S05.E01: TBD

[CSunshine76]

Has Nick’s Danielle been kidnapped? Is she trying to send a message when she looks uncomfortably at the camera and doesn’t speak? Wow.

[Auntie Anxiety]

Nick mansplains the solar system. 

[JayDub1987]

8 minutes ago, tvrox said:

Where does one buy a big bed like this? 

I’m assuming the husband had it custom built. Easy to do when you send all the braindead dip shits in your orgy family to go out and work to keep your lazy ass up. 

Edited March 5 by JayDub1987

[sainte-chapelle]

Well…the baby is cute

[Pepper Mostly]

Just now, tvrox said:

So do the other two just say in bed and watch while sexy time? 

I remember last season, Nick was coming back from the bathroom after sexytime with one wife, and had a knee trembler in the hallway with another. I think I blacked out for a minute or two after this revelation. 

[tvrox]

So this guy doesn't have to work, he doesn't have to get married, and he gets to sleep with 3 girls? Without any of the responsibility? WTF. I hope these wives smarten up and leave his ass and run off together. 

[Pepper Mostly]

Garrick is the living embodiment of the word "derp". 

[Auntie Anxiety]

That look of disbelief on the in-laws’ faces. Priceless.

Garrick’s company logo is in desperate need of a makeover.

[sainte-chapelle]

There are plenty of women in the US but Garrick wants a hot young Latina….he is a creep

[Pepper Mostly]

They keep saying they live a polygamist lifestyle, but they haven't managed it yet. All they do is talk about it. 

 

[Auntie Anxiety]

2 minutes ago, tvrox said:

So this guy doesn't have to work, he doesn't have to get married, and he gets to sleep with 3 girls? Without any of the responsibility? WTF. I hope these wives smarten up and leave his ass and run off together. 

Excellent synopsis. A+

The Arm & Hammer cat litter fluffies really skeeve me out.

[Pepper Mostly]

Hot damn, mother in law is FIT

[Auntie Anxiety]

Naeem’s mother needs to hear about how vagina steaming kills the germs.

[tvrox]

Mother in law has a point. 

[Pepper Mostly]

Oooh, Naeem is on the defensive already. 

Oh, she's talking about the pH balance! I bet there's some vagina steaming in the future!

[Auntie Anxiety]

Nailah is tired of the constant “stroking” that Naeem and his ego need, so she’s looking to outsource it.

[tvrox]

Ha, ha put up some wall art (LOVE, FAMILY, ETC) if he needs support. Or therapy! That's a great idea. 

[sainte-chapelle]

5 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Excellent synopsis. A+

The Arm & Hammer cat litter fluffies really skeeve me out.

Any excuse to show off my cat

[Pepper Mostly]

So, is Naeem prepared to fully support more than one wife? Muslims can have up to four wives, but they have to treat them all the same. Wife one gets a diamond necklace, ALL the wives get diamond necklaces. What does he do for work? 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Hahaha, Daniele. Get involved with this group of weirdos in haste, regret at leisure.

[judylo]

Tragedy ahead!

[tvrox]

Call me a prude but I don't think you should be kissing someone like that if you're pregnant with someone else's child. 

[Pepper Mostly]

Is Danielle finally waking up? Hahahaha, I kill me. 

[PupCal]

Oh no! If one wife leaves, Nick might have to stop having Deep Thoughts and work.

[tvrox]

2 minutes ago, sainte-chapelle said:

Any excuse to show off my cat

AW cutie. 

[Pepper Mostly]

OK, peeps, that was fun. See some of you on Wednesday for the Pounders! Can't wait! Love you all! 

[Auntie Anxiety]

That was more fun than a barrel of monkeys! Seeking Sister Wife snark rules. Well worth the wait. Hope to be back for 600lb. Life on Wednesday. So much snark, so little time. Ciao for now.

[tvrox]

This was fun! Maybe I've found a new show :). 

[sainte-chapelle]

Hope,to,see,you all on Wed!

[Pepper Mostly]

1 minute ago, tvrox said:

This was fun! Maybe I've found a new show :). 

Join us. Join us. Join us. 

[Chalby]

1 hour ago, sainte-chapelle said:

Are Garrick and his wife the only returning couple?

It appears Nick is back as well.

55 minutes ago, sainte-chapelle said:

Hope,to,see,you all on Wed!

Heck yes

Edited March 5 by Chalby

[Chalby]

55 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Join us. Join us. Join us. 

Definitely ! I have so many questions, observations, and red flags to discuss; I NEED the feedback this forum provides because everyone makes sense.

