Janelle Brown: Smarter Than Your Average Brown (Maybe)

[Sasha888]

Why doesn't she ever describe what she actually got in the box? She never goes beyond her usual "great, full-sized stuff" description. Full size of something I don't need is not a selling point.

BTW, if I were really interested, I'd rather pay the $10 than admit to knowing who any of the Brown's are! That plus I'd never want to help these grifters get more free stuff. Janelle and her boxes, Mariah with her coffee and several other things she's always plugging...ugh. Will just one of these assholes actually work for a living for once? They're exhausting, the whole lot of them.

Edited November 30, 2018 by Sasha888
Too many rathers!

[ginger90]

[laurakaye]

Her pantry must be stuffed to the rafters with all the extraneous stuff she buys, just so she can take a picture and make a post.

[ginger90]

Just now, laurakaye said:

Her pantry must be stuffed to the rafters with all the extraneous stuff she buys, just so she can take a picture and make a post.

She has to have some gastrointestinal problems with the way she eats and drinks. She switches between so many things. There’s nothing wrong with a variety in our diets but her choices appear to combat each other, to me. And she always seems to be confused by, or afraid of something.

[Sasha888]

Curl up by the fire with a glass of water. Healthy, simple, and calorie free!

But that wouldn't be Strive-worthy, now would it. :-)

[ginger90]

1 hour ago, Sasha888 said:

Curl up by the fire with a glass of water. Healthy, simple, and calorie free!

But that wouldn't be Strive-worthy, now would it. :-)

Ha! Or get out there in the snow, perhaps? I don’t know how much they got, but it could be an option.

She has two children at home, correct?

[Sasha888]

17 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

Or get out there in the snow, perhaps? I don’t know how much they got, but it could be an option.

She has two children at home, correct?

Good idea! Yes I believe it's still two at home. And Savannah may still be young enough to enjoy the snow...my nephew just turned 13 and spent the whole day sledding when they got some snow. Doesn't seem like a teenager thing to some people, but he liked it! I was still going sledding with friends when I was in high school. 

She has a dog too, some dogs like snow. Some, not all! :-) I had one who would walk about 3 steps in snow, then stand there holding up one paw, looking at me like "Well, IDIOT, now I've got snow caked between my paw pads. What are you doing just standing there, get over here and rescue me!" I sure miss that little darling.

[AZChristian]

50 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

Ha! Or get out there in the snow, perhaps? I don’t know how much they got, but it could be an option.

She has two children at home, correct?

Flagstaff got about 7.5 inches of snow.

[xwordfanatik]

#theyrenotinvegasanymore  #freezingourbuttsoffjustliketheydidinutah  #poorbabiestheyrenotusedtowinter  #shityoudthinktheywereinalaska  #ohnotheyhateearthquakes

[ginger90]

1 hour ago, Sasha888 said:

Good idea! Yes I believe it's still two at home. And Savannah may still be young enough to enjoy the snow...my nephew just turned 13 and spent the whole day sledding when they got some snow. Doesn't seem like a teenager thing to some people, but he liked it! I was still going sledding with friends when I was in high school. 

She has a dog too, some dogs like snow. Some, not all! :-) I had one who would walk about 3 steps in snow, then stand there holding up one paw, looking at me like "Well, IDIOT, now I've got snow caked between my paw pads. What are you doing just standing there, get over here and rescue me!" I sure miss that little darling.

We had a dog who loved the snow to play in. However, when she just needed to relieve herself, snow was a horror. So, I shoveled a long path through the yard in a circle so the poor girl would go. Loved that dog. Her name was Ginger, mine isn’t. 😀

[TurtlePower]

22 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Vegas? Too hot, let's sit inside and be lazy.

Flagstaff? Too cold, let's sit by the fire and be lazy.

Real inspirational, Janelle. I predicted months ago that Janelle would not embrace the opportunity to get out and shovel or enjoy the free, fun workouts that winter provides. Nothing motivates her unless the conditions are "just right", which they rarely are for this woman. 

[xwordfanatik]

Janelle's planets are not aligned, so she's not able to venture out and get any kind of activity.  Her horoscope probably tells her she's not to get off the sofa for 6-7 years.  

