Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[Maharincess]

15 hours ago, topanga said:

 

These quote boxes that don't go away are annoying. 

In my own personal bathroom that only I use, I keep my toilet paper on a little shelf in front of the toilet.  The toilet paper holder is too close to the toilet and I can't bend very well so the shelf is perfect.   But I'm definitely an over the roll. I can see where the end is when it's on top. 

[backformore]

Toilet paper is all white now.   I'm old enough to remember when it actually came in colors and prints.  (I assume all that dye was determined to be unsafe).  Blue, pink, yellow toilet paper - facial tissues came that way too.   AND, some toilet paper was white with a delicate print.  On 2-ply paper, the print was on the outside of the roll.  Therefore, the way toilet paper is supposed to be hung is OVER, not under - because the outside is the front side.  I remember a "Dear Abby"  type of newspaper columnist that gave this answer a long time ago, and it made perfect sense to me.

[Jaded]

[NutMeg]

I may have inadvertently contributed to the toilet paper saga, and I DO agree that the way the pattern is visible is the best, but... where I Iive now, the paper toilet holder is situated BEHIND the toilet. No idea how that could have come to be but there it is. Therefore, my TP roll stands on a ledge, next to me, and I'm not affected at all by how it looks :).  

[janestclair]

I have the toilet paper sitting on a little stool in front of the toilet, because the holder thingie is too far away from the actual toilet, but if I did hang it. it would be over. Just because.   I remember colored toilet paper, but I've never seen green paper - only blue, pink and yellow.  

This actually ties into my peeve. Toilet paper has gotten super shitty lately, or at least the brand I've always used.  I've bought Angel Soft forever because it doesn't clog up my pipes like Charmin, and now it's like one ply bullshit paper, so I have to find another brand that doesn't suck but won't clog my pipes.

[auntlada]

Huh. The Angel Soft we buy is still two-ply.

[LJonEarth]

New pet peeve: People who sit and their driveways and idle their vehicles for an inordinate amount of time? My neighbor does it for 30 minutes at a time in the middle of the night. Who has money to waste gas like that? Are you having an NPR driveway moment? Why are you ruining our quiet neighborhood? Did you fall asleep? Is the passenger you're waiting for asleep inside? Aren't you going to be late for wherever you're going?

[JTMacc99]

It's probably because being alone in the car is better than either where the person just left or is going. Because sometimes people suck. 

[Jaded]

19 hours ago, janestclair said:

This actually ties into my peeve. Toilet paper has gotten super shitty lately, or at least the brand I've always used.  I've bought Angel Soft forever because it doesn't clog up my pipes like Charmin, and now it's like one ply bullshit paper, so I have to find another brand that doesn't suck but won't clog my pipes.

My usual TP Quilted Northern in the blue pack has gotten shitty too. The last pack I got had two rolls where the indent pattern wasn't as deep and the 2 ply sheets were coming apart which made the them to hard to use as actual TP. I posted on their FB page and am expecting a coupon or two. They sent an email in responsponse to my FB post asking for additional details. So I'm going to list the additional stuff they want when people lodge complaints in addition to what the actual problem is. They want the name of the product, proof of purchase code (not the bar code), core code (located inside the cardboard roll), how much of the TP is left and where it was purchased. 

[bilgistic]

19 hours ago, janestclair said:

Toilet paper has gotten super shitty lately

So to speak.

[Sun-Bun]

3 hours ago, JTMacc99 said:

It's probably because being alone in the car is better than either where the person just left or is going. Because sometimes people suck. 

I remember going to a few jobs in my younger years and spending as much time as possible in the job site parking lot sitting in my car blaring my music and preparing myself mentally for a long day of soul-crushing professional torture. I'd literally be sick to my stomach as I sat there blaring the car stereo while preparing myself for 8 hours of sheer gloom and doom. 

On the flipside, I remember having several roommate situations that made sitting in the car enjoying music outside our house somewhat more bearable for sanity's sake.

[Blergh]

I don't mind folks idling in their own driveways so much as folks who idle in parking spaces whilst others are I am in urgent need of a parking spot and there's no other spot for blocks around. It's one thing to waste one's money and gas in one's own actual driveway but IMO, it's extremely selfish and inconsiderate to do so when others are in need.

