S05.E14: Intimacy Pt. 2

[Snarklepuss]

6 hours ago, LennieBriscoe said:

My maternal great-grandparents were from Palermo. My grandfather (and Slovak grandmother) eventually moved to Bayonne,  NJ. My paternal great-grandparents were from County Donegal and settled in the coal-mining area of eastern Pennsylvania.

So I have "this Sicilian thing" (tm Kay Corleone), the Molly Maguires, and Jersey in my DNA. Stereotypes presented for entertainment purposes don't bug me at all! (Take the cannoli.)

My husband's father was born in Donegal.  We went there 12 years ago and I met several of his cousins.  Ireland is really beautiful.  He also has a cousin living in Bayonne on his mother's side that we visit once in a while.  My Sicilian side is from Pacino, diagonally southeast from Palermo on the very southern tip of Sicily.

10 hours ago, 27bored said:

I agree. I do think it's harder for producers to craft an entire persona for someone just by editing them a certain way than it is for them to portray certain situations in a certain light. It's like with this last fight between Sheila and Nate. We didn't see every second of the argument but I think we got the beats: Sheila got pissed off at something small; she did what she does, and said something that pissed off Nate; he responded how someone who's pissed off would respond; she got even more offended; he apologized; she left didn't forgive him, and left. Married at First Sight isn't the first reality show ever, and everything you ever see on TV has been edited to some extent, so whatever. I don't think we need to see the whole situation in real time in order to get the gist of what happened. There's little question that Sheila overreacted. I don't want to dump on her as though I'm a huge fan of Nate's -- because I agree with some posters that he does seem to know what to say in a slick kind of way -- but I'm an adult. I get that these are real people in a certain situation where they might be truncated and do versions of themselves.

In the beginning Sheila made it seem like she was rebelling against the show instigating her and Nate to have fights by trying to have discussions off camera, but as time went on the fights took on a life of their own culminating in this last episode with her storming out.  Now the fights seem very real and so out of control the producer probably had nothing to do with them and gone is the attempt to keep all their dirty laundry "off camera".

10 hours ago, 27bored said:

All that aside, speaking of Italian stereotypes, I have a few questions:

1. Is it true that Italian men have a reputation of being lazy?

2. Is Anthony Italian-American?

3. Does Anthony come off a tad lazy to anyone?

1.  Not that I have ever heard, and in my experience generally not any lazier than anyone else.

2.  Yes.

3.  It's hard to tell because they always film him just sitting somewhere talking which could give that impression.  I also notice he has a bit of a gut so I would speculate that he loves to eat and doesn't spend a lot of time in the gym.  He doesn't act like a lazy person IMO.

[Empress1]

Anthony doesn't strike me as lazy but he may be the sort of person who spends his down time more idly, you know? Like some people bike or do very active things on the weekends, but he prefers to hang out at home.

[gonecrackers]

They said he has a lot of ways he likes to spend his free time (as I recall Pepper mentioning). He doesn't look incredibly active, but that could be deceiving since he likes to eat as well LOL. He did want to do more than Ashley did on the honeymoon; she said he hung out at the bars & on the beach for her, mostly. She took him to the indoor skydiving as something more for him, to enjoy more activities with him, since he likes it. So I'd say he's probably not into running a 5K but he seems to enjoy lots of activities.

Edited July 17, 2017 by gonecrackers

[humbleopinion]

Sad I know this...

Anthony plays team soccer and refs soccer so he gets regular exercise.

Thinking he may be a stress eater and M@FS caused him to over indulge to self sooth.

We will see at the reunion show how the whole cast looks since filming, er... documenting....

[Snarklepuss]

5 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

Anthony doesn't strike me as lazy but he may be the sort of person who spends his down time more idly, you know? Like some people bike or do very active things on the weekends, but he prefers to hang out at home.

I thought he was the one that liked to do all these very physical recreational pursuits like jet skiing and zip lining and all this stuff they made an issue of during the honeymoon because Ashley is not so inclined and is doing things to please him.  I can't even remember the specific activities but if I didn't know about that I'd agree with you.  But here again it looks like the show is not presenting things 100% accurately.

Just now, humbleopinion said:

Thinking he may be a stress eater and M@FS caused him to over indulge to self sooth

Maybe it's all that cooking he's doing for Ashley since she doesn't cook and he likes doing it.  I know when I got married I put on a few pounds doing that.  In Italian American culture food = love and I was just showing my love a lot, LOL.  Eventually I stopped cooking all that fattening Italian food so much and I lost the weight!

