Meet the Parents: Gil and Kelly Jo Bates

[Meow Mix]

15 hours ago, BetyBee said:

TThey also talked about how adamant Gil is about not borrowing....except from Lawson, who used to pay for everything! In short, Gil is a lazy hypocrite!

I suspect Gil didn't consider that borrowing because I willing to bet he never paid a cent back to Lawson.  If I were a parent, I'd be eating dog food before expecting my kids to pay for my groceries.

I often wonder if the way these people remained supposedly debt free is that they just didn't bother paying back any debts they incurred.  I know Gil would always cry poor at the hospital to get stuff written off.  I must have missed the part where Jesus said thou shalt stiff others.

[AgathaC]

Borrowing means obligation. Saying “we don’t borrow” can sound good and noble in a way. But combined with some of their other beliefs, it reeks of laziness and entitlement.

Edited May 29, 2023 by AgathaC

[Notabug]

6 hours ago, Meow Mix said:

I suspect Gil didn't consider that borrowing because I willing to bet he never paid a cent back to Lawson.  If I were a parent, I'd be eating dog food before expecting my kids to pay for my groceries.

I often wonder if the way these people remained supposedly debt free is that they just didn't bother paying back any debts they incurred.  I know Gil would always cry poor at the hospital to get stuff written off.  I must have missed the part where Jesus said thou shalt stiff others.

Yes, crying poor but godly and asking for freebies is part of God providing for them.  That's what Gil did in the ER and probably anytime they needed medical care or any other big ticket item.

Back when I had my own medical practice, it happened from time to time.  Someone would come in for care, need a procedure or other more expensive service including hysterectomy or prenatal care and delivery.  Most had some sort of crappy insurance with a high deductible.  They would be notified in writing by my office what the insurance would pay and what their portion was.  No objections from patient or family.  Then, I'd perform the service and, as soon as the billing went out, I'd get a letter, telling me how they knew I loved the Lord and would not want their godly selves and their umpteen kids to suffer which would happen if they had to pay their share.  Often accompanied by a couple of pamphlets similar to what David Rodrigues prints.

Many of these people had come to me for several years and I would sometimes give a small discount, maybe 10-20% which was still a significant dent in my income.  I'd invariably receive a letter or phone call telling me that it wasn't enough, they really couldn't afford to pay ANY of it and wanted their whole balance written off especially if I got some sort of token from their insurance.  Many f these people had insurance plans with huge deductibles, like $5000, and they really expected me to write the whole thing off, usually thousands of dollars.   The hospital wouldn't give them a 100% discount, so they tried to use all of their deductible on me and the pediatricians and anesthesiologist, None of them ever shortened their hospital stay or did natural childbirth without an epidural, of course.  They happily accepted all services knowing full well they were going to try to wriggle out of paying for it.

I stopped taking these folks unless they paid half of what they'd owe up front before the delivery or surgery.  Even then, I got stiffed a lot.

Edited May 29, 2023 by Notabug

[Absolom]

It's no wonder so many OBs now require monthly payments so the deductibles and such are met by 7 or 8 months.  

[BitterApple]

7 hours ago, Meow Mix said:

I suspect Gil didn't consider that borrowing because I willing to bet he never paid a cent back to Lawson.  If I were a parent, I'd be eating dog food before expecting my kids to pay for my groceries.

It's even worse considering Gil and Kelly both have college degrees while Lawson was making do with a half-assed homeschool education. They could've worked and brought in decent salaries, they just chose not to. 

[Heathen]

It's easy to be "debt free" if you don't pay your medical bills and you rely on other people to feed and clothe your zillion kids. And you rely on a television program to build adequate housing for them. Gil and Kelly are garbage. 

[Salacious Kitty]

In his latest video, Trace has asked for prayers for Papa Bill. His health is declining. We'll have to keep an eye on Gil to see if he heads to SC. 

[BitterApple]

1 hour ago, Salacious Kitty said:

In his latest video, Trace has asked for prayers for Papa Bill. His health is declining. We'll have to keep an eye on Gil to see if he heads to SC. 

Oh no 😥. I had a feeling this was coming given how frail he looked in Erin's and Alyssa's vlogs, but I hope he hangs on awhile longer. I can't imagine what that will be like for Gil's sister, if she loses both her husband and her dad within a matter of months. 

