Small Talk: Viewers Like You

[Tunia]

GHScorpiosRule,

Just wanted to tell you how much I admire that - no matter what - you keep trucking onward.  What stamina you must have!  It seems like no sooner are you home from surgery that you're back at work, giving it your all.  Plus, no matter how many "rounds" you go through, you pick yourself up and are ready to fight again.  Bless you.

May all your news be good from here on (and may all your lumps liquidate)!

[Tammee]

6 hours ago, Tunia said:

GHScorpiosRule,

Just wanted to tell you how much I admire that - no matter what - you keep trucking onward.  What stamina you must have!  It seems like no sooner are you home from surgery that you're back at work, giving it your all.  Plus, no matter how many "rounds" you go through, you pick yourself up and are ready to fight again.  Bless you.

May all your news be good from here on (and may all your lumps liquidate)!

Ditto this and add one Happy Birthday to @Haleth

[GHScorpiosRule]

Welll, the “knot” is scar tissue, so that won’t go away. And upon appointment, it feels smaller, and it’s not as if it’s visible. 

The “lump” however, is actually a bulge due to a hernia. That’s because of the muscle she had to cut through when doing the reconstruction. It hasn’t grown, but I will monitor it. If it becomes bigger, she’ll put a mesh in. It’s not painful but just looks...wonky when I’m looking down at my tummy while standing.

The hardened fat isn’t something to worry about. And if she has to go in to remove it the. I’ll have one lopsided boobie. I can live with the imperfections because hey! I’m alive and in remission.

[Medicine Crow]

So, all things being "equal" (LOL) ... good news!!!!

[Former Nun]

8 hours ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

The “lump” however, is actually a bulge due to a hernia. That’s because of the muscle she had to cut through when doing the reconstruction. It hasn’t grown, but I will monitor it. If it becomes bigger, she’ll put a mesh in. It’s not painful but just looks...wonky when I’m looking down at my tummy while standing.

My son had a "lump" after having his colon removed.  The doctor put in mesh when he gave him he dreaded ostomy bag.  It was flat for a month or so but it's back to a lump.

Ask your doc to make sure the mesh will hold!

[Jaded]

@imjagain said on 3/20/2018 at 10:53am

Quote

Maybe.

Do people really pressure people to have children? 

 I live in the Midwest and even here, I don't see people putting pressure on young people to have children.  Idk maybe I'm wrong , I have 2 20 somethings and a 7 year old so I'm not really in rush for grandkids and don't  care if they have children  (shrugs).

MM maybe needs to talk to her inlaws and parent if it's such a touchy subject.  Because I don't care if she has children. 

Yes, women especially get most of the pressure to have kids. I'm a member of some childfree groups on Facebook and have been shocked at what family members and even strangers have said to women that have posted after finding out they don't want kids. One woman who doesn't want kids due to health issues she doesn't want to pass on had a grandmother tell her she needed to have kids so she could pass on the unique ear shape her grandfather  had since she was the grandchild that ended up with that unique feature. A lot of women get told they are being selfish if for not wanting kids and that they will never know real love because of not having them.

I felt guilty for not making my Mom a grandma since she loved kids so much. I never told her that though and she never pestered or even asked me about kids. A few months before she died while we were watching TV she randomly told me not to ever feel guilty about not having kids especially if I didn't want them. I didn't think I needed to hear that but it made me feel better after hearing it and it's something I'm thankful she said to me. I helped her when she was a caregiver for my Nana when I was young and I was my Mom's sole caregiver even hospice didn't do that much which surprised me. I just don't have it in me to care for anyone anymore besides my cat. 

Edited March 21, 2018 by Jaded

[blondiec0332]

3 hours ago, Jaded said:

@imjagain said on 3/20/2018 at 10:53am

Yes, women especially get most of the pressure to have kids. I'm a member of some childfree groups on Facebook and have been shocked at what family members and even strangers have said to women that have posted after finding out they don't want kids. One woman who doesn't want kids due to health issues she doesn't want to pass on had a grandmother tell her she needed to have kids so she could pass on the unique ear shape her grandfather  had since she was the grandchild that ended up with that unique feature. A lot of women get told they are being selfish if for not wanting kids and that they will never know real love because of not having them.

