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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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8 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

OK, I have had some drinks (and I am an agnostic), but am I crazy to entertain the thought that maybe there’s a reckoning going on? I am only half joking!

Always?

That is: Isn’t there always a reckoning going on?

I mean:   
Sometimes it’s just having grabbed a few dusty leaves on your way into the outhouse that you later discovered were poison oak. 

Some things only Tequila will fix  
(and I’m not a drinker).

Edited by shapeshifter
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21 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

I guess I should do the same -- though I have not seen my exact town in the list. Are you in Jersey?

No, Long Island.  It’s Sunday now, and we got nothing but a little rain.  It went out to Montauk.  How’s by you?

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My Peeve today is watching QVC and Valerie Parnell selling all her Christmas stuff, and I’m a sucker for Christmas stuff.  Unfortunately, I LOVE all her stuff and always have to buy something, and it’s only August.  Her things are so beautiful. Dammit.

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48 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

No, Long Island.  It’s Sunday now, and we got nothing but a little rain.  It went out to Montauk.  How’s by you?

Lots of rain. It seems to have been downgraded a lot for our area, but some places may have flood watches.

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13 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

but some places may have flood watches

Several years ago I foolishly decided to drive home in ankle deep water. 
By the time I neared home, it was a couple of feet high. 
The car had to be repaired, which lead to me getting locked out of my house when I discovered that the spare house key from the landlord was not to my house. 

I had another too-deep-to-be driving experience in the 90s with a car that steamed up, so I had to keep the window rolled down. A big-wheel truck roared past me drenching my light beige suit in mud. 

Moral of both stories: 
Don't go out when there are flash flood warnings unless you have such a great sense of humor that you don't mind being the butt of the joke.

And it can be life-threatening too.😳

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1 hour ago, kristen111 said:

It’s Sunday now, and we got nothing but a little rain. 

 

1 hour ago, TattleTeeny said:

Lots of rain. It seems to have been downgraded a lot for our area, but some places may have flood watches.

What is this rain you speak of? I am unfamiliar with this word. Maybe some of my neighbors here in Northern California have heard of it.

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6 hours ago, GaT said:

 

What is this rain you speak of? I am unfamiliar with this word. Maybe some of my neighbors here in Northern California have heard of it.

Seattle asks if you'd like a tissue, it's so dry here. I feel like it will never rain again.😭

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2 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

Seattle asks if you'd like a tissue, it's so dry here. I feel like it will never rain again.😭

I wouldn't waste water on a tissue. 😢

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On 8/18/2021 at 3:48 PM, Leeds said:

My pet peeve for the day is people whose only topic of conversation is their various maladies and aches and pains.  A few years ago I made a pact with my two best friends that when we're all together in our local old people's home if one of us starts yammering on about her joints or her bowels the other two have permission to euthanize her.

LOL, my best friend and I have the same pact! Sadly my mother is one of these people, I can't have a single conversation with her where she doesn't launch into whatever is ailing her and in great detail. But she is not alone, I was at a bridal shower recently and was seated next to a nice older lady. After we introduced ourselves we started chatting about the bride, the wedding, etc., about 10 minutes in she started telling me about her recent surgery. It had nothing to do with anything we were talking about. It was a long afternoon. 

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That's one of the tough things about visiting my relatives. There's virtually nobody who's within my age range, all my relatives are either much younger than me or much older than me. So the younger ones are off doing their thing and the older ones are talking about all their various health ailments and other things of that sort and I'm just sitting there in the middle, feeling all awkward and quiet and not really having much of anything to add to the conversation. 

Edited by Annber03
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2 minutes ago, BexKeps said:

LOL, my best friend and I have the same pact! Sadly my mother is one of these people, I can't have a single conversation with her where she doesn't launch into whatever is ailing her and in great detail. But she is not alone, I was at a bridal shower recently and was seated next to a nice older lady. After we introduced ourselves we started chatting about the bride, the wedding, etc., about 10 minutes in she started telling me about her recent surgery. It had nothing to do with anything we were talking about. It was a long afternoon. 

I wonder if she had some dementia or Alzheimer's too, and if going on about one's physical ailments to strangers is a sign of mental decline? (Not that it's not still annoying.)

I remember Mom hating that she and Dad seemed to only go out to see doctors any more, but she didn't dwell on their ailments, and her mind was still working after her body failed. 

My peeve about Mom's conversation was her detailed telling of meals they ate in restaurants. (I'm a eat-to-live not live-to-eat person.)

