S05.E02: Ghosted

[auntjess]

23 minutes ago, Maggienolia said:

Well, supposedly he was in grad school in Indiana. But even getting from Indiana to Greensboro (without Tal and Todd coming to "rescue you", of course) isn't just the most obvious of connections. They really haven't given any details about him or how he came to be in the US or any of that. All very vague and sketchy. You know, the usual. 

But all these dates she's had with him, weren't they in Greensboro?  And isn't that where, in the promo, they stalk him in a shop?
Did she "chip" him?

[Maggienolia]

7 minutes ago, auntjess said:

But all these dates she's had with him, weren't they in Greensboro?  And isn't that where, in the promo, they stalk him in a shop?
Did she "chip" him?

Sweet baby Jesus, don't give her any ideas! 

[AUJulia]

3 hours ago, Maggienolia said:

I do to very close friends. Maybe it's a Southern thing? Now, I can't imagine face-timing a (supposedly) total stranger in the middle of the night (their time) out of the blue and ending the call with "I love you" "love you" "love ya" or any other variation on that theme. Nope. But maybe that's just me and my whacky sense of propriety. I mean, I did once have an acquaintance tell me that the only reason I thought HIPAA laws were actually laws was because I was a private person and just because I wouldn't want an ex to try and get into my medical records didn't make it illegal. Yeah. That's a story for another forum. 

I say "love you" when ending phone calls with my family members. Sadly, I once said it without thinking. To my electrician. 

[alabetser]

Like we are actually suppose to believe Whitney meets up with Nada who lives halfway around the world and during that one time visit they happen to run into Avi who normally lives hundreds of miles away? Holy coincidence Batman. 

[KateHearts]

Whitney's mood changes gave me whiplash.  Manic carrying on when she is contacted by the Other Woman.  ("oh my god!  Heather come here!  Donna get up here! OMG!!!") Super sad baby face when she goes to Mom and Dad's house (without makeup of course- because that makes the family more concerned and sympathetic).  Long silences with really emotional faces.  Crumples into toddler tears when asked what is wrong.  Quickly devolves into blubbering with tears dripping off her face.  A minute later she's laughing at something Dad said.  Back to tears again.  Next morning, disheveled mania after being up all night tracking the Other Women, slurping a smoothie while talking at the same time.

I'm glad Heather "got things off her chest."  I'd be scratching my head as I walked away from THAT "conversation."    Buddy:  " 'sup?"   Heather: "Buddy, I'm not sure what I did to make your feelings about me change."    Buddy:  "Mrrrrp.....  ummm........ " (heavy breathing)...... "Sometimes it's not you."  (silence)....... (unintelligible grunting).... (Buddy shrugs and gasps for air).....  (animal sounding groaning)......  "wanna hug it out?  Not too much."  Yeah, her life is so empty without him.

[AZChristian]

Seeing Twit's mood swings . . . if she's not already on an anti-depressant, she needs to be.  Unfortunately, they tend to make you gain weight.

WAIT A MINUTE!!!  ANOTHER EXCUSE TO GAIN WEIGHT!!!!  Wouldn't be surprised to see her rush off to a doctor for a prescription if she ever puts those two facts together.

[Ketzel]

11 hours ago, auntjess said:

What I've missed, (and maybe I haven't been paying close enough attention), is what brought him from Cairo to Greensboro?
No offense, but it's not exactly a place you'd visit on a world cities cicruit.

He's a doctoral student at Indiana University Bloomington. He's in the Jewish Studies program. Under "Current Students" his blurb:

Quote

Avi Lang (Comparative Literature) is researching the Tsene Urene, the seventeenth-century “Women’s Bible,” a compilation of traditional tanakhic, midrashic, and homiletic material in Yiddish. One of the most popular books ever written in Yiddish, in some Hasidic communities, it is still given as a gift to women on the occasion of their marriage. He is interested in the Tsene Urene’s place in the history of Yiddish literature: how the text represents a bridge between the genres of epic poetry and narrative prose in Yiddish, and analyzing it in the context of European vernacular Bible translation. While not necessarily a translation in the traditional sense, the Tsene Urene nevertheless constitutes a serious effort to transmit sacred knowledge through the Jewish demotic. Professor Dov Ber Kerler is Avi Lang’s dissertation director.

