Small Talk: The Polygamous Cul-de-Sac

[Pickleinthemiddle]

1 hour ago, Meowwww said:

Well, day one at work with the Minnesota mask mandate in place.  It was miserably hot today. It was mostly ok.   Only one lady came in with her young daughter, both without masks. She started to say she had a health condition, but quickly changed it to she forgot the mandate started today.  She apologized profusely, after I told her our business owner could be fined 25k and we never know who else is shopping here.  
so it wasn’t too bad.  And we NEED to nip this virus in the bud.  
 

You will get used to it.  I work in 90-100+ degree heat with no AC.  I wear mine 12 hours a day.  Yes there are days that I feel like I'm not getting enough oxygen, but now I'm fine with wearing it.  I actually feel like something is missing when I forget mine.  I try to keep several in the car.

[Gramto6]

I mask up whenever I go out which is twice maybe 3 times a month. I live in MT our Governor just mandated masks in all public indoor spaces and outdoor large gatherings. Sheesh people how hard is that? There are counties where the mayors are opposing it and people actually went to his home and protested. WTF is wrong with people? We have had sky rocketing numbers of new cases and more deaths...don't people think this through? Yes we are on the lower end nation wide, but how long will that last if these fools consider themselves above the rules? I am old (71) diabetic, at risk and I don't want one of these snowflakes to kill me!

Edited July 26, 2020 by Gramto6

[Gramto6]

10 minutes ago, Gramto6 said:

 

somehow a double post. clueless old lady here

Edited July 26, 2020 by Gramto6

[Sandy W]

Masks will not be mandatory in public establishments until August 1st in a community where one of the group shops I am part of is located.  This week, a young couple walked into the shop as the manager was opening for the day and busy setting up computer etc.  She left her purse visible and the couple dipped in and grabbed her wallet, she did not realize until later in the day what had happened.  The female wasn't wearing a mask and his was below his chin, giving a clear shot of both faces on the security cameras.  Hoist by their own petard!  No one ever said crooks are smart, if they had worn masks, it may have made it harder to ID them when they are caught and the owner has put their pictures on FB blast and it's being shared all over.

[Yeah No]

This was a rough week for me.  Monday the AC went and we didn't have a new permanent one installed until yesterday.  I got the portable rolling unit so at least we were cool at night.  I'm glad I got it because it'll come in handy when cleaning out dad's apartment.  He only had one window unit that worked and it isn't enough to cool the whole place in 90 degree heat like we've been having.  Speaking of that, my realtor is encouraging me to clean the apartment out now so he can list it.  So now hubbie and I are going down there this week to label things as "remove" or "keep".  I'm going to call 1-800-GOT-JUNK to get an estimate.  This is going to be difficult for me (not to mention expensive) but it has to be done and I'm really motivated.  The realtor is going to have contractors do estimates on different levels of renovation and we'll discuss what the best option is.  He seems to think that a little renovation might be worth it in terms of making the place more marketable and higher priced.  He is very optimistic and is telling me that the neighborhood is now up and coming and that a lot of young people that are disenchanted with Manhattan are looking for a better value in a more comfortable setting.  And it's even more attractive now that most office people are working mostly from home, so the commute is not so much of an issue. 

I'm surprised that this is not more traumatic for me.  I guess I've been dreading this for so long that now that it's happening I'm more prepared for it.  Unless it'll hit me when I'm there.  I know I'm not going to get out of this without experiencing a lot of difficult emotions.  At least this realtor has a calming effect on me.  I feel like my guardian angels sent him to me.

I have my own mask tale to tell.  Last week at the self checkout in Walmart a man was wearing his mask around his chin.  A tall woman politely asked him if he'd cover his face with it and he reacted rather arrogantly that she wasn't "from the store" so he didn't have to do it.  Then he whined about how uncomfortable it was to wear it.  I was so cranky from having no AC by that time that I blurted out, "Everyone's uncomfortable in it.  Just put the mask on and stop being a smart ass, OK?"  (VERY unlike me, LOL).  He started to sass me when hubbie told him that it's people like him that won't wear the mask that will spread the virus.  Then the tall woman told him that while she's not from the store she's a nurse and works on the front lines.  He still didn't do it.  If any of us weren't so exhausted from the heat (it was up near 100 that day) we might have told someone from the store because our state has a mask mandate so he could be asked to leave if he didn't comply.

Truthfully, though, he is the rare exception around here.  I used to think most CT people were "sheeple" who never colored outside the lines and were timid about everything.  It becomes a ghost town around here around dinner time and there is like zero nightlife.  Well, now those are looking like some pretty attractive and "safe" qualities right now, LOL.  I thought this place was soooo boring when I first moved up here 20 years ago.  I wondered if we had made a mistake.  I watched "Sex and the City" and felt homesick.  I finally got over that and now things have changed so much I have absolutely NO desire to live in NYC again.  These days "boring" is a very good thing and equals "safe". 

Despite the Walmart guy, it looks like CT is supposedly one of the only states considered "on track" with the virus.  We saw a sudden spike today but they explained that these were numbers that weren't counted somehow 2 months ago from a lab that had neglected to report them.

Hubbie actually had a limo. job last night driving someone from the local major airport to their home about an hour away.  He was a young man who acted like if he didn't absolutely HAVE to travel by plane he wouldn't have.  He said his plane was practically empty.  The airport was a ghost town.  Even though he was at a very safe distance from my husband in his new stretch limo. behind a metal and glass partition (with no leaks - I plugged up the hairline cracks on the sides near the windows) He voluntarily wore a mask and didn't call anyone on the phone.  Plus he seemed appreciative of the intentionally "pandemic friendly" limousine.

 

[Irate Panda]

Happy Birthday @suomi !!!

[Kohola3]

8 hours ago, Yeah No said:

He seems to think that a little renovation might be worth it in terms of making the place more marketable and higher priced.  He is very optimistic and is telling me that the neighborhood is now up and coming and that a lot of young people that are disenchanted with Manhattan are looking for a better value in a more comfortable setting. 

Not sure about other areas of the country but properties in Michigan are getting snapped up as soon as they hit the market.  A friend's niece had one open house and sold their place that same day for over asking.  Most people are afraid to have strangers walking through so are delaying putting houses up for sale so the pickings are slim.  Hopefully you find that same thing to be true with your Dad's place.

