Season 7 Discussion

[Pasha Kitty]

On 3/22/2018 at 10:44 PM, Kbo said:

I’m not a fan of the finished flip house. Too many different wood tones that didn’t go together. The vanity in the master bath didn’t go with anything. You could tell it wasn’t professionally designed. And I’m sorry, but why do they keep saying Erin is some great interior designer?  When she worked on Michaelas house it was just chatychkes everywhere.  To each their own, but to design a house so that it’s cohesive takes serious skill.  I haven’t seen any evidence that she has that skill set.

Zach and Whitney’s house looked much better when it was done. Made me nervous when those kids were taking walls out, though. Hope a professional determined they weren’t load-bearing. 

Yes, yes, and yes.  I found it silly that Whitney was saying so flippantly "take out this wall, take out that wall", with no question as to whether they were load bearing.  The finished product appears to show some added support in the form of that archway (if I remember correctly). 

Whitney is a very new real estate agent, so certainly she is no expert on the future value of the flip house.  I've been an agent for 19 years, so I know it takes years to learn the nuances of home values and how location/style/size etc. factor into the mix.  Hopefully the owner of the flip house did not base any of his numbers on Whit's off the cuff 'price analysis'.

[sATL]

7 hours ago, floridamom said:

I think Kelly wears those sleeveless vests to hide her true shape. I understand that after 19 kids, she's not going to have a swimsuit shape, but she is a bit heavy even for that. She has admitted it's hard for her to lose weight, so I think those vests are to hid in a bit.

The vests actually draw more attention to her shape. (1) they cut off right above her waist . (2) b/c the vests are made from thicker material  , they made her bust larger (3) since the vests do not appear to be able to be buttoned, they look too small. (4) I'm not totally convinced she is shopping for undergarmets/blouses/outfits at stores/brands made for her size and build - like Lane Bryant and  Gwynnie Bee. There are millions of women bigger than her, yet don't need the vests.

Yes she's has 19 kids and is 50+. But I think old fashioned cardio exercise and toning can help better than the vests. She was shown doing fast paced walking to induce Whitney's labor a few years back. She just needs to develop a regime for herself a couple of times a week.

And it looks like Erin is following in her fashion footsteps, with Michealla being a close 2nd. Michalla looked a little wider when she walked into Z&Ws house.

Edited March 25, 2018 by sATL

[Bridget]

47 minutes ago, sATL said:

The vests actually draw more attention to her shape. (1) they cut off right above her waist . (2) b/c the vests are made from thicker material  , they made her bust larger (3) since the vests do not appear to be able to be buttoned, they look too small. (4) I'm not totally convinced she is shopping for undergarmets/blouses/outfits at stores/brands made for her size and build - like Lane Bryant and  Gwynnie Bee. There are millions of women bigger than her, yet don't need the vests.

Yes she's has 19 kids and is 50+. But I think old fashioned cardio exercise and toning can help better than the vests. She was shown doing fast paced walking to induce Whitney's labor a few years back. She just needs to develop a regime for herself a couple of times a week.

And it looks like Erin is following in her fashion footsteps, with Michealla being a close 2nd. Michalla looked a little wider when she walked into Z&Ws house.

 

I agree - KJ is probably wearing tops that are too tight and covering up the unflattering bits with a vest. It does make her look heavier than she probably is, and it’s too bad she doesn’t pop into a second hand store to buy some tops that fit her properly.

She’s got to have at least 30-40 minutes that she can have to herself to exercise, even if it’s simply going for a power walk and then shooting the basketball through the hoop. It’s a  great workout for the upper body and I’d imagine her kids would love to play  basketball with her. Quality time together + exercise +  showing the girls that it’s not just for boys = everyone wins. I say this as a night owl, but if I had 1838845 kids at home, even if it means getting up before the kids, I’d find a way to work out. Heart disease in women is no joke! It’s be great to see her horseback riding too. 

Just realized this - How do Fundie home schoolers pass the PE portion of the curriculum? They can’t get a pass because they don’t play on a Club/travel sports team. We saw that with Poor Trace. (My heart still breaks when I think about why he did not make the Clown College team.)