[janestclair]

On 10/14/2016 at 4:27 PM, auntlada said:

Huh. The Angel Soft we buy is still two-ply.

You're right, it's still two ply. It just feels like one because they're so thin. It breaks up into little bits when you use it.  I have like 5 more rolls to use.  

 

6 hours ago, bilgistic said:

So to speak.

Hah! Didn't even occur to me.  

[auntlada]

1 hour ago, janestclair said:

You're right, it's still two ply. It just feels like one because they're so thin. It breaks up into little bits when you use it.  I have like 5 more rolls to use. 

Ah. I misunderstood. Sorry.

[topanga]

On 10/14/2016 at 3:49 PM, janestclair said:

This actually ties into my peeve. Toilet paper has gotten super shitty lately, or at least the brand I've always used.  I've bought Angel Soft forever because it doesn't clog up my pipes like Charmin, and now it's like one ply bullshit paper, so I have to find another brand that doesn't suck but won't clog my pipes.

I use Scott Extra Soft. I know it sounds like it would be feel like sand paper on your nether regions, but it doesn't. It's actually quite soft. It's also sturdy, and it does the job. Toilet paper like Charmin and Northern are way to soft for me. I feel like I'm wiping my butt with a wad of cotton. 

 

On 10/14/2016 at 3:20 AM, backformore said:

Toilet paper is all white now.   I'm old enough to remember when it actually came in colors and prints.  (I assume all that dye was determined to be unsafe).  Blue, pink, yellow toilet paper - facial tissues came that way too.   AND, some toilet paper was white with a delicate print.  On 2-ply paper, the print was on the outside of the roll.  Therefore, the way toilet paper is supposed to be hung is OVER, not under - because the outside is the front side.  I remember a "Dear Abby"  type of newspaper columnist that gave this answer a long time ago, and it made perfect sense to me.

I remember those colors. Some of it used to be scented, too. 

[backformore]

This isn't really a pet peeve, as much as a bitch about how people suck.

This person and I used to work together.   We didn't work closely, we were cordial, but not really friends, just friendly enough to joke around at work occasionally. Neither one of us are still at that place.   She contacted me recently to "catch up".  Hi, how are you, heard about your new job, that's great, do you miss the old place,  we should meet for coffee, or lunch, I'd love to see you,    blah blah.   THEN - hey, I need a little favor.

I have credentials she doesn't.  In order for her to move on to another level of credentialing, she needs someone to say they trained and supervised her in certain areas.  SHe wants me to say I did that.   She and I both know it's not true, and that I'm not the kind of person who takes risks with MY credentials by falsifying a document.  She worked with me long enough to know I'm a "by the book"  person.  So she asks me this favor,   says it's a little thing, just sign a paper,   I say no, sorry, can't do it.  And that's it.  OVER.  SHe had ne desire to catch up, didn't REALLY care how I was doing, didn't want to chat or have lunch.  Unless, of course, I was willing to endanger my credentials by signing something that would be fraudulent. 

I didn't expect anything else, when we worked together I had no desire to be friends with her, so it's not like my feelings are hurt.   it's only that she thought I was so stupid that I would do this.  OR that I would, I don't know, fall for this offer of friendship, or think she was sincere, when it was so obvious she wanted to use me. 

Edited October 16, 2016 by backformore

[bilgistic]

This has been a week of shitty people, no? I had a not-really-similar-but-related thing happen.

Ten years ago, I worked with a woman and we became friends. She went to another job and I stayed at the then-workplace. We stayed close off and on. I did some freelance work for her here and there, especially when I was out of full-time work in 2009-2013ish. Things happened in our friendship, long story short, and we fell out of touch. I hadn't talked to her in two-plus years.

She called me out of the blue this week wanting some work done. Sorry Charlie, but I work overtime now, so no time or desire to work on my time off on something else, and working on something for her is a conflict of interest (her company is a client of ours). I asked her the parameters of the project, telling her I'd likely have to give it to some else I could trust, and  :: crickets chirping ::

Seriously, screw off with that.

Edited October 16, 2016 by bilgistic

[StatisticalOutlier]

Bagels.  I like either plain or fruit ones like blueberry or cinnamon raisin.  But they always have random areas that taste like onion or other savory flavors.  Is it the slicer or knife that carries the residue?  Why does it have to be this way?