[txhorns79]

When I see a couple like Cody and Danielle, I wonder what the contract they sign says about what happens if one of them ends things early by leaving or otherwise announcing that they've made a final decision weeks before the filming period us up.  Do they just lose the money they should be paid for that period?  Is there a penalty?    

[lh25]

18 hours ago, Drogo said:

when we all saw him playing with his phone instead. 

I thought he was looking something up for the application when I saw that, interesting thought.

[Empress1]

1 hour ago, txhorns79 said:

When I see a couple like Cody and Danielle, I wonder what the contract they sign says about what happens if one of them ends things early by leaving or otherwise announcing that they've made a final decision weeks before the filming period us up.  Do they just lose the money they should be paid for that period?  Is there a penalty?    

This happened last season - Heather ended the marriage after the honeymoon, so like two weeks in tops. They shoehorned them into the show separately because they were contractually obligated to film for those six weeks.

[txhorns79]

Quote

This happened last season - Heather ended the marriage after the honeymoon, so like two weeks in tops. They shoehorned them into the show separately because they were contractually obligated to film for those six weeks.

How interesting.  Did they try to make it seem like the couple would get back together, or did they just essentially admit that things were over and the whole thing was being done for time filling purposes?  I ask because I honestly don't understand why Cody and Danielle are still making noises like this all could suddenly work out.  Cody made a comment on Twitter about how he made a "commitment" before his friends, family and God," as a reason why he hasn't given up entirely, so maybe he's just really, really immature given the circumstances under which that "commitment" was made, but it's just sad to watch.     

Edited July 17, 2017 by txhorns79

[Empress1]

11 minutes ago, txhorns79 said:

How interesting.  Did they try to make it seem like the couple would get back together, or did they just essentially admit that things were over and the whole thing was being done for time filling purposes?  I ask because I honestly don't understand why Cody and Danielle are still making noises like this all could suddenly work out.  Cody made a comment on Twitter about how he made a "commitment" before his friends, family and God," as a reason why he hasn't given up entirely, so maybe he's just really, really immature given the circumstances under which that "commitment" was made, but it's just sad to watch.     

It was over. They didn't say it was for time-filling purposes, but it was obvious. They would have them do exercises like writing letters to the other person for closure and they would show them breaking the news to all their families and friends, but there was no illusion that they would reconcile. Heather was the one to end it and she was very clear that she was through. Derek didn't put up much of a fight, if I recall correctly. They'd been fighting all the way through the honeymoon, in part because Derek smoked weed every day (they didn't say "weed" on the show, they just said "smoking," which made Heather look kind of crazy - it was bullshit).

With Cody and Danielle, they just aren't a match; it's not as volatile as it was with Heather and Derek. Cody and Danielle haven't really fought; they're just not into each other.

[Evil Queen]

3 hours ago, txhorns79 said:

When I see a couple like Cody and Danielle, I wonder what the contract they sign says about what happens if one of them ends things early by leaving or otherwise announcing that they've made a final decision weeks before the filming period us up.  Do they just lose the money they should be paid for that period?  Is there a penalty?    

My understanding is that they are stuck until the end because the way the contract is. 

1 hour ago, Empress1 said:

It was over. They didn't say it was for time-filling purposes, but it was obvious. They would have them do exercises like writing letters to the other person for closure and they would show them breaking the news to all their families and friends, but there was no illusion that they would reconcile. Heather was the one to end it and she was very clear that she was through. Derek didn't put up much of a fight, if I recall correctly. They'd been fighting all the way through the honeymoon, in part because Derek smoked weed every day (they didn't say "weed" on the show, they just said "smoking," which made Heather look kind of crazy - it was bullshit).

With Cody and Danielle, they just aren't a match; it's not as volatile as it was with Heather and Derek. Cody and Danielle haven't really fought; they're just not into each other.

With the Heather/Derek situation I think the only reason she was able to end it and just film the stupid little snippets was because there was stuff that went down on that honeymoon the show didn't show us but either had on film or was witness to that they knew there was no going back for Heather. It wasn't just the pot smoking either. Since it was clear he had a temper on him. So MAFS probably was able get her to agree to finish the contract out by doing those stupid things and be done. The idiot "experts" tried to push her to try again at least a couple of times but she wasn't having it. Which they gave her the shit edit for sure with everything that happened. Which as you said Cody and Danielle aren't into each other and that is it. There isn't any knock out drag out fights. They are come off more like roommates and nothing more. Yet these couples are stuck with the show no matter what happens it seems like. 