I felt guilty for not making my Mom a grandma since she loved kids so much. I never told her that though and she never pestered or even asked me about kids. A few months before she died while we were watching TV she randomly told me not to ever feel guilty about not having kids especially if I didn't want them. I didn't think I needed to hear that but it made me feel better after hearing it and it's something I'm thankful she said to me. I helped her when she was a caregiver for my Nana when I was young and I was my Mom's sole caregiver even hospice didn't do that much which surprised me. I just don't have it in me to care for anyone anymore besides my cat. 

Back in the late 80s I was a white woman involved with a black man.  I had decided to not have children because I didn't want any child of mine to be born into a world that would judge him by his skin color.  Fast forward a couple years and I thought why am I letting a bunch of racists prevent me from becoming a mother.  So I had a kid.  He is 25 now and yes  he has faced varying degrees of racism but I think I've raised him to stand strong and not let anyone make him feel less than the great man he is.

I don't for one minute believe Meghan's reasons for not having children are in any deeper than she doesn't want to be bothered.

[backformore]

I have two grown sons.  I get some comments from other women in my family, who don't understand that not everyone is on the same path. The norm might be that people get married and have children, but that doesn't mean that's the path for everyone.  My kids are intelligent, good men who have careers and interests. One is in a relationship, one is not. I have never assumed that they have to marry and have kids, they can figure it out on their own.

What I get is "but don't you want grandchildren?" As though I am SUPPOSED to pressure my kids to reproduce.  And the women who ask this are women who have taken on being the daycare for THEIR grandchildren. Sure, if I have grandkids one day, I'd love them. But I have no interest in having kids dropped off at my house each morning so their parents can go to work. I have a life and a career.  

When my kids were younger, my life centered around them. I loved it. Now my life is my own. Having children is such a huge responsibility, I think it's terrible to pressure someone into making that choice.

I do think that women get pressure that men don't get.  It's ridiculous. Raising children can be wonderful. But it's not all there is to life, and it's certainly not for everyone.

[Aquarius]

1 hour ago, blondiec0332 said:

I don't for one minute believe Meghan's reasons for not having children are in any deeper than she doesn't want to be bothered.

That was my reason.  And you know what?   That's exactly why I am A-OK with my decision not have children.  And if that's also Meghan's reason, unless her feelings (shallow or not) change, she shouldn't either.

It always strikes me that women who decide not to have children are expected to have some sort of deep, meaningful, unselfish reason for it.  Yet women who do have children for reasons that are shallow, meaningless and selfish (babies are so cute!, I always wanted to take care of something, we always had 3 children apiece in our family, I'm tired of the pressure from my mother-in-law, yada, yada, yada, yada) are very rarely questioned on their decision. 

[blondiec0332]

1 hour ago, backformore said:

I have two grown sons.  I get some comments from other women in my family, who don't understand that not everyone is on the same path. The norm might be that people get married and have children, but that doesn't mean that's the path for everyone.  My kids are intelligent, good men who have careers and interests. One is in a relationship, one is not. I have never assumed that they have to marry and have kids, they can figure it out on their own.

What I get is "but don't you want grandchildren?" As though I am SUPPOSED to pressure my kids to reproduce.  And the women who ask this are women who have taken on being the daycare for THEIR grandchildren. Sure, if I have grandkids one day, I'd love them. But I have no interest in having kids dropped off at my house each morning so their parents can go to work. I have a life and a career.  

When my kids were younger, my life centered around them. I loved it. Now my life is my own. Having children is such a huge responsibility, I think it's terrible to pressure someone into making that choice.

I do think that women get pressure that men don't get.  It's ridiculous. Raising children can be wonderful. But it's not all there is to life, and it's certainly not for everyone.

