S05.E12: Compromising Positions

[Teri313]

15 hours ago, Hotel Snarker said:

Larissa-ee: I cannot even imagine why Larissa is a story line at this point. Her segments are boring. Her voice alone grates on my nerves let alone her topic of conversation: herself. 

Anyway, I think she is going completely overboard with the plastic surgery. I fact, all these celebs are! It should be illegal to destroy your face like that and be charged. 💰 💴 It’s an addiction! Look at Farrah Abraham, all these women look like blow up dolls now.

Also, I always wonder what the end goal is with anyone who gets extensive plastic surgery is. Do you get something not like it and want a change? Do you change something and feel everything else has to match? Is there something deeper that  is making you feel like you are not happy with your appearance? So many questions. Larissa is just crazy. Why not go get your kids with that money? Or go be with them?

Because she doesn't want them.

[mamadrama]

3 hours ago, Teri313 said:

Because she doesn't want them.

Honestly, if she doesn't want them, then they're better off without her. Larissa apparently abandoned her kids years ago. They're being raised by someone else. The whole "bringing them to America" speech she had with Colt was probably just lip service. 

I grew up with a parent who didn't want me. My kids' grandfather doesn't want them. I know this is an unpopular opinion because we expect mothers to be maternal and nurturing, but in my experience sometimes the greatest act of parenting is realizing that your kids truly are better off being raised by someone else. Because the alternative is that they grow up in a household full of anger, avoidance, and emotional neglect and, again in my experience, that's even worse. If given the choice of being raised by a parent who absolutely doesn't want to be there or being raised by a grandparent/aunt/cousin/parent/adoptive parent who does then I'm choosing the latter. My primary caregiver, a person who nurtured me and took care of me, died when I was 7 and I've not had a single day of not missing her since. The person who took over after that was my biological parent, but them having a closer blood tie to me did not mean that they were the better choice.

We don't know what Larissa's relationship is with her kids because they never show it onscreen. There's a chance that they're totally happy and well-adjusted kids and the current situation is okay for all involved. 

[mamadrama]

5 hours ago, Nicmar said:

This is off topic, but i once read a woman who breastfed her 3 kids until they were 5. That s going to be Kalani!

I personally know women who do this. There's a pretty big movement backing up support on this and I learned a long time ago to stay out of that conversation. It can get ugly.

[AZChristian]

1 minute ago, mamadrama said:

I know this is an unpopular opinion because we expect mothers to be maternal and nurturing, but in my experience sometimes the greatest act of parenting is realizing that your kids truly are better off being raised by someone else. Because the alternative is that they grow up in a household full of anger, avoidance, and emotional neglect and, again in my experience, that's even worse. 

Every night as I was falling asleep, I pretended that my aunt was really my mother, and I was only stuck living where I was because my aunt died when I was 3.  It was my way of coping with living with someone who knew I was being molested, but pretended she didn't.  

Larissa doesn't seem to care one bit about her kids.  Loving parents don't borrow money for cosmetic surgery and allow someone else to bear the financial burden of raising their kids.

[mamadrama]

7 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

Every night as I was falling asleep, I pretended that my aunt was really my mother, and I was only stuck living where I was because my aunt died when I was 3.  It was my way of coping with living with someone who knew I was being molested, but pretended she didn't.  

Larissa doesn't seem to care one bit about her kids.  Loving parents don't borrow money for cosmetic surgery and allow someone else to bear the financial burden of raising their kids.

Yeah, "loving parent" is one phrase that I wouldn't use when describing her. I'm not convinced that returning home and taking care of her kids would be to their benefit. 

[Mothra]

I think the excessive plastic surgery is a desperate attempt to keep Larissa on the show, and Erickee is enjoying himself too much to not want to be part of the charade.  Coltee's expiration date has long past, but I enjoy the Debbee and Jessee "drama" and the pretense that Coltee is so desirable that his mother has to beat the hot Brazilian girls off with a baseball bat.  Debbee is having the time of her life, and I find her a lot of fun to watch.  Jessee is just foreign enough not to get it but is a good sport as long as she's being paid.

Really, is there any person here who would have sex with Coltee?  If I were dead broke and needed to have my tooth fixed, *maybe* they could offer me enough.  But there would be stipulations:  no kissing, no fondling, no penetration.

[mamadrama]

9 minutes ago, Mothra said:

I think the excessive plastic surgery is a desperate attempt to keep Larissa on the show, and Erickee is enjoying himself too much to not want to be part of the charade.  Coltee's expiration date has long past, but I enjoy the Debbee and Jessee "drama" and the pretense that Coltee is so desirable that his mother has to beat the hot Brazilian girls off with a baseball bat.  Debbee is having the time of her life, and I find her a lot of fun to watch.  Jessee is just foreign enough not to get it but is a good sport as long as she's being paid.

