S03.E17: Two Body Bags

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Shavel catches Quaylon in a lie; Dylan turns to another woman; Kristianna wants to live it up.

Oooooh, Quaylon lies to Shavel.  Has he met with one of the many women who are looking for their own recently released felon with few job prospects and unfortunate facial tattoos?  Is he planning on staying in Houston?  Does anyone really care?

Does Dylan turn to Aunt Diane to save him from Heather?  Has our pretty boy survived the car ride from Hell with his features intact? 

And what of darling Kristianna?  Will look at me, I'm Indian, really, look at my fringed jacket John accompany her on her plan to live it up?  Will his Bonnie and Clyde window sticker come back to bite him?  Will PPAL get her wish of someone making him take off that damn jacket and burning it in front of him while explaining to him that he is an insult to all people of Native American heritage who have actual tribal affiliations? (Sorry, stepping off my soapbox now.  Yep, that's better.)

Original air date 2020.11.06

[sempervivum]

I'm going to guess that when Kristianna finally 'turns herself in', they'll reveal that she isn't even wanted by the law and she'll be allowed to continue her halfway house time.  Also, her sister is rough looking- like, unhealthy.

Destinee has a really ugly, irrational attitude. I get the impression Kelly represents a big threat to her tiny 12-year old mind. Honestly, her hands look like they're either burned or covered with psoriasis (that's the tattoos) and fungus (those god-awful fake nails).

Ugh, Shovel, stop trying to convince your poor kid that she 'loves' Qualude and that he's her 'daddy'. Meanwhile, who's bankrolling Q's every-expanding wardrobe? -new glasses in the talking heads, and those stupid sparkly kicks. Also, the girl his sisters dug up for him looks like a teenager, but they say she has 'the looks, the body and the means'-huh? 

So Dylan actually has 2 involved parents, and an aunt, all of whom apparently would have taken him in. I assumed he was either orphaned or abandoned by his family, why else would you choose the company of an obsessive lunatic?

What a surprise! Jessica, like everybody else on this show, has a trashy looking best friend, I'm expecting to hear that she was also in the slammer and maybe even turned Jess on to Maurice.

Speaking of trashy 'friends', enter Tara Belle (when Lindsey and Scott were mentioning her, I though they were saying either 'Caramel' or 'Clarabelle'). Tara confirms what we all suspected- Lindsey's only in it for the money.

 

 

[RealReality]

Shavel dealing with the repercussion of her actions is totally fine, its sad that she keeps using her daughter as a pawn.  

Oh fuck Heather is losing her fucking mind!  Holy guacamole!  Dylan's tears are fake, he always knew who Heather was.  Why didn't Dylan parole to his mother or aunt's house?????

Edited November 7, 2020 by RealReality

[RealReality]

LOL, all those secret meetings and they never had sex.  Native John, she doesn't want to have sex with you boo.  

[RealReality]

Ha ha, quaylon buying drinks for other women with shavel's money.  LOL.  

[RealReality]

5 hours ago, sempervivum said:

I'm going to guess that when Kristianna finally 'turns herself in', they'll reveal that she isn't even wanted by the law and she'll be allowed to continue her halfway house time.  Also, her sister is rough looking- like, unhealthy.

Destinee has a really ugly, irrational attitude. I get the impression Kelly represents a big threat to her tiny 12-year old mind. Honestly, her hands look like they're either burned or covered with psoriasis (that's the tattoos) and fungus (those god-awful fake nails).

Ugh, Shovel, stop trying to convince your poor kid that she 'loves' Qualude and that he's her 'daddy'. Meanwhile, who's bankrolling Q's every-expanding wardrobe? -new glasses in the talking heads, and those stupid sparkly kicks. Also, the girl his sisters dug up for him looks like a teenager, but they say she has 'the looks, the body and the means'-huh? 

So Dylan actually has 2 involved parents, and an aunt, all of whom apparently would have taken him in. I assumed he was either orphaned or abandoned by his family, why else would you choose the company of an obsessive lunatic?

What a surprise! Jessica, like everybody else on this show, has a trashy looking best friend, I'm expecting to hear that she was also in the slammer and maybe even turned Jess on to Maurice.

