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AmandaPanda

S03.E18: It Isn't What You Think

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Rattled by surprising news, Bay makes an effort to be friends with Tank. When Bay offers to be moral support for Tank as he meets his father for dinner, she finds that she may have bitten off more than she can chew. Toby continues to stir things up with Lily, yet a conflict regarding a make-up test for Sharee raises unwanted confrontation between the two. Meanwhile, Daphne and Travis make life-changing decisions when they find out their admissions results from Gallaudet University.

 

Art: "It Isn't What You Think" by Christopher Willard (2009).

 

I'm going to guess Bay goes with Tank when he tells his dad that he de-pledged the frat? I will roll my eyes incredibly hard if that is the case.  

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Daphne really annoyed me in this episode.  And apparently it's not enough for her to go all bad girl, they also have to give her a new love interest?

 

I do like Toby with the British teacher though.  I hope we get more of them.

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Everyone loves Daphne, she has hypnotic hair.

 

I hope she gets caught on a parole violation and has to spend her summer before college in jail.

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They seemed to leave the spray paint cans on site, and they weren't wearing gloves-- could easily have left their prints and thus be caught. It's very in character for Daphne to act this way, though. She has that good girl veneer, but she's a wildcard and has always had bad judgment and low impulse control.

 

Hated the anger-leading-to-fucking trope before, still hate it now. Toby and Lily gross me out. It was nice that she at least had a reason other than sheer cussedness for not wanting to give kids second chances, but I still find her and now Toby gross.

 

Loved the moment when Bay got to be the "good kid" to "aimless older brother" in front of her mom, even if it was actually a lie. But I don't buy, either, that she wouldn't tell her parents about the aunt's aneurysm and the possible hereditary nature of it. I will say that which ever way they go, I'll believe it, because I know two people who had family history of aneurysms but who themselves did not inherit it. So either way is credible to me.

 

Tank's dad was played by Jerry of Parks and Rec! It was shocking that he was such a dick and a crappy father! I don't know if I believe Tank liked the vegetarian food or the meditation, but if he did, then more power to him.

 

Were Kathryn and John wearing matching outfits in the beginning of the episode?

 

Emmett was petulant and I don't like that side of him. I hope it's not going to be a thing where he's jealous of Tank. They really need to stop thinking triangles are interesting, and just work shit out so the show doesn't get swallowed by petty crap.

 

I wish Melody was my next door neighbor and my sister and on every committee I ever joined or will join in the future.

 

I feel bad for Travis because he really doesn't believe he's wanted by anyone and he is not lying around moping but is at least trying to figure stuff out. He's not just acting out like Daphne or wallowing like Emmett does when Emmett's having a bad day. He has real problems and he's at least trying, even if he's kind of defeatist at the same time. I believe him more than I believe a lot of other characters on TV, even when he's annoying. I get where he's coming from.

 

I really wish I trusted the show to keep Wes and Regina out of each others' pants, but I don't.

Edited by possibilities

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Everyone loves Daphne, she has hypnotic hair.

 

I hope she gets caught on a parole violation and has to spend her summer before college in jail.

 

And then has to get a job to pay back every penny in property damage.

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I think Toby and Sharee have good chemistry. I get that Toby was all offended at being accused of having something going with one of his players, but I kind of hope the show goes there after she graduates because they're only a year apart and we've seen much more inappropriate relationships on this show. Although, I do like Toby with the teacher. Actually, Toby's had chemistry with every woman he comes into contact with that isn't a relative, so as long as he's happy I don't care who he's with.

 

Deanne Bray! Yay! I loved her on Heroes. I knew it was only a matter of time before she showed up here. Although, I am surprised at how quickly Melanie talked her into the satellite school.I guess they want to get all the Deaf characters into Gallaudet without having them all move to DC. 

 

Daphne really annoyed me in this episode.  And apparently it's not enough for her to go all bad girl, they also have to give her a new love interest?

 

 

And she's making out with Travis in the promo! Again! Which is likely to screw up the one good thing he's got going for him. Seriously, world, stop toying with Travis's emotions! 

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This episode was annoying to me. It had all of the things that annoy me about this show.

Daphne pity party? Check.
Daphne shoves her tongue down a new throat? Check.
Blink and you'll miss him Emmett? Check
Bay's issues being glossed over? Low parental involvement/D.W and Lea just showed up for the paycheck? Yup and yup.

