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Alyssa and John: Lunch with Lurch


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On a serious note, I hope Alyssa's okay. On a snarky note, I hope she and John take her health issues as a wake-up call to slow the baby train. Even if Alyssa's heart problem had nothing to do with pregnancy, added stress can't be good for her. I'm sure she'll be announcing #4 before the year's out, but a girl can dream...

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No heart surgery is fun. Ablation is one of the easiest though. There's no real recovery time from it or anything. Many people have it done while they are awake and have no aftereffects at all. I had it done while I was asleep, but I'm sort of a wuss that way. The worst part for me was the bandage on my thigh/groin from the guidewire. That was tender for a while. 

Essentially, they go in and create scar tissue where electrical signals are misfiring and giving you an extra heartbeat or palpitation. It takes a while because they have to find each place to create the scar tissue. 

When I had mine done, I was having dinner and headed home like an hour or 90 minutes later. 

It won't slow her down on the kid front at all. 

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19 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Per Alyssa's IG, John posted that Alyssa had ablation surgery earlier today. She's been suffering from arrhythmia for some months, apparently.

Whoa,  that's too bad.

I have atrial flutter which is like atrial fibrillation.  I feel a fluttering sensation rather than full on skipping beats. Hard to explain but it is an actual fluttering feeling like my heart is jumping around trying to get its beats in order aka 'sinus rhythm.'  Luckily mine is controlled with a common heart/blood pressure med & I have never had to have an ablation.  My medicine has to be taken on time & if I miss or am late with a dose, things go haywire. I haven't had an episode in over a year. I really feel for Eddie on RHOOC with his problems. 

I'm sure Alyssa has gone the med route because I would think that is the first line of treatment.  I was diagnosed a few years ago & feel I was on the younger end of the spectrum for heart problems but I realize all ages can suffer. Hopefully the doctors told her to lay off the pregnancies not just for her own health but for  the good of her younger family. They need a mother & wife. 

Edited by Barb23
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5 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Going by what John wrote about a 2 hour prep, it sounds like she had general. Would that indicate a more serious issue? 

No, some doctors put everyone under for it. Some don't. Mine didn't like to, but I insisted because I knew I couldn't lie there perfectly still for hours while they "rooted around" looking for problem areas. I think I read something about 6 hours for her so I assume she was knocked out too. 

My experience was: Essentially, they prep your thigh/groin area and then take you into this really cold room with the tiniest table/bed you have ever seen. It was like laying down on a balance beam. They put those sticky things everywhere on you, including your feet. You're hooked up to IVs and there are like 15 people standing there sticking circles and squares to you. Kind of like angioplasty or one of those, they send a camera and the instrument to create scar tissue up through your artery after you are asleep or at least sedated. They found my issue during a stress test so they had to try to recreate it by sending signals to my heart to try to get it to do the wrong thing.

I asked the doctor not to tell me any more, as I didn't want to think about it.   

My guess is that she will follow doctor's orders for a while until she feels comfortable. If she's like me, she's probably going to wonder constantly about it coming back. Every little hiccup or short breath will scare her a little. But as time goes on, she'll get back to her normal life. That's assuming they did get everything and that she doesn't have to go through more treatment or medication. 

Because they go in through an artery, she'll be on light duty for a few days so that she doesn't tear it and bleed out. They will probably recommend that she not get pregnant any time soon because there is a chance it didn't work and some medications would be bad to introduce while pregnant. If they get it under control though, there shouldn't be a problem. 

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7 minutes ago, sATL said:

Did Kelly and Gil come for the surgery? Or post-op care? They could have been a help in watching the girls..

OMG all I can imagine is them coming with a bunch of the younger kids and Alyssa telling the dr. she has to stay in the hospital longer!  My guess is that her inlaws were the help, but I guess we will find out.

6 minutes ago, lookeyloo said:

OMG all I can imagine is them coming with a bunch of the younger kids and Alyssa telling the dr. she has to stay in the hospital longer!  My guess is that her inlaws were the help, but I guess we will find out.

LOL ! I figured all of the travel scheming Kelli went though for the birth of baby #3 - she would be hoping a flight (w/o her own younger children) to be there for her child who is having heart surgery. 

Edited by sATL
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3 hours ago, 3 is enough said:

Alyssa said in an Instagram story yesterday that Katie was helping her with the girls.  I assume it is her sister Katie, unless John also has a sister named Katie?

Carlin had her wedding shower over the weekend. She commented to Katie on IG that she missed her. Katie posted a story showing Alyssa recovering. So I think Katie Bates must be there. 

Josie wasn't at the shower either. She and kelton were in Charleston. Josie said Carlin changed the shower dates and they already had plans. Interesting though since the show hyped up the close Josie Alyssa relationship. Maybe they were checking in by phone. 

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2 minutes ago, RebeccatheWriter said:

Carlin had her wedding shower over the weekend. She commented to Katie on IG that she missed her. Katie posted a story showing Alyssa recovering. So I think Katie Bates must be there. 