[psychoticstate]

Good Lord, after the wonderful, trashy train wreck of MAFS2C, this is dull as dishwater.

I hope that Ashley's sister is putting on an act for the cameras or moving into her building is also b.s. for the show because otherwise . . . Ashley and Anthony will NEVER be left alone and will have NO privacy.   It seems that A&A have no real issues and so the show is having to create some, as they did last season with Lily and Tom.

If Sheila and Nate fight as often as they indicate, since so much is apparently not being caught on film, they are doomed.  I know it's been mentioned over and over and over again but in all the conversations was it stated that Sheila has never had an orgasm, period or never had an orgasm while having sex?  Because that's a huge difference.  If she's never had an orgasm at all, there is something going on that no amount of talking about "chocolate" or however good Nate may be is going to fix. 

Rachel needs to stop talking about chocolate.  And stop asking if the couples are in love.  It's been six weeks.  That's not a lot of time.  They are still getting to know each other.  Instead of focusing on being in love, maybe she should be having them focus on compatibility and give and take. 

Danielle and Cody are just painful.  I feel for him because it's clear the show wants to highlight the fact they aren't having sex every three minutes. Honestly, I don't think it's nearly as weird as the show would like us to believe. They were strangers when they married; having a ring on your finger isn't necessarily going to make you want to jump in bed with a stranger, even if you just married that person.  What is far more concerning to me is that they still seem so awkward around each other.  Cody's brother and Danielle's friend seem very comfortable around each other and they met on the same day - - and it's not because they are having sex. They are just easy going around each other whereas it seems like Danielle and Cody aren't communicating the same language.  At all. 

It's pretty obvious, and has been, that Danielle and Cody will not stay together.  A&A probably will.  Based on what we've seen, Nate and Sheila should not.  Way too many fights and too much "I don't want to be with you/married to you" for only six weeks in.

[Meowwww]

9 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

I thought he was the one that liked to do all these very physical recreational pursuits like jet skiing and zip lining and all this stuff they made an issue of during the honeymoon because Ashley is not so inclined and is doing things to please him.  I can't even remember the specific activities but if I didn't know about that I'd agree with you.  But here again it looks like the show is not presenting things 100% accurately.

 

That was Nate.  Sheila wanted to lay on the beach and he wanted to jet ski and hike and go go go. 

[roseslg]

31 minutes ago, Meowwww said:

That was Nate.  Sheila wanted to lay on the beach and he wanted to jet ski and hike and go go go. 

That was actually Anthony.  He wanted to kayak, windsurf, etc.   Ashley was afraid of sharks in the water and wanted to lounge and drink.

[27bored]

I don't know. I get a slightly lazy vibe from Anthony. Not super lazy or trifling, but maybe a little acquiescent. Anthony doesn't strike me as the type of guy who looks for shit to do. It might have something to do with the fact that we mainly see him sitting around, cuddling with Ashley, and eating. Plus, he's a little doughy and we don't see a ton of working out from him. But it's probably just a coincidence.

I did a Google search for Italian stereotypes and found several sites that mention laziness. Stereotypes don't mean you're apart of a bad group of people, just certain traits are more prevalent than in society writ-large. And my thing is, I never have a problem with citing a stereotype if the people being stereotyped cop to it. It's kind of like the idea of a loud Italian family. Plenty of Italian-Americans will admit to having a loud family. There are plenty of non-Italian families who are loud, too, I'll bet. But it doesn't make the stereotype less true. 

I think some of the lazy Italian thing comes from the idea that mothers spoil their sons to where the son can be a little too laid-back about stuff because he expects the woman/somebody else to handle it. 

The thing is, though, I think he's really into Ashley, so he might have a little more get-up-and-go with her, at least for awhile. Sometimes laziness is really just people shutting down because they don't want to deal with their significant other and/or other people. So instead they just melt into the couch.

[jpagan05]

On 7/16/2017 at 11:19 AM, Drogo said:

Anthony seemed pretty lazy about filing out that one page credit application for the apartment. Also pretty ballsy of him to get mad at Ashley as if she was interrupting his filling it out, when we all saw him playing with his phone instead. 

 

On 7/16/2017 at 11:46 AM, humbleopinion said:

I'm attributing Anthony's snappish behavior to the long day of "documenting" their indoors skydiving date through to the evening.

We've all been there...doing a tedious task like paperwork, hungry and if someone looks at you sideways you get snippy and quick tempered.

Anthony have a Snickers....
 

I thought his assyness was a bit of projecting because he doesn't want to live in his sis-in-law's building. I don't blame him. Is that really the only suitable place they could find in all of Chicago? 

