Small Talk: About Big People

[auntjess]

Fashion reporter Robin Givhan on plus-size fashion.


https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/style/what-kind-of-message-is-fashion-trying-to-send-plus-size-women/2018/11/27/1af35270-f266-11e8-bc79-68604ed88993_story.html?utm_term=.790b8f01cf8c

Edited November 28, 2018 by auntjess

[AZChristian]

3 hours ago, auntjess said:

Fashion reporter Robin Givhan on plus-size fashion.


https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/style/what-kind-of-message-is-fashion-trying-to-send-plus-size-women/2018/11/27/1af35270-f266-11e8-bc79-68604ed88993_story.html?utm_term=.790b8f01cf8c

We've seen pictures on THIS board of a size 24 woman in skimpy clothes.  She'll be vying for the model's job.

[cherenkov]

3 hours ago, auntjess said:

Fashion reporter Robin Givhan on plus-size fashion.


https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/style/what-kind-of-message-is-fashion-trying-to-send-plus-size-women/2018/11/27/1af35270-f266-11e8-bc79-68604ed88993_story.html?utm_term=.790b8f01cf8c

No matter how much some may wish, two things are apparent:

Being fit is sexier than being fat.

Being fat is the result of choices.

[kar328]

6 hours ago, auntjess said:

Fashion reporter Robin Givhan on plus-size fashion.


https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/style/what-kind-of-message-is-fashion-trying-to-send-plus-size-women/2018/11/27/1af35270-f266-11e8-bc79-68604ed88993_story.html?utm_term=.790b8f01cf8c

I'm seriously doubting the size 24. I was a 22/24 at 5'2" and 248 lbs and nowhere near that big. The article did make me smile in that some of the size ranges used by some designers would be too big for me at a current 4/6. That's mind boggling after being morbidly obese for my whole life. 

[3girlsforus]

I would just love to see consistency in sizes. Since I’m tall I have to order most of my clothes and constantly guessing at sizes because there is no consistency drives me nuts. I ordered a pair of jeans that were a regular but ‘long’ length. They fit but then I found out the company made the exact same jeans in tall which was a bit longer, which I need, and  has a longer rise because tall is for tall people rather than just long which is just long in the leg. So I ordered the tall in the same size. The waist in the tall jeans was 2 1/2 inches smaller than the same size, same style jeans in long. WTF???  Everywhere else fit but the waist was so tight. The waist shouldn’t be affected at all by tall vs regular. I’ve had identical pants in two different colors fit differently. Women’s clothing sizing is just screwed up. 

As far as the plus size clothing, I think it would be nice if plus size clothing had more style and shape. It’s not impossible to do. I also think we need to stop calling size 10 and 12 plus size. That’s crazy.  But I also don’t think it’s necessary to have enormous women model for plus size clothing and they certainly don’t need to be basically  naked. I thought the woman in the black dress looked good and would attract women to the dress. That is the job of the model/advertisement. She isn’t super thin but she’s well dressed and looks put together. Women don’t have to be a size 2 to do that. If a clothing manufacturer/designer wants to make good clothes for large people like that woman in the white (size 20+) they can and should do that but make the clothes to flatter as much as possible. Don’t model 1/2 naked fat people. Model women looking the best they can look. That should be true for any size. We’ve all watched enough What Not To Wear to know that clothes that fit and have the right shape can make anyone look better. So do that for plus size women. 

[ClareWalks]

The only place my tall ass can find jeans in a store is Old Navy, which is vanity sized to hell so I feel super slim there! Agree that tall sizes should leave waist and hips the same.

[3girlsforus]

6 minutes ago, ClareWalks said:

The only place my tall ass can find jeans in a store is Old Navy, which is vanity sized to hell so I feel super slim there! Agree that tall sizes should leave waist and hips the same.

Before I lost weight I wore Old Navy jeans but for some reason they don’t fit right anymore. Too big in some places too small in others. Ick. I finally ended up getting Lee and Levi’s from Amazon so now I own two pair of pants LOL. 

[Colleenna]

4 hours ago, AZChristian said:

We've seen pictures on THIS board of a size 24 woman in skimpy clothes.  She'll be vying for the model's job.