I remember that KJ turned to Tori as a workout buddy for power walking to lose a few pounds a few seasons ago. Clearly it was pre-Bobby, because chasing him was the exercise Tori opted for once they met! Then Tori was complaining this season about her “fat arms” while wedding dress shopping and on Give me my Damn Ring Day, she hoped her sisters packed “something that will fit her.” I thought she looked great and healthy. 

I noticed that Erin, Michaella & Whitney all wore vests this week too. I didn’t know if it was a fashion fad in their area because of how prevalent the vests were, but covering up a bigger frame makes sense, except in Whitney’s case; she’s gotten too thin since baby’s last birth. Maybe she has Chad’s metabolism? I still think she’s a breath of fresh air and love her. 

I’m so glad you said something about M looking wider - I saw it too. Her lower body/hips were telling us all that she is definitely pear shaped (and there isn’t anything wrong with that at all). lI know she’s always been a bit bigger than her sisters, but the weight gain was noticeable, even next to her pregnant sister. Maybe she’s stress eating over fertility problems and homesickness? I suspect Erin won’t “bounce back” after the new baby. I have zero research to support my theory other than she looks like she’s gained more weight with baby #3 than she did with #1 or #2. 

In all seriousness though, I come from a zero tolerance for body shaming perspective.  I once ripped into a 9th grade male student, in the middle of my classroom, who made a joke about a very thin female student about needing to lose some weight. 

@cereality - that is the most perfect way of describing Chad: the oldest 31 year old alive. It’s so perfect that I want it on a tote bag!! 

Edited March 25, 2018 by Bridget

[woodscommaelle]

I LOVE that money tree. It was so pretty!  My aunt used to make those for me as a kid. Nice memory. ?

Kaycee is adorable. And Whitney. She seems so sophisticated. I like her.

Haha. Erin walking in and totally taking charge. That made me laugh. 

I'm being so complimentary tonight. Weird. Maybe I'm in a good mood?  ?

Edited March 30, 2018 by woodscommaelle

[woodscommaelle]

But, nobody else was late and they had the same weather and traffic as you, Tori.

I cannot comprehend people who are always late. I just don't get it. 

Bobby was funny bs'ing at the shower. Kind of cute that he was able to keep that dialogue up the whole time (or at least as much as we were shown).

Edited March 30, 2018 by woodscommaelle

[Bridget]

Gil is the greatest dad. The end.

Tori is not the greatest person. I dislike her more and more on each new episode, especially the closer it gets to the weddin'.

I understand not wanting to ugly cry at dinner with your dad in public, but she comes across as so cold and aloof. I'm not married yet, but I'm pretty sure being able to express one's self outwardly is key to communication. Bobby isn't a mind reader and she needs to learn to verbalize her feelings, especially when they're complimentary! She didn't seem grateful for any effort that was made for her. Would it have killed her to say something nice to Gil about that rad gift he made for her, that also incorporated the orchid colored ribbon that was one of her weddin' colors? Maybe it's because I stop to thank people to extend my appreciation and gratitude when the moments arise, but her stone cold act isn't a good look on anyone.

Let's just pretend she's going to get a job teaching...or works as one for a year before having a baby. Communicating explicitly, connecting with the kids and sharing personal anecdotes are daily occurrences! She won't have the option of acting like a damn robot. Good teachers can't be "awkward" at work nor can the students catch on that someone is nervous or anxious. Christian school or not, those kids will eat the teacher alive. I can't think of a worse career choice for her!

On a positive note, I love Josie's hair cut/style so much that I'm going to show photos to my stylist next week because I want my hair cut like hers. 

Only nine people at Erin's bridal shower? This is why RSVPs shouldn't ever be optional. If anyone's ever thrown a shower or party, they will understand. It's expensive to throw one and hosting one isn't ever about the money, I know. However, nothing is worse than seeing so much money, food, time spent prepping and that energy go down the drain.

I wonder if those nine guests were from Clown College or they were relatives...

That should've been a huge sign that they should probably have started to expand their social groups, and not just for gifts, but as a realization of "Wow. I've been so sheltered. I've got to make new friends ASAP!" (Trace, ahem, basketball, ahem)

[woodscommaelle]

Ugh Tori. Answer at least ONE EFFING QUESTION at your shower game. I feel like she was scared to answer bc she might say something wrong or something Bobby may take offense with.  

