S02.E09: You've Yacht To Be Kidding Me

[IKnowRight]

Cary, Cary, Cary...Why am I not shocked to think there were shady moves on your part to snag your husband?  (Mark? Ick.  But whatever.) 

Here's some advice.  If you play with a married man, and end up wife #3, don't irritate the gossips in town.  Do whatever you can to avoid conflict! If she stayed cool, calm and collected and does have skeletons in her closet, your life would be easier.  Don't throw shade, especially if you have something to hide.  

 

Is it right that Leeann (and their wierd, wealthy friend, Heidi? was that her name?) and whoever else in town gossips about you?  Absolutely not.  It's juvenile.  This is not in Leeann or Brandy's defense, but geez, don't give anyone red meat.  If Cary was his nanny, or his simply his nurse and Mark stepped out on his wife, there's going to be heat.  If she lived in my town, I would have a hard time being buds with Cary.

 

 We all do dumb things and make mistakes, some big ones, so move on, keep your chin up and mind your own business.  Eventually everyone will stay out of your business and maybe even like you!!

[Stan39]

Dear lord, Kameron is the least fun person I've ever seen. Even excluding the overreaction to the dildo, I have yet to see her engage with anyone else or do something for someone other than herself. I guess she's nice to her daughter? For everything else, she's either completely self involved, judging people, or causing issues. Even if you don't agree with Brandi's actions, Brandi at least tries to be nice to other people or do stuff for others. 

 

Wow, glad I'm not married to Leanne or Cary (for a multitude of reasons) but... Those were the weakest rebuttals to someone calling your husband out for having a small penis or being gay. Way to defend their honor, lol. I don't think either husband should have been called out like that (especially Richard, who seems like a genuinely good person), but c'mon ladies, you need to be a little stronger with your denials. I'm not even saying I believe the rumors, it's just that Leanne and (especially) Cary didn't really say much that they were false. 

[angelamh66]

I find Brandi and Stephanie funny for purposes of this show only.  In real life, their kind of humor is not my kind of humor (although I do love Brandi's impressions).  I am more snarky than goofy.  That said, Kameron is an insufferable asshole.  Going the "I wasn't raised that way" route is always going to make you look like a self-righteous pain in the ass.  If it just isn't funny to her, just say that.  No need to hop on the moral high horse over it. 

[ghoulina]

22 hours ago, ShawnaLanne said:

She did show a picture if a nice looking package.

Right. But she appeared mostly calm and laughing it off, as if she knew it was nonsense. Cary was much more irate. Possibly because she knows there's truth to the allegations. 

1 hour ago, angelamh66 said:

I find Brandi and Stephanie funny for purposes of this show only.  In real life, their kind of humor is not my kind of humor (although I do love Brandi's impressions).  I am more snarky than goofy.  That said, Kameron is an insufferable asshole.  Going the "I wasn't raised that way" route is always going to make you look like a self-righteous pain in the ass.  If it just isn't funny to her, just say that.  No need to hop on the moral high horse over it. 

Same. I could NOT deal with those two in real life. But I enjoy them on TV, and the fact that they're riling up that pretentious asshole, Kameron, makes me enjoy it even more. 

[telemachus2]

Brandi & Steph would be more amusing to grade-schoolers than most adult viewers.  I give Kameron a little latitude if she feels she has to represent a more sophisticated face to the public than the juvenilely disgusting, seemingly endless fecal fascination portrayed by B & S last season.

[WireWrap]

44 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

Right. But she appeared mostly calm and laughing it off, as if she knew it was nonsense. Cary was much more irate. Possibly because she knows there's truth to the allegations. 

 

Having someone say your bf's penis is small is not comparable to someone claiming your husband is having sex with men on the regular. Yes, the small penis comment is mean/childish/petty but claiming you are nothing more than a beard for your husband is ugly and said to discredit your marriage/disparage the wife. Add to the fact that 1 guy has no children and the other has 3, 2 of which are old enough to hear the rumors LeAnn is spreading about their father on national TV. 

[Jel]

If he's worried about it he should probably stop getting his dick sucked at The Roundup.

 

Kidding!

(Slapped my own wrist for that one).