I don't know if it's ironic or calculated that he's specializing in researching the so-called "Women's Bible."

[AZChristian]

3 minutes ago, Ketzel said:

I don't know if it's ironic or calculated that he's specializing in researching the so-called "Women's Bible."

Maybe all the women he's dating at the same time are considered research subjects.

[notyrmomma]

11 minutes ago, Ketzel said:

He's a doctoral student at Indiana University Bloomington. He's in the Jewish Studies program. Under "Current Students" his blurb:

I don't know if it's ironic or calculated that he's specializing in researching the so-called "Women's Bible."

He does it to get chicks.  Come on, I think we all know or know of guys exactly like Avi...you know, man whores.  

[AUJulia]

Maybe he's trying to expand his dissertation to include Judaism and women's obesity. 

[Ketzel]

15 minutes ago, notyrmomma said:

He does it to get chicks.  Come on, I think we all know or know of guys exactly like Avi...you know, man whores.  

Surely there are easier way to meet women than by studying 17th Century Yiddish literature! :-)

[Bubbles1967]

So I watched it this morning with my huge cup of coffee. 

I had to see for myself that she was sitting on the couch in her underwear.

and there she was in her glory, shameless as always.

She opened herself to any criticism and she knew it.   She’s baiting everyone.

Did anyone say anything to her obout it on Facebook? Bet the nitwits told her how brave and beautiful she was and how Avi didn’t deserve her. ???

[notyrmomma]

Just now, Ketzel said:

Surely there are easier way to meet women than by studying 17th Century Yiddish literature! :-)

probably, but he can "wow" women by how smart he is.  I saw his picture, he's only marginally good looking.

[Maggienolia]

9 hours ago, AUJulia said:

I say "love you" when ending phone calls with my family members. Sadly, I once said it without thinking. To my electrician. 

I don't know... depending on the reason/content of the call. :) I mean, if my electrician just told me a job was gonna cost $20 instead of the estimated $2000... pretty sure a "love you" might slip out. :) 

[AUJulia]

1 hour ago, Maggienolia said:

I don't know... depending on the reason/content of the call. :) I mean, if my electrician just told me a job was gonna cost $20 instead of the estimated $2000... pretty sure a "love you" might slip out. :) 

That would merit "I will bear your children." ??

[Dot]

3 hours ago, Ketzel said:

He's a doctoral student at Indiana University Bloomington. He's in the Jewish Studies program. Under "Current Students" his blurb:

I don't know if it's ironic or calculated that he's specializing in researching the so-called "Women's Bible."

A toast  ? to the best researcher on this forum. I just love the stuff you come up with, @Ketzel!

[Tosia]

Thank youy guys for the laughs this a.m. on  saying "LOVE You, "  to the electrician.   I would definitely say it , if it saved me  mucho $ . 

Twit does look bigger, I agree, because you know,   gravity.  Muscles that are not used (and her poor, overworked bones) can only hold up so much weight.  Her advancing age also will only cause the weight to hang lower and lower, etc...

She's wearing a fucking tee-shirt as a dress,  and couldn't slip it on at the now-defamed bridal salon????  LA-ZEE. 

[Dot]

Ratings info for this episode:

MBFFL dipped 0.04 points to a 0.31 share which dropped its rank from #13 to #26 in the top 50 cable shows on Tuesday. Still, the show is bringing in over a million viewers (1.135) & do you feel as complicit as I do, being one of those million+?

BTW, Twit said something interesting about ratings on one of her live videos. In response to one of her viewers who said she had DVR'd the episode, Twit said someting on the order of "Well, be sure to watch it by Friday, or it won't count in the ratings."

How Big Brother is that? How could Neilson & its ilk know someone DVR'd a program? Or when s/he watched it?

[AUJulia]

I guess hatewatching is watching. Lol

[Ketzel]

2 hours ago, Dot said:

A toast  ? to the best researcher on this forum. I just love the stuff you come up with, @Ketzel!