Next to come:  her eBook, telling us 101 ways to sit and be lazy.  Should sell like hotcakes (oh-oh, now she's thinking about food again.)

[TurtlePower]

4 hours ago, xwordfanatik said:

Janelle's planets are not aligned, so she's not able to venture out and get any kind of activity.  Her horoscope probably tells her she's not to get off the sofa for 6-7 years.  

Next to come:  her eBook, telling us 101 ways to sit and be lazy.  Should sell like hotcakes (oh-oh, now she's thinking about food again.)

Why does she think her body needs "extra nutrition" in the winter anyways? She's not on Life Below Zero digging herself out of a snow storm or hunting caribou for fuck's sake. She doesn't DO anything, her environment is the same--INSIDE!!!! 

[xwordfanatik]

It's a mystery to me.  It's not like she takes a mile run or a two mile walk every day or three times a week.  Her babies aren't babies any more, so why isn't she making activity a priority?  She doesn't have a 'normal' job where she's accountable for 8+ hours a day.  Janelle is one odd duck.

[Sasha888]

1 hour ago, xwordfanatik said:

It's a mystery to me.  It's not like she takes a mile run or a two mile walk every day or three times a week.  Her babies aren't babies any more, so why isn't she making activity a priority?  She doesn't have a 'normal' job where she's accountable for 8+ hours a day.  Janelle is one odd duck.

I agree. And she posts so much about anxiety. What the hell does she have to be anxious about? She doesn't have extremely young kids at home (I would think going from 6 kids down to 2 would seem like a lot less work!)...she doesn't have to work a real job...she doesn't have to share a kitchen with Meri anymore (ok, I'll admit I just added that one to the list purely for laughs)...WHAT exactly is she always stressing about?

I can think of some things she SHOULD be stressing out about - like how long can this gravy train possibly last, maybe stressing about how she's part of a family of nit wits who are so financially irresponsible that they never have a cent saved for a rainy day, or that she blew her inheritance AND her retirement on this "family" - but sadly, I don't think those are the things she's having anxiety about. If they were, she probably wouldn't have done those stupid things in the first place. 

[Pickleinthemiddle]

1 hour ago, Sasha888 said:

3 hours ago, xwordfanatik said:

It's a mystery to me.  It's not like she takes a mile run or a two mile walk every day or three times a week.  Her babies aren't babies any more, so why isn't she making activity a priority?  She doesn't have a 'normal' job where she's accountable for 8+ hours a day.  Janelle is one odd duck.

I agree. And she posts so much about anxiety. What the hell does she have to be anxious about? She doesn't have extremely young kids at home (I would think going from 6 kids down to 2 would seem like a lot less work!)...she doesn't have to work a real job...she doesn't have to share a kitchen with Meri anymore (ok, I'll admit I just added that one to the list purely for laughs)...WHAT exactly is she always stressing about?

I can think of some things she SHOULD be stressing out about - like how long can this gravy train possibly last, maybe stressing about how she's part of a family of nit wits who are so financially irresponsible that they never have a cent saved for a rainy day, or that she blew her inheritance AND her retirement on this "family" - but sadly, I don't think those are the things she's having anxiety about. If they were, she probably wouldn't have done those stupid things in the first place. 

SASHA888.  I bet that is exactly what she is anxious about, how they will manage after the show is gone.  Probably anxious about those 4 homes that still haven't sold.  How they won't be able to start on the new ones until that happens.  That is if they get more than what they owe on them.  True.  She should be able to make it a priority to walk at least 2 miles every day.  Should be able to do it in 45 minutes.  It invigorates and clears your head for the day.  I have 5 years on Janelle and can walk 10-16 miles a day.  

[deirdra]

100% of the calories in molasses come from carbohydrates, that is why it is added to animal feed to fatten them up in winter.

[suomi]

1 hour ago, deirdra said:

100% of the calories in molasses come from carbohydrates, that is why it is added to animal feed to fatten them up in winter.

