S10.E11: Anniversaries and Secrets

[princelina]

On 3/14/2020 at 9:59 PM, seacliffsal said:

It sooooo cracked me up when Zack was justifying why he was in contact with Lindsey by stating that he wanted to talk with someone who thought logically like he does....  

Don't forget that he also told his sister that he was more "emotionally intelligent" than Mindy!  He IS a Fuck Face!

[lh25]

On 3/12/2020 at 1:21 PM, Empress1 said:

And if that's what the issue is and he's dancing around it on camera and then pulling this "but I'm not saying on camera" shit," that's REALLY low. UGH, he's trash.

No matter what the issue is, he's an a$$ for bringing it up, then refusing to talk about it any further.

[lh25]

On 3/12/2020 at 2:26 PM, Ohwell said:

However, he could have simply said he'd rather discuss it in private instead of acting like a dick and making her dangle.  

Or not brought it up in the first place.

[Ohwell]

1 minute ago, lh25 said:

Or not brought it up in the first place.

Yeah that too.

[becauseIsaidso]

Being a statistic loving, methodology obsessed former Psych Major, I KNEW I had seen information on an actual toilet paper rolling study....no kidding.....

It was done at the University of Colorado, and the result was that OVER (YAY, my pref) is better....but only the germy impact, IIRC, was addressed. Namely, that when TP is in the over  position, less paper is touched by the touch-er, thus leaving less residual bacteria (also IIRC ecoli was mentioned in the study) left by the toucher-er to touch upon the next touch-er (or is that touch-ee?)

 It bothers me more than I can express how I remember this more than 20 years after my already late graduation ( I was 47 when I got my BA).

Anyhow, there it is - my limp justification of why the positioning of the tp roll upon the tp roller is of more (statistical, if you please) significance than seat positioning - although I can see the validity of that concern as well.

[LuvMyShows]

On 3/15/2020 at 12:20 AM, JocelynCavanaugh said:

Michael's bizarre lack of empathy and apparent detachment from other humans are a huge red flag to me. He's mentioned his insecure upbringing more than once, and I wonder if he has an unresolved attachment disorder or something like that. He seems to charge forward with actions he believes will please people or make him look good, regardless of how misguided, and he somehow hasn't learned that easily disproven lies are never the path to better relationships.

Yep.

[Lily247]

On 3/14/2020 at 8:57 PM, LuvMyShows said:

 

Amen!  The fact that he didn't even know she doesn't eat breakfast is such a colossal fail.  Further, he clearly never took the time to find out what foods she would or wouldn't have wanted for the breakfast that he assumed she would like.  And further, at the meal he didn't know that she wouldn't like, with the food that he didn't know if she would like, he seasoned it (eggs, with the 'right' amount of salt and pepper) according to how HE would like it seasoned,  WTAF?  I would have actually liked to have eggs, but the salt and pepper would have completely ruined it to the point that it would be inedible, and would really make me question both his intelligence/common sense and his ability to consider others' needs/wants/preferences,   What was super weird, was in his intro to the breakfast, he said something about pretending she was at a fancy french restaurant.  So I expected him to have crepes, quiche, brioche etc., but nope, he had a basic American breakfast!

That's because you presumably like breakfast!  If you disliked afternoon tea, and had someone fix it for you thinking they had done something special, but you 1) don't like tea 2) don't like the little finger sandwiches that go with afternoon tea 3) usually feel full around that time because you like to eat a big late lunch so you have no interest in someone giving you more food and liquid, then you might be less than pleased by their gesture and how little it actually considered you, the recipient.

the thing is, what I see, Meka is a chronic wet blanket. im not a breakfast eater, but if my husband makes an effort to spend time with me and make a meal for me - any food  really, - I get the butterflies. She acted like it was a chore having to sit with him and try foods that werent her faves. Meka does not seem capable to understand that relationships are not business transactions. She also seems to have a major stick up her a** and not like a fun person to be around. 