I did like the fact that Daphne called Bay her sister so effortlessly. Toby and the uptight teacher are okay, but I hope he ends up with Sharee. They have awesome chemistry. I hope they're just biding their time so that they don't have a PLL situation on their hands.

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Is Nacho really supposed to be some kind of badass? He looked so dorkily gleeful when he was vandalising that job site with Daphne (and doesn't he have a crew? Why was it just him and Daphne? Oh right, it was so that the two of them can start sucking face). It's kind of hilarious that he was painted as some kind of scary criminal, when really, he's just one of those idealists who cares a lot about his community.

 

And now they've inadvertantly helped that crooked politician by getting those other contractors out of the picture. Way to go.

 

I like Toby and all, but I'm ready for him to shut up about Iceland already. Maybe it's because he still looks about 12 years old even with the facial hair, but I can't take him that seriously as an adult authority figure. That must be why I don't find the idea of him and Sharee all that objectionable. He can't be "that sleazy old guy perving on young girls" when he's still pretty much a kid. That and Sharee comes off so grown up. For a second there I forgot who she was (we haven't seen her in a while!) and was like "who's this woman? Some teacher?"

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I fast-forwarded through Daphne's scenes.

 

I hate the English teacher. I agree that Toby and Sharee would be good together, despite him being a couple of years older than her. Maybe the show will "go there" once she graduates.

 

I hate when Emmett acts the way he did towards Bay when she told him about the dinner with Tank. Why not talk about your feelings instead of getting all dismissive and angry? Last time he did that, he got wasted and had sex with Simone. If I was Bay, I'd be very upset that he's still exhibiting this type of behavior.

 

Melody's boyfriend is hot, and I kind of want to see Wes naked. 

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I think Toby and Sharee have good chemistry. I get that Toby was all offended at being accused of having something going with one of his players, but I kind of hope the show goes there after she graduates because they're only a year apart and we've seen much more inappropriate relationships on this show. Although, I do like Toby with the teacher. Actually, Toby's had chemistry with every woman he comes into contact with that isn't a relative, so as long as he's happy I don't care who he's with.

I would love to see Toby and Sharee together. Of all the potential women, she's the one who absolutely won't put up with any of his bulls**t. Plus, the teacher has to be at least in her mid-twenties. She shouldn't be jumping into bed with a 19- or 20-year-old. That's just a little bit creepy to me.

 

Tank's dad was played by Jerry of Parks and Rec! It was shocking that he was such a dick and a crappy father! I don't know if I believe Tank liked the vegetarian food or the meditation, but if he did, then more power to him.

 

That scene was super realistic to me. I didn't go Greek in college, but I remember seeing the utter meltdowns people had around bid day. There was one girl I went to high school with who said she might as well drop out of college if she didn't get into the sorority all her female family members had been in. It wasn't something I ever really understood, but that scene was completely believable. 

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I thought Emmett had every right to be annoyed. He got into college and wanted to celebrate with his girlfriend and instead she's going out with her ex? Just stupid. And what was with Bay confiding in Tank but not Emmett, who was nothing but supportive when she lost Angelo? Makes no sense. Generally I don't understand why they are keeping Tank around as a character.

 

Daphne continues to annoy. She needs to go to jail.

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I would love to see Toby and Sharee together. Of all the potential women, she's the one who absolutely won't put up with any of his bulls**t. Plus, the teacher has to be at least in her mid-twenties. She shouldn't be jumping into bed with a 19- or 20-year-old. That's just a little bit creepy to me.

 

Yes, this!  That's what I kept thinking - that Toby is only a year or two older than Sharee, since he graduated last year, and she's graduating this year.   Their age difference is nothing compared to the one between Toby and the teacher.  And he's not in a position of authority (teacher, coach) so there actually wouldn't be anything wrong with Toby and Sharee dating.

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I don't think Toby has chemistry with either the teacher or Sheri.  Is he even divorced yet?  He needs to work on himself first before he gets into which would just be a rebound relationship.   I would love Toby to actually become a teacher.  He can still DJ on the side.