Speaking of trashy 'friends', enter Tara Belle (when Lindsey and Scott were mentioning her, I though they were saying either 'Caramel' or 'Clarabelle'). Tara confirms what we all suspected- Lindsey's only in it for the money.

 

 

Her sister looks like she maybe stopped doing meth two days ago.  She is giving me Aileen Wournos vibes.  

Destinee is ecstatic at the thought of marriage because it will give her full and unfettered access to Shawn's money.  No more allowance, no more asking him for money, she will just drain his bank account and be gone.  He is such a fucking nitwit.  

I still don't know why Destinee is so mad at Kelly.  She is saying that Kelly disrespects their relationship, but by what, calling the father of her children?  And of course Kelly is keeping the kids away from Destinee, what the hell is wrong with Shawn.  Two minutes ago he was worried she wasn't even going to make it to the court date!

I think, as much as anyone, that Quaylon needs to go out and experience the world and shouldn't be tied down to an insta-family.  I think Shavel is shitty for using her child as a pawn to guilt Quaylon and never appears to think about her own daughter's feelings.  

BUT, I'm super confused as to why his family thinks he is a catch.  He is a felon, he is not particularly attractive, he isn't particularly personable, I haven't heard him rap yet, but I'm guessing its not impressive, he doesn't have a job and he has facial tattoos.  I cannot understand why anyone in his universe expects him to land a woman of "means" who is mildly attractive.  Listen, if he was bringing Dylan's looks and charm to the table, I'd totally get it, but he is not.  

LOL, Jessica looked awful in that dress.  

The fact that Dylan paroled with Heather instead of his mother or aunt demonstrates, even more clearly, that there is something rotten about Dylan.  He is very, very charming and handsome.  

Dylan may not have known the extent of Heather's insanity while he was in prison, BUT, what he did know about Heather was that a) she got his name tattooed over her body in six different languages and b) she got enraged when Dylan's mother came to visit him.  Those two things alone should be red flags and alert you to some serious crazy.  If you have nowhere else to turn to, you accept the risk of those red flags.  But there is no reason to have your mother and aunt nearby, but instead choose to parole with someone who has already shown you those red flags.  It doesn't make any sense and it makes me think that there is something else going on.  Either Dylan wasn't welcome in his mother or aunt's house, OR he had some nefarious plan to steal aunt Diane's financial information or to run an operation out of her house and charm aunt Diane into covering for him.  

[Keywestclubkid]

Shawn is a fucking idiot.... 

[Keywestclubkid]

Dylan dude just 24 hrs out and she has freaked out on you how many times? Run don’t walk the fuck away 

[Keywestclubkid]

Wait wait wait wait does Scott have a home office in that house? Why would he be building a room for her daughter when they could just use that room?? If having a room for her child was that important and she can’t come stay with her until it’s done why does he have that home office?

[sempervivum]

Can't believe I forgot to comment on Destinee's tale of being a long-time 'chubby chaser', complete with TMI description of the alleged sexual advantages. Although Mr. Sempervivum snorted after her babbling about how being on top gave more 'friction', 'That's nonsense; there'd be more friction with the fat guy on top, right?'

So she's going to try to fatten Shawn up? Literally the only good thing about him is that he looks pretty fit. And it's funny because he thought she was overweight when they first met after prison!

[Persnickety1]

Heather is nuttier than my mother's holiday Jell-O salad.  

Dylan needs to change his parole address to his mom's residence.  Otherwise, his pretty face could next be seen on an episode of Your Worst Nightmare on ID Discovery.  

On the long shots, I thought Kristiana's sister looked like Brittany (of Brittany and Marcellino).  

Then the camera went in tight on her last night and she looks like her skin is crawling off of her face.  That's one very rough-looking family.  

 

Spoiler

I was distracted last night, but in the previews was that Density taking a home pregnancy test?  

 

[mamadrama]

I thought they were converting the garage for Miley, but last night it looked like an attic room...

Shawn's house is definitely an Air B&B. It became much clearer last night.

