S04.E02: Little Do They Know

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Quote

The Merrifields court Lea despite Roberta's disapproval. The Epps eye a longtime friend as a possible wife. The Foleys hope to bring potential wife April into their family. Nick Davis takes Danielle on a solo date to see where she stands with polygamy.

Original air date 2022.06.13

[Auntie Anxiety]

Do we live chat this shit show or cringe-watch while bemoaning the fact that we are wasting our lives individually instead of en masse?

[Maybeitsme]

12 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Do we live chat this shit show or cringe-watch while bemoaning the fact that we are wasting our lives individually instead of en masse?

Live is what I live for

[For Cereals]

Can we do it here?

[Auntie Anxiety]

This show is right up there in the pantheon of snarkworthy shows, along with My 600lb. Life and Love After Lockup.

2 minutes ago, For Cereals said:

Can we do it here?

I don’t know. I think we did last season.

[Maybeitsme]

Agreed  👍 

[For Cereals]

So Marcus is just a serial cheater and his wife just acquiesced…

[Auntie Anxiety]

April is Janice Soprano’s doppelgänger.

[For Cereals]

Which April?  Younger version of current wife or Shein club wear April?

[Auntie Anxiety]

It’s hard enough learning their names and then the added problem of having duplicate names? I’m going to need a scorecard.

Just now, For Cereals said:

Which April?  Younger version of current wife or Shein club wear April?

The April who is involved with the Tim Tebow lookalike and his wife(?) who has a nose that plastic surgery was invented for.

[For Cereals]

They look like sisters.  That was not a happy look on Brenda’s face…

[Auntie Anxiety]

Danielle’s red dress needs to be burned.

[Maybeitsme]

April April April... get a clue 

You are the new,  but look at the last one sniffing wine glasses and see yourself in a couple of years

[Maybeitsme]

Nick Nick Nick HA!

I can't imagine 

[For Cereals]

These two boohooing…give me a break.  This is going to be a Cody/Robyn situation.  He is IN LOVE with Bert. 

[Maybeitsme]

Just now, Maybeitsme said:

Nick Nick Nick HA!

I can't imagine 

Isn't this the family in the super small house,  with the small bed where they all sleep together 😴 🙄 

[For Cereals]

4 minutes ago, Maybeitsme said:

Isn't this the family in the super small house,  with the small bed where they all sleep together 😴 🙄 

I guess Nick’s research doesn’t involve more square footage.

[princelina]

31 minutes ago, For Cereals said:

These two boohooing…give me a break.  This is going to be a Cody/Robyn situation.  He is IN LOVE with Bert. 

Or thinks he is - their conversations don't go beyond, "Miss, you, love you, you're special, my king". They don't even know each other.

31 minutes ago, Maybeitsme said:

Isn't this the family in the super small house,  with the small bed where they all sleep together 😴 🙄 

Yeah I smell a rat on The Thinker's "family".  When he first took that girl back to the bedroom, I was waiting for the other wives to roll out sleeping bags on the living room floor!  I was glad they explained about going to the "guest room" but when they added that it was in "another part of the house" - that's it 😄. I've been in plenty of 3 bedroom tiny houses and there's no other part of the house - he's just having sex where the kid and the two wives can hear him 😖. Then I started wondering about who makes the bed and changes the sheets afterwards - I'm sure he'll have lots to think about - is it the old wives' job to welcome the new one, or is that part of her initiation into their "family"?  And then if things work out will she be joining the other three in their little bed?  They're not making any sense but they tell a good tale - I'll give them that 😄

As for Boat Boy - he says he's barely spent any time alone with his young woman - an hour here, an hour there.  But they've had sex 😂. Let's hear it for Captain Romance!

New guy's a creep.  That's all.

Edited June 14, 2022 by princelina

[Jeanne222]

Nick is a real strange one and the giddy young girl.  

[CSunshine76]

Am I to understand the new guy Marcus, the serial cheater, is an elected official in Ohio? Who has his family residing on Florida? Yeah, that’s not suspicious at all.  Call me crazy, I expect my elected officials, particularly local officials, to you know, LIVE LOCALLY! How is he going to survive being on this show and outing his quite unconventional life? Dude clearly just wants to be able to screw any and everyone. 

[Lady of nod]

What am I watching and why? I didn’t think these men could get any sleezier than Dmitri or Bernie (rip) but I was wrong. A whole new crop of disgusting horn dogs and their pathetic wives has been found . What is wrong with these women? I had trouble figuring out how Kody Brown managed to suck in and keep 4 -well 3 now- wives, but it was all under the guise of the cult they were raised in. These people have no excuse.