I think you posted something similar recently and I meant to save it but I  forgot. You said that animals in feedlots eat  ___ and ___. It was quite sobering! TIA

[Sasha888]

5 hours ago, deirdra said:

100% of the calories in molasses come from carbohydrates, that is why it is added to animal feed to fatten them up in winter.

Why am I not surprised...Janelle seems to jump on every bandwagon that goes by! She declared molasses "a nutritional rock star" and looks like she bought an expensive, gallon size jug! So she can stir a tiny spoonful of it into her coffee!

My Mom would use it in recipes sometimes, so she'd have a little jar of Brer Rabbit Molasses in the fridge. It would last nearly forever, using only a teaspoon here and there. (Until my Dad discovered he discovered he liked molasses on his pancakes...then her molasses started disappearing faster! None of the rest of us would eat in on pancakes...eww. He was skin & bones his whole life and could afford the calories, but still...).

I've noticed in several of her posts, when she "discovers" a new food trend, she buys in bulk...seriously large quantities, as if she doesn't realize it's just her and 2 kids in her household, not 6 kids anymore. I highly doubt she is making meals for "the whole" family, as in bonus kids, sister wives, & the shared screwball. (I think we all know they keep to themselves unless forced together for filming.)

I don't believe a word of nutritional advice that comes out of Janelle's mouth. (She may be correct by accident once in awhile, like the broken clock that is right twice a day!)

[lookeyloo]

Not defending Janelle - but anxiety can be an issue for no identifiable reason. I am a case in point. Sometimes it will wake me up in the middle of the night. What do I have to be anxious about - nothing. 

[Marshmallow Mollie]

On 11/30/2018 at 7:35 PM, ginger90 said:

We had a dog who loved the snow to play in. However, when she just needed to relieve herself, snow was a horror. So, I shoveled a long path through the yard in a circle so the poor girl would go. Loved that dog. Her name was Ginger, mine isn’t. 😀

Same, and her name was Mollie ;) The best (or most aggravating depending on the circumstance) was when she would start to squat, but pop up real fast as soon as she felt the snow. Over and over again until I made her a little pooping dugout 🙄

I made the gingerbread latte this morning! The one from chocolate covered Katie, except switched the coffee and creamer amounts to 1T almond milk and 1C coffee. It is good! 

[TurtlePower]

2 hours ago, Sasha888 said:

Why am I not surprised...Janelle seems to jump on every bandwagon that goes by! She declared molasses "a nutritional rock star" and looks like she bought an expensive, gallon size jug! So she can stir a tiny spoonful of it into her coffee!

My Mom would use it in recipes sometimes, so she'd have a little jar of Brer Rabbit Molasses in the fridge. It would last nearly forever, using only a teaspoon here and there. (Until my Dad discovered he discovered he liked molasses on his pancakes...then her molasses started disappearing faster! None of the rest of us would eat in on pancakes...eww. He was skin & bones his whole life and could afford the calories, but still...).

I've noticed in several of her posts, when she "discovers" a new food trend, she buys in bulk...seriously large quantities, as if she doesn't realize it's just her and 2 kids in her household, not 6 kids anymore. I highly doubt she is making meals for "the whole" family, as in bonus kids, sister wives, & the shared screwball. (I think we all know they keep to themselves unless forced together for filming.)

I don't believe a word of nutritional advice that comes out of Janelle's mouth. (She may be correct by accident once in awhile, like the broken clock that is right twice a day!)

She reminds me of that one co-worker or relative who becomes a know-it-all after learning a little bit about something and the proclamations are never ending (and often incorrect). 

Janelle--unless you're burning lots of extra calories in winter by doing outside activities--which you are clearly not--there's no reason whatsoever for "extra nutrition". Please find a job more suitable for you and one that doesn't make you sound like an idiot. You are NOT good at this. 

[Sasha888]

Amen, @TurtlePower! She gives out Earth-shattering advice such as "vegetables are good for you, you should have lots of colorful veggies!" Good grief, who doesn't know that. Janelle has a firm grasp of the obvious!

When she isn't saying something any moron should know, she's giving out advice that's at best questionable, at worst incorrect (or at least unproven).

But mostly it's a daily litany of why it's just SO darn hard to get up off her duff. 