Twit might be a size 24 if she lost 90# ... At my heaviest, I weighed 275 (5'6") and was "stress testing" the seams of a size 26. 

[Colleenna]

Speaking of clothes.... I'm having a problem wrapping my head around my size change. Several times now, I've bought clothes in "my size," from clothing retailers I've bought from before, only to get them home and discover that they were two sizes too big. I guess I need to dig out the measuring tape and figure out what size I am now. 

[3girlsforus]

8 hours ago, Colleenna said:

Speaking of clothes.... I'm having a problem wrapping my head around my size change. Several times now, I've bought clothes in "my size," from clothing retailers I've bought from before, only to get them home and discover that they were two sizes too big. I guess I need to dig out the measuring tape and figure out what size I am now. 

I am having this problem too. I also can’t figure out if things actually look good or if it’s just better than when I was heavier. I still have weight to lose so I worry that I don’t actually look good, I just don’t look as bad. 

[Tosia]

I've learned the hard way that you have to try on everything you're planning to buy in the store.  Too many wasted trips back to change sizes.  Recently I bought skinny black jeans and tried them on,  A week later after wearing them out for about 2 hours, the waist/stomach area proved to be too loose, and they were boot cut, and not as skinny near the ankles like I really wanted.  My mistake,  so I returned them and got a better fitting pair.  No compunction about returning them, cuz my money is important to me. And Kohls is very forgiving. 

It's not always the size; it's the style that may be wrong/right/  I have to set aside time to try on jeans/pants at the store cuz I've been burned before.  And even then, based on my above experience, I really have got to be more mindful in the dressing room. And not tired or stressed.  

[Pachengala]

Since a lot of us seem to be interested in the mania that is Scientology, I just wanted to recommend one of my favorite podcasts, Oh No Ross and Carrie, which did a multi-part investigation in the 'church,' basically joining then eventually getting blacklisted. Like, literally, on a list, with their pictures. It's bonkers and amazing, and I definitely recommend it for people like me, who can't learn enough about our Clam friends. 

[Me from ME]

It has been a while since I bought them but I have several pairs of jeans by Christopher Blue (not Christopher Banks which sometimes shows up in a Google search).  There are various leg styles and rises but once you find the one that fits well you can order them in a variety of fabrics and have the same fit. Some of the fabrics are dressy e.g. velvet but there are also choices in denim and corduroy. Hmmm. Now I have got to go get some more, I forgot how much I loved them.

[Me from ME]

I tried several styles on in a brick and mortar store but thought they were out of my budget even though they were really comfortable as well as flattering. I left the area and then regretted not buying a pair. Found them on line and they fit exactly the same. Juku advertises that they have a high rise but they aren't Mom jeans and that one is my favorite although I have a few others. I think they do have vanity sizing though but Size 4 is my go to.

[TurtlePower]

On 11/28/2018 at 7:41 PM, ClareWalks said:

The only place my tall ass can find jeans in a store is Old Navy, which is vanity sized to hell so I feel super slim there! Agree that tall sizes should leave waist and hips the same.

Have you tried Boot Barn? They sell jeans by waist/inseam. The inseams are as long as 34 and it almost feels like they cater to taller women, since most of the inseams are 34. The jeans are kind of pricey, but a good pair of Miss Me lasts years and the fit is amazing. If you're longer than a 34 inseam, well, yeah that's gotta be rough! 

[SevenCostanza]

On 11/29/2018 at 12:12 PM, Pachengala said:

Since a lot of us seem to be interested in the mania that is Scientology, I just wanted to recommend one of my favorite podcasts, Oh No Ross and Carrie, which did a multi-part investigation in the 'church,' basically joining then eventually getting blacklisted. Like, literally, on a list, with their pictures. It's bonkers and amazing, and I definitely recommend it for people like me, who can't learn enough about our Clam friends. 

I just finished reading "Beyond Belief" by Jenna Miscavige Hill.  She's David's niece, she talks about Shelly a lot in the book, sounds like she was kind of a bitch. 

