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S05.E17: Amster-Damn Slap


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If I had been Lisa V, I would have smacked Brandi right back and put the force of all my weight behind it.  Brought tears to that bitch's eyes.  And then laughed uproariously, because we were just joking and having a grand old time.

 

This would only turn Brandi into a victim.  I'm suspicious of her in that I think she wanted to force some "fun" with Lisa, but also, if Lisa had hit her first or hit her back, she'd use that against Lisa later on. 

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I, too, think that in Brandi's twisted mind, the slap was meant as a joke, however, this is exactly what the other women were trying to tell her - she takes things too far!!  

 

Brandi doesn't know when to give up or stop.  The situation with slapping Lisa was the same type of situation as with Eileen.  Eileen kept telling Brandi that she didn't want to "play soap opera", and Brandi didn't listen and threw the wine.

 

Brandi wanted Lisa to hit for (for whatever stupid reason....), and Lisa kept saying "no" and so, Brandi slapped her.  

 

Brandi is an ass.....

I swear, when you tell Brandi NO on anything she does the exact opposite like a 2 year old throwing a temper tantrum.

 

The main thing is she didn't slap Lisa with an intent to cause harm.  And that's it.  And as far as the show goes, Lisa & Brandi are peers, so I still see no harm done.  Altho I can see why Lisa felt disrespected.  I know I would feel the same way.  But there's nothing here to think much about, let alone tell people about & rehash a zillion times.  

 

Now, if Brandi slapped an authority figure -- or a production person -- even if she was just kidding around?  She could get herself into a shitload of hot water.  Just to give a sorta related example, Patti Stanger slapped a production person on her show a few years ago & Millionaire Matchmaker was pulled off the air for over a year & almost didn't return.

 

To say Brandi makes horrible, horrible choices & always behaves like an idiot would be an understatement, to say the least.  

 

This reminds me of something that happened at Conde Nast maybe 10 years ago, where a publisher butted the heads of 2 salespeople who worked for him -- all while being "playful".  Well, one of the salespeople broke her nose due to this.  Oh, sure enough, there was big trouble there, but Conde settled things out privately by apparently generously paying off the woman with the broken nose & moving the publisher to another job, before eventually pushing him out of the company.  

 

Anyhoo, if Brandi had harmed Lisa with her "playful/just-kidding" slap, she'd be in big fuckin' trouble.  The woman makes such dumb fuckin' choices.  I'm a believer that eventually you pay for bad choices & there are always consequences for horrible behavior.  Basically, Brandi seems really miserable, so there is that.

I see it a bit differently, IMO, just mine, Brandi does this to gain the upper hand. If whoever complies with her request, wine toss/face slap, she then has something to hold over them when she gets nasty to them the next time, the time after that and on down the line. When that person calls her out on her bad behavior, she will say, well I let you slap me so this is payback and you have to forgive me. It is a twisted control game with her.

 

Also, it was not just a slap, first she pulled LisaV toward her, then shoved/pushed her back then slapped her on the face after being told NO repeatedly.

 

Well, at least we all know that Brandi made it through the 20 day cleanse and came out drinking AND swinging....

 

I was liking kind of liking Lisa R up until the canal cruise dinner.  She really is a people pleaser - she didn't have to go all sweetness and light and blow sunshine up Kim's ass....she could have just said that she admired Kim's something or other.....

I was disappointed that LisaR went overboard in her "nice" comments to Kim/Brandi! Sad IMO.

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The thing is, if this happens on your own personal time -- unless there is some obviously threatening behavior involved, there's not much you can do about it really, except hopefully avoiding the offending person.  BUT if this happens while you're working, that's a whole other ballgame.  Then there's a lot you can do.  And what I sometimes forget is (and I have to admit, I did, for a second, forget) these women are all working here -- even Kim the junkie.  So basically idiot Brandi slapped Lisa while on the Bravo paycheck.  Hmmmm.  Call the lawyers, pronto!

 

Actually there's plenty you can do.  Putting your hands on another person, even something seemingly as harmless as a slap, is assault.  You can call the cops.

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It is so very interesting that Brandi comes up with this game and then, when it's finally her turn, she flees.  I guess she was surprised at how sincere (ok - maybe nice) the other women were to each other and they really put something into it.  Well, except her.  The game didn't work the way Brandi thought it would.  And yeah, she was totally terrified that many of the other women would say, when it came to Brandi, "I've got nothing."  No sympathy from me Brandi.  I wish they all had said those words.