Josie wasn't at the shower either. She and kelton were in Charleston. Josie said Carlin changed the shower dates and they already had plans. Interesting though since the show hyped up the close Josie Alyssa relationship. Maybe they were checking in by phone. 

Hmmm, interesting. Just my observation, but it seems like when this crowd marries, it's all about them and the undesirable stuff is left to the single sisters. Boob/Michelle have always put their wants first, as do Kelly and Gil. Josie keeps her plans, Katie gets stuck with babysitting duty. It's the Fundie way.

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9 hours ago, BitterApple said:

Hmmm, interesting. Just my observation, but it seems like when this crowd marries, it's all about them and the undesirable stuff is left to the single sisters. Boob/Michelle have always put their wants first, as do Kelly and Gil. Josie keeps her plans, Katie gets stuck with babysitting duty. It's the Fundie way.

It could be that Alyssa didn't want her parents there to help.  I wouldn't want Kelli around to help me get over a procedure and help with my small children.  Better to have Katie who would be the biggest help to Alyssa than Kelli.

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12 hours ago, BitterApple said:

Hmmm, interesting. Just my observation, but it seems like when this crowd marries, it's all about them and the undesirable stuff is left to the single sisters. Boob/Michelle have always put their wants first, as do Kelly and Gil. Josie keeps her plans, Katie gets stuck with babysitting duty. It's the Fundie way.

I'm an only child so I didn't grow up with siblings. My parents are both from big families (8 kids and 14 kids). My mom's family is very much hands on. When my mother had surgery for lung cancer a few years ago, all of her siblings showed up at the hospital to wait for word together. My father's family is the opposite. They call around to each other, wring their hands, and then do nothing. 

Given that Katie's getting or about to get the brunt of the work at Casa Bates soon, Florida with only three kids who were probably on good behavior for her is a minor job. 

Alyssa probably didn't want everyone around given her temperament. I don't blame her at all.

The dynamic of all this struck me as strange with the emphasis they place on how close every sibling is with each other. Again, I'm an only so I can only comment on how it looks. Josie was absent from two kind of biggish events for two sisters she chose to be in her own wedding. Maybe she had conversations with them behind the scenes and they encouraged her to keep her plans.

Even from a show/storyline perspective, it would make sense for Josie and Kelton to volunteer to go to Florida on child watching duty for Josie's matron of honor/sister. Good practice for Josie, who sort of skipped out on some of the sister mom duty since there were always older sisters at home and she got married so young. 

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5 hours ago, iluvobx said:

It could be that Alyssa didn't want her parents there to help.  I wouldn't want Kelli around to help me get over a procedure and help with my sm weall children.  Better to have Katie who would be the biggest help to Alyssa than Kelli.

Gil and Kelly were both in FL. As I noted above, Kelly posted a picture of them at Alyssa's bedside.

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19 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Gil and Kelly were both in FL. As I noted above, Kelly posted a picture of them at Alyssa's bedside.

I know they were there for the procedure but I wouldn't want them to stay and help.  They probably went back to Tenn when they knew she was ok.   Also, don't see Kelli taking on 3 young children and helping her daughter.

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22 minutes ago, iluvobx said:

I know they were there for the procedure but I wouldn't want them to stay and help.  They probably went back to Tenn when they knew she was ok.   Also, don't see Kelli taking on 3 young children and helping her daughter.

No, Kelly Jo would not take on actual work. She was there and we'll probably see on a future episode that she sat in the waiting area worrying with one or two shots of her hugging a granddaughter or two. Then there will be a talking head of her and Gil feeling torn about wanting to be there and wanting to be with Carlin for the wedding shower. 

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On 4/17/2019 at 3:18 PM, Sew Sumi said:

Since the procedure was last Thursday and the shower Saturday, I suspect they were back in plenty of time to attend.

Logic doesn't apply to these people. I would bet money we'll get a talking head interview of them going worrying if they can fit it all into their schedules because they "want to be there for all their children."

Since the last two showers have had the bride or bride and groom being late (plus others), maybe this one can have Kelly Jo and Gil arriving at the last minute for the drama. Cue the worried looks of Erin and Whitney as they pour jarred salsa into plastic bowls. 

Edited by RebeccatheWriter
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Aside from Michael, all of the sisters were rail thin on their wedding days. Carlin is also tiny. As was Kelly in her wedding pictures. Kelly wasn't that bad until menopause hit. Erin has retained a few lbs. after having 3 kids in 3 years, but she isn't overweight or anything. Alyssa probably has the metabolism we all wish to have.

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On 4/19/2019 at 10:23 PM, Sew Sumi said:

Aside from Michael, all of the sisters were rail thin on their wedding days. Carlin is also tiny. As was Kelly in her wedding pictures. Kelly wasn't that bad until menopause hit. Erin has retained a few lbs. after having 3 kids in 3 years, but she isn't overweight or anything. Alyssa probably has the metabolism we all wish to have.

Michael, Tori, and Erin tend to carry weight around their middles as Kelly does. Alyssa, Carlin, and Josie both seem to have more slender builds and probably great metabolism. Katie is slim right now, but she tends to take after Erin who is still carrying a bit of extra baby weight still (understandable with three close in age). Addie and Ellie look a lot like Michael where Callie looks more like Josie and Alyssa in terms of build. 