And she wanted to save her tears for her wedding day? Um, I wish I could ration my emotions like her. 'Nope, can't cry today bc I need to cry in seven days from now.' That's not how it works. Well, for me at least.

[flyingdi]

This season is not making Tori or Carlin look good.

[ehall1052]

Yes, what’s up with Tori’s “shyness”? For somebody who can’t keep her mouth shut, why was she suddenly so demure? Bobby needs a lifetime of prayer to keep up with this diva!

[Sew Sumi]

I also think that Tori might have clammed up because her answers didn't align with  Bobby's, and that just wouldn't do in that "how well do you know each other" game. 

She came off as sullen and greedy as she ripped open the gifts. She didn't thank anyone, and I didn't see anyone making the list for thank you notes. I thought that was especially rude. 

[Bridget]

12 minutes ago, XrystalPond said:

There is a difference between being shy/stoic and coming off like a spoiled brat. Tori seemed more annoyed and removed from everything. If she was honestly that shy and reserved, then the shower's organizers should have taken that into account. Being late and then refusing to participate made her seem like she didn't even want to be there. I've noted before that I'm not a shower kind of person given my heritage, but this seemed like torture for her and the guests. Some of the best ones I've gone to have been very casual and didn't include "games" or putting people on the spot. I appreciated a friend's shower that was basically just a chance to eat and see people from college. She had a book for us to write our best advice to her and her fiance, as well as a charity gift drive to collect household items for people moving out of a local homeless shelter. I think we also brought photos of us with the bride to do a photo collage (before the time of digital cameras and phones with cameras). 

I get that the family does these big huge showers with tons of people and presents. But maybe they should have tried a drop-in shower where people came during different times rather than all at once if the problem was being in front of a crowd. Or maybe they could have foregone the shower all together. I promise that most people wouldn't mind and would have still bought a gift for the wedding. 

 

2 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

I also think that Tori might have clammed up because her answers didn't align with  Bobby's, and that just wouldn't do in that "how well do you know each other" game. 

She came off as sullen and greedy as she ripped open the gifts. She didn't thank anyone, and I didn't see anyone making the list for thank you notes. I thought that was especially rude.

This!!

I’m not from the South, but is it a regional thing and quite normal for gifts to be opened at showers, especially when there are so many gifts to open? 

@Sew Sumi, I’m with you! Who made the list for thank you notes? I also wonder how many answers she would have gotten correct about Bobby and what that would say about rushing into marriage with someone because you can’t wait to have sex. I know they were together for two years, but much of it was long distance and when they were together, they always had a chaperone and couldn’t even kiss. (That still blows my mind) How well can you really know someone under those conditions? 

I also thought (and still do) that bridal showers were intended only for relatives, close family friends, the wedding party and other special people (future in-laws) in the celebrant’s life. Not every single person who is invited to the wedding is invited to the shower. To have 150+ people at a shower is insane to me. It made Tori & Bobby look like all they cared about was getting gifts. It would’ve been nice for them to spend time and visit with their guests instead of sitting on a stage and opening gifts. 

If Erin & Carlin were her attendants of honor, they should’ve organized the party, not Kelly Jo. 

As a guest, if I’m buying a bridal shower gift, a wedding gift and taking time to attend the events, the guest of honor better show up on time and make me fee like they want me to be there. I was flabbergasted when they were so late! I’d be mortified if I was late to my shower or if I was hosting one with an MIA bride-to-be.

Since her parents know she’s late to everything, they should’ve told her that it started 90 mins earlier than it really did to make sure she wouldn’t be late.

There was a reason we saw her siblings interacting with her guests and not Tori: because there probably wasn’t any footage to show!

On a positive note, did anyone see the way Addallee looked at Michaela when they arrived in the parking lot? She was so happy to have her back in town! She showed such a genuine expression of love and affection for her older sister. It made my heart so happy!

[PradaKitty]

I think Tori has massive stage fright. She just seems to have gone blank in front of all of those people. I also think she doesn’t like showing emotion in public.

Tori has always been in the middle of a large family when she can just sort of blend in, without being “on display@. When all of the attention is on her. She is unable to deal with it. 

