S01.E03: Patience

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Quote

Nicky and Henry follow a lead involving a professor who may be able to help in their search for Zhilan. Meanwhile, as Althea's past comes back to haunt her, a squabble between Jin and Mei-Li points to bigger issues in their marriage. Elsewhere, Nicky steps in to help a young worker after learning of some suspicious activity happening at King Kwong's garment factory.

Promo:

Original air date: 4/21/21

[AnimeMania]

Faye has been going to Ryan for years and not getting any better, she goes to a real hospital for 10 minutes and they figure out what was wrong with her.

[tessaray]

I'm actually starting to be intrigued by the mystery of the swords. This episode felt more polished too.

Nicky, though. She seems awfully oblivious to things going on around her - unless it's directly related to the case of the week.

[memememe76]

The family stuff and the ongoing arc with swords are GREAT. The weekly cases? Less so. But I like that Nicky has her powers but she is not otherworldly and she is learning on the job. I did like how she got the Bro to confess with her wits than with her muscle. 

[Camera One]

They lucked out with this cast.  They have good chemistry with each other and are rather endearing in a cute kind of way.  

I'm glad Nicky is helping out at the restaurant.  So the mom does not want to accept charity from her children, but she is willing to borrow money from a stranger?  That is interesting... I hope we will see more.  At the end, was the dad right that repairing the fridge pretty much cost as much as buying a new one? 

This episode was sort of about Nicky and Ryan, so I was hoping they would work on a case together or something.  But they didn't actually have too many scenes together.  Nicky helping Ryan's patient was nice, but I don't see how that would have helped their relationship.  Maybe Nicky could have discovered (instead of being told) the various ways in which Ryan was helping people in the neighborhood, so she realized that Ryan wasn't avoiding her per se, but he really was busy.  It seems like Ryan is doing fine in the love department and is quite secure and comfortable with his sexuality, so does he really need Nicky's support anymore?  I had expected from the pilot that we would see Ryan dealing with all that, with Nicky's help but I guess not.

So Evan thinks Henry is a bad influence on Nicky?  Is he a lawyer or a police officer, being contacted about the break-in and getting access to the surveillance video?  I wonder if Henry really did learn how to pick a lock from Youtube, or he has a secret past of crime or something.

Finding the secret box in the professor's office was a bit too easy and fast, and the villain stealing another weapon was completely off-screen, which was weird.  I suppose having a professor who knows all about the weapons would provide too much info to Nicky, so he needed to be eliminated.

Why would Althea have connections to get into the party?  I guess we know her secret now.  Hopefully, Nicky will get to drop-kick her former boss in a future episode.

Nicky expected the CEO to know the name of a random worker in the factory?  Sending an assassin to kill Nicky was a tad overboard, but I guess that was needed for a fight scene.  Why not just have her arrested and charged for breaking and entering?  That would help to discredit Nicky's accusations.  Maybe they could have tied the factory to the Triad who was causing problems in Episode 1.  

Edited April 22, 2021 by Camera One

[ElectricBoogaloo]

One thing I liked about this episode was that Nicky ultimately solved the problem by non kung-fu means. I am totally fine with having kung fu in a show that's called kung fu, duh, but I like that Nicky isn't relying on that to fix everything. This time it was her shifu's lessons about patience that helped her in several different situations. I was really glad that Nicky finally realized that she couldn't just jump back into the same relationship that she used to have with Ryan because he's not the exact same person he was three years ago (and neither is she).

Part of me is not looking forward to Althea's story coming out eventually because it's clearly still too painful for her to deal with. But the other part of me is fine with that storyline because stuff like that happens every day and we need to shed as much light on it as possible.

I loved hearing more about the sword and the rest of the horcruxes, but I thought Zhilan was a little too hasty in killing the professor. He was the only expert on all the swords, history, and mythology so why not keep him around at least a few more days and see how much more information you could get out of him before getting rid of him?

It was nice to see that brief moment of sentimentality with Nicky's mom so we could understand why she was so insistent on keeping Jerry instead of buying a new refrigerator. Sometimes people have a hard time getting rid of the car that was around when their kids were growing up. In this case, it makes sense that her attachment is to the refrigerator since the kids basically grew up in the restaurant.