Aw shucks, thanks. Maybe my misspent time commenting on reality shows isn't wasted after all!!

[Guest]

On ‎1‎/‎12‎/‎2018 at 7:21 AM, Thrifty said:

Sorry, I'm not up on this show and the names.  Isn't Glenn her father?  Is Whitney sexting her own father?  If so, at least tell me it's not her biological father.

Let's be fair though.  If something is attached to your ceiling, it can be kind of a pain in the ass to take it down, especially if you're as out of shape as she is.

No Thrifty.  Babs and Glen are Whitney's parents.  There was an episode where Whitney was "schooling" her mother how to sext Glen (Babs' husband).  Whatever sexing goes on between Babs and Glenn is their business but it just seemed all kinds of wrong with Whitney "overly enthused" about her mom sexting her dad.

On ‎1‎/‎12‎/‎2018 at 0:33 PM, AUJulia said:

The boning couldn't be that big or lumpy. 

Can you just imagine delicate virginal bride Whitney in Pniana's Stripper Fairy gown?   The fat hanging over the industrial strength boning would be out of control.  From the back it would look like a coupla hams attached to the delicate lace.

[Maggienolia]

Okay y'all... rewatching this episode (I know! I know! I'm a masochist.) In the wedding dress shop - yeah, cuz you KNOW they love nothing better than having people come in to try on dresses who openly admit they aren't there to buy and aren't anywhere NEAR getting married. Not like they're an actual business with actual bills to pay and shit. Second, Twit's comment before she steps into the first dress about how hot it's going to be. It's a strapless dress. Now I'm sure they probably don't "breathe" but it's not like she's trying on boiled wool dresses with long sleeves and high necks. Let me say, I'm not thin and I do tend to run hot but seriously? What am I missing? Putting on a strapless wedding gown for all of 5-10 minutes and she's sweating and too uncomfortable to stand it? But, then again, this is girl who has to strip down to her tired, worn-out sports bra because it's just too much to wear a f*ing shirt. 

[auntjess]

13 hours ago, Bubbles1967 said:

So I watched it this morning with my huge cup of coffee. 

I had to see for myself that she was sitting on the couch in her underwear.

and there she was in her glory, shameless as always.

It's how it was in college, many years ago, when women had to live in dorms, and if a repairman came in, someone went ahead shouting "man in the hall," so you could hide.

[Bunnygirl]

On 1/11/2018 at 2:33 PM, thebigboot said:

Here are the facts of life. She has gotten bigger, she has consistently gotten bigger since first season. Photos don’t lie, yeah a few of them could be well just the angle but we also have videos of her, and proof her mobility is not like it was season one.

If I were the bridal salon I would have just burned the dress after.

I’m surprised that they didn’t burn the sofa too while they were at it.  Speaking of fires, I’m surprised she didn’t start one herself from the friction of her thighs rubbing together in that God Awful mini dress.

[Bunnygirl]

And another thing:   Just to prove there’s even more fakery than we already know there is. Remember when Tal acts so surprised and indignant at Todd because he seems reticent to give Whitney her class back?  You don’t think those guys didn’t discuss that very scenario when they made that supposed road trip to pick her up?  Please!  I’ll bet that’s one of the first things Todd said when he got in the car!

oh, and here’s a really disgusting and very disturbing thought: what if she really HASN’T taken that poster off of her ceiling yet?  I’m assuming she hasn’t found another new sexual partner yet, and we all know how “senshus” she is with urges and all...  so the only alternative is.... “Do It With The Lights On”.        Ewwwwww.

[Nancypants]

14 hours ago, AUJulia said:

I guess hatewatching is watching. Lol

I think we should all do a Social Experiment where everyone becomes indifferent to this Attention Who're/ waste of space. That way When this Waste of A ALotta space realizes she is getting NO ATTENTION good or bad. , it will cease to validate her behaviors. Because you all know that's why she keeps up her Nonsesnse. 

Attention. Is her favorite Drug..

[CousinOliver]

I honestly know a woman (large, ~300 lbs) who routinely wears a sports bra as a top. To work.  She has a large, solid stomach (looks perpetually pregnant), so she wears the waistline of her skirt right under her breasts, but the "shirt" is usually a sports bra or a bralet (like one of those genie bras that were popular a few years back.)  