[woodscommaelle]

1 hour ago, PradaKitty said:

I think Tori has massive stage fright. She just seems to have gone blank in front of all of those people. I also think she doesn’t like showing emotion in public.

Tori has always been in the middle of a large family when she can just sort of blend in, without being “on display@. When all of the attention is on her. She is unable to deal with it. 

That's totally fine if that's the case.  Then just don't have a shower or a big wedding.  Why must these people do this if it doesn't fit the bride's (or groom's) style, character, whatever???

[Bridget]

3 hours ago, XrystalPond said:

I would say that too, but her past behavior doesn't show that at all. She has stood up in front of others lots of times. She was/is taking education/teacher prep classes at Crown College where she has said that she has to get up and present in front of groups of students all the time. Katie I could see being shy or even Josie, but Tori is hardly a wallflower type. Additionally, the whole family has performed for live audiences quite and bit, including solos from most all the older children (Tori too). 

If she has such issues, her mother and sisters would surely know and should have been more sensitive when planning the shower events and activities. I have friends who are painfully introverted and shy who I would never expect to stand in front of people or say something heartfelt without coaching and prepping. 

Tori should not have been surprised that people would attend her shower or give her gifts. It would have been smart for her to have prepared something to say if she felt that she couldn't express her emotions and gratitude adequately. 

 

From my take on it, yes. However, that is a good reason to do a drop-in type shower where people can stop by any time in the afternoon or whenever. They hand you a gift and you can open it then instead of making it feel like the guests are watching everyone open gifts and comparing what someone gave versus someone else. My father's side of the family is very Southern traditional when it comes to those things. One of the less bothersome of my cousins on that side of the family was sure to thank all of the guests for coming and then the hostess announced that the bride and group would open gifts following the shower with all who wanted to stay welcome. That way some of the more traditional people stayed and the rest of us could get on out there. 

One thing that stood out to me was that Kelly Jo was front and center on it. Typically, that would be considered rude in some old-fashioned, Southern situations. The immediate family doesn't host the shower. It is hosted by the maid of honor or bridesmaids with the mother of the bride and mother of the groom as just typical guests. Some may have other experiences with it, but I know one of my father's sisters had a shower for one of her daughters at a church. The shade throwing went on for years about that being "tacky" and like the family was asking for gifts. Given how many people were invited, etc. it would probably be too much for one of the sisters to financially afford it or one of Tori's friends. 

 

The shower and Kelly Jo's involvement might have just been for television, but it really didn't help the perception that has been created this season about her attitude. Interesting how she had so many opinions and no trouble sharing them before her courtship and engagement versus now. 

Go on with your bad self!!! ☺

Perfect summation!

Her own brothers even know she's not a fan of being in the spotlight for certain things. I wonder what kind of shower they would have planned....?

[sATL]

I don't think opening gifts at a bridal or baby shower is regional - and tied to the south.

I think with the invent of registries, people living far away, gift-cards/cash/checks/money orders/paypal/venmo ,  couples already having the basic household needs, the gift opening is less of a spectacle . No on really cares to see a toaster, blender, dishes, stemware, towels, sheets, gift card to Walmart/BedBathBeyond/Lowes/HomeDepot, etc, anymore.

What was extremely ODD is 150+ people, aged 0-99 . What is worse - the bride-to-be doesn't want to be there.

Coming late was a sign of disrespect & sometimes dis-interested . Tori knew there would/could be traffic and it was raining. What the hell was so important that that she was that far away , for that long, in the first place?

I put some of the blame on this "shower" on Kelly - Did you not consult with Tori/Bobby on what they wanted? If Tori is known to be late, have the event at the house - before she has a the chance to run off. If Tori is "shy" in large groups - why put her on a stage playing 20 questions? They should have did that exercise in one of their pre-marital counseling sessions first.  Why not have games where this multitude of people can participate in - like Bingo?

I hope the rest of the remaining daughters put Bridezilla Kelly in check .

Edited March 31, 2018 by sATL

[lookeyloo]

And how much is producer driven to give us something to talk about. Scripted reality. Not documentary. 

[Absolom]

Ratings for this week:  227K viewers and a .08 rating.