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20 minutes ago, Annber03 said:

That's one of the tough things about visiting my relatives. There's virtually nobody who's within my age range, all my relatives are either much younger than me or much older than me. So the younger ones are off doing their thing and the older ones are talking about all their various health ailments and other things of that sort and I'm just sitting there in the middle, feeling all awkward and quiet and not really having much of anything to add to the conversation. 

That used to happen to me a lot when I was around my mom, aunt and grandparents. I would always try to change the subject "How about those Mariners?" (my mom was a huge fan) or the latest celebrity scandal (gran was an avid People magazine reader). Sometimes it worked.

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36 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

I wonder if she had some dementia or Alzheimer's too, and if going on about one's physical ailments to strangers is a sign of mental decline? (Not that it's not still annoying.)

Nope, she had all her faculties, very nice lady. With my mom its about attention, she LOVES to have the focus on her. If someone, especially my dad, is the focus of a conversation she will start interjecting things about herself to get everyone to feel sorry for her. Case in point: my dad had a mild stroke last September (fully recovered, thank heavens) while at home with my mom, she had to call the ambulance. In a later FB post about it she thanked the EMT's for "coming to my aide at my time of need." My sister and I just shake our heads. 

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In law school, a classmate with whom I was friendly through our membership in a club had some sort of medical emergency I can no longer recall the nature of, and when I brought some stuff by her apartment she told me the whole tale.  (I don't mind listening to stuff like that, although I certainly understand the peeve about people who only talk about their ailments.)  When she finished, she remarked something along the lines of, "Jesus, I sound 80 years old.  Next I'll be telling you about my gout."

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24 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

I have that problem when it comes to siblings.  The one nearest my age is seven years older.  I was never close with any of them, because they were all at different stages of life.  In fact, my oldest sibling was already going to college before I was born.

Your situation sounds similar to that of my parents - they were the youngest in their families, too, and by quite a bit as well. They were close with some of their siblings, but yeah, others, it was harder to really form that kind of bond.

My sister's only about 3 1/2 years younger than me, so if she's with me on any of those visits, I can talk to her. But at the same time, I also talk to her fairly often as it is, so it's easy to exhaust conversation there, too. 

33 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

That used to happen to me a lot when I was around my mom, aunt and grandparents. I would always try to change the subject "How about those Mariners?" (my mom was a huge fan) or the latest celebrity scandal (gran was an avid People magazine reader). Sometimes it worked.

Heh, yeah, that's a hard thing to do with a lot of my relatives, too. The stuff they're into is stuff that my mom, sister, and I don't follow, and vice versa, and some of the older ones just aren't really pop culture savvy in general, so...  And I don't follow sports, so the most I can really do is listen to everyone else talk about them. 

And there's also the fact that I'm just not a big talker in general, and I usually only see these relatives once a year at the most, around the holidays, so it's harder to really build up that close bond as a result that could make conversation a little easier. 

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While everyone's experiences can vary, for me, I feel like the health-centric conversations can come from a bit of lonliness, or because folks with many or serious health conditions often have a very small world.  When your only social interactions are doctors/nurses/caregivers, perhaps they just find some comfort in talking with someone outside of that realm, even if the subject matter is the same.  At the end of the day, I feel people just are looking for some sense that people care about what is happening to/with them, and that their problems matter.  

I had these very same gripes in my 20's, 30's, 40's...about my parents and their contemporaries; constantly comparing notes about health issues.  Now that I have a husband with many health issues which have limited his/our ability to socialize as we used to, I do find myself discussing these things more than I ever thought I would.

I know not everyone fits ^this explanation, but try to remember that the person sharing this unsolicited information may just need a sounding board, as annoying as it can be.

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34 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

In the old days, before the internet was a thing, I can remember talking to a friend on the phone that was so lonely, that she wouldn't hang up the phone, even though we had run out of things to talk about.

I had a couple of lonely acquaintances I would listen to out of something like compassion/pity — both started in person and transitioned to phone when situations changed. But it was before free unlimited minutes, so eventually I couldn’t continue —which was a mixture of guilt, relief, and sadness.

Now I try to not to whine too much, but once my aunt had to mime playing a violin when I was going on for awhile, heh.

And recently while talking to a daughter with a broken phone that fed back my own voice with a 1-second delay, I heard myself whining. Gah!