8 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Then the tall woman told him that while she's not from the store she's a nurse and works on the front lines.  He still didn't do it.

A very sad commentary on the times. I would love to deny healthcare to anyone with Covid who has not been wearing a mask or have deliberately been in large crowds.  Let's thin the ranks of the selfish and thoughtless.  Sadly, those are the ones who seem to survive but spread it to others.

[TurtlePower]

2 hours ago, Kohola3 said:

A very sad commentary on the times. I would love to deny healthcare to anyone with Covid who has not been wearing a mask or have deliberately been in large crowds.  Let's thin the ranks of the selfish and thoughtless.  Sadly, those are the ones who seem to survive but spread it to others.

All the arguing over masks certainly has taken a toll on my mental health. I'm afraid to go out anywhere for fear of someone becoming violent over being told to wear one. It's only a matter of time before someone carries out a mass shooting over it. I wear a mask and keep my head down, in and out as quickly as possible. My fellow humans are scaring me. Speaking of humans................

Given the recent news of the Pentagon releasing previously classified information on UFOs. I for one believe the military people coming forward with information as it becomes less "fringe" as they are no longer seen as loony.  I'm putting in for aliens in 2020 (or, maybe they're visiting our planet, checking it out and then locking their doors, getting the hell away from here).

https://nationalpost.com/news/newly-transparent-pentagon-program-may-shed-light-on-ufos

[Kohola3]

30 minutes ago, TurtlePower said:

All the arguing over masks certainly has taken a toll on my mental health. I'm afraid to go out anywhere for fear of someone becoming violent over being told to wear one.

I have just decided that to address masks is just asking for trouble anymore. I am living like I am the only one who can control what happens to me, I cannot count on the rest of "humanity" to care.  I don't go out except to have groceries brought to my car or be outside in an open area and I still carry my mask in case I come near people.  The only thing that I will do is phone the manager of a store that I might shop at and tell them that I will no longer come there when I know their employees are not required to wear masks.  They may as well be informed as to why they have lost my business.

33 minutes ago, TurtlePower said:

I'm putting in for aliens in 2020 (or, maybe they're visiting our planet, checking it out and then locking their doors, getting the hell away from here).

Yeah, o self respecting alien would be caught dead on earth right now.  Hell, I wish I could fly away to a better planet!

[Rabbit Hutch]

On 7/25/2020 at 9:07 AM, Kohola3 said:

Thanks for the travel advice, @Rabbit Hutch, back safely from my short sojourn to visit my sister.  I thought traffic was pretty much normal with loads of trucks and cars out and about.  Of course, since I've been back things have really started to tank with cases sky rocketing all over the place even in their part of Indiana which has been relatively spared.  Glad I went when I did.  Only made one stop each way and we were isolated on their 33 acres so I felt perfectly safe.  Did miss our usual shopping and dining out fun but we did get a carry out which we ate in a park by the river so that was our big day out.

So, to be safe, I am self quarantining for two weeks just to be on the safe side.  

Safe travels to you, I love that part of the west and would love to live in Montana but too far from family and too late in life to pull up all roots and go.  Hope you get your wish to retire in that area!

@suomi, I hope your birthday was great.  I'd kill for a takeout meal from OG but the closest one is over an hour away.  Love their breadsticks!

I'm so glad you went and had a great time, Kohola.  Getting out really helps to realign one's perspective on things.  Wow, 33 acres...sounds like paradise to me.

Next time when I come in from the road (which will about 4 months since I left the house) we will stay at home unless it's to go to a doctor's appointment or to get necessary groceries. Although to be honest after being OTR for so long it's really not a hardship for us to stay in.

Thanks, Kohola, for the well wishes.  Moving to the West is a bucket list item for us, and I'm doing everything I can to make it happen!  😏

[Kohola3]

An interesting podcast from NPR about why shaming non-maskers is an approach that does not work.  Food for thought - it's about 14 minutes long.  Doesn't make me any less angry and the idiots but also confirms why yelling at them is futile.

[TurtlePower]

40 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

An interesting podcast from NPR about why shaming non-maskers is an approach that does not work.  Food for thought - it's about 14 minutes long.  Doesn't make me any less angry and the idiots but also confirms why yelling at them is futile.

Yelling at them definitely does not work. I never acknowledge or address anyone not wearing a mask, I just scoot by as quickly as possible to avoid their germs. People need to come to the realization on their own that masking up can help prevent the spread of virus-containing droplets--and actually care and want to help. 

And I get it. A mask can cause me all sorts of problems due to my being on the spectrum, but lamenting about it does no good and all the arguing certainly makes anxiety worse. Besides, no one actually cares what one's excuse is, even if it's a legitimate one. Wear the mask or be banished. Luckily I have found ones I can mostly tolerate and one I even enjoy wearing (it has rhinestones!). Sometimes, however, in noisy stores I cannot get my words out and stand mute. 

I feel like people could stand to be a little kinder on both sides. 

[Yeah No]

So my I guess my husband and I are unkind now because we said something to a mask resister.  Truthfully I doubt I'll ever say that to anyone again.  Keep in mind that I was burning hot for 3 days in 95 degree heat and by that time I felt like a sub-human creature from the black lagoon and more cranky thank I'd been in years.  I am definitely one of those post menopausal women who overheats in this kind of heat without air conditioning. 

But I don't think kindness works with them either.  Nothing works, but at least this asshole knows now that if he comes to my town again and walks into Walmart without a mask he might get aggravation for not wearing one.  At least I know we caused him some aggravation.  Why should we be alone in being aggravated for his selfishness?  This guy was not doing it because of his "rights", he was just a selfish prick.  I also doubt he was from around here.  And I guarantee that if we told the store personnel about it they would have asked him to put the mask on or leave.  I have seen it before.  So I don't think we were unsuccessful if we at least caused him some aggravation.  This is a very blue state.  Even the red is tinged with blue around here.   So the mask resistors are in the vast minority and there's definitely no movement of them, so I'm not afraid of saying something to them in a public store.  They're very outnumbered here and we are pretty protective of our town.  I probably wouldn't have done that if it were somewhere else.   