[sasha206]

On 10/9/2017 at 10:57 PM, Ksissy said:

Stephanie and Brandi are like Lucy and Ethel.  The rest just take everything so seriously.  Easy breezy beautiful Boob job...that was funny!

I couldn't stand them Season 1.  Now I love them.  Both are actually very funny.  The voices grate, but I love their humor.  Also love LeeAnne although I realize she's cast herself as the reality show villain.

[ShawnaLanne]

4 hours ago, telemachus2 said:

Brandi & Steph would be more amusing to grade-schoolers than most adult viewers.  I give Kameron a little latitude if she feels she has to represent a more sophisticated face to the public than the juvenilely disgusting, seemingly endless fecal fascination portrayed by B & S last season.

I get trying to hold onto some dignity. Kim Fields on RHoA managed to do that without being a killjoy. She wasn't asked to come back because she refused to participate in things she didn't agree with,  and didn't bring enough drama,  but she didn't come across as a pretentious,  social climbing twit with zero "class" while lecturing everyone else on class. 

Edited October 13, 2017 by ShawnaLanne

[princelina]

23 hours ago, PhilMarlowe2 said:

I guess I'm in the minority, because I don't find Brandi and Stephanie's hijinks to be all that funny - they really aren't *that* witty, but they seem so impressed with themselves. It all feels very camera conscious. Honestly, I can't stand Nene, but she has made me chuckle or even laugh out loud way more than Brandi ever has. And I just can't find Stephanie likeable at all because 1) she is so completely boring 2) she consistently uses a baby voice, which is my biggest pet peeve. Also, Brandi is f-ing obnoxious with that dildo. I don't like Kameron (at all), but when someone tells you to stop, you stop. The end. But what bothered me even more than the fact that Brandi used the dildo on Kameron's feet is that she kept insisting afterward, "Yeah, I crossed her boundaries and I don't care!" Um, in what world is that okay? You have no idea of Kameron's background or past, and it's just not cool to take such conscious delight in completely disrespecting someone's stated boundaries.

I certainly don't think they are witty :). But I appreciate their willingness to have fun and not constantly be aggrieved or have to "discuss" things until long after the dead horse has been sent to the glue factory.  Frankly I was a little embarrassed for the rest of them who couldn't have fun on the beach without it being planned and supervised by a group of 3 (or more?) men.  And I know it was supposed to be "team building" but let's be real - it was a race and beach volleyball.  Normal people just do that on their own :)

[Suck It Trebek]

I cannot stand when a man calls women (especially those that are older than him) "girls" like during the beach team building exercise. Repeatedly.

 

Also? Viva D'Andra! Love her!

[booboopbedoo]

On 12/10/2017 at 1:18 PM, ghoulina said:

She did show a picture if a nice looking package.

Guys in the clubs used to put a potato in their pants

[pasdetrois]

Quote

I cannot stand when a man calls women (especially those that are older than him) "girls" like during the beach team building exercise. Repeatedly.

The Housewives all seem to love it. It fits their delusion of youth.

[Jel]

On 10/13/2017 at 3:57 AM, Suck It Trebek said:

I cannot stand when a man calls women (especially those that are older than him) "girls" like during the beach team building exercise. Repeatedly.

 

Also? Viva D'Andra! Love her!

I don't really like "Ladies" either because it sounds like another stupid euphemism, but I'll take that over "girls" any day.

There's nothing bad about just being a regular woman, not one with a title (lady) and over the age of 12. 

Just saying "Hey women" sounds weird, too.  What I really need is a name for cranky-about-those-words female person.

(And not "bitch"! ;)

[RedheadZombie]

On ‎10‎/‎12‎/‎2017 at 5:07 PM, WireWrap said:

Having someone say your bf's penis is small is not comparable to someone claiming your husband is having sex with men on the regular. Yes, the small penis comment is mean/childish/petty but claiming you are nothing more than a beard for your husband is ugly and said to discredit your marriage/disparage the wife. Add to the fact that 1 guy has no children and the other has 3, 2 of which are old enough to hear the rumors LeAnn is spreading about their father on national TV. 

Doesn't Rich have a daughter?  I thought we saw (season one) Leanne and Rich take her to a restaurant for her birthday.

