S06.E03: The Newlyweds

[Flowergirl81]

1 hour ago, Shelly1234 said:

Jephte doesn't like Shawniece so their marriage is doomed.  Men are different than women so I don't believe that she will "grow on him".  Taking her makeup off immediately so he could see what she looks like was a weird move.  Even brides who know their husbands don't do that on their wedding nights as you're supposed to have some glamour and mystery. Plus, without makeup and those giant glasses she looks like Oprah and not in a good way, LOL. He doesn't like her and no amount of logical convincing will change that.

I disagree with this.  I took my wedding makeup off on my wedding night.  I can’t sleep with a full face on, knowing it’ll get on the pillows, sheets etc.  I am AA so perhaps it’s a cultural thing?  My husband had no problems with it, and he prefers my natural look.  All this to say that I don’t find it odd that Shawniece removed her makeup.  And she definitely looks nothing like Oprah...

Edited January 20, 2018 by Flowergirl81

[Shelly1234]

14 hours ago, Flowergirl81 said:

I disagree with this.  I took my wedding makeup off on my wedding night.  I can’t sleep with a full face on, knowing it’ll get on the pillows, sheets etc.  I am AA so perhaps it’s a cultural thing?  My husband had no problems with it, and he prefers my natural look.  All this to say that I don’t find it odd that Shawniece removed her makeup.  And she definitely looks nothing like Oprah...

But your husband already KNEW you before you got married!  Shawniece married a stranger and turned him off with her behavior at the wedding. You can tell Jephte sees her as crude and unattractive. Instead of trying to keep some glamour her attitude with washing her makeup off and putting those glasses on was "you are stuck with me now so I don't care what you think".  That's the vibe I get with Shawniece, she really doesn't care about Jephte's feelings. And the Oprah reference was more that removing her makeup and putting on those glasses makes her look older and dumpy. No wonder she had to have a tv show to find a husband.

Edited January 20, 2018 by Shelly1234

[PityFree]

 I got the impression that Jephtie thinks Shawniece is very pretty. He was happy seeing her at the wedding and even said she was adorable back in their hotel room. What I don’t think he likes is her behavior. 

 I put the blame for this mismatch completely on the experts for continuing the fallacy that you should pair complete opposites together because they will supposedly balance each other out.  No— that’s a recipe for disaster.  Dr Pepper is newly married; does anyone think she went out and sought out her exact opposite in every way personality wise? Nope and I really doubt actual relationship experts would suggest that. 

[bichonblitz]

2 hours ago, Shelly1234 said:

"you are stuck with me now so I don't care what you think". 

It's like she was trying to look as bad as she possibly could to see what his reaction would be. Wasn't she also wearing ugly grey sweats? And for god sakes, she could have made an effort to look nice when meeting up with the family the next day. Nope, she didn't bother. She's a weird one.  

[bichonblitz]

On 1/17/2018 at 6:33 PM, 2727 said:

I'm so sick of the "it's hard for me to open up" excuse from these dolts.

Yet, they agree to be filmed for a TV show! Morons.

[Lily247]

24 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

It's like she was trying to look as bad as she possibly could to see what his reaction would be. Wasn't she also wearing ugly grey sweats? And for god sakes, she could have made an effort to look nice when meeting up with the family the next day. Nope, she didn't bother. She's a weird one.  

Thats what got me too. I wrote in an opinion noting how strange it was for her to dress down so much immediately upon arriving in the hotel after the honeymoon and heard a lot of commenters voicing disagreement that he should see her dressed down look right away and that she looked awesome like that. While she was still cute, I think that it was definitely done in a "you are stuck with me, so this is what the package looks like with no work involved."

It wasnt just swiching the hair out for a completely different style but also changing into what  I think was frumpy sweats and a tshirt. Her wedding look was a total 180 degree from the "I'm pulling an all-nighter in the library" that it caught me off guard, she just looked so different, so fast. I have been married for years and still make an effort whenever I can to look nice for my husband, and he appreciates that effort. Just saying for myself. 

[Empress1]

16 hours ago, Flowergirl81 said:

I disagree with this.  I took my wedding makeup off on my wedding night.  I can’t sleep with a full face on, knowing it’ll get on the pillows, sheets etc.  I am AA so perhaps it’s a cultural thing?  My husband had no problems with it, and he prefers my natural look.  All this to say that I don’t find it odd that Shawniece removed her makeup.  And she definitely looks nothing like Oprah...

Sleeping in a full face of makeup is terrible for both your skin and your sheets and sleeping in contact lenses isn't good for your eyes. I've fallen asleep at a guy's place with makeup on and no alternative to contacts and I've always regretted it the next day. It's not weird to me at all that Shawniece took off her makeup and her contacts; she was going to bed. (I remember last season, I called out one of the wake-up scenes for being staged because whichever woman they showed was in full makeup and earrings.) I very, very rarely straighten my hair but in her case I probably would have wrapped my head to maintain the straight style rather than wet my hair so it reverted back to curly, but that's for convenience while sleeping, not because he shouldn't see me with my natural hair. 