Kelly and her daughters all could use some advice on dressing for their body types. Alyssa, Josie, and Carlin have the body types that can wear most anything. Kelly and the other girls would look better in some different styles and fewer layers. I get the modesty thing, but they tend to go boxy and not have natural flow and curves. It adds inches to the eye when they cut off a longer torso at the hips. Long dresses are comfy, but these girls aren't tall and it rounds them out even more. I say this as a big girl who prefers comfortable clothing.

The boys have their fashion issues too. Zach has battled his weight, but the tight shirts he seems to like (or Whitney likes for pictures) add the pounds back on him. Nathan is someone who should ditch the layers too. He has a naturally square head. If he grew out his hair a little to not emphasize the shape, he'd look thinner. He also has a short neck, which would look better without collared shirts all the time. Lawson should actually emphasize horizontally since he is vertically challenged. Otherwise, he looks short and skinny. 

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I watched the you tube video tour of Alyssa's house. It's a nice, small house. They don't have a table to eat their meals. Isn't meal time supposed to be a 'Godly thing" to do every evening? Where do 5 people sit to eat?

On another note, I couldn't believe that her children DO NOT GET BATHED every day. She bathes them 3 times a week. How awful. She doesn't live too far away from me and believe me, those kids get sweaty  here in Central Florida. I can't imagine putting my children to bed after playing, inside OR outside. You still sweat. I bathed my 2 boys EVERY EVENING no matter what before they went to sleep. Just part of being CLEAN. Not to mention the filthy carpet in her bedroom; couldn't believe she would have allowed it to be in a photo where she's trying to sell her style and lifestyle.  Don't get me wrong, I like Alyssa and I'm not trying to be mean here, but clean your carpets, girl and bathe your children EVERY EVENING.

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6 hours ago, BitterApple said:

I wonder if that's a leftover habit of growing up poor. Before the TLC makeover, the Bateses' home was a glorified shack. It wouldn't surprise me if the siblings only bathed a couple times per week. Alyssa may not see it as a huge deal because it's how she was raised. 

In addition to growing up poor, there were simply a lot of children/people. They used well/spring water so cost wasn't necessarily an issue, but the capacity of a hot water tank certainly was not going to allow for the bathing of more than a dozen children and mom and dad every single night. Even splitting them between morning and evening would not allow for everyone to have hot water after a point. 

We are spoiled into thinking we need daily showers and baths. Not all that long ago people only bathed once a week (before the sabbath). That seems gross now, but then it was pretty standard practice. There are downsides to bathing a child daily, including drying out their skin and washing away any natural immunity they develop. 

If Alyssa's children play indoors most of the time and are not doing things that get them that dirty (numerous diaper blow outs, sweating profusely, etc.), then a more lax schedule is just fine. She may find it easier on her if she rotates their schedule so that each one gets a bath on a different night rather than all at the same time. 

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@floridamom I’m so with you on the daily bath for kids. It’s necessary. Warm bath & clean pj’s before bedtime! I understand not fully bathing a newborn everyday but toddlers & young children need a good soak. Lol. I cringe thinking about them going to bed sweaty... 

I saw a table in their kitchen. It was a corner table with some booth like seating & a couple chairs. She didn’t have a separate dining room or anything though. 

I also definitely noticed the filthy carpet & all the clutter/shoes/crap in her bedroom. Ick. Alyssa for sure loves her clothes, shoes & makeup... (I do too! Can’t blame her.) It won’t be long before they out  grow that house.

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On 4/17/2019 at 11:01 AM, RebeccatheWriter said:

No, Kelly Jo would not take on actual work. She was there and we'll probably see on a future episode that she sat in the waiting area worrying with one or two shots of her hugging a granddaughter or two. Then there will be a talking head of her and Gil feeling torn about wanting to be there and wanting to be with Carlin for the wedding shower. 

Kelly would need to take another daughter with her just to take care of Kelly while Kelly was there to take care of Alyssa.  What if Kelly needs something to eat?  Who is Kelly going to tell to go get Alyssa a glass of water? Wait, you mean Kelly was supposed to go get it?

On 4/19/2019 at 9:23 PM, Sew Sumi said:

Aside from Michael, all of the sisters were rail thin on their wedding days. Carlin is also tiny. As was Kelly in her wedding pictures. Kelly wasn't that bad until menopause hit. Erin has retained a few lbs. after having 3 kids in 3 years, but she isn't overweight or anything. Alyssa probably has the metabolism we all wish to have.

Kelly also started putting on weight after the tv money started rolling in.  When they were on the Lawson grocery budget, her weight was a lot lower.  So I suspect that a lot of their weights were somewhat restricted due to their grocery budget.  

On 4/20/2019 at 4:44 PM, BrianJ1962 said:

Do any of the Bates women (adults and/or kids) make their own clothes?

Michael did back in the day.  It's really for the best that she isn't now.  Go look for the time they went to Silver Dollar City with the Duggars for evidence.

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