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"The Daily Show": Week of 5/4/15


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5/4: Brian Grazer (producer & author – promoting book “A Curious Mind: The Secret to a Bigger Life”)
5/5: Willie Nelson (musician & author – promoting book “It's a Long Story: My Life”)
5/6: Secretary Ernest Moniz (Secretary of Energy)
5/7: Mumford & Sons (band – promoting album “Wilder Mind”)

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(edited)

I'm sad that John Oliver isn't on the show anymore much less hosting for the birth of the royal baby.  He knocked it out of the park last time, and I would have loved to seen some more footage of the horse at that pub.

Edited by Jediknight
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I'm sad that John Oliver isn't on the show anymore much less hosting for the birth of the royal baby.  He knocked it out of the park last time, and I would have loved to seen some more footage of the horse at that pub.

        It just seems following the aftermath of Jonny-bun's departure they've been more direct on covering serial topics, the presidential campaigns, Baltimore, the media screwing up the coverage. I think it will be out of the norm if they show interest the royal baby, the Nepal earthquake tragedy, Bruce Jenner, or more recently, Mayweather's money beating Pacquiao without context provided by someone of association. They already lost their correspondents who can carry more international/pop culture topics, and it seems too early for the remaining correspondents to fill the empty gaps. So much for the Best F@*Kin News Team continuing that legacy (though I still luv Jessica Williams; 'Snowshake' Klepper and Hasan are eye-candy in my eyes). 

 

        Now for guests, maybe it's just my interests clashing, but I'm not very thrilled nor am I getting shock value for this week's guests; but then again, we've already had that with Judith Miller (and her devilish smile, -_-), and Kristin Wiig pleasantly cleansed the week after that hell of an interview. Who knows if these guests surprise me? I'm just more concerned about the state of the show...

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To simplify tonight's first segment: No fear-mongering, Texas!!! No shooting people even though they provoke you with words or cartoons!!! (Brghghm-Je Suis Charlie)

 

Nice to see Al Madrigal back to fill the void after Sam's departure. I didn't even know that the correspondents had an exclusive area beneath Jon's desk, tee-hee. Also, I thought Jordan's cocaine nose was a last-minute improvisation; just hearing him yelling he's "MISSSIN OUT ON THE PIZZA" after he took a snort of cocaine (probably just leftover pizza dough flour) sounded out of place. I don't take drugs, but I'm pretty u got no right to complain there's no pizza when you could've used your cocaine money to buy a pie. 

 

Luv the final quote of the first segment, too. Does that mean Rick Perry is considered a friend (or acquaintance) of TDS? (Probably not)

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Yes, you shouldn't be shooting people just because they do something you disagree with, like drawing pictures of Mohammed. But I can't help but think that the organizers of that event planned it as one big troll act. All that was needed was a sign saying "You Mad Bro?" And I'd have to think that Rick Perry would agree with what his successor Gregg Abbot was thinking about. He is dumb enough to think that things are different with the "scary dark radical Islamic socialist Nazi Harvard professor" living in the White House "illegally".

 

Never look at people eating pizza on an empty stomach.

 

Those anti gay protesters Jessica interviewed are just one level removed from those creeps at the Westboro Baptist Church. And just as awful as them. I do hope they go away if and when SCOTUS rules gay marriage as legal.

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Those anti gay protesters Jessica interviewed are just one level removed from those creeps at the Westboro Baptist Church. And just as awful as them. I do hope they go away if and when SCOTUS rules gay marriage as legal.

 

I wouldn't count on that; we're 40+ years past Roe v. Wade, and anti-abortion protestors haven't gone anywhere (in fact, they've worsened). 

Edited by Bastet
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The Jade Helm 15 story is all I can ever want in a 'scandal.' There's so much stupidity, so much craven sucking up to the crazy, that I just marvel. I mean, yesterday, we got denials from both the Pentagon and Walmart (their shuttered TX properties are being used for staging sites and detention facilities, apparently) (!!!!!). There are rumors of tunneling (which no Texan has apparently been hired to do, yet is still being magically done) in order to move troops/detainees unseen from TX to Utah.  (!!!!) And lastly, hackers are being forced --forced!!! -- to hack into banks in order to precipitate a false-flag economic collapse so the Muslim Usurper can take all the guns!  Town halls are filled to overflow with angry people unwilling to believe the denials! 

 

So much love. Ranks right up there with Florida, threatening to overtake.

 

I loved Jessica's piece. Her mocking condescension was just what the doctor ordered. (I noticed a couple of those nimrods alluded to her being a lesbian. Was that just their idea of vitriol, or does Jay Dubs play for the rainbow team?)