[auntjess]

A plus size event in Times Square, underwear and bathing suits, but no Whit.
And none of these people are close to her size, except one guy.
This is from Facebook, and I don't know how to detach it, but I think you should be able to see it.
https://www.facebook.com/aol/posts/2324630804226918?__xts__[0]=68.ARCzZQFKgI6t8f__hecEqQmeTOpQI_pvy4m--XgeqycAKbLXoqZ4s5RdODoI0g7sq_ULs7kje26_QBpjwU7sGzcNvrx0boOF2zcMEa6kutbhi5RZZzLih6I-xnmb7ElUyBHxGvYpcYKIME71NkcP_8EwPXGzHarCcZUzGE8liheYILkYxHWC2sj6FpmbYvik8ho138OH26caYWpbXjjLvXwx88fOmxsK1LXu36RKvcS213GZj84g2ct4em_gZfBNQ2fbAOwSEA2NDa5XHpvPM61C53ZXCfL4Fu_QQYjgbywJ-I0yrSV9DhcN0R7RVlIlGpVLy9PLz3ltH9ZqY6cV9ml9HeMaz-9OAamUhtX9dJZQXvKBzH3zCpRuympz-reYMi5RzMRFm2Q9JZ281ZChSdpBj2ZqdqAPsIyrGKz_r3Dbabs1T0wXT5M27m23Kw6grPadXis_zZ99rb56jZ9J4KANvSJsjRZdxGiFOcFBALH6RyRC4TogxUeYQtSwdYTWRG25eN6wDt2iok8hiYvjCS9uX0c&__tn__=C-R

 

[Yeah No]

19 minutes ago, auntjess said:

A plus size event in Times Square, underwear and bathing suits, but no Whit.
And none of these people are close to her size, except one guy.
This is from Facebook, and I don't know how to detach it, but I think you should be able to see it.
 

In New York, anything above a size 8 is considered "plus size".

Considering how cold it's been lately, those people are brave!

[Dot]

31 minutes ago, auntjess said:

 

Quote

A plus size event in Times Square, underwear and bathing suits, but no Whit.

 

That's really something; thanks for sharing, @AuntJess. It takes (exposed) guts to parade around in your underwear in NYC's Time Square in winter.

I appreciate the fact that the organizers see body positivity as important for all sizes. Twit never sees it except as something she demands for herself & a few others, such as Natalie. And as much as she loves to parade around in her underwear, she'd never do this event bc she would be only one among many & not the "star."

Edited December 11, 2018 by Dot

[auntjess]

The Catfish episode, Chelsea and Lennie, is on the schedule for 9PM ET tonight, 12/19, on MTV.
 

[Colleenna]

OK, I plead guilty to body shaming in reverse (but only in my head.) I was watching Jeopardy, and the champ is a woman who used to be the bass player for The Runaways. When I first saw her, I thought "holy fuck, that woman is too skinny!"  My husband, who has no filter, said "Anorexia much?" 

[Me from ME]

The Catfish episode must have been riveting. No comments on that thread so far. (Disclaimer: the bf DVRed it so I may be reporting back in a few days.)

[Colleenna]

Woohoo!! Just saw that the new season of Dr. Now premieres on January 2!!!! 

No, it's not Twitney. ;-) 

[Brooklynista]

1 hour ago, Colleenna said:

Woohoo!! Just saw that the new season of Dr. Now premieres on January 2!!!! 

No, it's not Twitney. ;-) 

Patience my dear friend. Her day will come.

[Me from ME]

Just watched the Catfish episode. The cohost was Tallulah Willis, daughter of Demi Moore and Bruce Willis who stated that she is someone who once had body dysmorphia disorder. Chelsea had been in an online relationship with one Lennie Alehat for about a year. She had recently lost 200 lb and was a viewer of MBFFL. She had been attracted by Lennie's beard and when he left the show she had reached out to him since they were both artists. They had spoken on the phone but never face timed or met in person. although he had broached the topic of marrying her and having children. They had also talked of having tattoos together.

The host of the show did some detective work and found that the phone number she had been using to call and text him belonged to a woman. The host tried calling and although it didn't go through his phone rang and it was Lennie.  He acted a little uninvolved and said something to the effect that he hadn't planned on her trying to meet him using the Catfish tv show but later agreed to go California to meet her.