[AUJulia]

12 hours ago, PsychoKlown said:

No Thrifty.  Babs and Glen are Whitney's parents.  There was an episode where Whitney was "schooling" her mother how to sext Glen (Babs' husband).  Whatever sexing goes on between Babs and Glenn is their business but it just seemed all kinds of wrong with Whitney "overly enthused" about her mom sexting her dad.

Can you just imagine delicate virginal bride Whitney in Pniana's Stripper Fairy gown?   The fat hanging over the industrial strength boning would be out of control.  From the back it would look like a coupla hams attached to the delicate lace.

??❤️???

2 hours ago, CousinOliver said:

I honestly know a woman (large, ~300 lbs) who routinely wears a sports bra as a top. To work.  She has a large, solid stomach (looks perpetually pregnant), so she wears the waistline of her skirt right under her breasts, but the "shirt" is usually a sports bra or a bralet (like one of those genie bras that were popular a few years back.)  

She sounds very put-together. ???

[TurtlePower]

6 hours ago, Nancypants said:

I think we should all do a Social Experiment where everyone becomes indifferent to this Attention Who're/ waste of space. That way When this Waste of A ALotta space realizes she is getting NO ATTENTION good or bad. , it will cease to validate her behaviors. Because you all know that's why she keeps up her Nonsesnse. 

Attention. Is her favorite Drug..

Makes me wonder how she's gonna handle it once the show is done. She's got the same loyal friends she's had since high school, she doesn't appear to have made any new ones (that don't benefit her anyways). Todd seems to have finally had it with her (taste of her own medicine and she doesn't like it), how much more do her friends have to take before they're like, "Ok, I'm done." It's gotta be like catering to the Queen. 

It's possible for narcissists to reform but she's going to have to go through a LOT of introspection. I think she may need a new "therapist"--the one she has now was probably hand-selected to tell her what she wants to hear. 

[Irate Panda]

3 hours ago, CousinOliver said:

I honestly know a woman (large, ~300 lbs) who routinely wears a sports bra as a top. To work.  She has a large, solid stomach (looks perpetually pregnant), so she wears the waistline of her skirt right under her breasts, but the "shirt" is usually a sports bra or a bralet (like one of those genie bras that were popular a few years back.)  

I MUST KNOW, WHERE DO YOU WORK?  I don’t mean the actual place, but what type of business, and hasn’t your HR department been summons yet?

[AZChristian]

1 minute ago, Irate Panda said:

I MUST KNOW, WHERE DO YOU WORK?  I don’t mean the actual place, but what type of business, and hasn’t your HR department been summons yet?

That was my first thought, too.  Only way she gets away with this if she owns the business and has about 3 employees.  LOL.

[Alapaki]

I've formulated a sort of Occam's Razor for this show, call it Whitney's Razor.

Whitney's Razor says that the explanation that "Whitney is lying in order to have a storyline to keep this show going" is the correct explanation most of the time.

Ergo, in re: Avi: At the end of last season Whitney realized she had absolutely nothing in her life that would justify another season.  She sure as hell wasn't ever going on tour with that Fitness Marshall.  Around that time the issue of "cat fishing", or online-dating scams in general were in the news.  

So . . . . Whitney decided to take one of her online fuck-buddy situations and falsely claim that she was being cheated-on.  Or, even worse, she solicited an online fuck-buddy specifically to lie about that person cheating on them.

After all, Whitney has bragged about enjoying the so-called hook-up culture.  Just this episode she said she was sweating "like a whore in Church because I am a whore in Church". Stay classy Whit.

This would explain the time gap between season, as it would've taken time to line up enough hook-up times to get photos of them out-and-about, etc.

As far as Nada, I'm not so sure she isn't famewhoring this thing herself.

[Dot]

28 minutes ago, Alapaki said:

I've formulated a sort of Occam's Razor for this show, call it Whitney's Razor.

Whitney's Razor says that the explanation that "Whitney is lying in order to have a storyline to keep this show going" is the correct explanation most of the time.