[WireWrap]

10 minutes ago, RedheadZombie said:

Doesn't Rich have a daughter?  I thought we saw (season one) Leanne and Rich take her to a restaurant for her birthday.

It's possible, I don't remember her though and LeAnn never mentions her when she talks about him/getting married.

[biakbiak]

10 minutes ago, RedheadZombie said:

Doesn't Rich have a daughter?  I thought we saw (season one) Leanne and Rich take her to a restaurant for her birthday.

Yes, she got the cheapest birthday gift to ever appear on a Housewives show: a pair of Birkenstocks!

[ladle]

I feel for Stephanie, but airing her child's struggles on national TV seems very exploitative and not at all fun to watch. 

[SunnyBeBe]

What's the deal with D'Andre's makeup?  It's like a white mask.  Leanne has the look a little too.  I hope after seeing this season on tv, they can make some adjustments.  It's unfortunate.  Do you think they did their own makeup or did they have help from production? 

[Sun-Bun]

Finally watched this episode...and WOW, I can't get over how much Kameron is a nasty snob-and-a-half!! Also, a total bore on a trip...she could definitely use some of that sexual chocolate to help shove away that stick so far up her ass.

I mean, I get that Kameron doesn't think Brandi and her dildo hyjinks are remotely funny and thinks that she and Stephanie are just drunken messes, but repeatedly calling them out to the rest of the cast and audience as being "trashy" is some first-class snooty meangirl bullshit too. And FYI, public class call-out's are just as trashy as drunken dildo chasing, you butterfaced fake-blonde troll.

Stephanie drunkenly crawling around on the boat: hilarious!! That would so be me. Get on the big boat and get a little drunk? Just crawl on and keep that tequila a'flowing.

The one gal who has handled herself with exquisite grace, class and good-nature for the entire trip so far has been D'Andrea---what an awesome travel buddy she has been so far, just rolling with the punches and going with the flow, simply laughing and commenting on the silliness of everything. I'm totally loving her so far, gaudy makeup aside!

LeeAnn simply rolling her eyes and calmly disputing any comments on her man's package was perfection. THAT is how you handle stupid gossip like a pro, unlike weepy Cary and her histrionics---I know part of that might've just been the tequila and first shock of hearing it, but still, calm down and don't let the ladies see you sweat if that's indeed a gross local rumor.

Unfortunately, looks like LeeAnn will be taking a one way ticket straight back to Crazytown next episode; what is it with this chick and her obsession with breaking plates??

Edited October 15, 2017 by Sun-Bun

[80sBaby]

Trying again today with this show....I just can't. I don't like any of these women and I do not find Brandi and Stephanie funny. They try way to hard with their "antics" IMO.

Brandi also looks like a little demon sometimes with those black, beedy eyes. Some scenes I'm wondering are her eyes closed.. What's going on?? Creepy.

[dosodog]

On 10/9/2017 at 8:25 PM, HunterHunted said:

 

Cary is a shady fucking liar who absolutely said that shit about Brandi's doctor. She's always sniping at LeeAnne. The thing that would allow her to take the high road when it comes to LeeAnne is if her fucking ass would actually take the high road, but instead she's as low down, gossipy, and back shabby as LeeAnne. These two are more alike than they'd ever care to admit.

 

They really are more alike than they would admit.  Mirror images of their worst qualities.  I give points for Leanne knowing she's nasty.  Cary is still deluded in thinking she's a "good" person who lashes out when scared.  No.  You're an asshole just like Leanne.

On 10/10/2017 at 1:21 AM, bichonblitz said:

I have a feeling Mark and Cary have a lot of skeletons in their closet that they would like to keep quiet and that's why they are always so defensive. Wrong show to be on, folks. 

They're next to her Birkins.  Who wants to pretend to be Cary and we'll break into her house and get Mark the skeletons out of the closet!

 

On 10/10/2017 at 6:26 AM, pasdetrois said:

We all (me included) criticize Mark's efforts to control Cary, but let's not forget her bragging in season one that when they started their relationship she took over his appearance and molded him into what she wanted. She made multiple comments about how bad his appearance was and how she dictated how he should change.

She's a classic manipulative gold-digger, starting with going after a married man who has children.