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I loved Jessica's piece. Her mocking condescension was just what the doctor ordered. (I noticed a couple of those nimrods alluded to her being a lesbian. Was that just their idea of vitriol, or does Jay Dubs play for the rainbow team?)

I haven't heard anything about Jessica being a lesbian, but I assume that's their idea of vitriol. I mean if they hate gay marriage that much, calling a man gay and a woman lesbian must be the height of their vitriol at the time (they seemed smart enough not to go the racist route). I could see them calling whatever guy doing the field piece gay as well.

 

The Jade Helm 15 conspiracy theories were fun to read when I heard about them initially. But it's suddenly less fun now that the Governor of Texas has decided to take them seriously. Congratulations Alex Jones, you won.

 

The no shooting bit seemed to be a direct ripoff of last weeks Amy Schumer no raping bit.

 

Aside from emphatically saying not to do something horrible under any condition, it didn't really to me? The Amy Schumer bit was more a play on Friday Night Lights (I loved the wine glasses getting bigger and bigger) with the don't rape message, while Jon was just being Jon with his crazy cast of correspondence.

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I loved Jessica's piece. Her mocking condescension was just what the doctor ordered. (I noticed a couple of those nimrods alluded to her being a lesbian. Was that just their idea of vitriol, or does Jay Dubs play for the rainbow team?)

 

No clue as to her orientation, but I'm pretty sure they didn't know either and it was just that a young woman who obviously wasn't buying their bullcrap with that hairstyle MUST be a lesbian. The same way I've seen internet comments on one of Samantha Bee's feminist pieces calling her a dyke.

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Calling someone gay as an insult is hilariously simpleton. Even kids don't do that anymore. That's the best you got? I thought the guy who took all that time for a pic of two guys kissing was funny. Really? What horrible people. And you know even when scotus rules in favor of marriage equality, these people are still going to be out protesting.  

 

The cartoon was a massive troll to be sure, but you know what? Too bad. And now you're dead. How'd that work out? Most of these people of any religion are just violent people looking for an excuse. This one happened to be an easy excuse, but still. They would have done something else. 

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The cartoon was a massive troll to be sure, but you know what? Too bad. And now you're dead. How'd that work out? Most of these people of any religion are just violent people looking for an excuse. This one happened to be an easy excuse, but still. They would have done something else.

 

"Mission Accomplished" for Pam Geller.

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Oh man, Jessica's piece: glorius~

 

I'm not gonna call out Reuben Israel for assuming Jessica was a lesbian (even though that was very mean), but I feel like his anger and ideologies were lost in the moment. Loved the way Jessica stayed in character despite his comments.

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I thought Jessica was enormously brave to venture into that scary crowd. I was actually worried for her, that looked dangerous. Those people are as crazy as the gunmen who shot up the cartoon convention.

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That's really true. These are hateful people spoiling for a fight and just using their respective religions as an excuse. They all want a war on something.

I wonder how many people at that demonstration were repressed gays.

I assume with the camera and sound crew, TDS would hire a body guard too.

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Yeah, I hope there was security there, too. I'm glad she got the piece done, unscathed.

Most of the lesbians I know are smart, funny and really cool. I would have taken it as a compliment, regardless of how the evil POS meant it.

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There's a meme going around that says "Ted Cruz is an Idiot!" Jon proved that meme to be true tonight. As well as Carly Fiorina, Mike Huckabee, Ben Car... oh fuck, EVERYONE SEATED IN THE GOP CLOWN CAR!

 

Willie Nelson's one of the good ones from Texas.

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You could tell CF was just sitting on the "would you ask a man that?" and just couldn't hold back. Couric looked genuinely wtf? about it too. I don't understand how it was a gender based question. 

 

I know politicians tend to talk out of both sides of their mouth, but Cruz takes the cake. It's too bad the media doesn't hold these people a little more accountable. 

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You could tell CF was just sitting on the "would you ask a man that?" and just couldn't hold back. Couric looked genuinely wtf? about it too. I don't understand how it was a gender based question. 

Very well put. The question was barely out of Katie's mouth when CF spewed that ridiculous accusation/question. I'm sure Katie would have gotten around to a question that could/would only have been asked of a woman, but she just had to get it out then and there. You could tell she was all "Oooh, who's on the end of a 'gotcha' question NOW, hmmmm?" with her cool and pointed delivery. Yeah, good one, Carly.

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The real question is really, "You're polling at 1%. No one thinks you're a legit candidate and you don't either. So what's your goal?"

 

I don't have the link, but I read a good article that running for president for some people is about promoting their brand. You basically get free advertising for yourself and when it's over, speaking engagements, maybe a show, etc. That's fine. But call it what it is, and don't snap at the reporter for asking a legit question. The media barely holds these people accountable as it is. 