Of course I’ll keep watching because I’m all in for a train wreck, and nothing would make me happier than Roberta’s misery. And I am enjoying seeing Danielle torture her pos husband.

[South]

1 hour ago, princelina said:

Or thinks he is - their conversations don't go beyond, "Miss, you, love you, you're special, my king". They don't even know each other.

Yeah I smell a rat on The Thinker's "family".  When he first took that girl back to the bedroom, I was waiting for the other wives to roll out sleeping bags on the living room floor!  I was glad they explained about going to the "guest room" but when they added that it was in "another part of the house" - that's it 😄. I've been in plenty of 3 bedroom tiny houses and there's no other part of the house - he's just having sex where the kid and the two wives can hear him 😖. Then I started wondering about who makes the bed and changes the sheets afterwards - I'm sure he'll have lots to think about - is it the old wives' job to welcome the new one, or is that part of her initiation into their "family"?  And then if things work out will she be joining the other three in their little bed?  They're not making any sense but they tell a good tale - I'll give them that 😄

As for Boat Boy - he says he's barely spent any time alone with his young woman - an hour here, an hour there.  But they've had sex 😂. Let's hear it for Captain Romance!

New guy's a creep.  That's all.

Im not sure where The Thinker and his women live, and I haven’t seen the exterior of their home, but maybe there is a finished basement.  Or perhaps the garage has been converted to a livable space.  Orrrrrrrrr,  maybe after the (ahem) communion has concluded, they all pile into the bed together like a bunch of hamsters.

[South]

2 minutes ago, South said:

Im not sure where The Thinker and his women live, and I haven’t seen the exterior of their home, but maybe there is a finished basement.  Or perhaps the garage has been converted to a livable space.  Orrrrrrrrr,  maybe after the (ahem) communion has concluded, they all pile into the bed together like a bunch of hamsters.

Also, if I referred to Partner South as “my king”, he would pack up and move out.

[Jeanne222]

Danielle loves torturing Roberta.  The look on her face.  She sure is looking for a partner for herself to feel her pain and make Roberta miserable with her new sister wife!

[xwordfanatik]

Why does Ick insist on wearing that stupid cowboy hat and those boots on their excursions?  He looks like a dorky dumbass (which he is, actually, besides being a despicable ugly horndog.)  

Yep, Dannielle is loving twisting that jealousy knife into Bert.  Poor scheming little Bert deserves it.

[South]

11 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Danielle’s red dress needs to be burned.

I’ll be a day late watching again this week, so I don’t know what you’re talking about.  However, I can easily think of about 6 scenarios that would necessitate the burning of a red dress.  I’m curious to see the actual reason tonight!

[PrincessPurrsALot]

1 hour ago, xwordfanatik said:

Why does Ick insist on wearing that stupid cowboy hat and those boots on their excursions?  He looks like a dorky dumbass (which he is, actually, besides being a despicable ugly horndog.)  

Yep, Dannielle is loving twisting that jealousy knife into Bert.  Poor scheming little Bert deserves it.

Given Ddannielle's comment that Garrick is sensitive about his height, I suspect he enjoys the lift from the heel on the cowboy boots and thnks the hat adds height.  He neglects to consider that it ups his douche factor and makes him look like an even bigger fool than usual.  It's George Costanza and the Timberland boots in real life.

[Pepper Mostly]

9 hours ago, South said:

Im not sure where The Thinker and his women live, and I haven’t seen the exterior of their home, but maybe there is a finished basement.  Or perhaps the garage has been converted to a livable space.  Orrrrrrrrr,  maybe after the (ahem) communion has concluded, they all pile into the bed together like a bunch of hamsters.

I posited last week that this crew is polyamorous and are hiding behind "polygamy" to get their asses on TV. They all sleep in the same bed? The women are married to each other? The two original recipe women are really into each other and trawled for a "sister wife" so they could have some alone time. If Nick is sticking the old peen into a new wife, they are free to "explore". 

Nick is smug as fuck but Marcus? He's a whole new level of sleaze. He makes Garrick look like Mister Rogers. What a C-R-E-E-P. 

1 hour ago, xwordfanatik said:

Yep, Dannielle is loving twisting that jealousy knife into Bert.  Poor scheming little Bert deserves it.

And I am loving watching Dannnnnnnielle twist that knife. Didn't take her long to figure out how to do it, either. She and Lea will join forces (Lea already hates Bert) and, in the guise of being loving sister wives, will make her life hell. I'm hoping that then Dannnnnnielle and Lea will run off to Northampton and open a bookstore cafe together. Leaving Ick and Bert to drown in their tears. 

Ick's tears. Oh my god. He is really a pathetic worm of a man. 

[magemaud]

Is Nick courting Sally Struthers as a new sister wife? 