[jpagan05]

12 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

Maybe it's all that cooking he's doing for Ashley since she doesn't cook and he likes doing it.  I know when I got married I put on a few pounds doing that.  In Italian American culture food = love and I was just showing my love a lot, LOL.  Eventually I stopped cooking all that fattening Italian food so much and I lost the weight!

Does it bother anyone else that Anthony serves his pasta naked with the sauce/gravy on the side rather than incorporating the pasta into it? Even as an Irish/Icelandic girl, I know that is wrong.

[Snarklepuss]

13 hours ago, Evil Queen said:

My understanding is that they are stuck until the end because the way the contract is. 

With the Heather/Derek situation I think the only reason she was able to end it and just film the stupid little snippets was because there was stuff that went down on that honeymoon the show didn't show us but either had on film or was witness to that they knew there was no going back for Heather. It wasn't just the pot smoking either. Since it was clear he had a temper on him. So MAFS probably was able get her to agree to finish the contract out by doing those stupid things and be done. The idiot "experts" tried to push her to try again at least a couple of times but she wasn't having it. Which they gave her the shit edit for sure with everything that happened. Which as you said Cody and Danielle aren't into each other and that is it. There isn't any knock out drag out fights. They are come off more like roommates and nothing more. Yet these couples are stuck with the show no matter what happens it seems like. 

I personally think Heather had enough on Derek to threaten a lawsuit or other damaging actions with the producers so they let her out of her contract quickly without a fight and that's why she is the only one to have left the show so early.  I would believe that otherwise they are bound by contract to stick with it and "honor their commitment" until the 8 weeks are up.  We'll never know exactly what she had on Derek, but knowing he was into weed he may have been into other illegal substances and she could have threatened to go public about them setting her up with a drug addict.  They wouldn't want that kind of press.

N.B. - Yes I know that weed isn't necessarily a sign of harder drug use, but in Derek's case it might have been!
 

6 hours ago, 27bored said:

I did a Google search for Italian stereotypes and found several sites that mention laziness. Stereotypes don't mean you're apart of a bad group of people, just certain traits are more prevalent than in society writ-large. And my thing is, I never have a problem with citing a stereotype if the people being stereotyped cop to it. It's kind of like the idea of a loud Italian family. Plenty of Italian-Americans will admit to having a loud family. There are plenty of non-Italian families who are loud, too, I'll bet. But it doesn't make the stereotype less true. 

I think some of the lazy Italian thing comes from the idea that mothers spoil their sons to where the son can be a little too laid-back about stuff because he expects the woman/somebody else to handle it.

I'll cop to the "loud Italian family" thing because that was definitely true in my case and I've heard people mention that a lot over the course of my lifetime on TV and among friends, but I've honestly never heard of the "lazy" stereotype until reading this thread!  Plus it doesn't apply to my family at all as all the men were pretty much all driven achievers and workaholics.  My grandfather started and ran his own construction business in Montreal and even though my uncle was legally blind (he had sight in only one eye) he became a merchant seaman and traveled the world.  I have a 1st cousin once removed that's a flight attendant on a Canadian airline.  Another one owns and runs a door installation company.  Definitely not laid back stuff and no mama's boys that I know of!

That said, I can actually see that stereotype being true of some Italian American men, but I can't say I identify with it since it doesn't apply to my own family.  And yeah, Anthony does give off that kind of vibe, but I personally see that in a lot in American men of his generation of all nationalities.  My husband's nephews are around Anthony's age and both of them are like that too because their mother's spoiled them to the point that they can't really be adults.  Same is true of the son of a high school friend.  And they're not at all of Italian descent!
 

5 hours ago, jpagan05 said:

Does it bother anyone else that Anthony serves his pasta naked with the sauce/gravy on the side rather than incorporating the pasta into it? Even as an Irish/Icelandic girl, I know that is wrong.

It's only wrong because the Italian food snobs want us to think it's wrong.  Like putting grated cheese on linguine with clam sauce.  Sure, they don't tend to do that in Italy but here in the U.S. we do a lot of things they don't do over there and it has always been that way.  Even 60-70 years ago my grandmother made spaghetti and meatballs and that was never a dish that was native to Italy.  And we always put cheese on linguine with clam sauce.  And yeah, on occasion we just dump the red sauce on the pasta separately and don't mix it in first.  It's really a matter of personal preference.  There really are no rules with stuff like that.  This is down home cooking, not fussy French haute cuisine with a lot of rules.