[Chalby]

1 hour ago, sainte-chapelle said:

There are plenty of women in the US but Garrick wants a hot young Latina….he is a creep

I am shocked Garrick is back. Last time, viewers could see his  lying and subtle bullying of his wife while chasing Roberta.

1 hour ago, tvrox said:

So this guy doesn't have to work, he doesn't have to get married, and he gets to sleep with 3 girls? Without any of the responsibility? WTF. I hope these wives smarten up and leave his ass and run off together. 

I doubt he refuses to marry as he wants them to commit to each other. I believe this legal distance allows the women to collect support if needed without asking him for financial contributions. Hopefully his name will be on any future children's birth certificates (for child support.).

[Chalby]

1 hour ago, sainte-chapelle said:

I am Catholic but never learned about the sperm to the brain part

That's because Garrick just spews out random facts about religion and relationships that aren't true, but his wife won't confront/ question him. Afterall, polygamy was a calling for him... Who is she to deny God's instructions?

[Chalby]

2 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Oh, I don't think @CSunshine76 means Garrick's Danielle. I think she means the Third Wife of Nick. She looks....uncomfortable. 

I almost feel like someone should slip her a note saying "blink twice if you need rescuing"

[PrincessPurrsALot]

I feel the need to share this important wisdom we received from Garrick in this episode:

Quote

Because a lot of the scriptures the terms where it says He fills you with the Holy Ghost, it's actually a sexual term. It actually means like sperm going into like intimacy that way. And even, scientifically, we've found that, you know, when a man and a woman become one, his sperm goes into a woman and that his DNA becomes part of her. It actually goes into her brain and she becomes one with him. But yet the woman can't transfer back her DNA back to the man. So it like showed the proof of how Christ was with his church. Like he transfers to us. We don't transfer to him."

Dannielle's face was priceless during his explanation.  Did anyone have the Holy Ghost is sperm on their bingo card for this season? Does Roberta have Garrick's DNA in her brain?  I always thought when the church spoke about Christ's love, it was non-sexual. So glad Garrick explained this to us.  He really outdid himself with this. 

[the-grey-lady]

4 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Hahaha, Nick, I’ve missed you.

Are you sure about that? You don't want to rethink that? 😉

4 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Nick and his harem are also repeaters. Nick is a real prize. He doesn't work. He just sits around and THINKS. Wait till you hear his deep thoughts. 

Remember how his wives bow down to him? He's running quite the rackett.

[the-grey-lady]

Weird Primetimer thing, sorry.

Edited March 5 by the-grey-lady

[suzeecat]

11 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Nick looks like the cat who ate the canary. He sits around all day doing nothing and the harem takes care of his every need.

Gotta love that they're reproducing now so he at least has to change diapers!  The "new girl" (I'm terrible with names) has her role, she will be the one who is uncomfortable bringing in new  wives.

[Pepper Mostly]

9 hours ago, Chalby said:

I am shocked Garrick is back. Last time, viewers could see his  lying and subtle bullying of his wife while chasing Roberta.

Not so subtle, either! He was practically elbowing Danielle out of the way so he could slaver all over Roberta. And gleefully reminding her that she'd need her headphones so that she wouldn't be disturbed by the noise coming from his and Bert's love shack. 

And they brought their KIDS along to Mexico for this tawdry meetup. That man is a sicko.

[suzeecat]

11 hours ago, tvrox said:

Where does one buy a big bed like this? 

That bed looked very janky and lumpy, like maybe two king beds pushed together.  Now, the sheets would be $$$, unless they made their own. 

[xwordfanatik]

I wasn't here for the Live Chat, but I watched, and I have a comment or two.

I can't wait for the new Roberta to tell Ick, "you is my king!"  😝

Ick is so damned repulsive.  That Holy Ghost shit is a new one on me.  HOW does Dannnnnielle put up with that 💩?  

Nick has it made in the shade.  He's got his own cult to worship his every utterance.  His dick must be made of gold!

 

[nosedive]

I ask this in all seriousness: does anyone think that Gar-yuck and Danielle are putting us on?  Maybe playing along with the polygamist ruse just to get on a TV show?  I hope so, for Danielle's sake.  If not, could her self esteem really be that low?  Could she really be that stupid?  When Gar-yuck was spewing that self-serving nonsense about the true nature of the Holy Spirit, her facial expressions ran the gamut, none of them indicating affirmation of anything he blathered.

I couldn't help but notice that Gar-yuck is working on a spare tire around his waistline.  Maybe all that pent-up Holy Spirit is giving him bloat.  

[princelina]

18 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Nick and his harem are also repeaters. Nick is a real prize. He doesn't work. He just sits around and THINKS. Wait till you hear his deep thoughts. 