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I like the idea of Toby being a teacher, too. He can even teach music, if he wants. I think part of why I reacted so much to Bay calling him aimless to their mom is that I'm really not over John laying him off so he could get unemployment. He had a perfectly adequate nepotism-acquired job, and I don't see how he needed to quit in order to pursue DJing, either. It's not like he's got a job as a DJ, or is in school to become a DJ or is actually DOING ANYTHING to become a DJ. Why can't he also work at the car wash? It's not even like he's a musician with rehearsals. He's basically just bumming around, which I don't even think is morally wrong if you can afford it, but something about how easily very wealthy John the Republican collaborated to get him unnecessarily on unemployment, just grates.

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He specifically asked John to fire him because if he quits, he can't get unemployment. So, although they didn't show him filling out the paperwork, I think it's fair to assume that yes, he's living off his unemployment benefits, instead of working at the car wash to pay his bills.

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I hate when Emmett acts the way he did towards Bay when she told him about the dinner with Tank. Why not talk about your feelings instead of getting all dismissive and angry? Last time he did that, he got wasted and had sex with Simone. If I was Bay, I'd be very upset that he's still exhibiting this type of behavior.

 

There wasn't anything wrong with the way Emmett reacted to Bay's news that she was going out with Tank and his dad.  Was he supposed to be happy about it?  Just because he's acted out in the past (and he was 100% wrong when he was all angry and moody in the past with her way back in Season 1) doesn't mean that he can never be angry or not like something that she says or does again. Anger is a natural human emotion.  Mishandling anger in the past doesn't mean you can never be angry again.  What's important is how he handles that anger.  He wasn't dismissive either.  He listened to her explanations as to why she wanted to go, he just didn't agree with them.  He's allowed.  He didn't call her names, start yelling, stomp off, or slam a door in her face.  He didn't even try the cliched jealous boyfriend thing of telling the girlfriend that she wasn't allowed to go.  He knows Bay and knew that nothing he could say was going to stop her so the discussion was over.  What else was he supposed to do? Lie and say that he was okay with it when he wasn't? Agree to go with them since Bay was claiming that Emmett owed Tank something too?  I agreed 100% with Emmett there: leave him out of it.  He apologized last week and Tank can decide if he wants to accept that or not.  

 

And speaking of owing someone something, Bay doesn't owe Tank anything.  She has apologized profusely multiple times for what she did.  Again, Tank can choose to accept it and move on or hate her forever, but that's all on him.  He doesn't get to mistreat her when she's coming to visit her brother.  She should never give anyone that kind of power because they can potentially hold you in their figurative debt forever where nothing you do will ever be enough.  Thankfully, Tank's seemingly not going that route.  

 

"Angry" and "dismissive" are words that applied more to Tank last night than Emmett.  He was the one throwing out insults and false accusations (It is NOT on Bay that he quit the frat.  He did that all on his own.  No one asked him to).  And then taking that casserole dish from her and throwing the door closed in her face?  Without letting Toby know that she was there when that was the only reason she was there in the first place?  Extremely dismissive.  Yeah, Bay cheated, blah, blah, blah.  It doesn't give him the right to act like an ass.  And Toby really should have given her a head's up.  Not ask her permission, but just a "Hey, Tank's staying at my place, so if it's too awkward, keep your distance."

 

I'm really tired of Tank's pain and his permanent status as victim.   Yeah, he has the right to be mad, but the one episode earlier when he found out was enough for his character.  He's not a character on the same level of Bay who the audience needed to see work through her pain and anger at being cheated on.  But last night was the second episode in a row of lonely, drunk, victimized, poor, poor Tank.  And he even got a mean daddy this week.  Enough.  And it seems to me that he's more mad that Bay doesn't like him romantically than he is about the cheating.  Just last week he was all "How's Bay?" & "I should call her," but this week he's all mad again.  And by the end of the episode he's cool with Bay again and being the one to listen about her medical fears.  How's he going to react when Emmett shows up again?  Start calling her names again and slamming door in her face?  Bay should be more worried about Tank's Jekyll & Hyde personality than Emmett.  He has showed this split personality before when he got all enraged because Bay didn't want to sleep with him and when she was telling him about Ty.  Tank just seems to be an unhappy person.  He didn't seem happy even before he knew Bay, so maybe he should work on that.  Hopefully off-screen.