In that vein, you HAVE to watch this short video of Nick Stellino on this very subject.  Nick is a Sicilian born American chef that has a show on PBS:

Edited July 18, 2017 by Snarklepuss

[lh25]

11 hours ago, jpagan05 said:

Does it bother anyone else that Anthony serves his pasta naked with the sauce/gravy on the side rather than incorporating the pasta into it? Even as an Irish/Icelandic girl, I know that is wrong.

We do that at home, but we aren't Italian.  It's because hubby likes more sauce then I do.

[ethalfrida]

I can truly say I have never heard that Italian men were lazy.

[gonecrackers]

Yeah, I was thinking the sauce being separate thing was so everyone could have it to their taste, which is actually quite considerate of him.

I don't find Anthony to be lazy, & have been pretty impressed with his emotional intelligence so far. I also don't see a controlling streak in him, as I have definitely seen with Italian men (although may not be all of them, just my experience). The Italian men I've experienced have all been hard workers, but not too high of an emotional IQ, which is probably why I've noticed that in Anthony.

I get annoyed with some stereotypes but that's probably because my experience has not fit them mostly.

[Snarklepuss]

2 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

Yeah, I was thinking the sauce being separate thing was so everyone could have it to their taste, which is actually quite considerate of him.

I don't find Anthony to be lazy, & have been pretty impressed with his emotional intelligence so far. I also don't see a controlling streak in him, as I have definitely seen with Italian men (although may not be all of them, just my experience). The Italian men I've experienced have all been hard workers, but not too high of an emotional IQ, which is probably why I've noticed that in Anthony.

I get annoyed with some stereotypes but that's probably because my experience has not fit them mostly.

I hear you, Gone, I have seen that controlling streak in Italian American men too, which is probably one big reason I didn't marry one (and neither did my mother, ha!).  Also, I was raised a Protestant while most Italian Americans are Roman Catholic so my outlook on things didn't mesh so well with theirs.  And a big "me too" about my experience not fitting stereotypes, mostly.  That said, I think Ashley and Anthony are on the same level culturally speaking.  They seem to "get" each other very well that way, so I have to say that at the very least, the show got that part of their match right.

[princelina]

12 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

I personally think Heather had enough on Derek to threaten a lawsuit or other damaging actions with the producers so they let her out of her contract quickly without a fight and that's why she is the only one to have left the show so early.  I would believe that otherwise they are bound by contract to stick with it and "honor their commitment" until the 8 weeks are up.  We'll never know exactly what she had on Derek, but knowing he was into weed he may have been into other illegal substances and she could have threatened to go public about them setting her up with a drug addict.  They wouldn't want that kind of press.

That makes sense to me!  Because I was thinking about that horrible barf bag Sean, who obviously didn't live with Davina, although he claimed work/distance problems.  And we found out after the show that Basement wasn't living with Jaclyn either, right?  And even had another girlfriend?  And at some point people weren't believing that Stashley lived with David also.  But we were all supposed to believe that they did!

[humbleopinion]

No one believes Danielle has been sharing a bed with Cody since a week or two after the honeymoon...

Can you imagine the whimpering and whining she put up with Cody wanting sex, complaining of blue nugglets, as she tries to sleep...gahhhhh

 

Homie: What do you think of new dad?

Dude: He whines worse than Fifi, the  poodle that lives next door.

Homie: He does love to take us on walks and gives long belly rubs.

Dude: I think his hands linger a split second too long....he must be lonely

Homie: Wanna Bark?

Dude: You never have to ask...

RUFF,RUFF, ARF, ARF,BOW WOW, YIP, YIP, YOWL.......

[Evil Queen]

18 hours ago, jpagan05 said:

Does it bother anyone else that Anthony serves his pasta naked with the sauce/gravy on the side rather than incorporating the pasta into it? Even as an Irish/Icelandic girl, I know that is wrong.

We keep it separate because I don't make the same sauce for myself as I do my husband. Then I have 2 kids that either just use cheese on the pasta or eat it plain. The other goes back and forth on what he likes. So there is no mixing it up like that here. Always on the side.

13 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

I personally think Heather had enough on Derek to threaten a lawsuit or other damaging actions with the producers so they let her out of her contract quickly without a fight and that's why she is the only one to have left the show so early.  I would believe that otherwise they are bound by contract to stick with it and "honor their commitment" until the 8 weeks are up.  We'll never know exactly what she had on Derek, but knowing he was into weed he may have been into other illegal substances and she could have threatened to go public about them setting her up with a drug addict.  They wouldn't want that kind of press.