 

Yes, as others have said, Eileen won the night.  You could see that it was really hard for her because it seemed that she was ready to cry a few times.

 

Slapping Lisa?  Yeah, Lisa was trying very hard to keep it light, and then wham.  What's the purpose Brandi?  And yeah, you are a mean drunk and you are a liar.

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But there's nothing here to think much about, let alone tell people about & rehash a zillion times.  

 

To say Brandi makes horrible, horrible choices & always behaves like an idiot would be an understatement, to say the least.  

 

 

I'm with you.  I just don't have it in me.  It's all been said a thousand times.

 

If I had to give any of these housewives a grade for their behavior tonight,  half of them would fail.   The exceptions being Yolanda and LisaV.  I'd also give Eileen a passing grade but her choice of a venue to get things off her chest earns her a demerit.

 

As usual, Kim and Brandi would get a failing grade.  I'd give Kyle a D.

 

And finally, LisaR would not only get a failing grade for being so incredibly two faced  but she should probably have to sit in detention for lying to Eileen.

Edited by AnnA
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I'm surprised that you disagree but that's OK.

 

I agree with what you said about Kim and Brandi and also understand that Eileen needed to have her say.   However, I do not believe that the "right" place for these women to rehash their problems was on that dinner boat.   There's a time and a place for everything.  They could have and should have had that discussion privately in one of their hotel rooms.   

It is scenes like this that pay for the crew's unlimited space cake adventure. Private hotel rooms and all you get is a semi-fizzy soda.

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BTW, it was nice to see red lipstick - or *any* color - of lipstick on Kyle. Anyone have any idea of when the Housewives trend of black raccoon eyes with giant fake eyelashes and nude lipstick is finally going to go out of style?

Edited by missy jo
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The thing is, if this happens on your own personal time -- unless there is some obviously threatening behavior involved, there's not much you can do about it really, except hopefully avoiding the offending person.  BUT if this happens while you're working, that's a whole other ballgame.  Then there's a lot you can do.  And what I sometimes forget is (and I have to admit, I did, for a second, forget) these women are all working here -- even Kim the junkie.  So basically idiot Brandi slapped Lisa while on the Bravo paycheck.  Hmmmm.  Call the lawyers, pronto!

If someone slaps me on my personal time (or at work), I can get them arrested. It's called simple assault. 

Edited by venusnv80
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It is so very interesting that Brandi comes up with this game and then, when it's finally her turn, she flees.  I guess she was surprised at how sincere (ok - maybe nice) the other women were to each other and they really put something into it.  Well, except her.  The game didn't work the way Brandi thought it would.  And yeah, she was totally terrified that many of the other women would say, when it came to Brandi, "I've got nothing."  No sympathy from me Brandi.  I wish they all had said those words.

 

Yes, as others have said, Eileen won the night.  You could see that it was really hard for her because it seemed that she was ready to cry a few times.

 

Slapping Lisa?  Yeah, Lisa was trying very hard to keep it light, and then wham.  What's the purpose Brandi?  And yeah, you are a mean drunk and you are a liar.

She's a lieing liar who lies!!!! And a mean drunk

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You can call the cops.

 

 

She wasn't hurt & there was no threat.  She could make accusations, I suppose, but the cops wouldn't bother with doing much about this, unless there was some history of stalking, which there isn't.  On a personal level, there are no grounds for a lawsuit or any reason for cops to get involved.

 

But in terms of the show, I really don't want to see them going all around about this endlessly & discussing it to death.  But I would like to hear Lisa say outright how this was a terrible & unwanted invasion of her privacy & space.  AND Brandi should absolutely apologize for it.  If Lisa felt disrespected & violated, then it is most certainly a very big deal & she deserves an apology from asshole Brandi.  Will she get one?  Good luck with that one.

Edited by ScoobieDoobs
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She wasn't hurt & there was no threat.  She could make accusations, I suppose, but the cops wouldn't bother with doing much about this, unless there was some history of stalking which there isn't.  On a personal level, there are no grounds for a lawsuit or any reason for cops to get involved.

I respectfully disagree.  It was assault.  There were witnesses.  I hope when they boot the hag off the show Lisa V gets a restraining order.