[bilgistic]

Wouldn't you know my talking about her brought her forth. You wouldn't believe the scope of this project. I think I'm just going to tell her it's a conflict of interest for me or my collegue to work on it. I'm baffled as to why HER OWN COMPANY has no one that will/can do it.

People exhaust me, and it makes me angry that they do. My introversion and social anxiety is SO BAD, and I spend the entire weekend holed up at home recovering from a week of humanity and preparing for the next week of dealing with them. I'm medicated to the gills. I wish it wasn't this way.

8 minutes ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Bagels.  I like either plain or fruit ones like blueberry or cinnamon raisin.  But they always have random areas that taste like onion or other savory flavors.  Is it the slicer or knife that carries the residue?  Why does it have to be this way?

I know exactly what you mean. I dislike onion bagels. I'm guessing it's the slicer. At Panera, they throw them all in that terrifying guillotine shaft, and I imagine that thing is encrusted with bagel residue.

[ABay]

@bilgistic, it's OK to say no. A friend would understand that it's a lot to ask and you already have a lot on your plate. And if she isn't/doesn't, then the hell with her. Is this like @Sandman87 (or was it @JTMacc99) a few months ago where we can collectively shoulder your guilt or anxiety about it? Count me in.

[Sandman87]

I got a notification that "ABay mentioned you in a topic: Pet Peeves ", and my first thought was that I had become a pet peeve...

On Friday, October 14, 2016 at 0:49 PM, janestclair said:

This actually ties into my peeve. Toilet paper has gotten super shitty lately, or at least the brand I've always used.  I've bought Angel Soft forever because it doesn't clog up my pipes like Charmin, and now it's like one ply bullshit paper, so I have to find another brand that doesn't suck but won't clog my pipes.

There's nothing quite like unintentionally giving one's self a prostate exam first thing in the morning while one is still half asleep because the damned paper self-destructed without warning.

[backformore]

The bagel thing - I think it's because of the seeds.  I like the seeded, savory bagels.  But I also like the sweet ones, and I agree that they can be ruined by contamination.   An onion bagel has a bunch of finely chopped onions clinging to the top of the bagel.  An Everything bagel has onion, seeds and chopped garlic.   An isolated  poppy seed or sesame seed is not going to taste like much.  But, a flake of garlic is going to ruin the taste of a cinnamon bagel.   I used to buy bagels by the dozen, and I always asked for the onion ones to be packed separately. 

If this happens to you at Panera, I suggest you contact Panera by email.  They'll likely send you a gift card. 

[MargeGunderson]

2 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Bagels.  I like either plain or fruit ones like blueberry or cinnamon raisin.  But they always have random areas that taste like onion or other savory flavors.  Is it the slicer or knife that carries the residue?  Why does it have to be this way?

At my local Panarea I noticed that the everything and onion bagels were in the baskets above the cinnamon crunch and cinnamon raisin bagels. The seeds and onion bits were falling on the sweet bagels! I mentioned it to the person at the counter and the next day they were switched. No more random onion flavor in my cinnamon bagel!

[bilgistic]

There should be only plain, whole wheat and sesame seed bagels on the top!

[bilgistic]

I told my former coworker I couldn't do the project because it's a conflict of interest, and she took it well. Good lord, I was really anxious over that. Anxiety is a bitch.

[zxy556575]

Aw, crumb. The garlic and onion bits, the seeds, the cinnamon, the blueberries. Now I have to drive to Panera in the morning.

[TattleTeeny]

Quote

My ex FIL was seriously OCD. 

Quote

My husband isn't quite OCD, but his closet organizational skills annoy me. 

Let me preface by saying I am not offended or anything...I swear! But are we using "OCD" in here colloquially or literally? I realize that it's become common slang for neatness but I also wonder when/if someone is referring to the actual condition, of which fastidiousness in not necessarily a symptom (for example, I've been diagnosed with OCD and I am also a neat person but the two are not connected). 

Oh, E.T.A.--the reason I brought this up was not to "shame"! I did it mainly because I find the topic interesting (I'd totally read a forum here about it, in fact). Maybe sometimes peeve-inducing, depending on who is using the term; if I already think you're dumb, then I feel mad, haha!