Really, is there any person here who would have sex with Coltee?  If I were dead broke and needed to have my tooth fixed, *maybe* they could offer me enough.  But there would be stipulations:  no kissing, no fondling, no penetration.

And I'd have to be put under general anesthesia first. 

[Gobi]

1 hour ago, Mothra said:

  But there would be stipulations:  no kissing, no fondling, no penetration.

No being in the same building.

[Cementhead]

1 hour ago, Mothra said:

Really, is there any person here who would have sex with Coltee?  If I were dead broke and needed to have my tooth fixed, *maybe* they could offer me enough.  But there would be stipulations:  no kissing, no fondling, no penetration.

[Teri313]

4 hours ago, AZChristian said:

Larissa doesn't seem to care one bit about her kids.  Loving parents don't borrow money for cosmetic surgery and allow someone else to bear the financial burden of raising their kids.

Even worse, "borrowing" $5,000 from her father - the person who is caring for her daughter - for her green card application. Even though he agreed, he obviously couldn't afford to give it to her, because he had to do it in two installments. That money should be going toward her child, not her selfish aspirations to be a celebrity in America. Don't go to the person who is doing YOUR job and take money that should be going to YOUR kid. And you know she won't be paying it back.

[Johannah]

2 minutes ago, Teri313 said:

Even worse, "borrowing" $5,000 from her father - the person who is caring for her daughter - for her green card application. Even though he agreed, he obviously couldn't afford to give it to her, because he had to do it in two installments. That money should be going toward her child, not her selfish aspirations to be a celebrity in America. Don't go to the person who is doing YOUR job and take money that should be going to YOUR kid. And you know she won't be paying it back.

I thought she borrowed it for cosmetic surgery, which is even worse and more selfish.  At least, for a green card, she could lie and tell us she is trying to better her own life to future benefit her children.

[Johannah]

On 9/3/2020 at 7:45 PM, Teri313 said:

It's actually called "Happily Ever After?", but I've noticed that the question mark tends to get lost when people are referring to it. Even on this board the question mark is missing.

Yeah, I wish they would add it to the title.  Maybe it will lessen the confusion.

[Teri313]

1 hour ago, Johann said:

I thought she borrowed it for cosmetic surgery, which is even worse and more selfish.  At least, for a green card, she could lie and tell us she is trying to better her own life to future benefit her children.

I double checked before I wrote that because I wasn't sure about how much she asked to borrow, and yes, it was for a green card application. She obviously knows how to play her father. I sincerely doubt she will use that money for its intended purpose. It will just be injected into her face or sucked out of her ass. We didn't even see her talk with her daughter in that scene, she just asked her father how she was doing. And then coquettishly asked for money.

[Johannah]

22 minutes ago, Teri313 said:

I double checked before I wrote that because I wasn't sure about how much she asked to borrow, and yes, it was for a green card application. She obviously knows how to play her father. I sincerely doubt she will use that money for its intended purpose. It will just be injected into her face or sucked out of her ass. We didn't even see her talk with her daughter in that scene, she just asked her father how she was doing. And then coquettishly asked for money.

Okay, thanks.  Sorry I messed that up.

[Teri313]

5 minutes ago, Johann said:

Okay, thanks.  Sorry I messed that up.

Oh, I'm sure you're right though about all the procedures she's had done being paid for by other people - whether they think its a loan or not. I doubt Erickee - even with all of their talk about contracts and interest, etc. - will ever see his money again for the boob and nose jobs.

[magemaud]

After @mightysparrow reminded me about the term "Mandingo" with regard to Ari and Bini's relationship, I was stunned tonight to hear Angela saying she expected some "Mandingoes" in the bonus scene about her Bachelorette party. 

[Scarlett45]

On 9/4/2020 at 1:59 PM, mamadrama said:

Honestly, if she doesn't want them, then they're better off without her. Larissa apparently abandoned her kids years ago. They're being raised by someone else. The whole "bringing them to America" speech she had with Colt was probably just lip service. 

I grew up with a parent who didn't want me. My kids' grandfather doesn't want them. I know this is an unpopular opinion because we expect mothers to be maternal and nurturing, but in my experience sometimes the greatest act of parenting is realizing that your kids truly are better off being raised by someone else. Because the alternative is that they grow up in a household full of anger, avoidance, and emotional neglect and, again in my experience, that's even worse. If given the choice of being raised by a parent who absolutely doesn't want to be there or being raised by a grandparent/aunt/cousin/parent/adoptive parent who does then I'm choosing the latter. My primary caregiver, a person who nurtured me and took care of me, died when I was 7 and I've not had a single day of not missing her since. The person who took over after that was my biological parent, but them having a closer blood tie to me did not mean that they were the better choice.