I bought a basic puzzle ring when I was in college. It was my version of fidget spinner because I could take it apart and put it back together whenever my hands needed something to do. But that puzzle box in the professor's office was a zillion times more complicated. The prop department did a nice job with that. I also loved Zhilan's giant door which had a similar design.

 

[TV Anonymous]

The title of the episode is Patience, something that I think I am running out of. 

• If Prof. Chau is an expert in Sinology, why is he in the Faculty of Southeast Asian Studies?
• Is it not terribly convenience that the one expert in the world who knows about the 8 magic weapons is a professor at Berkeley? Just a stone's throw away from San Francisco?
• Zhilian is wanted by the FBI for abducting U.S. citizen. Alright. What about the Ministry of Public Safety of China? They have no say as this is a suspected murderer on the loose?
• Unless somebody has significant resources - and by significant it means having their name listed on Forbes - who has that kind of mansion in Singapore?
• Who setup their manufacturing facility right next to their flagship store? 
• Why did Brett call the henchman? Calling the police would be more effective as Nicky clearly trespassed. Then, as a regular TV criminal, why must he explain all of his criminal deeds?

[possibilities]

8 hours ago, Camera One said:

At the end, was the dad right that repairing the fridge pretty much cost as much as buying a new one? 

A service call and spare parts (the hinge AND the compressor!) really could be quite pricey. I bought a new washing machine when the cost to repair my old one was very close to the cost of a new one. It's especially pricey if you have an old model of something, where parts are hard to find. And labor can run very high as well. Besides that, just based on my real-world experience (not something from the show), a new one would probably save them enough money in electricity costs alone to pay for itself in a short period of time, compared to continuing to run the old one-- even aside from the repair costs. It's shocking how much more efficient newer models are.

 

 

[Starchild]

While I was mildly impressed that the writers worked an accurate use of "apocrypha" into the dialogue, I have to admit this show has disappointed me.

The other day I watched the pilot of "Mare of Easttown", and I was so impressed by the depth and richness of the world-building, acting, writing and characterization there that when it came time to watch this episode, I knew it would be my last. I wasn't expecting a lot, but in comparison it is just so inferior I can't justify any more of my time.

For those of you this show is important to, I hope it continues to meet or even exceed your expectations.

Peace out.

[Camera One]

31 minutes ago, TV Anonymous said:

• If Prof. Chau is an expert in Sinology, why is he in the Faculty of Southeast Asian Studies?

That door was an odd choice.  I think they said Prof Chau was visiting Berkeley to give a talk, and he was only given a temporary office, so maybe that office was where they had extra space to put him?

6 hours ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

It was nice to see that brief moment of sentimentality with Nicky's mom so we could understand why she was so insistent on keeping Jerry instead of buying a new refrigerator. Sometimes people have a hard time getting rid of the car that was around when their kids were growing up. In this case, it makes sense that her attachment is to the refrigerator since the kids basically grew up in the restaurant.

That makes a lot of sense.  I wasn't sure what they were trying to get at in that scene.  I thought she was just being cheap and proud.

[paigow]

3 hours ago, TV Anonymous said:

The title of the episode is Patience, something that I think I am running out of. 

• If Prof. Chau is an expert in Sinology, why is he in the Faculty of Southeast Asian Studies?
• Is it not terribly convenience that the one expert in the world who knows about the 8 magic weapons is a professor at Berkeley? Just a stone's throw away from San Francisco?
• Zhilian is wanted by the FBI for abducting U.S. citizen. Alright. What about the Ministry of Public Safety of China? They have no say as this is a suspected murderer on the loose?
• Unless somebody has significant resources - and by significant it means having their name listed on Forbes - who has that kind of mansion in Singapore?
• Who setup their manufacturing facility right next to their flagship store? 
• Why did Brett call the henchman? Calling the police would be more effective as Nicky clearly trespassed. Then, as a regular TV criminal, why must he explain all of his criminal deeds?

It was a temporary office.

Calling the cops exposes the shredding bin of anti-union evil as evidence.

Edited April 22, 2021 by paigow

[TV Anonymous]

2 hours ago, paigow said:

It was a temporary office.

Then Prof. Chau actually created the secret storage space in his temporary office?

[possibilities]

 

11 hours ago, Camera One said:

Nicky expected the CEO to know the name of a random worker in the factory? 

