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The Lexicon


only1kcm
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I have to share this. I was getting new tires today, so I was waiting for my car to be finished. There was a lady talking loudly on her cell phone. She also had two kids who were screaming and running all over the place - big surprise. Anyway, she was complaining about something the tire guys did. And she said, "They had tooken them off, and they were all messed up."

 

That, my friends, is the first time I've ever heard anyone say "tooken" outside of a TV court show.

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My soul hurts.

 

I'm a special education teacher.  I have a 3rd grade student (that I got when he was in 1st grade) whose only real disability is that he's an only child being raised by grandparents who think he shits glitter and rainbows.  He's constantly saying things like "I goed to the store." and "We runned on the playground."  I spent the first two years modeling and correcting.  Now I act like I can't understand what he's saying and he manages to figure out the proper way to say it.  Aforementioned grandparents think this is oh so adorable (and it probably was when he was 4) that I'm fighting an uphill battle. 

 

I'm wondering if I'll see him/them on JJ someday.

Edited by DebbieW
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I think it was 2 weeks ago on a repeat, someone used the term "escape goat" during the halterview. As in "she wanted an escape goat". 

Om my god.  I'm sorry but this is hilarious.  Reminds me of that friends episode where Joey thought the term "Moot point" was "Moo point" as in "moo" the sound a cow makes so the point is irrelevant.

Edited by JBC344
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I teach 3rd grade students with learning disabilities and one of my boys does this because he's sounding out the words.  It's adorable when he does it (although we're working on not doing it).  These dumbasses, not so much.

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A new definition for "escape goat". Used in Kitten Mom v. Kitten Mom, plaintiff sues defendant for vet bills she accrued while caring for a stray cat. Defendant claims Plaintiff stole the cat and countersued for lost wages. JJ established that Plaintiff was a better Kitten mom getting shots for kitten, getting kitten's claws trimmed monthly, etc. than Defendant, but the Kitten was the Defendant's pet. JJ found for the Plaintiff. During Plaintiff's testimony, she said the kitten was an "escape goat" and left the home while a door was open.

 

Escape Goat

1. noun: a scapegoat; a person or thing that is made to bear the blame of others.

2. noun: a escape artist; a prison inmate with the reputation of being able to take unauthorized leave.

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I mentioned this on the main JJ page. This is not the first occurrence of 'escape goat' on JJ

 

In the older case I believe the litigant said 'escape goat' in the true sense of being a scape goat but just not knowing what the correct word was- she knew the meaning but not the words. 

The kitten litigant was wrong in every sense. 

 

And this reminds me of daffy duck teachers where one of them used the 'allowed speaker' to call out the other.  Why did she do that?  Obviously because it was allowed.

 

It boggles when teachers don't know their own language.

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I heard this on a repeat case: Drunken mom suing drunken daughter for fishing poles and other assorted property left at drunken daughter's home after drunken Mom was thrown out. Drunken daughter countersued for damages caused by drunken mom's sober chihuahuas. Drunken daughter asked drunken mom to move in to watch her children. But threw mom out after discussing mom's flirtatious behavior towards daughter's boyfriend. the discussion took place at a bar.

 

"uncomfortabilize" verb. to make uncomfortable

 

Usage: "She uncomfortabilized me because she was always touching me and coming onto me".

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I've been noticing that people are forgetting comparative adjectives and how to use them:  old, older, oldest; short, shorter, shortest; late, later, latest.  I recently heard someone on this show say, "more big" rather than "bigger."  Can't remember the case or the contestant.

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I've been noticing that people are forgetting comparative adjectives and how to use them:

What I keep seeing is the inability to use the most basic tenses - present, future, past. This is not getting into some of the oddball tenses in English, but these people can' even handle the basic three tenses. They are functionally illiterate in simple basic English but have a huge sense of entitlement.

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I myself never walk anymore. I never do anything. I only proceed to the store or proceed to call on the phone. I find it carries more weight.

"Your Honor, I then proceeded to my vee-hickle which was currently parked-ed outside the bar."