Edited October 17, 2016 by TattleTeeny

[topanga]

1 hour ago, TattleTeeny said:

Let me preface by saying I am not offended or anything...I swear! But are we using "OCD" in here colloquially or literally? I realize that it's become common slang for neatness but I also wonder when/if someone is referring to the actual condition, of which fastidiousness in not necessarily a symptom (for example, I've been diagnosed with OCD and I am also a neat person but the two are not connected). 

Oh, E.T.A.--the reason I brought this up was not to "shame"! I did it mainly because I find the topic interesting (I'd totally read a forum here about it, in fact). Maybe sometimes peeve-inducing, depending on who is using the term; if I already think you're dumb, then I feel mad, haha!

You're right. And I'm as guilty as anyone else. When medical terms are used colloquially, that does offend some people. People say they're OCD, ADD, that they're developing Alzheimer's, they're blind (simply because they need to wear glasses), manic, etc. It wasn't too long ago that people might call themselves retarded because they had trouble understanding a concept or learning a new skill. 

[TattleTeeny]

Honestly, while it bugs others (and I can't fault them for it), it really makes no difference to me, especially if the person doing it does indeed "better" (that seems totally backwards of me, I know). I am as guilty of it as anyone else--I admit that I will totally call myself "retarded" in the company of my friends or other people who know what's a joke and what is not. Yikes, it's hard to articulate where my personal "line" is in matters like this!

[janestclair]

Conversely, I don't like it when my everything bagel tastes like cinnamon raisin.  Separate flavors should be separate, period, with a separate bag, and a separate slicer to prevent contamination.  Also, everything bagels should never include caraway seeds.  Those things are vile. 

2 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Let me preface by saying I am not offended or anything...I swear! But are we using "OCD" in here colloquially or literally? I realize that it's become common slang for neatness but I also wonder when/if someone is referring to the actual condition, of which fastidiousness in not necessarily a symptom (for example, I've been diagnosed with OCD and I am also a neat person but the two are not connected). 

Oh, E.T.A.--the reason I brought this up was not to "shame"! I did it mainly because I find the topic interesting (I'd totally read a forum here about it, in fact). Maybe sometimes peeve-inducing, depending on who is using the term; if I already think you're dumb, then I feel mad, haha!

I'm guilty of doing it too.  I'm trying to switch that out with anal retentive, because it's not an actual medical diagnosis.  I've referred to myself as a spaz on many occasions, and one time, someone got offended because there are people who have a medical condition. *raises hand*   I mean it's not like I advertise it, but yeah, I am literally spastic.   I'm guilty of using retarded with my friends too, but it does actually mean slow. I would never call someone with Down snydrome that.

[TattleTeeny]

Ugh, I made a reply and it disappeared. Anyway, for me, it's almost less of a staunch across-the-board dedication to political correctness than it is a desire not to hurt the feelings of someone I don't know. 

Edited October 17, 2016 by TattleTeeny

[topanga]

9 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

Ugh, I made a reply and it disappeared. Anyway, for me, it's almost less of a staunch across-the-board dedication to political correctness than it is a desire not to hurt the feelings of someone I don't know. 

Exactly. Do I think it minimizes the seriousness of a medical condition if I use a term colloquially? In most cases, no. But I also know that if someone with obsessive-compulsive disorder asked me not to call my ultra-organized husband OCD, I'd stop because I wouldn't want to offend or hurt that person. 

 

 

25 minutes ago, janestclair said:

I'm guilty of doing it too.  I'm trying to switch that out with anal retentive, because it's not an actual medical diagnosis.

Ha. Don't tell that to a Freudian!

[Bastet]

"Retarded" has such an ugly, hurtful history I never use it and don't like to hear it, but one of my friends uses it - as a synonym for stupid - a lot.  I've told her it bothers me, and she catches herself afterward and apologizes, but she never remembers not to say it in front of me in the first place. 

Simply for the sake of accuracy, I'm pretty consistent about saying I'm particular about something rather than tossing around the term OCD, but I'm regularly guilty of referring to my ever-worsening eyesight as "going blind."

[auntlada]

3 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Let me preface by saying I am not offended or anything...I swear! But are we using "OCD" in here colloquially or literally? I realize that it's become common slang for neatness but I also wonder when/if someone is referring to the actual condition, of which fastidiousness in not necessarily a symptom (for example, I've been diagnosed with OCD and I am also a neat person but the two are not connected). 