 

Blaming Bay for the current upheaval in his life is not exactly smart either, but understandable if I cared about his character.  His life would still be the exact same if she had just broken up with him and not cheated.  He still would have quit the frat and everything else that followed would still have occurred.  But I guess Bay would still be at fault for not liking him enough.  Tank sometimes acts like he's never been dumped before.  Is Bay the first girl he's ever been with? Or is he just so awesome that no one ever dumped him before and he was the one doing the dumping.  

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There wasn't anything wrong with the way Emmett reacted to Bay's news that she was going out with Tank and his dad.  Was he supposed to be happy about it?  Just because he's acted out in the past (and he was 100% wrong when he was all angry and moody in the past with her way back in Season 1) doesn't mean that he can never be angry or not like something that she says or does again. Anger is a natural human emotion.  Mishandling anger in the past doesn't mean you can never be angry again.  What's important is how he handles that anger.  He wasn't dismissive either.  He listened to her explanations as to why she wanted to go, he just didn't agree with them.  He's allowed.  He didn't call her names, start yelling, stomp off, or slam a door in her face.  He didn't even try the cliched jealous boyfriend thing of telling the girlfriend that she wasn't allowed to go.  He knows Bay and knew that nothing he could say was going to stop her so the discussion was over.  What else was he supposed to do? Lie and say that he was okay with it when he wasn't? Agree to go with them since Bay was claiming that Emmett owed Tank something too?  I agreed 100% with Emmett there: leave him out of it.  He apologized last week and Tank can decide if he wants to accept that or not.  

 

 My issue isn't that he was angry; the situation was upsetting indeed.  He'd just received news of his acceptance into his dream University and wanted to celebrate with his girlfriend, but she'd already made plans to go to dinner with her Ex and his father. My issue is that he DID stomp off before the conversation was finished. Bay clearly wasn't done saying what she had to say, but Emmett was done hearing it, so he just dismissed her and stomped off angrily.  Emmett needs to work on the way he handles himself when things don't go his way, or else he'll experience an abundance of problems as a direct result in the future. That sort of behavior was already followed by a horrible decision at the peril of their relationship once, and  If I was Bay, I'd certainly take his reaction as a red flag. 

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They seemed to leave the spray paint cans on site, and they weren't wearing gloves-- could easily have left their prints and thus be caught.

 

That's what I was thinking the entire time they were doing it - all those fingerprints!  And she's on parole.   I can't help but hope she does get caught because she clearly hasn't learned anything, though it would undoubtedly cause even more work drama for Regina.  I hope there's no way Bay can get entangled in it though, seeing as how Daphne stole the paint from her.  (Nice to see how easily they all refer to each other as family now.)

 

We all know that for the show to continue, all the kids are going to end up at some local college; at least they're putting the effort in to establish how this deaf program will be established and run instead of "look, magical fictional college just appeared and has an amazing program for the deaf!".   I appreciate the effort.

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My issue isn't that he was angry; the situation was upsetting indeed.  He'd just received news of his acceptance into his dream University and wanted to celebrate with his girlfriend, but she'd already made plans to go to dinner with her Ex and his father. My issue is that he DID stomp off before the conversation was finished. Bay clearly wasn't done saying what she had to say, but Emmett was done hearing it, so he just dismissed her and stomped off angrily.  Emmett needs to work on the way he handles himself when things don't go his way, or else he'll experience an abundance of problems as a direct result in the future. That sort of behavior was already followed by a horrible decision at the peril of their relationship once, and  If I was Bay, I'd certainly take his reaction as a red flag.

 

I guess I just don't see the two situations as comparable at all.  That not liking that Bay was going to dinner with Tank and walking away is on the same level as the whole situation with his parents doesn't compute with me.  And it was a bit more complex than things simply not "going his way."  It's not as if he was pouting simply because he didn't get what he wanted.  If Bay had said she was going to dinner with her parents or Toby or Daphne and couldn't go out with him, his reaction wouldn't have been to pout and stomp his feet that he didn't get what he wanted.  He wasn't upset at not getting what he wanted, he was upset that his girlfriend couldn't go with him because she was going to dinner with her ex-boyfriend.  The ex-boyfriend last he heard still had feelings for her and was throwing punches at him.  It's a sticky situation.  At the end of the day, it was a meaningless argument.  Tank is no threat to Emmett and he knows that.  He's not going to run out and sleep with some other girl like before.  