This!  I still believe Cary is the controlling one in their relationship.  Mark whines and I think it's because he has no real say in anything in his life. Her TH revolve around how inept he is, how bad he looked, how he didn't want another kid, how he clings to her, how he wants her attached to his side all the time.

It's always negative. 

On 10/10/2017 at 7:12 AM, ghoulina said:

This is why I like Deandra. She's not as trashy as some of the other women, but she doesn't ride around on her high horse, acting like she's above them all. She can call out BS, but she does so in a calm, respectable manner. And she picks her battles. She can sit back and enjoy a little fun, without dragging herself through the mud as well. She's a good balance. 

I also like Deandra overall.  Which is why I think Leanne can't be that much of a nut job in real life.  Why would she be friends with her?  Why would Rich being marrying her?

On 10/10/2017 at 0:59 PM, AuntiePam said:

It was funny (weird funny, not ha ha funny) at the end of the yacht trip -- Leeanne "hears her name" and rushes over to the women to remind them how crazy she is  "Pay attention to meeeeeeeeeeee!"  No one was talking about her.  The heat was off.  She just won't be ignored.

They were talking about her.  They were rehashing what was just said.  They were also talking negatively about her.  Brandi was saying how she loved her, but hated to love her.  Cary was lying once again saying she was only joking about Rich's pens size, but Leanne takes it too far.

 

On 10/12/2017 at 3:08 PM, sasha206 said:

I couldn't stand them Season 1.  Now I love them.  Both are actually very funny.  The voices grate, but I love their humor.  Also love LeeAnne although I realize she's cast herself as the reality show villain.

I think I'm fully embracing Leanne and what she brings to the show.  I recognize she's an asshole, narcissistic and brings the crazy.  She's also fun and has a sense of humor.

Dallas would be boring without her throwing a glass occasionally. I hope at this point, production is giving Leanne a sugar glass.

21 hours ago, biakbiak said:

Yes, she got the cheapest birthday gift to ever appear on a Housewives show: a pair of Birkenstocks!

And she was appreciative!  No tainting from the RH franchise!

[lunastartron]

11 hours ago, ladle said:

I feel for Stephanie, but airing her child's struggles on national TV seems very exploitative and not at all fun to watch. 

Admittedly, I don't like Stephanie as is. 

But tearfully bemoaning how you felt like a bad mom because you were preoccupied by your tumultuous friendship with Brandi to the detriment of your child?

Well, then you are a bad mom. 

[ShawnaLanne]

20 hours ago, lunastartron said:

Admittedly, I don't like Stephanie as is. 

But tearfully bemoaning how you felt like a bad mom because you were preoccupied by your tumultuous friendship with Brandi to the detriment of your child?

Well, then you are a bad mom. 

Yeah. I'm not big on mom shaming, we all do our ( myself here) at times shitty best, but that is some crappy momming there.

[ladle]

Is it written somewhere on the Housewife boilerplate that you must refer to using the restroom as "going potty"?  I've never heard a grown woman use that expression when speaking to another adult, except on Housewife shows. 

[OnceSane]

6 minutes ago, ladle said:

Is it written somewhere on the Housewife boilerplate that you must refer to using the restroom as "going potty"?  I've never heard a grown woman use that expression when speaking to another adult, except on Housewife shows. 

I say it, but I have son who turns five next month.  It's a habit.  You get so used to asking your kid(s), "do you have to potty?" Or telling them, "Mommy has to potty and then we can leave," you automatically say it instead of using your adult words.  LOL

[ladle]

I mean, I have a three year old, so I guess I can understand that... I've never said that to another adult though!  (That I know of...)  Totally not judging though, as I definitely do a lot of other embarrassing mom stuff in mixed company.  :)  Also, if that's the explanation, D'Andra and Leann really have no excuse.

[RedheadZombie]

Brilliant dumb blonde Kameron has made up a new word - legitely.  Wish I could be the person to tell her how dumb she is.

[ghoulina]

I'll admit I say "potty" to adults - my husband, my sisters. We're all parents of young kids. It's just out of habit. 

[yourmomiseasy]

Just rewatched this episode during the weekly marathon.  I think the real WTF for me is LeAnne calling the dildo "El Senor Hottie Blackie."