Edited by Intocats
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Today's "use of a real word incorrectly" award goes to the fella who hauls "garbage, trash, refuge". Extra points for (attempted) redundancy!

He was successfully redundant as soon as he followed garbage with trash. 

 

He was looking for refuge after he hit and run. Maybe refuge was a Freudian slip,    

 

You know a Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.

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 Have you heard some verbal words that left you scratching your head? Look them up here and add your own!

 

Because the English language is flexible and ever-changing, particularly in trailer parks…

Brought to you by the makers of the Judge Judy Drinking Game.

 

Created by someone on TwoP whose name eludes me again. Additions by me. I'm sorry but I cannot remember names. Ever.
 

Abruised: adjective; bruised during the course of physical abuse. "My baby daddy beat on me and now I'm abruised."

A'ight: adjective; doing well, okay. "I do a little of this and that and I do a'ight, your honah."

Argacity: noun; The quality of being audacious. "My roommate had the argacity to sleep with my baby daddy so I bleached her clothes."

Axe: verb; Request. "He axed me to bail him out of jail."

Baby Daddy: noun; a man who randomly fathers children but does not support them. "I don't get no child support from my baby daddy."

Beaucoodles: adj, Fr; A semi-French version of many; multiples. "See? I have beaucoodles of emails that troll sent me!"

Bickerment: verb; to have a disagreement. "We just had a bickerment over the rent payment, your honor."

Bicker-backer: verb; to bicker back and forth. "We continued to bicker-backer until she finally got me the cell phone."

Blogus: adjective; Not genuine. Fake. "Her claims that I injured her are blogus."

Borrow: verb; to have loaned someone something. "I was broke, so she borrowed me $200 to pay my bail."

Boughten: verb; to have purchased something. "He boughten me the engagement ring, so it's mine to keep!"

Broughten: verb; past participle of bring. "I had broughten the ring to the pawn shop."

Coercion: noun; A request to pay back money you were loaned. 

Confruntated: verb; as in "I don't put up with being confruntated'" (confronted, if you couldn't tell by the context).

Conversate: verb; to have a conversation. "After we conversated, she finally got me a cell phone".

Despairing: transitive verb; to speak slightingly about. "I never made no despairing remarks about my ex."

Disregard: transitive verb; To dispose of or discard. "The cell phone was busted so I disregarded it."

Entitle: transitive verb; Obligated. "I didn't feel entitled to pay the child support, your honor."

Exhilarator: noun; A control on a car used to increase speed. "He punched me and I accidentally hit the exhilarator instead of the brake."

Explicited: adj; risque. "He posted those explicited photos of me on his MySpace page."

Exuberant: adj; Large amount. "He axed me to co-sign for his car since he knew I had an exhuberant amount of credit."

Fraudulate: verb; to commit a fraud, to cheat someone. "He fraudulated me out of my money!"

Furiation: adj; to be mad. "When I realized my boyfriend would never pay back the money, I had a furiation."

Furnitured: adj; when an apartment or home is furnished. "He told me the place was furnitured!"

Gaven: verb; to have given. "She had gaven me the credit card."

Had went: verb; Went. "Me and him had went to the pawn shop so I could get back my ring that I previously pawnded."

Hurted: transitional verb(?); Was painful. "She bit my pinky off during the physical altercation and it really hurted."

Insignificant other: noun; a domestic partner; someone with whom a person has a romantic relationship. "I was presently staying with my insignificant other at that time." 

Like-ded: verb; Was fond of. "I bought that $300 cellphone with my SSI because I like-ded it."

Making amendments: verb; to make up; bury the hatchet. "They used to argue some but then they made amendments and were getting along okay."

Non-transfundable: noun; A purchase that can be neither transferred to another party nor refunded. "Them airline tickets was non-transfundable!"

Numerous of times. adj; phrase Many. "He called me numerous of times and harassed me."

Noyum: Adj; A smooth floor covering used esp. in kitchens and bathrooms. "He threw a lamp at my head and it fell and ripped the noyum."