Edited by ganesh
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No, they don't, which is exactly why I'm going to miss Jon Stewart. That piece where he showed Ted Cruz saying one thing in one clip, then showed him saying something completely and outrageously hypocritical in the next clip, is the only source we have on TV of people holding these politicians accountable. Literally, I know of no other news program (real or parody) that would have done that with the Cruz clips. Everyone else just lets him get away with saying whatever crap he wants. I want someone to get him on their show and show him both those clips and demand he explain how he's not a huge hypocrite. Never gonna happen.

 

How old is Willy Nelson? Jeepers if nothing else he's proven marijuana does nothing to shorten your lifespan. Or creativity. Or success.

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Where am I going to get my daily fix of the 2016 republican clown show?

The whole Ted Cruz mess is enough for me to long for Jon to at least to have a blog to keep me happy.

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"They're the Patriots of corruption...just like the Patriots." What a great line.  IIRC, didn't Jon make fun of Moniz's hair a bit ago?

 

I didn't know much about the Iran deal, so it was a great interview for me.

 

I guess they don't care since Jon's leaving, but the site really needs to stream into the extended interview instead of the cut down one. Plus, even clicking on the extended interview from the segment with Al Madrigal won't lead me to the extended interview, it'll automatically send me to the cut down one no matter what. Come on Comedy Central.

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Ahh, you know that story selection thing is rigged. Otherwise, everybody would choose Jon to eat an Arby's value meal. I know I would have >:D. And what would have been better was if they had dubbed Megyn Kelley's voice with someone doing a bad Harvey Fierstein impression.

 

Jon not wanting to judge Tom Brady over Deflategate if he were a New York Giant shows his true feelings about this. His hatred of all things Boston sports is well documented. Perhaps he and Denis Leary can have a nice chat about it in August.

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I would have loved if Jon during the Brady piece said "True greats like Jerry Rice", and it went to a clip of him admitting he used Stick-Em, then he would try to mention the Steelers of the 70's followed by a clip of their steroid allegations, mention the Seahawks who won the Super Bowl the season before last and lost the Super Bowl, only to be followed by a clip showing how many of their players have been nailed for PEDs.  He finally goes, "Fine what about great current QBs, like Aaron Rodgers?" and that's followed by Rodgers admitting he wants balls overinflated.  He gets pissed and asks "If everyone's cheating, why do we care about the Pats cheating?"

 

I'm a Niners fan, and I don't care.  Everyone cheats a little, everyone knows it, and it's not a problem till someone pitches a fit.

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It's one thing to cheat and admit to it.  It's another like Tom Brady and the Patriots to cheat and then lie about it.   And it's not like that organization hasn't had a history of cheating in the past.

 

With the Clinton Foundation -- it's a worldwide venture, isn't it?  That it does various projects around the world, right?   So why wouldn't there be donations from people from around the world to help fund it?  

 

And I loved the voice over on that smarmy Megyn Kelly question too.  "What special faaaaaavors must she do...?"  Yeah, nothing implied there at all. 

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So was segment one running incredibly short that they decided to just go "fuck it" and make it into the choose your adventure thing? That's what it looks like.

 

Oh Gronk, still as eloquent as you were  when we were kids.

 

Did Mumford and Son change their sound for the new album? Seems more rock than folk rock based on the two songs they performed from it. Never seen them perform before, they're adorable.

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And what would have been better was if they had dubbed Megyn Kelley's voice with someone doing a bad Harvey Fierstein impression.

 

Is she the blonde woman? She's always so smarmy. I always wonder if it's her or the director tells her to do that.

 

I'm a Niners fan, and I don't care.  Everyone cheats a little, everyone knows it, and it's not a problem till someone pitches a fit.

 

Seriously. No one is mad about the Pats cheating. They're mad because they were so egregious about it. The Pats make it much more difficult for everyone else now. The funny thing is, no one is saying that this was how they beat the Colts. 

 

The greats don't cheat? That's patently absurd and completely false. 

 

Why does JS even care? The Pats never have been able to beat the Giants.

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So which do you prefer? Countries donating money to a charitable foundation to help others around the world, or billionaires bankrolling a presidential candidate in order to get laws signed that benefit those billionaires' interests?

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Did Mumford and Son change their sound for the new album?

 

Yes. Apparently it's upsetting some fans of their earlier work. Because artists should be just like a meal at any Arby's around the world: the same all the time. Amirite?

 

In related news, I find the forearms of guitar players so, so, so very attractive.

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This is the accountability problem again. They're just throwing out unsubstantiated rumors. What access did Clinton grant to anyone as State?

 

I don't get why the woman was like, "They want to limit free speech." There's already plenty of limits to free speech. 