We don't know what Larissa's relationship is with her kids because they never show it onscreen. There's a chance that they're totally happy and well-adjusted kids and the current situation is okay for all involved. 

It was my understanding that of the three children- one was legally adopted by a relative (so not “hers” any more) one was being raised by their dad, and the other by Larissa’s Dad. Likely they know Larrissa is their bio Mom but she’s not raising them and didn’t leave them on the side of the road to be neglected. If Larrissa doesn’t want to be a parent I would suggest not having any more kids but just because a woman has a working reproductive system doesn’t mean she’s cut out to be a primary caregiver. 
 

A woman on the first season of before the 90 days (Hazel was her name) was dragged like a dog because her son lived with and was being cared for the boys father and his relatives....while she was working in the city and living in a small room. It was clear the boy was fine, at two years old he went to his father’s people and she went to work. She had recent photos of him and saw him every couple of months. But she was seen as the devil because her son wasn’t with her. No man is ever held to such a standard. 

On 9/4/2020 at 7:16 PM, Teri313 said:

Even worse, "borrowing" $5,000 from her father - the person who is caring for her daughter - for her green card application. Even though he agreed, he obviously couldn't afford to give it to her, because he had to do it in two installments. That money should be going toward her child, not her selfish aspirations to be a celebrity in America. Don't go to the person who is doing YOUR job and take money that should be going to YOUR kid. And you know she won't be paying it back.

This I do agree with. Larissa had no business asking her Dad for that money. 

[mamadrama]

5 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

It was my understanding that of the three children- one was legally adopted by a relative (so not “hers” any more) one was being raised by their dad, and the other by Larissa’s Dad. Likely they know Larrissa is their bio Mom but she’s not raising them and didn’t leave them on the side of the road to be neglected. If Larrissa doesn’t want to be a parent I would suggest not having any more kids but just because a woman has a working reproductive system doesn’t mean she’s cut out to be a primary caregiver. 
 

A woman on the first season of before the 90 days was dragged like a dog because her son lived with and was being cared for the boys father and his relatives....while she was working in the city and living in a small room. It was clear the boy was fine, at two years old he went to his father’s people and she went to work. But she was seen as the devil because her son wasn’t with her. No man is ever held to such a standard. 

This I do agree with. Larissa had no business asking her Dad for that money. 

That was my understanding as well.

I would go so far as to say that if the children are happy and well cared for then signing over her rights (for at least one, maybe all) may have been the best parenting decision she made. As we've seen in a lot of situations, giving birth may make you the biological mother but it takes a lot more than that to make you a "mom." 

I agree that "borrowing" money that could've been used on the kids is shitty, but I don't think that her leaving the U.S. and returning to Brazil to take care of her kids is in their best interest-especially if they're no longer legally yours or you just flat out don't want them. (IMO the whole conversation with Debbie was for show.)

[Scarlett45]

16 minutes ago, mamadrama said:

I agree that "borrowing" money that could've been used on the kids is shitty, but I don't think that her leaving the U.S. and returning to Brazil to take care of her kids is in their best interest-especially if they're no longer legally yours or you just flat out don't want them. (IMO the whole conversation with Debbie was for show.)

Yes we are in exact agreement. 
 

Larissa is awful, but I don’t blame her for placing her kids in a safe nurturing environment if she didn’t want to parent them. (Especially in a formal adoption and with the child’s other biological parent, her own Dad I may judge her for given his age and possible health issues, but I don’t know enough to speak on that). 

[TwirlyGirly]

I'm rewatching the rerun of this episode and I just noticed something (please forgive me if someone has already mentioned it; I have read through the entire topic over the past week, but if it was brought up, I don't remember).

Jess flew to Las Vegas to see Colt, right?

And she's staying with Colt, Debbie, (and VANESSA!), correct? 

But instead of picking up Jess at the airport, he had her meet him at the cat café, right?

If all the above is true according to what we saw, where was Jess's LUGGAGE?

It looked like she got out of her Uber with just a jacket and purse. She didn't bring a bag into the cat café, and when they arrived at Colt and Debbie's, no suitcase was taken out of Colt's car and brought into the house.

If Jess traveled from Chicago to Las Vegas, even if she was only planning to stay one night, wouldn't she bring more than just her purse? 