One minor detail was that Chelsea already had a bf irl and felt that she might hurt his feelings if he found out that she had flown to LA to meet someone she had met online. She telephoned him and confessed before meeting Lennie. When questioned why he had never face timed her, or tried to meet her in person Lennie said he was working two jobs and the distance between his house in NC and Chelsea's in Utah was too far to make it work.

Lennie still has those intense eyes, flat affect, and evasiveness that we all saw on MBFFL. He was a little vague why the phone number was for a woman but said it was his sister's number and they had a "family calling plan". Interestingly, his sister's husband has the same first name as Lennie's actual first name although the last name doesn't form the same anagram.

Satisfied that she had really been communicating with a "reality tv star" Chelsea returned to Utah to focus on her relationship with her bf but not before accompanying Lennie to a tattoo artist for his first ink.

Three month update: Chelsea has gained some weight back, broke up with her boyfriend and has resumed her relationship with Lennie who is planning on moving to Utah.

[Sasha888]

Maybe I am just an old fart, but I don't get it when people say they are in an "online relationship". To me, that's an oxymoron. I don't consider myself to be in a relationship with someone I've never met in person.

I'm not saying it's cool to lead someone on, but if someone can't be bothered to meet you in person, to me that's not a relationship (especially if it's been a whole year). Or at the very least, it should be a sign to you that you're in a crappy relationship. I would be thinking a) this person is married or otherwise involved with someone b) this person is just stringing me along for their own entertainment or c) this person liked me at first, but is liking me less and less and because of that, is not making any kind of effort to meet up in person...basically, he's just not that into me and is just avoiding having to tell me that.

This might make me an old fart too, but what was she doing contacting him if she had a boyfriend? I have zero sympathy for anyone who feels they were wronged by their side piece. 

In other words, don't come crying to me when the person you were cheating on your significant other with hurts your feelings.

[ClareWalks]

Thanks @Me from ME for the recap! 

[Me from ME]

Sasha88,

After watching the dysfunction I felt like I needed a shower.  To clear up the record she met the real life bf after she hadn't gotten very far with Lennie. The bf in Utah seemed like a good guy who, although being blind sided, told her to go ahead and do what she needed to do but to try not to get murdered.

I think Lennie was weird to talk about marriage and children given how noncommittal he was about everything else. At one point they said they would each paint a portrait of the other. She did, he didn't. "It was in his other notebook". Eventually he did produce the portrait and it was a whole lot better than the one he did of Twit.

[Dot]

44 minutes ago, ClareWalks said:

Thanks @Me from ME for the recap! 

Me too, @Me from ME.

[Sasha888]

2 hours ago, Me from ME said:

After watching the dysfunction I felt like I needed a shower. 

HA! :-) Well thanks for watching it and reporting, so we didn't all feel like we needed a shower!

2 hours ago, Me from ME said:

I think Lennie was weird to talk about marriage and children given how noncommittal he was about everything else.

Extremely. Who talks about that kind of stuff when you haven't even met?

Actually I can answer that question...my ex-husband, that's who. He was talking to tons of women on the computer, and while he thought he was clever, he neglected to remember he was married to a woman with a computer science degree, who could find all sorts of things you THINK you deleted. Nope...at that time while I was still working in that field, I could do a lot more with computers than I can now (fast moving field....if you don't use it, you lose it, now I feel barely computer literate at times!)...anyway, I found pictures of engagement rings, the whole nine yards. Yet when I kicked his ass to the curb, he put all his energy into winning me back. He clearly had no intention of leaving me, and he was never unaccounted for at any time. He kept insisting "I never cheated on you"...well, technically yes, I know that, I know he never disappeared on a mysterious business trip where he could have been meeting these women in real life, but in my mind he was cheating his ASS off on me, so good riddance. 

I'm sure he was a doctor or a lawyer when he was talking to his victims too, and rich to boot. I never felt angry at any of them, I felt very sorry for them. He had no intention of ever even taking them out to dinner, let alone marrying them. If he sent them a picture of himself, it probably wasn't a picture of him, just some pic off the internet. 

But I digress...my point was, if you were really interested in getting married and having kids with someone, I think you'd be motivated enough to actually meet them in person. Not just talk for a year without ever even meeting.