She wasn't a random worker-- she was the union organizer. That is the one person the bosses would have their eyes on the most out of the entire workforce.

[paigow]

13 minutes ago, TV Anonymous said:

Then Prof. Chau actually created the secret storage space in his temporary office?

Just like all his other stops at Yale, Stanford, USC etc....

[tennisgurl]

The sword plot and the family stuff is all still really interesting, but they really need to do more to make these cases of the week work. The two so far haven't been awful or anything, and I like that Nicky is using smarts as well as fighting to stop bad guys, but I feel like with just one or two more workings they could be a lot cleaner. Especially as Nicky keeps just running into these situations without any kind of plan, and things always seem to just kind of fall into place. I also wonder if Nicky will eventually get a reputation for helping people and they will start coming to her for help? Or will she just keep running into random people with problems she can solve as she goes about her day? The CFO really went full supervillain, slowly poisoning the union organizer in a plot to fire her, hiring hitmen, even falling for the old "expose my evil plan over the speaker for everyone to hear" trick. 

I am glad that Nicky realized that she couldn't just pop back into her old life like she never left, she was gone for awhile and a lot has changed. Sometimes it does feel like Nicky is so focused on either the swords or her crime of the week and is mostly around her friends and family because she needs their help, so its nice that she is making more of an effort and is willing to put in the effort. All of the actors are really great and have very natural chemistry, so it goes a long way to helping establish their relationships. Nicky should also maybe spend a bit more time in the world again in general, she is really behind on anything not involving Kung Fu and that could hurt her in the future. 

I like hearing more about the swords, but I wish we had gotten to see them taking the new sword, and I think that Zhilan made a mistake killing the professor so quickly. He is apparently the worlds foremost authority on these swords and their history and seemed like he was willing to cooperate with her. Killing him now seems like a real waste of a valuable resource.  

[paigow]

Nicky is a less polished / street smart "Equalizer". Henry & Nicky are the "Indy & Marion" proxies.

The ex-boyfriend has a huge blindspot.. Henry is the shady guy when the video clearly shows Nicky participating of her own free will.

[Stardancer Supreme]

Nicky does need to slow down on the "flying by the seat of her pants" style of crime solving.  Her naivete is quite stunning for being away for such a little amount of time.  She should be at least aware of security cameras that are everywhere.

Any CEO of any company wouldn't know about the workers unless they make themselves known to them. 

I'm glad that Althea's issue was not criminal in nature.  I have a feeling that her fiancee's milk isn't that clean either. Poor Althea!

I'm not liking Evan trying to "protect" Nicky in her shenanigans. Henry may have something he's trying to hide that won't look good in the light. I like Henry more as Nicky's sidekick, and yes you can learn how to pick locks on Youtube. You just have to pick locks on a regular basis to get good at it!

Ryan doesn't have a partnership with a medical lab to run blood tests? 

Mama and Baba Shen have a lot of issues just bubbling to the surface with Nicky's return.  Now that the family is in debt, I want to see how far down the rabbit hole goes in how they separately have been trying to deal with that reality. 

Zhilan did kill the professor too quickly. That will bite her later as she seems to be gathering the weapons at a good clip.  I wonder when Nicky will realize the clues to the other weapons is probably burned into her hand?  At least start looking into Shifu Zhang's family to try to keep up with Zhilan!

Edited April 22, 2021 by Stardancer Supreme

[akg]

13 hours ago, Camera One said:

Sending an assassin to kill Nicky was a tad overboard, but I guess that was needed for a fight scene

 I felt a little bit bad for the assassin. He was probably told it would be an easy job, just show up and kill the tiny Chinese woman.

It's good that Nicky isn't super jaded but she's being way too naïve in expecting the bad guys to do the right thing just because she confronts them (the boyfriend and casino owner last week, the owner and actual bad guy (I forget his title) this week).

[thuganomics85]

Yeah, while these "cases of the week" aren't the worst I've seen by far, right now, they are the weakest part of the show.  It just feels like minimum effort is being put into them and they mainly are by the numbers.  It doesn't help that it usually ends with Nicky barging in without a plan, and while it naturally always works out, it arguably puts other people in danger, had this show had more realistic outcomes.  To be fair though, a lot of these shows start out this way but get better once they fade how that aspect or establish an actual team for the hero, so I'm hoping this is normal early first season "figuring stuff out" stuff.