Over-tempered: adjective; Very angry. "I beat her up in the parking lot cause she had a frickin' nerve sleeping with my boyfriend and I got over-tempered."

Pacific: adjective; Particular. "Your honor, he said he wanted that pacific cell phone."

Pawnded: verb, past tense; when one has pawned an item. After I pawnded the engagement ring, I paid my rent.

Physical Altercation: noun; Skanks beating the crap out of each other over a worthless man. "We had a physical altercation and she bust me in my lip." (A phrase pronounced correctly but that has only one meaning on JJ so I included it.)

Presently: adverb; in the past. "I was presently being evicted at that time."

Repeative: adj; recurrent. "Her boyfriend is a repeative customer."

Revengual: adj; to take revenge. "After we had splitten up, he took revengual on me and keyed my car."

Revengeful: adj, variant of revengual. "She only keyed my car because she was revengeful."

Seen: verb, past tense; to have seen. "I seen my boyfriend out with her, so I keyed his car."

Spendy: noun; expensive. "He axed me to buy him a new cell phone and it was spendy."

Splitten: adj; when a couple has broken up. After we had splitten up, he still owed me for rent.

Stolded: verb; past participle of steal. "I don't have it no more cuz my brudder stolded it."

Supposably: adverb; purportedly. "Supposably he paid the cell phone bill with the money I borrowed him."

Squashed their beef: Verb; Resolved an argument. "Him and me squashed our beef over me totaling his car."

Texes: noun; More than one text. "He sent me them explicited texes!"

Tooken: verb, past tense; to have taken. I woke up to see he had tooken the keys and trashed my car.

Verbal words: noun; argument. "Him and me had verbal words."

Verbital agreement: noun; oral contract. "Her and me had a verbital agreement."

Vindiction: noun; syn. anger "She left me so I went over and shot her dog out of pure vindiction."

Honorable Mention:

RIGORMORTIS STEW: noun; A meal consisting of non-fresh roadkill, prepared by "Deliverance" cast clones. "I never et none of that rigormortis stew!"

Edited by AngelaHunter
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 Have you heard some verbal words that left you scratching your head? Look them up here and add your own!

 

Because the English language is flexible and ever-changing, particularly in trailer parks…

Brought to you by the makers of the Judge Judy Drinking Game.

 

Created by someone on TwoP whose name eludes me again. Additions by me. I'm sorry but I cannot remember names. Ever.

 

Abruised: adjective; bruised during the course of physical abuse. "My baby daddy beat on me and now I'm abruised."

A'ight: adjective; doing well, okay. "I do a little of this and that and I do a'ight, your honah."

Argacity: noun; The quality of being audacious. "My roommate had the argacity to sleep with my baby daddy so I bleached her clothes."

Axe: verb; Request. "He axed me to bail him out of jail."

Baby Daddy: noun; a man who randomly fathers children but does not support them. "I don't get no child support from my baby daddy."

Beaucoodles: adj, Fr; A semi-French version of many; multiples. "See? I have beaucoodles of emails that troll sent me!"

Bickerment: verb; to have a disagreement. "We just had a bickerment over the rent payment, your honor."

Bicker-backer: verb; to bicker back and forth. "We continued to bicker-backer until she finally got me the cell phone."

Blogus: adjective; Not genuine. Fake. "Her claims that I injured her are blogus."

Borrow: verb; to have loaned someone something. "I was broke, so she borrowed me $200 to pay my bail."

Boughten: verb; to have purchased something. "He boughten me the engagement ring, so it's mine to keep!"

Coercion: noun; A request to pay back money you were loaned. 

Confruntated: verb; as in "I don't put up with being confruntated'" (confronted, if you couldn't tell by the context).

Conversate: verb; to have a conversation. "After we conversated, she finally got me a cell phone".

Despairing: transitive verb; to speak slightingly about. "I never made no despairing remarks about my ex."

Disregard: transitive verb; To dispose of or discard. "The cell phone was busted so I disregarded it."

