case to bring my husband's guitar out to him.   For all I know, that's why I was there.  Seriously, hectic year, can't recall. 

I got home at 11:30 p.m. in St. Louis....and it was snowing.  Really, really snowing.  The taxi driver had mild-hostility about the fact that he had to drive me all the way out into West County in deplorable conditions and we got to my street and it was like all things white, icy and blowing had taken up residence for good.  My driveway was four inches under and counting.  Luckily, I'm kind of a generous tipper, so the taxi driver ended up having a better night than he initially thought he would, but man, did he ever earn that in hazard pay.  My driveway was massive, by the way.  Not some polite little slab o'concrete.  Nope, that thing stretched on for about 30 yards and I had to schlep on down it, practically wearing my suitcase as a hat because those tiny little wheels died in protest at the sight of all that snow.  

And I didn't even care because all I could think was "FUUUUCCCCKKKK.  My dogs are being dropped off in the morning and I'm going to have to figure out how to attach that plow to our riding mower....and it freaking outweighs me and....fuuuuuuuuuu....okay, snap out of it.  Deal with it the morning.  There's literally nothing you can do about it right now, so go to sleep and dream up a thaw or something."  

So I collapsed into bed, slept soundly, got up in the morning, opened my curtains with an air of grim determination and beheld....my plowed driveway.  

For a moment I genuinely had a moment of wondering, "Wait, what the....did I ...will that into being or something....?  Did I sleep plow?"  

And I looked up and down the street.  No one else's driveway appeared to be plowed and I'm genuinely not exaggerating, that thing ran all the way down one side of the house and ended in an RV pad, so I had somehow slept through someone plowing right along the wall that I was sleeping next to.

It finally dawned on me that it was my neighbor, Ron when I thought to look for footsteps and there they were, coming in from his yard.  I usually keep Thank You cards around and I had kind of a nice one, all decorated with cute cartoon dogs, so rather than go stand in the 15-degree weather, I got to drink hot coffee and write out the card, before delivering it.   He was, and I feel sure is, such a nice man.   Just a retired guy who, "Had my plow out anyway" (at what had to be about 5 in the morning).  

Just saying, for anyone looking to feel a little better, just randomly doing something nice for someone else really does help.  You feel good about life, the recipient is almost always thrilled  and it just makes you feel better about life.   Sure, things suck at the moment, but when that happens,  really nice things can still go on.  

I really don't think I will ever forget that feeling of opening up the drapes and for a second, it was like a late Christmas present.  Plow Santa had been there! 

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