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

All I could think of when Garrick and Dannnnielle where doing their talking heads and he is in his maroon pants was this picture below. He is such a freaking cry baby. I guess April doesn't have a full length mirror and some extra strength spanx. Boatman is creepy and the other 2 are just using polygamy as an excuse to get laid

[Jade Foxx]

7 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

Danielle loves torturing Roberta.  The look on her face.  She sure is looking for a partner for herself to feel her pain and make Roberta miserable with her new sister wife!

Danielle will NEVER forgive Bert and Ick for having quickie sex in Mexico while she went to put on her pajamas! 😈

[Booger666]

They need to change the name from “Seeking Sister Wife” to “A bunch of A-holes and Lea”.  And seriously, it’s beyond belief to me that any of these guys can get laid without having to pay for it.  They are all such ass hats and have the sex appeal of a bi-directionally sick naked mole rat.  

Edited June 14, 2022 by Booger666

[Morgalisa]

I like Lea. I don't think she will be around long. Garrick won't be able to get it up for anyone else after Bert puts the Sobbin Brown tears of guilt on him. I'm trying to find someone else I like. But they all seem extremely awkward or cringy/creepy. Boat Boy's wife is not a  happy camper. Trouble is a brewing there.

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

Yeah, I can't imagine Lea is going to stick around for sobbing Garrick, plus it seems like there is no chemistry. I love her eye rolling of the Bert talk

[waterytart]

What do you all think about Danielle expressing doubt about a third wife?

[Lady of nod]

1 hour ago, waterytart said:

What do you all think about Danielle expressing doubt about a third wife?

I think she’s about to ruin the best part of the show. Stay strong Danielle- we’re all here for you giving Bert and creepy husband a taste of the hell they’ve put you through. 

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Creepy Nick and Daniel have the world's most awkward filmed date - that sure gets them in the mood.  The conversation is totally stilted.  Neither seems comfortable at all.  Nick doesn't think Danielle knows what she's getting into.  Sounds like time to have sex with your latest while your wives hang out in the other room. 

Boatboy buys all of his shirts two sizes too small.  Not that he has issues or anything.  He is just very comfortable when his shirts cut off all circulation.  

Poor Garrick is so in love with a woman he can barely communicate with.  His love runs deep.  Oh wait, maybe it's his tear ducts that run deep.  He's a damn fountain.  Such a surprise that Roberta lives in some out of way place.  There are no red flags showing; nothing that would make you think she is just trying to get to the US.  It is twu wuv. 

[Adeejay]

Danielle seems to be the one pushing for another wife.  Shades of Meri Brown. Garrick doesn’t appear to be the least bit interested in Lea. As a matter of fact, he seems to have lost weight and is quite subdued.

When Steve admitted to having relations with his new lady, Brenda winced. Clearly, she doesn’t want to share her husband. Now she knows how his ex-wife feels. Steve isn’t a bad looking man and he seems to have money. I hate to say it, but I don’t think his ladies are conventionally attractive. 

Edited June 15, 2022 by Adeejay

[magemaud]

2 hours ago, PrincessPurrsALot said:

The conversation is totally stilted. 

I lost track of the number of times she nodded her head vigorously and said “yeah” to Nick’s rambling word salad 

[magemaud]

When the two sisterwives (don’t remember their names) were going on and on about Nick’s “one on one date” with the pudgy young blonde, I thought someone had sat on my remote and accidentally turned the channel to “The Bachelor.” 

[SilverLake0315]

8 hours ago, PrincessPurrsALot said:

Poor Garrick is so in love with a woman he can barely communicate with.  His love runs deep.  Oh wait, maybe it's his tear ducts that run deep.  He's a damn fountain.  Such a surprise that Roberta lives in some out of way place.  There are no red flags showing; nothing that would make you think she is just trying to get to the US.  It is twu wuv. 

What was with the ennnnnnndless shots of the two of them sniffling, snotting, and not even talking? Good lord, show. Move. On.

[xwordfanatik]

Ick needs to burn those red pants.  His taste in clothes REALLY sucks.

28 minutes ago, SilverLake0315 said:

What was with the ennnnnnndless shots of the two of them sniffling, snotting, and not even talking? Good lord, show. Move. On.

Just pack it up and move to Brazil, you dumb jackass.  Jeez, he's pathetic.

[PrincessPurrsALot]

7 hours ago, magemaud said:

I lost track of the number of times she nodded her head vigorously and said “yeah” to Nick’s rambling word salad 

She'll be perfect for him.  He'll spend his day doing the deep thinking for all of them (that is, watching soaps and talk shows, skimming an article in a Popular Science or National Geographic Kids) then he can pontificate while she makes dinner.  She'll nod and say "yeah" whenever he drops some oh so deep thoughts on her. Examples:  Gerbils have tails.  Time is a continuum or so we think.  Tree bark protects trees. Molecules are too small to see with the human eye.  See, I too deserve several women who pay my bills and take care of all my needs.  I have all of the best knowledge to drop! 