Entitle: transitive verb; Obligated. "I didn't feel entitled to pay the child support, your honor."

Exhilarator: noun; A control on a car used to increase speed. "He punched me and I accidentally hit the exhilarator instead of the brake."

Explicited: adj; risque. "He posted those explicited photos of me on his MySpace page."

Exuberant: adj; Large amount. "He axed me to co-sign for his car since he knew I had an exhuberant amount of credit."

Fraudulate: verb; to commit a fraud, to cheat someone. "He fraudulated me out of my money!"

Furiation: adj; to be mad. "When I realized my boyfriend would never pay back the money, I had a furiation."

Furnitured: adj; when an apartment or home is furnished. "He told me the place was furnitured!"

Gaven: verb; to have given. "She had gaven me the credit card."

Had went: verb; Went. "Me and him had went to the pawn shop so I could get back my ring that I previously pawnded."

Hurted: transitional verb(?); Was painful. "She bit my pinky off during the physical altercation and it really hurted."

Like-ded: verb; Was fond of. "I bought that $300 cellphone with my SSI because I like-ded it."

Making amendments: verb; to make up; bury the hatchet. "They used to argue some but then they made amendments and were getting along okay."

Non-transfundable: noun; A purchase that can be neither transferred to another party nor refunded. "Them airline tickets was non-transfundable!"

Numerous of times. adj; phrase Many. "He called me numerous of times and harassed me."

Noyum: Adj; A smooth floor covering used esp. in kitchens and bathrooms. "He threw a lamp at my head and it fell and ripped the noyum."

Over-tempered: adjective; Very angry. "I beat her up in the parking lot cause she had a frickin' nerve sleeping with my boyfriend and I got over-tempered."

Pacific: adjective; Particular. "Your honor, he said he wanted that pacific cell phone."

Pawnded: verb, past tense; when one has pawned an item. After I pawnded the engagement ring, I paid my rent.

Physical Altercation: noun; Skanks beating the crap out of each other over a worthless man. "We had a physical altercation and she bust me in my lip." (A phrase pronounced correctly but that has only one meaning on JJ so I included it.)

Presently: adverb; in the past. "I was presently being evicted at that time."

Repeative: adj; recurrent. "Her boyfriend is a repeative customer."

Revengual: adj; to take revenge. "After we had splitten up, he took revengual on me and keyed my car."

Revengeful: adj, variant of revengual. "She only keyed my car because she was revengeful."

Seen: verb, past tense; to have seen. "I seen my boyfriend out with her, so I keyed his car."

Spendy: noun; expensive. "He axed me to buy him a new cell phone and it was spendy."

Splitten: adj; when a couple has broken up. After we had splitten up, he still owed me for rent.

Supposably: adverb; purportedly. "Supposably he paid the cell phone bill with the money I borrowed him."

Squashed their beef: Verb; Resolved an argument. "Him and me squashed our beef over me totaling his car."

Texes: noun; More than one text. "He sent me them explicited texes!"

Tooken: verb, past tense; to have taken. I woke up to see he had tooken the keys and trashed my car.

Verbal words: noun; argument. "Him and me had verbal words."

Verbital agreement: noun; oral contract. "Her and me had a verbital agreement."

Vindiction: noun; syn. anger "She left me so I went over and shot her dog out of pure vindiction."

Honorable Mention:

RIGORMORTIS STEW: noun; A meal consisting of non-fresh roadkill, prepared by "Deliverance" cast clones. "I never et none of that rigormortis stew!"

May I respectfullly add 'stolded'? I don't have it no more cuz my brudder stolded it.

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Perhaps "limonia" is a lung infection resulting from eating too much citrus? Or cured by?

 

Thanks for getting this posted, Angela. My go-to source when I'm feeling blue or furiated.  And actually, I think "bicker-backer" may just end up in my personal lexicon.

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This was from Friday, but I'm just catching up today:

Reliable

Definition: responsible for damages

Example: "I wanted my name off the car because if anything would happen I'd be reliable for it."

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