The other women wore sweats to bed, if I recall correctly. There was no lingerie to be seen. I would probably err on the side of simple sleepwear (PJ pants, tank top, something like that) in this situation because I don't think I'd want to send the DTF signal right away - and if you're feeling each other and want to have sex, you will no matter what the other person is wearing. Ryan's American flag boxers were about the least sexy thing I've seen in a while, but Jackie didn't mind!

[humbleopinion]

Shawniece wore a pale pink t shirt and cute shorts.

Molly wore a white camisole and shorts.

They made an effort ...but no sexy time for those couples

Jacklyn looked like she dug her wrinkly t shirt and shorts from the bottom of a gym bag sitting in the truck of her car then packed them in her suitcase...but Ryan didn't care he probably had them both off and thrown on the floor, next to the stunt condom.

Edited January 20, 2018 by humbleopinion

[Neurochick]

5 hours ago, Shelly1234 said:

That's the vibe I get with Shawniece, she really doesn't care about Jephte's feelings. And the Oprah reference was more that removing her makeup and putting on those glasses makes her look older and dumpy. No wonder she had to have a tv show to find a husband.

I don't get this comment.  The other women took off their make up and didn't wear Victoria's Secret night clothes to bed either.  Why is it that when a black woman takes her make up off, it's somehow worse than when a white woman does it?

[Gem 10]

2 hours ago, Lily247 said:

Thats what got me too. I wrote in an opinion noting how strange it was for her to dress down so much immediately upon arriving in the hotel after the honeymoon and heard a lot of commenters voicing disagreement that he should see her dressed down look right away and that she looked awesome like that. While she was still cute, I think that it was definitely done in a "you are stuck with me, so this is what the package looks like with no work involved."

It wasnt just swiching the hair out for a completely different style but also changing into what  I think was frumpy sweats and a tshirt. Her wedding look was a total 180 degree from the "I'm pulling an all-nighter in the library" that it caught me off guard, she just looked so different, so fast. I have been married for years and still make an effort whenever I can to look nice for my husband, and he appreciates that effort. Just saying for myself. 

I agree.  Shawniece looked pretty walking down the aisle with the hairstyle and makeup and Jep looked very pleased.  When she came out of the bathroom that night, I did a double take.  She looked like a different person and not in a good way.  And those glasses, OMG.  I think he got scared.   And what's wrong with putting on a pretty nitegown instead of sweats and t-shirts?  Men love that stuff.  I still put makeup on every time I go out, even to the grocery store.  Why not look your best, especially for your husband.

[Shelly1234]

9 minutes ago, Neurochick said:

I don't get this comment.  The other women took off their make up and didn't wear Victoria's Secret night clothes to bed either.  Why is it that when a black woman takes her make up off, it's somehow worse than when a white woman does it?

I honestly had no thought of race with my comment, but it's more that Shawniece looks so different without makeup, plus those giant glasses make her look like someone else.  She looked cute walking down the aisle but in the hotel room looked older and dumpier.Considering how she totally turned off Jephte with her obnoxious behavior at the wedding I thought for sure she'd make effort to look her best at the hotel.  By the way, Molly did not take her makeup off for the camera because if she did with her skin condition we would have certainly noticed.

Edited January 20, 2018 by Shelly1234

[humbleopinion]

Shawniece and Jacklyn looking cute.

[Gem 10]

11 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

Shawniece and Jacklyn looking cute.

Well, there you go.  She looks like a model.  That's how she should look for her husband, especially on the honeymoon.  Nothing wrong with that.  Men are very visual.

[DangerousMinds]

And what do you expect the men to do and wear to impress the women? In my experience, men don't care that much about hair and makeup. It's women themselves who care more.

[topanga]

2 hours ago, humbleopinion said:

Shawniece and Jacklyn looking cute

Yes. They’re both adorable in that picture. 

[Shelly1234]

3 hours ago, humbleopinion said:

Shawniece and Jacklyn looking cute.

And again she looks nothing like she did on that wedding night episode.  It's like she has two faces. Those glasses do her no favors.

[Deni]

It still seems like people are equating Shawniece’s straight hair with her looking prettier though.

[PityFree]

I am impressed at how good Shawniece is at doing different hair and makeup looks. She looks gorgeous in that pic with Jacklyn. I wish she had done that makeup at her wedding — I didn’t think the silver/white/glitter wedding look was flattering (although Jephtie seemed to like it and that’s what counts).

8 hours ago, Deni said:

It still seems like people are equating Shawniece’s straight hair with her looking prettier though.

Shawniece is beautiful with either hairstyle — straight or curly.  

Edited January 21, 2018 by PityFree

[gonecrackers]

I think Shawniece looks great more natural, but she can pull off so many looks it's quite amazing.