I felt like Lennie or whoever the hell he really is was creepy on the show, and he's just upped his level of creepiness with this new information. 

[Dot]

Hey, @AuntJess.

What nights are Dr PP & M600#L on? I'm happy to look them up for you this week. Or if you want to check for yourself each week, you can go to

http://www.showbuzzdaily.com

[Dot]

In the Big Girls Don't Cry @ClareWalks mentioned again that she no longer watches MBFFL & it's the "best decision ever."

For the past 2 seasons I've felt the same way, but I enjoy the snarf here too much not to watch MBFFL in order to understand the comments in this forum better.

But I have a new reality show fascination -- Love after Lockup on WEtv Fri nights. There's a pTV forum for that show, too; but the level of commentary doesn't come anywhere near the level here.

[SevenCostanza]

9 hours ago, Dot said:

But I have a new reality show fascination -- Love after Lockup on WEtv Fri nights. There's a pTV forum for that show, too; but the level of commentary doesn't come anywhere near the level here.

One of my favorite shows!   Much more entertaining than Twit and company.  

[AZChristian]

Folks on PTV got me hooked on Love After Lockup after 90-Day Fiance ended for the season.  I'm embarrassed to admit how much we like it . . . although I'm not sure "like" is the right word.  Maybe "hate-watch"????

[Dot]

48 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

Folks on PTV got me hooked on Love After Lockup after 90-Day Fiance ended for the season.  I'm embarrassed to admit how much we like it . . . although I'm not sure "like" is the right word.  Maybe "hate-watch"????

I think "like" is a fair choice. How could you not like a show which features characters such as Lizzie, Michael, Clint & Matt? And you gotta like the decisions they make. (For example, Scott goes into further debt to buy a $21,000 car for Lizzie which she cannot use since her license was yanked for 8 DUIs. Straight out of O. Henry.)

[SevenCostanza]

25 minutes ago, Dot said:

I think "like" is a fair choice. How could you not like a show which features characters such as Lizzie, Michael, Clint & Matt? And you gotta like the decisions they make. (For example, Scott goes into further debt to buy a $21,000 car for Lizzie which she cannot use since her license was yanked for 8 DUIs. Straight out of O. Henry.)

I hate watch Twit, but  I really like Love After Lock up, it's the gift that keeps on giving.

Edited February 16, 2019 by SevenCostanza

[auntjess]

I'll have to check Love after Lockup.  
Other than Dr. Pimple Popper, I love the Drain (the Ocean, the Bermuda Triangle) shows, and To Catch a Smuggler:Colombia or Peru.
Cocaine is very versatile, and you can make it into a plastic-like material and use is to line your luggage or purse, it can also be a liquid or gel.
 

[MrsWitter]

Love after Lockup sounds really good. I admit, I bailed on Twit & Co. part of the way through last season, but I missed the snark so I got back into this season. My SO watched some of it with me last season because he was fascinated by the Avi storyline. Then, he became even more fascinated by how truly horrible a person Twit is. He always is saying (somewhat in shock): “it’s not about her being fat. She’s just a mean, horrible human being!” He watched one or two of the episodes this season, but decided he couldn’t continue and was surprised I was stilling watching it (“you hate that show!” he says). I told him I just have to get through the show each week so I can snark on her here! It’s honestly my sole purpose for watching now. 😆

I know there has to be a few of us, but I don’t know how many other Bravo devotees are watching MBFFL. I’m totally Bravo’s bitch though- they put it on and I watch it. The threads for Housewives, Vanderpump Rules, and Below Deck are usually pretty poppin’, if anyone is looking for additional snark material.

And @auntjess- I feel I’m already so much more informed on cocaine thanks to your post! Did anyone else ever watch Nip/Tuck? Crazy things were always happening on that show- like drug smugglers putting the drugs in breast implants and then women would have surgery once they crossed the border to remove the implants and drugs.

[Dot]

13 hours ago, auntjess said:

I'll have to check Love after Lockup.
 

It's on WEtv Fri night. Try to see the early episodes. Once in a while,WEtv runs a marathon  of them. (Just a couple of days ago, unfortunately. I wish I had known you were interested.)