Oh, E.T.A.--the reason I brought this up was not to "shame"! I did it mainly because I find the topic interesting (I'd totally read a forum here about it, in fact). Maybe sometimes peeve-inducing, depending on who is using the term; if I already think you're dumb, then I feel mad, haha!

I often say I have never been diagnosed as OCD. Of course, I've never been examined for it either. I doubt I would be diagnosed as OCD, but I do think that I have tendencies in that direction. For instance, before I go to bed at night, I feed the cats, then check the doors and then check the rooms on the way to my bedroom. I do it in the same order every night. I could make myself do it in a different order, but it would bug me. I just have a routine I go through before bed. And when I check the doors, I can't just look at the lock and see it is locked, even though that's perfectly possible. I have to touch the lock. Again, I can make myself not do it, but it is harder to go to sleep. It's not impossible, but it is harder. If I get up in the night for anything, I want to check again. Sometimes I do, but sometimes I make myself not do it because I am afraid of becoming OCD by not stopping myself. I'm pretty sure it doesn't work that way, but just in case, while I still can stop myself from doing things like that, I want to do so.

My closet, though, is a big old mess.

I do sometimes say I'm blind without my glasses, which is possibly not technically true as I am not legally blind, but I really can't see anything without them. My vision is correctable with glasses, but without them I wouldn't recognize someone three feet in front of me if I didn't know who it was. My optometrist did once say (I think I recall correctly) that if I had tunnel vision I would be legally blind. But since I can see peripherally, I am not.

Edited October 17, 2016 by auntlada

[Bastet]

The first time I saw an episode of Monk (in which the titular character has OCD), he was asking the dry cleaner to fix his shirt because when she'd sewn a button back on, she'd sewn it with the stitching in parallel lines, while the other buttons where all sewn in an X (or vice versa).  The audience is supposed to laugh at him, and his obsession with it was certainly over the top, but I just turned to my aunt and asked, "Well, who wouldn't be bugged by that?" 

I notice if people put their switch plate or outlet covers on without making sure the screws are tightened so they're facing the same way.  The difference between Monk and me is I don't have to go grab a screwdriver and fix them (although I make sure mine are all aligned). 

Edited October 19, 2016 by Bastet

[JTMacc99]

OCD is an anxiety related thing. I am watching for it with one of my children. Both my brother had issues related to it at some point earlier in our lives. Never Monk level for me, but pretty bad for my brother. 

[zxy556575]

I think most (?) people are persnickety about certain things, like I always set the TV volume on a multiple of 5 and all drawers must be kept closed. I'm also very particular about my computer interface and browser preferences. But there's no word for those little quirks and at the time time, I'm completely laissez faire about hundreds of other things. I need to be more aware of joking about having OCD or ADHD, etc. because it can be disrespectful or diminishing to others, so I appreciate the reminder.

[Bastet]

Quote

all drawers must be kept closed

Ooh, another peeve - living with people who fail to do that.  Thankfully, I've lived alone a long time now and will hopefully never cohabitate again, but my mom is prone to leaving drawers just slightly open rather than pushing them all the way closed, and my friend's fiancé leaves kitchen cupboards wide open.  It looks like poltergeist have been there. 

[TattleTeeny]

Quote

I often say I have never been diagnosed as OCD. Of course, I've never been examined for it either. I doubt I would be diagnosed as OCD, but I do think that I have tendencies in that direction. For instance, before I go to bed at night, I feed the cats, then check the doors and then check the rooms on the way to my bedroom. I do it in the same order every night. I could make myself do it in a different order, but it would bug me. I just have a routine I go through before bed. And when I check the doors, I can't just look at the lock and see it is locked, even though that's perfectly possible. I have to touch the lock. Again, I can make myself not do it, but it is harder to go to sleep. It's not impossible, but it is harder. If I get up in the night for anything, I want to check again. Sometimes I do, but sometimes I make myself not do it because I am afraid of becoming OCD by not stopping myself. I'm pretty sure it doesn't work that way, but just in case, while I still can stop myself from doing things like that, I want to do so.