It amuses me to no end that for the big launch of her STRIVE gig, they had that conference room & seemed to be expecting a couple of hundred people...but only about 25 showed up. And one of them was our dear @toodles! Hey hey, Toodles! Thanks for taking one for the team so that we all got to hear a first hand account of the STRIVE launch!

They seemed to think that due to their awesome fame and her online certification, people would be lining up in droves to hire Janelle to be their "health coach"! 🤣🤣🤣

[Pickleinthemiddle]

1 hour ago, lookeyloo said:

Not defending Janelle - but anxiety can be an issue for no identifiable reason. I am a case in point. Sometimes it will wake me up in the middle of the night. What do I have to be anxious about - nothing. 

Agree.  I am the same way.  And on occasion it can morph into a panic attack. 

[Sasha888]

2 hours ago, Marshmallow Mollie said:

I made the gingerbread latte this morning! The one from chocolate covered Katie, except switched the coffee and creamer amounts to 1T almond milk and 1C coffee. It is good!

I see Chocolate Covered Katie's recipe is 1 cup milk and 3T strong coffee...your swap saves a lot of calories!

Though I admit, this Katie is a gal after my own heart...I too like a little coffee with my cream!

You guys got me curious, so I looked in my fridge thinking "there's no way I'll have molasses...the only thing I'd ever use it for is my Mom's molasses cookies, and I never really liked them that much (sorry Mom!)....

But by gosh there it was, a bottle of Brer Rabbit molasses! I guess you can't escape your upbringing!

[ginger90]

[xwordfanatik]

Isn't Daphne Oz the one that hosted a Duggar show awhile back, like the Brown tell-nothings with other hosts?

So is Janelle saying that she had been buying the bagged produce, and is now buying the un-bagged kind?  

I wash bagged produce as well as un-bagged.  Does she think no one else does this?  Janelle, it's not a new thing to wash raw produce.

[Sandy W]

18 minutes ago, xwordfanatik said:

Isn't Daphne Oz the one that hosted a Duggar show awhile back, like the Brown tell-nothings with other hosts?

So is Janelle saying that she had been buying the bagged produce, and is now buying the un-bagged kind?  

I wash bagged produce as well as un-bagged.  Does she think no one else does this?  Janelle, it's not a new thing to wash raw produce.

Janelle is hard pressed to come up with a daily Hot Topic to keep her Strive blog in play.  What's next, suggestions on extracting the most from your raw veggies by masticating for at least 30 seconds each mouthful?

[deirdra]

Janelle probably never ate fresh vegetables before.  Tater Tots & fast food don't need washing.

[Sasha888]

4 hours ago, Sandy W said:

Janelle is hard pressed to come up with a daily Hot Topic to keep her Strive blog in play. 

Yep...she's been at this awhile now, she's running out of recipes, tips, and "personal weight loss journey" stories to share.

She should sell LuLaNo, you just take selfies in unattractive clothing, and the money starts rolling in! 

Speaking of that...I'm not usually one to toot Meri's horn, but doesn't it seem she's doing that a lot more of that than the others? I'll maybe exclude Mykelti from this because she just started...but it seems like Meri's always posting a pic and hashtagging the name of each piece of clothing so people know which things she's wearing...I guess I'm basing this solely on what I see on this board, but I don't think I'm seeing Maddie, Christine, or Audrey doing nearly as much of that.

Christine is doing "car confessions" that seem to have no point whatsoever...if you're going to be posting on SM, at least throw some of that crap on and plug your clothing line. You know, "My Lula leggings are perfect for playing in the snow with my kids!" or "My Lula top was perfect for going to X to do Y". Shill that crap! It's ugly, you're going to have to work at it!

So I'll give Meri credit for that, by God she's going to keep posting her outfits and advertising that junk til somebody makes her stop.

(Plus it's just so much more entertaining for us, if they would post more Lula outfit pics for us to snark on. Throw us a bone, Christine!)

[New2this]

5 hours ago, xwordfanatik said:

So is Janelle saying that she had been buying the bagged produce, and is now buying the un-bagged kind?  