[BitterApple]

I'm a bit late to the party, but I've been catching up on episodes, and wow, everyone is spot-on about Chad. He's aging rapidly and starting to take on that same "fuck my life" expression I often see with Bin Seewald. I never understand people who complicate their lives more than necessary (i.e., adding goats, dogs and babies you can't fit into your already bursting-at-the-seams house). 

I was definitely getting the vibe they were all fishing to be some Fundie combination of Chip/Joanna/Tarek/Christina with the way they talked about flipping and selling houses, but that's a tough business and you really have to know what the hell you're doing if you don't want to lose your shirt.

Zach and Whit's house came out beautifully, that flip was just, no. I love log-style homes but that place was cheesy.

I find Tori and Carlin to be utterly unlikable in every sense of the word. 

[BitterApple]

On 3/17/2018 at 2:30 PM, cereality said:

All the older SIBLINGS seem protective of Michaela - Alyssa with the advance call; Zach saying he hoped the new baby would be Michaelas. Yet Kelly screamed like a LOON for far too long re OMG EIGHT grand babies. We get it - you’re thrilled but screaming like that and going on and on in front of your childless daughter clarifies one more time that producing babies is all that matters. And then when she is finished screaming like a mental patient, it’s time to eat and with M&B standing 2 ft away she HAS TO say - moms first. Uh how about ladies first? That ensures that the moms can get food for babies without singling out the childless ladies.

I caught that as well. Is Kelly really that unaware or is she passive-aggressively pointing out that Michael is failing in the one "job" she's been trained to do all her life? When she was screaming about eight grandbabies, I thought "Just go ahead and dig the knife a little deeper."

It's getting to the point where I'm genuinely concerned for Michael's mental health. She's put on a lot of weight and seemed like she was about to burst into tears during her TH after the reveal. 

Edited March 31, 2018 by BitterApple

[Kiss my mutt]

I wonder if Michael is on fertility drugs and that might account for some of the weight gain. Hell, I feel protective of her too! 

[Sew Sumi]

I'm not certain that fertility drugs are allowed in IBLP. God's timing and all that...

[woodscommaelle]

3 hours ago, BitterApple said:

I caught that as well. Is Kelly really that unaware or is she passive-aggressively pointing out that Michael is failing in the one "job" she's been trained to do all her life?

It's getting to the point where I'm genuinely concerned for Michael's mental health. She's put on a lot of weight and seemed like she was about to burst into tears during her TH after the reveal. 

If that first paragraph is true that is really really sad.

Second paragraph: Yes. I mentioned this before: she looks like she's about to break, mentally.  And that's very sad, too.

[woodscommaelle]

29 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

I'm not certain that fertility drugs are allowed in IBLP. God's timing and all that...

Good god that's very sad, too. If there's a tool that can help you get pregnant but your religion tells you no, then why would that be your religion? 

[Sew Sumi]

What's interesting is that they are allowed to take medications to SUSTAIN a pregnancy once conceived. Kelly took progesterone with her last few after a series of miscarriages, and of course we know about Erin's heparin shots. Kelly adamantly defended this practice in a blog post a few years ago. 

[Lisa418722]

Michaela is the one fundie I can feel sorry for when it comes to wanting children.  In the episode when Alyssa announced her pregnancy, Brandon made the comment that Michaela loved children.  It seems to me (and this is my opinion only) that he might be OK with not having children. But since Michaela grew up where getting married and having as many children as God allows, you can tell this is hard for her. She loves children, where some of the other fundies (looking at you Jill and Derick) having children is expected even if you don't really want to have umpteen children. 

[Annabel11]

On 1/19/2018 at 9:17 PM, Adeejay said:

Say what you want about the Duggars, but at least, Michelle didn't beg any of her potential son in-law to propose (Kelly with Bobby) or ask for an engagement ring (Kelly with Evan).  That woman is like a modern day Mrs. Bennett (Pride and Prejudice). It's embarrassing!

And also the way she  coerced Brandon to ask Michael to marry him. Right in front of his embarrassed looking parents.  She is insufferable and her daughter's have picked up the trait. Torie was downright rude at her wedding shower saying she was uncomfortable. Shows lack of character and breeding to be so selfish she couldn't feign gratitude and made her guest uncomfortable. I don't think Bobby quite knows what he's getting into with her. 