[cereality]

That’s sad. Hope he’s ok. He hasn’t looked well in recent videos, and I feel like his declining health is the reason that Alyssa, Erin, Michael, and Zach have all been proactive about stopping by individually with their spouses or families for short trips in the last few months. I think those 4 - and to some extent Law and Nathan too - are genuinely close with their grandparents. I suspect the rest of the herd will arrive this weekend to party party - as isn’t Papa Bill’s bday July 4 and they always do a gathering on the farm? Though honestly if he isn’t well and Jane is worrying/about tending to him, hope they just cancel; if G&K want to show up to check on Bill sans kids and then get a cake that day, fine. But I doubt Jane needs the stress of Carlin standing on her dining table or having to feed feral Jeb/Jud/Layla 15 meals over 5 days bc my sense is when they all arrive at the farm, they’re all on vacay and Mama Jane slogs away; typically Alyssa and Michael care enough to help their grandmother but I assume they won’t be there, both having just done individual visits like a month ago.

[Salacious Kitty]

I read that in a fairly recent video, Trace and Gil visited the farm to help with actual farming. I wonder what they are planning to do with that operation? I guess Gil's brother could take over, but what if he has his own career? Gil sure ain't becoming a full time farmer. 

[GeeGolly]

That is sad. Mama Janie didn't look all that healthy in the last pic of saw of her either. I'm glad she has family near by.

[65mickey]

Mama Jane was on a walker and looked like she could hardly move in the video that Alyssa posted about a month ago. I imagine her daughter and son who live on the farm are having to look after both of them.  I have a feeling the word has been put out that they have their hands full and can't host an army of Bates. At least I hope so. 

[cereality]

Well guess the Bates horde didn't take the hint that Mama Jane/Papa Bill aren't well/aren't up to hosting the usual big weekend for July 4. Bc Josie posted an IG showing her family driving to the grandparents with Warden and Elllie in tow. IDK if others are going or not, but that's at least 6 houseguests right there . . . . Maybe some of the other marrieds are doing their own thing for July 4 but I imagine G&K are headed down there with the other 5 unmarrieds.

[farmgal4]

On 5/9/2023 at 12:18 PM, ginger90 said:

Looks like they didn’t think too much about the graduation:

Party Party! 🎉🎈

[cereality]

Wow - Josie just said EVERYONE is going besides her 3 oldest siblings - so who is that Zach, Michael, Erin? Interesting bc Zach, Michael, Erin have been visiting individually with their families for the past year or two and actually spending time with the grandparents - rather than just going with the herd to party party.

Party on y'all. Hope Mama Jane is ready to go because here they all come and you best believe they are all on vacay once they arrive. They'll be chowing down, expecting home cooked meals for their kids even though they don't provide them at home, and some of them will be standing on Mama Jane's dining room table . . . .

[GeeGolly]

Thank goodness Z, M and E aren't going - that's 15 less people.

If Carlin and Evan would stay home too that would feel like 15 more less people.

Did Josie ride up in their RV?

[3 is enough]

If Gil’s dad is not doing very well then it’s possible a lot of them are going because it may be the last time they have this get together. On the one hand there are probably concerns about it being too much for Bill and Jane, but on the other hand he may not be around this time next year and I imagine the grandkids would regret not going. 
I am surprised Alyssa is making the trip again, since she was there not too long ago.

ETA: My guess is the ones who are concerned about it being too much are the ones who are not going.

I really hope that those who are going actually pitch in and help. Maybe when they see their grandparents in person they will realize they aren’t up to doing the things they were able to do in the past. 

 

Edited July 1, 2023 by 3 is enough

[cereality]

I get that the grandkids probably want to see him, but I'm unclear on why they need to all see him TOGETHER. Unless it's Bill's wish that they do July 4 just the way it's always been, it would've made more sense for individual families to visit - as Z, Michael, Alyssa, and Erin have been doing; in fact I think all of them have visited a few times each in the past yr. Law and Nathan have visited with their wives too though I think less often than the oldest siblings. My sense is Bill has been declining for a while, and Jane seems very aged too - I don't think it happened overnight; all of these grandkids could have been visiting all along.