If a guy doesn't like a woman au naturel, he doesn't like her at all -or not for the right reasons.

I see they've wasted no time cranking out the MAFS PR SM buddy shots.

[Shelly1234]

2 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I think Shawniece looks great more natural, but she can pull off so many looks it's quite amazing.

If a guy doesn't like a woman au naturel, he doesn't like her at all -or not for the right reasons.

I see they've wasted no time cranking out the MAFS PR SM buddy shots.

I agree about a guy needing to like a woman's natural appearance but come on, they just met.  In a real life situation would a woman show up on a first date with no makeup, hair not done and sweats?  Of course not, and here we're talking about their "wedding night".  I don't understand why any woman would want to slob out like that.

[biakbiak]

Quote

I don't understand why any woman would want to slob out like that.

Most women would love to look like that "slobbed out" and at that point Jephte looked like he was about to decide to sleep on the couch so it wouldn't matter what she looked like, even though she looked cute and fresh.

Under normal situations if someone got upset at how they put their number in the phone I would say run away but this isn't a normal situation and he looked nonplussed at even having to take her number and then he put it in his phone in the most generic way instead of just her first name or even wife which is accurate! It would have been a nice and easy gesture if he had done either of her two suggestions.

I think Shawniece is beautiful in all her different looks and I don't even mind her glasses.

Edited January 21, 2018 by biakbiak

[DangerousMinds]

The men I've been with always find my glasses cute when I put them on at night.

[Neurochick]

What I’m hearing here is that men can look like slobs when they go to bed, but women, if they wan to keep a man, have to look like supermodels with perfect hair and flawless makeup, even at bedtime.  We have a long way to go in this life.

ETA and NEVER let a man see you in glasses.  

Edited January 21, 2018 by Neurochick

[DangerousMinds]

9 minutes ago, Neurochick said:

What I’m hearing here is that men can look like slobs when they go to bed, but women, if they wan to keep a man, have to look like supermodels with perfect hair and flawless makeup, even at bedtime.  We have a long way to go in this life.

ETA and NEVER let a man see you in glasses.  

The thing is, most of us know this is just not true. If a man isn't attracted to you without makeup, hair done, etc., he's not worth your time. Because plenty more will accept you as is, just as you accept him.

[biakbiak]

11 minutes ago, Neurochick said:

NEVER let a man see you in glasses.  

In my case I rarely see a human male or female who can rock those specific frames that are very popular but I still thought they looked good on hsr.

[Shelly1234]

1 hour ago, Neurochick said:

What I’m hearing here is that men can look like slobs when they go to bed, but women, if they wan to keep a man, have to look like supermodels with perfect hair and flawless makeup, even at bedtime.  We have a long way to go in this life.

ETA and NEVER let a man see you in glasses.  

I think we are talking about two different situations.  These couples on the show are essentially on a blind date, albeit one that results in marriage.  These are not regular marriages where the couple have known each other for a long time and are already mutually attracted to each other. For the other two couples you could see the men were very attracted to their new wives but you can't say the same for Jephte and Shawniece. That's why immediately dressing down just seemed like an odd choice if your new husband doesn't even want to kiss you at all.

[gonecrackers]

9 hours ago, Shelly1234 said:

I don't understand why any woman would want to slob out like that.

She looks pretty damn good for 'slob out'. 

I'd rather be slobbed out with clean skin than sleep all dressed up & wake up a broken out mess.  It only takes one night to clog.

If the 'he's' can be clean & comfy, so can the 'she's'.

[biakbiak]

14 minutes ago, Shelly1234 said:

That's why immediately dressing down just seemed like an odd choice if your new husband doesn't even want to kiss you at all.

He wanted nothing to do with her when she waa dressed up, I would think natural instict would be to just be comfortable when you are contractually tied to him for six weeks.

[Evil Queen]

On 1/19/2018 at 3:46 PM, Lily247 said:

My husband LITERALLY ran out of the room with his arms in front of him during the delivery of our first. Even though I told him to stay by my head and not look down between my legs, and he was pretty frightened. The rest of the births I had my sister and BFF in the room with me. 

LOL Mine was there without issues. He wasn't sure how he would be and didn't think he would even want to cut the cord but he did all of that. Considering how our last one was he was awesome. Won't go into story here since its not the place really but its one of those things that each man is different in handling it. 

On 1/19/2018 at 4:36 PM, crgirl412 said:

SHUT UP!!!  Are you sure that's what was said??  That's interesting!!  I wonder if it's her first or second or third... 

They live in separate houses???  That's not normal at all.  Separate bathrooms and even separate bedrooms are ok but houses are not. 

Oh yes they do. Now why though is the best part. She has been living with her assistant and doesn't want to have them all live together. As well as the excuse of how they have had their own separate houses for so long and all there things like they do that they feel they shouldn't have to live together but yet they got married. I am not sure how many times she has been married but its not her first. She left a long time husband/family to go slut it up basically. No matter what I still think she is one of the LAST people that should be giving marriage advice to anyone and more so telling them to stick it out no matter what issues there are or to keep living together when she doesn't live with her own and left one like she had. 

