S06.E05: Hello, Goodbye

[Rebecca]

Matt's brother moved in now too!?! Or did you mean his "long lost, addict" son? Unbelievable if she has his brother living there too now!

[ginger90]

I seem to recall Amber going off on her mother years ago about her "shitty" parenting and her farher being alcoholic.  Her father passed away at 50 following liver surgery.

Where is Gary's mother? I wonder if she just doesn't wat to be on the show?

[starfire]

10 hours ago, BravoAddict72 said:

Tyler is such a self absorbed jerk. His wife is leaving for 30 days and he can't even be bothered to drive her to the airport? He lets the producers do it. It's like it never even occurs to him that him being so distant and unsupportive of Cate has nothing to do with her problems. I just want to get him and his mother in a room and slap both of them. I hope she gets the help she needs to get well and drops his sorry butt.

I noticed that too. He leaves Cate to be driven by others to the airport, leaves Nova in the care of April, and drives off into the sunset with no responsibilities.  He acts like a punk 15-year old kid.

[JBC344]

13 hours ago, starfire said:

I noticed that too. He leaves Cate to be driven by others to the airport, leaves Nova in the care of April, and drives off into the sunset with no responsibilities.  He acts like a punk 15-year old kid.

Not to defend Tyler but they actually explained this a few times in the episode.  Tyler actually had to meet and pay the workers that are doing construction on their house.  I don't know if there was a time constraint or a mix up but when Tyler drops Cate off at April's he is in a hurry because he says the guys have been waiting for 2 hours and he needs to get there and inspect/pay them.

Don't get me wrong Tyler can be a jerk but not taking Cate to the airport doesn't qualify.  I also tend to find that after 9/11 "airport goodbyes" are pretty useless.  You used to be able to walk with your loved one to the gate, wait with them, give them a proper send off.  Now your basically pulling up to a curb and saying goodbye.  I would rather have an intimate goodbye in my own home with my loved one than a rushed curbside goodbye.

[GreatKazu]

Meet and pay workers? He was paying them before the work was complete or after? I don't feel like checking my DVR.

[JBC344]

2 hours ago, GreatKazu said:

Meet and pay workers? He was paying them before the work was complete or after? I don't feel like checking my DVR.

I got the impression that he was paying them for work they had completed, which was why he was panicking about being late to meet them with "their" money.  He was sort of saying as in he felt bad that he was making them wait and it was unprofessional.  Truth be told it was in an odd way the most "grown up" stance to see Tyler take.  It was a few seconds of dialog but it really seemed like he was making their new home a priority.  If anyone who has lived through any home construction knows, you are usually overly nice/accommodating to people who are working on your home.

[Raynedon]

On 9/15/2016 at 11:16 PM, mamadrama said:

I still think she has a mental illness, however. 

I most definitely agree.  There's something 'off' about the way she interacts with people, whether it's her parents, her daughter, boyfriends, other teen moms, producers... her behavior is the same.  I think she's terribly unhappy and lonely and covers it with the way she pretends to be aloof and unbothered when it's apparent it drives her crazy (which doesn't take much!) and then she lashes out.  

[CofCinci]

20 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Where is Gary's mother? I wonder if she just doesn't wat to be on the show?

I wonder if she still has that vintage Pepsi vending machine on her front lawn.  Those go for $$$$ and it was painful to watch the machine exposed to the elements for so long.

[Christina]

The production team was probably flying with her, to continue to tape as they arrived. 

[imjagain]

On 9/16/2016 at 5:29 PM, WhosThatGirl said:

I don't know. I think once Farrah made the decision to keep Sophia, the dynamics have always been uneven. I always remember a few things. Farrah didn't want to be pregnant but Debra wouldn't let her not and wanted Farrah kept it, knowing full well Debra was going to be doing the heavy lifting.

And I don't know, I feel like Farrah has always had the upper hand.  She was going out constantly and leaving Sophia with her parents a lot. Granted Debra and Micheal fought with her about it, but did that stop her? Kind of, I guess but then by season 2 was the knife incident and obviously Farrah moved out and that's when Debra started to handle her with kid gloves because she wanted to see Sophia and yes now it's worse because she wants things from Farrah, like money and perks but it started a long time ago.

I agree in part.  I just rewatched Farrah's 16 and pregnant  and while you do see glimpses  of  Farrah (the monster we all know)  she was  different.  She let Debra lecture her about dating and well everything, without much of Farrah's nasty attitude. She was still a snooty girl. If you watch it,  you can see as soon as she has Sofia everything starts shifting.  It little thing I noticed,  like Michael tells not to change Sofia on the table,  and Farrah  says why can't I? It's interesting to watch. 

I think by the time Teen Mom started Farrah was well...  Farrah. But the 16 and pregnant Farrah seems to bite her tongue. Debra is still crazy just different crazy. 

Edited September 18, 2016 by imjagain

[SPLAIN]

Quote

 It little thing I noticed,  like Michael tells not to change Sofia on the table,  and Farrah  says why can't I? It's interesting to watch. 

I believe that was actually Farrah's grandfather saying that to her. He was concerned about the baby rolling off the table.