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She wasn't hurt & there was no threat.  She could make accusations, I suppose, but the cops wouldn't bother with doing much about this, unless there was some history of stalking which there isn't.  On a personal level, there are no grounds for a lawsuit or any reason for cops to get involved.

LOL...it's on tape. There are simple rules in life, you can't slap other people without repercussions. Stalking has nothing to do with it. 

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Tonight I am just team pancake! Yum, I know what I am having for breakfast tomorrow.

Only if a Dutch chef comes to my house and cooks them for me.  Otherwise I'm stuck with Cheerio's

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She wasn't hurt & there was no threat.  She could make accusations, I suppose, but the cops wouldn't bother with doing much about this, unless there was some history of stalking which there isn't.  On a personal level, there are no grounds for a lawsuit or any reason for cops to get involved.

 

But in terms of the show, I really don't want to see them going all around about this endlessly & discussing it to death.  But I would like to hear Lisa say outright how this was a terrible & unwanted invasion of her privacy & space.  AND Brandi should absolutely apologize for it.  If Lisa felt disrespected & violated, then it is most certainly a very big deal & she deserves an apology from asshole Brandi.  Will she get one?  Good luck with that one.

 

I didn't say to do it with the intent of prosecution or arrest.  But a cop will take a report and there will be a record of it for the next time.  Eventually there's a pattern.  This is why you constantly hear prosecutors ask people who are victims of domestic violence if they ever called the cops and got a complaint on record.  There is rarely, if ever, a witness.....but there is always a report filed.

 

And I disagree, there was threat.  Brandi blocked her from leaving a few times.  And a few more times after she did it.

Edited by CaughtOnTape
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I missed a bit of the Eileen airing her grievances at the boat cruise dinner, did Kim ever apologize to her or even Kyle? Did Brandi apologize for her comments toward Eileen and the home wrecker comment? 

 

LisaR did go overboard in her telling Kim something nice about her, but I still like her.

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I missed a bit of the Eileen airing her grievances at the boat cruise dinner, did Kim ever apologize to her or even Kyle? Did Brandi apologize for her comments toward Eileen and the home wrecker comment? 

 

LisaR did go overboard in her telling Kim something nice about her, but I still like her.

No and No.

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If anyone thinks that Brandi's stupid, inappropriate and unfunny joke "slap" of LisaV was assault then they must also believe that LisaR's throwing a glass was assault with a deadly weapon.  Any of the women sitting at that table could have had a shard of glass stuck in their throat.

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Well, Brandi's lost any high ground she thought she had over Lisa R's glass smash and Kyle's flying fingers* now that her wine and her hand have been on someone's face. 

 

 

*Funny how Brandi didn't include BFF Kim with Kyle's name when she was going off about the Finger Tourette's (Thank you, poster who coined this).  

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This would only turn Brandi into a victim.  I'm suspicious of her in that I think she wanted to force some "fun" with Lisa, but also, if Lisa had hit her first or hit her back, she'd use that against Lisa later on. 

 

And, this is exactly why Lisa only tolerates being around Brandi...she has seen and experienced all of this already, and has learned a hard lesson from it.  The look of utter shock on Lisa's face after Brandi slapped her was very telling.  She was hurt (not physically), disturbed and angered.  

 

Kudos to Lisa for keeping her cool!!!  

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I have a memory like Kim's (without the substance abuse history) so help me out here but what did Kyle say to Yolanda about someone told Kim she had to apologize to Lisa R last week? It was a name I wasn't familiar with, like maybe a producer? I also wonder if the reason Lisa R is being so nice to Kim now is because she doesn't want Kim to blab any secrets about her marriage.

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It is so very interesting that Brandi comes up with this game and then, when it's finally her turn, she flees.  I guess she was surprised at how sincere (ok - maybe nice) the other women were to each other and they really put something into it.  Well, except her.  The game didn't work the way Brandi thought it would.  And yeah, she was totally terrified that many of the other women would say, when it came to Brandi, "I've got nothing."  No sympathy from me Brandi.  I wish they all had said those words.

 

Yes, as others have said, Eileen won the night.  You could see that it was really hard for her because it seemed that she was ready to cry a few times.