[mamadrama]

1 hour ago, TwirlyGirly said:

I'm rewatching the rerun of this episode and I just noticed something (please forgive me if someone has already mentioned it; I have read through the entire topic over the past week, but if it was brought up, I don't remember).

Jess flew to Las Vegas to see Colt, right?

And she's staying with Colt, Debbie, (and VANESSA!), correct? 

But instead of picking up Jess at the airport, he had her meet him at the cat café, right?

If all the above is true according to what we saw, where was Jess's LUGGAGE?

It looked like she got out of her Uber with just a jacket and purse. She didn't bring a bag into the cat café, and when they arrived at Colt and Debbie's, no suitcase was taken out of Colt's car and brought into the house.

If Jess traveled from Chicago to Las Vegas, even if she was only planning to stay one night, wouldn't she bring more than just her purse? 

This has bugged the he'll out of me. Has me thinking that Jess is not really staying with Three's Company.

[Nicmar]

On 9/4/2020 at 2:02 PM, mamadrama said:

I personally know women who do this. There's a pretty big movement backing up support on this and I learned a long time ago to stay out of that conversation. It can get ugly.

I never had kids, and I support women breastfeeding until 1 ,but if they have teeth and asking for the tit than that is  too old.

[John M]

On 9/1/2020 at 3:46 PM, IvySpice said:

Jeez, Kalani and Asuelu, BREAK UP ALREADY. You are obviously miserable together. Therapy is not going to fix it.

With the great prevalence of divorce in the US I don't understand why this show acts like splitting up pre or post marriage is such a big deal. I know several divorced couples that split completely amicably, my husband and myself are still friendly with our partners that we were in serious multi-year relationships, frankly the only thing that ruined my childhood was my parents NOT divorcing until after all the kids had left the house, they were clearly miserable, it wasn't a secret to us. Asuelu has made it very clear he has absolutely no plans on attempting to change, that everything Kalani very reasonably thinks is incompatible to a happy marriages are things that are non-negotiable parts of his core identity. So, dump him, focus on him developing an independent healthy relationship with his children and move the fuck on. If he wants to have summer visitation he will come up with a way to pay child support from Samoa where his behavior is considered acceptable. 

Edited September 10, 2020 by John M

[Hangin Out]

On 8/30/2020 at 10:43 PM, SerenityNow721 said:

What the hell is WRONG with Libby’s family?  What are they hoping to hear about Andrei?  Why would they expect a lifelong friend of Andrei’s to go behind his back and reveal his past to people that he just met?  They are so awful. And they just WILL NOT let it go. A normal person would back off if they saw that they were making someone visibly uncomfortable.  But not this family. No, they continue to interrogate the guy like he has some kind of obligation to tell them anything.  It’s pretty obvious that they are only asking so that they can use whatever information that they gather against Andrei. And worse, they immediately jump to conclusions when they don’t hear what they want to hear.  They know ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about the politics or legal system of this country but they know for a fact that Andrei must have done “something terrible” if he had to leave the country. 

This show has me so pissed right now that I don’t think I’ll be watching anymore. Angela, Asuelo, Paul, Colt - ugh... I don’t need to be this worked up over a stupid reality show.  I get enough of that watching the news. 
 

They are TRASH, pretending to be important.  After their ridiculous display, I’m liking Andrei and his classy family more and more.

[Rt66vintage]

On 8/31/2020 at 9:23 AM, Burning Rubber said:

 

I captured Clot's smiling eyes after he revealed to Jess that he's living with Vanessa, for your weighing and consideration. 

Thank you, @Burning Rubber for the Freudian slip. This POS will forever be known to me as CLOT! 

 

On 8/31/2020 at 12:19 PM, lilysmom said:

This was truly the worst Oregon trip since my children taught me how to play The Oregon Trail on our old Apple IIC computer!

"Nuttin!" We played that pc game for months in the 80's.

On 8/31/2020 at 4:25 PM, magemaud said:

Dr. Smith DID mention they came in "different profiles," so maybe so. Speaking of phalluses, (phalli?) am I the only one who didn't realize Michael and the new Goofballs' bachelor party headwear was glittered penis shapes? I thought they were some kind of "stag" antlers until Angela identified them for me. 

That's so typically childish and klassy of the screaming demon. Angela has been ramping up her outrage this season, and I agree with an above poster who said it looks like Michael has lost his soul. He's shell shocked from her abuse, and it'll be worse if, and when, he's living with her in Georgia, much worse. I see shades of Karine happening to sweet Michael. His advantage, however, is having no children to consider when he makes his escape.