I wash bagged produce as well as un-bagged.  Does she think no one else does this?  Janelle, it's not a new thing to wash raw produce.

She might be talking about those plastic tubs of spinach or variety lettuce. I know it recently switched to not being able to recycle those in Flagstaff. I think you can still recycle produce bags at various grocery stores. 

Still washing any produce should not be a new concept!

[lookeyloo]

If it's a new concept to Janelle, maybe it is to her zillions of followers!

[TurtlePower]

12 hours ago, Sasha888 said:

Yep...she's been at this awhile now, she's running out of recipes, tips, and "personal weight loss journey" stories to share.

She should sell LuLaNo, you just take selfies in unattractive clothing, and the money starts rolling in! 

Speaking of that...I'm not usually one to toot Meri's horn, but doesn't it seem she's doing that a lot more of that than the others? I'll maybe exclude Mykelti from this because she just started...but it seems like Meri's always posting a pic and hashtagging the name of each piece of clothing so people know which things she's wearing...I guess I'm basing this solely on what I see on this board, but I don't think I'm seeing Maddie, Christine, or Audrey doing nearly as much of that.

Christine is doing "car confessions" that seem to have no point whatsoever...if you're going to be posting on SM, at least throw some of that crap on and plug your clothing line. You know, "My Lula leggings are perfect for playing in the snow with my kids!" or "My Lula top was perfect for going to X to do Y". Shill that crap! It's ugly, you're going to have to work at it!

So I'll give Meri credit for that, by God she's going to keep posting her outfits and advertising that junk til somebody makes her stop.

(Plus it's just so much more entertaining for us, if they would post more Lula outfit pics for us to snark on. Throw us a bone, Christine!)

I realize this is hypothetical but, bwahahahahahahahahaha! LuLaNo leggings in SNOW! I'd love to see how long that lasts (3 minutes?). That garbage is not made for "weather", especially cold weather. The best one to be trying to sell that crap is Janelle: "These leggings are so comfy sitting here by the fire doing nothing, because that's all they're made for."

[xwordfanatik]

Janelle could say, "look everyone, I've been doing my usual routine of sprouting on the couch, and my LLN leggings haven't ripped once!"

That "rip like toilet paper" just isn't true!  (but we've all seen the pictures.)

[ginger90]

[xwordfanatik]

Is recreational weed legal in AZ?  Isn't mary jane an herb or something?

Not that Janelle would do that, or suggest doing it on her Strive "blog."  (cough, cough.)

Yes, dear, I partake of the above pictured spices often.  Like, when I cook!  I can't believe she's just now "figuring it out."

[Sasha888]

Janelle needs to buy a thesaurus. Everything is a "rock star" with her. FFS woman, learn a few new words.

[suomi]

5 hours ago, xwordfanatik said:

Is recreational weed legal in AZ?  Isn't mary jane an herb or something?

No weed just for fun in AZ. UT and AZ are the most Mormon-y states and will Never legalize.

https://kjzz.org/content/588352/power-mormon-vote

"Utah soon will have a new medical marijuana law — but not the one approved by voters in the recent election."

https://www.sltrib.com/news/politics/2018/12/03/utah-house-passes-medical/

For all their big talk, the Browns can't leave the Mormon zones. For church mainstreamers, the fundies are the hussy you have to be nice to in public even tho she ran off with your friend's cousin's husband. And, because they are desperate to be relevant, the Browns get a kick out of that.

[Kohola3]

6 hours ago, suomi said:

For all their big talk, the Browns can't leave the Mormon zones.

You are probably right although I don't see them as Mormons or AUB or anything for that matter.  It's all about the Church of Whatever It Takes to Stay on TV. We never hear the words faith, prayer, God, heaven, preaching, "tennents" mentioned - nothing to indicate that they do anything "religious" anymore except to hawk their brand of polygamy.  Which has been an epic fail since they are clearly the worst examples of a happy poly family on the planet.

[TurtlePower]

16 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Here we go again with the proclamations everyone who doesn't live in a cave knows about! GAH!

"Spices are basically plants": Nuh-uh! You don't say! I had no idea where they came from, I just crawled out from under a rock!