Edited April 1, 2018 by Annabel11

[Absolom]

It's a tough line for Kelly.  You still want and need to be excited for the babies that are on the way.  If Kelly isn't as excited for number 8 or 12 as she was for the first one, then someone else is going to feel slighted.  The whole family can't and shouldn't go hushed and mournful and not enjoying the babies on the way because one person isn't having any.  Michaela probably wouldn't want the family to change because of her.  It would probably make her feel even worse.   There is no easy path except letting letting Michaela know in advance and letting it be her choice to be there or not for announcements. 

[BitterApple]

1 hour ago, Annabel11 said:

 I don't think Bobby quite knows what he's getting into with her. 

I don't think so either. During the engagement epi, his parents did not look thrilled to be there and you can tell they think Tori and the Bates family are low-class. Tori was so obnoxious and rude throughout, demanding to see the ring and not showing the slightest appreciation for all the effort Bobby put in to make the day special. I guess guys will overlook a lot when they'e desperate to get laid.

2 hours ago, Lisa418722 said:

  It seems to me (and this is my opinion only) that he might be OK with not having children. 

I agree. I think Brandon genuinely feels bad for Michael, but he's not as emotionally invested in having children as she is. 

1 hour ago, Absolom said:

The whole family can't and shouldn't go hushed and mournful and not enjoying the babies on the way because one person isn't having any.  

I don't think anyone is saying they should, but Kelly doesn't strike me as being particularly sensitive to the issue. The "mothers first" comment right in front of the daughter who's been struggling for two years to get pregnant was a crappy thing to do.

[floridamom]

^^^^^All of this^^^^. Great post. I agree that Bobby really had no idea who he's marrying and that this parents aren't that thrilled for him to get stuck with her and her ginormous family.

Brandon would be fine just being good roommates with Michaela, let alone have lots of children with her. He's happy sharing the 'space' with her...period.

[TeamNoOne]

I fault Kelly for Torri's behavior, she was basically set up by her mom to fail. This is a girl who clearly doesn't want to have a big wedding and yet is being coerced into having one, largely by her mother. It's expected that she have this massive wedding that she doesn't want, then she's called rude when she doesn't take an interest in that which she doesn't want. The same can be said for the shower. She obviously doesn't want to be up on stage, being in that position with everyone focused on her made her uncomfortable. She's alluded to this in the past. So why is Kelly forcing her on stage? Torri seemed perfectly comfortable walking around the room and interacting with people on an individual basis. Why wasn't that good enough for Kelly? I'm from the "suck it up kid" school of parenting but this is Torri's wedding shower. Why not put her in a position where she can succeed rather than put in her in a position where she will predictably fail?

Who has 150 people at a wedding shower? Why were the men there? What's the point of having a wedding reception when you've already had a shower that's bigger than most people's wedding? Wedding showers have historically been limited women, usually just close friends and family members. They're usually small affairs, unless the bride has a large family in close proximity to the shower. I just can't wrap my head around having 150 men, women and children at a shower. Aren't the men bored right out of their mind? Is the free Costco sandwich really worth it?

[Sew Sumi]

These are the Bateses. You'll be lucky to get half a sandwich.

[BitterApple]

Tori's been so snotty throughout the entire process, it's hard for me to feel much sympathy for her. When Kelly's sister was trying to get input for the cake, Tori said she didn't care because it wasn't important to her. Okay, I get you're the anti-bride, but that was beyond rude and classless to say to a family member who's baking cakes for 500 for FREE as your wedding gift. 

[Absolom]

On 4/1/2018 at 8:29 AM, BitterApple said:

The "mothers first" comment right in front of the daughter who's been struggling for two years to get pregnant was a crappy thing to do.

Perhaps she should have said parents first - it was to get plates for the kids not because someone was a mama.  It's quite reasonable to let the people getting the kiddie plates go first.  It wasn't an intentional slight to Michael and may be something she says at every family gathering, but this time it was left in the episode.   I do the grandkids' plates at Thanksgiving and I cut in front of people to do that and they all smile because they know it's for little ones. 