My son married a woman who had two children so now I'm a glamma (glamourous grandma, I stole it from Goldie Hawn) and I love having them in my life but I have to agree with backformore I have no interest in raising them.  I raised my son and now he gets the privilege of doing the same with his.

2 minutes ago, Aquarius said:

That was my reason.  And you know what?   That's exactly why I am A-OK with my decision not have children.  And if that's also Meghan's reason, unless her feelings (shallow or not) change, she shouldn't either.

I'm not judging women who don't have children simply because they don't want to. Although when Meghan said having a baby ruins your body or however she put it I did judge her just a bit.   What irks me is men are never judged for not having kids.

And I absolutely agree with you about people having children for selfish reasons.  They want someone to love them or they think it will save their marriage.  

[backformore]

5 minutes ago, blondiec0332 said:

I'm not judging women who don't have children simply because they don't want to. Although when Meghan said having a baby ruins your body or however she put it I did judge her just a bit.   What irks me is men are never judged for not having kids.

it goes back to the old thinking that a man who isn't married is a "bachelor", whereas a woman who isn't married is an "old maid". 

though nowadays, people don't say old maid as much, they talk about crazy cat ladies. 

5 minutes ago, blondiec0332 said:

And I absolutely agree with you about people having children for selfish reasons.  They want someone to love them or they think it will save their marriage.  

What has irked me is women who LOVE babies - to the point that when their child grows out of the baby phase, they feel the need to have another. And another.  Babies are fun to cuddle, sure.  But children need nurturing, love and guidance for a lot longer than infancy. 

[blondiec0332]

1 minute ago, backformore said:

What has irked me is women who LOVE babies - to the point that when their child grows out of the baby phase, they feel the need to have another. And another.  Babies are fun to cuddle, sure.  But children need nurturing, love and guidance for a lot longer than infancy. 

I like what Sara said.  That she didn't have children because she wanted babies.  She had children because she wanted a family.

[imjagain]

Thank you all for answering my question.  I guess maybe I never think "when will my two oldest have babies?" And have friends that are not worried about having grandkids. And friends that don't have children or plan to, and had a mother that also never cared if her children had children . In fact she encouraged us not to have children lol, joking kind of but not really. It just struck me as odd that MM makes a big deal about it.  But ofcourse,  I should remember that my experience is not everyones.  

Edited March 21, 2018 by imjagain

[blondiec0332]

9 minutes ago, imjagain said:

It just struck me as odd that MM makes a big deal about it. 

I think Meghan is getting pressured to have kids.  She did marry into an evangelical family.

[imjagain]

3 minutes ago, blondiec0332 said:

I think Meghan is getting pressured to have kids.  She did marry into an evangelical family.

Yes, I forgot about that. She probably is.  

[blondiec0332]

Meghan dear people can care about Russian interference in the 2016 election, North Korea and Trump having affairs and paying them off with campaign contributions all at the same time.   We can focus on more than one thing at a time unlike you who seems to be only able to focus on Hillary Clinton.

[backformore]

10 hours ago, blondiec0332 said:

I think Meghan is getting pressured to have kids.  She did marry into an evangelical family.

When one if my friends from college was the first of our group to get married, I committed a faux pas at her bridal shower.  One friend was wondering if the bride to be would have kids right away.  I commented that since she was in her second year of dental school, she'd probably wait a while. 

I said this not realizing that her strict Catholic mother was standing right there. The mother gasped and said "she'll have children when God decides to give them to her."  I had forgotten that in the Catholic Church, any type of birth control was considered a sin, as it went against God's plan.

[maggiemae]

Could care less if MM has kids.....and think her reason is really stupid. For a thinking person (?) it makes no sense. Wasn't it something to do with her body? OTOH - if she has kids and doesn't want them that is even worse.

[Tosia]

11 hours ago, backformore said:

When one if my friends from college was the first of our group to get married, I committed a faux pas at her bridal shower.  One friend was wondering if the bride to be would have kids right away.  I commented that since she was in her second year of dental school, she'd probably wait a while. 