I mean K&T and C&E don't work - in the past 12 months they couldn't find 3 days to go just with their family of 3 or 4? Josie works but not consistently and she finds time to traipse off to Connecticut w the 2 girls to visit their rich friends; Kelton doesn't give a shit about her family so I'm sure he wouldn't care if she took the girls without him. Same with Trace, Warden, Isiah - none of them have jobs lined up daily, they could all have gone whenever. To me this seems more like yeah Grandpa Bill is declining, need to go see him, why not go when we can party party too.

Even if Bill has for July 4 to be done, a few more of these marrieds could have tactfully declined, just to lessen the burden of Jane - and visited a month earlier. I mean if just G&K and the unmarried kids go, that's 9 houseguests right there - enough that it'll feel like a party for Bill and not like he's spending July 4/his bday with no family visiting.

[BitterApple]

I can understand wanting to do a last hurrah, so to speak, but I really hope Gil and Kelly have enough sense to get a hotel. Even when Jane was younger and healthier, she was overwhelmed with the chaos. I can't imagine how much stress it would cause her now. 

[Salacious Kitty]

2 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

I can understand wanting to do a last hurrah, so to speak, but I really hope Gil and Kelly have enough sense to get a hotel. Even when Jane was younger and healthier, she was overwhelmed with the chaos. I can't imagine how much stress it would cause her now. 

At least Josie and Kelton brought their camper. 

[lookeyloo]

The thing is - we don't know any of the conversations that any of them had between each other or with bill and Jane.   So either it is a great idea or a terrible idea or something in between.    Maybe they are all being selfish (not hard to believe) or it is something that they discussed and bill and Jane will appreciate (hard to believe). 

[3 is enough]

Josie’s stories showed Kelton making dinner (spaghetti) for everyone.  Looks like Jane did not have to cook tonight. That’s a positive. 

[BitterApple]

Lulz! Don't get me wrong, it was super nice of Kelton to cook, but does anyone else find it hilarious he went for the cheapest dinner possible? I don't expect him to grill New York strip for twenty people but spaghetti is the most basic, low effort meal you can make. It's just so on brand for his disdain of the family. 😅😅😅

Edited July 2, 2023 by BitterApple

[andromeda331]

I just hope Kelton and others are going to do all the cooking and stuff so Jane doesn't have to at all during this visit.

[65mickey]

5 hours ago, BitterApple said:

Lulz! Don't get me wrong, it was super nice of Kelton to cook, but does anyone else find it hilarious he went for the cheapest dinner possible? I don't expect him to grill New York strip for twenty people but spaghetti is the most basic, low effort meal you can make. It's just so on brand for his disdain of the family. 😅😅😅

Spaghetti is easy to put together and most people like it and it's a fairly easy cleanup. Also when Kelton cooks he uses different marinades and spices and he most likely doesn't have his fancy grill.  It looked like a pretty harrowing drive to the farm so cooking a big fancy meal might have been a bit much. 

Mama Jane is. rocking some short shorts in that picture of the girls and her. She looks good. 

[cereality]

11 hours ago, BitterApple said:

Lulz! Don't get me wrong, it was super nice of Kelton to cook, but does anyone else find it hilarious he went for the cheapest dinner possible? I don't expect him to grill New York strip for twenty people but spaghetti is the most basic, low effort meal you can make. It's just so on brand for his disdain of the family. 😅😅😅

Lol. I say this every time. I gave him the benefit of the doubt yesterday bc they had just driven that day and I assumed he hadn’t shopped or brought groceries and was working with what Bill/Jane had.

But yeah he does it every time. People are sooo in love with him and his business that they defend him but EVERY time he has the Bates over - which is really just for the girls’ bdays - they get roasted chicken + potatoes with salt. EVERY single time. Meanwhile the next night he’ll have his fam over and it’s always roasts or prime rib, lots of sides. And it’s not about feeding 100 Bates - the number that now come over for the girls’ parties is prob about 15 ppl now, which is about equal to his siblings, spouses, kids, grandparents who come from his side. I guess he’s the headship and he’s cooking but can’t Josie be like - uh make something besides chicken and salt potatoes. Though he is a dick - I’m sure he’d storm off and tell her to cook for her own family.