N.B. - Yes I know that weed isn't necessarily

She didn't get out of her contract though. If she had she wouldn't have had to do all those stupid snippets with lettering writing, talking to her friend, THs or meeting with him one last time or so bs. She still had to do something to finish out the contract but I think it was one of those things that they came to some sort of terms with to finish it out. So then there would be no lawsuit on either side, kwim? I think this show would got for a lawsuit or pay them pony up if they don't fulfill their side of things...even if its alone with the crew like most of Heather's and Derek's were. There was totally more to it then what we had seen for her to be able to get out of it as much as she had. I wouldn't be surprised if there was more either than weed and the temper....which even his ex he meet with basically outed that issue. 

6 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

Yeah, I was thinking the sauce being separate thing was so everyone could have it to their taste, which is actually quite considerate of him.

I don't find Anthony to be lazy, & have been pretty impressed with his emotional intelligence so far. I also don't see a controlling streak in him, as I have definitely seen with Italian men (although may not be all of them, just my experience). The Italian men I've experienced have all been hard workers, but not too high of an emotional IQ, which is probably why I've noticed that in Anthony.

I get annoyed with some stereotypes but that's probably because my experience has not fit them mostly.

Agree, I don't see him as lazy. Especially considering he likes to do things. The problem is the show isn't going to show us everything that goes on so it looks like they are just sitting around most the time. IMO there will be lazy people from all races and ethnicity and ones that are hard workers. 

[Snarklepuss]

7 hours ago, Evil Queen said:

She didn't get out of her contract though. If she had she wouldn't have had to do all those stupid snippets with lettering writing, talking to her friend, THs or meeting with him one last time or so bs. She still had to do something to finish out the contract but I think it was one of those things that they came to some sort of terms with to finish it out. So then there would be no lawsuit on either side, kwim? I think this show would got for a lawsuit or pay them pony up if they don't fulfill their side of things...even if its alone with the crew like most of Heather's and Derek's were. There was totally more to it then what we had seen for her to be able to get out of it as much as she had. I wouldn't be surprised if there was more either than weed and the temper....which even his ex he meet with basically outed that issue.

She may have made some concessions in exchange for being let out of the contract early, and until then continued playing along with them.  What we saw of her afterward could have been filmed in one or two days.  It wouldn't have been in her best interest to totally alienate them so she would likely have done those things to be let off the hook early without a fuss.  This from the mouth of the lawyer in my life.  I know all her talking heads were done in one shot because of her wardrobe and the lighting, etc., which never changed.

[Lusterleaf]

What a boring episode, I found myself fast forwarding a lot through it. Same S*** different week.

[stuckin60s]

Sheila made a comment that she needed someone who would love her when she was most unloveable ( something like that)  Obviously she has issues way beyond Nate.  She looks for reasons to be the one to leave and not be left behind.  I think counseling and then "maybe' Nate is her best shot at happiness

[princelina]

So I finally got around to watching this - I am Team Nate.  And if I were him I would now be "done".

[bichonblitz]

On 7/16/2017 at 2:17 AM, 27bored said:

Sheila isn't getting a bad edit; she's just a transforming ass bitch. She's cool when it's cool, but as soon as Megatron and the other Decepticons decide they're going to save Cybertron by merging it with Earth's life force or whatever, she goes from Chrysler 300 to an Autobot really to roll the fuck out. I don't think they can consistently edit someone to look the exact opposite than they are. I think Cody, for example, is getting an edit of sorts because they keep showing clip after clip of him talking about not having sex, when I'm sure he's just answering questions he's been given. It's similar to a few years back when they had a straight guy on Project Runway and it seemed like every POV he gave he was mentioning that he's a straight guy. It made him look like he was obsessed with it, but really the producers kept pressing the issue. That's not Sheila's testimony. 

I don't care what Nate said, to be perfectly honest. Number one, it seems like Sheila was gangbanging on bacon. He was playing a game on his phone, said he'd hit her back in a sec, and she got in her feelings about it. So the fact that this was an issue that she even had to address already meant she was on one. Second, Sheila, if you're so "vicious" and quick to pop off, bitch don't get mad when Nate, or anybody else for that matter, decides to clap back on your ass. Shit. That's why I hate when women claim they're so incisive with their words. No, you're really not. You're not about that life at all, so stop it. Nate probably didn't even say anything crazy at her, and by crazy, I mean unfair. Because if he said how she acts probably contributed to whatever problems she had in her previous relationship, that might sting but it's probably true. Or, if he went harder and said, "I see why you got cheated on...because you're suspicious of everything", still harsh, but true. But Sheila, you called the man a bitch. You...know better than that, that's why you said that shit. If he had said that to her, everybody in the whole wide world would think he was an asshole. But my thing is, Sheila? When it comes to throwing "bitch" around, it takes one to know one, boo.