That said, despite only seeing him for about two minutes of screen time, I was strangely invested in Eddie not being part of the crime and I'm glad he wasn't.  His sad "Brometheus!" was great.  Poor guy just wanted to sell some overpriced shirts and hats: there was no need to start poisoning union reps or trying to assassinate potential whistleblowers, Bradley!

Wish we had more scenes with Nicky and Ryan, but I'm glad they're making steps to go forward.

Well, the mystery surrounding Althea's phone calls seems to be going down a much darker path than what I was expected.  Not sure if I'm ready for that on a mainly light show so far, but I do think the actress is good and will be able to make it work.

Evan is suspicious about Henry, now?  I guess Henry has been a bit "too good to be true" so far, but he's really only been following Nicky's lead, so I don't see him being anything more than that... yet?

The scene with the parents and "Jerry" was well done.

Zhilan is an effective enough of a main villain and I'm curious to see how all of this stuff with the swords play out, but I also thought she killed off the professor way too quickly.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

5 hours ago, thuganomics85 said:

His sad "Brometheus!" was great.  Poor guy just wanted to sell some overpriced shirts and hats: there was no need to start poisoning union reps or trying to assassinate potential whistleblowers, Bradley!

Ha, yes, that moment was hilarious! His genuine disappointment in his bro when all he wanted to do was sell $200 sweatshirts - sadface!

As someone who lives in the Bay Area, I feel compelled to note that Nicky's eagerness to get to this party in Oakland was extremely uncharacteristic. Most people who live in SF would rather walk through fire than leave the city, especially to go to the East Bay (even if it's to solve a crime).

[Sakura12]

I'm glad Ryan finally told Nicky to get a job or something. Other people have jobs and are not just there to be at her beck and call whenever she's not thinking of Zhalin and the sword. Which is not very often.

The cases of the week are really not working form me. They are way to simple and Nicky is an incompetent Detective, who should be facing consequences for her reckless actions. 

The story with Zhalin and and the weapons is far more interesting. I wanted to see how she single handedly broke into a mansion in Dubai. 

As for Henry, I'm going to have to be with Evan on this one. The fact that he's is putting up with Nicky's constant talking about the sword, where he's willing to break into places and steal things is kind of sus.  I wonder if he's another guardian family. Or if he's working with Zhalin and she placed him there to watch her, then Nicky should stop looking for her because she is nowhere near Zhalin's league. 

So they are going with the metoo with Athea instead of being about her hacking. I guess we are going with Nicky being so preoccupied with the sword and helping other people she doesn't realize her sister needs help. 

 

[possibilities]

6 hours ago, Stardancer Supreme said:

Nicky does need to slow down on the "flying by the seat of her pants" style of crime solving.  Her naivete is quite stunning for being away for such a little amount of time.  She should be at least aware of security cameras that are everywhere.

Well, Henry didn't seem worried about security cameras either, so I chalk that up to TV convenience. I also think Evan is jealous of Henry; they are clearly milking the triangle with Nicky as the prize the two will pretend they aren't measuring their dicks over-- it's gross, but it's a favorite TV move, so I expect they will drag it out as long and boringly as possible.

 

17 minutes ago, Sakura12 said:

As for Henry, I'm going to have to be with Evan on this one. The fact that he's is putting up with Nicky's constant talking about the sword, where he's willing to break into places and steal things is kind of sus.

Nicky was going to break down the door. Henry picking the lock was relatively mild. I can't tell if he's just a guy who's into Nicky or if he's got some deeper motivation than that. It does seem a bit odd to have a lock picking habit, though; he clearly had done it before.

I want to like this show more than I do. I'm really having trouble with the writing. It just feels very thin. I hate to say it, but I wish someone other than Berlanti was in charge. 

[paigow]

2 minutes ago, possibilities said:

It does seem a bit odd to have a lock picking habit, though; he clearly had done it before.

Dude must keep getting locked out of the Community Center....

[Camera One]

1 hour ago, Sakura12 said:

I guess we are going with Nicky being so preoccupied with the sword and helping other people she doesn't realize her sister needs help. 

She didn't even notice her mom was teary-eyed by the freezer.  She doesn't have the traits to be a good detective.