[Elizzikra]

Quote

Amen!  The fact that he didn't even know she doesn't eat breakfast is such a colossal fail.  

I don't really see it that way (and there are certainly plenty of valid criticisms of Michael). Sure - Meka said at their wedding that she doesn't like breakfast. It stands out to us - but perhaps the episode was edited that way by people who knew that, later in the marriage, Michael would make a big deal out of making a special breakfast for her? Michael had just gotten married to a total stranger and this was one of a million conversation points that night. I don't fault him for not remembering.

Quote

Meka is a chronic wet blanket. im not a breakfast eater, but if my husband makes an effort to spend time with me and make a meal for me - any food  really, - I get the butterflies.

That she is.

When I first met my husband, I wasn't a breakfast eater either and he totally was. He started each morning making me a latte and a small breakfast - my current favorite is yogurt with granola. It wasn't designed to force me to be someone I wasn't - it was a recognition that it's important to eat something healthful in the morning and since he's an early riser, he has time to prepare something whereas I'm usually dashing out the door without a spare minute. I'm not a regular breakfast eater and feel much better for it. Meka might want to give it a shot - she definitely doesn't have the Holy Grail on living a happy life.

[sometimesjennifer]

I think what I keep coming back to with Michael and Meka is that this man, her legal husband, has lied to her nonstop about many things, big and small, since the day they got married. We have seen the big ones (the sex ultimatum, the job stuff, the yoga teaching) and she has alluded to there being a lot of weird small ones (she cited the mileage on his car but it sounded like there were many others). She has to live in a fairly small apartment with this person she can't really trust. I don't think her stank face at breakfast was about the breakfast, per se. I think it was about how this man has been so disrespectful and downright weirdly deceitful to her for a month now, so she is constantly wary of what he's up to, especially when he is being overly performative and making a big deal about doing something special just for her because he cares for her. He cannot even discuss the nature of his job with her because he said he doesn't feel comfortable enough with her to trust her, even though he is the one who has proven time again that he's untrustworthy. Why should she be impressed and thrilled that he is putting on a show about making her the one meal she has expressed not liking? Believe me, I find her attitude can be very harsh at times, but I try to put myself in her shoes and I think she is being pretty cordial considering the way she has been treated overall.

[Racj82]

31 minutes ago, sometimesjennifer said:

I think what I keep coming back to with Michael and Meka is that this man, her legal husband, has lied to her nonstop about many things, big and small, since the day they got married. We have seen the big ones (the sex ultimatum, the job stuff, the yoga teaching) and she has alluded to there being a lot of weird small ones (she cited the mileage on his car but it sounded like there were many others). She has to live in a fairly small apartment with this person she can't really trust. I don't think her stank face at breakfast was about the breakfast, per se. I think it was about how this man has been so disrespectful and downright weirdly deceitful to her for a month now, so she is constantly wary of what he's up to, especially when he is being overly performative and making a big deal about doing something special just for her because he cares for her. He cannot even discuss the nature of his job with her because he said he doesn't feel comfortable enough with her to trust her, even though he is the one who has proven time again that he's untrustworthy. Why should she be impressed and thrilled that he is putting on a show about making her the one meal she has expressed not liking? Believe me, I find her attitude can be very harsh at times, but I try to put myself in her shoes and I think she is being pretty cordial considering the way she has been treated overall.

Well she can use her words and say this even if it's to the cameras or just leave. A lot of these things we see on here lead people to jump to a lot of conclusions for them. I can only go by what I see and hear.

All Michael ever heard from what we've heard is Meka doesn't like breakfast. In a bubble that means nothing. Do you not like eating a meal in the morning, all breakfast foods, you don't have time. Communication is key. He wouldn't know how to maneuver the situation if she doesn't actually discuss the issue with him. They were strangers weeks ago. He loves breakfast, so he wanted to share it with her. There is no harm in that. He's not a bad person for it. If she had said why or stressed the severity of the evil that is breakfast maybe he would have never cooked it. We will never know.