Ergo, in re: Avi: At the end of last season Whitney realized she had absolutely nothing in her life that would justify another season. . . .  

Very clever, @alapaki. I like the concept of "Whitney's Razor" a lot.

Here's what has confounded me. It seemed so apparent that MBFFL was over after S-4. Twit was almost immobile, the story arcs were so preposterous, the "characters" were so predictable & tedious. So how in the world did she pull off getting a S-5 on TLC?

We know Pilgrim Media Group produces this crapfest. We knew from her FB posts that Jason Isenberger, producer, and Connie Simpson, prod asst (I think), were in town last year: remember Twit "cuddling" with Jason while "making a little TV" & all 3 trying to see the solar eclipse? 

Now here's my Q for one of you who knows something about TV production: would PMG film a couple of weeks' worth of a new season, edit it into an ep or 2 & present it to TLC hoping to make a sale? In other words, did PMG already have a contract with TLC or were they hoping -- with the Avi story arc, I guess -- to get a new contract by showing how fab another season would be?

The latter would explain why an announcement of a new season was so long in coming.

[AUJulia]

21 minutes ago, Dot said:

Very clever, @alapaki. I like the concept of "Whitney's Razor" a lot.

Here's what has confounded me. It seemed so apparent that MBFFL was over after S-4. Twit was almost immobile, the story arcs were so preposterous, the "characters" were so predictable & tedious. So how in the world did she pull off getting a S-5 on TLC?

We know Pilgrim Media Group produces this crapfest. We knew from her FB posts that Jason Isenberger, producer, and Connie Simpson, prod asst (I think), were in town last year: remember Twit "cuddling" with Jason while "making a little TV" & all 3 trying to see the solar eclipse? 

Now here's my Q for one of you who knows something about TV production: would PMG film a couple of weeks' worth of a new season, edit it into an ep or 2 & present it to TLC hoping to make a sale? In other words, did PMG already have a contract with TLC or were they hoping -- with the Avi story arc, I guess -- to get a new contract by showing how fab another season would be?

The latter would explain why an announcement of a new season was so long in coming.

Great question, Dot. I agree re the Whitney's Razor analysis, too--brilliant. (Does someone else have to shave her with it? ?) The radio angle was dead. The competition angle was dead (the producers had to know that she'd find excuses to bail every time). The Babs illness angle was limited. Buddy wasn't cooperating with the breakup busybodying angle (and let's face it, Buddy and Heather getting married would suck attention away from Whitney.) The Will angle was dead (did I miss him firing her again? Either way you know she was done trying to get healthy). She got what she wanted from the Fitness Marshall (the ego stroke of impressing him or at least getting him to pretend for the cameras that she did) and no way would there be a season if she went on tour (maybe that's why she didn't?). What's left? She gets catfished and takes revenge. Then she outs Buddy's shitshow (so many teasers!). She travels (so many opportunities to highlight body-shaming on a beach, ya know). Possibly she obliterates Todd for stealing her fake class? This HAS to be her last season so I hope she's saving her money. 

Edited January 14, 2018 by AUJulia
Typos!

[Guest]

6 hours ago, CousinOliver said:

I honestly know a woman (large, ~300 lbs) who routinely wears a sports bra as a top. To work.  She has a large, solid stomach (looks perpetually pregnant), so she wears the waistline of her skirt right under her breasts, but the "shirt" is usually a sports bra or a bralet (like one of those genie bras that were popular a few years back.)  

Crikey. 

I bet that's one genie who wishes he could stay in the bottle.

On ‎1‎/‎12‎/‎2018 at 5:40 PM, Donut Bear said:

Oh lord  -- is this the ceiling photo? Do these people have no shame?

 

This looks more like a senior citizen waiting for the LIFEALERT van to arrive after a too-long day at the beach rather than a gorgeous hunk of man worthy of nighttime dreams.   Still shaking my head on this one.

[AUJulia]

39 minutes ago, PsychoKlown said:

Crikey. 

I bet that's one genie who wishes he could stay in the bottle.