Why didn't Dylan parole to his family's house? It was apparently his idea to be on the show. Maybe he thought being paroled with Heather would cinch his chances of being cast. 

Jessica in that dress? No, honey. Just no. 

I like Kristiann, but am not otherwise thrilled by the Dances with Meth portion of the show. John tests me. 

I already like Tara Belle more than Flappy.  

[AZChristian]

1 hour ago, mamadrama said:

I like Kristiann, but am not otherwise thrilled by the Dances with Meth portion of the show. John tests me. 

Are you sure you don't mean "triggers"?  It seems like everything triggers Kristiann, so hanging out with John can't be smart.

[sempervivum]

3 hours ago, mamadrama said:

Dances with Meth portion of the show

Brilliant!

[mamadrama]

3 hours ago, AZChristian said:

Are you sure you don't mean "triggers"?  It seems like everything triggers Kristiann, so hanging out with John can't be smart.

That, too, but he certainly tests my patience, my attention, and my give a damn. 

[bichonblitz]

Kristianne is a mess, even her sister is ready to turn her in. Why is he so head over heels with this loser? I thought Johns kids were living with him, must be a mighty crowded house. 

Dylan, run back to mommy and auntie. They seem like decent people. He's a cutie, he can find a better woman than that batshit broad in no time. Maybe he should look up Sara. Ha! 

Jessica's ass in those tight dresses and those tree stumps for legs. Girl, cover yourself. Am I crazy or does her man appear to really want to do right? Will he repay her dad? Get a job? Will he stick around for the baby? So many questions. Only time will tell. 

Newsflash Destiny: your man has SIX kids. He is going to have to communicate with the ex until  they are 18 and those kids are going to be a part of your life, too. Welcome to step mommy hood. Oh, I forgot, she's goin' back to prison soon. Never mind. 

[Andyourlittledog2]

Hey kids, meet your new stepmom!  Gawd, Shawn. I'm sure the kids will just love Destinie.  And Kelly reproduced with this loser six times so it's hard to feel empathy for her but damn, that's a hard pill to swallow, that your children will have to deal with this terrible woman.  I'd be livid if my ex put my kids in this woman's life.

The only thing I can deduce from Dylan's waffling on staying with Heather because she helped him during his imprisonment is that this couple are playing it up for reality TV fame. Because no normal (or even abnormal) person would fail to run away from Heather at this point, especially if he has other good options for parole.

Shavel's mistake was in not choosing someone who would be stuck on parole in KC with her. But apparently Quaylon served his time and is not on paper so he can go and live where he wants at any time and has to get approval from no one.  I hope he stays in Texas but reality TV fame will probably make him return to that awful woman.. And there's another innocent child dragged thru crap on national TV because her parent(s) are famewhores.  There should be a law.

I can feel John and the family's fear through the TV when Kristianna puts off until tomorrow what she should do today.  I'd like to know more about John's prison history.  Unless he is on parole or probation he can't be arrested for being in her presence (felons cannot be with other felons) but maybe he simply meant because she is wanted and he's harboring her?  Still, I want to know more about this guy's history.

Of course Lindsey and Tarabelle are lovers. Of course they are.  That's the thing about taking a prisoner into your life - they have friends and family that perhaps you are not so fond of letting in too but too late!  There they are in your living room eating your food, inserting themselves into your life. Scott just bought himself a Tarabelle when he ordered himself a Lindsey. Good luck with that.

[bichonblitz]

Shavel's daughter is so beautiful and sweet. Do you love Quaylon, do you miss Quaylon? That poor child. Some people just don't deserve to procreate. 

[OoogleEyes]

Why was this episode called 'Two Body Bags'? Did someone or something die?(besides my SOUL)

[Scout Finch]

2 hours ago, OoogleEyes said:

Why was this episode called 'Two Body Bags'? Did someone or something die?(besides my SOUL)

Because Destinie was already spoiling for a fight before she even got to the restaurant and said that there would need to be a body bag if Kelly disrespected her but then changed the amount to two. Not sure if she meant it's because it will be a fight to both their deaths or if the second one is meant for Shawn for also apparently disrespecting her.