Well, you could argue that we have systems and routines, however quirky, simply because they work for us and our schedules and lives. Why change a routine if it's effective, you know? It's when deviating from that routine causes actual anxiety (like anxiety that doesn't seem to allow you to make yourself not do the thing), or when the "C" part of OCD begins to take center stage, that a problem can arise. You're probably just set in something that works for you...or maybe everyone has a touch of it in there somewhere. 

Luckily, I'm still at a...level? category? (I don't even what you'd call it) that is manageable without meds, though I also don't doubt that my doctor would hesitate to prescribe any if I felt like I wanted them. It's definitely a thing I am advised to keep track of though, and it can accelerate the closer a woman gets to menopause. I have turned around and gone home to see if the stove is off or a window is closed--and the former was completely irrational; the latter is an issue with our cats*, so not irrational itself, but the level of stress it can sometimes cause me might be. I do tend to get more anxious about neatness and order if I am already stressed out about something else (that's really the only time the neatness part shows up; like I said, neatness is my natural setting/preference anyway. I don't feel any real anxiety about it on normal days). I swear, I am fairly laid-back about many things (not so much with others) despite the examples above. 

* My real issue is labeled "intrusive thoughts," and a lot of that is focused on the well-being of our pets and animal welfare in general. Again I say "luckily" because intrusive thoughts can become unbearable and very disturbing to some OCD sufferers; mine are, at this point, merely upsetting and cause me sometimes to fixate to a point that I can't concentrate on anything else. So far, I am able to rein myself in--and if checking on the stove helps that reining, I just check the stove...and then, at best, mock myself for the rest of the day and, at worst, feel guilt for wasting time and being dumb, especially if I am with another person. I'm supposed to stop myself from doing something that could be considered irrational, chill for a couple of minutes, do the thing or don't, and make a mental note of how I react/feel about it.

Edited October 17, 2016 by TattleTeeny

[TattleTeeny]

UGH, I am going to murder this website--second time today that I edited a post only to have the edits disappear.

[auntlada]

31 minutes ago, lordonia said:

I think most (?) people are persnickety about certain things, like I always set the TV volume on a multiple of 5 and all drawers must be kept closed. I'm also very particular about my computer interface and browser preferences. But there's no word for those little quirks and at the time time, I'm completely laissez faire about hundreds of other things. I need to be more aware of joking about having OCD or ADHD, etc. because it can be disrespectful or diminishing to others, so I appreciate the reminder.

I like volume levels to be on even numbers. I have a vague feeling that it is bad luck to have the level on an odd number even while I know that is a dumb idea. I used to have to tear the toilet paper until it was even on a perforation without part of a piece hanging off. I would tear the piece off and put it in the toilet or the trash can depending on where the other half was. They had to be together. Again, it was bad luck not to. I broke myself of it by just forcing myself to leave it. Sometimes I still have to stop myself.

My husband leaves drawers not quite shut (with clothes sticking out and blocking the shutting) and cabinet drawers wide open. I am not sure he's noticed me following him around shutting things and turning off lights. The lights thing is very reasonable, though. Lights left on for no reason cost money.

[Treehugger]

3 hours ago, topanga said:

You're right. And I'm as guilty as anyone else. When medical terms are used colloquially, that does offend some people. People say they're OCD, ADD, that they're developing Alzheimer's, they're blind (simply because they need to wear glasses), manic, etc. It wasn't too long ago that people might call themselves retarded because they had trouble understanding a concept or learning a new skill. 

I shouldn't be snickering about pet peeves, but the comments about medical terms have me howling.  I have a condition called alopecia, which has left me with about 10% of my hair all sticking out in strange tufts.  It's horrifying for a woman to lose her hair and be stuck with what I call a Frankenstein head.  One day my daughter and I went through a drive-thru, and I was driving.  The man working the drive-thru window was friendly, asked how our day was going, commented about the weather, etc.  I asked if he was having a good day.  Mind you, this whole time he's been working the cash register, getting drinks, and hasn't looked my way.  He responded to my inquiry about whether he was having a good day with an answer along the lines of "it was a busy, busy day, but I haven't started tearing my hair out yet".  At that point he leaned down to take my money and he sees my freakishly bald head.  The poor man didn't know what to say, and I could tell that he wanted to apologize.