Michael has been a shit heel most of the season. This is not one of those times.

If someone cooking you a meal in the morning and wanting to spend time with you and also sharing something that they love is your biggest issue that day, excuse me while I don't give a damn. 

Yes, they have much larger issues. But, she has chosen to stay there. If you are going to do that and be sulky about every single thing, than that's on you.

[gonecrackers]

Meka be happy! You've been matched with a habitual liar! What's there not to smile about gf?!  Maybe try a ginger tablet before all those future breakfasts. 🤢 Also, communicate about your likes/dislikes better, because, liars are the epitome of good communicators in both receiving & giving, so he's sure to understand & respect you for it! 🙄

Next time instead of ties, she can get this printed on a t-shirt for him (Zazzle has them), maybe as a parting gift on decision day:

(It'll be the one time he's 'telling' the truth).

Smile Michael!  😁

Edited March 17, 2020 by gonecrackers
left out a 't'

[humbleopinion]

I am with Meka about brekky being foisted upon her....pouting , sullen and barely responsive...

The field producer scheduled a brekky filming so she went along with the segment but her unhappiness would be all Meka...

Clueless Michael erroneously figured if he cooked his favorite breakfast....she would instantaneously change her attitude about the first meal of the day.

The worst part of breakfast was his yammering on and on about the correct amount of salt and pepper..that should have been her cue to fling the salt and pepper shakers through the window....

If Michael read the room correctly,  he would have presented his wife a menu that tickled her sweet tooth...

The Meka Breakfast...

Doughnut with icing and sprinkles

Bowl of Fruity Pebbles

Bacon baked in brown sugar....

Big glass of chocolate milk....

 

Edited March 17, 2020 by humbleopinion

[Racj82]

1 hour ago, gonecrackers said:

Meka be happy! You've been matched with a habitual liar! What's there not to smile about gf?!  Maybe try a ginger tablet before all those future breakfasts. 🤢 Also, communicate about your likes/dislikes better, because, liars are the epitome of good communicators in both receiving & giving, so he's sure to understand & respect you for it! 🙄

Next time instead of ties, she can get this printed on a t-shirt for him (Zazzle has them), maybe as a parting gift on decision day:

(It'll be the one time he's 'telling' the truth).

Smile Michael!  😁

Some of y'all are something else about this topic. All this over some damn breakfast. I can't. I just can't.

If anything, this is why you should have the chance to get to know your spouse before meeting at the aisle. 

There are many big things in life that can make people incompatible. But, there are also little things that you miss when you don't spend a certain amount of time with someone. A few dates with Meka and I would be out the door. She's not JUST a sourpuss about breakfast and you can spin your reasons for why she is this way all you want. She has always come off as set in her ways and real quick to judge. I have my ways to but I can give some wiggle room.

To be clear, a few dates with Michael's lying ass should have you running for the hills too.

Neither one of them are a fit for this type of process. Having supreme trust issues and not being able to bend or go with the flow are to things you should work on before marrying a stranger.

[sasha206]

14 hours ago, Lily247 said:

the thing is, what I see, Meka is a chronic wet blanket. im not a breakfast eater, but if my husband makes an effort to spend time with me and make a meal for me - any food  really, - I get the butterflies. She acted like it was a chore having to sit with him and try foods that werent her faves. Meka does not seem capable to understand that relationships are not business transactions. She also seems to have a major stick up her a** and not like a fun person to be around. 

You don't love breakfast; you do love your husband.  Meka doesn't love breakfast and she doesn't love Michael; nor does she even like him.  She may be an overall wet blanket, but I can't imagine being anything but around a man who lies so often.

Edited March 17, 2020 by sasha206

[gonecrackers]

39 minutes ago, Racj82 said:

Some of y'all are something else about this topic. All this over some damn breakfast. I can't. I just can't.