I thought Nate was trying to be the bigger person and apologize, but seriously, I wouldn't waste my time apologizing to her. He might have gone too far, but Sheila doesn't really understand how her behavior affects other people. She knows she goes in when she gets angry, but you see how she deals with that anger being given back. She fucking bails on the situation. Like I said last week, and I hadn't even seen this episode the night it came on, when women are like Sheila and quick to read you over something, trust me, they are not fucking with you. Look at Sheila. Changing her name and shit. Talking about how great Nate is. But then the second her feelings get hurt, she's ready to pack up all her shit and leave, then even when he apologizes profusely, she's done Done DONE! She's not a loyal chick and she's not over her ex. Let her be a big baby and throw away the relationship and go back out there to fall in love with another dude who is going to have to tip toe around her sensitive ass. Cut your losses and run!

 

Anthony and Ashley still seem to be good for the most part. I think Ashley's probably a little bit of a pain, but I think they're in the Honeymoon phase where there's sex all the time and everything is mostly alright. When they settle into a groove, her neurotic tendencies are going to become more of a pain, I think. And let me just say this to the ladies about men who procrastinate. It may sound counterintuitive, but sometimes we prefer if you wait until the "last minute" or until it's urgent before you ask us to do something. If you bring it up days or weeks prior, it's probably going to get filed away, so to speak. In the situation with the apartment form, that didn't seem like something that would take very long. It might seem prudent to be like, "just do it and get it out of the way", but if it's not a big deal and it's not something we necessarily want to do, you might have better luck mentioning it to us that morning or the night before it's due. That way we can make it a priority and know that when we complete it, it's done and over with. But many of us don't do the whole "if someone says be there at 9, I'll be there at 8:45, like a good soldier" thing. If something is going to take 30 minutes, we don't really need a five day notice. Jus' sayin'.

 

Danielle trips me out because she always seems mildly taken aback when Cody exposes that, you know, he ain't feeling the love. When he said his trust for her is 3-4, so was confused. Huh? I think Cody was right when he said he has stronger feelings for her than she does for him. She looked confused by that too. Either Danielle thinks Cody is kind of a doofus -- which he may be -- or she thinks she's feigning a burgeoning interest in him really well -- which she's absolutely not. I think Cody's probably bringing up the lack of sex more because it's getting close to decision time and Danielle has safely made it all the way to the end while barely giving Cody any reason to think she even likes him, much less wants to stay married to him. I really hope Cody leaves Danielle alone, focuses on his gym, and maybe tries to meet a girl around his age the normal way. Let Danielle go Facestalk her ex or something. I get the feeling Danielle's probably a big fat zero in bed. And Cody needs to stop simping and acting like she's so wonderful because no she's not. She's probably not a bad person deep down, but she is leading him on and seems to be not over her ex.

Perfect Post! Every. Word. 

[Jellybeans]

24 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

Perfect Post! Every. Word. 

Agreed.  Wanted to like it twice so I did this instead lol.  

My s/o has been watching with me.  He thinks Danielle and Cody will surprise us.

I disagree, fyi. 

[Gem 10]

On July 16, 2017 at 10:10 AM, Braveshoppr said:

Please don't start with the black vs white routine. This is a forum, a place where people can express their opinions without fear of overture. It's perfectly just for the poster to do so. She has made her point -the same point one can find all over the net. Most people (of any persuasion) feel like Sheila has a few loose nuts, she's damaging and disparaging of Nate. If you are so offended by a panelist's opinion, one that is shared by most people you, have your work cut out for you. Go to Lifetime and complain on their forum and take notice where it gets you. 

"I just get sick of black women being demonized. " Sheila is creating her own video, no one here is telling her how to act or what to say.  We are commenting on what we see. This is not the place to strong-arm other posters because he or she doesn't see it the you want them to.

Yes!  Was thinking the same thing, and couldn't have said it better!  It's been getting ridiculous.

[Gem 10]

On July 16, 2017 at 1:25 PM, Snarklepuss said:

It's even worse because my mother's family is Sicilian.  I couldn't tell anyone that growing up or I would get asked if I had relatives in the Mafia.  Even the black kids would ask me that!  My husband has a cousin that's part Italian (Neapolitan) and he has a deep prejudice towards Sicilians.  I couldn't believe the way he treated me at a family wedding a few years ago.  He acted like I was the scum of the earth for being Sicilian!  So anyone can be guilty of racial or ethnic prejudice based on stereotypes.