Anyone wanna hear/read about my lumbago now? 😆

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9 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

No thank you, I have my own. :-(

Are we still calling it sciatica these days?  
“Piriformis syndrome” is likely to elicit more interest than anyone really wants on the subject. 
And people never seem to take “pain in the butt” literally.  
Would “Lumbago” make them laugh?
Okay. 
I’ll stop now. 
I can see my aunt breaking out the violin.🎻 

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My pet peeve is the people who said they're quitting their job over work vaccine mandates because it wasn't FDA approved. Now that it is FDA approved they're quitting because they read that some horse de-wormer works better. It's always something. And honestly, I feel like Facebook has become unreadable due to the misinformation memes floating around. For the millionth time, don't take medicine meant for a horse!

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5 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

My pet peeve is the people who said they're quitting their job over work vaccine mandates because it wasn't FDA approved. Now that it is FDA approved they're quitting because they read that some horse de-wormer works better. It's always something. And honestly, I feel like Facebook has become unreadable due to the misinformation memes floating around. For the millionth time, don't take medicine meant for a horse!

Facebook. Not even once.

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48 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

My pet peeve is the people who said they're quitting their job over work vaccine mandates because it wasn't FDA approved. Now that it is FDA approved they're quitting because they read that some horse de-wormer works better. It's always something. And honestly, I feel like Facebook has become unreadable due to the misinformation memes floating around. For the millionth time, don't take medicine meant for a horse!

I want to point out to those people that the horse-dewormer was not approved for human use, but that violates one of my principles of life - you can’t fix stupid.

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Why the hell anyone would turn to Facebook for medical advice is truly beyond me. If people have legitimate concerns about any health issues related to the vaccines, that's what federal and state health sites are for. That's what doctors and nurses and medical experts are for. Ask them. This is really not that hard, people. 

 

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6 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

While everyone's experiences can vary, for me, I feel like the health-centric conversations can come from a bit of lonliness, or because folks with many or serious health conditions often have a very small world.  When your only social interactions are doctors/nurses/caregivers, perhaps they just find some comfort in talking with someone outside of that realm, even if the subject matter is the same.  At the end of the day, I feel people just are looking for some sense that people care about what is happening to/with them, and that their problems matter.  

I had these very same gripes in my 20's, 30's, 40's...about my parents and their contemporaries; constantly comparing notes about health issues.  Now that I have a husband with many health issues which have limited his/our ability to socialize as we used to, I do find myself discussing these things more than I ever thought I would.

I totally agree. I have had rheumatoid arthritis since I was 13 years old. I had 10 orthopedic surgeries in the last 12 years. For decades, No one in my life (including my parents) ever really understood the daily pain I had to deal with, but I just sucked it up.

Now that I am 57, I can now discuss medical challenges and pains with friends because they finally caught up with me 🤣

Funny story, Back in 2009, I was working on a project in West Palm Beach and my husband’s grandparents lived there, so I spent several weekends with them. 
One time, the nasty sister of my now late grandmother came over to get together. I had lost a lot of weight and she asked me if I always had a problem with my weight. Later on she was talking about all the medications she was on and I had been on all of them also 🤣🤣🤣

She really was horrible and I really pissed her off because I had been enduring pain my whole life and she just just a whiner who wanted attention. When they left, my grandfather said of his sister in law - she’s such a bitch.

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2 hours ago, Annber03 said:

Why the hell anyone would turn to Facebook for medical advice is truly beyond me. If people have legitimate concerns about any health issues related to the vaccines, that's what federal and state health sites are for. That's what doctors and nurses and medical experts are for. Ask them. This is really not that hard, people. 

 

I'm in a few "wellness" groups, and I've seen a lot of posts about it. Last year, it started with the list of supplements to take, and this year it's - I'm not sure I can go into it all. But they recommend sites where you can get a consultation and prescription for things like the ivermectin. The other night, I saw a post from someone who did all of this, followed the protocol, and still ended up in hospital, because of the covid. I personally know someone who was pushing ivermectin, too. It's so depressing. 

Oh, this is the peeves thread, and it is a big pet peeve of mine. I've got into too many arguments with people I know. I was hoping this Summer would be different, but I was wrong. I should have just avoided everyone. It should be easier online, but when you're pretty isolated, it's too easy, and too much of a habit formed (people you talk to, communities you're a part of, like this one). 

Edited by Anela
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She really was horrible and I really pissed her off because I had been enduring pain my whole life and she just just a whiner who wanted attention. When they left, my grandfather said of his sister in law - she’s such a bitch.

Sigh. Every family's got one. Why do some people have to be so nasty?