[ozziemom]

Yeah, Kelton does act like a dick but I don’t see John Webster ever cooking for anyone. Or any of the other SIL’s, except for maybe grilling. Low bar, I know.

[Absolom]

I know if I were cooking for that crowd they'd be getting spaghetti, make your own sandwiches, a taco bar, or a baked potato bar.  Of course, if Kelton consistently does major cooking for his family and short cuts the Bateses, then that's an issue.  Could it be a matter of taste and the Bates family prefers more bland food or they have little taste and it doesn't matter? 

Edited July 2, 2023 by Absolom

[65mickey]

I don't get the impression that the Bates's have refined tastes when it comes to food with the exception of maybe Zach who has taken an interest in cooking. 

Maybe the Balka family chips in on the food when Kelton is cooking steaks, ribs or fish. The Bates robably come in looking to be fed and leave without offering to help with the cleanup. I was taught  that when you were invited to dinner you ate what was served and thanked the hosts. No complaining about what you were served.  Smoked chicken, roasted potatoes and salad would be fine with me. 

[cereality]

Not saying the Bates should complain or do complain about chicken and potatoes for the 800th time. Just saying that if I'm Josie I'd be noticing that with his side it's ALWAYS nice cuts of meat with fancy sides, and for my family - eh whatever chicken is on sale and potatoes are fine. Though I'm pretty sure she never liked her family all that much to begin with and Kelton has convinced her even more that his side is sooooo much better, so she's probably not willing to pick a fight with Lord Kelton over her family.

I highly doubt that Kelton's dad/brothers are cutting him a check when they go to his house and eat steaks. I mean maybe for their camping trips where they all travel and eat together for a weekend, but for all the random dinner - I doubt it. Kelton shows himself shopping the day before his family parties - showing off whatever the best cuts of meat he's picking up. But whatever - she married an asshole, now she gets to do life with an asshole.

[65mickey]

But we really don't know how often Kelton cooks for his family vs. how often he cooks for the Bates.  All we see is snippets of what they post. Unless someone has personal knowedge of the the meals cooked for the Balkas as opposed to meals cooked for the Bates I don't think it is fair to assume that he only cooks cheap meals for Josie's family. Heck he may the only in-law who cooks for the Bates. I don't remember any of the other adult children and their spouses posting about cooking dinner for the family with the exception of a few chicken dinners.  And if Josie is concerned about the difference in price and quality of food provided to her family she is capable of buying the groceries and letting Kelton know that she wants a steak dinner for the Bates.  At least her "asshole" makes an effor to cook meals for various family members.  

[Absolom]

The Balkas may very well be passing some money Kelton's way when they are over for dinner.  I'm very aware when my one child has the whole family over and hand her a couple of hundred dollars to help defray the cost.  When I found out NO ONE had paid her for the dance tickets she purchased for the spring performance (she has to be the single point for the family purchases - studio rules), I paid her back for all the tickets.  We don't know that the Balkas don't follow a similar way of doing things.  Like I expect Gil is, my daughter's MIL has never offered to pay for anything.  Admittedly she has hosted a couple of birthday parties at her house, but if it isn't at her house, she is not paying.

Kelton may well favor his family.  We all know Gil is a cheapskate and Kelton may have good reason for what he does.  Or he could be a horse's rearend just like his FIL.  

Edited July 2, 2023 by Absolom

[BitterApple]

57 minutes ago, Absolom said:

Like I expect Gil is, my daughter's MIL has never offered to pay for anything.  Admittedly she has hosted a couple of birthday parties at her house, but if it isn't at her house, she is not paying.

She must be a distant cousin of my SIL. I've been with my husband nearly 20 years and in all that time she's never hosted a holiday, never contributes money towards the food and never brings anything, not even easy stuff like drinks and ice. It's always me or my MIL cooking the big dinners. 🙄

The discussion about Kelton makes me wonder how the Bates operate. I know Erin mentioned everyone contributing a dish for I Love You Day, but I wonder what they do for their ski trip and trips to the farm. Do Gil and Kelly ask the marrieds for x-amount and grocery shop for the whole group or is everyone on their own, minus the kids still living at home? Like we've just mentioned with our own families, levels of generosity (or lack thereof) can vary. You have family members that'll drop hundreds to feed everyone and others who just take, take, take. 