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So which do you prefer? Countries donating money to a charitable foundation to help others around the world, or billionaires bankrolling a presidential candidate in order to get laws signed that benefit those billionaires' interests?

 

Yeah. If - no strike that -  when Hillary is confronted with this I hope she just spells out exactly who paid what and where the money went and how that money helped feed starving children or saved the ozone. Then turn around and ask where exactly people expect the Koch brothers' money to go. Certainly not to save the environment or provide health care to impoverished nations.

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Seriously, it's ridiculous. With SuperPacs and Koch funding, the transparency possible from the Clinton Foundation should (in a sane world) come out HELPING her campaign. I would much rather elect someone with a track record devoting energy to equality for women around the world, and stopping children from dying of diarrhea, and who has working relationships with and is backed by other people who support such causes, than I'd like to elect someone who is funded by who-knows-where, or a handful of billionaire corporate wealthy, and has only ever been known to fluff their own personal finances and political ambitions.

 

I think a lot of meetings would go better if at least one person was naked in the tub and another sitting on the toilet. I'm not sure I'd want to be in the meeting myself, but I think it would be a good exercise for a lot of the groups I've had to sit through endless hours of stupidity with, and would at least cause people to stay on topic and drop some of the bureaucratic artifice.

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That's been the problem with Clinton though. They kind of wave everything off because it's so ridiculous and people are all pointing at them like they did something wrong. 

 

It's not her foundation anyway. Subpoena Bill and demand he turn over all the records so they can find where all the bribes are. But they won't because they're aren't so just add some innuendo. It's incredibly disingenuous and straight up bullying.

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(edited)

Okay, I'll tie them together.  The Clintons are like the Patriots in that both teams are good enough not to have to cheat and yet they can't resist creeping right up to the line between right and wrong and doing the tango.

Edited by Qoass
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Yeah. If - no strike that -  when Hillary is confronted with this I hope she just spells out exactly who paid what and where the money went and how that money helped feed starving children or saved the ozone. Then turn around and ask where exactly people expect the Koch brothers' money to go. Certainly not to save the environment or provide health care to impoverished nations.

 

Seriously.  Can she please please please actually confront the issue and ask this question?  I'm so tired of the excuse, deflect and ignore strategy the dems usually do. Sometimes you have to play on their field, because if you don't they will just continue to beat you up.  Come out and say it.   "If you really think that the money my husband's foundation gets in donations, which charity is used to help poor people around the world, is somehow going to grant special influence with me in politics, then don't you also think that the billionaire directly funding Mr. Republican's campaign is going to grant special influence with him?"

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(edited)

Bill was great at spinning info, and confronting his critics. I don't know why Hillary is so bad at it. It's not like she hasn't seen it done. And she should have access to the same advisers he did, if she wants it. But she is just waaaaaay less socially smooth than he is. She's not a great communicator and she doesn't come off warm and likable like he does. There is definitely sexism in how people react to her, but it's not only that. She always looks like she's holding her nose in disgust, or looking down it, and she never ever comes off natural or at ease. For a long time, I've thought in any election, the candidate who seems the most "friendly" is the one the public elects. It almost doesn't matter what your policies are, it matters if the general public likes you. It's just like how in high school there was a split between "most popular" and "smartest."  People could generally tag you as a genius and it wouldn't matter. No one says Hillary is stupid. They just don't like her. But it's hard to defend her on policy grounds when she refuses to do so herself. It's a bizarre approach and I don't understand why she's chosen to conduct her public life this way. It doesn't make any sense. He would lie, people knew he was lying, and they would vote for him anyway. She has none of that kind of energy on her side, so she really needs to work on her ability to make a case.

Edited by possibilities
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The Clintons are like the Patriots in that both teams are good enough not to have to cheat and yet they can't resist creeping right up to the line between right and wrong and doing the tango.

 

When has Hilary actually cheated in her political career though?

 

"If you really think that the money my husband's foundation gets in donations, which charity is used to help poor people around the world, is somehow going to grant special influence with me in politics, then don't you also think that the billionaire directly funding Mr. Republican's campaign is going to grant special influence with him?"

 

This is 100% correct, but I think it's just as bad for her to say that. She's in a total lose-lose situation. If she says that, then she's deflecting. If she gets ticked, then she gets slammed for being 'emotional', if she ignores it, then she's hiding something. Granted, she's not doing herself many favors with her current approach, but there's never going to any response where people are going to be like, "ok, let's move on." 

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That's the point. What are they supposed to do, as I said above. Just because it doesn't look good doesn't mean anything was illegal. What doesn't look good even? Bill Clinton has a foundation where rich people support infrastructure projects in problem areas in the world. What special access have these people got? Just throwing out rumors isn't fair. 

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