[BitterApple]

On 3/29/2018 at 10:43 PM, Bridget said:

 

Only nine people at Erin's bridal shower? This is why RSVPs shouldn't ever be optional. If anyone's ever thrown a shower or party, they will understand. It's expensive to throw one and hosting one isn't ever about the money, I know. However, nothing is worse than seeing so much money, food, time spent prepping and that energy go down the drain.

 

Poor Erin! That's mortifying, no matter which way you cut it. I think that's one of the drawbacks of a culture where you invite a ton of people to events that are traditionaly limited to a handful of close friends. Between the way these Fundies marry and breed, people in their circles must get shower burn-out after a while. I know I would.

Edited April 4, 2018 by BitterApple

[TeamNoOne]

On 4/3/2018 at 8:51 AM, XrystalPond said:

While it's hardly fair for the family to have to censor themselves or walk on eggshells, one would think that Kelly might be cognizant of her daughter's feelings and want to make things so that Michael feels comfortable and loved when she comes back to visit. She would typically want that for each of her children. I continue to be impressed with how the older children seem so protective and sensitive to each other. They must have learned it from someone. 

Kelly has 19 children, she can't make them all happy with every single comment at all times. We don't even know if Michael was bothered by the "mom's first" comment or not.

[BitterApple]

1 hour ago, XrystalPond said:

No, she can't and shouldn't be expected to do so. As I said, she might have spoken to Michael at some point. The fact that Alyssa called Michael prior to the announcement and that Erin has sought out her sister to be supportive of the tests and finding answers indicates that it is a subject of conversation that is touchy for Michael. 

 

I agree and I think it's so sweet how the older set of siblings are so gracious and sensitive to one another. I remember Erin struggling with those miscarriages but still showing up to events for Whitney's pregnancy. Alyssa having enough emotinal awareness not to spring a baby announcement on a sister struggling with infertility. Zach hoping the reveal would be that Michael was finally pregnant. For all their nutty religious beliefs, they really are a bunch of good eggs. 

I know people generally like Kelly, but IMO, something about her is "off." The way she's so pushy and intrusive with her daughters' boyfriends, the comments at the picnic, the fact that she and Gil would go out for steak dinners and bring home scraps for the kids to fight over. It gives me shades of JRod.

[gunderda]

On 3/30/2018 at 12:43 AM, Bridget said:

 

Only nine people at Erin's bridal shower? This is why RSVPs shouldn't ever be optional. If anyone's ever thrown a shower or party, they will understand. It's expensive to throw one and hosting one isn't ever about the money, I know. However, nothing is worse than seeing so much money, food, time spent prepping and that energy go down the drain.

I REALLY want to know why only 9 people showed up.  That's less than their entire family.  Were they not famous enough yet?? They had been on tv but she got married in between tv appearances. Did the mail man toss 90% of the invites?? I feel bad for her though. 

On 3/30/2018 at 1:14 PM, Bridget said:

This!!

I’m not from the South, but is it a regional thing and quite normal for gifts to be opened at showers, especially when there are so many gifts to open? 

I'm from the midwest and it's very normal for gifts to be open at any event, no matter the amount.  Bridal shower, baby shower, kid's birthday party... anything. 

 

On 4/1/2018 at 9:17 AM, Absolom said:

 There is no easy path except letting letting Michaela know in advance and letting it be her choice to be there or not for announcements. 

But I wonder.. why did Alyssa need to make a big announcement for baby #3? Why all the separate envelopes? Why not just say "oh hey, by the way, we're expecting again!" 

 

I know a lot of people who have gone out on their own in the construction/general contracting field with young kids with families to support and if you do it right you can be very successful. So I'm not worried about Chad.  He seems very capable. And no one in that industry looks young. 

[BitterApple]

2 hours ago, gunderda said:

I REALLY want to know why only 9 people showed up.  That's less than their entire family.  Were they not famous enough yet?? They had been on tv but she got married in between tv appearances. Did the mail man toss 90% of the invites?? I feel bad for her though. 

I'm trying to remember when Erin got married. Is it possible the shower was held close to a holiday weekend or school vacation when many families are out of town? I know Chad's people are from Oklahoma, so I can see them not wanting to put out the expense of traveling to a shower when they were already paying to go to the wedding, but other than that I don't know. Erin is way more likable than Tori, yet Tori had a decent crowd, so maybe it was just a fluke that nobody showed.