Everyone loved the Sopranos, including my husband.  He didn't understand why I was never 100% comfortable with the show.  I asked him how he would feel if a show came on the air that popularized the negative stereotype of Irish Americans as lazy, dumb drunks.  He still doesn't get it, maybe because he never experienced that kind of prejudice since that stereotype of the Irish disappeared a long time ago.

P.S.  Most Sicilians that came to the US did so to get away from the Mafia.

I would hope that people realize it was the Irish, Polish and Italians who came to this country penniless and built the roads, bridges, tunnels, railroads, etc. and made New York City and other parts of this country great.  They took the right route .. Some others took the easy wrong route.

[LennieBriscoe]

Now I want linguine with clam sauce.

[Snarklepuss]

5 minutes ago, LennieBriscoe said:

Now I want linguine with clam sauce.

Of course now that you mentioned it, me too.  With grated cheese on it, ha!

[KateHearts]

On 7/14/2017 at 10:23 AM, Braveshoppr said:

Didn't they have a moment when Nate kept apologizing over and over and Sheila didn't accept his apology each and/or any time. She became angrier every time he apologized! His look was incredulous. 

Yes, he apologized and she said "WORDS MEAN NOTHING!" She said something about actions - however, it's hard for him to show her he's sorry and he cares when she up and moves out after a fight. I agree with others who say she needs some therapy.  Yes, he hit below the belt. But I would venture to say that most people have made that mistake at least once.  She has gone from "we're in love; this is exactly what I want in a mate," to "I'm DONE!" (4th time) in just 38 minutes of taping.  She is exhausting.  Nate, if he sticks it out, will be perpetually walking on eggshells wondering what will set her off next.  The producer-driven "only one key" thing was ridiculous.  How hard is it to make a damn copy?  As for his deferring her call- Imagine if he had just ignored it; at least he texted to tell her he'd call her back.  She is very into "disrespect," which for her could mean something as little as leaving the toilet seat up.

I am furious that the "experts" continue to maintain that it is all Danielle's FAULT that poor Cody is suffering from blue balls and "can't hold out much longer," in his words.  First of all, no one should be obligated in any way to have sex with someone after a certain period of time.  If she's not into it, she's not.  She tried- early on, and he rebuffed her advances.  He's immature, unattractive, and whiny.  She just doesn't want to come right out and say she's not attracted to him, although he's a nice guy.  She's biding time until the show ends.  So we are subjected to the nonsense talk of "we're making a connection; we're workin' on it; we're hopin' to ignite the spark," blah, blah, blah.  The self-gratification fake scene was a pathetic revelation of how repugnant these producers are to go there- and how little self-respect Cody has to go along (as well as allowing himself to be portrayed as a sniveling, wimpy, weak man).

Anthony and Ashley- meh.  I think they'll stay together (they have pretty much indicated that, with the apartment search comments).  Ashley showed her immaturity with the scene of flouncing into the bedroom, ignoring his questions, saying she'd "just order for herself," and needing him to come and stroke her leg to get over the whole non-thing.  

[gonecrackers]

Ashley just has to give Anthony a break on the multitasking- next time spell it out for him. 'Let's take a 5m break to order food... okay now back to the application; I'll get the door when the food comes'.

Peace & food for both.

[Jellybeans]

Sheila...so words mean nothing and a $5 plant means everything?

[jpagan05]

On 7/17/2017 at 9:26 PM, Snarklepuss said:

It's only wrong because the Italian food snobs want us to think it's wrong.  Like putting grated cheese on linguine with clam sauce.  Sure, they don't tend to do that in Italy but here in the U.S. we do a lot of things they don't do over there and it has always been that way.  Even 60-70 years ago my grandmother made spaghetti and meatballs and that was never a dish that was native to Italy.  And we always put cheese on linguine with clam sauce.  And yeah, on occasion we just dump the red sauce on the pasta separately and don't mix it in first.  It's really a matter of personal preference.  There really are no rules with stuff like that.  This is down home cooking, not fussy French haute cuisine with a lot of rules.

In that vein, you HAVE to watch this short video of Nick Stellino on this very subject.  Nick is a Sicilian born American chef that has a show on PBS:

Love it! I'm an offender of parmesan cheese with seafood. 

[Passthepopcorn]

Sheila has unfinished business with her ex and the abuse she took from him. She is taking it on Nate. Pure and simple. 

Nate turned out to be a pretty decent 25 year old after all.