[applewood]

15 hours ago, Adeejay said:

Danielle seems to be the one pushing for another wife.  Shades of Meri Brown. Garrick doesn’t appear to be the least bit interested in Lea. As a matter of fact, he seems to have lost weight and is quite subdued.

When Steve admitted to having relations with his new lady, Brenda winced. Clearly, she doesn’t want to share her husband. Now she knows how his ex-wife feels. Steve isn’t a bad looking man and he seems to have money. I hate to say it, but I don’t think his ladies are conventionally attractive. 

When they were at the winery and he was kissing April it seemed like a creepy daddy/daughter vibe. Isn't she only 21 and he's 42?

Also, I can't remember if they mentioned it or not but does Steve have kids by his ex wife or by Brenda? Are his kids the ones we keep seeing in the previews that say something like " My father's lifestyle completely creeps me out!"

[princelina]

7 hours ago, xwordfanatik said:

Ick needs to burn those red pants.  His taste in clothes REALLY sucks.

Just pack it up and move to Brazil, you dumb jackass.  Jeez, he's pathetic.

Haha let's see how long old Bert stays "in love" once he shows up on her doorstep and tells her they're staying in Brazil 😂

32 minutes ago, applewood said:

Also, I can't remember if they mentioned it or not but does Steve have kids by his ex wife or by Brenda? Are his kids the ones we keep seeing in the previews that say something like " My father's lifestyle completely creeps me out!"

I think they must be - The Thinker only has one kid in the house, we know Garrick's and Sidian's kids, and the creepy elected official's family is black.  Am I missing anyone?

[South]

20 hours ago, magemaud said:

I lost track of the number of times she nodded her head vigorously and said “yeah” to Nick’s rambling word salad 

Oh good gravy!  She was nodding so quickly, chest heaving, I wondered if she thought he was about to propose to her.

[South]

Okay, so I’m finally watching Mondays ep.  If anyone ever uses the word “submit” and “relationship” in the same sentence while referring to me, I will throat-punch them.

It’s true that Ick doesn’t seem interested in Lea.  I can’t remember the backstory of their blessed convergence, but I wonder if he already had a relationship of some sort with Bert before broaching the subject with Dddd.  He doesn’t seem icky in the way I thought last season.  I figured he wanted new, um, goodies.  Any new goodies.  But it seems that he would be overjoyed to simply have Bert.  I mean Lea is RIGHT THERE!  He’s still just so repulsive.  When they were on their way to the air b&b, he was talking about Ddddds earlier jealousies and misgivings and said something about ‘not harboring negative…blah blah blah.’  But Bert?  Bert’s second thoughts and discomfort require the utmost gentle touch.  And for all that is reasonable, why have neither of the love-doves learned the others language? Dang this show makes me want to kick something.  Oh, Lea, she isn’t sub consciously jealous.  Honey, it’s front and center.

Marcus is a special kind of special.  I wonder if the women-folk are down with adding and sharing because it gets his stunted brain and body out of their faces for a bit.  Again, what’s with dragging all of those children onto the screen.  Possessing a woman and the testing of waters are not want I want to hear coming out of his mouth.

Boat Boy.  Schmarmy

[candall]

I'm just now watching it, too.

I had completely forgotten that Roberta and Danielle and Horseface don't have a common language and they're using that little Sharper Image gizmo to conduct their romance.  LOLOLOL  I guess they wouldn't find the phrases they need in Berlitz For Beginners.

We seriously need to meet and live chat this thing--it is rich with fuckery.

More later.

[South]

To add to the stupid fact that stupid Bert and stupid Ick haven’t learned one another’s language, what was up with Ick using chimpanzee-trainer-level sign language to tell Bert “you (sniff sniff)… are…my…heart?  I have to go outside in my pjs to find a tree stump to kick.

[South]

25 minutes ago, candall said:

I'm just now watching it, too.

I had completely forgotten that Roberta and Danielle and Horseface don't have a common language and they're using that little Sharper Image gizmo to conduct their romance.  LOLOLOL  I guess they wouldn't find the phrases they need in Berlitz For Beginners.

We seriously need to meet and live chat this thing--it is rich with fuckery.

More later.

For the first time ever, I tried to “live type” last night, (I was watching Mondays episode).  I learned something about myself.  Apparently I can’t type while my mouth is hanging open.  Who knew?