 

I don't think there was anything else left to say.  He knew she was going to go so how was that conversation supposed to end? "Have fun honey. Call me when you get back from having dinner with your ex-boyfriend." Walking away was probably best for both as it just would have kept going back and forth.  They're still young and figuring out to handle those types of situations.  Hardly indicative of some menacing pattern of behavior that Bay needs to worry about.  Now if Emmett had gone and had sex with some other girl like before or calling her names or something, then I'd agree, but not in this instance.  And the whole thing was contrived nonsense anyway given the fact that Emmett disappeared from the rest of the episode after that.  None of that was about Emmett's character at all.  The show needed to show mean old Emmett being insensitive to poor Tank's pain and suffering at the hands of that harlot Bay and his fear about meeting his dad.  Like I said before, I'm sick of Tank.  He's a guest character who should be supporting the main characters, not getting his own story arcs.  

 

Tank's actions were much more disturbing to me.  Calling names and slamming doors in her face only to have a complete change of heart within the span of an episode.

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The ratings for the show are falling each week. Last night's episode only got 1.1 million viewers and a .4 share. This doesn't look good for renewal prospects.

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Bratty teenagers never fail to irritate me, and Daphne is no exception. And yeah that building site totally would have been unsecured like that.

 

But Bay and Daphne casually referring to each other as sisters makes me go awww. I’m a sap.

 

I love Toby’s dorky little hand gesture when he’s happy. If he could shave off that thing on his face, I could be on board with Toby 100% again.
 

 

I hate when Emmett acts the way he did towards Bay when she told him about the dinner with Tank. Why not talk about your feelings instead of getting all dismissive and angry? Last time he did that, he got wasted and had sex with Simone. If I was Bay, I'd be very upset that he's still exhibiting this type of behavior.

 

I can’t feel too bad for Bay here – she voluntarily took this pouty, moody, immature brat back. Whether or not he had a case (and I think he did – he got into college and his girlfriend was going out that night with her ex), the way he expresses his displeasure when things don't go his way always seems like a 5-year-old throwing a tantrum. Has there been a single episode since season 1 where Emmett didn't have that pained, constipated look on his face at least once an episode? Ugh.

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The ratings for the show are falling each week. Last night's episode only got 1.1 million viewers and a .4 share. This doesn't look good for renewal prospects.

 

I still think it'll be renewed. They might say it's coming back for a final season, but I definitely think it'll be back. ABC Family is supposed to announce renewals at the end of the summer. 

He specifically asked John to fire him because if he quits, he can't get unemployment. So, although they didn't show him filling out the paperwork, I think it's fair to assume that yes, he's living off his unemployment benefits, instead of working at the car wash to pay his bills.

 

This annoyed me so much. If you're on unemployment, you can't just flounder there forever. You have so many weeks where you're on it and you have to be putting in effort to get another job or they kick you off it. Trying to launch your DJ career isn't going to fly as evidence you're working toward gainful employment again. It made no sense for him to ask to be fired from a job that is only during the day anyway. 

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This was the first episode in a very long time that I did not enjoy. Mad Daphne does nothing but piss me off. I can't stand how she is treating Regina. Destroying property -- especially while on probation for doing another reckless act - is the height of stupidity. Did she think that using a tire iron - without gloves - to smash the window of the equipment was a brilliant thing to do to protest the project and her mother's involvement in it? It annoys me no end that she got into GU - and could apparently care less - and Travis did not. When she eventually gets caught - and she will - Senator Daddy isn't going to be able to bail her out of this legal fiasco. Talk about throwing away a bright, pre-med future. Idiot.

 

I really like how Toby cares so much about Sharee. I enjoy Sharee's character and hope that they keep her around. Toby and the British teacher = not too keen on the pairing.

 

I like Tank so I'm glad that they kept him around. He and Bay always worked better as friends.

 

I do love Melody and liked seeing her with her boyfriend.

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I realized again this episode that Tank's plucked eyebrows still bug me. Bay's are more natural than his.

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I never pictured Toby to be a one night stand type of guy, but after all he's been through I guess he needed a bit of fun. Still pretty random though. If he's so interested in investing in other peoples' future, why not be a guidance counselor for disadvantaged kids? It's annoying that Travis was turned down for the management position at the car wash (something that might have helped his application) in favor of Toby who threw it away the moment his marriage went sour.  It's hard for me to take the whole DJ career path he has chosen seriously when it comes off like a "Iceland was my spring break and that was all I did while I was there" phase. I hope they either get the DJ ball rolling or get him a new path.