[SevenCostanza]

9 hours ago, MrsWitter said:

Below Deck are usually pretty poppin’

This season of Below Deck was excellent! Love that show.  I used to love the Housewives too but I can't get into them like I used to.

If anyone is interested in episodes of Love After Lockup the WE TV site has all the episodes.   Season 1 was really good too.

http://www.wetv.com/shows/love-after-lockup/videos/season-01/episode-05-surprises-and-sentences/surprises-and-sentences-sneak-peek

[MrsWitter]

2 hours ago, SevenCostanza said:

This season of Below Deck was excellent! Love that show.  I used to love the Housewives too but I can't get into them like I used to.

If anyone is interested in episodes of Love After Lockup the WE TV site has all the episodes.   Season 1 was really good too.

http://www.wetv.com/shows/love-after-lockup/videos/season-01/episode-05-surprises-and-sentences/surprises-and-sentences-sneak-peek

It really was. I think it was the best season of BD yet. But the reunion was boring AF. I vary widely on the Housewives. I used to watch them all, religiously, but I’ve taken steps back at times from Atlanta and NJ because it all felt so toxic and mean (which is saying something for the Housewives). OC has gotten boring and needs a cast shakeup. But I really loved Dallas last season (it still feels all new and fresh) and NYC is always entertaining to me. Even when it’s boring, I still love BH, but this season does seem like it’s actually going to be dramatic and break the monotony.

Thanks for posting the link to Love After Lockup!

[auntjess]

14 hours ago, MrsWitter said:

And @auntjess- I feel I’m already so much more informed on cocaine thanks to your post! Did anyone else ever watch Nip/Tuck? Crazy things were always happening on that show- like drug smugglers putting the drugs in breast implants and then women would have surgery once they crossed the border to remove the implants and drugs.

They haven't shown that, but they've had shows where women who come for cosmetic surgery are recruited as smugglers.
A lot of people swallow condoms stuffed with cocaine, and so they'll do body x-ray scans to catch them.
 

[Dot]

@Mothra & @Monagatuna, I do have grab bars -- and thanks for the suggestion.

A few years ago, the Sr Ctr near me had a program to install grab bars in the bathrooms of elderly residents. I was skeptical about my need for them. but the installation was free, so I said, "Sure."

I got one in my shower & one near my toilet. And they have been godsends. Frankly, I don't know how I'd get along without them.

I also have a rubber mat with nubs that make the floor less slippery. (The undersides of the nubs act as suction cups to hold the mat in place.) So, I'm probably as safe in the shower as I can be.

[Mollysmom]

I thought I'd chime in about the shower/grab bar subject as well. I am physically disabled - I can't stand on my legs unless I have my leg braces and shoes on (I walk on crutches), so showering is a no go for me. I also can't step into a bathtub, so I have always either just transferred myself from the toilet to the edge of the tub with my arms, or like now, I have a big wooden bench beside the tub that I sit on to dress/undress, then I just swing my legs over the edge of the tub from there and use grab bars to pull myself into the tub. 

I have an older friend who had hip issues and couldn't step into the tub anymore, and I told her about sitting on the edge and just swinging the legs over and in the tub, then using grab bars to lower into the tub. She said worked like a charm and would never have thought to do it that way. 

[Dot]

This WaPo has nothing to do with Twit, but I found it to be such a refreshing piece of news that I thought y'all would. too.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2019/02/27/how-many-people-does-it-take-free-fat-rat-stuck-manhole-cover-this-town-found-out/

[Colleenna]

30 minutes ago, Dot said:

@Mothra & @Monagatuna, I do have grab bars -- and thanks for the suggestion.

A few years ago, the Sr Ctr near me had a program to install grab bars in the bathrooms of elderly residents. I was skeptical about my need for them. but the installation was free, so I said, "Sure."

I got one in my shower & one near my toilet. And they have been godsends. Frankly, I don't know how I'd get along without them.

I also have a rubber mat with nubs that make the floor less slippery. (The undersides of the nubs act as suction cups to hold the mat in place.) So, I'm probably as safe in the shower as I can be.