I said this not realizing that her strict Catholic mother was standing right there. The mother gasped and said "she'll have children when God decides to give them to her."  I had forgotten that in the Catholic Church, any type of birth control was considered a sin, as it went against God's plan.

Yeah, I was raised Catholic, and it was a well-known secret that birth control was ok among my mom's friends and relatives, cuz the pope was a man and didn't understand.

There were also alot of smokers back in the day and both my mom and aunt had several serious  miscarriages. My aunt had 7 kids and her Dr. prescribed the pill.  Most families had 4-6 children back in the early 1960's. In my parish, there were only  two families of strict believers who each  had 13 children each. No, thank you.  

[GHScorpiosRule]

13 hours ago, maggiemae said:

Could care less if MM has kids.....and think her reason is really stupid. For a thinking person (?) it makes no sense. Wasn't it something to do with her body? OTOH - if she has kids and doesn't want them that is even worse.

I think you mean "Couldn't care less. Because if you could care less, that means you care a little!

Sorry, couldn't resist.

[GHScorpiosRule]

Hey y'all! I'm going to be on Good Day Washington (Local CBS affiliate) tomorrow at 9:00-10:00 EST! Supporting the owner of Lolly Locks!

Just thought I'd share. I just got the invite to attend, so I'm not sure if I'll be on the stage or in the audience. Then we have a Host breakfast.

??????

[whydoiwatchtv]

Wrong thread!

Edited April 17, 2018 by whydoiwatchtv

[Haleth]

Congrats, Scorp!

[GHScorpiosRule]

1 minute ago, 17wheatthins said:

Congratulations! ???? 

WHUT? No Shawn'N'Gus gif?????????

[GHScorpiosRule]

19 hours ago, 17wheatthins said:

 

 

NOW WE TALKIN'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was a great show. We were the last segment. Studio is verrrrrry small. Two rows for the audience. And from where we sat, the interview/couch area was slightly to our right; the cooking segment set, to our left.

For our segment, the host Kristen Berset-Harris ( who will be the emcee for our fundraiser in two weeks), decided to sit next to the Lolly Locks' executive director (it's named for her mom, who died of ovarian cancer years ago). And I just happened to be sitting next to her! So I think I made it onto the teevee after all! We had a nice chat with both hosts after the show and got a tour of the new news desk.  They had a food segment for the upcoming District Winery Festival. A few of us were miffed they didn't share the rose wine!!!!! There was plenty enough bott'es to go around!

But I had a great time. Haven't been able to find the show on youtube yet to see. 

Interestingly enough, I don't know if it's because it's a local show, but when the other host was talking with some guy who does the HIPHOP tic tac toe on VH-1, who is in Hollywood, we couldn't hear him; we saw him on the small monitor, but couldn't hear a blasted thing he was saying. I wonder if any of audience members can hear Whoopi when she's in Hollywood and the ladies are speaking with her? Or maybe the bigger more national/syndicated shows have the equipment to allow for her to be heard? Otherwise, all the audience sees are the ladies talking to no one.

[Jaded]

17 minutes ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

NOW WE TALKIN'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was a great show. We were the last segment. Studio is verrrrrry small. Two rows for the audience. And from where we sat, the interview/couch area was slightly to our right; the cooking segment set, to our left.

For our segment, the host Kristen Berset-Harris ( who will be the emcee for our fundraiser in two weeks), decided to sit next to the Lolly Locks' executive director (it's named for her mom, who died of ovarian cancer years ago). And I just happened to be sitting next to her! So I think I made it onto the teevee after all! We had a nice chat with both hosts after the show and got a tour of the new news desk.  They had a food segment for the upcoming District Winery Festival. A few of us were miffed they didn't share the rose wine!!!!! There was plenty enough bott'es to go around!

But I had a great time. Haven't been able to find the show on youtube yet to see. 