My daughter and I have self-deprecating humor, and we knew better than to look at one another after his comment about not tearing out his hair.  It was all we could do to maintain our composure and not make him even more uncomfortable.  I managed to drive away, put my window up really fast, and then my daughter and I completely lost it and began laughing like banshees.   So no matter how careful we are with medical language, we're at times going to trip up.  I try to give others the benefit of the doubt, and this was one of those infrequent times I've been able to laugh about this stupid disease.  So this really hasn't been a pet peeve, but I wanted to share my enjoyment of a crazy situation.

[auntlada]

That's a good story. (That sounds like I think you are lying. I don't mean it that way. I just thought it was funny.)

Edited October 17, 2016 by auntlada
Explaining myself

[ABay]

@TattleTeeny, for intrusive thoughts I know are going to haunt me, like did I lock the front door, I say out loud "I have checked ___." That seems to help.

What I can't stop are bad memories that randomly pop into my head. Something stupid or embarrassing or hurtful that I did, sometimes decades ago. Sometimes I feel like if I didn't have bad memories, I'd have none at all.

[TattleTeeny]

Yes, that too here! A lot of what-iffery too. Even though I know logically that there isn't anything I can do now, the thoughts will sometimes keep me from thinking about anything else until I create some kind of...not quite penance, really, but a thing I need to do to "make up for" it, e.g., "Did I not notice quickly enough that my last cat was having health issues? What if I could have done more back then?" results in more time volunteering at the animal shelter or making a donation to an animal sanctuary. Not that those are bad for me to do, obviously, but it comes out of a compulsion that can't be quieted.

Edited October 18, 2016 by TattleTeeny

[Maharincess]

5 hours ago, topanga said:

 

What annoys the hell out of me is how people say "I'm OCD" or I have/haven't been diagnosed "as" OCD.  You can't BE obsessive compulsive disorder, you can have it or be diagnosed as having it but you can't be a disorder.  

[auntlada]

I've known a few people that I thought could be a disorder. Life would have been easier if they had been because I could have sought treatment for them.

[TattleTeeny]

Luckily for me, all my friends are issue-riddled kooks in their own unique ways!

Edited October 18, 2016 by TattleTeeny

[backformore]

7 hours ago, auntlada said:

I often say I have never been diagnosed as OCD. Of course, I've never been examined for it either. I doubt I would be diagnosed as OCD, but I do think that I have tendencies in that direction. For instance, before I go to bed at night, I feed the cats, then check the doors and then check the rooms on the way to my bedroom. I do it in the same order every night. I could make myself do it in a different order, but it would bug me. I just have a routine I go through before bed. And when I check the doors, I can't just look at the lock and see it is locked, even though that's perfectly possible. I have to touch the lock. Again, I can make myself not do it, but it is harder to go to sleep. It's not impossible, but it is harder. If I get up in the night for anything, I want to check again. Sometimes I do, but sometimes I make myself not do it because I am afraid of becoming OCD by not stopping myself. I'm pretty sure it doesn't work that way, but just in case, while I still can stop myself from doing things like that, I want to do so.

It's not really OCD unless the intrusive behaviors/thoughts interfere with your life.  For example - if you check to make sure all the doors are locked before you go to work, that's just being careful.  If you doubt yourself and have to circle back and re-check, then you're having some anxiety that day.   If you then get halfway to work and are plagued with the idea that when you thought you were locking the door the second time, it was already locked, so you actually UNlocked it, and then you have to go back home, or worry about it all day long  - that is on the road to  OCD behavior.  Especially if you end up being late for work because of it. 

One trick is to say out loud what you're doing.  Like saying "locked"  for a door or "off"  for a light.  That way, you're more likely to remember that you did it.  I don't take medication on a regular basis.  If I do have to take something for bronchitis or sinusitis, I find it hard to recall if I took the pill or not.  I'm worried that I forgot, and worried that I DID take it, so if I take it now I will have double-dosed.  I often end up counting out all the pills in the bottle, and subtracting the number of days, to try to figure out if I took one or not.     Saying "taking my pill" out loud when I take it,   helps cement it in my mind.   If I use my curling iron or flatiron on my hair, I say "Unplugged"  as I take the plug out, so I know for sure that the house won't burn down. 

[TattleTeeny]

My doctor told me that OCD has connections with childhood strep throat. And something or other about basal ganglia.