This year he says he thinks and feels!  Plus he's got to care for the baby, so he's finally earning his keep 😄. That giant bed with those giant sheets - and they said there's room for one more in that bed!  How do you get a space on the end?  Meanwhile the boom boom room has a tidy little double bed.  These guys are so weird but the original three seem very happy and pleased with themselves 😄

18 hours ago, tvrox said:

These people think polygamy ok in the bible? Granted it's been a while since I've been in church, but I must have missed that part. 

Yes, Dannielle's face during this diatribe was hilarious.  And polygamy is not ok in the bible.  People do all sorts of things in the bible that are not okay.  Garrick's "pastor" has a lot to answer for.

18 hours ago, tvrox said:

I know where East Strousberg is! It's not far from Intercourse (seriously, LOL). 

Right in the heart of Amish country, so I was interested that that was where the black Muslims live.  They also said they've been practicing polygamy for a couple years, but gave no evidence for such a thing.  G&D have at least wasted a fortune on Bert!  They've been married 15 years, have no kids, and apparently eat a ton of produce.  I think this will be the couple I later accuse of "faking it" to be on tv and get some extra cash.  I wonder if they knew about the ph balancing and vagina steaming was from watching this show? 😄

52 minutes ago, nosedive said:

I ask this in all seriousness: does anyone think that Gar-yuck and Danielle are putting us on?  Maybe playing along with the polygamist ruse just to get on a TV show?  I hope so, for Danielle's sake.  If not, could her self esteem really be that low?  Could she really be that stupid?  When Gar-yuck was spewing that self-serving nonsense about the true nature of the Holy Spirit, her facial expressions ran the gamut, none of them indicating affirmation of anything he blathered.

The only thing is - Brazil is really, really far!  If they were just scamming they could get someone from another state and save a lot of time and money.  I couldn't believe they're going back to Brazil for the new girl!  Garrick must have some Brazilian ideal or fetish.

As for the last couple:  my first thought was: It seems like the wife is the pervert in this family! 😄. She said she met the girlfriend on a dating app - can you imagine going on a dating app to meet someone, and then the person wants you to join their marriage? 

I was surprised and delighted to find this on last night!  And I must say that unlike last year, I am interested in the new couples (thus far) 😃

[Maybeitsme]

21 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Oh, so hubby is a big old horndog who won't leave her alone. She's ready to spread the wealth a little. 

As with nasty Nick's first wife,  I feel. Now the second wife is just a freaky freak and Danielle the newest wife doesn't have a clue what she has gotten into 

[BAForever]

23 hours ago, nosedive said:

I ask this in all seriousness: does anyone think that Gar-yuck and Danielle are putting us on?  Maybe playing along with the polygamist ruse just to get on a TV show?  I hope so, for Danielle's sake.  If not, could her self esteem really be that low?

Have watched this shitshow from Day 1. If Dannnnielle is acting, she's darn good. Love watching her during the TH's. Ick is an asshole, but has some strange hold over Dannnnnielle. 

I say it's all real, but I'm wrong a lot. 

[b2H]

On 3/4/2024 at 11:25 PM, Chalby said:

That's because Garrick just spews out random facts about religion and relationships that aren't true, but his wife won't confront/ question him. Afterall, polygamy was a calling for him... Who is she to deny God's instructions?

When I listened to Garrick's drivel about polygamy and the Bible, I was literally shouting at my TV that none of that is in the Bible.  As with most religiosity, his interpretation is made-up to suit his whims.  Hell, even Dannielle was smirking a bit about it.  She's no fool (or is she?).

[Madding crowd]

Garrick reminds me of Joel Osteen and gives me the creeps just as much. Dannielle is either not too bright or has such low self esteem she is willing to suffer through another Brazilian bombshell!

When Nick and his harem were buying the baby a birthday gift they picked the cheapest doll that looked like it came from a dollar store. I think it would be confusing for the little girl to call all three moms the same name and not know which one is her real mom. And no way would I be able share a bed with three or more people; I move around too much and couldn’t stand not being able to turn. 

 

[Texasmom1970]

Okay Garrick trying to explain the sperm shit was gross, please don't ever do that again.

He and Kody should get together and talk nonsense!

[lamujerdecente]

On 3/5/2024 at 8:41 AM, Pepper Mostly said:

Not so subtle, either! He was practically elbowing Danielle out of the way so he could slaver all over Roberta. And gleefully reminding her that she'd need her headphones so that she wouldn't be disturbed by the noise coming from his and Bert's love shack. 

And they brought their KIDS along to Mexico for this tawdry meetup. That man is a sicko.

If Dani was my disrespectful tush, she would have told him no headphones needed because there will be no noise but 42.3 seconds of Ick's heaving.