 

On 1/19/2018 at 5:45 PM, topanga said:

The thing is, I don’t think the experts are allowed to truly help the couples. The producers love the drama and that the couple generates. They’ve seen the footage and know what’s going on with Shawniece and Jephte.  The producers are loving it

BINGO!!! I've said it before as well that producers have more of a hand in things then most realize. They are also telling editors it should be done this way or that on the couples as well to tell things the way they want....instead of the truth. Yet no matter what small part the "experts" have in things, they are still shitty in their ways. 

 

On 1/19/2018 at 8:00 PM, Neurochick said:

Did those brides ever take their make up off, or were they like Tami Faye Baker and always sleep with it on?

I don't think Shawniece looks like Oprah at all, because not all black women look alike, and Oprah is about forty years older than Shawniece.

They do. All those wake up scenes are more of a "reenactment" of sorts. So hair is either fixed or not and makeup on or not. It just depends on the person. Its the same with all the seasons. Its rare though the women are without I noticed during those scenes or some seem to go more natural toned down makeup compared to others. 

And agree that Shawniece does not look like Oprah. In fact Shawniece is prettier then Oprah IMO. 

 

22 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

It's like she was trying to look as bad as she possibly could to see what his reaction would be. Wasn't she also wearing ugly grey sweats? And for god sakes, she could have made an effort to look nice when meeting up with the family the next day. Nope, she didn't bother. She's a weird one.  

I don't think she was. BTW, the family the next day was her family since his had to fly back home. IMO there is way to much focus on looks here and it is not the whole picture of a person. In this case it really isn't when her behavior is the turn off. 

 

16 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

And what do you expect the men to do and wear to impress the women? In my experience, men don't care that much about hair and makeup. It's women themselves who care more.

Yes! Why is it just that women are suppose to do all this? Why aren't the men suppose to as well? And that is my experience as well. Men would rather see us in are natural state then all made up looking far from ourselves. I've never once had a man tell me I needed makeup or why don't I wear it. They didn't give a crap about it. The only person I have ever heard it from is girls. I can think of better things to spend my money on and my time. LOL 

 

14 hours ago, Deni said:

It still seems like people are equating Shawniece’s straight hair with her looking prettier though.

Which is silly IMO. She looks good either way I think. 

 

4 hours ago, Neurochick said:

What I’m hearing here is that men can look like slobs when they go to bed, but women, if they wan to keep a man, have to look like supermodels with perfect hair and flawless makeup, even at bedtime.  We have a long way to go in this life.

ETA and NEVER let a man see you in glasses.  

This is what I feel like I am hearing too. SMH Guess I should be glad that is not the way it really is since I have never been that way in my life. 

 

2 hours ago, biakbiak said:

He wanted nothing to do with her when she waa dressed up, I would think natural instict would be to just be comfortable when you are contractually tied to him for six weeks.

Exactly! It seriously has NOTHING to do with her looks or how she is dressed. Its the behavior of Shawneice's that is the issue and turn off. 

[Evil Queen]

https://www.aarp.org/home-family/sex-intimacy/info-2015/long-distance-relationship-married-schwartz.html

BTW, for those wanting to have a little more on pepper and her marriage I came across this. Sorry but still not the person to be giving out relationship advice at all. Especially telling them how they must go live with the spouse when she doesn't do it herself. Hypocrite much...SMH

[ElectricCityy]

I was initially hard on Jephte when I watched this episode, then I thought back to last week and realized any attraction he may of have for his new wife was lost the moment she opened her big mouth. I feel for her, I do but she just came on too strong. As a shy and reserved person myself, I must say in Jephte's defense the moment someone displays some over the top behavior or commentary I'm not comfortable with, I shut down. Jephte and Shauniece are a bad match. Period. 

[Neurochick]

I don't get that Jephte is so shy and reserved.  Would a shy and reserved person go on this or any reality show?  I really doubt it.  

Here's my thing.  I've been thinking about past seasons and I realize that we, the audience never got the full story.  I remember how awful we thought Ashley was in the David/Ashley pairing.  Then when David went on that second chances show, he came off as a total tool, so maybe Ashley saw something that was not shown to us, the audience.

The same thing is happening now.  So many on this board are blaming Shawnice for everything; "she did a lap dance" or "she shouldn't have taken off all her make up" or "she shouldn't have worn glasses in front of her new husband."  Maybe the reality is Jephte is a douchebag.  Just because a man is a teacher doesn't make him a saint.  I have known PLENTY of men, teachers who turned out to be total assholes.

[humbleopinion]

Agreed.

We are being manipulated like puppets on strings with the M@FS producers deciding how to edit the footage to fit the cast member's story line.