This looks more like a senior citizen waiting for the LIFEALERT van to arrive after a too-long day at the beach rather than a gorgeous hunk of man worthy of nighttime dreams.   Still shaking my head on this one.

Hahahaha so true

[ClareWalks]

"Let me clutch this tree so I don't collapse."

[Maggienolia]

8 hours ago, CousinOliver said:

I honestly know a woman (large, ~300 lbs) who routinely wears a sports bra as a top. To work.  She has a large, solid stomach (looks perpetually pregnant), so she wears the waistline of her skirt right under her breasts, but the "shirt" is usually a sports bra or a bralet (like one of those genie bras that were popular a few years back.)  

Wow. I have to ask: where does she work? Or at least, in what industry? 

[Maggienolia]

1 hour ago, ClareWalks said:

"Let me clutch this tree so I don't collapse."

I don't know... if it were a thing of him trying to look "cute/sexy" for BABS and the two of them having fun, I could get with that. That would be cute - that they're still into each other and have fun and whatever. But Twit taking it and making it about her (as usual) is what crosses the line into the WTF territory. 

[Dot]

7 minutes ago, Maggienolia said:

I don't know... if it were a thing of him trying to look "cute/sexy" for BABS and the two of them having fun, I could get with that. That would be cute - that they're still into each other and have fun and whatever. But Twit taking it and making it about her (as usual) is what crosses the line into the WTF territory. 

ITA. And part of the kinda sick thing about the poster was that Twit was emphatic that Babs would not be getting one of the 5 copies.

And WTF is she planning to do with 5 copies?

[AZChristian]

13 minutes ago, Dot said:

And WTF is she planning to do with 5 copies?

Five times the extortion money if she agrees to destroy the originals.  But now they're on the internet, so there's no turning back.

[Tabbygirl521]

On 1/12/2018 at 9:33 AM, AUJulia said:

The boning couldn't be that big or lumpy. 

That’s What She Said

[AUJulia]

Booooom

[CousinOliver]

22 hours ago, Irate Panda said:

I MUST KNOW, WHERE DO YOU WORK?  I don’t mean the actual place, but what type of business, and hasn’t your HR department been summons yet?

She works at a major universiy.  

But, truly, because of her body shape, there's no mid-section skin showing, so it's not obvious...until you know, then it's obvious.  

[Nancypants]

Ari exists just as real as last year's fetus!

*hork

Also..

Switch the R and the I in Ari...and you get..AIR!

[ClareWalks]

5 minutes ago, Nancypants said:

Ari exists just as real as last year's fetus!

*hork

Also..

Switch the R and the I in Ari...and you get..AIR!

It's Avi, LOL

[Nancypants]

9 minutes ago, ClareWalks said:

It's Avi, LOL

Allegedly!

(He made them change the V to an R, same day he made them garble his voice and blur his image.That's what I tell myself so that my joke works..)

Edited January 15, 2018 by Nancypants
She thinks she can dance

[Irate Panda]

1 hour ago, Nancypants said:

Allegedly!

(He made them change the V to an R, same day he made them garble his voice and blur his image.That's what I tell myself so that my joke works..)

Well, Lennie, Tal and Buddy all don’t use their first names so it’s not really that far of a leap that Avi is Ari lol

[ClareWalks]

2 hours ago, Nancypants said:

Allegedly!

(He made them change the V to an R, same day he made them garble his voice and blur his image.That's what I tell myself so that my joke works..)

Hell, if I'd been linked romantically with Whitney I'd change my name, birthday, and biological sex to start a whole new life :-P

[Maggienolia]

5 hours ago, ClareWalks said:

It's Avi, LOL

Sadly, he didn't have the sense to use a fake name. You'd think he would (or a nickname or variation on his real name) if he's such the player/catfisher Twit is making him out to be. Of course, Twit is not known for being all that in touch with reality and the timeline of everything that happens on this show and in her life is more contorted than the cast of every Cirque de Soleil show combined. At any rate, he's on the Indiana University site as Avi Lang in both the Comparative Lit department (where he's a PhD student/candidate) and in the Jewish Studies department (where he's doing his minor area for the PhD). Poor, poor foolish boy. Should've gone with Ari when he had the chance. *shakes head*