Edited November 8, 2020 by Scout Finch
Changed "Destinee" back to "Destinie." It's apparently my Destiny to have to keep looking up her name for the correct spelling.

[mamadrama]

15 hours ago, OoogleEyes said:

Why was this episode called 'Two Body Bags'?

Because there's at least 4 people on the show that I'd like to kill but, realistically, only 2 I could probably get away with. 

[citychic]

Would they be looking for Kristianne? Given they found her at the restaurant with John so they probably know him, his truck and his house so why was she so comfortable leaving there with him in the light of day not even looking around to see if she was being watched?

[Boo Boo]

On 11/7/2020 at 3:10 AM, RealReality said:

Shavel dealing with the repercussion of her actions is totally fine, its sad that she keeps using her daughter as a pawn.  

Oh fuck Heather is losing her fucking mind!  Holy guacamole!  Dylan's tears are fake, he always knew who Heather was.  Why didn't Dylan parole to his mother or aunt's house?????

Dylan didn't have a normal outside of prison relationship so how could he know the full extent of her crazy?  I would also bet with him being in prison, her insane insecurities didn't come out -- she knew where her man was at all times.  So she's on her best behavior and he's in a place where having ANYONE outside being there for him probably feels like you won the lottery.   I'm sure he didn't have any idea how it was going to be when he got out of prison and probably had rose-colored glasses on.  Those tears were real and the sad realization that the life he thought he was going to have with her is no more.  So if he was feeling in love and had no red flags, why would he parole to his mom or aunt's?

Edited November 8, 2020 by Boo Boo

[AZChristian]

42 minutes ago, Boo Boo said:

So if he was feeling in love and had no red flags, why would he parole to his mom or aunt's?

Having now met the mom and aunt (or TLC's script for them), he should definitely have paroled to them.  He mentioned that he didn't get to see his mom much when he was in prison because (shades of her own relatives), Heather felt that his mother was monopolizing his time.

He should have dumped her the first time she complained about that.

[Empress1]

14 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

Having now met the mom and aunt (or TLC's script for them), he should definitely have paroled to them.  He mentioned that he didn't get to see his mom much when he was in prison because (shades of her own relatives), Heather felt that his mother was monopolizing his time.

He should have dumped her the first time she complained about that.

100%. Heather is crazy and abusive - cutting him off from family and friends is textbook abusive behavior. Her own family thinks she’s crazy. Dylan has a support system outside of her and he should use it. I assumed he didn’t have family - I was shocked to see a mom and aunt who clearly love him and want to support him.

Shawn disgusts me, for real. Destinie does too, but at least she’s up front with her assholery. He’s with a woman who threatens to beat up the mother of his children, who she has never even met, for no reason, and he just lets her say that shit. That’s disgusting. And she so clearly doesn’t love him - he’s going to wake up one morning and she’ll be gone and his accounts will be drained, and he’ll deserve it.

I mean, you already know Lindsay was in it for the money. Tara Belle (who is really hard-looking) blew up her spot. And surprise, they’re a couple! 

[Boo Boo]

2 hours ago, AZChristian said:

Having now met the mom and aunt (or TLC's script for them), he should definitely have paroled to them.  He mentioned that he didn't get to see his mom much when he was in prison because (shades of her own relatives), Heather felt that his mother was monopolizing his time.

He should have dumped her the first time she complained about that.

Well, that was a big red flag!

[ava111]

Is Shavel house also B&B? The refrigerator was almost empty except water bottles and the cabinet as well. I noticed it as she was making lunch for her kid. 

[1011101010001]

On 11/7/2020 at 8:30 AM, Keywestclubkid said:

Wait wait wait wait does Scott have a home office in that house? Why would he be building a room for her daughter when they could just use that room?? If having a room for her child was that important and she can’t come stay with her until it’s done why does he have that home office?

I thought Scott said that Lindsay was released early and that’s why the room wasn’t finished.

[1011101010001]

On 11/7/2020 at 10:44 AM, Persnickety1 said:

Heather is nuttier than my mother's holiday Jell-O salad.  