Edited April 4, 2018 by BitterApple

[DkNNy79]

2 hours ago, gunderda said:

I'm from the midwest and it's very normal for gifts to be open at any event, no matter the amount.  Bridal shower, baby shower, kid's birthday party... anything. 

 

I'm from NY and its very normal for gifts to be open at bridal and baby showers. 

However, I went to a bridal shower over the weekend and they requested that the gifts be wrapped in clear wrapping paper so that they didn't have to open it.  That was the first time I've heard of such a request.  However, the shower had to have at least 100 attendees, so I can see why opening all the gifts would not be feasible.

[Bridget]

34 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

I'm trying to remember when Erin got married. Is it possible the shower was held close to a holiday weekend or school vacation when many families are out of town? I know Chad's people are from Oklahoma, so I can see them not wanting to put out the expense of traveling to a shower when they were already paying to go to the wedding, but other than that I don't know. Erin is way more likable than Tori, yet Tori had a decent crowd, so maybe it was just a fluke that nobody showed.

They got married on November 2, 2013. (Thx Google!)

Maybe Chad's family planned on joining them in TN for their first Thanksgiving as a married couple...and to make sure that the turkey ended up being cooked thoroughly?

[gunderda]

1 hour ago, BitterApple said:

I'm trying to remember when Erin got married. Is it possible the shower was held close to a holiday weekend or school vacation when many families are out of town? I know Chad's people are from Oklahoma, so I can see them not wanting to put out the expense of traveling to a shower when they were already paying to go to the wedding, but other than that I don't know. Erin is way more likable than Tori, yet Tori had a decent crowd, so maybe it was just a fluke that nobody showed.

Perhaps she wasn't super likable back then... I remember she irritated the shit out of me because she always talked in a baby voice and after she got married she finally spoke normally and i said THANK GOD.   

[Kiss my mutt]

Was this with Erin’s first baby? Maybe the interest dwindled after the second. 

[BitterApple]

24 minutes ago, Kiss my mutt said:

Was this with Erin’s first baby? Maybe the interest dwindled after the second. 

No, this was in reference to her bridal shower. She said they were expecting about 150 people and nobody showed up. She was laughing about it in her TH, but I'm sure it was awful at the time.

[Kiss my mutt]

Thank you @BitterApple for answering my endless questions around here!

[Absolom]

9 hours ago, gunderda said:

But I wonder.. why did Alyssa need to make a big announcement for baby #3? Why all the separate envelopes? Why not just say "oh hey, by the way, we're expecting again!" 

They have to keep finding episode fodder to keep the show going.

[andromeda331]

I'm really surprised too only 9 people showed up give their fathers both being so high up in Gothard. I'd thought a lot would show up because of that.  

[TeamNoOne]

18 hours ago, BitterApple said:

I'm trying to remember when Erin got married. Is it possible the shower was held close to a holiday weekend or school vacation when many families are out of town? I know Chad's people are from Oklahoma, so I can see them not wanting to put out the expense of traveling to a shower when they were already paying to go to the wedding, but other than that I don't know. Erin is way more likable than Tori, yet Tori had a decent crowd, so maybe it was just a fluke that nobody showed.

I'm wondering if maybe they sent invitations out too close to the shower. Another alternative is that there was a mass Gothard/ATI wedding elsewhere on the same date.

[Adeejay]

On ‎3‎/‎30‎/‎2018 at 1:43 AM, Bridget said:

Gil is the greatest dad. The end.

Tori is not the greatest person. I dislike her more and more on each new episode, especially the closer it gets to the weddin'

I think Tori is ungrateful and rude.  I didn't like the way she treated her dad and the guests at the shower.  Would it have killed her to smile and be more agreeable?  Poor Bobby!  

[flyingdi]

I agree, whichever child you are, Tori is a party pooper!

You're not interested in showers, arts and crafts, planning weddings or cake?  What on earth are you interested in, Tori?

[absolutelyido]

5 hours ago, flyingdi said:

I agree, whichever child you are, Tori is a party pooper!

You're not interested in showers, arts and crafts, planning weddings or cake?  What on earth are you interested in, Tori?

Looks like she's going to be a whole lot of fun to be married to. Good luck Bobby.