My husband is in the recliner right now laughing and chanting "We don't take kindly to people who don't take kindly to people who don't wear masks around here". (South Park reference). 😉

Edited July 26, 2020 by Yeah No

[Yeah No]

5 hours ago, Kohola3 said:

Not sure about other areas of the country but properties in Michigan are getting snapped up as soon as they hit the market.  A friend's niece had one open house and sold their place that same day for over asking.  Most people are afraid to have strangers walking through so are delaying putting houses up for sale so the pickings are slim.  Hopefully you find that same thing to be true with your Dad's place.

I think it might be the case although I don't want to be too optimistic.  The realtor is not one of those overly-positive people and even he says he doesn't think selling it will be a problem given the current situation.  I think you're right about people being hesitant to have people walking through their place.  Plus I think that since the Spring market didn't happen at all and they feel uncertain about the future, lot of people are putting off selling until next year.  Meanwhile there are ever more people looking to get out of Manhattan where the prices are insane and square footage claustrophobic.  Now that people are spending more time at home, suddenly they realize they need more breathing room.  Plus this building has a small garage and a large parking lot with cheap prices (you can pay hundreds a month for a parking garage space in Manhattan).  Suddenly city people are seeing the advantages to being able to keep a car and be close to both the city and the suburbs.  It's one of the reasons my parents wanted to live there in the first place.  It was like having one foot in the city and one foot in the suburbs.  And that's the kind of life I always knew.

[Rabbit Hutch]

3 hours ago, TurtlePower said:

...Given the recent news of the Pentagon releasing previously classified information on UFOs. I for one believe the military people coming forward with information as it becomes less "fringe" as they are no longer seen as loony.  I'm putting in for aliens in 2020 (or, maybe they're visiting our planet, checking it out and then locking their doors, getting the hell away from here).

https://nationalpost.com/news/newly-transparent-pentagon-program-may-shed-light-on-ufos

This part of your post reminded me of Enrico Fermi's Paradox, or where are all of the aliens of the universe and why haven't they made substantial contact with us?  It's been years since I read his book, but basically his math indicates that there are too few advanced civilizations on other planets, and those that do exist are too far away from we a**-backwards earthlings to count.  However, I think I recall that someone very recently has come up with the math to refute the Fermi Paradox, but I've been too busy trying to survive to catch up on it.  Have you seen this?

[Kyanight]

It's already been a crazy year so far, and now we have all these hurricanes!  I hope everyone stays dry and SAFE!!! 

Edited July 30, 2020 by Kyanight

[Kyanight]

I hope your birthday was FANTASTIC, Suomi!!   : )

Edited July 30, 2020 by Kyanight

[Teafortwo]

21 hours ago, Yeah No said:

At least this realtor has a calming effect on me.  I feel like my guardian angels sent him to me.

So happy for you, Yeah No! Even though it will no doubt be a very emotional time when you do the clean-out, it is fantastic that you found this wonderful realtor. I'm happy to hear about the nice, conscientious client your husband drove, too, and that you're happy with being in CT. I am wishing I lived in a stand-alone home or at least a townhouse, and seriously considering a move. I'd have to sell my apartment first and then find something much less expensive, as I still am unemployed. We lived in CT when I was in Jr. high and high school and although it was very difficult for me as a "city child" (like Eloise hahaha), these days I find myself dreaming of our wooded lot with its beautiful trees and birds. I am not sure where I can find the energy to pack and move, much less make these huge decisions, but seeing you mustering your courage to go and take care of your father's place, I'm hoping will inspire me. I really, really love my apartment but I need to be somewhere that I feel safe walking outside. My neighborhood is safe but as it's gotten so hot people are not wearing masks as much as they were even a couple of weeks ago. Taking a walk on a country or even suburban road would be heaven.

[Teafortwo]

9 hours ago, Kohola3 said:

An interesting podcast from NPR about why shaming non-maskers is an approach that does not work.  Food for thought - it's about 14 minutes long.  Doesn't make me any less angry and the idiots but also confirms why yelling at them is futile.

I'm glad you enjoyed your visit to your sister! One of my friends, who is in her fifties, short and VERY feisty (former union stage manager on Broadway), keeps taking it on herself to "educate" non-maskers. I keep trying to get through to her that there is NO upside. In normal times, no one can predict another person's reaction to anything a stranger says, even hello - let alone in these crazy times.

[Absolom]

I restrict myself to glares and/or avoiding because you're right you have no idea the reaction that might spring forth.  I do think living in single family homes makes a huge difference in spread as it's so much easier to avoid people except when shopping.  

[laurakaye]

Happy belated birthday, @suomi!

[Rabbit Hutch]

18 hours ago, Kyanight said:

I have not.  But I think there might be more than a grain of truth in H.G. Wells "War of the Worlds".   

"From the moment the invaders arrived, breathed our air, ate and drank, they were doomed. They were undone, destroyed, after all of man's weapons and devices had failed, by the tiniest creatures that God in his wisdom put upon this earth. By the toll of a billion deaths, man had earned his immunity, his right to survive among this planet's infinite organisms. And that right is ours against all challenges. For neither do men live nor die in vain."

If aliens were not light beings or something of that nature, I wonder how they could survive all of our microbes?  Viruses, bacteria, fungus spores - a plethora of deadly crap just waiting to multiply in anything they can infest.  

I don't watch it that often, but sometimes I will catch part of an episode of Ancient Aliens and how they theorize that aliens were here centuries ago and influenced mankind.  Personally I don't think so... but say it were true - perhaps they died off from some virus.

I've seen that show while waiting in the driver lounge to get truck repairs completed and some of the episodes are rather over the top.  I do believe that there's life out there, but whether it's the type of only ameobas or the type that could take over our planet is anyone's guess.  