What I've been trying to communicate (😣) is it's not about the breakfast. This guy is only interested in lying about various aspects of himself & his life from the get go of "I do" or whatever they said. The point is he is not interested in Meka, or in whether she likes breakfast, dinner, lunch, flowers, sand, or whatever- Michael will do what Michael wants to do & then Michael will feel good about himself & if she doesn't like it Michael will play Meka's victim full out, tears & all... 😭

Meka will not be allowed to express herself in any way safely in this relationship. My couch analysis is either Michael has a personality disorder, or he's a raging POS. Meka can't have fun with this guy; she can't let her fucking guard down for one second.

She should've walked out after the first 20 or so lies, which was probably right after the wedding...

Edited March 17, 2020 by gonecrackers

[Ohwell]

Meka should have pulled a Brandon and walked out.  Instead, she chose to torture me with her constant, stank ass face.  I have no sympathy for her whatsoever.  

Mindy should have walked out, too, but at least she mostly looks pleasant while putting up with Zach.  

[Ilovepie]

15 hours ago, Lily247 said:

the thing is, what I see, Meka is a chronic wet blanket. im not a breakfast eater, but if my husband makes an effort to spend time with me and make a meal for me - any food  really, - I get the butterflies. She acted like it was a chore having to sit with him and try foods that werent her faves. Meka does not seem capable to understand that relationships are not business transactions. She also seems to have a major stick up her a** and not like a fun person to be around. 

Yep. I too hate breakfast. Eggs are my most hated food on the planet. Presumably, if I was married to someone, they would have known that at this point already, but even if they still made that breakfast, I would be thankful that someone is trying to do something nice for me. I would skip the eggs, eat the fruit and say thank you! In a normal relationship, whether you like something or not, sometimes you do things because they make your spouse happy. He clearly loves breakfast. If things were different between them, she should be more gracious about the breakfast.

But, because Michael is a pathological liar, that makes it ok for her to be sullen and rude? I don't think so. She is choosing to stay, and so is he. I think he's taking the position of making the best of it, but she is perpetually miserable to be around. From a viewing standpoint, I find her unpleasant to have to watch. I am not taking his side either, but she is equally horrid for me personally.....

 

Edited March 17, 2020 by Ilovepie
More to Say.....

[gonecrackers]

We also see what the show wants us to see, which isn't nearly everything. Meka is fine on Unfiltered; she's no nonsense, explains herself clearly, & does not appear sullen or sulky (even after the raw deal she was dealt). She's explained there how she was harsh with Michael due to all the lying. It's difficult to have fun with a liar, yet she still walked to the boat outing holding hands with the guy, instead of taking that grand opportunity to push him in the water (or better yet, ditch him & the show entirely).

I've said before it would be interesting to know who some of these people really are/were before being tarnished by the show & these situations.

Edited March 17, 2020 by gonecrackers

[becauseIsaidso]

At this point I have no doubt whatever that if Meka and/or Mindy were to tell their husbands that they were done with the disrespect and lies and left, Michael and Zach would adamantly declare it was their wives who never gave it a chance, it was the wives who failed to follow the 'experts' advice by abandoning their poor little misunderstood selves, it was the wives who broke the contractual obligations, while they were simply never given an opportunity to prove what wonderful husbands they are. And 'pastor' Cal would probably jump on that sorry bandwagon with a big ole grin on his face.

I really wish that as soon as the deceptions of the deceiving spouse (both men in this case) became evident, MAFS PTB would bring in real, honest-to-goddess lawyers with diplomas and proof of being admitted to the bar in the required jurisdiction to speak with the other spouse about their rights and obligations under the actual law. Married at First Sight should not mean being set up for 8 weeks of stress, anxiety, disrespect and possible public derision and coercion to allow themselves to be emotionally beaten down for the duration by lying liars who lie and lie and lie.