 

Slapping Lisa?  Yeah, Lisa was trying very hard to keep it light, and then wham.  What's the purpose Brandi?  And yeah, you are a mean drunk and you are a liar.

I think Brandi thought the other women, except Kim, would follow her style of "compliment" and not say nice things about her personality. I think she did this to be able to say, "See, you just don't like me and never have, you never even gave me a chance", a new twist on her victim claim against the other HWs.

 

I'm with you.  I just don't have it in me.  It's all been said a thousand times.

 

If I had to give any of these housewives a grade for their behavior tonight,  half of them would fail.   The exceptions being Yolanda and LisaV.  I'd also give Eileen a passing grade but her choice of a venue to get things off her chest earns her a demerit.

 

As usual, Kim and Brandi would get a failing grade.  I'd give Kyle a D.

 

And finally, LisaR would not only get a failing grade for being so incredibly two faced  but she should probably have to sit in detention for lying to Eileen.

I was disappointed with Lisar tonight as well but then read hers and Eileens blogs. What Eileen said made sense as did LisaR blog as well. She says she did what she had to so that she could just get through the trip, Eileen says the same thing about her as well.

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I love that LisaV and Kyle are finding their way back to each other.  Their friendship was one of the things I enjoyed the most because they always had so much fun together. 

 

I think Brandi looked like shit on the boat.  Her hair, her makeup, her outfit.......all badly done.

 

I love, love, love Eileen Davidson!  The woman certainly knows how to handle herself and didn't lose her cool no matter how much crap Brandi and Kim came up with. I watch Days of our Lives whenever she appears as the evil Kristen DeMira.  She's not on right now, but I'm hoping she returns because she plays the part so well.

 

I can't wait for next week.  I'm going to have my popcorn and favorite wine ready while I enjoy watching Kim lose her shit. 

 

To me, Brandi looked like they had just pulled her out of one of those windows in the red light district....

Edited by njbchlover
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If anyone thinks that Brandi's stupid, inappropriate and unfunny joke "slap" of LisaV was assault then they must also believe that LisaR's throwing a glass was assault with a deadly weapon.  Any of the women sitting at that table could have had a shard of glass stuck in their throat.

Darn right it was the wrong thing to do, however, the subtle difference is that the glass was not thrown at Kim, it was smashed on the table, and the stem was never thrust at Kim.  The water (or wine) was tossed at Kim.  Irresponsible, absolutely.  I don't believe for a minute that Kim had glass in her pants, or Brandi had glass in the skin of her throat.  LisaR was provoked and dumb enough to take the bait.   LisaV did nothing to encourage Brandi's behaviour, and actually tried to escape Brandi until she was slapped. 

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Brandi is the aggressor in her "crimes".  She tries to force people into "playing" with her and when they refuse, she forces herself on them and then laughs it off as a joke.   Again, creepy as fuck.  She gives me the douche chills. 

That's some rapist logic right there.  "Aw, c'mon....she wanted it."  "I was just joking, she knew that!"  "She said no, but she didn't really mean it!"

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Zoey already brought this up but hell why didn't LisaR not shut down Brandi when she was trying to make those truth-telling "jokes" on everyone. LisaR's was about her eating disorder and she didnt check her! Plus LisaR and Eileen didn't have each other's back. But like I said one page Eileen owned her stuff when it comes to her and Vince. LisaR, even if she was lying, should had defused Brandi trying to point out she could have an eating disorder. Lisa R came off phony and too safe the first time all season. Edited by BlackMamba
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LOL...it's on tape. There are simple rules in life, you can't slap other people without repercussions. Stalking has nothing to do with it.

 

 

Not true.  If there was a history of threats, this would make a huge difference.  But that's not the case here at all.  I worked as a District Attorney for 10 years here in NYC and this (and I mean this specific circumstance of Lisa being slapped by Brandi) would go nowhere, from a legal standpoint.  Some may want to believe it would, but I know for fact it wouldn't.  It sucks, I know, but it wouldn't -- for many reasons not worth going into here.  

 

Anyway, I wonder about the consequences in terms of the show, since they've all certainly signed those Bravo contracts in which they supposedly agree to not do anything to each other legally.  As I said before, in the workplace this behavior would never be tolerated.  And I wonder if those Bravo contracts can be broken.  Probably.