It is kinda fun to imagine that such an advanced civilization could be brought low by our little ol common cold. 😛

[Yeah No]

13 hours ago, Teafortwo said:

So happy for you, Yeah No! Even though it will no doubt be a very emotional time when you do the clean-out, it is fantastic that you found this wonderful realtor. I'm happy to hear about the nice, conscientious client your husband drove, too, and that you're happy with being in CT. I am wishing I lived in a stand-alone home or at least a townhouse, and seriously considering a move. I'd have to sell my apartment first and then find something much less expensive, as I still am unemployed. We lived in CT when I was in Jr. high and high school and although it was very difficult for me as a "city child" (like Eloise hahaha), these days I find myself dreaming of our wooded lot with its beautiful trees and birds. I am not sure where I can find the energy to pack and move, much less make these huge decisions, but seeing you mustering your courage to go and take care of your father's place, I'm hoping will inspire me. I really, really love my apartment but I need to be somewhere that I feel safe walking outside. My neighborhood is safe but as it's gotten so hot people are not wearing masks as much as they were even a couple of weeks ago. Taking a walk on a country or even suburban road would be heaven.

Hahaha, I really "get" that Eloise thing!  I moved into CT slowly.  We started in Norwalk, then Monroe and then Hartford, then here.  It was a huge culture shock just to move to Norwalk.  If I had moved up here right from NYC it would have been even more of a shock.  It's hard to describe for people not from NY how much of a culture shock it is for a native NY-er to move somewhere else.  Anywhere else, LOL.

I know how you must feel - I am just happy where I am on our 1 acre with lots of land and woods around.  We are on a kind of a horseshoe cul-de-sac right up against a nature preserve but off a major road.  It's a road that doesn't have any stores on it so it's not like a busy business district.  We are on the side that faces the condo. development but there are acres of woods between us and them so we only see their lights in the distance in the winter.  The land behind us belongs to the condo. and it's divided by a brook to there won't be anyone building there.  Our neighbors are spaced nicely apart from us too, but close enough not to feel like we're all alone.  No one can see into our windows except on one side and it's covered by trees most of the year and too far away anyway.  Our front yard is so private we can sit out there like it's a back yard. 

I just found out that this town was voted as best town in CT to buy a house.  Second and third on the list are all adjoining towns.  So this is really a wonderful place to live for social distancing but also for the quality of life.  I never forget how lucky I am to live here after some of the places I've been.

I actually think that in spite of the taxes and weather this wouldn't be a bad place to retire.  I think it would potentially feel boring to any recently transplanted NY-er, but after all these years I've really grown to appreciate boring.  All I have to do is turn on the TV news these days and I appreciate it all the more.  But truthfully, it doesn't have to be boring.  There are plenty of things to get involved in up here - It's just a different, slower, quieter way of life.  And you really do have to get used to New Englanders.  They are more reserved than NY-ers.  I've lived in this area for 20 years now so I fit right in.

I hope I do inspire you - I would love for you to find a place to live where you can feel safe and comfortable.  If you didn't want to move too far away I can't recommend Norwalk enough.  I loved living there.  It was the best of both worlds - enough like NY but enough into the 'burbs to be a nice balance of things.  Plus it was much closer to NYC.  We owned a reasonable townhouse just off Rt. 7 near Wilton and I still miss it.  So give it a look, LOL.

[suomi]

Thank you to everyone for my birthday greetings. They lifted my spirits and were much appreciated.

My thanks are delayed because I was without internet for nearly 48 hours. It's back now but still a bit spotty and Xfinity promised a pro-rated refund on the next bill. That was a nice surprise.

Lots of reading to catch up on... 

[suomi]

https://www.washingtonpost.com/photography/2020/07/27/these-imaginary-scenes-depict-womens-struggle-with-domestic-perfection/

I came across this article today and the idea in general and the vivid colors caught my interest right away. She creates scenes and photographs them (and the scenes go on tour, which would be a fun outing). Sometimes the mannequin used in every scene is front and center but sometimes you have to look for her. LOL, Cat Lady. In the book, one poor lady is barely able to edge herself into the over-filled room where she stashes her purchases after Shopping. 😞 My sister likes "picture books" and spends hours poring over them so I ordered the book today for her birthday next month. My one quibble is that I am left wondering if women of color are represented in this book. There are four books in the series but I think the others are out of print. 

I wouldn't say I'm a collector but hoo boy I am an accumulator. From the site that sells the book:

My work is about entangling women and home, leading to the phrase “housewife.” The photographs in “Anonymous Women: Domestic Demise” comment on the mania of collecting, accumulating, and decorating a home, where the objects take over, and the woman is surrounded and/or crushed by her own possessions and obsessions, leading to disaster, mishaps and mayhem. All of the still-life, narrative photographs are re-imagined interior spaces of rooms filled with décor and objects, engulfing a lone figure of a woman, camouflaged with only bits of her visible. She is both a victim of her obsessions, activities and circumstances as well as the invisible creator of such; both satisfying and problematic, pathetic and humorous, silly and serious. The sequence of the book follows her path from glee to gloom, where her domestic activities take a dark turn, until the Anonymous Woman is wedged into the walls of her home.

My influences come from many sources; colorful vintage movies, traditional still-life paintings, decorating magazines, a suburban upbringing, the game of clue, Victorian writing, etc. My intention with the work is to bring attention to unseen heroic women who silently run a home, family, and often careers. The figure symbolizes so many women, no matter what culture or background, with roots in consumer culture and how we use objects to provide continuity and tradition, yet how possessions can substitute for identity. While humor is prevalent in these narratives, the message behind them has darker implications about the role of women in all societies.

Done in by a bag of rice:

https://www.thisiscolossal.com/2020/04/patty-carroll-anonymous-woman/

_ _ _

(Leave the gun, take the cannoli. What movie am I watching?)

[Kohola3]

8 hours ago, suomi said:

She creates scenes and photographs them (and the scenes go on tour, which would be a fun outing).

There are a couple of fruits and veggie vignettes that Janelle might appreciate.

[Rabbit Hutch]

9 hours ago, suomi said:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/photography/2020/07/27/these-imaginary-scenes-depict-womens-struggle-with-domestic-perfection/

I came across this article today and the idea in general and the vivid colors caught my interest right away. She creates scenes and photographs them (and the scenes go on tour, which would be a fun outing). Sometimes the mannequin used in every scene is front and center but sometimes you have to look for her. LOL, Cat Lady. In the book, one poor lady is barely able to edge herself into the over-filled room where she stashes her purchases after Shopping. 😞 My sister likes "picture books" and spends hours poring over them so I ordered the book today for her birthday next month. My one quibble is that I am left wondering if women of color are represented in this book. There are four books in the series but I think the others are out of print. 