"Think ginger": No shit, Janelle. My mom gave this to me when I was 4 and had tummy issues; that and peppermint. 

The way she writes this stuff is awful, too. No links to studies or citations to back up her claims, just........"proclamations". Idiot. 

[Natalie68]

19 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Wow.  So google got the work out she should have.

[laurakaye]

20 hours ago, ginger90 said:

So wait, now we add spices to our coffee?  No way!  I am still adding butter, like she said to do two weeks ago, and then the molasses from just a few days ago.  Pretty soon I am going to have to start drinking my coffee with a spoon over here.

[Sasha888]

2 hours ago, laurakaye said:

So wait, now we add spices to our coffee?  No way!  I am still adding butter, like she said to do two weeks ago, and then the molasses from just a few days ago.  Pretty soon I am going to have to start drinking my coffee with a spoon over here.

I know, what is with her obsession with adding all kinds of crap to her coffee lately? I looked at this latest recipe she mentioned, it includes adding black pepper in addition to the spices she has pictured. I like pepper, but it is NOT going in my coffee.

BTW her gingerbread latte recipe (which does sound interesting, I'll give her that) is hundreds of calories more than the k-cup cappuccinos I drink. Granted, I'm not getting all the rock star nutrition from that teaspoon of molasses...but you know, maybe I'll eat FOOD to get my nutrition, and not drink my daily allotment of calories while sitting by the fire.

It's like she sits there every day thinking "Well...I gotta post something for this Strive shit...and I'm sure as hell not going to work out, or cook...maybe I'll just look for more coffee recipes."

[suomi]

Pepper enhances weight loss, but adding it to coffee?! No Freakin' Way! (And I don't even drink coffee).

[Pickleinthemiddle]

6 hours ago, Sasha888 said:

hundreds of calories more than the k-cup cappuccinos I drink

This is why she can't lose weight.  Don't ever waste precious calories on beverages.  It needs to be saved for wholesome nutritious filling food.

[Pickleinthemiddle]

6 hours ago, Sasha888 said:

hundreds of calories more than the k-cup cappuccinos I drink

This is why she can't lose weight.  Don't ever waste precious calories on beverages.  It needs to be saved for wholesome nutritious filling food.

[Sasha888]

16 minutes ago, Pickleinthemiddle said:

This is why she can't lose weight.  Don't ever waste precious calories on beverages.  It needs to be saved for wholesome nutritious filling food.

Except wine. Wine does God's work. ;-P No seriously though, you're right and a real health coach would know that.

Health coach seems like a weird title to me. It kind of says "I didn't cut it as a nutritionist, or a certified personal trainer, or a Zumba instructor...so I'm gonna blog about putting shit in your coffee and call it being a health coach."

[Kohola3]

8 hours ago, Sasha888 said:

It kind of says "I didn't cut it as a nutritionist, or a certified personal trainer, or a Zumba instructor...so I'm gonna blog about putting shit in your coffee and call it being a health coach."

Well, she paid a lot of money for that catchy title.  Sycophants will roll with it and not even question what it means.

[Sandy W]

19 hours ago, laurakaye said:

So wait, now we add spices to our coffee?  No way!  I am still adding butter, like she said to do two weeks ago, and then the molasses from just a few days ago.  Pretty soon I am going to have to start drinking my coffee with a spoon over here.

She has literally hundreds of spices to work her way through and thousands of combinations thereof.  This should keep the Strive blogs alive throughout infinity.

I can hardly wait until she posts the concept of curry, chili or cayenne added to coffee to boost blood flow and invigorate one through the cold winter months.  For summer, the cooling effects of mint and citrus rinds will be touted.

Just drink your damn coffee straight Janelle and let the caffeine do the job it was intended to do, wake you up, so you can go about a productive day and actually accomplish something.

[Kohola3]

3 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

She has literally hundreds of spices to work her way through and thousands of combinations thereof. 

She and Pioneer Woman should get together.  That hack cook throws together all kinds of unrelated spices and seasonings and tortures perfectly fine food with them.  And then tops her creations with a whole" buncha" layers of crap as well.