1 hour ago, possibilities said:

I also think Evan is jealous of Henry; they are clearly milking the triangle with Nicky as the prize the two will pretend they aren't measuring their dicks over-- it's gross, but it's a favorite TV move, so I expect they will drag it out as long and boringly as possible.

Both of them seem to be spending all their free time working on the sword/Zhilan problem.  

7 hours ago, thuganomics85 said:

Zhilan is an effective enough of a main villain and I'm curious to see how all of this stuff with the swords play out, but I also thought she killed off the professor way too quickly.

If she did kill the professor, please don't do a late-Season 1 sob story flashback, followed by a Season 2 redemption arc.

[AnimeMania]

Zhilan doesn't even know what the scabbard looks like, it might be sitting on her end table being used as an ashtray.

Edited April 23, 2021 by AnimeMania

[arc]

"one of my sources" flagged a parking garage surveillance video FROM SINGAPORE -- seriously, Batman couldn't do any better than Evan Hartley. Wow that video had incredible high resolution in that shot of the professor... kinda funny they added a downrez filter on the next shot of Zhilan. He should be in charge of the FBI or Interpol, not just a random ADA in San Francisco.

BTW, if the prof is the only expert on the eight weapons, then as a backup task Nicky and Henry really ought to track his books down and read them.

... why in the world would Faye be wheeled on a stretcher out of the Chinese community center if she collapsed at work? Which the show went on to establish is across the bay in Oakland?

It's cool that the show remembered the East Bay exists, with mentions of Berkeley and Oakland.

Whoa, why did Jin speak Cantonese? This show has been so Mandarin from the start.

I am so not interested in this becoming a mystery box show. And Zhilan is incredibly short-sighted for a villain, to kill the world's leading expert on the eight weapons because he helped her find one of the last seven.

22 hours ago, Camera One said:

and the villain stealing another weapon was completely off-screen, which was weird. 

The prof all but said it would be cost-prohibitive for the show to put that raid on screen.

22 hours ago, Camera One said:

Why not just have her arrested and charged for breaking and entering?  That would help to discredit Nicky's accusations.  Maybe they could have tied the factory to the Triad who was causing problems in Episode 1.  

If Nicky had any brains, she would have taken pictures of the unionization ballots in the shredder box. (which, BTW, don't real organizing drives protect the ballots more than this?)

14 hours ago, TV Anonymous said:

Who setup their manufacturing facility right next to their flagship store? 

I think American Apparel did, before they imploded. That said, if the COO was more evil he would have outsourced everything to a country where he could legally pay a fraction of California's minimum wage.. There are some benefits to having a local factory, but I'm unconvinced King Kwong needed it.

[Stardancer Supreme]

19 minutes ago, arc said:

... why in the world would Faye be wheeled on a stretcher out of the Chinese community center if she collapsed at work? Which the show went on to establish is across the bay in Oakland?

And Zhilan is incredibly short-sighted for a villain, to kill the world's leading expert on the eight weapons because he helped her find one of the last seven.

I'm glad I wasn't the only one who noticed that.  I was confused. It would have made more sense to say Faye collapsed at the clinic looking for Ryan.  Should this show make it to a second season, the editing and writing must be tighter than this,

[Camera One]

1 hour ago, arc said:

... why in the world would Faye be wheeled on a stretcher out of the Chinese community center if she collapsed at work? Which the show went on to establish is across the bay in Oakland?

It was almost like they just wanted to use the community center set again.  The super heavy duffel bag was weird too.  Nicky needed two hands to carry it, and somehow the poisoned worker was able to carry it all the way to Oakland, on public transportation, with one hand?  

1 hour ago, Stardancer Supreme said:

Should this show make it to a second season, the editing and writing must be tighter than this,

Yes, that's my worry too.  The whole setup for the case of the week was clunky.  There were good ideas there, but poorly executed.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

4 hours ago, arc said:

why in the world would Faye be wheeled on a stretcher out of the Chinese community center if she collapsed at work?

I thought the paramedics were bringing Faye from her collapse at work to the Chinese community center to see her doctor (Ryan), which also had me scratching my head. At the time I asked Mr. EB if the paramedics were just a more expensive form of Uber that will take you to whichever medical center you request.

[paigow]

1 hour ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

I thought the paramedics were bringing Faye from her collapse at work to the Chinese community center to see her doctor (Ryan), which also had me scratching my head. At the time I asked Mr. EB if the paramedics were just a more expensive form of Uber that will take you to whichever medical center you request.