Was it you that mentioned the DIY suction cup grab bars? I have one. I don't actually grab onto it --- it's more of a "touchstone" for me --- but it seems quite sturdy. You do need to remove it (it's easy to remove and reinstall) whenever you clean your shower walls. Otherwise, about once every two months the suction cups give way and it falls into the shower/tub. Scared the bejabbers out of me the first time it happened. I thought someone was trying to break into the house. 

[Dot]

I think it was @Monagatuna with the suction cup grab bar. This discussion started in the S6-E8 thread; you could check there.

[auntjess]

23 hours ago, Mollysmom said:

I have a big wooden bench beside the tub that I sit on to dress/undress, then I just swing my legs over the edge of the tub from there and use grab bars to pull myself into the tub. 

An older friend, had a bench, I see on amazon they're called transfer benches, and they fit over the tub side, and you can slide over from outside tub, to inside.

https://www.amazon.com/Plastic-Transfer-Bench-Adjustable-Backrest/dp/B002VWK0T6/ref=pd_sbs_121_1/146-0328810-9646976?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=B002VWK0T6&pd_rd_r=81c32263-3bd6-11e9-9cbc-61e57e71bb01&pd_rd_w=EJTBl&pd_rd_wg=SF7Qz&pf_rd_p=588939de-d3f8-42f1-a3d8-

d556eae5797d&pf_rd_r=P37F807899V26XTBQ2RP&psc=1&refRID=P37F807899V26XTBQ2RP

[Mollysmom]

1 hour ago, auntjess said:

An older friend, had a bench, I see on amazon they're called transfer benches, and they fit over the tub side, and you can slide over from outside tub, to inside.

https://www.amazon.com/Plastic-Transfer-Bench-Adjustable-Backrest/dp/B002VWK0T6/ref=pd_sbs_121_1/146-0328810-9646976?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=B002VWK0T6&pd_rd_r=81c32263-3bd6-11e9-9cbc-61e57e71bb01&pd_rd_w=EJTBl&pd_rd_wg=SF7Qz&pf_rd_p=588939de-d3f8-42f1-a3d8-

d556eae5797d&pf_rd_r=P37F807899V26XTBQ2RP&psc=1&refRID=P37F807899V26XTBQ2RP

My mom has one of those  - she has had a few strokes and can't stand to shower. I would have a hard time getting on it - I've tried, because it doesn't extend far enough outside the tub for me to easily get on it and get undressed/dressed. My set up works perfectly for me since it was custom made. Plus, I've always taken baths, I can't stand showers. Don't like the feeling of water hitting  me. I've had to take showers in the hospital in some weird shower chair and I was either half dry or freezing cold once I was all wet. 

[cherenkov]

There's been some talk in other threads about women not wanting to go to the doctor because they don't want to get weighed, especially really fat women like Whitney, and how doctors need to stop having patients weighed at every visit to remove that fear or whatnot that keeps fat women out of the doctor's office.

I disagree vehemently with this. The scale is nothing but a statement of fact. Being told when you're fat to lose weight for your health is a statement of fact. An adult who is in denial of and angry at the facts needs to grow up and learn that the world does not exist to prop up the misguided feelings of someone who cannot handle reality.

I used to be fat. I used to try to pretend that it wasn't that bad, and that I wasn't really that fat because I wasn't the completely immobile, My 600-LB Life variety of fat. Every time I went to a doctor, or an urgent care, or anywhere for anything vaguely medical they weighed me and told me to lose weight. They told me the diseases I was setting myself up for, and I didn't want to hear it because they were breaking the spell of denial I had put myself under. They told me that the road I was on leads to one place and - though they phrased it more kindly than I will - that place is the cemetery.

Yeah, I was ashamed. Yeah I hated being told I was fat and called unattractive and gross by people. I was angry at doctors for telling me repeatedly that I needed to lose weight. One day I woke up and accepted that the only way to make it stop was to do what I should have done all along and focus on being a healthy person of a normal weight. That none of those things I was so angry about were the fault of anyone but me, and the responsibility to change fell on me, not them. I lost more weight than I currently weigh now through a complete lifestyle change that includes eating a calorie controlled diet that meets my nutritional needs and doesn't offer me a surplus of calories on which to get fat. Instead of dead, I'm now a multiple-sport endurance athlete.

Don't like it that you keep getting told to work on your weight at the doctor? The solution is literally in your control.