I wish Jessica and Austin well - I think once they are rid of the inhibition of living on camera they could get their stuff together and make a real decision as to their happiness level with each other. I think there is enough 'there' there for them to be happy.

I wish Katie a comeuppance for her smugness and arrogant attitude. I wish for Derek to get a clue.

I'd make a wish for Brandon and Taylor, but I think they are well past the possibility of any authenticity and will each be much better off returning to whatever fantasy-land it is they came from.

This show has really jumped the shark.

[Racj82]

7 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

What I've been trying to communicate (😣) is it's not about the breakfast. This guy is only interested in lying about various aspects of himself & his life from the get go of "I do" or whatever they said. The point is he is not interested in Meka, or in whether she likes breakfast, dinner, lunch, flowers, sand, or whatever- Michael will do what Michael wants to do & then Michael will feel good about himself & if she doesn't like it Michael will play Meka's victim full out, tears & all... 😭

Meka will not be allowed to express herself in any way safely in this relationship. My couch analysis is either Michael has a personality disorder, or he's a raging POS. Meka can't have fun with this guy; she can't let her fucking guard down for one second.

She should've walked out after the first 20 or so lies, which was probably right after the wedding...

And what I've been saying is that she could bounce. Seeing as she hasn't, that's on her. I can't feel sorry for someone making a choice to stay and then wallowing in it every day. She has no problems complaining about everything under sun whether she is happy or not so elaborating a little further won't hurt. They have both agreed to to stay and try to give it go. So...try. 

My problem is that this is her auto setting. She complained about breakfast before the multitude of lies anyway. Not why she doesn't like it but she thought it was weird that he did. She would still have this bug up her butt without all the lies.

I am by no means defending Michael and he could have worked harder to make the meal geared towards her. I really don't think it matters. And if they are really about to give everyone a chance to bounce and she stays then I don't won't to hear anything about Michael's lying being why she's a sulky wet blanket. If you don't like him that much, bounce. If you stay, try to find common ground. Communicate.

[gonecrackers]

I don't believe any of these folks have an easy out anymore, even when there's some nasty shit going on between them. Ever since Heather, they've cracked down & these people probably haven't much choice. If they did, Brandon would've been long gone by now.

As I've said before, I think when Mindy says she's "honoring her commitment" it's her commitment to the show she's referring to, not to Zach. That may be what Meka has in mind as well at this point, but neither can say it outright & are handling it their own ways.

Edited March 18, 2020 by gonecrackers

[Racj82]

15 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I don't believe any of these folks have an easy out anymore, even when there's some nasty shit going on between them. Ever since Heather, they've cracked down & these people probably haven't much choice. If they did, Brandon would've been long gone by now.

As I've said before, I think when Mindy says she's "honoring her commitment" it's her commitment to the show she's referring to, not to Zach. That may be what Meka has in mind as well at this point, but neither can say it outright & are handling it their own ways.

Ha. Brandon is gone. I know you are talking about a clean break. Like I'm done with production and all that but you can leave. The show will still want to film you and stuff but like if I'm Meka and distrust Michael this much (as she should), I would not be living with the dude anymore. They could take their pithy amount of money and shove it. I would allow myself to still be on the show. But, I wouldn't be living with them anymore.

Edited March 18, 2020 by Racj82

[lh25]

20 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

Yep. I too hate breakfast. Eggs are my most hated food on the planet. Presumably, if I was married to someone, they would have known that at this point already, but even if they still made that breakfast, I would be thankful that someone is trying to do something nice for me. I would skip the eggs, eat the fruit and say thank you! In a normal relationship, whether you like something or not, sometimes you do things because they make your spouse happy.

True, but I also believe it's important to share those things early in a relationship.  Something like "I love that you were thoughtful enough to cook me a breakfast and share what you like, but I'm really not a fan of Eggs/bacon/whatever.  Next time, I'd love fruit/oatmeal/whatever. That avoids the "why didn't you tell me years ago you didn't like this" fights...