Those poor grandparents. We never saw them again.

[imjagain]

1 hour ago, SPLAIN said:

I believe that was actually Farrah's grandfather saying that to her. He was concerned about the baby rolling off the table.

Those poor grandparents. We never saw them again.

Yes,  her grandfather did tell her that. Farrah has always loved leaving sofia on counters. 

However,   Micheal did tell her not to change Sofia on the table,  once she said why not?  Micheal said something like, because Sofia likes to soft things.  

Twisted my ankle yesterday on my daily run,  so I've been laying in bed most of the day watching Hulu and Netflix. I was thrilled to see Hulu had 16 and pregnant. 

[WhosThatGirl]

5 hours ago, imjagain said:

I agree in part.  I just rewatched Farrah's 16 and pregnant  and while you do see glimpses  of  Farrah (the monster we all know)  she was  different.  She let Debra lecture her about dating and well everything, without much of Farrah's nasty attitude. She was still a snooty girl. If you watch it,  you can see as soon as she has Sofia everything starts shifting.  It little thing I noticed,  like Michael tells not to change Sofia on the table,  and Farrah  says why can't I? It's interesting to watch. 

I think by the time Teen Mom started Farrah was well...  Farrah. But the 16 and pregnant Farrah seems to bite her tongue. Debra is still crazy just different crazy. 

Yup. Teen Mom season one, Debra and Micheal did try to force a hand of some kind to her but I mean.. their tough love wasn't that tough. Farrah kept going out and going on dates. And then the second season pretty much forced Farrah to be a parent because of the situation with Debra and Farrah calling the police. And then Debra was desperate to see Sophia so I think she was willing to do whatever Farrah asked.

But I believe Farrah kept the baby to spite Debra instead of placing her for adoption like Debra asked her to. 

[geekamonggeeks]

10 hours ago, WhosThatGirl said:

But I believe Farrah kept the baby to spite Debra instead of placing her for adoption like Debra asked her to. 

I think Farrah kept the baby to get back at her mom for not allowing her to get an abortion. Farrah was a scared teenager facing a huge, life-changing event, and her mother forbade her from making her own decision because it went against Deb's morals. Farrah's a fucked-up person, but you look into this kind of shit and realize why. Like Sophia, I don't think she ever stood a chance at a normal life. 

[Jax7917]

i dont know how anyone stays around farrah for longer than 2 minutes at a time. she most definitely has a personality disorder. Anything anyone says to her is always followed by a bitchy remark. She 100 % loves the control she has over everyone because of her money. I think that's the only reason her parents stay around because I don't believe anyone would choose to be around her for any other reason. Also, I did find it pretty funny how Simon went off and did activities on his own after she paid for his trip. I'm guessing as soon as she invited him to hawaii, he took her up on the offer because he knew she'd pay for the flight and he'd have a place to stay, followed by her inevitably picking a fight with him, and him needing space and taking off to do his own activity . I def don't believe anyone is with her for her charming personality.

[ReadMeLattice]

I don't care what Debra says, she clearly has some kind of domestic violence problem. She hit Farrah when she knew for a fact she was on camera...come on, we're really supposed to believe she didn't do worse off camera? 

[GreatKazu]

1 hour ago, Lm2162 said:

I don't care what Debra says, she clearly has some kind of domestic violence problem. She hit Farrah when she knew for a fact she was on camera...come on, we're really supposed to believe she didn't do worse off camera? 

When watching Teen Mom, I want to hit Farrah, too. In fact, I want to hit a lot of people on this show.

Edited September 19, 2016 by GreatKazu

[CofCinci]

3 hours ago, geekamonggeeks said:

I think Farrah kept the baby to get back at her mom for not allowing her to get an abortion. Farrah was a scared teenager facing a huge, life-changing event, and her mother forbade her from making her own decision because it went against Deb's morals. Farrah's a fucked-up person, but you look into this kind of shit and realize why. Like Sophia, I don't think she ever stood a chance at a normal life. 

Also, take into consideration that Daddy Derrick died too during the pregnancy and no one helped the pregnant, young Farrah process the confusion and loss.

[ReadMeLattice]

54 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

When watching Teen Mom, I want to hit Farrah, too. In fact, I want to hit a lot of people on this show.

Yeah, but that doesn't make Debra less crazy or less of an alcoholic. I have no doubt she really had a knife out when the police came. Her excuse was "she was cooking"-- yeahhhh ok. 

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

On 9/17/2016 at 7:57 PM, ginger90 said:

I seem to recall Amber going off on her mother years ago about her "shitty" parenting and her farher being alcoholic.  Her father passed away at 50 following liver surgery.

Where is Gary's mother? I wonder if she just doesn't wat to be on the show?

I could have sworn I saw Gary's mom in the crowd at the surprise party for Amber. I remember thinking how nice it was of Matt to invite her, too. 

[SPLAIN]

1 hour ago, Lm2162 said:

Yeah, but that doesn't make Debra less crazy or less of an alcoholic. I have no doubt she really had a knife out when the police came. Her excuse was "she was cooking"-- yeahhhh ok. 