Edited by ScoobieDoobs
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Yolanda sitting there eating her dinner alone nearly broke my damn heart. That would be the last time I'd go anywhere with that boat full of stupid.

 

It isn't as if YoFo has no clue how Brandi is. Afterall, Brandi behaved just as disgusting, if not worse, at YoFo's dinner party where Brandi slammed Joyce and Michael left and right. YoFo allowed that shit to happen and did not do a damn thing to stop it. So, why should YoFo be surprised? If she allowed Brandi to behave like a fucking jackass in her home, why would Brandi behave on a boat in Amsterdam?

 

I agree with you.  Of course, Yolanda is no stranger to Brandi's behavior and of course she wasn't surprised. 

 

Imo, Yolanda was surprised by the behavior of the other clowns, in addition to being disgusted by Brandi.  Perhaps LisaV was the only one not to act like a spoiled turd?  Her hat, though....

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Yes.  One does not negate the other.  If that was your point.

I just happen to agree with Lisa R more than I do with what Brandi did.  There's also a difference.  Could have and did are not the same thing.  No one was hurt.  No one got a shard of glass in their throat.  Brandi, however, DID slap Lisa.  

Quotes are unnecessary.  It wasn't a "slap", it was a slap.  Period.

 

I'm not defending Brandi's actions.  She should not have slapped LissV and I still believe tonight's "slap" was very different from a slap intended to cause harm.  If someone assaults you with a weapon - that's a more serious charge, even if the weapon didn't hit you.

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Not true.  If there was a history of threats, this would make a huge difference.  But that's not the case here at all.  I worked as a District Attorney for 10 years here in NYC and this would go nowhere, from a legal standpoint.  Some may want to believe it would, but I know for fact it wouldn't.  It sucks, I know, but it wouldn't -- for many reasons not worth going into here.  

 

Anyway, let's discuss in terms of the show, since they've all certainly signed those Bravo contracts in which they supposedly agree to not do anything to each other legally.  As I said before, in the workplace this behavior would never be tolerated.  And I wonder if those Bravo contracts can be broken.  Probably.

That's fine, I know criminal law as well as an attorney (in Philadelphia) and yes...it may not result in Brandi bring thrown in jail (which I don't think that ANYONE even said tonight), but Lisa would be able to press charges. I have witnessed it time and time in criminal hearings. So, no...I don't believe that it is as clear cut as no it wouldn't happen AT ALL. 

 

Remind me never to get assaulted in NYC. 

Edited by venusnv80
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It is so very interesting that Brandi comes up with this game and then, when it's finally her turn, she flees.  I guess she was surprised at how sincere (ok - maybe nice) the other women were to each other and they really put something into it.  Well, except her.  The game didn't work the way Brandi thought it would.  And yeah, she was totally terrified that many of the other women would say, when it came to Brandi, "I've got nothing."  No sympathy from me Brandi.  I wish they all had said those words.

 

Yes, as others have said, Eileen won the night.  You could see that it was really hard for her because it seemed that she was ready to cry a few times.

 

Slapping Lisa?  Yeah, Lisa was trying very hard to keep it light, and then wham.  What's the purpose Brandi?  And yeah, you are a mean drunk and you are a liar.

 

I agree...I think that Brandi thought they would all be very superficial, the same way she was.  

 

I don't know whether Brandi cannot see anything past outward appearances (as she said in her talking head), or she was just trying to be "passive-mean" to stir shit, but she, again, managed to make herself look like a total asshole.  

 

I do agree with some of the housewives, though, that Brandi has very, very, very low self-esteem.  

 

I think that Yolanda got a wake up call as to how "genuine" her friend Brandi really is (not at all...).  

 

On the other hand, Kim is still defending her.  

 

Oh, and I'm glad I didn't hold my breath waiting for Kim to apologize to Eileen and Kyle.  My husband would have had to tell all of you that I died, and then you would have had to hold a virtual funeral for me here, LOL!!!     :-)

Edited by njbchlover
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That's some rapist logic right there.  "Aw, c'mon....she wanted it."  "I was just joking, she knew that!"  "She said no, but she didn't really mean it!"

 

Yes and I'm remembering now that she's like this often.  It's like some weird attention/affection/validation thing; the touching, joking and closeness she seems to crave.  Add to that her saying that her boys still (at that time) sleep in bed with her and it's clear she has attachment/boundary issues. 