[gonecrackers]

1 hour ago, Racj82 said:

The show will still want to climb you and stuff but like if I'm Meka and distrust Michael this much (as she should), I would not be living with the dude anymore.

I can just imagine Michael:  "She didn't want to stick it out. 😥😥  She couldn't be vunnuble. 😥😪 She didn't think I/it was worth it. 😪😪 I gave it my all, but she quit our marriage" 😭😭

And some of the audience:  "She didn't even give him a chance... hated him from the get go... needed any excuse..."  😡😡

She can't win no matter what she does.

[Ohwell]

9 minutes ago, gonecrackers said:

I can just imagine Michael:  "She didn't want to stick it out. 😥😥  She couldn't be vunnuble. 😥😪 She didn't think I/it was worth it. 😪😪 I gave it my all, but she quit our marriage" 😭😭

And some of the audience:  "She didn't even give him a chance... hated him from the get go... needed any excuse..."  😡😡

She can't win no matter what she does.

Actually I don't think that's true.  She would have scored points with me (and probably others) if she had taken her stank face and left Michael eating breakfasts weeks ago.   Instead, she chose to stay and be miserable. 

[gonecrackers]

5 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

Actually I don't think that's true.  She would have scored points with me (and probably others) if she had taken her stank face and left Michael eating breakfasts weeks ago.   Instead, she chose to stay and be miserable. 

What I just said was that a lot of people won't see it that way. You do, I do, some others will, but many will say she just didn't try. That's what I was trying to say.

I guess I can't communicate well either. 😕

[Yeah No]

On 3/12/2020 at 11:19 AM, JocelynCavanaugh said:

Statistically, no. It’s not a value judgment. 

It was your usage that I felt was a little insulting.  Saying that "Normal people" don't fall in love in 8 weeks makes it sound like we're not normal people, aka that there is something wrong with us, which yes, is a value judgment on us.  Now if you had said, "Normally, people don't fall in love in 8 weeks" that would have been much different and not insulting at all.  People that fall in love in less than 8 weeks are not necessarily abnormal people based on falling in love sooner than that.  What they have done might be outside the norm, but there's nothing wrong with them.

[Ilovepie]

2 hours ago, lh25 said:

True, but I also believe it's important to share those things early in a relationship.  Something like "I love that you were thoughtful enough to cook me a breakfast and share what you like, but I'm really not a fan of Eggs/bacon/whatever.  Next time, I'd love fruit/oatmeal/whatever. That avoids the "why didn't you tell me years ago you didn't like this" fights...

I agree, but that is the mature, thoughtful way to handle this situation. Meka did not do this. She sat there with a scowl on her face, sullen, and looking at her phone.

[Yeah No]

On 3/13/2020 at 7:41 AM, becauseIsaidso said:

Why argue/bitch about the toilet seat when the empty toilet paper roller is so much more fun? I never bitched about that either - just left it empty and kept a roll hidden for my own use until the hit was taken. Yup, and it worked. Took him a while to figure out what the heck I was doing with the tp roller still empty. Good times.

OMG, I can't believe this, but I did the exact same thing years ago when I first got married, only he never got the hint.  I don't know what the hell he was wiping his ass with after a while.  I had to make a "thing" out of it for him to get a clue.  Fortunately he grew up after a few years (we were young when we got married - I was 21, he was 23) and this was never a problem anymore.  But thankfully he never, ever left the toilet seat up.  To those that think this is one of those ways women are unfair to men in expecting the seat to be put down, remember that perhaps 1/3 to 1/2 of the time men have to sit down too, so it's not always "inconveniencing" them to have to put the seat up.  Plus, as someone pointed out, what about just keeping the lid down altogether? 