It might not have been a request, the clinic was the only place uninsured people could go...until the hospital she ended up at anyway....

[emma675]

I like the overarching story of Nicky trying to catch Zhilan for killing her shifu and the family stuff, but the cases of the week are the weak link for me. Nicky just randomly running around helping strangers doesn't really do it for me. I get that she's staying in her old bedroom at home, probably using her old clothes and eating the family food, but doesn't she need money for other basic things? She doesn't seem to have a job (other than helping out at the restaurant) or anything to do every day besides hang out at the community center and bug Evan and Henry to help her. 

I also secretly think Evan is Bruce Wayne. Fancy apartment, nice suits, contacts at every conceivable government/business/police entity around the world, people contacting him before the police when they catch Nicky breaking into an office? He's Batman.

I love Althea. Her fun clothes, her bubbly personality, her computer skills, the fact that when she was upset she laid in bed with artful lighting and the windows open so the curtains billowed dramatically. She's my favorite. 

[possibilities]

Why was Faye schlepping all those ballots around with her, anyway? 

[AimingforYoko]

On 4/22/2021 at 9:18 AM, Starchild said:

I was so impressed by the depth and richness of the world-building, acting, writing and characterization there that when it came time to watch this episode, I knew it would be my last. I wasn't expecting a lot, but in comparison it is just so inferior I can't justify any more of my time.

That's like saying you'll never buy a hamburger, because it simply doesn't measure up to prime rib. I bet Kate Winslet's salary is more than the entire budget for this show. There are a lot of valid criticisms for this show, but that it suffers in comparison to an HBO prestige drama isn't one of them.

[MissLucas]

This was the first episode that left me somewhat bored. First signs of the arrival of the dreaded love triangle did not help. Quite frankly the way Henry and Evan behaved at the sight of each other required a Sir David Attenborough voice-over. Run Nicky, run!

 

 

[Starchild]

On 4/24/2021 at 7:50 PM, AimingforYoko said:

That's like saying you'll never buy a hamburger, because it simply doesn't measure up to prime rib. I bet Kate Winslet's salary is more than the entire budget for this show. There are a lot of valid criticisms for this show, but that it suffers in comparison to an HBO prestige drama isn't one of them.

If it were objective criticism, you would be correct, and I've made what I think are some valid objective criticisms.

But this one is purely subjective, and only needs to be valid to me. :)

[arc]

On 4/24/2021 at 4:50 PM, AimingforYoko said:

That's like saying you'll never buy a hamburger, because it simply doesn't measure up to prime rib. I bet Kate Winslet's salary is more than the entire budget for this show. There are a lot of valid criticisms for this show, but that it suffers in comparison to an HBO prestige drama isn't one of them.

Yeah, but a hamburger is cheaper than prime rib. Two different TV shows basically cost the same to me: an hour of my time. (Yes, fine, there’s the HBO subscription fee.)

And there’s some correlation for pay and quality but imo a network show should have a decent baseline level of quality in writing and acting. Past that, the pay is about fame, prestige, etc more than it is about acting or writing talent.

tbh, for me the acting isn’t stellar but it’s more than serviceable. The writing is what’s been letting me down.

[Trini]

On 4/22/2021 at 1:04 PM, tennisgurl said:

... and I think that Zhilan made a mistake killing the professor so quickly. He is apparently the worlds foremost authority on these swords and their history and seemed like he was willing to cooperate with her. Killing him now seems like a real waste of a valuable resource.  

There's lots of stuff to nitpick, but this was my main gripe. Seemed ridiculously shortsighted and unnecessary; especially this early. If it was to show that Zhilan is evil and a threat, we already knew that when she killed her own sister, I think we get it.

I'm still finding more stuff to like than not, and I'm willing to stick with the show while it finds its groove.

[DanaK]

On 4/22/2021 at 3:47 AM, ElectricBoogaloo said:

I loved hearing more about the sword and the rest of the horcruxes, but I thought Zhilan was a little too hasty in killing the professor. He was the only expert on all the swords, history, and mythology so why not keep him around at least a few more days and see how much more information you could get out of him before getting rid of him?

Didn’t she say to herself after she killed him that she might have goofed doing so, or something like that?