Here's a clip of it on their website. I'm not sure if it's the whole segment or not. This clip is a little over 2 minutes long.

http://www.wusa9.com/video/entertainment/television/programs/great-day-washington/lollys-locks-provides-free-high-quality-wigs-for-cancer-patients/65-8100109

[GHScorpiosRule]

24 minutes ago, Jaded said:

Here's a clip of it on their website. I'm not sure if it's the whole segment or not. This clip is a little over 2 minutes long.

http://www.wusa9.com/video/entertainment/television/programs/great-day-washington/lollys-locks-provides-free-high-quality-wigs-for-cancer-patients/65-8100109

It was a small segment and I see me! Yeah the camera makes me look BLOATED, ????

[Medicine Crow]

3 hours ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

NOW WE TALKIN'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was a great show. We were the last segment. Studio is verrrrrry small. Two rows for the audience. And from where we sat, the interview/couch area was slightly to our right; the cooking segment set, to our left.

For our segment, the host Kristen Berset-Harris ( who will be the emcee for our fundraiser in two weeks), decided to sit next to the Lolly Locks' executive director (it's named for her mom, who died of ovarian cancer years ago). And I just happened to be sitting next to her! So I think I made it onto the teevee after all! We had a nice chat with both hosts after the show and got a tour of the new news desk.  They had a food segment for the upcoming District Winery Festival. A few of us were miffed they didn't share the rose wine!!!!! There was plenty enough bott'es to go around!

But I had a great time. Haven't been able to find the show on youtube yet to see. 

Interestingly enough, I don't know if it's because it's a local show, but when the other host was talking with some guy who does the HIPHOP tic tac toe on VH-1, who is in Hollywood, we couldn't hear him; we saw him on the small monitor, but couldn't hear a blasted thing he was saying. I wonder if any of audience members can hear Whoopi when she's in Hollywood and the ladies are speaking with her? Or maybe the bigger more national/syndicated shows have the equipment to allow for her to be heard? Otherwise, all the audience sees are the ladies talking to no one.

Were you wearing a navy suit with a white blouse?  If so, you looked great!!

[GHScorpiosRule]

25 minutes ago, Medicine Crow said:

Were you wearing a navy suit with a white blouse?  If so, you looked great!!

Yeah, that was me.☺️

And wow-my eyes were really bothering me, but I didn’t realize that my contacts feeling like they’d Pop out, caused me to ARCH my eyebrows!?

And thank you! And you as well @17wheatthins!

Edited April 19, 2018 by GHScorpiosRule

[lookeyloo]

@GHScorpiosRule - very nice piece!  You look so professional!  

[Tunia]

Nice to see you, Scorp, especially looking so well!

[GHScorpiosRule]

 I went to Nordstrom today to buy a dress for the Lolly Locks' fund raiser in a couple weeks, I asked my new personal shopper if she could measure me to determine what my bra size is now. Post surgery, I went down a band AND cup size. A DD, but it's now 36 DD, instead of 38 DDD it was before. And the two bras she recommended and had me try out were sooooooo comfortable and didn't look like my boobs were trying to pop out and there was no gap. But HOO BOY! The prices!!!! I just about passed out. So I just bought two. Maybe I can find comparable ones at Target?

I'll post the picture of the dress she found and I'm now a medium instead of a large. 

[GHScorpiosRule]

Hope this translates well-had to hook it over my linen closet!?? just ignore those items!

 

[blondiec0332]

39 minutes ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

Hope this translates well-had to hook it over my linen closet!?? just ignore those items!

 

What are your accessories going to be?  And of course we need to see what shoes you are going to wear. 

[lookeyloo]

14 hours ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

 I went to Nordstrom today to buy a dress for the Lolly Locks' fund raiser in a couple weeks, I asked my new personal shopper if she could measure me to determine what my bra size is now. Post surgery, I went down a band AND cup size. A DD, but it's now 36 DD, instead of 38 DDD it was before. And the two bras she recommended and had me try out were sooooooo comfortable and didn't look like my boobs were trying to pop out and there was no gap. But HOO BOY! The prices!!!! I just about passed out. So I just bought two. Maybe I can find comparable ones at Target?

I'll post the picture of the dress she found and I'm now a medium instead of a large. 