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2 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

Sigh. Every family's got one. Why do some people have to be so nasty?

My biggest pet peeve is probably plain meanness. I don't know why some people are so cruel, jump to believe the worst about others, use and abuse. I get that no one is perfect or nice 100% of the time, but there's no reason to be nasty or take advantage of anyone. 

I hope one good that that will come out of this horrible global pandemic is people softening up. Life is precious. You don't know how long anyone will be around. 

Edited by RealHousewife
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6 hours ago, Annber03 said:

Why the hell anyone would turn to Facebook for medical advice is truly beyond me. If people have legitimate concerns about any health issues related to the vaccines, that's what federal and state health sites are for. That's what doctors and nurses and medical experts are for. Ask them. This is really not that hard, people. 

 

I see this on Reddit all the time "I have this huge, red bump on my face & it really hurts, can anybody tell me what it is & how to get rid of it?" "I'm coughing up blood, can anyone recommend a good cough medicine?", "My eye has swollen to twice it's size, has anybody else had this?" I always think "WTF is wrong with you?????, go to the friggin" doctor!" I just don't get it, why do they think people on Reddit can help them?

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7 hours ago, Lady Whistleup said:

And honestly, I feel like Facebook has become unreadable due to the misinformation memes floating around. For the millionth time, don't take medicine meant for a horse!

WhatsApp is even worse among certain demographics. My parents and their friends (folks in their 60s and 70s) don't use Facebook, but they forward each other those stupid memes and videos all the time via WhatsApp, spreading them like wildfire. My parents are also bilingual, so they get double the misinformation. The most egregious so far has been "Israeli doctor cures COVID with lemon juice" from a Russian source.

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It's totally ridiculous.  There are numerous examples of patients - especially women - being dismissed as head cases when whatever is wrong with them doesn't show up in the standard battery of tests, and in those cases it can be good to seek out anecdotal evidence in order to investigate one's own mystery diagnosis situation and, armed with that additional data, connect with a doctor who'll do a deeper dive in such cases. 

The same is true of pet owners whose animals prove to be unusual cases and whose individual vet may not do a proper investigation.  Sometimes one has to be an advocate beyond being a patient/client.

But to reach for "what do y'all think" feedback on a general social media platform - in which the odds of someone with relevant experience, let alone expertise, are totally drowned out by uninformed/misinformed dolts - rather than consulting a medical professional is nuts.

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1 hour ago, RealHousewife said:

My biggest pet peeve is probably plain meanness. I don't know why some people are so cruel, jump to believe the worst about others, use and abuse. I get that no one is perfect or nice 100% of the time, but there's no reason to be nasty or take advantage of anyone. 

I hope one good that that will come out of this horrible global pandemic is people softening up. Life is precious. You don't know how long anyone will be around. 

I don't see it happening. I lost another friend or "friend" a couple of weeks ago. I disagreed with her one too many times (her conspiracy theories, and political things she was pushing - I can't mention them here). She turned vicious, attacked my mental health. A couple of people stood up for me, but I'm done. There should be a special place in hell, for anyone who messes with people's heads like this. 

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8 minutes ago, Anela said:

I don't see it happening. I lost another friend or "friend" a couple of weeks ago. I disagreed with her one too many times (her conspiracy theories, and political things she was pushing - I can't mention them here). She turned vicious, attacked my mental health. A couple of people stood up for me, but I'm done. There should be a special place in hell, for anyone who messes with people's heads like this. 

Aw, I'm so sorry honey. I agree, that's not a friend. Friends should take up for you, not attack you like that. 

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My biggest pet peeve is probably plain meanness. I don't know why some people are so cruel, jump to believe the worst about others, use and abuse. I get that no one is perfect or nice 100% of the time, but there's no reason to be nasty or take advantage of anyone. 

I think it's because they hate themselves. They're just miserable people.

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On 8/21/2021 at 5:01 PM, peacheslatour said:

Yeah, we didn't get much smoke this year. At least it's not as bad as last summer's three weeks in Hell. 2018 was a great summer. Perfect weather and  the ideal amount of rain.

smoke? Its really hot and humid in Texas right now I just wish it would rain already.

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5 minutes ago, Nicmar said:

smoke? Its really hot and humid in Texas right now I just wish it would rain already.

Yes, we get smoke coming in from wildfires all over the west, including British Columbia. Eastern WA ,especially has fires every summer and the smoke comes over the mountains and blankets the Seattle area.