Jephte was not shy when he was with the elders at brunch...he was thoughtfully engaging with Shawniece's family.

His sharing that is brother is in prison lead Shawniece's mother to speak frankly about her brother.

That was a powerful interaction to watch.

Too bad they won't live in a multigenerational home so we can see more family time...

We will be fed whatever brings the most basic cable drama...

[ElectricCityy]

47 minutes ago, Neurochick said:

I don't get that Jephte is so shy and reserved.  Would a shy and reserved person go on this or any reality show?  I really doubt it.  

Here's my thing.  I've been thinking about past seasons and I realize that we, the audience never got the full story.  I remember how awful we thought Ashley was in the David/Ashley pairing.  Then when David went on that second chances show, he came off as a total tool, so maybe Ashley saw something that was not shown to us, the audience.

The same thing is happening now.  So many on this board are blaming Shawnice for everything; "she did a lap dance" or "she shouldn't have taken off all her make up" or "she shouldn't have worn glasses in front of her new husband."  Maybe the reality is Jephte is a douchebag.  Just because a man is a teacher doesn't make him a saint.  I have known PLENTY of men, teachers who turned out to be total assholes.

If he believed he would be matched up with a suitable partner, why not? I don't remember Cortney (season 1) bursting with personality but they managed to find her a decent husband. Reserved or not, all I'm saying is the problem here really is the fault of the "experts". Shauneice and Jephte don't fit. And yeah, I don't think her behavior at the wedding was helpful for him to warm up to his new wife. I think another poster said it perfectly, if the gender's were reversed would we really be okay with male!Shauniece rambling about masturbating and giving lap dances to their clearly uncomfortable partner? 

[Neurochick]

1 hour ago, ElectricCityy said:

If he believed he would be matched up with a suitable partner, why not? I don't remember Cortney (season 1) bursting with personality but they managed to find her a decent husband. Reserved or not, all I'm saying is the problem here really is the fault of the "experts". Shauneice and Jephte don't fit. And yeah, I don't think her behavior at the wedding was helpful for him to warm up to his new wife. I think another poster said it perfectly, if the gender's were reversed would we really be okay with male!Shauniece rambling about masturbating and giving lap dances to their clearly uncomfortable partner? 

If Jephte believed this show was serious about matching people up, then he's been living under a rock.  This show is all about drama, not about matching people up.  If anybody gets matched it's secondary to providing the drama that the producers want to give us.

[topanga]

27 minutes ago, Neurochick said:

If Jephte believed this show was serious about matching people up, then he's been living under a rock.  This show is all about drama, not about matching people up.  If anybody gets matched it's secondary to providing the drama that the producers want to give us.

Unfortunately, I think he was living under a rock. He says he’d never seen this show before. Poor thing.

But I’m not ready to write off him and Shawntee just yet. I still have hope. 

[Lily247]

On 1/19/2018 at 9:04 PM, crgirl412 said:

Former elementary school teacher here!  There are certain things that we need to be very, very careful about.  We don't have the "freedom" to do things that others can and not cause huge issues or possibly lose our jobs and/or license.  He knows that and should've thought long and hard about it before doing this show.       

 

Exactly. Teachers are required (from what I have heard  from teacher friends) to maintain their reputations, and I have one friend who does not even post bikini photos from the beach online due to her job. In the old days teachers were not allowed to go out to bars because if someone spotted them it would ruin their wholesome reputation. This was all in regards to female teachers though, I hope the same is in regards to male ones. If my son or daughter's first or second grade teacher was on a reality dating show where there were explicit or implicit sexual situations involving them I'm sure lots of parents would have an issue. I heard about one kindergarten teacher at my son's school who lost her job because she was seen dancing on a table at a club with tons of people seeing her hoo-ha. I remember one incident from a Bravo reality show called Long Island Princesses where one girl who appeared on the show for half an episode lost her teaching job in NYC because she was on camera arguing with a guy, drunk, in a bikini, and just looking ridiculous. 

There have been nurses on this show before, but I believe that this was before the show was as sexed-up as it seems now, if I am not mistaken. I don't remember seeing so many direct hints about it in previous seasons like there is now (condoms on the floor, ballgags, sleazy lapdances, making out behind a pillow in front of camera crew, etc. 

I'm also not really sure I beleive that Shawniece has been celibate for 14 months, if she gave a lap dance to her stranger husband and was willing to get down on night 1 without initiative from his part. I do think that things like that should remain private to give people a little mystery, or at least not sound inappropriate. I dont think most prosprective suitors (husbands) would want to hear anything about their partner's previous sex life. 

Edited January 22, 2018 by Lily247

[ReadMeLattice]

When Shawniece took her makeup, my reluctantly watching husband actually said, "Oh, thank God! She looked terrible with that stuff on! She's actually really pretty without it." I agreed...thought she looked way cuter without all that fakey stuff.