Lovely dress!  Re spendy bras. Don’t put them in the dryer and they will last for years. Over time you can build a nice bra wardrobe. They will last even longer when you have more of them to rotate. Also once you know your brand and size sometimes you can find new with tags on eBay for less money.  And check amazon. 

[GHScorpiosRule]

On 4/21/2018 at 7:35 PM, blondiec0332 said:

What are your accessories going to be?  And of course we need to see what shoes you are going to wear. 

I'm thinking either the diamond/peridot set my parents gave me years ago, or An Amethyst set.

I'll be wearing my 4 inch heels! My feet will be pissed at me, but they make my legs look sexy! Hee.

[GHScorpiosRule]

On 4/23/2018 at 1:22 PM, 17wheatthins said:

I’m partial to amethyst, but you’ll look gorgeous in anything. XO

Oh, so am I! It's my birthstone, after all!

Oh Boo! Turns out that Amethyst set is all fakarooni, and the one stone in one of the earrings, popped out. BAH! So diamond and peridot set it is.

[GHScorpiosRule]

Since you all already know what I look like...

 

[Medicine Crow]

Woo Hoo ... all dressed up, looking lovely!!!

[GHScorpiosRule]

My jewelry-earrings are matching 

 

[lookeyloo]

Look at you!  So lovely and put together!!!  Legs looking great!!

[BuckeyeLou]

1 hour ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

My jewelry-earrings are matching 

 

Beautiful jewelry!  You look so lovely!

[Haleth]

Lookin' good, Scorp!

[GHScorpiosRule]

Thanks everyone! My feet HAAATE me now for torturing them for five hours in those heels!!!

Be wearing sandals tomorrow fer sure.

I met so many strong and inspirational women tonight. And realized I’m one of the lucky ones.

[Jaded]

I Couldn’t Believe It When My OB-GYN Told Me I ‘Should’ Have Kids

[Tunia]

From Meghan's thread, regarding Justin Bieber:

                                                                                                      

Quote

 

CheezyXpressed

18 minutes ago

<snip>

I know. I've made the joke many times as well lol. I never cared for him (still don't), but I always feel bad for the kid since everyone hates him. I'd take him over Justin Timberlake any day.

 

When I was expecting my second son, one of the names considered was Justin - and that was even before Timberlake existed.  How happy I am today that I named him Jason instead, because I wouldn't be able to handle the association to either Bieber or Timberlake, neither of which I enjoy.  However, at the time, we jettisoned the name b/c I was afraid it would be shortened to "Just", and I could picture the teasing of his schoolmates as "Oh, it's 'Juuuust' TuniaSon...".  I think he's happier also.  :-)

[WarnerCL45]

19 hours ago, Tunia said:

From Meghan's thread, regarding Justin Bieber:

                                                                                                      

When I was expecting my second son, one of the names considered was Justin - and that was even before Timberlake existed.  How happy I am today that I named him Jason instead, because I wouldn't be able to handle the association to either Bieber or Timberlake, neither of which I enjoy.  However, at the time, we jettisoned the name b/c I was afraid it would be shortened to "Just", and I could picture the teasing of his schoolmates as "Oh, it's 'Juuuust' TuniaSon...".  I think he's happier also.  :-)

How about “Justin Trudeau”?

[Tunia]

1 hour ago, WarnerCL45 said:

How about “Justin Trudeau”?

A fine and beautiful exception!

[Haleth]

Hey guys, I read Joe Biden's book (in about 2 days).  Lots of information about his son's bout with cancer (the same type Meghan's dad has), but also an interesting look into what Joe was doing during that year in the administration.  It's a quick read, very moving.  It's the book he was plugging on the show a few months ago.

[Haleth]

Sorry about another post.  I ordered an item from View Your Deal the other day... the little purse that holds just the essentials.  It's a perfect size for phone, cards, and a couple other odds and ends.  It's cute.  Not fine leather goods by any means, but for $10 it will be great to take to football games and other events with a purse policy.