It's hard to feel any sympathy for Farrah about this when she leaves her child in Debra's care for what? 85 percent of the time. If Debra was or still is some sort of abusive woman or an alcoholic, what does that make Farrah for allowing her child to be in the care of someone with such issues? We are not talking about a person in an abusive relationship who is fearful and is forced to leave their child with the other abusive parent due to circumstances. This is Farrah who supposedly has loads of money at her disposal. If she is in fact leaving her child with such a person, that makes Farrah even more despicable and just as bad as the so-called abuser and alcoholic. That makes Farrah the far more crazy one.

Edited September 19, 2016 by SPLAIN

[Uncle JUICE]

1 hour ago, MyPeopleAreNordic said:

I could have sworn I saw Gary's mom in the crowd at the surprise party for Amber. I remember thinking how nice it was of Matt to invite her, too. 

I wonder how many of the people at that party were not, in fact, part of the production crew. And yeah, Kyrstal counts as part of the production crew. 

[ReadMeLattice]

2 minutes ago, SPLAIN said:

It's hard to feel any sympathy for Farrah about this when she leaves her child in Debra's care for what? 85 percent of the time. If Debra was or still is some sort of abusive woman or an alcoholic, what does that make Farrah for allowing her child to be in the care of someone with such issues? We are not talking about a person in an abusive relationship who is fearful and is forced to leave their child with the other abusive parent due to circumstances. This is Farrah who supposedly has loads of money at her disposal. If she is in fact leaving her child with such a person, that makes Farrah even more despicable and just as bad as the so-called abuser and alcoholic. That makes Farrah the far more crazy one.

Sure, but she was a lot younger then. Farrah is crazy, but that doesn't make Debra less of an abuser. I thought she was an abuser since the first episode of 16& Pregnant. She hit Farrah on television and was all crazy-eyed with the hyper-Christian emotional abuse (while clearly not actually being a Christian). Both of them are deeply damaged. I think Farrah likely has some kind of personality disorder like BPD but I've always thought Debra had BPD or NPD as well. That's the usual way of things. I don't think someone being an abuser means their victim is perfect or not crazy, not abusive themselves, etc. It just means they're an abuser. It doesn't absolve anybody else of anything. And Debra is one by all accounts. I think she'd abuse anyone around her and I think she's an addict. That doesn't say anything about Farrah being good.

[ReadMeLattice]

I also don't necessarily feel sympathy for Farrah. I just believe Debra was brandishing a knife and threatening people with it, and committed a crime.

[SPLAIN]

1 hour ago, Lm2162 said:

Sure, but she was a lot younger then. Farrah is crazy, but that doesn't make Debra less of an abuser. I thought she was an abuser since the first episode of 16& Pregnant. She hit Farrah on television and was all crazy-eyed with the hyper-Christian emotional abuse (while clearly not actually being a Christian). Both of them are deeply damaged. I think Farrah likely has some kind of personality disorder like BPD but I've always thought Debra had BPD or NPD as well. That's the usual way of things. I don't think someone being an abuser means their victim is perfect or not crazy, not abusive themselves, etc. It just means they're an abuser. It doesn't absolve anybody else of anything. And Debra is one by all accounts. I think she'd abuse anyone around her and I think she's an addict. That doesn't say anything about Farrah being good.

My only point, which seems to have gotten lost in my post, is Farrah is allowing her daughter to be exposed to the same vicious cycle. For all her ranting about being a wonderful mother and her previous claims about her mother being this abusive person, she has no qualms or concerns about putting her daughter's safety and welfare first by leaving her in that abuser's care. Farrah has fits and tantrums about needing her mother to be at her disposal to watch and care for Baby Goo. At least Debra went to get help for her issues. It was put out there that she attended anger management and was in therapy. Maybe that is why Farrah feels comfortable leaving her child in her care. But, if Debra is still abusive, I question any parent who leaves their child in that abuser's care. No excuses.

 

Quote

Both of them are deeply damaged

Yes. Debra could have been a victim of some abuse growing up or some toxic environment. Addiction is a disease. Farrah may get sympathy for having her mental disorders and for having been dealt abuse but then so should her mother. No winners here.

Edited September 19, 2016 by SPLAIN

[ReadMeLattice]

Yeah, I feel for Kail and Cate in that they did the same thing and it's REALLY hard not to trust your mother (as someone who had an abusive parent I totally understand the deep desire to trust and never give up), but when you're involving your kids you have to somehow put that child who longs not to be abused or disappointed again aside and put your own kids first.

[ginger90]

Leah using the baby talk voice in the car (not this episode) and then the same baby singing voice for the happy birthay song makes me wonder what's going through her head. (Not that I didn't wonder before that)

[ghoulina]

16 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Leah using the baby talk voice in the car (not this episode) and then the same baby singing voice for the happy birthay song makes me wonder what's going through her head. (Not that I didn't wonder before that)

Kids often use another voice, or persona, when nervous and uncomfortable. I mean, not always. Some kids are just imaginative. My daughter is always some sort of animal. But given how little Leah sees her mom, and how skeevy Matt is, I can see her using a funny voice as a defense mechanism.