Dylan needs to change his parole address to his mom's residence.  Otherwise, his pretty face could next be seen on an episode of Your Worst Nightmare on ID Discovery.  

On the long shots, I thought Kristiana's sister looked like Brittany (of Brittany and Marcellino).  

Then the camera went in tight on her last night and she looks like her skin is crawling off of her face.  That's one very rough-looking family.  

 

  Reveal spoiler

I was distracted last night, but in the previews was that Density taking a home pregnancy test?  

 

They have that good spring water in DuBuque lol.

The Dylan stuff must have been shot over a year ago.  The coffee shop he met his mom and aunt at closed in February and because no one was wearing jackets it must have been early fall 2019 at the latest.

 

[1011101010001]

On 11/7/2020 at 4:05 PM, Andyourlittledog2 said:

because she is wanted and he's harboring her?

I wonder if he can be an accessory after the fact to the escape as he picked her up and took her out of town.

On 11/7/2020 at 4:05 PM, Andyourlittledog2 said:

Of course Lindsey and Tarabelle are lovers.

Funny how many women on this show freely admit to same sex relationships in prison but none of the men do. 

[1011101010001]

9 hours ago, citychic said:

Would they be looking for Kristianne? Given they found her at the restaurant with John so they probably know him, his truck and his house so why was she so comfortable leaving there with him in the light of day not even looking around to see if she was being watched?

He lives quite a ways from DuBuque.

[RealReality]

14 hours ago, Keywestclubkid said:

Shawn is a fucking idiot.... 

Because this cannot be said enough

11 hours ago, mamadrama said:

I thought they were converting the garage for Miley, but last night it looked like an attic room...

Shawn's house is definitely an Air B&B. It became much clearer last night.

Why didn't Dylan parole to his family's house? It was apparently his idea to be on the show. Maybe he thought being paroled with Heather would cinch his chances of being cast. 

 

This is why I think there is something really rotten about Dylan.  

I get it, Heather held him down or whatever.  But, Dylan doesn't strike me as someone who is self-sacrificing.  He is, like everyone else on this show, self-serving.  And he should be.  Parole is no joke and every felon who wants to stay out of jail should give themselves the advantage of being in the most stable environment to parole in.  Its not like Dylan was seriously contemplating a future with a girl he had known on the outside for like two weeks.

And he knew she was crazy....he didn't know HOW crazy, but she showed clear signs of mental instability while he was in prison.  She tattooed his name over her body in six different languages.  She was jealous of his mother coming to visit him.  Think about that, she was jealous of his mother.  Thats not normal.  And why did she have all the time in the world to visit him?  She knew him for like two weeks before he went to prison!  I've watched MSNBC Lock Up, and even if you live fairly close to the prison, its a whole production to visit someone in jail. The fact that she was willing to constantly go up there and visit him after knowing him for like two weeks is weird and shows that she formed an attachment to him way too quickly.  Does she even have a job?  If so, why not?  Because she loses her damn mind after five minutes??

6 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

Kristianne is a mess, even her sister is ready to turn her in. Why is he so head over heels with this loser? I thought Johns kids were living with him, must be a mighty crowded house. 

Dylan, run back to mommy and auntie. They seem like decent people. He's a cutie, he can find a better woman than that batshit broad in no time. Maybe he should look up Sara. Ha! 

Jessica's ass in those tight dresses and those tree stumps for legs. Girl, cover yourself. Am I crazy or does her man appear to really want to do right? Will he repay her dad? Get a job? Will he stick around for the baby? So many questions. Only time will tell. 

Newsflash Destiny: your man has SIX kids. He is going to have to communicate with the ex until  they are 18 and those kids are going to be a part of your life, too. Welcome to step mommy hood. Oh, I forgot, she's goin' back to prison soon. Never mind. 

 

5 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

Shavel's daughter is so beautiful and sweet. Do you love Quaylon, do you miss Quaylon? That poor child. Some people just don't deserve to procreate. 

And for her to do this to her child ON NATIONAL TV.  

[mamadrama]

@RealReality Heather's Insta is a treasure trove of information...