 

I hate when Emmett acts the way he did towards Bay when she told him about the dinner with Tank. Why not talk about your feelings instead of getting all dismissive and angry? Last time he did that, he got wasted and had sex with Simone. If I was Bay, I'd be very upset that he's still exhibiting this type of behavior.

 

I was under the impression that their relationship was supposed to be more "mature" but with Bay having no college prospects (that we know of yet) and Emmmet moving forward to Gaulladet after graduation, I can't see them lasting in a long distance relationship if the insecurities are still there. I also agree about Tank being a bit of a jerk at the beginning of the episode to Bay. All of a sudden they're friends and she can confide in him again? I'd have preferred if Tank decided that he just couldn't deal with being friends and let that be her life lesson. It *is* possible to forgive someone but not have anything to do with them anymore also. In this show, not only do you get to cheat, you can go right back to the way things were while being the keeper of their secrets too. Please.

 

 

It annoys me no end that she got into GU - and could apparently care less - and Travis did not. When she eventually gets caught - and she will - Senator Daddy isn't going to be able to bail her out of this legal fiasco. Talk about throwing away a bright, pre-med future. Idiot.

 

I keep wondering when Regina is going start doing some parenting because she's doing a lousy job. It's one thing to mourn but if my daughter admitted to me that she got "really high" to my face and actually challenged me on it, that would send off some red flags to do an intervention and take action....but that's just me. Crazy apple, crazy, messed up tree.

Edited by Eri

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This is a very small and unimportant detail in the grand scheme of things, but it seemed pretty unreal to me that Bay could just call up a neurologist out of the blue, and book an appointment. Maybe I'm just used to the Canadian system, whereby you need a referral from a family or ER doctor, in order to see a specialist, and then you wait.

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I have to make appointments with my neurologist months in advance and I am a regular patient of his.  I never needed a referral, but that depends on someone's insurance/the doctor.  Either way, it definitely seemed odd that she could do that, especially without even explaining why she wanted the appointment.  I rolled my eyes at that one.

 

ETA: and plus with medical privacy, Bay could have called her doctor and they wouldn't tell her parents or anyone else.  Regardless, it didn't seem odd to me.

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I never have to go through a referring physician. My GP will give me a referral or make a referral if I ask, but it's not needed.  And the only type of doctor I've had to wait months for is strangely a dermatologist.  (Why do I need to wait 4-6 weeks to see you about a severe rash on my arm?)  But I just saw an orthopedist within a week of calling for my bad knee.

 

ETA: it does seem odd that she wouldn't tell Emmett or anyone else.  

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If you go through a website like ZocDoc, you can find hundreds of doctors of any specialty at your disposal. You just pick one with good reviews who has an opening when you need it (of course the best doctors might have longer wait times). So that didn't ring false to me at all. What does ring false is that a) Bay's parents didn't even casually wonder if the aneurysm might be hereditary, b) Bay isn't sharing any of this with said parents.

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This is a very small and unimportant detail in the grand scheme of things, but it seemed pretty unreal to me that Bay could just call up a neurologist out of the blue, and book an appointment. Maybe I'm just used to the Canadian system, whereby you need a referral from a family or ER doctor, in order to see a specialist, and then you wait.

 

I got the impression that she was calling the neurologist who had just operated on Angelo. Since he knows the aneurysm could be hereditary, he might have decided to do Bay a favor and give her an appointment to talk to her about it. Normally, she would definitely need referrals, but since her dad just died and he knows the details of the family history, he might just be really nice.

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Am I really going to be the only one to mention Garrett, the guy who got Travis a job? He looks like he could play a hot pirate! I want to see more of him. Also, where are these magical jobs that pay triple the minimum wage, provide full benefits, and don't require even a high school degree?

 

I remember when I really liked Daphne. Some of the things she did might have annoyed the hell out of me, but I still rooted for her. Unfortunately, this Daphne is a fucking idiot. I remember first watching the show and never thought Bay would be my favorite! I suppose it takes actively trying to sabotage your mother for me to draw the line.

 

I still like Tank, he's sweet. I just hope they stay friends and don't play up Emmett's jealousy to push a triangle there. 

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