 

I'd feel sad for her if she didn't annoy the shit out of me so much.   

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I'm not defending Brandi's actions.  She should not have slapped LissV and I still believe tonight's "slap" was very different from a slap intended to cause harm.  If someone assaults you with a weapon - that's a more serious charge, even if the weapon didn't hit you.

 

Uh, that's the problem.  Brandi's intention was a joke, Lisa didn't take it that way.  At that point, Brandi's intentions DO NOT MATTER.  She went too far and should be held accountable for it.  I don't see why this keeps going round and round since it's pretty evident that Brandi would not let her leave.  Lisa has a right to feel assaulted and humiliated and to discuss that with her friends.  I'm not about to make her feel like she's making something out of nothing.

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She wasn't hurt & there was no threat.  She could make accusations, I suppose, but the cops wouldn't bother with doing much about this, unless there was some history of stalking, which there isn't.  On a personal level, there are no grounds for a lawsuit or any reason for cops to get involved.

 

But in terms of the show, I really don't want to see them going all around about this endlessly & discussing it to death.  But I would like to hear Lisa say outright how this was a terrible & unwanted invasion of her privacy & space.  AND Brandi should absolutely apologize for it.  If Lisa felt disrespected & violated, then it is most certainly a very big deal & she deserves an apology from asshole Brandi.  Will she get one?  Good luck with that one.

 

Brandi will only apologize if Lisa demands it or Yolanda tells her she must.  

 

When she was telling Yolanda about it over coffee the next morning, she had that impish, little-girl-guilty smirk on her face, and that is ONE look that I, for one, would personally be VERY, VERY HAPPY to slap off her silly face!!!  

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I'm not defending Brandi's actions.  She should not have slapped LissV and I still believe tonight's "slap" was very different from a slap intended to cause harm.  If someone assaults you with a weapon - that's a more serious charge, even if the weapon didn't hit you.

LisaV told Brandi several times, NO, and Brandi took it upon herself to slap Lisa. First pulling her toward her so she could not leave the boat then pushing her backwards into the room, followed by the slap and then still blocked Lisa's exit for a another minute or 2. All very calculated IMO. LisaR was wrong to try and grab Kim's face, then toss ice water at Kim and finally break the water/wine glass on the table, all done in the heat of the moment but not calculated at all.

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LisaV told Brandi several times, NO, and Brandi took it upon herself to slap Lisa. First pulling her toward her so she could not leave the boat then pushing her backwards into the room, followed by the slap and then still blocked Lisa's exit for a another minute or 2. All very calculated IMO. LisaR was wrong to try and grab Kim's face, then toss ice water at Kim and finally break the water/wine glass on the table, all done in the heat of the moment but not calculated at all.

 

Yes.  Brandi was creepy and intimidating.  What she did was to try and make Lisa uncomfortable.  

Lisa R, while wrong, was a much more "heat of the moment" type issue.  She was pissed and lost her temper and had some kind of remorse for what she did.

Brandi not only did not, but COULD NOT fathom what she'd done wrong or why Lisa was creeped out, uncomfortable and upset about it.  

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I think Brandi thought the other women, except Kim, would follow her style of "compliment" and not say nice things about her personality. I think she did this to be able to say, "See, you just don't like me and never have, you never even gave me a chance", a new twist on her victim claim against the other HWs.

 

I was disappointed with Lisar tonight as well but then read hers and Eileens blogs. What Eileen said made sense as did LisaR blog as well. She says she did what she had to so that she could just get through the trip, Eileen says the same thing about her as well.

 

I haven't read it yet, but if that is the case, then Lisa R is just throwing her lot in with all the other women, and acting nice and sweet to Kim, for fear of how she will react.  

I guess, for the sake of salvaging what was left of the trip, it makes sense, but I was kind of hoping that she would've stuck to her guns.

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I haven't read it yet, but if that is the case, then Lisa R is just throwing her lot in with all the other women, and acting nice and sweet to Kim, for fear of how she will react.  

I guess, for the sake of salvaging what was left of the trip, it makes sense, but I was kind of hoping that she would've stuck to her guns.

In her blog, she said she called HH and he suggested she stick it out and make the best of it, she was ready to fly home that night and instead took his advice. I still think she is a people pleaser but in this case, she did it for HH more than anyone else.

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