I wouldn't say I'm a collector but hoo boy I am an accumulator. From the site that sells the book:

My work is about entangling women and home, leading to the phrase “housewife.” The photographs in “Anonymous Women: Domestic Demise” comment on the mania of collecting, accumulating, and decorating a home, where the objects take over, and the woman is surrounded and/or crushed by her own possessions and obsessions, leading to disaster, mishaps and mayhem. All of the still-life, narrative photographs are re-imagined interior spaces of rooms filled with décor and objects, engulfing a lone figure of a woman, camouflaged with only bits of her visible. She is both a victim of her obsessions, activities and circumstances as well as the invisible creator of such; both satisfying and problematic, pathetic and humorous, silly and serious. The sequence of the book follows her path from glee to gloom, where her domestic activities take a dark turn, until the Anonymous Woman is wedged into the walls of her home.

My influences come from many sources; colorful vintage movies, traditional still-life paintings, decorating magazines, a suburban upbringing, the game of clue, Victorian writing, etc. My intention with the work is to bring attention to unseen heroic women who silently run a home, family, and often careers. The figure symbolizes so many women, no matter what culture or background, with roots in consumer culture and how we use objects to provide continuity and tradition, yet how possessions can substitute for identity. While humor is prevalent in these narratives, the message behind them has darker implications about the role of women in all societies.

Done in by a bag of rice:

https://www.thisiscolossal.com/2020/04/patty-carroll-anonymous-woman/

_ _ _

(Leave the gun, take the cannoli. What movie am I watching?)

Awesome stuff!  Did ya see the article below it, Forgotten Household Objects Cloaked in Needlepoint?  That was a good one, too.

[suomi]

Your mention of loud talking reminded me of this. I waied for curbside outside Lowe's a few days ago for about 20 minutes. It was busy, by my count only saw 4 without masks.

But..  2 of them, big bearded guys, twice said pedophilia loudly while crossing the parking lot. The rest of it was a drone but pedophilia was loud and clear both times. lt was quite obvious, why did these clowns want everyone to hear it? 

I know you can't mask with a beard but how about a bandana, amirite?

WalMart announced a mask policy but won't enforce it because it puts employees at risk. Old Chinese curse: may you live in exciting times.

[suomi]

I blame a lot on the dumbing down of education by school systems and parents not insisting that their kids read. When we went to church or some place where grooming mattered my mom got me ready first and plopped me down with an encyclopedia volume while she got the littles ready. Then we all sat and turned pages while she got ready. 

Over the last hundred years a high school education has steadily lost its exchange rate for way too many kids.

My grandmother was born in 1910 and in her day city high schools offered Greek, Latin, German, Italian and French and math and science (and music) at levels equivalent to a classic education.

My mom was born in 1928 and Greek and Latin were long gone but city high schools offered German, Italian, French and Spanish. Four years of math, science and social studies were required and music (which included music appreciation) was greatly favored.

I was born in 1950 and in my podunk town French and Spanish were the language electives. Only those who played in the band were exposed to music. Core requirements were 4 years of English and math, 2 years of social studies and one year of science and civics. Electives were in vogue but you could choose to take 4 years of any core.

My daughter was born in 1971 and I was floored that she was presented with a menu heavy on electives and what amounted to remedial cores. You could choose 4 years of cores but WTF that 2-3 years of those earned a diploma.

My 1968 diploma is the equivalent of the first 2 years of college. When I watched Jeopardy with my daughter and the grands we had to raise our hand before answering and they would say "Again, with her hand in the air" and it didn't compute when I said "I read a lot and I went to high school." They had attended high school and read a fair amount and they weren't raising their hands. Whassup?

My impressions may not be typical but they illustrate a trend. Although I should confess that at a recent reunion a classmate said "I remember you reading the encyclopedia for fun." The US should not rank as low as it does. FFS we have the internet now! Pffftt. 

Edited July 28, 2020 by suomi
typo

[DakotaJustice]

I read the encyclopedia for fun too!!! Dad bought the bicentennial edition of the Encyclopedia Brittanica and I enjoyed poring thru it. 

 

[suomi]

8 hours ago, Rabbit Hutch said:

Awesome stuff!  Did ya see the article below it, Forgotten Household Objects Cloaked in Needlepoint?  That was a good one, too.

I couldn't find it and couldn't find it and then realized it was at the second link.

Nice catch. Some people are so creative and the rest of us just plod along. I'm pretty sure I need that hammer and the hatchet.

[Angeltoes]

6 hours ago, Rabbit Hutch said:

I love my fellow truckers but sheesh, give the whining and complaining a rest every now and then. 

One of my coworkers has his last day with us on Thursday.  Starting Monday he's going to trucking school.  I don't know what made him want to do it but I'm anxious to see how it goes.

[Meredith Quill]

Community Manager Note:

The forum mod has reminded everyone in at least two instances - one being a topic announcement that is directly above the reply box - that discussing politics is against site rules. There is a link in the topic announcement if you need to familiarize yourself with how that works.

Yet it continues. Numerous posts were removed today for violating this site rule. There are plenty of places on the interwebz you can go to do that if you wish to, however, further instances here will result in punitive moderation measures. 

[Rabbit Hutch]

17 hours ago, suomi said:

I couldn't find it and couldn't find it and then realized it was at the second link.

Nice catch. Some people are so creative and the rest of us just plod along. I'm pretty sure I need that hammer and the hatchet.

Sorry, Suomi, about that.  I didnt realize it was newspaper article links instead of a website but I'm glad you found it.  I'm pretty sure I could use it all!  😁

I dabbled a little in the exploration of symbolism in the modern age in items such photos (40s, 50s, 60s) in grad school and it sure opened my eyes to hidden messages and meanings in newspaper and magazines ads, etc.  Im by far no expert but these are great! On top of these reminding me of those search and seek games I love so much.  😍 

Thanks for sharing, I really enjoyed them.

Edited July 29, 2020 by Rabbit Hutch

[suomi]

File this under Why??? Does the aroma waft from the bulging chicken thigh on top? Just, no.