Our solution to this problem for the past 20 years has been separate bathrooms.  We never had kids so there were usually 2 bathrooms to choose from.  During the recession 10 years ago we rented a small apartment for a while and had to share a bathroom, but never had any issues whatsoever (we were in our early 50s at the time).  Somehow these things work themselves out once you grow up and reach a certain age if you are not hopelessly stuck in a state of arrested development.  I personally don't think Austin and Jessica have any real issues to speak of.  If this is the worst of it, don't call me until they have real problems, LOL.

[Yeah No]

On 3/13/2020 at 3:25 PM, sometimesjennifer said:

I am one of those who cannot stand her, but it's not her confidence in and of itself that turns me off. In fact, I think it is awesome and I think everyone should think highly of themselves, no matter what they look like or what shitty people (myself included - I am totally guilty of the turtle comments) say about their looks. However, my issue is that she seems to think that she is so incredible and amazing that Derek is a piece of trash under her shoe. She has repeatedly commented with disgust that he is such a dork and a nerd. She comes across like she thinks that he should be kissing the ground she walks on because he is so lucky to have someone so out of his league. Her response to his desire to discuss goals and dreams really rubbed me the wrong way. She rolled her eyes and acted like he is an idiot and unrealistic to want to travel and write a song, but her ONLY life dream is to have kids. That is fine, but why does she have to shit all over his dreams? She can have self confidence without making her husband feel bad about himself.

I don't like Katie either for most of the same reasons voiced here many times, but I also don't like Derek.  I know that's probably an unpopular opinion but I do understand what Katie is bugged by with him.  It started with the really crass and immature toilet comments.  Puhleeeze, give me a break, that would disgust me no end.  He is not 15 with his guy buddies!  And he is a dork and a nerd, but IMO not in the endearing way Austin is.  Austin comes off as an easy going nice guy with more going on under the surface to make him desirable from a female POV thank Derek.  Derek seems a little boneheaded and not as self-aware as Austin.  I think those comments he made about not being able to fall in love in 8 weeks were a total turn off and would be to most women in Katie's place.  You have to keep positive and not set such certain, strangling limits on what you will and will not do that you make the other person think you're telling them you're not seeing a future with them.  And I can understand why Katie might take it that way.  But he is too boneheaded and immature to see it.  Austin said something similar but he made sure to say it in a way that left the possibility open that it might take less time or more time, just no real time limit.  Plus his body language said he was going in a positive direction.  Derek's body language said he was being a tight ass about it.  I'd be much more comfortable with Austin's way than Derek's.  Derek came off as if he was saying, "I don't want to do what you want me to do" while Austin came off like "In time I just might, but when I'm ready".  The first one is negative while the second is positive.  To me there's a BIG difference between the two.

[Hangin Out]

22 hours ago, Yeah No said:

OMG, I can't believe this, but I did the exact same thing years ago when I first got married, only he never got the hint.  I don't know what the hell he was wiping his ass with after a while.  I had to make a "thing" out of it for him to get a clue.  Fortunately he grew up after a few years (we were young when we got married - I was 21, he was 23) and this was never a problem anymore.  But thankfully he never, ever left the toilet seat up.  To those that think this is one of those ways women are unfair to men in expecting the seat to be put down, remember that perhaps 1/3 to 1/2 of the time men have to sit down too, so it's not always "inconveniencing" them to have to put the seat up.  Plus, as someone pointed out, what about just keeping the lid down altogether? 

Our solution to this problem for the past 20 years has been separate bathrooms.  We never had kids so there were usually 2 bathrooms to choose from.  During the recession 10 years ago we rented a small apartment for a while and had to share a bathroom, but never had any issues whatsoever (we were in our early 50s at the time).  Somehow these things work themselves out once you grow up and reach a certain age if you are not hopelessly stuck in a state of arrested development.  I personally don't think Austin and Jessica have any real issues to speak of.  If this is the worst of it, don't call me until they have real problems, LOL.

We have two bathrooms.  His and mine.  He always uses mine.  Why?  Because mine is three feet closer to the t.v. than his and he still doesn’t know how to press “pause” on the t.v.  He’s very spoiled.