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7 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Yes, we get smoke coming in from wildfires all over the west, including British Columbia. Eastern WA ,especially has fires every summer and the smoke comes over the mountains and blankets the Seattle area.

That's true, and it seems to have gotten worse in the past couple of years. Last summer there was a "week from hell" with AQI over 250. This summer the worst has been around 150, but that's still bad.

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Just now, chocolatine said:

That's true, and it seems to have gotten worse in the past couple of years. Last summer there was a "week from hell" with AQI over 250. This summer the worst has been around 150, but that's still bad.

It makes me sad. I used to look forward to summer but now it just means unbearable heat and unbreathable air.

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14 hours ago, Anela said:

I personally know someone who was pushing ivermectin, too. It's so depressing. 

@Anela, I feel your pain. There is someone who I really admired, I thought she was kind and smart and well-educated. I looked forward to her FB posts because they were positive and funny and sometimes enlightening. Then covid started and she became....well, kind of a nut. It has changed how I look at her now and I no longer follow her on FB because she is constantly posting misinformation and while she asks for others to be tolerant of her and her "freedom of choice" to not be vaccinated, she will chastise anyone who has chosen to be vaccinated for "being sheep." In her view you can only 'live and let live' as long as you do it her way. So sad.

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1 minute ago, BexKeps said:

and while she asks for others to be tolerant of her and her "freedom of choice" to not be vaccinated, she will chastise anyone who has chosen to be vaccinated for "being sheep." In her view you can only 'live and let live' as long as you do it her way. So sad.

Yeah, it's funny how the "freedom of choice" and "rights' thing only ever seems to go one way for people with this attitude, isn't it? 

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11 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

My biggest pet peeve is probably plain meanness. I don't know why some people are so cruel, jump to believe the worst about others, use and abuse. I get that no one is perfect or nice 100% of the time, but there's no reason to be nasty or take advantage of anyone. 

I hope one good that that will come out of this horrible global pandemic is people softening up. Life is precious. You don't know how long anyone will be around. 

I believe if you don’t agree with something someone says, say nothing.  I’ve gotten in a lot of trouble defending myself.  It’s hard, but it saves a lot of aggravation.

 

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41 minutes ago, BexKeps said:

@Anela, I feel your pain. There is someone who I really admired, I thought she was kind and smart and well-educated. I looked forward to her FB posts because they were positive and funny and sometimes enlightening. Then covid started and she became....well, kind of a nut. It has changed how I look at her now and I no longer follow her on FB because she is constantly posting misinformation and while she asks for others to be tolerant of her and her "freedom of choice" to not be vaccinated, she will chastise anyone who has chosen to be vaccinated for "being sheep." In her view you can only 'live and let live' as long as you do it her way. So sad.

I know someone like that. I have a friend who always seemed smart and knowledgeable. We both love ballet and often went to the ballet together. Since covid started she's been posting memes nonstop and one is nuttier than the last one. But if she wants to believe what she believes, whatever. The thing is she has gotten aggressive and come onto MY page and called me a sheep and said I was committing child abuse because I said that if kids (students) get the vaccine I give them a pass from homework for that day. She's pushing ivermectin too. It's crazy. 

That's another pet peeve of mine: when people now scream "child abuse" if you ask kids to wear a mask or vaccinate your child. Where did this come from?

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2 hours ago, Nicmar said:

smoke? Its really hot and humid in Texas right now I just wish it would rain already.

IMO, this has been two lousy summers all around.  A waste.  Couldn’t see relatives, couldn’t socialize with friends, no restaurants, etc.  Two years wasted.  No where to go.  I’m so used to be in the house I don’t even care if I stay home anymore.  As long as I have stuff to read.  And these boards of course.  At least we have some laughs.

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50 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

I have a friend who always seemed smart and knowledgeable. We both love ballet and often went to the ballet together.

My friend and I are runners, she is actually someone who got me into running and inspired me to live a healthier life. She usually posted about physical fitness and loving yourself no matter your fitness level but now she's off the rails. It really does make me sad because she was so motivating and positive about living life. 

57 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

I believe if you don’t agree with something someone says, say nothing.  I’ve gotten in a lot of trouble defending myself.  It’s hard, but it saves a lot of aggravation.

Yes - this exactly. 

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1 hour ago, kristen111 said:

I believe if you don’t agree with something someone says, say nothing.  I’ve gotten in a lot of trouble defending myself.  It’s hard, but it saves a lot of aggravation.

I live for aggravation.  😇

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