Sorry but if he can go to bed in boxers with no makeup and his natural hair...so can she. And if she needs glasses, she needs glasses. What is she supposed to do, not see? I personally think glasses are adorable on both men and women.

I guess maybe I just don't care enough, I've been married a few years, but when we first dated I 100% was without makeup most of the time that I saw him. It is what it is...take it or leave it. Don't like it, don't spend time with me, don't care that I'm a woman and he isn't. *shrug*

Edited January 22, 2018 by Lm2162

[LotusEsq]

I rarely post here, just read for entertainment, but much of this thread is straight out of the 1950s and is very disheartening - women should wear makeup for their husbands? Waking up before him to put makeup on being recommended, like it’s not some crazy insecure practice? Taking off your makeup to sleep is a “weird move”? I think it would shock of you to know someone women never wear makeup...many of them are happily married too!  My 88 year old grandmother’s name is Shelly so maybe that’s whats going on here.

Edited January 22, 2018 by LotusEsq

[ReadMeLattice]

I'm Team Shawniece. Yes, she seems insecure and can be irritating, but still. Hear me out.

Yes, the whole situation is weird, the lap dance was off base, and Shawniece talks to fill empty silences and doesn't give him a lot of space to catch his breath. But it's not like they are on a third date and she's demanding he propose. He SIGNED UP for a show in which he would marry a complete stranger immediately, and now he's acting like his date is being dramatic and wanting him to commit for no reason and like he's been forced into this. From what we've seen (and yes, I know the editing can be wonky), he doesn't ask her questions about herself, he doesn't say "what would you like to do on your honeymoon," etc. She tries to throw out a harmless positive comment like "first time traveling together!" and he goes "yeah, and it sucked." Eat and drink together and get to know the girl, for god's sake! Give her a hug or something and ask her how she's dealing with this huge change.

He just keeps repeating that he doesn't know her. Of course he doesn't know her! That's the point of the show! She doesn't know you either, that's why you have to do the work to figure out why the experts matched you and if there's something there.

My thought is, if you're going to go to all the trouble to be matched by experts and sign up for a show and do all that that entails, at least give it a full, real try. If you're going to do something this weird/risky/adventurous, go all in. 

Edited January 22, 2018 by Lm2162

[humbleopinion]

If Jephte never saw the show then how did he get enticed to come in for the cattle call, interviews, vetting process?

Jackie was approached by producers through okCupid.

Has anyone read how Jephte's initially got involved?

How about any other cast members?

[Pepper Mostly]

4 hours ago, Lm2162 said:

Yes, the whole situation is weird, the lap dance was off base, and Shawniece talks to fill empty silences and doesn't give him a lot of space to catch his breath. But it's not like they are on a third date and she's demanding he propose. He SIGNED UP for a show in which he would marry a complete stranger immediately, and now he's acting like his date is being dramatic and wanting him to commit for no reason and like he's been forced into this. From what we've seen (and yes, I know the editing can be wonky), he doesn't ask her questions about herself, he doesn't say "what would you like to do on your honeymoon," etc. She tries to throw out a harmless positive comment like "first time traveling together!" and he goes "yeah, and it sucked." Eat and drink together and get to know the girl, for god's sake! Give her a hug or something and ask her how she's dealing with this huge change.

Yes, this, 100%. He's just thrown up his hands and retreated. He's done. He won't even talk to her! His sulking and pouting are ridiculous. Clearly making the best of things or even common courtesy are beyond this delicate flower. His response is to shut up like a disagreeable clam. Hers is to chatter away and keep poking for a response. Its a recipe for disaster.

And I think Shawniece looked adorable in her glasses and natural hair.

[Shelly1234]

I am really surprised how many posters hear think that this tv marriage is exactly like a regular marriage where the couple have known each other for a long time.  Of course I don't know any woman (myself included) who would go to bed with a full face of makeup and be uncomfortable. But we are talking about a blind date wedding night that is broadcast on tv where the couples are together and alone for the very first time.  Normal rules don't apply. Since Jephte is the cold fish and Shawniece is still interested it's more on her to get a spark going otherwise she should just bail now.

[Mlle. Kitty]

On ‎1‎/‎21‎/‎2018 at 7:08 AM, Neurochick said:

What I’m hearing here is that men can look like slobs when they go to bed, but women, if they wan to keep a man, have to look like supermodels with perfect hair and flawless makeup, even at bedtime.  We have a long way to go in this life.

ETA and NEVER let a man see you in glasses.  

I am horrified to learn that I've been doing it wrong for the majority of my 25 years of marriage!  No makeup, terrible bedhead, and glasses. 

[qtpye]

7 hours ago, Lm2162 said:

I'm Team Shawniece. Yes, she seems insecure and can be irritating, but still. Hear me out.