Crocs and KFC collaborated to create a shoe that smells like fried chicken. Here’s what we know.

https://www.deseret.com/entertainment/2020/7/29/21345841/kfc-crocs-classic-clog-jibbitz-fried-chicken

Edited July 29, 2020 by suomi

[Yeah No]

Well, hubbie and I went down to my father's apartment in the Bronx today.  A 2 hour drive each way, only the way back was more like 2.5 hours because of road construction.  I am completely exhausted and wrung out.  I didn't feel unsafe until the realtor showed up with a contractor.  We were all wearing masks but I was hot and sweaty and not comfortable with being there with them like that.  They were in and out in only minutes, which is good.  I am going to get estimates on renovation from the contractor.  I am not really looking to spend that much on renovation and I'm not sure it will really mean I'd make that much more money.  So I admit I'm skeptical about that.  The realtor says we will talk about the best course of action after we see the estimates.  I did feel good about what I accomplished there today, though.  I went through an entire side of the living room, which was no small task since it involved going through my father's extensive record, tape and CD collection.  I did find some keepers and we filled up a small shopping cart of stuff to take with us.  I think the next time we go we will be able to finish up the entire rest of the apartment since I've been through much of it already.  I put labels on a lot of things to indicate that they're "OK to remove".

Now on top of everything else, my best friend in NYC, who I've known for 46 years has been in the hospital for days now - I only just found out when she called me today.  She had been complaining of neck pain when it got worse and she went to the emergency room - the same one my father went to when he had Covid.  They still don't know what is wrong with her but she says her test numbers are supposedly "way off".  She was not more specific than that.  They think she may have an infection but of course they always worry that it might be cancer, so they are doing a biopsy too.  I wish I knew more and I worry that she may be keeping stuff from me too.  Anyway, any prayers or good wishes for her would be most appreciated.

[Yeah No]

On 7/27/2020 at 11:46 PM, suomi said:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/photography/2020/07/27/these-imaginary-scenes-depict-womens-struggle-with-domestic-perfection/

I came across this article today and the idea in general and the vivid colors caught my interest right away. She creates scenes and photographs them (and the scenes go on tour, which would be a fun outing). Sometimes the mannequin used in every scene is front and center but sometimes you have to look for her. LOL, Cat Lady. In the book, one poor lady is barely able to edge herself into the over-filled room where she stashes her purchases after Shopping. 😞 My sister likes "picture books" and spends hours poring over them so I ordered the book today for her birthday next month. My one quibble is that I am left wondering if women of color are represented in this book. There are four books in the series but I think the others are out of print. 

I wouldn't say I'm a collector but hoo boy I am an accumulator. From the site that sells the book:

My work is about entangling women and home, leading to the phrase “housewife.” The photographs in “Anonymous Women: Domestic Demise” comment on the mania of collecting, accumulating, and decorating a home, where the objects take over, and the woman is surrounded and/or crushed by her own possessions and obsessions, leading to disaster, mishaps and mayhem. All of the still-life, narrative photographs are re-imagined interior spaces of rooms filled with décor and objects, engulfing a lone figure of a woman, camouflaged with only bits of her visible. She is both a victim of her obsessions, activities and circumstances as well as the invisible creator of such; both satisfying and problematic, pathetic and humorous, silly and serious. The sequence of the book follows her path from glee to gloom, where her domestic activities take a dark turn, until the Anonymous Woman is wedged into the walls of her home.

My influences come from many sources; colorful vintage movies, traditional still-life paintings, decorating magazines, a suburban upbringing, the game of clue, Victorian writing, etc. My intention with the work is to bring attention to unseen heroic women who silently run a home, family, and often careers. The figure symbolizes so many women, no matter what culture or background, with roots in consumer culture and how we use objects to provide continuity and tradition, yet how possessions can substitute for identity. While humor is prevalent in these narratives, the message behind them has darker implications about the role of women in all societies.

Done in by a bag of rice:

https://www.thisiscolossal.com/2020/04/patty-carroll-anonymous-woman/

_ _ _

(Leave the gun, take the cannoli. What movie am I watching?)

I am reprinting my response to this here for anyone that may not have seen it:

I really loved that and I can't even express why.  I also liked the article under it with a photo essay by a woman in NYC called "My New Normal" during the covid-19 pandemic.  I liked it so much I sent it to my best friend in the Bronx.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/photography/2020/07/08/my-new-normal-an-emotional-psychological-journey-through-covid-19-pandemic-new-york-city/

What movie you're watching:  The Godfather, of course.  Did I ever tell you that my grandmother was an extra in The Godfather II and appears on screen during the theater scene?  She invited my parents and I to hang out with her one day during filming but I was in school and had a very important TEST that day that I couldn't miss.  Ugh.  Of course that was her last day there.  Looking back on it, I should have skipped the test.  But at least my grandma was immortalized on the silver screen.  I don't even think she knew she was in it - I don't think she ever saw the movie, if you would believe that.  I had only seen it on TV and with the smaller screens it wasn't easy to catch.  I didn't notice her until 2010 when I got a 40" flat panel TV and her image was large enough for me to see it.  I wasn't even watching the movie - It just happened to be on and I was sleeping on the couch.  I woke up to that scene and there she was - I almost couldn't believe it.

My grandmother is behind Genco (the man on the left).  You can see her in second 41-45 and again at 1:17 then again at 1:29, where she rubs her eyes in that way I remember my grandma rubbing her eyes, LOL, and then again at 2:39, and an even better shot at 2:50.  Apologies for the foreign subtitles as this is the only clip of this scene I could find.

 

[Kyanight]

.

Edited August 3, 2020 by Kyanight

[Rabbit Hutch]

14 hours ago, suomi said:

File this under Why??? Does the aroma waft from the bulging chicken thigh on top? Just, no.

Crocs and KFC collaborated to create a shoe that smells like fried chicken. Here’s what we know.

https://www.deseret.com/entertainment/2020/7/29/21345841/kfc-crocs-classic-clog-jibbitz-fried-chicken

Good grief! 🤐

[Yeah No]

11 hours ago, Kyanight said:

It must be miserable having to have wisdom teeth removed.  My heart goes out to all of you who have been through this!