[lookeyloo]

Agree. They are fun to snark on for so many reasons but we don't know who said what to whom, how the food decisions are made, who is or is not upset at spaghetti or chicken etc.  Unless- we have an insider in our midst??

[GeeGolly]

I'm going to guess one of the reasons Kelton leans towards chicken for Bates gatherings is because they likely have no idea how many will actually show up. And if the Paines, the ZBates or the Smiths end up being no-shows or last minute add-ons, that ends up changing the count by a lot.

Asshole or not, I wouldn't mind Kelton rolling by with his million dollar grill and feeding my family for a day or two.

[So unbelievable]

Not a fan of Kelton at all, but I can't blame him for half assing it when they feed the Bates family.  How often do we see their family invited to others for dinner?  Maybe Josie doesn't care that her family is "wined and dined" as much as his family is.  I don't think the Bates family would appreciate good food.  

[ginger90]

[Salacious Kitty]

Papa Bill looks better than he did the last time someone (Alyssa?) was there and took pictures.

[floridamom]

Kelly must have been sweating bullets in that outfit.

[BitterApple]

Jane is in her 80s and looks more stylish and modern than Kelly. You'd think with all the modeling Kelly does for BSB, she'd have a few of those dresses on hand. Sure, they're cheap as hell but they're lightweight and probably cooler than that heavy denim. 

[lookeyloo]

Agree. I am wearing summer dress today and find a simple dress is much cooler than even shorts. And Kelly is hanging onto Gil like he is about to escape 

[Salacious Kitty]

8 minutes ago, lookeyloo said:

Agree. I am wearing summer dress today and find a simple dress is much cooler than even shorts. And Kelly is hanging onto Gil like he is about to escape 

Haha, no worries Kelly. No one wants him. 🤮

[AstridM]

2 minutes ago, Salacious Kitty said:

Haha, no worries Kelly. No one wants him. 🤮

He is so gross.

[ozziemom]

2 hours ago, BitterApple said:

Jane is in her 80s and looks more stylish and modern than Kelly. You'd think with all the modeling Kelly does for BSB, she'd have a few of those dresses on hand. Sure, they're cheap as hell but they're lightweight and probably cooler than that heavy denim. 

Outside of her modeling I have not seen KJ in any BSB clothes. Maybe Gil doesn’t think they are modest enough for her? She looks 100% better in a dress than in that hideous denim skirt. Makes no sense but perhaps she feels more comfortable in her old standby denim.

[Heathen]

12 hours ago, floridamom said:

Kelly must have been sweating bullets in that outfit.

Everyone else is wearing summer materials, Gil is wearing black pants and a sports polo that is probably sweaty and smelly, and Kelly is wearing a heavy denim skirt, a T-shirt, and a heavy denim shirt on top of it. I feel stuffy just looking at it. 

Kelly and her shit-eating grin. 😁

[AstridM]

7 hours ago, ozziemom said:

Maybe Gil doesn’t think they are modest enough for her?

If that was the case, why would he have allowed her to “model” so many of the clothes and be featured on their web site for thousands of strangers to see?

[Heathen]

4 minutes ago, AstridM said:

If that was the case, why would he have allowed her to “model” so many of the clothes and be featured on their web site for thousands of strangers to see?

Because cash comes before Christ? 

[Salacious Kitty]

11 minutes ago, AstridM said:

If that was the case, why would he have allowed her to “model” so many of the clothes and be featured on their web site for thousands of strangers to see?

I've noticed that they've found some younger plus sized models of late. Kelly hasn't modeled in maybe a couple of months. 

Edited July 6, 2023 by Salacious Kitty

[SMama]

I saw Jackson as well as Tori and family in a Bates farm video. It was a full house with only the  Paines missing. I also saw Khloe, Jadon, Bradley, and Whitney. I’m nosy and very curious about where that many people sleep. 

[Salacious Kitty]

I saw Jackson and Emerson in a SM post. No Tori. 

Did she look pregnant? She is due for an announcement.