Yes, the whole situation is weird, the lap dance was off base, and Shawniece talks to fill empty silences and doesn't give him a lot of space to catch his breath. But it's not like they are on a third date and she's demanding he propose. He SIGNED UP for a show in which he would marry a complete stranger immediately, and now he's acting like his date is being dramatic and wanting him to commit for no reason and like he's been forced into this. From what we've seen (and yes, I know the editing can be wonky), he doesn't ask her questions about herself, he doesn't say "what would you like to do on your honeymoon," etc. She tries to throw out a harmless positive comment like "first time traveling together!" and he goes "yeah, and it sucked." Eat and drink together and get to know the girl, for god's sake! Give her a hug or something and ask her how she's dealing with this huge change.

He just keeps repeating that he doesn't know her. Of course he doesn't know her! That's the point of the show! She doesn't know you either, that's why you have to do the work to figure out why the experts matched you and if there's something there.

My thought is, if you're going to go to all the trouble to be matched by experts and sign up for a show and do all that that entails, at least give it a full, real try. If you're going to do something this weird/risky/adventurous, go all in. 

 

3 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Yes, this, 100%. He's just thrown up his hands and retreated. He's done. He won't even talk to her! His sulking and pouting are ridiculous. Clearly making the best of things or even common courtesy are beyond this delicate flower. His response is to shut up like a disagreeable clam. Hers is to chatter away and keep poking for a response. Its a recipe for disaster.

And I think Shawniece looked adorable in her glasses and natural hair.

I think she realizes that he is not into her and will probably just try to ride it out for the paycheck.  It must be hella disappointing, but she seems like a positive person and I do not think this will bring her down that much.  She will probably go on that horrible second chances show and then later in meet someone in real life and get engaged.  Hey, Sam meet someone after making a fool of herself on this show and is  now engaged.  Shawnice is a million times more likable then Sam...she'll be okay.

[Evil Queen]

7 hours ago, humbleopinion said:

If Jephte never saw the show then how did he get enticed to come in for the cattle call, interviews, vetting process?

Jackie was approached by producers through okCupid.

Has anyone read how Jephte's initially got involved?

How about any other cast members?

I am thinking that most, if not all of them, came off okCupid or some SM/dating site at this point. Its probably how he got suckered into it. I wouldn't be surprised if they do try to find ones that have never watched the show over ones that have. Its easier to manipulate them. Yet if he knew the name of the show before signing anything, he should have watched it. If he didn't find out the name until after, well he should have still watched it to see what he got himself into. I am thinking those that try to do this show or get picked off of dating sites or whatever agree in hopes of the fame and possibly selling something.

 

18 hours ago, LotusEsq said:

I rarely post here, just read for entertainment, but much of this thread is straight out of the 1950s and is very disheartening - women should wear makeup for their husbands? Waking up before him to put makeup on being recommended, like it’s not some crazy insecure practice? Taking off your makeup to sleep is a “weird move”? I think it would shock of you to know someone women never wear makeup...many of them are happily married too!  My 88 year old grandmother’s name is Shelly so maybe that’s whats going on here.

THANK YOU!!! The way it comes off it feels like it is a miracle I have a husband of almost 17 yrs here since I don't wear makeup and meet him all natural face and not dressed to the nines but casual. SMH To me it makes it sound like way to much work.

 

1 hour ago, Shelly1234 said:

I am really surprised how many posters hear think that this tv marriage is exactly like a regular marriage where the couple have known each other for a long time.  Of course I don't know any woman (myself included) who would go to bed with a full face of makeup and be uncomfortable. But we are talking about a blind date wedding night that is broadcast on tv where the couples are together and alone for the very first time.  Normal rules don't apply. Since Jephte is the cold fish and Shawniece is still interested it's more on her to get a spark going otherwise she should just bail now.

Nothing is normal about this show for sure BUT I doubt he is a cold fish or that most here think/assume this is like a regular marriage. He was pretty warm to the idea of her before meeting, when he saw her walking down the aisle and during the ceremony. It was the part where she started opening her mouth and talking like she was that ended that all. Saying she its on her to get the spark going...yikes! She has already shown us a few things that are not going to get a decent guy's spark going at all. She needs to chill out, apologize for her lack of respect she has shown him and ask to start fresh with more of a toned down behavior and mouth. And yes it is a major lack of respect she has shown him when he said to her he works with kids after she mentioned masturbation right off the bat and she goes on to lap dance then mention masturbation yet again. Who knows how much more of this was edited out to turn him off of her if we just got that. As far as taking the makeup off, having natural hair and not getting all sexed up for bed though.....I think they are all dressed for bed in a comfortable way to be around someone that they just married. Seriously going to bed with makeup on and hair still done up still would be crazy. Men do NOT care about all that stuff and its more the woman that feels they have to put the front on for the guy that is the issue. Men that go to sleep with a woman still in makeup and such probably find it silly if they were to be asked about it. In all the seasons of this show I am not even understanding why its all of a sudden this big thing. They have all been with and without it. They all film FAKE wake up scenes in with a face full of caked on makeup or without. But in no way should a woman EVER have to feel they can't go to bed without it and instead need to play games. The men aren't doing something special here to themselves so why should it be just the women have to? SMH 

 

On 1/21/2018 at 0:58 PM, Neurochick said:

The same thing is happening now.  So many on this board are blaming Shawnice for everything; "she did a lap dance" or "she shouldn't have taken off all her make up" or "she shouldn't have worn glasses in front of her new husband."  Maybe the reality is Jephte is a douchebag.  Just because a man is a teacher doesn't make him a saint.  I have known PLENTY of men, teachers who turned out to be total assholes.