Thank you, although that feels like a walk in the park compared to what I'm going through right now.

[suomi]

32 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

Thank you, although that feels like a walk in the park compared to what I'm going through right now.

Small piece of advice, hang onto as much of your dad's vinyl as you practically can. I realize that stacks of albums take up room and require temperature control - but there is a niche market for them that perhaps you could glide into later on at your leisure.

Vinyl has made a huge comeback and some of the youngs and news prefer vintage, the real deal, rather than new and pristine. Much of that is fueled by an appreciation for the liner notes (sadly MIA today) and the art or photos on the covers.

I realize that I'm prejudiced because I grew up in family music stores - but perhaps it is something you could consider. Music is a time machine and album covers even more so. 

Of all the items offered when we were downsizing my dad for assisted living, his vinyl drew the most interest and he hated turning loose of it - until he counted his take.

[Yeah No]

1 minute ago, suomi said:

Small piece of advice, hang onto as much of your dad's vinyl as you practically can. I realize that stacks of albums take up room and require temperature control - but there is a niche market for them that perhaps you could glide into later on at your leisure.

Vinyl has made a huge comeback and some of the youngs and news prefer vintage, the real deal, rather than new and pristine. Much of that is fueled by an appreciation for the liner notes (sadly MIA today) and the art or photos on the covers.

I realize that I'm prejudiced because I grew up in family music stores - but perhaps it is something you could consider. Music is a time machine and album covers even more so. 

Of all the items offered when we were downsizing my dad for assisted living, his vinyl drew the most interest and he hated turning loose of it - until he counted his take.

My husband is a collector of vinyl so he has an eye for what might be worth something.  Most of the stuff that was left (I took a lot about 10 years ago) was classical stuff that doesn't have big demand right now, but we did take everything we saw on the "Nonesuch" label because anything on that now defunct label is sought after.  We also took some stuff that looked rare and interesting, like the advance promotional copy of Julio Iglesias' "Feelings" that I remember my Dad got from the son of a coworker who sold records.  We left yesterday with a big stack of records!  

[suomi]

This has been the hottest June and July in memory and we have been without air conditioning. The house is fine until late afternoon but is like an oven for 5 or 6 hours after that. I've had to wait later and later to open the windows, tonight it wasn't until 9:00 when 86 outside felt like a reprieve indoors. It had to be close to 95 in here. We have pedestal fans and personal coolers that use ice water but they were losing the battle.

It got to where the cat took to sitting in front of the fan, staring at it as if she could will it to start and when I hit it with the remote she was fairly certain of her powers of concentration. 

But... AC is being installed tomorrow! I called on Monday for an estimate, he showed on Wednesday and quoted a good price and will be here at 8am tomorrow. He's very busy but had a hole in his schedule because the deliveries he's waiting on for others who want higher SEERs are greatly delayed. Something like that for me would have pushed it out to August 10 and the high is forecast at 99 for the next week so I said I will make do with a 13 SEER and expect you on Friday morning!

He will tie into the furnace and use that ductwork. So yeah, inquiring on Monday and getting on Friday is very, very satisfactory. I'm gonna Yelp him one fine review to go with all the others he has. 

[Kyanight]

.

 

Edited August 3, 2020 by Kyanight

[Yeah No]

1 hour ago, suomi said:

This has been the hottest June and July in memory and we have been without air conditioning. The house is fine until late afternoon but is like an oven for 5 or 6 hours after that. I've had to wait later and later to open the windows, tonight it wasn't until 9:00 when 86 outside felt like a reprieve indoors. It had to be close to 95 in here. We have pedestal fans and personal coolers that use ice water but they were losing the battle.

It got to where the cat took to sitting in front of the fan, staring at it as if she could will it to start and when I hit it with the remote she was fairly certain of her powers of concentration. 

But... AC is being installed tomorrow! I called on Monday for an estimate, he showed on Wednesday and quoted a good price and will be here at 8am tomorrow. He's very busy but had a hole in his schedule because the deliveries he's waiting on for others who want higher SEERs are greatly delayed. Something like that for me would have pushed it out to August 10 and the high is forecast at 99 for the next week so I said I will make do with a 13 SEER and expect you on Friday morning!

He will tie into the furnace and use that ductwork. So yeah, inquiring on Monday and getting on Friday is very, very satisfactory. I'm gonna Yelp him one fine review to go with all the others he has. 

As someone who just went almost a week without AC in the 95 degree heat and humidity, I feel your pain.  We had to get a completely new unit plus air handler.  The existing ductwork didn't need any work.  Around here that stuff is frightfully expensive, and you do get what you pay for.  The company we used was very highly recommended and they did a fantastic job.  So we had to take it out on credit.  Thankfully we had paid off the new furnace this March so it won't feel quite so bad even though both of us aren't working.  The new AC is glorious, though, even better and quieter than the old one.  I no longer break out in a sweat blow drying my hair.  You're going to feel so much better!

In other news, my best friend in the Bronx had laparoscopic surgery today to remove the unidentified mass on her neck.  They are going to biopsy it.  I am very worried about her.  I have had no news yet and I'm on pins and needles.  Of course I fear the worst.  I just lost my father, if I lost my closest and longest female friend who has been like a sister to me it would be devastating.  I really need to be more optimistic, but lately the hits just keep on coming.

[suomi]

I am so sorry to hear about your good, good friend - I suspected as much the other day when you related what she said. Sometimes biopsy results take so long that the wait nearly sends you around the bend, let alone the rest of the mental gymnastics that are involved. Everyone here is hoping for the best along with you. Has this been the worst year of your life, or what?

Glad to hear you got a replacement system you're happy with. The bright side about certain large expenditures at our age is "It's the last one I'll ever need to buy."

The thing I detested about SoCal was the humidity in the summer. When I was a teen I tossed many a hairbrush and cussed many blue streaks while drying and styling my fine, limp hair which was rarely much longer than chin length. Clean and sweaty hair never ratted well and I needed height, dammit, and the Aqua Net could only do so much. One time I snapped a comb in half with my bare claws. Humid heat turns me into a beast! "So. I took a shower and put on fresh clothing and deodorant and perfume and makeup so I could sweat myself senseless and end up looking like I MELTED?! And WTF is up with my HAIR?! I am not leaving this house." Cue ringing doorbell... calling out to friends "I am not going ANYwhere!" Opening the door and seeing their long, straight, perfect waist-length hair... 