[Keywestclubkid]

1 hour ago, MrBuhBye said:

I thought Scott said that Lindsay was released early and that’s why the room wasn’t finished.

but when you have a whole 2nd room that you could have used for her bedroom and instead made it a home office it makes no sense ...

[sempervivum]

14 hours ago, RealReality said:

Think about that, she was jealous of his mother.  Thats not normal. 

She was jealous of her 90 year old corpse-looking aunt around him, too.

15 hours ago, RealReality said:

Does she even have a job? 

She's a 'model', don't ya know? Like Lacey🙄

The time line is very confusing- Lindsey and her kid could only see each other through the storm door, but then Tarabelle(sp?) shows up unmasked and she and Lindsey are all over each other.

[TeapotWakeen]

I think Scott was using the dining room as his office --- he went through an arch (no door) to a desk, right next to the front door.

[Scout Finch]

On 11/9/2020 at 7:50 AM, sempervivum said:

On 11/8/2020 at 4:44 PM, RealReality said:

Think about that, she was jealous of his mother.  Thats not normal. 

She was jealous of her 90 year old corpse-looking aunt around him, too.

I can almost see her yelling at some curious eight-year-old who is just people-watching!

[IvySpice]

Quote

I think Scott was using the dining room as his office --- he went through an arch (no door) to a desk, right next to the front door.

But that was a relatively recent (80s or later) tract house in Northern Mississippi. What developers in Northern Mississippi build 1-bedroom houses with separate dining rooms? And why would Scott buy a one-bedroom house even if he were able to find one, taking on the huge project of turning a windowless attic into usable living space? I call shenanigans. Either the producers organized the conflict, or Miley Grace was never supposed to live with them.

[Keywestclubkid]

On 11/10/2020 at 11:26 AM, TeapotWakeen said:

I think Scott was using the dining room as his office --- he went through an arch (no door) to a desk, right next to the front door.

No if you look at the set up of the house and room its a 2nd bedroom its off the other bedroom....

[Mothra]

On 11/8/2020 at 9:41 AM, citychic said:

 

never mind--my mistake.

On 11/8/2020 at 7:30 PM, MrBuhBye said:

I thought Scott said that Lindsay was released early and that’s why the room wasn’t finished.

What happened to that interior decorator who was licking her lips over the "no budget" renovation job?

On 11/8/2020 at 7:37 PM, MrBuhBye said:

I wonder if he can be an accessory after the fact to the escape as he picked her up and took her out of town.

Funny how many women on this show freely admit to same sex relationships in prison but none of the men do. 

It's all about penetration, it really is.

[DNR]

On 11/7/2020 at 6:20 AM, RealReality said:

Dylan may not have known the extent of Heather's insanity while he was in prison, BUT, what he did know about Heather was that a) she got his name tattooed over her body in six different languages and b) she got enraged when Dylan's mother came to visit him.  Those two things alone should be red flags and alert you to some serious crazy.  If you have nowhere else to turn to, you accept the risk of those red flags.  But there is no reason to have your mother and aunt nearby, but instead choose to parole with someone who has already shown you those red flags.  It doesn't make any sense and it makes me think that there is something else going on.  Either Dylan wasn't welcome in his mother or aunt's house, OR he had some nefarious plan to steal aunt Diane's financial information or to run an operation out of her house and charm aunt Diane into covering for him.  

A) One word : s e x         After multiple years in jail, he was prolly thinking with the little head . Dylan might have thought she’s a little nutty, that might be fun for awhile. Except she’s not fun nutty, she’s very BAD nutty. 🚩🚩🚩never ignore🚩🚩🚩

B) Forget the pretty eyes & cuteness, Dylan IS A PERP. I hadn’t considered he may be planning to steal from the Aunt. Maybe Heather is even in on it. Excellent @realbeauty ! This is VERY possible!   Putting up with Heather & having her get him thrown back in the Big House might not be worth sticking around for A or B 

C) maybe Dylan thought he’d get discovered like the HOT FELON and start modeling & being cast in TV & movies, so he & Heather concocted this whole LAL scenario 

Edited June 12, 2021 by DNR
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