While that can be the case, I am not so sure in this situation it is. I think she doesn't know what a filter is and how to tone it down. When they were at the brunch with her family, even her Grandma was trying to pry about their wedding night. I think its a chance its how her family is. Which that is fine and dandy BUT people like that need to remember that not everyone is that way or is ok with it. Yet I am one that is on board with all women taking their makeup off and hair natural. I find it absolute ridiculous to think wouldn't shouldn't allow a man to see them without it right away. Who would want to go to bed with glitter shadow on their eyes like that? Or hair pulled back tight? I don't care what race a woman is or anything else, it is just not ok at all that one is talked about like that and makes it seem that a woman shouldn't let a man see her without such things right away. SMH Yet back to behavior I actually get the feeling that with this couple we are seeing the opposite of what we normally have seen in the past with the black couples. That they will give her a sort of pity me edit (which we have seen a bit of) and make it look like he is some jerk for being cold. Yet I really think if she had not behaved like that or talked that way it might have been a different outcome...at least in the beginning. When its said that first impressions are everything......well it really can be.  

[gonecrackers]

2 hours ago, Shelly1234 said:

I am really surprised how many posters hear think that this tv marriage is exactly like a regular marriage where the couple have known each other for a long time.  Of course I don't know any woman (myself included) who would go to bed with a full face of makeup and be uncomfortable. But we are talking about a blind date wedding night that is broadcast on tv where the couples are together and alone for the very first time.  Normal rules don't apply. Since Jephte is the cold fish and Shawniece is still interested it's more on her to get a spark going otherwise she should just bail now.

Meh. He's contracted to stay with her for at least 6 weeks (I think they clamped down on the requirements after 'the great Heather escape' happened).

If rubbing her ass on his crotch didn't get a 'spark' going, most likely nothing will.

And if he'd been turned off because of her behavior, going to bed with full makeup & wedding hair wouldn't have done anything but make her look even more desperate.

She probably can't do anything 'right' for him at this point, so it's really up to him to get over it & move on, or make the next 6 weeks an even more awkward hell than his wedding lap dance.

[Shelly1234]

2 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

Meh. He's contracted to stay with her for at least 6 weeks (I think they clamped down on the requirements after 'the great Heather escape' happened).

If rubbing her ass on his crotch didn't get a 'spark' going, most likely nothing will.

And if he'd been turned off because of her behavior, going to bed with full makeup & wedding hair wouldn't have done anything but make her look even more desperate.

She probably can't do anything 'right' for him at this point, so it's really up to him to get over it & move on, or make the next 6 weeks an even more awkward hell than his wedding lap dance.

Yeah at this point for Shawniece why even try. I hate when the matchmakers put two people together who are so incompatible simply because they "both come from large families".

[Adeejay]

On ‎1‎/‎21‎/‎2018 at 9:13 PM, Lily247 said:

Teachers are required (from what I have heard  from teacher friends) to maintain their reputations, and I have one friend who does not even post bikini photos from the beach online due to her job. In the old days teachers were not allowed to go out to bars because if someone spotted them it would ruin their wholesome reputation.

On the first three seasons of "The Bachelor", several teachers lost their jobs.  Especially if they taught at a Christian school/Academy.  Based on Jep's interaction with Shauniece's family, I don't believe he is shy or reserved.  He is just not physically attracted to her.  Had it been a blind date, he would most likely not call or see her again. 

[LotusEsq]

8 hours ago, Shelly1234 said:

I am really surprised how many posters hear here think that this tv marriage is exactly like a regular marriage where the couple have known each other for a long time.  Of course I don't know any woman (myself included) who would go to bed with a full face of makeup and be uncomfortable. But we are talking about a blind date wedding night that is broadcast on tv where the couples are together and alone for the very first time.  Normal rules don't apply. Since Jephte is the cold fish and Shawniece is still interested it's more on her to get a spark going otherwise she should just bail now.

I think we are just as capable of understanding that this is a tv marriage as you are.  What you're not getting is that many of us don't think that women need to hide their faces behind makeup EVER, whether it be on a blind date or on your wedding night.  My boyfriend even commented that is was weird that Molly was still wearing makeup, and wouldn't it get all over the sheets? Normal secure women sleep without makeup, even on a first date.

Edited January 23, 2018 by LotusEsq