[Meowwww]

Well, today was a doozy, angry woman screamed at me About her mask and told me “SHUT IT LADY.”  
She and her daughter came into our shop, rude from the beginning.  She was talking on the phone and mad that we wanted to greet her dog (greeting people’s dogs are the best part of my job!) She’s about my age, 50, daughters in her late 20s  

They get up to the register, my coworker asks them to please put their masks on. Daughter rolls her eyes but complies.  Mom starts to get in a tizzy.  She pulls her mask up, over her mouth but not her nose. We mentioned the mask mandate and how masks must be worn., completely covering nose and mouth.  Woman flies off the handle.  Daughter says her moms mask strings are too loose etc.  Mom pulls up her mask over her nose and says to me “see, stupid? It’s over my nose” and lets it fall down again.  I have had it by this time.   Mom went on a tirade of swears that if she had a medical condition we’d have no choice (yes we do, if one can’t wear a mask we will happily provide curbside shopping and bring their purchase to their car, but they can’t come in).  Mom by this time is apoplectic.  
I did lose my professionalism just then for one second and just said “wow.”  Then my coworker (a big dude) says he’s got this, and I went to the back while he rang them up. Called my stores owner ASAP to give her the story.  
I mean....how does someone be such a rude creature over a rule that’s not my rule, but the state’s law?   Ugh.  

Edited August 1, 2020 by Meowwww

[Kohola3]

21 minutes ago, Meowwww said:

I mean....how does someone be such a rude creature over a rule that’s not my rule, but the state’s law?  

It is a mystery and more so every single day.  There is a move to impeach the governor of MI because she had the audacity to save thousands of lives.  How DARE she?

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

1 hour ago, Meowwww said:

Well, today was a doozy, angry woman screamed at me About her mask and told me “SHUT IT LADY.”  
She and her daughter came into our shop, rude from the beginning.  She was talking on the phone and mad that we wanted to greet her dog (greeting people’s dogs are the best part of my job!) She’s about my age, 50, daughters in her late 20s  

They get up to the register, my coworker asks them to please put their masks on. Daughter rolls her eyes but complies.  Mom starts to get in a tizzy.  She pulls her mask up, over her mouth but not her nose. We mentioned the mask mandate and how masks must be worn., completely covering nose and mouth.  Woman flies off the handle.  Daughter says her moms mask strings are too loose etc.  Mom pulls up her mask over her nose and says to me “see, stupid? It’s over my nose” and lets it fall down again.  I have had it by this time.   Mom went on a tirade of swears that if she had a medical condition we’d have no choice (yes we do, if one can’t wear a mask we will happily provide curbside shopping and bring their purchase to their car, but they can’t come in).  Mom by this time is apoplectic.  
I did lose my professionalism just then for one second and just said “wow.”  Then my coworker (a big dude) says he’s got this, and I went to the back while he rang them up. Called my stores owner ASAP to give her the story.  
I mean....how does someone be such a rude creature over a rule that’s not my rule, but the state’s law?   Ugh.  

I am sorry you have to deal with that BS. I went on my weekly run to the grocery store and standing in line- 6 feet and arrows pointing every which way, I get the douchebag of all douchebags. I have had him ring me up before but today, man he was an ass - normally the checkers are pleasant - this dude - never once said hello -which is not the norm at this store- never spoke a word or anything. Next time I go in, I WILL get his name and call and complain. I am without a job, and if this fucktard is so miserable, I will be happy to take his place  

[Yeah No]

22 hours ago, suomi said:

I am so sorry to hear about your good, good friend - I suspected as much the other day when you related what she said. Sometimes biopsy results take so long that the wait nearly sends you around the bend, let alone the rest of the mental gymnastics that are involved. Everyone here is hoping for the best along with you. Has this been the worst year of your life, or what?

Glad to hear you got a replacement system you're happy with. The bright side about certain large expenditures at our age is "It's the last one I'll ever need to buy."

The thing I detested about SoCal was the humidity in the summer. When I was a teen I tossed many a hairbrush and cussed many blue streaks while drying and styling my fine, limp hair which was rarely much longer than chin length. Clean and sweaty hair never ratted well and I needed height, dammit, and the Aqua Net could only do so much. One time I snapped a comb in half with my bare claws. Humid heat turns me into a beast! "So. I took a shower and put on fresh clothing and deodorant and perfume and makeup so I could sweat myself senseless and end up looking like I MELTED?! And WTF is up with my HAIR?! I am not leaving this house." Cue ringing doorbell... calling out to friends "I am not going ANYwhere!" Opening the door and seeing their long, straight, perfect waist-length hair... 

My hair comes out so smooth and dries so quickly with the new AC, it's amazing.  And I don't have to crank it up either or feel sweaty while blow drying.  Given that we're told the average life expectancy of an AC unit is 16 years, I hope I live longer than that.  But I don't know if I'll be living here if I make it to that age, which would be 77.  I would hope to be somewhere that would require less expense and upkeep.

I didn't hear from my friend today.  I left her a voicemail in the afternoon, but haven't heard back.  Unfortunately she doesn't really have any close relatives nearby that I know and could contact.   I know of one friend - the one that drove her to the hospital, but the only contact info. I have on her was through a zoom meeting we had on our mutual friend's birthday.  So I could probably track her down.  She is not someone I know very well.  I don't even know her last name.

Of course I am still worried.  I will call the hospital tomorrow afternoon if I don't hear from her before then.

You know, when you asked me if this wasn't the worst year of my life I had to think about that.  I think the year I lost my mother was just as bad in its own way because only 2 months later we had September 11th, which hit me hard because I knew people who died and got hurt.  And that wasn't the only thing, I had just come out of the only clinical depression I ever experienced.  We had just moved to this area and that was also a big stress producer.  Hubbie had just lost his own mom only months before mine died.  Then my father lost 2 of his best friends in addition to my mom.  2001 was a real s__t-fest of a year.

Thanks for your good wishes - they mean more than you know!